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TUESDAY The San Francisco Call JOHN D. SPRECKELS Proprietor CHARLES W. HORNICK General Manager ERNEST S. SIMPSON Managing Editor Address All Commnaicatlons to THE SAX FRAJVCISCO CALL "Telephone, *^lrn»por«ry !»8" — Ask lor Titc Call. The Operator Will Connect Yon With the Department Yon \Vi»lj. BUSINESS OFFICE Market and Third Streets. San Francisco Open Until 11 O'clock Every Night In the Year. EDITORIAL ROOMS .»...» Market and Third Streets MAIN' CITY BRANCH ~ 1651 rillmore Street, Near Post OAKLAND OFFICE: — 101$ Broadway Telephone Oakland 108 S ALAMEDA OFFICE— I4SS Park Street Telephone Alameda 559 — — — — BERKELEY OFFICE — SW. Cor. Center and Oxford. .Telephone Berkeley 77 CHICAGO OFFICE — MarQuette 81dg...C. George Krogness, Representative NEW YORK OFFICE — 20 Tribune Bldg. . .Stephen B. Smith, Representative \u25a0WASHINGTON CORRESPONDENT Ira K. Bennett SUBSCRIPTION' RATES Delirered by Carrier, 10 Cents Per Week. 75 Cents Per Month. Single Copies 5 Cents. Terms by Mail, Including: Postage (Cash With Order): DAILY CALL (including Sunday). 1 year \u0084.$B.OO DAILY CALL (including: Sunday). 6 months.. - -.^..M.00 DAILY CALL— By single month • • 76 ° SUNDAY CALL. 1 year — ....—— 2.50 WEEKLY CALL. 1 year ~ 10 ° r D a iiy \ 18.00 Per Year Extra FOREIGN ) p an d"ay" .'.".' *- 16 Per Year Extra POSTAGE. ( weekly.. 1 *- 00 Par Tear Extra Entered at the United "States Postofflce as Second Class Matter. ALL POSTMASTERS ARE AUTHORIZED TO RECEIVE SUBSCRIPTIONS. Sample Copies Will Be Forwarded When Requested. Man subscribers In ordering change of address should be particular to give both NEW AND OLD ADDRESS in order to Insure a prompt and correct compliance with their request. THE JOYOUS BOSS IN DURANCE RUEF is cheerful, even jocular. He exhausts the potentialities of song and humor in aid of a stiff upper Jip. "Stone walls do not a prison make, nor iron bars a cage." His durance is not vile, but is attended by all the modern conveniences. The prisoner of the St. Francis does not languish }n a dungeon. He is nourished on pate de foie gras and truffles, or their equivalent, but all these cates and frills may not obscure the fact that he is a pris oner. His cage is gilded, but the bars are there. Not yet does his portrait appear in the rogues' gallery, but he is on his way. But yesterday Ruef was boss. Today there is none so poor to do him reverence — unless it might be his man, the companion of his flight, Myrtile Cerf, who was eager to engage the whole Grand Tury and all the minions of the law in personal combat, a warrior singled from the stews. It may be that the argument of fists is the last resort available for Ruef and his heelers. There is, for instance, Mr. S. M. Shortridge, usually the most peaceable and respectable of citizens, albeit troubled with a flux of language, Mr. Shortridge appears to have fallen among thieves, and suffers by the association. Evil communications corrupt good manners. So says the copybook moralist. Mr. Shortridge should take heed and warning, for, in truth, he conveys a great moral lesson for the first time in his life without saying a word. Just watch him busy trying to keep out of jail and wearing a muzzle for self protection. Too late comes repentance. Like his famous prototype, he talked too much. It is reported from Sacramento that Ruef's gang of assorted disreputables in the Legislature is meditating some sort of grotesque foray intended to blacken Judge Dunne and whitewash Judge Heb bard. The tale is scarcely credible, but it is to be hoped that they may try it. It would be quite of a piece with the silly and impotent tactics that have characterized the defense of Ruef, which, in fact, has been no defens^ but merely a continuing process of evasion that reached its logical conclusion in flight- The verdict of a crew of political blacklegs, delivered between intervals of robbing the State henroost, would simply be read backward. Most of them will be lucky if they keep out of jail. It is timely to offer a humble suggestion that the Legislature before adjournment get together