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PACIFIC COMMERCIAL ADVERTISER. AUGUST 5, 1887.
FAT At Iut-rTleweJ By a "Reliable Corre sponds!" of "The f'ltlrmjo Time. Ilia carl ran thas: 3 1 v JONATHAN' KFEVER. rtrsiopE c Fat Wf. e,y, Peao Hollow. Wr-H.htr5rr (vultt. Pa N. b Tc2Tapi Alien Juii-.n'sb tsre 5 I c-t I trips ' Ltd "Ma J i-ra a qurrr buslo- to yea," ! ll&ii, fcbut iti verv iiale. Eaci in : was a TL-riipsoL.i.n d-iCw-or .r. iLiiaa, f requentJ j , in my r-ra. tkt, n-ie Lit: lu crrce tbat re a trifle oi.tiiit- c Lock I four rr fit pat.eiit-i, rr.-tt, but that's no more tLan the regular vtru lltj r iavtrttigaim', an" I got fa in return thkt paid riife ten iir-v-, over, 'ilng otcer things I fouixJ cat that it's jut as t a-y t j make a woman weigh .'w pourl- a it j.uii her up to i'y. At that time fat worr.v-Fi of any size was unkno wn. U'mri't a woiwn in the LiwineMi couM go over 4-; without i in br jttieoat. but now; Ju-t J---k at that," saifl hi proudly, ns he ;mt'.i ti.t- t: I enveloped barn wbi'.-h E.tL-l caliM h-r f t. ".She's only CV ju-t now. but ivait till I'm don ith her and you won't know h-r. Wiii they, Ethel?" iai-l he with some eiithu.-ia.-:u. Ethel erpr-! h-r con fi den- by a 03 , girUhb srni.e whi h r ieasure-l La'f a f t or Jess. "But a what is the proe";" "As far as the physioior-al side go it s my own secret, r sai 1 Kfver. - an" I couU get a heap o' money for it if I'd ieil. Provided you've got a fir-. r-las ubj-ct to woik with, all you want h to take fin e of the hurround in' conditions an' jde her my tni-. I lit on a little combination of two v--rb!e ex-tra'"t-t that bad a wonderful efT t in tiniu latinjf the liver. Not only that, but it strengthened the nerv o' the l:zie s;, -te.01 and abnormal: v devf;! v:-'l the aii l the recepta'-uluru rhyli. hi h rr-?-ri all the nu- ! t.ritioux part of the food, jiti'-kerlv the o!,.- j frtari" acid-., wM-h rniWo ail rhe fat. i SooYTai I sjof hold o' it I '.tw ff.rtiific ah-ad o' rue, an' I .ii'inf a.-'; v.roi My grad N--: i i wuth from J tO to IPn a v.e'-k, an' I g-T a j hteady royal y 0:1 every ose of ?iim, l.-'fi;-- j they ain't no failure-. Yon ti du'f f L if-. j th.it f'"ry wj'usn ran !e a iar in thi- l..-i- ' nv any more than iti any o?h-i. l',i' , .-n j i like They're lnn, n.,t nn-'.- " nd i Mr. Keevf-i rm Ul-d in .1 Jo-v. -hi- -i t ! way. "How do you t) -at thorn in a J h: ion t ' e I Umirr j "WU, the fu.-t. iio .jf y a ''lizi-h ir1 u- j IaHoii. ThT" must 1 nothi.u' around thf-m I" j ef -:f. Th" fu-tf thin I l'v,ki-i ou for aft'T I made up my iniii'l wijz a irf). r l-a!ity, and after some travfdm' I pi'-kfd out n little val ley ifi P-im'-j'lvnia and l-.uht a quarter e-tion. It to j-t tii- pla'f. No raihfiad-, J iki whiit In. no tlf-'iiiih-. floiioThm'. Thr ! was plenty o' r-owu an' Hover, hm suiiiiv-s an' auttts. The birds an' the le- made all the noirie, an' the vines climb up the veranda in a slow aort of a way that was very ''thin I begun with one girl, with her parents' con ent, though I had to take them, too, an' they (jot fat without any pay, but I n led with LT wonderful. Then I iran'-hd ontan'ad vertised, an' I've had my hands and the houe full ever Bince." "Do y'i undertake to develop any sub ject r . "Not by no mean. Subject., that is the best kind o subjects, is hard to find. I like to get 'em when they're children if I can. They must be healthy and not nervous. Your sleepy kind of a girl is the lj-t kind to work with. The lazier he Is the better. She don't want to have any curiosity alout any thing. Curiosity is what keers mist womi thin. Then he' pot to le sentimental in her dlsiKjeitirm. Sentiment is a great developer. Tbi again she must le good naturol and laugh easy. 