Newspaper Page Text
THE PACIFIC COMMERCIAL; ADVERTISER, HONOLULU, NOVEMBER 30, 1904
WAXTEE G. SMITH,. EDITOB.
: NOVEMBER 30
THE LEVITY OF THE LAW.
-Old Father Antic, the Law." must.
In the nature of things, have his
humorous moments. Usually, how
ever, he gets somebody ai the bar,
rather than on the bench, to express
them for him. The wit and humor of
the bar is proverbial, but the bench
has a reputation for solemn dignity
-which even keeps the cartoonists at
bay. There are times, however, when
-even Jove laughs and when the man
In ermine unbends and adds to the
harmless " gayety of the populace as
Witness these extracts, printed in the
American Law School Reporter from
decisions of State Supreme Courts:
is nothing certain -
law suit except
the expense 01
In the Happy Hunting Ground there
are no corporations, as they have no
souls, and consequently no hereafter."
"It is needless to make the speech
v. v, Ma is weak." "Those
long uetauic i.- -
-who shoot at their friends for amuse
ment ought to warn them first that
mere sport." "The first exercise
of mechanical Ingenuity was
manufacture of fig-leaf aprons."
policeman Is only a citizen dressed in
blue clothes and brass buttons,
nni t- a Tint sufficient that
knows a thing, but the record must
show it " "A man does not marry a
woman for the mere pleasure of pay
ing for her board and washing." "A
policeman is an excellent judge, of
whisky, and when he ha3 tasted liquor
he is able to say whether it is whisky
or not.". "It is libelous for a telegraph
.company to' transmit the following
message: 'Slippery Sam, Tour name Is
pants (Signed) Many Republicans.'"
"A husband is not guilty of desertion
-when his wife rents his room to a
boarier and crowds him - out of , the
house "A man is not a habitual
drunkard merely because occasionally
he gets to feeling good." "The quality
cf the advice of counsel may be such
as to warrant the presumption that it
was obtained gratis." ; "Lawsuits are
frequently ended without having de
termined anything except, possibly,
the cbsts." "A locomotive and a mule
may well pass over the same ground,
jso that they pass at different moments
of time:" "Woman has always been a
favorite, with equity, and it always
throws its willing arms around her."
"He who attacks with a double-barrel
sun may be resisted Just as if he shot
.with a. single barrel." "When a wom
an passenger says she was injured in
the attempt by a railway company to
pass one car by another upon a single
track, the railway company will al
ways have to vay for-it." "It is not
ground for a new trial that the jury
in a murder be se were taken to church
and allowed to hear a sermon on the
subject of Doubting Thomas." "No
man's life, liberty, or property are safe
' -while the legislature is in session."'
The "sweat box" method of wrest-.
in rnnfcsRlnns ' from Drisoners is
sharply condemned by the Supreme
Court of the Territory. It is a varia
tion f rem . the old thumb-screw and
rack devtcfj pf the Spanish inquisition
and is nicely calculated to make a man j
confess to anything rather than stand
the punishment. A searching inquiry j
into what is known as the "third de
gree," a discipline used upon the mur
derer of President McKinley to make
him reveal the names of accomplices,
If he had any, ought to be made by
the humane societies. From all indi
cations it is a relic of mediaeval bar
baiism. ""' ;
Gen. Gripenberg had a stroke of
apoplexy on Nov. 12, on hearing of the
death of his son, at the front. This
will compel a change In the command
of the Russian second army, which
was expected to operate with Kaul
hars' first army, under the general
control of Kuropatkin. Gen. Gripen
berg is a man of advanced years.
, ' 1 ; :
Sir Thomas Lipton will not challenge
for the cup in 1903 and no substitute
is in sight. A new British designer,
Alfred Mylne, will build a boat for
. f"J . n "
A Upton to try m ine nome in-ca
if the craft is speedy enough Mylne
may be employed to build a challenger
for the Tea King In 1506.
It is a pity that steps should have to
bt taken to prevent a free use of city
water. Enough mountain water goes
to waste to permit every citizen of
Honolulu to use all he wants. Im
pounded . it would keep all the taps
Fnr a brakebeam tramp. General
Coxey did very well to fail for S2S7.000,
He will now be more than ever the
envy of the hobo brotherhood, most
of whom would be glfid to fail for ten
If glanders has been here all the time
for twenty years as a contemporary
remarks, it speaks badly for the sys
tern of inspection.
A GOOD MAN GONE.