and deliver a certificate of good, moral character to Ruef. It is never too late to mend a reputation with a splotch of mud. It is right to hold the shifty boss in custody. Like his evasive exemplar, George D. Collins, he became a fugitive from justice on the eve of trial. He sees the same fate before him, and may shortly be competing with Collins for the law business of his cellmates. But he should not neglect the opportunity of the dying session to bring forth a counterblast from the Legislature. A verdict from that body on the morals of the judiciary would at least promote the gayety of the commonwealth and make the ten commandments THE PONDERABLE SOUL THE researches of certain Boston doctors who claim to have ascertained the weight of the human soul should be regarded as another triumph of science — if you believe the doctors. -Dr. Duncan MacDougall, who conducted the experiments in com pany with four otfier physicians, describes the process ofr weighing the soul. The consent of the moribund subject was not obtained, apparently, and it may be that the subsequent proceedings interested him but • little. Dr. MacDougall's account of one experiment runs thus: Four other physicians under my direction made the first test on a patient dying with tuberculosis. This man was one of the ordinary type, of the usual American temperament, neither particularly high-strung nor of marked phlegmatic disposition. We placed him, a few hours preceding death, upon a scale platform that I had constructed and that was accurately balanced. Four hour,s later, with five doctors in attendance, he died. The instant life ceased the opposite scale pan fell with a suddenness that was astonishing — as if something had been suddenly lifted from the body. Immediately all the usual deductions were made for physical loss of weight, and it was discovered that there was still a full ounce of weight unaccounted for. question then arose as to what the loss meant. It v was a loss of substance that could be, obtained in known figures, and was also such a singularly appreciable loss as to place it beyond all doubt that it might be due to any error in calculation. All this makes a very odd and suggestive revelation of the scientific attitude. Having sentenced the patient to death without inconvenient. delay tliey put him on one end of the scales to weigh his soul as he gives up the, ghost t Fiat experimentum corpore vili. The dying man was just so much material for research and nothing more. Admitting the truth of the change, in weight, they have proved nothing about the soul. Its existence remains as much as ever a matter of faith and wonder, not of proof. But as for these doctors, it is doubtful if they have an ounce of soul among all five. of them. YOUNG-MAN-IN-A-HURRY T>v ANGEROUS are the uses of impetuosity m the digging of I 1 rcanals. Dr. Roosevelt chose a kindred soul in Chief Engineer I / Stevens, another Hotspur, who would make the tropics sizzle and the dirt take wings. That was very well and well planned, but—}. Mr. Stevens, like the President, is impatient of restraint and resentful under criticism. All manner of Congressional busybodies began poking impudent noses into the conduct of operations at Panama, and then there came a question of taking the work out of the chief engineer's hands and giving it to a contractor, while EDITORIAL PAGE Stevens was to be nothing more than a looker-on, in receipt of salary. Now, Stevens wanted glory as well as pay. He hoped that His tory would point an admiring finger at him as the man who joined two oceans and subdued the turbulent tropics to his will. He wrote a message. It is a sovereign cure for the mental distemper, although it sometimes comes back hard at the writer. At any rate, Stevens felt better after he had written his message to the President. It was hot stuff, and although its text is withheld, the general tenor is known. The chief engineer wrote that in the preceding thirty days he had broken the record for digging, and he strongly objected to letting in *a mere contractor on the job. He would share the glory with none. Neither