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DAILY PACIFIC COMMERCIAL ADVERTISER, MARCH 10, 1SSD.
A TiniXG ORDEAL. HOW A COLLEGE STUDENT SUPPED WITH THE PRESIDENT. The Hoy Rob th HenrooU of One ol the ramify A Nice Young Man Canht In a Trap I5-foro tJie Faculty Tlio K llnenu nt of Torture. In t';o onrlr yeirs cf this century, when log hour's wero cool enough for the nvernprt (Jvorpan, a certain djctor prisidod over Franklin collet". TIjo simpla liaMt of thc-ir tliniflvl sin-"5 dicl not irov.:nt tho loys of tho l,iv3 from hain th:ir fun imlo.-!, they c.irril on nn amount of devilment which the college Loy. of thest") times would rnnsi'lt-r ririect.iSle. The. hoys thought that anything was fair which would make on.jof the faculty the vio tim of a j"!ce, nnd on ono o'-'-fisinn they laid a dark j.lot to rob the doctor's jw.ltry yard and afterward celebrate the event Ly a mid night binqU'-t. The doeb.r's chickens wer Hie pride of his domestic establishment, nnd he bad built for their accommodation a lo; house. The los wero "noU he.1 down" nt the corners and bold in place by thHr own weight and tho roof. At a late hour tho boys repaired to tho hen house, firmed with a feneo rail. It was an easy matter to insert the rail between twe logs and prize up those al)Ovc, so as to make an openiii through which amau could crawL A dapiKT younjj fellow, who had visited tlx d'tctors daughters, went in and Ix-gan to pull tho chickens oil the. roost and wring their necks. While ho did so tho boys outsido kept their weight on the rail, and so kept the crack ojii for his escajx?. Tho nico young man, whom wo will call Bob, hod dropped about a dozen chickens outside, and the whole crowd was in hih gleo over the pros pective luiiiuct. PAXGEP. AT IT AND. Just then a big, old rooster croweL "Look out, Ifcjb; break that rooster'3 neck and sto his noise." "Sh! "What's that r Thero was a low growl. "Boys, you Lava let these, logs down too low; lift them a little so I can get out. Bo quick alout it." At that instant thero was n loud bark and nbig dog bounded into the poultry yard. The boys on tho outside for an instant stood their ground. They dropped tho rail and they grablcd chaneo weapons to boat off the dog, but leforo they could disablo him the door of tho doctor's resideuco opened and his tali figure apjeared. Tho boys scattered, all but one. Tho logs had coino together again and Bob was a prisoner. IIo crouched in a Hor ner and held his breath, hoping that he .Hid be overlooked, but tho dog told where h vas. By this timo tho doctor had come up and other members of the family eamo out, eager to see who was caught in t he man trap. 'Why, it's Bob." "Who would havo thought it?"' The ex clamation were heard in tho house, nnd echoed by tho young ladies. Then tho door of the log houso was oiened and tho young man was Pent to tho dormitory. IIo was called 1-cf ore the faculty the next morning. Tho poor fellow would have sold himself for a song, and expected to be peremptorily ex pelled and perhaps prosecuted. TUB DOCTOK'3 CONCLUSION'S. Meantime tho doctor had thought the mat ter over. IIo was a man of great sagacity in tho management of boys, and he recognized this freak as a piece of wild mischief which might not bo meanness. He resolved to give the matter 6uch disposition as would put n sober head on the young man. According!