The San Francisco call. [volume], February 28, 1909, Page 4, Image 4

About The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913

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A WOMAN HOMESTEADER A PERSONAL EXPERIENCE
IN THE ADAMLESS EDEN
Mary Margaret Shaw
ONE of the most tempting bar
gain counters ever offered to
tho American woman is that
controlled by the United States
government, aided and abetted by the
xnaln lines of railroad, and auctioned
off by the various land offices of the
west. This wonderfully fascinating
eale is on In great glory and it is
planned and manipulated in a manner
Just to catch the feminine fancy. The
first feature to command interest is
the fact that it Is a government propo
sition. This promises the protection
which it is In a woman's nature to ap
preciate. And this government prop
osition Is all methodically set forth In
official literature, which may be had by
writing: to any one of the government
land offices located within tho newly
opened territories. The literature is a
feast of promised good things with
which the average Sunday edition
ranks as a back number. Visions of
beautiful 6andy loam suited to grow-
Ing onions with a profit of marvelous
margin, rich chocolate soil adapted to
the cultivation of fruits of rare flavor,
or tight black lands unsurpassed In
growth of wheat and other grains, all
divided into quarter sections of 160
acres Just ready for the first bidder,
conjure up ideas of bargains which can
not be withstood. So while one Is
trying- to decide which kind she will
take, and what she will do with it
after the takes it, the old order of her
life is put behind and after a few hur
ried plans and a hasty goodby to
friendi the hies away to the west,
fearing: lest she get there too late for
the sale.
Arrived at some one of the small
towns of the New Mexico country, and
being: .established in the leading hotel.
ehe is gravely impressed that this is
a different kind of bargain from any
heretofore known. The advertisements
did not mention all the details she
meets in securing one of these - gifts
from the government. In fact she may
be made aware that there are no real
gifts left in that particular section
and the agents of the various real es
tate companies, with their impressive
automobiles.- Inform her that if she
wishes a really desirable claim, she
will likely have to pay a relinquish
xuent fee of some $200 or $300. This
will locate her on a railroad near a
postoffice, convenient to town or within
reach of some other advantage which
the hustling agent can muster up. Then
the fact that she must live on this land
for 14 consecutive months, put some
few hundred dollars' worth of improve
ments on it, cultivate a part of it and
do several other things, which arc
rather out of the ordinary for a woman
to do, causes the scales to fall from
HAVE WE ANY MANNERS?
liOOK. AT. OITR_ ANO&STORJ 1 AND TAKE CCWRAQ&/
Olive Percival
OUR ancestors do continually sur
prise us, but what can exceed
the amazement, perfectly justi
fiable, that comes with our first
glimpse at the approved etiquette books
of only a generation or a century or
two ago?
It is comforting to believe' that our
fires and their dames were the piifts of
courtesy and good breeding, irrespec
tive of their nationality or their station
In life. But -were tney? To the fair
minded who study the novels, the" jest
books and the courtesy books contem
porary with their lives — lives lived per
haps in the shadow of a palace— it is
not always evident.
And, except to the very young, who
can not see beneath the glittering sur
face, the exaggerated bows, the over
polished compliments, the kissing of
perfumed hands and the spreading of
velvet . cloaks over muddy crossings
teem theatrical and decidedly tiresome
in an age that believes in such things
as democracy, international conciliation,
coeducation, pragmatism!
. Today one .of the most popular and
amusing fallacies among the nations is
that we Americans have no. manners
"whatever; that all our women are sel
flsh, stridenfvoSced, overdressed Daisy
JtlillerF; that all our men chew tobacco,
lilde behind newspapers at breakfast
rtuid <Jlne in their shirt sleeves. And
yet many old cosmopolitans and travel
er*, who claim to be. discriminating in
.the matter of good manners, solemnly
declare that we can well afford to be
Criticised by both Paris and Berlin.
We are a ridiculously new, composite
race, but are we not an intelligent one—
Indisputably benign, introspective, emu
lative, sympathetic and fond of laugh
ter?
To us a perusal of the etiquette books
that only a century or two ago went
through innumerable editions in all the
great cities of Europe reveals this im
portant, this unpleasant fact: that the
Immediate descendants of all the picture
gallery folk, so picturesque in powdered
"wigs, swords, brocades and lace frills
were in danger of inheriting the man
ner* of snobs, boors and pigs only.
