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PACIFIC COMMERCIAL ADVERTISER, MARCH 26, 1888.
A TRYING ORDEAL HOW A COLLEGE STUDENT SUPPED WITH THE PRESIDENT. The Boys Rob the Ilenroost of One oi the Faculty A Nice Young Man Caught in a Trap Before the Faculty The Re finement of Torture. In the early years of this century, when log houses were good enough for the average Georgian, a certain doctor presided over Franklin college. The simple habits of their dignified sires did not prevent the boys of those days from having their fun indeed, they carried on an amount of devilment which the college boys of these times would consider respectable. The boys thought that anything was fair which would make one of the faculty the vic tim of a joke, and on one occasion they laid a dark plot to rob the doctor's poultry yard and afterward celebrate the event by a mid night banquet. The doctor's chickens were the pride of his domestic establishment, and he had built for their accommodation a log house. The logs were "notched down" at the corners and held in place by their own weight and the roof. At a late hour the boys repaired to the hen house, armed with a fence rail. It was an easy matter to insert the rail between two logs and prize up those above, so as to make an opening through which a man could crawl. A dapper young fellow, who had visited th doctor's daughters, went in and began to pull the chickens off the roost and wring their necks. While he did so the boys outside kept their weight on the rail, and so kept the crack open for his escape. The nice young man, whom we will call Bob, had dropped about a dozen chickens outside, and the whole crowd was in high glee over the pros pective banquet. DANGER AT HAND. Just then a big, old rooster crowed. "Lookout, Bob; break that rooster's neck and stop his noise." "Shi What's that?" There was a low growl. "Boys, you have let these logs down too low; lift them a little so I can get out. Be quick about it." At that instant there was a loud bark and a big dog bounded into the poultry yard. The boys on the outside for an instant stood their ground. They dropped the rail and they grabbed chance weapons to beat off the dog, but before they could disable him the door of the doctor's residence opened and his tall figure appeared. The boys scattered, all but one. The logs had come together again and Bob was a prisoner. He crouched in a cor ner and held his breath, hoping that he would be overlooked, but the dog told where he was. By this time the doctor had come up and other members of the family came out, eager to see who was caught in the man trap. "Why, it's Bob." "Who would have thought it?" The ex clamations were heard in the house and echoed by the young ladies. Then the door of the log house was opened and the young man was sent to -the dormitory. He was called before the faculty the next morning. The poor fellow would have sold himself for a song, and expected to be peremptorily ex pelled and perhaps prosecuted. THE DOCTOR'S CONCLUSIONS. Meantime the doctor had thought the mat ter over. He was a man of great sagacity in the management of boys, and he recognized this freak as a piece of wild mischief which might not be meanness. He resolved to give the matter such disposition as would put a sober head on the young man. Accordingly, when Bob appeared, looking like a criminal, the doctor lectured him severely, but in a fatherly way, and told him that such an offense must not go without a severe punish ment. Bob expected the sentence of his expulsion. With measured tones, like a judge pronounc ing the death sentence, the doctor said: "Mr. , I will expect you to take suppei with me to-night, and, as you show a fond ness for chicken, the fowls you took off the roost last night will be on the table." Bob would rather have been expelled. But for the distress it would cause his parents he would have gone home. In spite of his larks there was good stuff in Bob, and with a tre mendous effort he resolved to face the music. It is impossible to describe the mental ag ony Bob went through that evening when he sat at the table where the doctor presided with courtly dignity. His elegant wife could not have been more courteous to an honored guest than she was to Bob, and her daughters treated the young man as cordially as ever. Not a word was said about the affair of the night before, but the la. 03 dish of chickens was like a mount ain in the poor boy's eyes. It was the refine ment of torture when the doctor, with the utmost suavity. helted him to the choicest pieces. The situation, which, under ordinnry cir cumstances, would have been ludicrous, under the doctor's composure and his wife's tact was carried almost to the pathetic. It was a lesson written on Bob's memory in burning letters, and he never forgot it. At lanta Journal. After Spies in Paris. In Paris there is a reporter who plays a unique role even in French journalism. He is the "monsieur qui suit les femraes." And he does It most assiduously. Once on theii track ho never takes his lynx eye off them. Night end day, note book in hand, he follows them up. But not with the same object as the male pest of the street or the area sneak. He is animated with nothing but the purest patriotic motives. He is, in fact, on the look out for foreign spies in petticoats. Any "woman who looks Teutonic in appearance is labeled as a suspect whose movements are closely watched and afterward recorded in The Lanterne, the journal which is fortunate enough to possess this reportorial