would he be dictated to or cross-examined by any committee of Congress, nor hampered by petty and annoying legislation by men who did' not know a shovel from a pickaxl Finally he told the President that his resigna tion was ready if his wishes were disregarded, and -this ultimatum was fraught with the implication that his retirement would be little short of a national calamity. Promptly came back the answer, "Resignation accepted." We trust the military gentleman selected to fill the place^ — we cannot pronounce and. with' difficulty spell his name, but we know he is a major — we trust that the major is not impetuous. We cannot afford to have more than one Hotspur on the job, unless we want it to cost a billion. A Boston editor of confiding temper, commending the selection of the army engineer corps to carry, on the work, allays our anxiety. He says "they are often accused of deliberation." Wherefore accuse? Say, rather, Well done, thou slow and faithful servant, who made the dirt crawl. "They are often accused of deliberation !" "La-la-la I What is slower than a seven-year ditch ? Why, the Panama canal, of course. INVITATIONS have been received here from Mrs. Edith Syle to the marriage of her daughter, Miss Elizabeth Blddle Syle, to Arthur Edward Madison on March 24 at noon In the Church of the Angels, Los An geles. Miss Syle Is the daughter of the late Professor L. Dv Pont Syle of the University of California, and Is well known here and In Berkeley, although of late she has made her home in Southern California. She Is a charm- Ing girl, clever and popular, and her friends are rejoicing with her and send ing the heartiest congratulations to Mr. Edwards as well. He is one of the rising young business men of Santa Barbara and it is there they will live. Mr. and Mrs. William G. Irwin, Miss Helene Irwin and Miss Julia Lang> homo, who went down last week to Coronado for the polo tournament, will stop a. few days at Santa Barbara on their way home this week. Mr. and Mrs. James Follis, who have spent the winter at the Hotel Rafael, expect to move into their beautiful new home In San Rafael about the end of this month. Mrs. Rosenstock and her daughter, Mrs. J. R. K. NuttalU left yesterday morning for New York, where they are called by the serious Illness of Mrs. Rosenstock's mother. They expect to remain In tbe East for a month or six weeks, although their plans are of necessity rather indefinite. Mrs. George Tllghman has arrived from Switzerland, where she had been for the past two. years, and will spend some « time here. Mrs. Hal Tilghman, who crossed with Mrs. Tilghman, did not come West, but Is at present « the guest of her brother-in-law and sister, Rev. and Mrs. Charles J. Mason, .in Stonington, Conn. Mrs. Marguerite Hanford expect* to Personal Mention | H. F. Bpenker of Goldfleld ; la at the Hamlin. Monroyd • Sharp*" of Santa Crua Is fet the Dorchester. / F. C Smith of Reno and bis mother are at the Majestic Annex. J. I* Bryson, with mining interests at Stent, Nev, li at the Savoy. W. Riedllnger of Jerex de la Fron tera, Spain, is at the ; Palace. George VT. Sill, a fruit grower of Watsonvllle, Is at the Majestic ; O. : P. Posey and his son. O. W. Poeey, of Goldflold are at . the Majestlo. J. O. Cummings'and wife />f Crank rook, B. C, are at the Hamlin. . -j.- h. Brlnceneld, . prominent. In ; real estate circles ' at \ Han ford., Is at "* the Savoy.'- I* Gerlingrer, & capitalist of Portlaad, Ore., accompanied by his family, is at the Palace. Smith Cttrwder. vice president and manager tit the Los Molinos Land Com pany. Is , at the ; St. Francis. \u25a0;,Rav. Father ThomastF. Cashman of Chicago - and : his sister, - Miss 1 Helena* Cashman, - are at - the* Doirchester. v . David D. Seerie ' and . his - brother, Peter ' Seerie," prominent in business cir cles . of ' Denver. at the; Hamlin. : James B. Brady,; familiarly known as "Diamond Jim". - Brady, of '\u25a0 the • Standard, Drifting The Smart Set leave In about two months for Canada, where she will spend some time visit ing relatives. 