'Laugh and grow fat' means a great deal more in my business than it doe on the cover of a comic almanac. V"hy, I had to discharge one of the Icst'rrien I ever had on that acmiit." "How was that?" "His name was Charles, and he came from Portsmouth, N. H. I hired him first as a farm laborer, but he was so speedy that I put him Into the 'escort department.' That s five or sir men I have to take the subjects t walk around the garden. I won't have no body in my employ, you know, who ain't a siuiler. They must have a natural smile, and help make the pla- cheerful. The trouble with Charlie wa he couldn't (jniile. The corners of his mouth dra wed down naturally, heredity done it, I s'jjse, an' be couldn't unile. 1 spoke to him alxtut it, an' he done hii best, but when he'd figgered out what he thought was a pretty good smile, he came an' ihowed it to me, an' 1 really felt sorry foi him. It was awful. 'T would ha ve stopjed tx Waterbury clock. Mo I tM him to ltt it go, an try an' talk pleasant to Yin, but 'twa- no use. Fat women is the niort sympathetic things in the world. They seen Charlie gom' around like a Westchester county Hamlet, an' they legun to worry an' wonder about his unbappiness, which was dead ugin rules. So 1 told him that Fairbanks and him couldn't agree and we had to part company. Twas a pity, though. He know'd hu business to a dot." "Do you give your subjects any book edu cation r "I give 'em what education they need. They all read, of course, but I have to Ik; very particler as to what they read. Iove. as I was tellin' you, is a great help, provided it' kept within imaginary limits. I don't let 'em read anything sensational, because that would make 'em nervous an' quicken the cir culation. Hanry James is my best holt. Henry James, to me, is the boss of them all. Why, if you could see me plant one of my pets out 011 the jxnh in the sunshine Bhadder, with one of James' books in her lap, it would d. jou good. Shell read for a while, say fifteen minutes; then her eyelids'll slip down, the book'il settle down in her lap and she'll bleep like ft baby for an hour. Then she ll come to herself, read a few pnges more an' quietly slip oil again inter dreams. I tell you, ir, wheu I've looked at a row of 'em, all peace- j ful, all happy, all 8leepin' quietly through a ! hot afternoon, I've wished I could meet Mr. JotxiM an' tell him what a blessin' he is to his ! time." I should think Uicy would want to get married." ; "No. I oducalo "cm out of that. I tell "em that ambition i3 bigger thing than matri- 1 tnony, and after they pass the 400 line an' lw- ' gin to take a pride in their business they never think of marry in'. There's except ions, though. I raised o girl from Connecticut Alice was 1 her name and was proud of her. She was a J regular delight to me. Had a erfect genius j for the business. She came to me in May, 'SU. rated ot ISO. and when I put her in one of my shows in September, 'S4. tdie whs fdO and Ktill a ri-dn Well, 6he traveled for a few months till she struck Memphis, Tenn., and what did 6be do but fall flat in love with the skeleton gentleman from Ohio. Ho was a splendid skeleton. Cost I ever r. Looked like a lot of slate pencils tied together with thread. I left 'em together there and came up to te farm for a couple o' months. The minute I got back to Memphis I knowed some- thin' was wrong. Ho tvas afraid to lock j me in the face, and I knew in a minute he'd 1 been cuttin' up some monkey shines. I clapped hinj on the scales and I was staggered, j Tha villain weighed ninety rounds, and his contract with me was for sixty-rive at the j outside. I looked ct Alice, an' she commenced j to cry. The long and short of it was she'd j fallen in love with him, they'd got engaged 1 while I was awaj', and she'd been giving him part of her tonic. I discharged him, but it j was no go. She commenced to pine and fall j away, air rather than lose her I had to let 'em get married, an' it ruined 'em both. They had to leave the business. She don't weigh oyer 200 to-day, and he's close to that figure himself. TLev thro wed away fame and for- Absolutely Pure. Tea ,v-".r r.