The late James Kekela was a man
whom his white brethren delighted to
honor one who chose a noble and self
sacrificing part in life, who did not give
it up when hardships came and death
threatened and who died as bo had
lived, a sincere Christian gentleman.
The story of Kekela's like reads in !
some chapters like a lurid romance, be
cause it was made up of adventures
among pirates and cannibals; and in
other chapters like the testimony ct the
saints, for Kekela gave many years to
helping the degraded heathen at rtek of
all the natural man holds dear. There
is a chapter, too, which connects this
old missionary with Abraham Lincoln.
from whom Kekela received giiis and
Hawaiians have many great mn Oi.
whom they boast, but the career of no
Pan among them has demonstrated
higher racial qualities or done more to
encourage those who expect much of
the native people than that of James
- : ;
Inquiry as to where the "Govern
ment buildings" stand which are illus
trated in the Nordhoff article on Ha
waii now running in the Sunday Ad
vertiser, develops the fact that they
never existed at all. A design was
spnt mi from Australia which, when
. , . vn
Mr. Nordhoff was first here, the public i-
supposed would be adopted. In using
it Mr.' Nordhoff thought he w as merely
anticipating results. Afterwards the
Government compromised on the pres
ent Judiciary building.
Submarines will have a thorough
test when the Baltic fleet approaches
the Far East. Japan has five or more
and Russia report;! the arrival of two
at Vladivostok. The existence of these
hidden destroyers is bound to make
naval fighting somewhat more circum
spect. Very likely warships will move,
while In a battle, with great speed and
never so as to go over the same course
twice, the object being to evade the
slew-moving submarines and discon
cert them ':. " '
Just as the Japanese get Into shape
to make the harbor of PoVt Arthur un
tenable, Admiral Togo's chief block
aders draw off. The obvious purpose
is to lure the Russian fleet to destruc
tion. When Togo's big fighting ma
chines disappear, leaving but a few
scouts in front of Port Arthur, the
chances are that they have simply
hidden in the fog awaiting wireless
tips about the movements of the
One of the things the big island
ought to acquire are Concord stages,
such as were . used in early days to
cross the the plains and to traverse, the
mining regions, of California. The
Hawaii stage Is little better than an
express wagon. Riding in a Concord,
even over a rough road, is a physical
pleasure which redeems travel in a
broken country from its worst discom
. r y .
The Dalai Lama of Thibe has arriv
ed at Peking from Lhasa, whence he
escaped as the British approached'.
Th-3 Buddhist pontiff is now resting:
in a Chinese Lamasery. The news Is
current that nobody of any conse
quence signed the treaty with Great
Britain and ;that when the Lama re
turns in the Spring he will ignore it.
- Italy has refused to let the cruiser
division of the Baltic fleet coal on the
coast of her Red Sea possessions.
England is less-scrupulous, as British
colliers are waiting with supplies for
the Russian vessels all along the way.
A nice international q iestion has al
ready grown out of this apparent ,
breach of neutrality.
A "Voice from the Vanquished.
Missouri's gone republican. There ain't
much more to say.
Tm waitin' now to see the world turn
. 'round the other way.
Considering what has happened, 'twon't
surprise me in the least
To see the sun rise in the west instead
of in the east.
I half expect to see the sky come down
and rain ascend
There really ain't no tellin where the
thing is goin' to end.
I can't find proper language for ex-
pressin! my dismay;
Missouri's gone republican. There ain't
much more to say.
It isn't any wonder that my courage
kind o fails;
'Twas hard when West Virginia went
a-waverin' in the scales,
Twas even worse to realize the music
of the band
Took on a special meanin when it
played "My Maryland."
But when you start a-tumblin', why,
there aln t no way to tell
Just when you finally have reached the
bottom of the well.
one em leunessee an' Texas to in
crease the strange array
Missouri's gone republican. There ain't
much more to say.'
Colonel Henry Watterson, of Ken
im-ivy, reveniiy tola a Story of an old
darkey down South who was informed
that if he was bitten by a snake and
uia"8' quart oi wnlsky the snake
would die and he would go unscathed
iJar s only one trouble 'bout dat cure
me oia man said; "I knows whar dere's
nlentv anoVQ i
' ; ., urn. nuars i gwine ter
S'i ae wnisky?"
Secretary Morton will at its coming
session ask Congress to pas an act
increasing the commissioned and en-
i listed force of the navy. This increase
in the naval force is regarded as es
sential by the department, as it is
shown by estimates recently prepared
that when all the ships now building
for the Navy Department are commit
sioned it will take about 20S7 officers
and 62,368 enlisted men to man them,
more than double the number now au
thorized by law.
