Newspaper Page Text
J ENCOURAGING TEDDY
jj By Cosmo Hamilton 8
'Copyright, Uifi, by Joseph U. Howies.)
When two women are Bitting over ,
n Blowing fire In the broad daylight,
nnd one Is mnrricd niul tho other Is
not, they Invurlnbly talk of two things
dtcss and sorvnnts, Hut when tho
light has waned, and the glow of tho
tiro nils tho corners of the room with
dnnclng shadows, oven dress and
servants nro left, and the convotsntlon
Invarlnbly turns to the other great
stock subject, man.
"Of course, I didn't do It to bo 1
thanked; but I think you might have
murmured one little word of gratltudo
to mo for asking -Mr Carr down. I
mean, ordinary politeness requires
Bomo attention even from you."
Kvu looked up ut Mrs. Clutton from
n deep dell of hot coal which had been
formed between tho bars. 'Thank
. i . you," she said; and then, added, "for
Mrs. Clutton wan one of those long,
slight, tired women who ulwayit droBS
to perfection, nro never milled, never
different, who nro able to hurry while
appearing to dawdle, to be exceeding
ly annoyed without tho leant appar
ent effort, to laugh heartily without
making a sound, and to tulk with
great animation, without In any way
disturbing the undulating, velvety
drawl with which they arc born.
"You might talk to mo from now till
tho middle of next week," sho said,
"nnd then you couldn't convince me
thnt yon mo not glad that ho In hero."
A laugh sprang across Kvu'h face,
to bo Instantly hunted away by ft sigh.
"My dear Knld, I haven't the faintest
desire to prove that I am not hopo
IchhI)' In lovo with him Unfortunate
ly It Is known to everybody In this
world except tho man himself. And
tho nbsurdlty of tho whole thing
the tiling thnt makes mo feel like half
n tomato on u gridiron Is that ho's
Just as much In lovo with mo as 1
urn with him, nnd that's a very great
"I don't sco where the absurdity
comes In. If you aru both In lovo as
much as all thnt, why don't you mar
J ry him?"
Hull-tragically, half-comlcally, wholly
In tho manner so fnr as wo can guess
of a petulant uugel, Hvn sprang to
her feet, and Hinging her collection of
I cushions far and wide, commenced
dashing about tho room, greatly to Its
"Marry him! muiry hliul Don't t
want to jiiarry him? Isn't It my ono
ambition In lire to become tho wlfo of
' this silly, foolish, timid, wretch? It's
nit lino for you to sit there nnd say
(bono ensy, Insane things; but 1 en n't
run away with tho man, tan I? I
en n't buy n toy pistol, meet the poor
denr in n dark passage and shriek,
Mnrry me, or you die!' can I? I enn't
y chase him Into u conservatory, Hop or
' my knees, nnd cry, Teddy, I lovo you
with a lovo that is almost Indiscreet;
bo, oh, bo my husband,' can I, cuu I,
enn 1?" Kvu caught ono of tho cush-
t . Ions a beautiful kick, and sent It fly-
i ,- ng ngiiliist a whatnot.
"Not very well," said Mrs. Clutton.
"Hut shnll I loll jou what you can
nnd will do?"
"What?" cried Kva. eagerly.
"Smash, my picclnus china If you
kick cushions about llko that. . . .
The point Is, hnvo you given him any
1 ' encouragement?"
Kvn laughed the laugh of theater
scorn. "Kncourugeinent? Why, my
dear Knld, 1 have dona overythlng a
nlccly-brought-up girl ought to do,
and a good deal that sho oughtn't.
During thnt time, a matter of per
haps u mlnuto and a quarter Mrs.
Clutton had been thinking hard, al
though It would have been Impossible
to guess It from tho placid state or
Kva," sho said llnnlly. "have you
over noticed that plcturo painted on
the punol over (ho bookense, of a girl
sitting on an armchair with her eyes
cast down, and with her hands folded
meekly on her lap?"
"No." said Kva, "and If I had, what
on enith has sho to do with my hor
Mrs Clutton undulated on: "Tho
llguro of tho girl works on a hinge,
n-y. - nnd sonetimes when my husband had
got Int-o a boyish scrape mid wanted
to heat what his father said about It
to Ills mother, ho used to get his
sister lo pull the plcturo hack, and
sit in tho girl's place lo report to
nim whi't wont on. A dishonorable and
very lancinating proceeding. A chair
was planted behind tho plcturo In tho
next room, the floor of which Is on a
level with It, and in this kind of light
It was Impossible to tell tho dlfferenco
. , between tho real and the unreal girl.