-rrr-r v i.O: i. Arr.weior pur.Ty. Ftrrra a:. 1 v r.. iiore ec.ftOttJi! tnan U.-5 or ! fr: 1 -, tr- i cs.r-. V; sciJ u coca. Tt it'.o ) o-.M t,-.-; .,-.:;:.; ct short C'C iUTA- LiirU tVi4i -v. lvi W&UW N V MM. T. (OLEMAXi CO .tABenti, SAN rP.ANCV:0, CAL. ii wti i 3 (mm DR. PARDEE'S (The Only RIUbI Blood Poriflr.) A SPECIFIC FOR BHEUMATISjI, crofula, Salt Rheum, Neuralgia, Ring Worm ad all other Skin, and Blood Disease?. IT HEOtTLATES THB LIVER AND KIDNEYS. ires Indexation nd mX 4!ea rilmg fror' ta enfeebled condition of the jtm. Dr. Martine, of London, the ceh ted .pf.ciali-t, .savs of PARDEE'! EUEDY : " I have used it fort went; .us for Blood Diseases, puch a rofula, Halt Kheum, Teter and Cancer : 1 L cannot recommend it too highly.' i (kj Uev. Dr. Thomas, or Ilongkonp- li'.a, says: "PARDEE'S REMEDY :i wonderful medicine for the Blood ! .tve prescribed it hundreds of time r F.pro.y, arid when driven in tim wl'.vays cured the patient. 1 ca- "iy say that Leprosy will never brea! t on persons who take I'arokk'. w'IjY regularly, and I advi.se all je! li.ing in countries where T,epros ; revalent to take Pardee's IiEMi.i; ;i j'r.'ventive." "51 SALE BY ALL DRUCCISTS Ifi HONOLULU. eaUfccl iw N. F. HUliG ESS, Expressniiin & Drayman, 84 KiNJ sti:i-:kt, rtdet.hono N'. 202. HONOLULU. Waikiki Bath House! M ft. W. CROCKS JI.VI i 1 A KEN Clf ARGI of thte W&ikiki litth 1! ill-'.-. to liiforn Ij puMic tLat h(v,;l run the j ,ac at a Oral lass t)-,itl.lli( it Hiit. H'.s. CI'.t'ORi ittt ml Jo ;hf ldy patron f the place, ami - iy f.'otl will b? ixiade t nake it attractive. Tl'r-jylS OKDINCrs j;.V(.(.A(2K EXPIiES. M. x. s.' .vii;i:s, ii:u., Ieliver I5.(fc4, :tUli I rlK),t of I.ery Descrip tion witn 1-n . r:i i-t I: hi atil IMwratcli. Ofticr. HI liinc Street. I(o!ii Tele lK:i-. Stl. ItcsideiM-e. Iih Niiinttin Street. INI. .... . lTl('iliiK' tr l(eiil.aiee. :t. Wn. j:7,f l'.tt JOHN ruiLLirs, Practical IIiuiiImt, (iaslittci AMI Copporsmith, 71 King Street, Honolulu, II. I. IIOIM: Wit Mill' JOIi WOKK J'HOMI-TI.V T1KNM:I) 'H. Hath TuKs, Water C'lesets, Wash Ik. wis, riumh Hit; Uooli of all kinds alas hatnl. TO.r.-j'inel')tt' A. PALADIXJ, Wholesale anil Ketail Dealer inr-verv kind of "rli, .SHlt, NuioKei. fK'li'jel hiiO Iriet t IhIi. Keiuuvei to Clay--t. Market. .-,15-',17 Merchant St SAN I-mvi-i'o. t77uiy:t: WEXXER & CO. uud Homeuimlf 1-J Fort Street Have on i.aii'i "-w F(.r-j! J vWfirj". Watchos, BiMcolots, Necklets, Tins, Lockets, Clocks, Ami ornaments of al! ktiols. 3iIcov and Gold Plate, Kleuxnt Solid Silver TtH Hvt. SultHMo for I'r "eii tjUon. KNUIU VI.VH A N I t .N A Sr'rj:i VTIVK ;t v. JKWKLRY KeMirinif in nil itn Iirnurlim. tf Sol A tyupto fi.r S-mari-lvf re.er vers. til Of nil Dew rlptions of c:"r?Tz, 1 Mhiiu: Ito Jj BOOTS & SHOES O Orders from the other Islands solicited. Sn. 114 fori St., Ilonoluln. 9 .3&wt? .i& rv?jzs? i a:wh--"' a - SAN JOSE. CAL , U. S. A.' -A. California IProduction. :o:- D ! W. C. PEACOCK & CO., j 1 23 Nuuanu street - - - I-IoiioKiln H. I. j Solt! Agents in the Kiwaiiii ItliU'ls for J. J. MELCHER'-S " ELE1'ILNT " GIN, J. J. BELLI.SON'S j.ure, unojlored, un-wextened OLD BRANDIES, ! COATEf? & C.'. "I'LYMOUTH" CIN. I j 11 Y. W. SMITH .v co.-s 'tiii.-tli:m:w WI1ISKKY THK FJiEDEKICKSBUIW BREWIXti CO. Uf San Juse, Cal. I THE JOS. SCHLITZ BREWING CO. i ! Of Milwaukee. ! 