Owing to the lack of officers and en
listed men in the navy to meet the
actual needs of the service it has been
found necessary for the Navy Depart
ment to order at least three warships
out of commission in order to man war
ships whiclThave just been completed
and now waiting commission. The three
vessels to be put out of commission
will be selected from five which are
deemed the least necessary for further
active service at this time. The tenta
tive list consists of the cruisers At
lanta, Castine and Marietta of the
south Atlantic squadron and the gun
boats Newport and Bancroft of the
Caribbean sfiuadron. j
The vacancies on the stations made,
by the detachment of. three of the five
vessels named will be filled by the as-
slgnment of newer vessels about to be i
The subject is now un-
der cpnsideratioiiat the Navy Depart-
men and it is expected that the result
be announced In a few days.
nu ; iitfif.
A timely Suggestion. This is
th feeason of the"year when the pru
dent' and careful housewife replenishes
her isupply of Chamberlain's Cough
Remedy. It is certain to be needed be
fore the Winter is over, and results are
much more prompt and satisfactory
whet: it is kept at hand and given as
soon as the co-d is contracted and be
fore It has become settled in the sys
tem. In almost every instance a severe
cold may be warded off by taking this
remedy freely as' soon as the first indi
cation of the cold appears). There is
no danger in g-iving 'it to children for
it contains no harmful substance. It
is pleasant to take both' adults and
children like it. Buy it and you will
get the best. It always cures. Sold by
all Dealers. Benson, Smith & Co., Ltd.,
Agents for Hawaii. .
Is Now On
We have gathered together
many , plain, pretty materials,
both 'white and colored, and
have made price reductions
that will ensure, their quick
sale. ; ' - -
Not only are the prices' at
tractive but the goods .'.f'Ueni-.
selves are very dainty and tine.
Plain White Batiste, - width 2S
inches ; regular 15c. . Reduced to 10c.
Plain White Swisses, 30 inches.
. Reduced from 15c. to 10c; 25c. 5 to 6
yards for $1.00; 35c. to 20c; 40c to
25c. ' - '
White Dotted Swisses, width 27
inches. Reduced from 25c. to 15c.
Mercerized Chambray, width 27
inches. Reduced from 30c. to 12c.
Plain French Batiste, width 4C
inches, in light blue, pink, red and
black. Reduced from 30c. to 20c
Plain French Organdies, in pink,
blue, red and yellow. Reduced from
30c to 15c.
Dotted Swisses, of Nile green, red
pink and light blue. Reduced from
30c. to 15c.
Plain Batiste, width 40 inches;
colors: red, pink, light blue, green.
Reduced from 6 yards for 51.00 to 8
ya.rds for $1.00.
NOTICE TO THE PUBLIC.
We -the undersigned barbers doing
business in the City of Honolulu, Terri
tory of Hawaii, do hereby agree that
from and after the fourth day of De
cember, 1904, that we will not open our
shops for business on Sundays:
SILENT BORBER SHOP. .
By Joseph Fernandez.
CRITERION BARBER SHOP,
By H. L. Ficke.
WAVERLEY BARBER SHOP,
; By C. A. Bidinger.
CLUB BARBER SHOP,
By H. Jeffs.
HAWAIIAN HOTEL BARBER SHOP,
By C, Hummel.
IMPERIAL BARBER SHOP,
By W. F. Helm. 6963
Honolulu Concrete Dray Co. ;
Builders of cement and stone build
Ings. Have for sale white and black
sand. Monument, foundation and coral
stones, ballast for ships: We also do
grading and excavation and have gar
den soil for sale. Hauling at reasonable
rates. Office: Emma Hall, Nuuanu and
Beretania streets. Phone Blue 1211.
We will soon have ready for in
spection the finest assortment ever
brought to this city. . '
Porter Furniture Co.
J$n , Jincient Foe
i o neaitn ana Happiness is bcroi-
ula as ugly as ever since time
It causes bunches in the neck,
disligures the skin, inflames the
mucous membrane, wastes the
muscles, weakens the bones,- re
duces the power of resistance to
disease and the capacity for re
covery, and develops into con
sumption. "A bjicb appeared on the left side of my
ceck. It caused great pain, was lamtd.
and became a running sore. I went ii.to
general uecUne. I was persuaded to try
Hood's Saroapariila. and when I bad taken
Bix bottles my neck was healed and I' have
never had any trouble of the kind since."