-, when Bob appeared, looking like a criminal, the doctor lectured him severely, but in a fatherly way, and told him that such an offenso must not go without a severe punish ment. Bob expected the sentence of his expulsion. With measured tones, like a judge, pronounc ing tho death sentence, the doctor said: '31r. , I will expect you to take suppei with mo to-night, and, as you show a fond ness for chicken, tho fowls you took off the roost last night will bo on the table." Bob would rather have been expelled. But for the distress it would causo his parents h would have gone homo. In fpito of his larki there was good stuff in Bob, and with a tre mendous effort he resolved to f aco the music. It is impossible to describe the mental ag ony Bob went through that evening when he sat at the table where tho doctor presided with courtly dignity. His elegant wife could not have been more courteous to an honored guest than she was to Bob, and her daughters treated the young man as cordially as ever. Not a word was said about tho affair of the night before, but tho la c i dish of chickens was liko a mount ain in the poor boy's eyes. It was tho reluie ment of torture when the doctor, with the utmost suav'ty, helped him to the choicest pieces. Tho situation, which, under ordinary cir cumstances, would havo been lulicroi:, under tho doctor's composure and his wife's tact wot. carried almost to the pathetic. It was a lesson written on Bob's memory in burning letters, and he never forgot it. At lan Journal After Spies la Tart. In Paris thero is a reporter who ays a unique role even in French journalism, lie Is tho "monsieur qui suit les femmes." AnJ he docs It most assiduously. Once on then track he never takes his lynx eye off them. Night and day, note book in hand, ho follows them up. But not with the same object as tho male iest of the stieet or tho area sneak. He is animated with nothing but tho purest patriotic motives, IIo is, in fact, on tho look out for foreign spies in retticoats. Any woman who looks Teutonic in appearance is labeled as a suspect whoso movements are closely watched and afterward recorded iu Tho Lanterno, tho journal which is fortunate enough to possess this reportorial musquito. Up to tho present ho has tuccoeded in bag ging two victims, whom ho concluded were mmisarii-s of Bismarck in disguise, because they nevir passed French soldiers without looking at, them, and kept up a mysterious relationship with a "monsieur blond." The spy mar.ia has, therefore, advanced a stage. Any foreign women in France, Wenuse, for sooth, they look interestingly at French sol diery, or hold any communication with a uionsieur blond," are liable to lo hunted down by the eavesdropping representative of i tho grando rejortage. Chicago Times, l'ninia Abbott's Tenors "My husband tells mo that I throw too i much energy and waste too much f orco oil tho stage, but I know better. Ono can do nothing without a degree of enthusiasm. Now, I have a terrible time with my tenors. When they are singing their lovo passages .hey forget and don't look at all loving. Now, for 'Buy Bias' I have boen over and over ngiin tho love passages and drilled nnd drilled so as to have them perfect, and I keep me ono nice, sharp little finger nail, and when wo are on the stage if they don't look loving I just remiud them. They know what that means." "That'n why your love scones are so real T "Why, of course It i.' Nashville Ameri can. vsirryins ntols Three Feet .njr. The be?t w.iy to stopt!e caj-rving of flro rm is suggest! ty The Now Orleans Christian Advocate. Everylo,Iy is to be al lowed to carry arms, but every pistol must te three feet long, and worn 05 enly. Wear- 5Vi PittGl1 " be Punied li' a Una C. BREWER & COMPANY, (Minlterti. GKNEKA I. M ERCANTILE COMMISSION AGENTS. LIST OF OFFICERS; P. C. Jo'ips. Jr President anil ?Ianager J. O. Carter Treasurer and Secretary lion. W. i . AlK-u Auditor DIRECTORS: lion. C. R. Bishop, lion. n. 'Waterhouse Win! Wo Chan & Co., NUUANU STREET, Have Just Received by Late Arrivals A large and well assorted Stock of hand-painted China Dinner and Tea Sets To which the attention of intending pur chasers i.s directed, as no goods of equal quality have ever been imported into this market. Also, all varieties and qualities of Silk Handkerchiefs, Of Chinese and Japanese make. Also, TO ARRIVE by bark " VELOCITY," now due, an assortment of GRANITE Paving and Curb Stones and a few CLINKER BUILT BOATS. 