. . Now, don't you think--"
' "ThlnV.I Think!" cried Kva. cov
ering tho permanently epiiel Mrs
Clutton with kisses, "1 should think
I do think. Oh, Knld, oit engineer!
You want mo to get Into the picture;
you want to bring Teddy here to see
my now jmrtralt; you want to lento
him to say to rno on u panel what
ho daren't say to me In tho flesh;
and thou, when at last ho cries: 'Oh,
darling, my beautiful piquant, little
beauty, I lovo you so, If only J could
screw up courage to ask you to bo my
wife! you want me to say: 'Teddy,
you Infant, I'm dying to be your
"How wonderfully well"
Ileforo Mrs. Clutton could gat any
further Kva mounted upon tho book
rase, had pushed back the panel, had
caught up n chair from a corner of
the llttlo room which could just bo
teen through the aperture, and In a
twinkling had become, for the first
time In her life, a quiet, meek llttlo
llguro with downcast eyes nnd folded
"How'h that?" she asked, through a
cascade of chuckles, "Aro jou cer
tain you can't seo my breathing? And
do ou think It matters If I blink
every now and then?"
"Certiiln. The unsteady flicker of
the fire In this dim light will make
any blinking seem quite natural."
"Knld" Kva looked down with sud
denly earnest yes "If everything
works well jou shall chooso what
ever you llko from my wedding pres
ents. . Sss-sh! There's Teddy
at tho door. I know It by tho way
ho clutches the handle."
Ten minutes later, nftcr Mrs. Clut
ton had quietly led tho conversation
from comic opera to tobacco, from to
bacco to Kva, and from that young
woman to tho new portrait of her
abovo tho bookcase, she asked
Teddy to excuse hor whllo Bhc went
to look for her little friend, and
left the room. Teddy had hit
back It tho plcturo as tho dooi
closed; but in the looking-glass over
tho llreplaco ho was amazed tc
sco a handkerchief flutter hastily up
to tho picture's nose, and flutter at
hastily back ngnln amazed, Infinitely
worried, nnd full of wonder.
During tho first qunttcr of an hour
he stood with Ills back to her, gaz
ing at her In tho looking glass. From
tho corner of her eye, Kva watched
him with a kind of tingling amuse
incut. Immensely Muttered at the
thought that even In tho presence nt
hor iortralt a mero thing of oils
he should Ftlll bo bashful nnd difft
dent. The Btrcngth of his love routtl
"Ohl" She Cried Aloud, Suddenly.
ho enormous! In a moment or two,
sho argued, ho would realize thnt she
was meiely u picture, and conio nnd
hiatal underneath her to examine
more closely tho wonderful fidelity
of tho pot trail, the exquisite skill ol
the artist; and then, knowing thnt
sho could not hear anything ho said,
ho would utter aloud all those burn
lug words he had bottled up so long
In a moment or two . . .
Keeling hot all over, his densu head
In n whirl, certain only thnt Kvn
had got Into the plcturo in order to
mal.o a fool of him. Teddy sat down
In the chair by tho llto to try to
trausfoim the chaos of his brain Into
something itpprouchlug order
Dining the next hour ho lemalned
motionless, not looking once In tho
illiecllou of tho plctuie. To him, tho
hour was a minute To her. sitting
In the t-iimit attitude, hardly breath
Ing. hanlly thinking, getting more und
moio huiigr). the hour seemed n
week, a vonr, an eternity, Shu made
up her mind that when ho did think
aloud sho would snap her Ilngms In
his face and tell him. In scalding, hit
ter words, that she loathed him, and
that sooner than marry liliu she
would dlu a thousand deaths.
"Good gracious! There goes tho
gong for dinner! Oh, how awful, bow
liorillilo' What will they think? . . .
Idiot! Cicuttno! Why . . . wh . . .
Oh!" she cried aloud suddenly, for
getting everything under tho Inllu
enco of crump. "Oh, oh!"
Teddy sprung across the room.
'What's tho matter? What's tho
Desperately concerned. Teddy stood
upon n chair, lifted Kva down from
the picture with tho Iiiiro gentleness
of a six-foot thice man, (dared her
teudeily In a chair, and knelt ut her
feet. Her eyes were closed. He
wus certain she was dying. "Kvu,
my llttlo darling, open your eyes!