musquito. Up to the present he has succeeded in bag ging two victims, whom he concluded were emmisaries of Bismarck in disguise, because they never passed French soldiers without looking at them, and kept up a mysterious relationship with a "monsieur blond." The spy mania has, therefore, advanced a stage. Any foreign women in France, because, for sooth, they look interestingly at French sol diery, or hold any communication with a "monsieur blond," are liable to be hunted down by the eavesdropping representative of the grande reportage. Chicago Times. Emma Abbott's Tenors. "My husband tells me that I throw too tnuch energy and waste too much force on the stage, but I know better. One can do nothing without a degree of enthusiasm. Jfow, I have a terrible time with my tenors. "When they are singing their love passages they forget and don't look at all loving. Now, rforRuy Bias' I have been over and over ngain the love passages and drilled and trilled so as to have them perfect, and I keep wno one nice, sharp little finger nail, and when we are on the stage if they don't look Joving I just remind them. They know what toh&t means." "That's why your love scenes are so real r ' "Why, of course it is." Nashville Ameri ... . ... - . A GOOD LIBRARY. HINTS AND SUGGESTIONS FOR MAN WHO READS. THE The First Law in Selecting Books A Library Should Grow with the Mind. Keep Your School Books Light Litera ture. Thr first law in selecting books is, I am sure, to buy along the line of your special work. I do not say in the line, for that is precisety what is not wanted. What we want is not to be told what we can see or find out for ourselves, but what will enable us to, see more broadly than our separate experience would lead us to see. Books, while not lead ing us away from sure and special bines ol lif work, should keep us from narrowing ourselves into grooves. The second law is to buy books, in the main, as we need them. A library should grow with the mind. These two rules can be illus trated together. We will suppose a man's special line is anthropology. Plainly he must also be a good student of history. He must also be well acquainted with recent biological researches! which involve paleon tology and zoology, at least as far as results of investigation go. He will not have gone fur before evolution, as a scientific problem, must be handled. Dealing fairly with this, be finds himself involved in ancient religious theories and comparative theology. I need not carry the process farther, but I say his library should be (1) a working library along this line, and (2) his books should be bought as needed. The possession of a large number of books is not the possession of a library. Books, however inherently valuable under certain circumstances, under other circumstances be come lumber. It is like a thousand acre farm, of which only ten acres are worked, while the owner lives in a bit of a hovel. It is im possible to express too strongly the close re lation that mind growth should bear to library growth. It should be like the growth of bone to a man's flesh. No one should sell or give away his books that have been used and seem no longer need ful. Especially should old school books and college books be sacredly kept. To no other books do we sustain so intimate personal re lationship. We shall surely miss the very copy of Horace and of De Amicitia that we grew familiar with, and some day will desire to turn to a passage in "Ars Poetica," or "Via Sacra," and it will not be quite the same as when we read it in sophomore year on the log in the glen wAh Classmate Stevens. I give every boy and girl warning not to part with their text books in literature and classics. Even my old Webster's spelling book would now be a treasure to me. Are such books part of a library? Most truly, yes. They are the very essential part of a library the tools we have used as we came along but tools that never wear out. Perhaps a careful distinction should be made between the books in our study and those in the library proper; for each man should have his library, and each family should have its library. The latter should be built on a less restricted plan; yet certainly under careful rules. A home library should, above all, have an atmosphere of refinement and good society. It should not admit a low bred book any more than our drawing rooms should admit the familiarity of low bred people. An hour spent in it should produce the refreshment that comes from a social hour with witty and good friends. A really good home library must include rescripts; it is sometimes a pity oftener not. There are not 100 good authors in general lit erature that cannot be wisely compressed. It will not pay to read them through. These "Half Hours" with the best authors are nec essary and valuable. But when it comes to history I am not so sure. And as for "Beau ties of Ruskin," "Beauties of Goethe," etc., etc., let us burn them. If I cannot go into a rose garden for myself, I will thank you for a bunch of flowers; but for you to run ahead of me with your nose and demand that I shall smell over again your bouquet, I am in clined to select for myself. A good library grows as our souls grow; it widens out its sympathies and gets a larger outlook. But at the same time a sloughing goes on. We only grow well as we can die well. Some people have great difficulty in dying to anything; they equally fail to grow; that is, to enlarge. Such are your religious bigots. I hate to see a man who reads an author by the dose one dose a day; two doses