'Miss Ardella Mill* and Miss Eliza beth Mills returned yesterday from New York, where they have been dur ing the winter months. They came by way of New Orleans, spending a day or two there and Enjoying their leis urely, trip homeward greatly. The many friends of Mrs. R Walton Hedges will be delighted to hear that ehe has taken her pretty apartments on Broderick street for another month and will remain here until May 1. She will then go East to rejoin her family and will pass the summer with them on the Maine coast. It was hoped that Mrs. Hedges would decide to remain In the West during the summer months and there is much disappointment over her latest decision.. Mr. 'and Mrs. Charles Hammond have returned from Boston, where they had spent the winter, and have gone to their ranch In Lake. County. . . . Much sympathy is felt for, Mrs. Ed ward Polhemus, who has been quite 111 for the past week at her home in Clay street, and. although she Is now better. Is still far from well. \u25a0 - • -•-"* • •-• §^ Miss Rowena Davidson has sent out announcements of i the marriage of her daughter, Miss Florence Ethelberte Davidson, , to Brecklnrldge 1 David Marx Greene on Thursday, March 7, In Berkeley. They will be at. home after August -5 at Hill Top, Garber street, Berkeley. Mrs. H. M. A. Postley is expected to arrive from Santa Barbara for a; visit to her son-in-law and daughter. Mr. and Mrs. Ersklne Richardson, who have an attractive home on Walnut street. Mrs. Philip K. Gordon will return about the end of the week from a visit to- San Diego. • . ". In the Joke World Friend— You never had much trouble, did you? .•"\u25a0\u25a0•• \u25a0; \u25a0,-:.-_ '•' : "\u25a0^\u25a0i r j''~ : "- \u25a0 . Cynicj — No, that's it; I never get my share of anything.— Milwaukee Journal. Kniokor — Jones says he is a Yale man.' , .; -' .-'-./; \u25a0\u25a0\u25a0'" '.;\u25a0;, \{':T^ Bocker— Yes;- he never .went himself, 1 but hr© paid his son's way through^— New York Bun. - "Do you believe an : Infant that dies unbaptlzed'can : be saved?" .' / \u25a0 /•' ; "Urn; I dunno. What does Roosevelt \u25a0ay ' about ' UT^-^-Chlcago Record-Her ald. \u25a0' • \u25a0 \u25a0 :''.''\u25a0\u25a0' ~ '\u25a0• : : \u25a0 \u25a0\u25a0' \u25a0 : . " "How do you know that^strange doc tor you called In is, a bachelor?" ; • ; "Because he picked up aIK the mag azines that . were lying on the floor' and caref nlly< laid'. them on ' the table."~De trolt. Free, Press. ' ":' ; v Steel ; Company of New York, is at the Palace. : - '_'.:' '."\u25a0\u25a0" r :-"v.'- "-"•':\u25a0• »WV • ; '--\ H. L. Pittock, 1 . business ; manager and half i owner,, of ithe ' Portland lOregonian, is at the Jefferson" with. his '.wife.";- i They are on their way to Santa I Barbara. \>\ J. B. : Powles and -, wife} and \ daughter,' Miss .\u25a0 Olive I R. t Powles. tofj Seattle, Vwho have '.been l touring' SoutherrilCalifornia in*; their, automobile; ; 'are \u25a0 at] the Dorches ter on their way : northward. i_~i .\u25a0 •_ >. Gossip of the Doings of Railroad Men The northern part of the State Is re ceiving from the East about 1000 per sons a day, and If this ratio be kept up till the last day of April San Francis co, to which the majority of the trav elers are coming, will have a respecta ble addition to her population. The numbers that have been taking advan tage of the colonist rate is far in ex cess of that of other years and it is In teresting to note that the Northwest, which had quite a boom in population in-the last . two years, Is getting: but little patronage this year. The general offices of the Southern Paclflo give out the following figures for a single day — Saturday: Ogden 446, El Paso SOl, Portland 72, Los Angeles 7. These, with 129 reported by the Santa Fe, make a total of 995 persons, and this is the smallest number since the colo nist rate went Into effect on March L Monday morning reports from Oak land to the operating office of the Southern Pacific read like those of a general action. There are always some, killed and Injured to be reported, and it seems as though on the second day of the week men were more anxious to cross the path of speeding trains than on any other day. The summary yes terday was as follows: J. Southern, badly bruised and sent to the hospital; struck while crossing in front of a railroad train which was running at the rate of twenty miles an hour. 