155-ly LEWIS & CO.; FORT STREET, Importers, Wholesale and Retail Dealers in Groceries and Provisions. tSTlce House ool a Kieclalty.!ft 181-tf HONOLULU MARKET. (Successor to Wm. McCandlesa.) Xo. 6 lueen Street, FJh Market, Ho nolulu, II. I. Choicest Beef, Mutton, Pork, Fish VEGETABLES. ETC., Always Kept on Hand. Family and Shipping orders Carefully Attended to. Live Stock Furnished to Vessels at short notice. Telephones 2SJ"o. 212 LOVE'S BAKERY. JVo. 73 unann Street. MRS. ROBT. LOVE, Proprietress. Every Description of Plain and Fancyi Bread and Crackers, F R E 8 U Soda Crackers A N D Saloon Bread Always on llaiid. MILK BEEAD A SPECIALTY. Island Orlers Promptly Attended to. 172-Sm 1 II 351 IMPERISHABLE aangc iii 'hit ttmmmm ai PERFUME. Murray & Lanman's FLORIDA WATER, Best Tor TOILET. BATH, and SICK ROOM. TO PLANTERS! HAVING RECENTLY IMPROVED ami strengthened our construction of 2-Itoller Mill, as also the slat feeding mechan ism for same with very satiilactory results, w are now prepared to contract for that class of machinery at short notice. We have patterns on hund for 4nX(;cin., 3i66in., 32sS'in.. 30x6Cia., 3C?-iin., 2Cx31in. sizes of rollers, steel shafting and steel gearing throughout vrith any desired type cf engine, r they can he driven from engine In use on 3-Roll Mill, by compounding the same, thereby economizing steam. Result under eqtai. conditions guaranteed ttnbttb tasmed by any pt'ier construction or system of tzzvivg. J. X. S. WILLIAMS. Aent Rlsdon Iron and Locomotlv Works, 188l24-tf San franeisco. (general Uircrtisrmcnts. GEO. W. LINCOLN, THE WELL-KNOWN BUILDER, IS STILL IN THE FIELD AS A Con tractor, and is now better prepared to do any and all kinds ot work appertaining to contracting or any other class of work belonging to his trade, in the same pood and workmanlike manner as heretofore; having curtailed my shop expenses and still retain plenty of room to do any and all kinds of work appertain ing to the building trade that may be entrusted to my care. 1 am enabled to do the same at verv low rates, to suit the extremely dull tims, and at the same time bearing in mind that what is worth doing at all is worth doin well. Thanking the I 65 W YETH' S LIQUID MALT EXTRACT Contains ail the nutritive virtues of the best Malt Liquors while it is FREE from all stimulating effects. ISTOT -A BEVERAGE. -o- The following analysis the proportion of alcohol in the Malt Extract as Com pared with Malt Liquors: Alcohol. ! Klir:e Water. English small beer 3.2 ; 2.4 91.4 Lager beer (Brooklyn) 2.8 ; 2.3 91.4 Malt extract (Wyeth's)' 2..t 15.0 82.4:3 The Manufacturers, Messrs. Jno. Wvetii & Bko., Phil., have appointed BENSON, SMITH & COMPANY, l-3rn The Equitable Life Assurance Society OK THE UNITED STATES. Stands First Ami the Leasing Life Assurance Companies of the World In Outstanding Assurance, in New Business, in Surplus, in Total Income, in Premium Income, in the annual Increase in Surplus and Assets, in the Percentage of Assets to Liabilities, and in all other Important Respects. Assets. Dec. 31, 1887, : : : $81478,901 85. Outstanding Assurance S -183,039,563 New Business of 1887 138,0 33,105 Surplus (4 per cent. Standard) 18,104,355 Increase in Surplus during the Year 1,748,379 Increase in Assets during the Tear 8,868,433 Total Income 23,340,849 Premium Income iy,115,77 Percentage of Assets to Liabilities 137 1-2 A Careful Study of the above Proves Conclusively that the Equitable Society is the most Prolltable and Secure Life Assurance Company for Intending Assurers. A.LEX. J. CARTWRIGHT, 90-tf GENERAL AGENT HAWAIIAN ISLANDS. HAWAIIAN GAZETTE Printing Establishment Merchant St., Plain and Fancy Printing IXCLUDINO- Luw Books and Blanks, Pamphleta of any kind, Lawyers' Briefs, Freight and Plantation