Mrs. K. T. Snyder. Troy. Ohio.
"Will rid you of Scrofula, radically
and permanently, as they hays
j Heptol Split if
& " ' : ' ' t
k The most ideal LIVER, $
STOMACH and BOWEL RE-
9- GULATOR and TONIC BEV-
S ERAGE. f g
s. ; Effervescing. Palatable and 2
gtiaranteed harmless. It will im- S
v mediately relieve and cure Bil-
liousness, Constipation, Indiges-
tion and ' Headache from any 2
cause, overindulgence in eating,
annking or smoking.
A HEPT0L SPLIT
Occa?ion,.11v fiefnrp KrMlrfact nr
other meals insures good health.
Directions: Contents of one
$ i TTFSV IT
Price 15 cts. See our window
? display. r
I fiollister Drug Go
f .. AGENTS.
DIE STAMPING '
We are now prepared with as
fine a plant as can be found any
where, to execute all orders for
Wedding Invitations and
Reception and Ball
At Home Cards ;
Visiting Cards, etc., etc.
A fine line of
SILL 'COBRESPOIDEICE PAPER
has just been added to this de
partment which consists of the very
latest styles in paper and envel
opes. In all work in this department
we use only the finest stock that
can be procured.
Call and ask to see samples of
Estimates furnished upon request
H. F, WICMS fi CO., LTD,
, are easily repaid by
, just like
when money i j obtained from
' Judd Building, Honolulu
Guarantee Capital, $20o.ooo.oa
Paid in Capital, $1,300,000.00.
HENRY E. POCOCK,
HORSE SHOEING I
W. W. Wright Co., Ltd.
have opened a horse-shotmjf department
in connection with their carriage shop,
etc. Having secured the services of a
first-class shoer, they are prepared to do
all work intrusted .to them in a r st
ela ts manner.
ye Have Scoured the Market
7? ,9V i r H
finish, style and fit are the goals thev have won'to, and the ' merchant
tailor whose skill can equal them will have the right to charge what
most of us can't afford to pay.
We have a complete assortment of these STEIN-BLOCH .
SMART CLOTHES and have them ready to be worn home. We
Fit You in a Minute. . . ' .
"He is happiest "be
Who finds comfort
If you spend these long winter evenings in your home,
whether at cards, chess, conversation or reading, the great
est comfort is afforded by incandescent electric lights. .
Hawaiian Electric Co., Ltd.
S- . ; .
Office King near Alakea. Phone Main 390.
g,1,Vhn,.r, : L ,,.,!..t,,i... ; ,, - jjij , j-. ,f ,liri 'inmj ,i aY,, tf17TTjZ: V' . HOP
j.r..i. 1 B 1 . 1
" -in, wltM
Fresh by the Alameda
American Biscuit Company's Biscuits, Chocolate Fig Bars,
Brandy Snaps," Cupid Chocolate Wrafers, Cupid Assorted Wafers,
Ginger Squares, Peach Cream, Washington Cakes, Christmas Mixed
Cakes and Vienna Creams, Lowney's Bonbons and Marshmallows
and all kinds of fresh vegetables.
All received "fresh
Telephone Blue 251 1.
Also just arrived a Fresh and New Supply of the Popular
CRYSTAL SPRINGS BUTTER.
rietropolitan Meat Co., Ltd.
Telephone Main 45.
It 1 1 iifijtili qutla
It is a pleasure to use
PACHECO'S DANDRUFF KILLER.
It keeps the hair light and fluffy, and
it insures cleanliness and freedom from
Sold by all Druggists and at Union
Barber Sh'on. Tel. Main
Fort Street, opposite Star Block.
.ADIES' AND GENTS' CLOTHINC
CLEANED AT LOWEST
Pkonc White 236a.
Service clothes so
FORTY YEARS OF KXOW
IXG HOW is sewed into them
and the men who make them are
masters of their craft. Quality
AND FORT STREET
king or peasant
his own home."
Telephone Blue 25 11.
The Expert Dentist
For Honest Work at Low FTiMa.
F. L. FERGUSON, D. D. CL
No. 215 Hotel Btreet. in front of Ttug
Choice- Potatoes and
Phone White 3231.
PANTS! PANTS! PANTSl
at popular prices.
GLOBE CLOTHING COMPANY
Hotel Sw near Bethel ' j
and can find