While their background and courtly
manners were, extremelj- decorative, we
must not regret that they have passed
away forever. Society has outgrown
the romantic drama period. It is learn
ing 1 to think.
' Good breeding Is founded only upon
the Gibraltar «>f simple human kind-
nesp; but society has not always been
kind and considerate and manners have
ever fluctuated with the. tides of fash-
Jon. Tho following dicta from a famous
court rpy .book were penned by a cer
tain man' of affairs \u25a0 for real people,
who considered themselves the perfect
flower of enlightenment. The glamor
«f this gentleman's century has faded
anfl. in the cars of an educated democ
racy, Ms paragraphs read like direc
tions for a puppet show only:
"If in company with an Inferior it
ii well worth your attention not to let
him feel his inferiority.- •/ • * It
you take pains to mortify him it is an
Insult not readily forgot.
"At table there can not be a greater
insult than to help an inferior to a
part he dislikes and take the best
yoursel t. \u25a0 jMRHBEbB
"Walking * fast in tlte streets Is a
mark of vulgarity. It may appear well
In a mechanic or tradesman, but suits
ill. with tlio character of a gentleman
or a man of fashion.
"Eating Quick or slow at meals is
her eyes and she realizes It is no bar
gain sale she has come to attend.
By this time she has become ac
quainted with a number of the other
women who have undertaken the propo
sition and as she learns the custom of
the country and watches the splendid
heroism of these truly earnest home
seekers, the eternally feminine awakens
within her and she resolves herself into
a ways and means committee to pos
sess the desired quarter section, not
as a land bar^aln^but as a homestead
characteristic of the vulgar. It has'the
appearance of being used to hard work.
"Smelling the meat while on your
fork being put" to your mouth is vulgar.
"Spitting on the carpet is a nasty
practice. It. will lead your" acquaint
ances to bellev«7 that '.youiarc not used
to genteel furniture.
; "Wit is the- most. 'dangerous talent
lhe female can possess. It must •be
guarded with discrPt'on."
In a rjirc item -of Anier:i-ana, printed
in X<»w'"York and in "a" year so recent
as 1849. one reads with little gravity
that v.-hlcli was 'written for the socially
tfmbitfou-* of that period by a.proper
\y serious social leader, long dead and
alas' forgotten. Thc's-Uthor deems; lils
advice an absolute, necessity In that
sadly mercantile period" of the fifties,
with "people continually -rising Jin the
world and with, their new wealth ac
quiring a taste for.' the
superfluities of life with .the ' use of
which they , are only imperfectly ac
quainted!" . . .
This little book, "The- American
Manual of Elegance and -Fashion." is
divided Into 18 chapters. Curiously
enough, three of; them Vare 1 --entitled
"Tattling," " "Smoking" and ''Advice •\u25a0 to
Tradespeople." V Any one" -but- a *\u25a0 New
Yorker-smiles the^smile of-the" uncon
vinced- as he reads: "In fall cases the
obEervences of ' the ' metropolis •< the : seat
Of -refinement) -should" be received ;as !
the.; standard; of good breeding." .Here
follow some.. of > the '-'improvlnsA rules'
that appeared*for/ the guidance of "the
"Durward j Belmonts," tho "St.' Elmos".
of her very own, where she can have
about her the chickens which lay fresh
eggs, the vegetables with home made
flavor, her books, cats, canary birds,
doge^— everything which goes to make
a home, except: an objectionable man.
He can be hired at very reasonable
rates for necessary farm work and be
dispensed with \u25a0at pleasure.
\u25a0 While hesitating over her choice of
location she accepts, the hospitality of
some of the established homesteaders
and going out some four miles from
and the dames and belles of only 60.
years ago.
"It is considered vulgar to take soup
or fish twice. i
"Hot soup at table is very vulgar.
It should be brought to table only.mod
ern tel y warm.
"Do not pick your teeth much at
table. . /
"Asking ladies to take wine is now
quite exploded. • j
"At very respectable tables. you will
find, silver forks. Sle«-1 forks are now .
never placed on the table.