It's me. tho man who loves you mora
than all the world" lis grammar
became ehitky, his heart stono, his
breathing cyclonic. "Kva, my sweet
heart, my beloved, look at me, If
only for u moment, and tell me before
you dlu that you will bo my wife"
Of course, with tho change of po
sition tho cramp had gone, and Kva
knew that those symptoms were
snares. She sal up coldly. "I havo
no Intention of dying," sho said; "and
of course I will bo your wife. Hut
I think you aro the most abject per
son It hs ever been my misfortune
to meet. . . . Yes, of courso I love
you, dourest Teddy, but think, think
what you havo made me suffer. The
gong libs rung and you don't know.
' never will know how frightfully hup
' s;ry I um."
ATTORNEY GENERAL GOES TO SUPREME BENCH
Tho appointment of Attorney General (William 11. Moody to tho place on
the 8uprcmo court left vacant by tho retirement of Associate Justice Henry
II. Urown, has finally been decided on by ITw president.
TURNED HIM INTO A FREAK.
Young Man's Unfortunate Experience
With a "Hair Wash."
Then. Is a joung resident of tho up
per western section of tho town who
Is blessed with dignity beyond his
pnrs, and villi a sister wlioso years,
albeit these number hut lit, nro bo
jotid her common sense, says tho New
York Press One night, having mi
extra guest, and the sister being uway
at at seashore. Illnks occupied his sis
ter's room for the night. Discovering
on her toilet table it bottle marked
hair wash, and thinking that perhaps
his own not oei luxurlnn crop re
quired attention, he applied tho con
tents of the bottle liberally lo his
scalp locks, tubbing It In with thor
oughness, Tho following day, two hours before
nny business house opened its doors,
an Individual with a slouch hat pulled
down over his oars and having nil tit",
signs of dementia went speeding down
town on the subway express, Wild
nnd nnd Incoherent he sought the es
tablishment of one of tho Irest hnlr
dressers In town.
Ho has rotcutcd his visit to the
shop every morning since thnt tlmo
and the sHclallst Is slowly removing
SCHOOL TO BE ON HISTORIC GROUND.
Them Is one family In this country which Intends to ho a factor in its
civilization for nil lime to come. It has planned to establish a free school.
to which Its own members will havo prefutoucu over all other applicants
The endow mont fin this Institution amounts to ,0I0,000, The school is to h
situated near Windsor, t'onn., on tho ISU-nrru farm where Joseph (.omuls
the founder of the famll). onco lived III home, which ho built mrf lung
after the coming of the Mayflower, still stands, It Is snld to be the M-md
oldest house In the 1'ulied Wales, und will I preserved as n museum
liected with the school
by occult processes Known to his
trude, the brilliant gold streaks which
were so noticeable amid the Jetty
black of the lemaluder of tho coiffure.
Whom Could He Mean?
I happened lust evening to ho talk
ing politics with a physician a good
physician and one I trust, says a writer
In tho lloston Transcript Presently
he said: "Did ou ever hear of (I,
"Who's he?" I asked
"Oh," exclaimed the doctor. "0. P. I.
Isn't a Mililrlan, It's a disease gen
eral paralysis of the Insane"
Then he explained that the malady
begins with delusions of grandeur, that
the patient thinks himself great, that
he conceive enormous ambitions, un
dertakes colossal enterprises, displays
frantic energy. Only, he accomplishes
A Suspicious Character.
"Jimlnee! hut Mr. Hood, tho candi
date for county trousuit-r, is mud at
you," said the foicrnan of tho country
What' Why, we ga him ftgreat
send-off In this wpek's paper."
"Yes; he sa)s you've ruined him.
You referred to him us 'a trusted em
ploye" Catholic Hlunduid und
THEN HE STOPPED LAUGHING
' " i
WlfieY Simple Question Evidently
Hard One to Answer.
Five young men went Into n store to
buy n lint each.
Seeing they were In a Joking mood,
the clerk said, "Are you married?"
They each said. "Yes."
"Then III give n hat to the ono who
can tiuthfully say he has not kissed
nny other woman hut his own wlfo
since ho was married."
"Hand over a hat." said one of the
party Tvo won It."
"When wero yon married?"
"Yesterday." was the reply, nnd III
tint was bunded over.
Ono of the others was laughing
hcnrtlly whilst telling his wife the
Joke, hut suddenly pulled up when sho
"I say, John, how was It you didn't
M4va . ' . I
Pictured Hay Fever.
In Paris there Is Just now proceed
ing u sensonnblo ilh.ciisslnu on hay
fever, concerning which an amusing
Instance of the capricious nature of
the Infection Is related. A lady was
quite proof against catching the sneez
ings of hay fever from either ha) or
nny other flower or plant except one
The mero sight of a rose used to si t
her sneezing violently. Knowing hit
weakness shn carefully avoided thesr
flowers, hut one day she carelessl)
stopel before a still life painting rep
resenting a basket (if ruses. Almost
liistuntiy sho was seized with a sneer.