a day the way my grandmother took her Bible, and as many take it yet, but in smaller pellets. I have a friend who carries Shakespeare in his pocket, and bolts a por tion each day. He resembles for all the world a pump that is clogged up from having its chain run too deep, bhakespeare has always been too deep for the fellow, and he is only pumping sand and gravel. Another took to carrying a mathematical treatise. He is him self an equal angled triangle inscribed in a circle. .We must be able to change intellec tually, outgrow, and grow away from old tastes. We all have our chromo period some stop there. The bulk of novels is of no more value than blank paper. Children who have little real world as yet need a great deal of the possible and ideal. Novels, contrary to common opinion, are peculiarly the books. for the young true novels. Curiously, the world's earliest literature was mostly imaginative. W have poems and tales 7,000 years old, while logic did not find utterance till about 2,500 years ago. Voyages, travels, , natural history gradually come to serve in the place of novels, the actual in the place of the pos sible. Lowell urges the use of such old vol umes of travel as were written by voyagers "when the world was fresh and unhack neyed." That last word of Lowell's tells the story very fully. A well visited place in England was one that hackney coaches ran to anil from it was Hackneyed. Today the a 1 TT 1 t t T-v -, wnoie woria is uacicneyea. "je. r. jr." in Globe-Democrat. A Remarkable Case. Under the above heading the "Don caster Reporter" of July 6, 1887, pub lishes the following in its editorial col umns: Our readers may recall the circumstance of a young clerk, named Arthur Richold, falling insensible on the Wheatley Lane in this town some time ago, and being picked up, as he continued perfectly helpless, and taken in a cab bv two gentlemen to the office of F. W. Fisher, Esq.. the solicitor who employed him. On restoring him to consciousness it was ascertained that he was afflicted with what seemed to be an incurable disease. When he was able to speak he said he had been to his dinner and was on his way back to his work, when suddenly his head was in a whirl and he fell in the street like a man who is knocked down. On coming to his senses in" the solicitor's office he thought what this might mean, and feared he was going to have a fit of illness, which we all know is a very dreadful thing for a poor man with a family to care for. With this in his mind he at once sought the best medical advice, telling the doctors how he had been attacked. They ques tioned him, and found that his present malady was exhaustion of the nervous system, resulting from general debility, indigestion and dyspepsia of a chronic nature. This in turn had been caused by confinement to his desk and grief at the loss of dear friends by death. The coming on of this strange disease, as described by Mr. Richold, must be of interest both to sick and well. He had noticed for several years previously, in fact, that his eyes and face began to have a yellow look; there was a sticky and unpleasant slime on the eums and teeth in the morning: : the tonerue coated : and the bowels so bound and costive that it induced that most pain ful and troublesome ailment the piles. He says there was some pain in the sides and back and a sense of fullness on the right side, as though the liver were enlarg ing, which proved to be a terrible fact The secretions from the kidneys would be scanty and hisrh-coloredi with a kind of gritty or sandy deposit after standing. These things had troubled Mr. Richold a long time, and after his fall in the street he clearly perceived that his fit of giddi ness was nothing more than a sign of the steady and deadly advance of the com plaint, which began in indigestion and dys pepsia. His story of how he went'from one physician to another in search of a cure that his wife and little ones might not come to want is very pathetic and touching. Finally he became too ill to keep his situation and had to give it up This was a sad calamity. He was appalled to think of how he should be able to live. But God raised up friends who helped to keep the wolf from the door. He then went to the seaside at Walton on-the-Naze, but neither the change, nor the physicians who treated him there, did any good. All being without avail he visited London, with a sort of vague hope that some ad vantage might happen to him in the me tropolis. This was in October, 1885. How wonderful, indeed, are the ways of Providence, which dashes down our high est hopes and then helps us when we least expect it. While in London he stated his condition to a friend, who strongly advised him to try a medicine which he called Mother Seigel's Curative Syrup, saying it was gen uine and honest, and often cured when everthing else had failed. He bought a bottle of a chemist in Pimlico, and began using it according to the directions. He did this without any faith or hope, and the public may, therefore, judge of his surprise and pleasure when after taking a few doses he felt great relief. He could eat better, his food distressed him less, the symptoms we have named abated, the dark spots which had floated before his eyes like smuts of soot gradually disap peared, and his strength increased. Before this time his knees would knock together whenever he tried to walk. &vttMtmtnt$ &totrtistmtnis. METEOPOLITAN Meat Company, 81 KINO NTItKET, G. J. WALLER, Advert IS THE MANAGER. JlSJ IN THE WHOLESALE AND RETAIL BUTC HERS