"There is nothing more plebeian than
thin bread at, dinner. It should never
be loss than an inch and-a half thick./:
"Never use a knife to convey food to
your mouth. It is glaringly vulgar./
This is a besetting sin of Americans of -
all ranks. . \u25a0 \u25a0\u25a0:-'.,
''Pie and pudding are to be eaten with
a spoon.
"It is not elegant to gnaw Indian
corn.
"Ladies should never dine with'thcir
gloves on unless their hands are not .
fit to be seen. • >' \u25a0 r^\ J S -
"Do not gargle your mouth at table,
albeit the usage prevails among a
few who think-b'ecause it-is a- foreign
habit it can not be" disgusting.
"The. custom of firinking toasts until
drunkenness results Is .jquite -'banished 2
from a gentleman's table to its- proper;
place— tlie tavern.
"Nevor introduee.'pooplt! (o each otlier
without a previous, understanding th.-U
it wilt be agreeable' to both. .Should
you. wliile walking with; a friomlMneet
an acquaintance,', never : introduce": them.
\u25a0 '"Never make ncquaintanci-s in coffee
house or ' otlicr \u25a0 puhlic -'places. "^ It .; a'
man is " worth knowing \u25a0 he is surely
worth the trouble to. approacli prop
erly. It will likewise relievejybu from
the awkwardness? of ' being acquainted'
witli people of whom you might be
ashamedor obliged^to\cut.
"It is understood 'that a person -who
has been : properly introduced to*, you
has some claim; on your.; good -offices :in
future. You can: not slight himWith--'
out .the chance of ' being, called' to ac
count for.it. \u25a0;\u25a0 '\u0084-*.. \u25a0'.-'\u25a0' •, '\u25a0..".-- ':"\u25a0\u25a0)\u25a0:
,"A. letter should never remain" un- ; ;
answered a moment longer than is ab
solutely necessary. "'"•;
'"When a' -.man ; marries it is under- .
stood that; all former acquaintanceship
ends, unless '.lib -intimates a .desire ;to
renew it by sending you ;hls ~ own \ and
his ; wife's _ cards,', .which* are 'united; by i
a silken or'.sllver oord. Jf this, be
neglected, be r sure -no/ further inter
course is .'.."desired..." ."".'. ,l = : •"-;',,"
"The gentlemnn "of the- hichest dis
tinction is placed by the ': hostess -; : af/
dinner, who will assist her to ; carve..
" "It Is a matter of 'rpgrot that; table ."
napkins are not; considered indispens
able.: even •in England.' Uut;th«y are \u25a0
far from' general. If there be no; nap-.
kins a*, man has no ; alternative but ItoV
use~»the tablo "t-lbth vunless \u25a0[ lie prefer,
(an many 'do) his /pocket handkerchief,
-—a : usage sufflclently.: disagreeable.,
"Do not. suppose ithat it will " exalt;;
you in the 1 eyes", of 'others to speak
harshly.and imperatively to a- servant ;
or; add to";' your.; consequence". '•
"If you shbuld/beisb /unfortunate i as
to, have contracted .the low ". habit V of f
smoking bef careful ; to practice' it' un
;der. certain "restrictions, so '.long; as 'you
'are 'desirous 'of,;being. considered fit for ;
civilized f society.'., '.\u25a0'-.V: /"'-"<-' :;': ;'. ','/'\u25a0' ''
" "After sn-iokliig wash your ; mouth and
\u25a0 b^rush :yqurJ;teeth..^"\yhat^man ;of -deli-^
cacy. : would -presume', to' address ' a" ladyl
with his ; breath -snieillng ,• of onions? \u25a0
Tobacco" is~j; equally , odious. The to
bacco '\u25a0' smoker in" " public .'is :'the mos t •
) the little town, she finds, snugly housed
in a well built cottage of one ; room,
14x16, a' little : Dutch stenographer,
formerly, employed' ln one of the .'lead
ing Texas cities ;by lawyers and bank-,
ers -who paid round sums for her
services.; ._ Having.; tired of the monot
ony, of ..the grind, shehas, brought her.
earnings s : to one: of these government,
claims/and ;is v making an experiment
worthy '< of ;i commendation from 1 the de
partment at '.Washington. \
Of the j 160 acres she "has put 20
• under . fence. In the center of this ,20
acre'inclosure, ledv.upto by an avenue"
- of ' flpurishin g poplars,* recently ordered
from alNebraska nursery, stands -the
bird nest cottage. V And j it , holds ,treas- 1
ures which you; might t hot expecK,j,to
see housed on a western "• claim. , If
-the vvlsltor- doubts the little hostess
having^ an: interesting history, she will
be convinced, of her error while tak-
Ing:in the contents of this 14x16 room.