Books, Statistical Work, Colored Poster Work, Lithograph Colored Cards, Business and Visiting Cards, Ball and Wedding Curds, Programmes, Billheads, Letterheads printed in Copying Ink, Etc., Etc., Etc., PROMPTLY AKD NEATLY EXECUTED. -:o: ADDRESS THE HAWAIIAN GAZETTE CO., H. M. WHITXEY, Business Manager. public for past favors, remain respectfullv yours, GEO. W. LINCOLN. SOLE AGENTS FOR THE IIAW'N ISLANDS. Honolulu. Ex Bark H. Hackfeld FROM LIVER rOOL, IRON FILTERPRESSES ! Selwig & Lanse's Patent 18 to 30 rChambers, TTliirh fcave proved a c;rat success at I.ihue, Ilanamaniu, Kekaha, Wtiinea, Koloa, Lahaina, Laupaboeboe. etc., and which are provided w ith the latest improvements; also, SPAKE PARTS OF ABOVE PRESSES and FILTER CLOTH FOR THE SAME ; Sugax Coolers, (round corners) Irtn Tanks, 3 sizes; Baxter Engines, Deane's Steam Pumps, Steel Bails fcEixtures TortaWe Track, Sleepers & Switches, Corrugated Iron, all lengths; Fire Bricks, Slates, Fire Clay, Asbestos, White Bros Portland Cement Germania F. Cement, Keg Shocks, IUvets, Sugar and Coal Bags, Coal Baskets, Twine, Stockholm and Coal Tar, Etc. For Sale at Lowest Kates by H. HACKFELD & CO. 13G-lm Notice of Co)artnersliip. raiian Transfer Co. rpilK UNDERSIGNED, HAVING rUR a chased the business of J. Green and the American Express Company, have con solidated under the tirni name of the HAWAIIAN TRANSFER COMPANY, and are prepared to carry on the Dra3'injj and Express business of all kinds. 2-Telephone office at No. 73 King St., next door to llobt. More's. Uell 1GO Telephones Mutual 5G5. -All kinds of carting faithfully and promptly attended to; furniture removed and carefully handled; always on hand on arrival of steamers. If you want a wagon or drajr you will find it to your advantage to rinfi up either of our telephones. J. W. McGUIKE, lo-im J. McQueen. Just Received ex Slmr. Mariposa From New Zealand ! The First Lot of New Zealam Potatoes -AND Onions, -FOR SALE EY II. MAY & CO. 33-lw To Arrive ! Bock Salt for Cattle. fTA few tons still undisposed of. APPLY EARLY. Theo. H. Davies & Co. llO-lru W&kX k LAMWS Florida Water THE UNIVERSAL PERFUME for the Toilet, the Uath and the Handkerchief. -REPO RT- OF Prof. Alexander Wassiliewltsch PoeH Analyzing Chemist for the Russian Governmemt St. Petersburg : "Murray & Lanman's FLORIDA WATER does NUT contain any integral parts which could be pernicious to health." " The comparative investiga tion has shown th.Tt Murray & Lanman's FLORIDA WATER possesses in a vola tilirej state a greater ability and power to purify the air than 'Eau. lie Convene'; and in this respect Murray & Lanman's FLORIDA WATER is fa -preferable to the well-known Col'igne Waters." No.Cl'M Sept. 30th, 1SS0. Hi if wr , JUST ARRIVED VZ& BABK Eackfeld, from London -BEST- Fence Wire, Galvanized Buckets, Best Coir Matting, 2Tror Sale at Lowest Trices by"Sl &, W. Macfarlane & Co. 1J0 tf rSHZS PACIFIC ' OIHIUBfCI I IS Leading JOtaily JSTcwspapor IN (Except BY HAWAIIAN Subscription, Or 50 Cents Delivered THE ADVERTISER Represents the Interests of the Tolitician, the Merchant, the Planter, the Storekeeper, the Lawyer, the "Workman, and, in fact, all Classes of the Community. THE ADVERTISER Has for many years been noted for its Reports of Legislati Proceedings, Important Law Cases, etc. These are recorded Verbatim when the importance of the occasion warrants it. THE ADVERTISER Is a necessity to Every English-speaking" Inhabitant of the Kingdom who desires to keep pace with the times. THE ADVERTISER Is copious and prompt in the publication of Local News, and its readers are kept constantly posted as to the course of events in other parts of the world, particularly in the United States. Address- HAWAIIAN GAZETTE CO., H. M. WHITNEY, Manager, Ilonolulu, n. I. Advert THE THE ISLAITD3 -:o:- Sunday.) THE GAZETTE CO -o- 6.00 per Annum per iVTontli by Carrier.