'Gee Up, Chinese, head cut and other wise bruised. Oee Up tried to cross In front of a moving train which was go ing 1 at the rate of eight miles an hour. , Thomas Fernando, left leg cut off be low the knee. He said he had no Idea the Southern Paclflo could move trains so rapidly. P. Murphy, trackwalker for the Southern Pacific ; . killed by Santa Fe extra, traveling at ; the rate : ; of thlry miles an hour. Murphy was dead when picked up. There was high 'water' at the foot of Broadway, Oakland, yesterday morning and several ladles and Carleton C. Crane objected to leaving the train at that station and swimming to dry land. By common consent Crane was selected as chairman of the- grievance commit tee to wait upon. Conductor Nutting and ask him to devise ways and means for the passengers to get ashore without being drowned. "Get a plank," said Crane, who was regarded as a whole life-saving crew. "Make fast the bow : line," he com mented, as Conductor Nutting placed the plank In position. "Let go there, aft," shouted Crane, and as he stepped on the plank It was deftly withdrawn. Had It not been for his athletic training he would have been, precipitated head foremost, Into the muddy pool "Did you ever see such a, lot of land lubbers!" remarked Crane, as ha gazed at the grinning trainmen.. Captain A. H. ; Payson ', returned on Sunday evening from , Santa Barbara, where he had been, as he explained, not on railroad > business, but to give President Rlpley his revenge at golf. Payson^again proved".' his prowess "by defeating Rlpley. . His success possibly was the reason - for -W. A, Blsseli hav ing left for Santa Barbara yesterday morning. Bissell. however. Intends to go as far as Los Angeles on business for the company. ... ' C. 13. E. Ussher, - assistant passenger traffic manager of the Canadian Pacific, arrived ' in ' this city yesterday and . will make .a . tour,' of ~ the \u25a0 coast before re turning to his home at Winnipeg. It is said* he will appoint a district passenger agent; with headquarters in this 1 city before leaving 'for the East _ A , meeting of the. Transcontinental Passenger Association is scheduled for May 8 at the Glenwood Tavern, River side. The passenger, agents- in : this city \u25a0 expect that the congress will be largely attended by the passenger traf fic officials throughout the oountry. ;\u25a0;'; Splllman J. Marks, who has been pas senger ; agent, in the Union f Paclfle*of flcea in . this :•: city '\u25a0 for three . years,' has been ordered to .. Los : An geles \u25a0as \ city passenger agent in that ; place. His position here; will , be taken \ by G. Lowry.V. - ' ... •» : ; H. ; ', P. Anewalt, ; '\u25a0-. assistant general freight I agent : . of -,the Santa ; Fe, . who has been' in Arizona and: the Southwest on business ' for the company, returned yesterday." . F^X. Jones, who has been the' general freight, and ;Jagent tof vthe Santa i Fe ' for ; many j, years J at ' Prescott, Ariz., has resigned to engage In private business 'and wi 1 1 b e succeeded . by Paul R. , Hastings,Twho '\u25a0 has ;been\ the f auditor of the Santa Fe,. Prescott and Phoenix. STERILIZING MILK fit Is reported l from. Paris that Prbfes^ sor 7; Behrinj? . \u25a0 has '] a ' new, method of. sterilizing milk 'without boll lng» it or . any s of ( its ; essen tial: principles. The method : ls based | on the! powerful qualities ', of j German iper-" phydrol;T simple 'oxygenated. 'xOne gram per riitre^ of J this : , substance, is sufficient to;' destroy • all "noxious" germs.' Milk thus 'i sterilized V can- '.bp /kept? a long .time.— Scientific ; 'American.'