The west efid is vgiven over to culinary
arrangements, and she -is pleased with
the picture after her; brisk .drive out'
'in the New ~"Mexico. atmosphere. -She
likes; the ' appearance, of -the: bright,
substantial cooking stove, with its set
ting ofr tea kettle, stew pans and
double f boiler;' while corner,, op-:
posite \ this s .with its shelves of dishes
and 2x4 dining table is 'quite -to her
notion./' Still she does not -find In it
anything, unusual until her; tea is :
servedrln a cup the like .of which 'she
never 'saw before, and 'the pattern; of ,
the silver invoking her admiration, she
is'^lnformed that it .was brought by
the* hostess' Smother from the father
land and; is kept by her as a link with
the past. \u25a0;. ..-.,
Supper over, .attention is turned to
1h& other features of the room. In
the -/east, corner nearest the .door, fthe
toilets arrangement : of dressing " table
nnd /washstand makes .a. pleasant: im
pression, and this^ is heightened when
the plan. of,the -> opposite -corner, with
its -book, table, reading lamp and
shelves holding treasures of the .world's .\u25a0. \u25a0
best efforts ; in- literature and music, is
observed. 'Everything from, the; Luth-
e ran hymn book . and Shakespeare, Sto |
current, "-pamphlets ;-on forestry,. dry :
farming -and', poultry.: raising, 'is found
on the shelves, and as the music claims
attention, .-masterpieces: .from Bee
thoven," .Wagner and. Mendelssohn pro
claim the German appreciation of the
best in this- art,- and •, the -guest is not
surprised to learn" that' the hostess is
descended ' from "one ,: of : .the court
musicians..;' \/ - ;
The grounds about this more than
curiosity shop bespeak taste and a
love for both the beautiful .and the
good in^nature. In front of , the- door
about one-fourth of an acre has been
reserved for a lawn, and this quarter
acre has been bordered -,with,*a: setting
of Austrian plnesl To the sides and
in the rear are walnut, hazlenut^pecan,
selfish, animal^imaginable. ilo perse"-"
vercs .in 'contaminating • the pure;;; and
fragrant air,-- earelp"- <>f.;\vli"om ho -an
noys.*;.' Ho "is but thY; fit' inmate of \u25a0l.'sV"
tavern: :- .', ; : \u25a0-.*
.'\u25a0 ._"Sni6kinp:.in v the 'streets is only prac
.tleed l»y- fj'iop boys and pceudo -fash"-,
lonablep.- ; .', ;.- _".'',-;" ['• I' '
."\u25a0j-v "All'; songs you pee^ written in praise .
of smoking .. or. hear . sung upon J t he '
. stage", are -puffs "paid -for. by. the. pro
prietors-of the- tobacco divnns-and to
bacco* shops- to "make; their/- trade popu
lar. ' ; Therefore^ never ;| be 'deluded-: by
them.^V; ~/i'.p :'.'.\u25a0' :.V\.
"The-spittingiconsequent-upcn chew- ,
\u25a0ing. tobacco ; lias .been _niade a .matter of
r grave comment Tor *bf [well, founded ridi- •
: culejby/all^who 'have- visited ". the -^United. \u25a0
States.- 1 : It ";is f indeed - at .' variance with'
all ;the, decencies 4 of; life..-'. C
' .'.'Never;. be 'seen ;iu , cigar divans, or
billiard 'rooms.. They ; are frequented
byJarTi equivocal ?-set.'" .'\u25a0
is 7a 'very, serious evil
in the^yqung.- men -."of '\u25a0•America;'
usual ly,-; look 7 as ;if they had conio' but
of a bandbox.. ; \u25a0-\u25a0
"Never ' affect .the. V ruffianly* - stylo!-of
dress 'unless '\u25a0 as some "excuse : you r hold
gooseberry, German prune, cherry,
peach and all the good trees you
might mention. Some 50 yards east
of the house lies the garden, newly
made and promising: returns In po
tatoes, cabbages,- cantaloupes and
onions. .Aside from this a miniature
forest'of six or "eight hundred black
locu3t; trees .lias -.been put out, while
scattered here and there are found
dogwood and German linden trees.