o- ANP FMLT -FOR- LS CONSTIPATION Sluggish Liver, ETC., ETC., ETC., TTNLIKE many kinds of cathartic medicines, do not make you feel worse before you feel better. Their op eration is gentle, but thorough, and unattended with disagreeable effects, such as nausea, griping pains, etc. Seigel's Operating Pills are the best family physic that has ever been discov ered. They cleanse the bowrels from all irritating substances, and leave them in a healthy condition. The best remedy extant for the bane of our lives constipation and sluggish liver. These Pills prevent fevers and all kinds of sickness, by removing all pois onous matter irom the bowels. They operate briskly, yet mildly, without any pain. If you take a severe cold, and are threatened with a fever, with pains in So encouraged the head, back, and limbs, one or two was he now that he kept on using Mother Seigel's Curative Syrup until it ended in completely curing him. In speaking of his wonderful recovery Mr. Richold says it made him think of poor Robinson Crusoe, and his deliver ance from captivity on his island in the sea; and added, "But for Mother Seigel's Curative Syrup the grass would" now be growing over my grave." Our readers can rest assured of the strict truth of all the statements in this most re markable case, as Mr. Richold (now resid ing at Swiss Cottage, Walton-on-the-Naze,) belongs to one of the oldest and most re spected families in the beautiful village of Long Melford, Suffolk, and his personal character is attested by so high an au thority as the Rev. C. J. Martyn. We have deemed the case of such importance to the public as to justify us in giving this short account of it in our columns. Cider That Sells for Champagne. The innkeeper fished out from the gloomy and cobwebby depths of a sub-counter closet a quart bottle which bore such marks of age as would have made the mouth of an epi curean wine bibber water with anticipated delight. The cork came out with a mighty pop, and a fine spray filled the air with mist and the aromatic fragrance of champagne. "Try a glass of that," said the innkeeper, as he hliea two glasses with the sparkling fluid. The tourist needed no urging. "Why, that doesn't taste like cider, neither is it champagne, exactly. What do you call itr "Cider." "How did you make it?" "I bottled it three days ago. It was fresh, Sweet, strained cider then. I put in each bottle a couple of raisins and a small lump of rock candy, and if you can find any cham pagne chat costs less than ten cents a bottle that will beat that I will buy 1,000 cases of it" "I should think it could be sold in some country places for champagne?" "I've sold a good many hundred bottles ofit.wN v "In what country town V asked the tourist. "In New York city." New York Mail and Express. Bone MealMBone Meal BONK MKAL (WARRANTED PURE), FROM the Manufactory of BUCK ft ASHLAND San Francisco. Orders foi this Celebrated Fertilizer will now be received by the undersigned. Planters are requested to send their orders in early, so that there will be no delay in having them tilled in irue for the planting season. 'Also, Super - Phosphates, A Fine Fertilizer for Cane. Ordersrecefved In quantities to snit. 2l-wtf WM. G. IRWIN & CO. .Agents. doses of Seigel's Operating Pills will break up the cold and prevent the fever. A coated tongue, with a brackish taste, is caused by foul matter in the stomach. A few doses of Seigel's Operating Pills will cleanse the stom ach, remove the bad taste, and restore the appetite, and with it bring good health. M I Oftentimes disease, or partially de cayed food, causes sickness, nausea and diarrhoea. If the bowels are cleansed from this impurity with a dose of Seigel's Operating Pills, these disa greeable effects will vanish, and good health wrill result. Seigel's Operating Pills prevent ill-effects from excess in eating or drink ing. A good dose at bedtime renders a person fit for business in the morning. These Pills, being sugar-coated, are pleasant to take. The disagreeable taste common to most pills is obviated. For Sale by all Chemists, Drng-glsts and Medicine Vendors. PROPRIETORS A. J. WHITE LIMITED S. C. ALLEN, M. P, ROBINSON. ALLEN & ROBINSON, AT UOBIXSOVS WHARF, DEALERS IN LUMBER and all kinds of BUILDINO MATERIALS, Paints, Oils, Nails, etc., etc. AGENT rOB SCHOONERS KULAMANU. KEKAULUOAI, MARY ELLEN, PAUAHI, FAIRY QUEEN UILAMA LEAHI. " Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands. 80-wtt S. BOTH, MERCHANT TAILOR, 83 Fort St., Honolulu, II. I. 84-wtl HOLLISTER & CO., Druggists and Tobacconists, WHOLESALE AND RETAIL. 09 Nuuann Street, and cor. Fort & Merchant Sts 83 wtf PttJBMSHE EVERY MORixG Navy Contractors. MOTHER SEIGEL'S OPEBATIIG -o- OfKce, 46 and 48 Merchant Street, HohJ -:o;- THE ADVERTISER Represents the Interests of the Politician, the Menh Planter, the Storekeeper, the' Lawyer, the Workman, fact, all Classes of the Community. THE ADVERTISER in Has for many years been noted for its Reports of Le Proceedings, Important Law Cases, etc. These a Verbatim when the importance of the occasion warrants it THE ADVERTISER Is a necessity to Everv English. sneaking Inhabitant ol - f O L O Kingdom who desires to keep pace with the times. THE ADVERTISER Is copious and prompt in the publication of Local New, its readers are kept constantly posted as to the course off in other parts of the world, particularly in the United Sta'. Wcokly Paio Gonial iii Is specially adapted for portions of residents of the outlying the group. 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