Ing fit Clearly Imagination has Itk
part In the case.
Ways of Bees.
There aro about 6,000 s'iles uf tho
wild bees, all with Interesting ways of
their own. Among tbmu Is a species
whoso females are ve,rltable Amazons
and cany moro nnd better weapons
than the males. These are the
"cuckoo" bees, which deiKinlt their
eggs In the nest of others, the progeny
of both living peacefully together un
til maturity, when they Boparate Tlven
thcro Is tho tailoring bee. which cuts
leaves with his sclssor-llko Jaws and
tits u snug lining of the leaf material
Into his cavo-shaped nest.
Why He Wanted Her.
Stopl" commanded Mist, Nurox.
with a disdainful sniff. 'The Idea of
your proposing to a lady la my sta
tlon of life. You ought to know
"Well"' icplled Mr. Hunter. J do
Imov better, but not rlclur"
FALLS 400 FEET I
INTO MINE SHAFT. I
YOUNG MAN HAS REMARKABLE I
ESCAPE FROM DEATH.
IS GIVEN UP FOR LOST
Cries for Help Finally Heard by One
of Rescuers and He Is Taken
Out with Not a Bone In
Pottsvllle. Pa Palling 400 feet
down an abandoned mine shaft, Jos
eph Schroeder of Pottsvllle was reH
cued alive, after he had been virtual
ly burled nil day and nil hope of IiIh
rescue abandoned When examined
It was found Schroeder had not even
a broken bone It was the most ox
trnordlnur) escape known In tho his
tory of anthracite mining.
Young Schroeder left town In com
pany with William Kalbacli, to shoot
pheasants. While pushing their way
through tho brush toward tho moun
tain top Schroeder took tho lead. Ho
walked Into a drift, lighted a match,
nnd called to Kalhach to follow, Sud
denly ho gave n cry of surprise and
attempted to step back, but tho
ground nt the edge of a hole gavo way
with him, nnd ho plunged feet first
down Into an abyss.
Knlbnch hurried forward and ho,
too, almost plunged down tho holo
after his companion. Had he dono so
tho mystery of their dlsnppearanco
probably never would hnvo been
Seeing he could be of no aid to his
unfortunate companion. Knllmch start
ed down tho mountain for Mlddlcport
on the run, and In n short tlmo a
dozen men accompanied him linck
with long lengths of rope They went
ns close as they possibly could In
safety und culled down the shaft.
Nothing but the echo of their voices
greeted them Then they tied a
weight to the end of n rope and low
ered It can-fully into the black pit It
struck several times along tho side of
tho Jagged opening but lluall) It was
lowered to Its full length, hut the hot
torn had not been reached
Men were sent buck to town for
more rope, mid when they came hack
tho attempt was again made, but
again tho end of the rope failed lo
WHALE PILOTS VESSELS
THROUGH FRENCH PASS
'Pelorus Jack" Meets Steamships Go
ing to New Zealand and Takes
Them Under Protection.
Auckland, New Zealand --Pelorus
Jnck U tho name of the oddest lit lot In
thn world. For lf eais ho has piloted
I every steamship g tug tlnoitgli tho
French pass to the port of Nelson,
New Zealand, with one exception. Pel
orus Jack Is a gu-at whllo llsli some
HI feet long, the onl.v one of the kind
ever seen In that part of tho world,
and a species not curelv determined
by the IIkIi sharps Some say ho Is a
ZIphliiK, or while whale, others main
tain that lie Is an albino of the ocrn
species, known to anii-n as the
Whatever iiiuy be his scleutlllc
nntne. all New- Xea'.mders know Pel
I - . v
1 He Meets the Incoming. Vessels ana
Pilots Then Into the Harbor,
1 orus Jack, and undi r that name hu Is
, protected bj a spiclai uct of parlia
ment. Some one shot at htm once, and
New Xeuland uroto In Indignation anil
demanded that parliament take the
pilot of French pass under Its partlc
I ular protection.
When Pelorus Jack hears, or other
I wises senses, the throbbing of a screw.
he puts out from Pelorus koiind to
French pass, and meets the steamship,
i and for several miles he pla s around
I her bows' and dliorts hlrnielf as If ho
were pleased to m-c the ship und
I everybody on board.
I That is. unless the .hip happens to
, ho the I'rilon company's Penguin.
Jack will have nothing to do with the
Penguin, and he seems to know her at
a distance. One day ho was piloting
tho Penguin through the pass, and
getting too clotc in crossing her bow
ho received an ugly blow from hor
sharp sterft thn mark of which he car
ries on his side to this day.