31 ESSES. B. DREYFUS & CO.'S CALIFORNIA WlaSTJilS EXTRA DRY. E ARE NOW PLACING ON THE market the ECLIPSE CUVEES of 1870 and IS .SO, which for dryness and bouquet are unsurpassed, and are pleased to in form you that our efforts in producing a Champagne competing with the best Foreign Wines, have been appreciated, dispelling, in a great measure, the pre judice against pure native wines. The ECLIPSE will not only be found in every city in the Union, but has also found a market in the Republic of Mexico and on the Continent of Europe, where it is much appreciated by connoisseurs for its purity, lightness of alcoholic strength and exquisite bouquet and flavor. WE GUARANTEE OUR P u w We offer for sale at the lowe-t market rates, a full stock of the most favorite brands of Ales, Wines, Spirits, Liqueurs, Ete., Etc. Telephone o. 46. 373 I'. O. Boi SOI. PACIFIC HARDWARE CO., L'd, D I 1 1 1 Port Street Id onolialu :u: NEW GOODS JUST RECEIVED. AGATE II ON WALE, CHANDELIERS, LA-Ml's AND I ANTEENS, HOUSE FURNISHING GOODS, STOVES AND TINWARE, SILVER PLATED WARE, iEIMLLiNGIlAM PLOWSlEir AG RICULTURAL IMl'LE.M I NT GEN E RAL MERCHANDISE. A very full and fresh stock, at loweet market r rices. 66 M. W. McCHESEY & SOSS, 42 and 14 Queen St., HONOLULU. 43 Clay Street, SAN FRANCISCO, CAL As absolutely pure, and they are par excellence the SPARKLING JUICE OF THE GRAPE. They are produced precisely as the high-grade French Champagnes, by fermentation in the bottle, REQUIR- j ING TWO YEARS' CURE AND RACKING TO PERFECT, but differing from their foreign com petitors in being neither strengthened with spirit nor flavored in any manner. We claim, and can sub stantiate our claim, that our Champagnes are the purest Sparkling Wines in the world, and quote from the report to a comparative analysis made by the U. S. Department of Agriculture: "Of 200 samples of wines analyzed, nothing has been found on this continent equal to the ECLIPSE. Containing only the normal percentage of alcoholic strength in drv wines 10A ner epnt and onU- r.1 of RoooLarino cA. no fictitious flavorings." As a stimulant the ECLIPSE bears the highest recommendation of the leading! I 111 llAVfOV Hlirl 1 V llO I PJH I P iTl'nPPVC faculty of the United States, and wherever exhibited for competition with anv other Champagnes, either XA11 T UA LL i ClllKl ' T lllOCllO U 1 foreign or native, its merits are attested by the highest awards. We caution you against the impositions of parties East and on the Coast, who are foisting on the mar ket a 4'gas" or charged wine, under the name of California Champagne. Remember, none are genu ine except those bearing our name and brand, on both cork and label, and which are sold with the guarantee of absolute purity. HONOLULU, May 7, 1SS7. HAMILTON JOHNSON, Honolulu: Dear Sir Iharr made a chemical examination of the nample of Haraszthy ''vVc" Champagne taken by me' from your store, and Jintl that this nine contains no adulteration whatever, the arid present Leina the nat ural arid of the grape, while the 'bouquet" and gas jrresent ore such as would rcfni'.from the natural fer mentation of the wines. Youth very trvly, OEO. IF. SMITH, Of r,enon, Smith A- Co., Druggist. WE ALSO CARRY A FULL STOCK OF OT T) A TT CONSISTING OF Table and Zinfandel Clarets, Hocks, Riesling, Gutedel, Gerke, Burgundies, Ports, Sherries, Madeira, Mus catel, Angelicas and Pure Grape Brandies. ARPAD HARASZTHY & PRODUCERS, SAN FRANCISCO. I A FILL LINE OF STAPLE AND FANCY GltOCEKJES. COFFEES, TEAS AND SPICES. Ores res By3 WINES, Plantation Stores, Salmon, Beef, Pork, Flour. Beans, Bread, etc. Fresh arrivals Ly every steamer and sailing: vessel. Sj-ecial inducements? offered to IVrtUiruese Traders, in a variety of Fresh Goods epj-ecialiy suited to their wanU. iiioiiKsr cami ep.ic e i-Aiii ion Dry and Green Hides and Goat Skins I.ARGKST ASSOItTEK ST K"K or iI!OCEl!IES OX Till: ISLAND TrT.A.Y ftiicl G-HjrVlTS!. 4-2 hii.I 4 1 queen Street, Honolulu. e.?-my22 ly JOHN IN" O T T CO. liKi.'- : : : ' -. tofft i-ymn x&sfr Sole Agent Hawaiian Islands. WINE VAULTS, 88 FORT STREET. Stores, Ranges and Hoiisekeerin; Goas. Plumbing, Tin, Copper nnd SIh pt lion W ork C7 s