. ,' *• The Insider Discusses "Dick" Hotaling s pursuits m a theatrical way, the' thrift of a hard-headed hardware merchant and author's undoing 4 ... \u25a0\u25a0 - t t ad "Dick** Hotaling been born a poor .Wealth Robbed the I— j boy ins tead of an heir to millions he Stage Of a Star 1 1 wou ld have cwved out a career with fame and fortune embellishments for himself. He would have become _ an actor. But fate supplied him with the golden spoon which knocks ambition out of the desire box of the rich, and "Dick" had to content himself with breeding prize Holsteins on his Marin County ranch and occasionally satis fying- his appetite for dramatics by entertaining stage favorites at House parties or taking part in amateur theatricals. Hotaling is one of the stars of the Bohemian Club's amateur actors and he is about the best mimic in the club. He can take off every known singer, actor, actress or dancer m capital style. But it is not for this form of .distinction that the y°« n * millionaire sighs. He believes that serious acting, the legitimate and that sort of histrionics, is his forte. Therefore he wil{ see what he can do with "Samson," in which Salvini, the great, used to appear, and will give his friends 'the result, of his study of the role when the play is given tn the Greek Theater in Berkeley next month. There was a time when Hotaling's friends thought that he was gofa* to be very much more closely allied with the stage than through his amateur efforts. It was very solidly surmised that he was to wed Blanche Bates. When he gave a dinner in Miss Bates' honor the last time she was out this way it was expected that an engagement announcement would accompany the service of coffee and liqueurs. However, the guests were disappointed. The Belasco star went off to New York, via St. Lauis. A little later Hotaling followed, but he came back again, and his Intimates believed that he must have been refused by the charming actress. Then it was said that he intended to leave all his interests here and go to New York to live. Again rumor proved a falsehood, for Hotaling came back to town and took his usual part in a club jinks, making a hit as Yvette Guibert. He did not seem to be at all sad. The fact that ho Is to appear as Samson seems to prove that he ha* at least not lost interest in his old love, the drama, c- ir /-i»j *-• r v> -Mf preliminary home-teaching develops noth- SIX-Year-Old Girl ing P else in^ a child it at least stimulates Scored a Triumph memory. A six-year-old tot, the daughter of one of our foremost cits, was sent to the public school upon the term's, opening. ; She proudly informed her mamma on her return that she could "read better than Daisy, for* she has to look at the book, and I don't." n//,,,w h,™ rr»,t P There are way and ways of .accumulating Would Have Clerks Hcheg and thfi flame of San Frandscan is Hold Roof Down not a i way 3 aynonytnous with spendthrift. There is a pioneer stove and hardware dealer In our town whose losses in the fire, were not heavier than those of others. Indeed, he is on the high road to a greater financial prosperity than he enjoyed last year. A story about his thrift has come my way. *It was on the day of a recent storm. Tbe wind was blowing fiercely and the corrugated iron roof of his ware rooms showed signs of breaking loose and flying away. He suggested to a "handy man" about the place that he set about securing the roof into place. The man said that instead of makeshift he could make the roof fast with some nails of the right •kind. The man of wealth asked how many nails would be required, and the handy chap said that four bits' worth would do the whole job. "Oh," said the rich man, turning away as if the subject no longer inter ested him, "I guess some old boxes and barrels or waste stuff laid over the cracks will do. The wind will die down by and by, so it's nonsense wasting fifty cents. "Besides," and his face brightened as he made the suggestion, "if the blow gets much worse, some of you men might go and stand on the roof." Novelist Arnttses lt aPPearsa PP cars that picrre ti ha 3 « ot himself ivoveii?z arouses , nto quite a mea3 his btcst nOY^ « Dis _ Wrath Of Sultan enchanted." Loti is the French naval officer whose "Romance of a Spahi" and other works have placed him in the front rank of modern writers, and all his. works are said to be more or less biographical. "Disenchanted" relates the story of a certain French novelist