1 Why Pelorus Jack accompanies
tblps through rnch pact, nobody
reach bottom Messengers were dl- H
patched to the collieries at Kasknnnd H
I Stiver ftcck whence experienced
mining men were sent by olTlcial ,
with a long coll of stout rope. This H
was lowered and. although 200 fret of .H
It was used, the bottom of the shaft H
could not be touched Not a sound H
came from tho black hole, except tht B
rattling of the weighted ropo. H
Again messengers were dispatched M
I for more rope. The boy's father also M
Young Schroeder Plunged Down Four M
Hundred Feet. M
nrilvcd, accoinpnnlcd by several ein- H
plnycs of the shops One of them. H
John Calloway, was lowered Into the 'H
opening, and after going down 200 yH
feet ho heard cries for help iH
1 Calloway was then hoisted to the H
surlace, where he related his illscov- H
cry. lo the great Joy of the hoy's fath- JH
or. Calloway uvuln went into Hie '.H
shaft, this ilme at the end of n rope M
more Hum 100 feet long. He found 'H
' young Schioeder ut tho bottom of the iH
J pit nnd was drawn to tht suifnce with H
li I in Schioeder was terribly bruised H
' and shaken, but no tames were bro- H
1 ken, and li will tecover. i H
knows, The Maoris say that once up- Ct
on a time there was a pilot who wick ' 'i
edly and treacherously ran n ship U- b H
on the rocks and wrecked bur, destiny - , , , jflB
lug llio lives of tunny mariners. When iHrBasi
the wicked pilot died, his soul wns IH
not permitted lo lly to the North cap H
nnd plunge Into the sea and Journey- 1H
to lliiwulkl. at do all good Maori souls.
it was sent Into the body of the great H
white lUh to do peuuaco und repara- H
tlon for a thousand years by piloting H
ships safely past the scene of his sin. H
WILL READ FUNERAL STORY. M
Unable to Attend Widow Will Get De. 11
tailed Report. H
Pasadena. Cal Ono of the most H
novel and yet weltd ideas on record H
has originated In the minds of Mrs. H
I'M ward II Hclmau. widow of the man H
killed In the collision Inside the Pasa- H
denu Klcclrlc Kxptcsx building, anil H
some of her fi lends. H
It Is nothing mine nor less than a H
full slioithaiid and doscilptlvo report H
of the f unci ill of Helmun. This re-
pott Is to be clone alter the fullest und
most appi oved newspaper methods
und the widow Is to lecelvo u copy of
It for pioservatlon. H
The friends do not plan to have the
report appear In the ncwpunr. It iH
Is designed simply for the eyes of iafl
Mis llolman M
Mrs. HeliiiMii Is In dellcuto coudl- M
tlon Fearing the effects of u funeral, M
she will not atiend the service.
The man In chiiigo of the reporting H
urrangemeuts Is to furnish a stenngru- H
pher to take down verbatim the funer- M
al udilicsH of lliiv Albert Smith, while M
it ilcscilpllvo writer will iloscillio (ho M
scene nnd service us accurately its pus- iH
SLEPT FOR EIGHT DAYS. H
First Declaration of Injured Man Wat, H
"I'm Hungry." M
Cleveland. O." Oct so Cornells H
Shaw, a mull clerk, whlso home U lb i
this lily, bus uwMkoned (loin an jfll
elghtduy sleep In Chester. Oeangi. K
He had iM-eu testing at tho farm of SM
a lelallvo for several daH prov Iiiiih to 'inM
Ills long sleep, on the advlco of lis tM
physicians, to recuperulo from Hie ef- H
feels of Injuries he hud sustained In iH
a railroad wieck Ho had been throw i, H
against a IhIiIo, unit hud sutTered m 1
veto Injury to his spine. H
Nine du)it ago lie was found tuleep H
In the barn of I- ll.illey, with whom M
he had Imcii slopping Ml efforts to H
arouse him were futile Tin it physl- H
clans tvorki-d on the case, finally H
uwukcnlng him eight days after ho iH
went In sleep H
When ho opened his eyes he t- H
dared he was hungry IB
Fear Undue Competition, J M
The proposal lo extend employment -I M
In the llrltlsh civil service to ox-t-ol- j M
dlers und sailors is bltlerlj opposed M
by labor 1 ciders The Tear In (hut M
such men will be disposed to accept ,
small pay In addition to any pent-lm, 'M
they ma hve . ul thus icduci.
I0&tmtlmr:r&1 tl 'Same I'Um W mimr-