who revisited Constantinople at the behest o£ a Turkish lady of rank and there surreptitiously made acquaintance with three harem favorites. He met them under various conditions, ' and the three paid for their pleasure In tragic deaths. The current Putnam says that Loti met in Constantinople a high Turkish official who introduced him to his three daughters. There was no intrigue about the matter, for the official was pleased to have his daughters meet such a. distinguished man of letters. Through these young ladies Loti met two others, who had been brought up in the European manner. One cf these was a Malaslan who had been educated in England, and she naturally found her position in a Turkish household extremely irksome, but there were none of the terrors with which the novelist invested his "Disenchanted." Loti and the ladies often met to talk over the material for his noveL and it seems that the two of European' education thought that they were to share the profits accruing from publication. They were disappointed, so goes the story, at not receiving coin of the realm for their collaboration,' and there has been talk of a lawsuit The two elder daughters of the high official went even further, and buying the passports of two French tourists they escaped to "Paris to interview Loti in person. Oritrin of Fourth Dn Henry Van who has «•**»«*\u25a0«•\u25a0 nrf \* tt? professorship at Princeton University to Wise Man Unknown devote himself entirely to literary work, is the author of "The Story of the Other Wise Man," which is probably the most -popular Christmas story, barring Clement Moore's "The Night Before! Christmas," that the world knows.' It appeared about twelve years ago and' has been translated into- every language, 'new editions being brought out; every year. Literary wiseacres have found innumerable imaginary original for it, but Van Dyke himself says that it has none that he knows of. "I do not. know where It came from," he told inquirers, "out of the, air perhaps. IJiad long studied and loved the tales of the Three Wise Men of the East as told in the Golden Legend of Jacobus de Voragin* and other medieval books, but of the Fourth Wise Man I had never heard until' that: night." .:. .'Princeton's Triangle Song" was a composition of Van Dylcs In hi» college'days; it goes to the tune of "Marching Through Georgia." He has written any number of quotable things, and The Footpath to Peace" is hung by^Stevenson's,' famous "Prayer" on many a woman's boudoir wall. This ta one of his sayings: "Time Is »>\. : - Too Slow for those who Wait, Too Short for 'those who Rejoice: Van Dyke "Queers" At a . di . nner , at the Pc rfodicai Publishers' Hi* Clam Stories Asso ? atloa &**..\u25a0 *.? Washington about two MS Liam Stories ycar3 >go Hamilton Wright Mabie intro duced Dr. Van Dyke as the man who puts fishing into good literature and literature into good fishing. The prof essor^told how he would write about the clam for different American magaiines: : An essay on the pronunciation of:the word clam for Harper's; an essay on the superiority of the cod to the dam for the Atlantic Monthly; the Clam Trust, for McClureV the clam in the tenement houses among .the /Italians, for the Century; and the clam in society, for the Smart Set. For the Outlook it would be A QUATRAIN TO A RECREANT CLAM: : Low dost thou lie amid the languid \u25a0 ooze. Because thy slothful 'spirit doth refuse . The bliss of battle and the strain of strife \u25a0 . Rise, craven clam, and lead the strenuous life. At that, time Brander Matthews was weighing Harper's down with essays on words, and the Century, was making a specialty of .the Riis articles on the tenement Italians, while, the "strenuous life" had been made a catch phrase by the President's .biographers in newspaperdom. Roosevelt, by the way, was present at the dinner and I have heard that he enjoyed the' grind so much that he could scarcely keep his seat from laughter. The toast master ventured the opinion that Dr. Van Dyke had' settled his own. fate, [ for non« of the magazines would ever again accept any of his articles. MARCH 12, 1907