.The sole occupants of this estate
are the little -woman" and her bonny
black" horse, which is comfortably
stabled within the -20 acre .inclosure.
In the morning < before preparing her
.•l'ljx'illiant position _ in society.
\u25a0 •'Ijadics of good taate seldom wear
•jewels in the -morning. -
\u25a0.; ''If; a lady.waltzwith* you beware. not '
to' press her waist; you must only ltouch".
lightly ;.with"the pnlm of your hand."
lest you leave a disagreeable, impression
not only'on.a .white satin gown but on
? 1 1 p r ,< Yn l ln d .* ; V-^fV; J~ -.v;^is§§§i
.-';£ "Above" rill.' do not, quarrel"; In-, a; ball
room.' It" disturbs the harmony of the
company and should be avoided Jf pos
sible. \u25a0;-.-. '• ... .:| /. .' ;: ;,; .' \u25a0 .
, "There -is^a. slightly subdued patri
cian tone of ..voice "which we fjsr 'can
be 'acquired in good society.'. ' •
: '\u25a0(- "Saver ss t in til c theater with - your
hat ~6n.' It is an insult'.to'ithe-ladies.
, "Never .'- nod .to \ ajady- in ' the - street
norT be "satisfied with touching your
hat.. Tdke.it off. ".. ;
;^t','ln: giving: dinners endeavor^tb en
gage -persons' only * whoVarc'^ known' to
each' other. '" :%. -,*' :'•-"
/•Mothers; should, be" careful not tdife
peat.-rr'urnery. anecdotes. :-hs : however in- .
le resting: j.'in^thoai'sa 1 vc.s. '4 they are "Sel-'
tlom so r to others." ';;.; v- v .
:\u25a0' TJk>. so-called'; polite society oE : any
country,' ariycity,. any village is rarely?
own breakfast she deals out to him
his forage, and while he is munching
this repast she scrambles her eggs,
browns her toast, ; makes coffee, and
after a solitary breakfast she hooks in
the horse and: is off to her town office
before her neighbors are yet afield.
With the salary earned here she sup
plies her living and puts in Improve
ments from time to time, and 'thus
she is making her career luminant
with hope and work.
Going back to her hotel room the
newcomer again finds herself In the
ebb and flow of the home seeker's .cur
rent, and she meets at breakfast 'next
the : politest. ; Among/ the edicts issued
by an; empress not so' very, very long
ago were'; these:
"Indies will refrain from wiping
: their,;, mouths, on the, .table cloths.
Noblemen are -forbidden { o strike- their
wives In company. cJentlemen must
not get drunk before the {east: is
ended."
Ultra fashionable society overac
reri'iuates; externals. Its. estimate of all
outside .Us circle, being disproportion
ately low,' it directly results in acheap
eried, .egoUstical standard of manners
and' ethics. The, manners of American
gentlewomen are not to', be judged by
,t he; attitude' of. a few toward the wage
earnins" woman ; (from house maids :to
school teachers) , nor /by their thought
less demeanor. In public places. Amer
ican-; gentlemen : stilly have ' streetcar
manners - and .-automobile' manners, »al
: tnough ;\u25a0 doubted "\u25a0.-\u25a0 by. many. Our defi
ciencies; are" glaring; and; they are use^
fui, ; but only as themes' 1 for.. our car
toonists -and our foreign - critics. We
I know : them to >be - sporadic. . fleeting
to pa" 3s away .'with a 'generation- or^twoi
of • Americanization.
Abraham: Lincoln was one of the
The San Francisco Sunday Call
vnorning a charming young woman who
tells her much of western history, and
she- looks forward with pleasure to
talking with her again, but Is later
disappointed to learn that the western
historian left jtf or Kansas on the morn
ing train.'
At noon her interest Is attracted by
the appearance of an arrival laden with
. a supply of • fresh strawberries ana a
mass of carnations, which she has been
nursingiall the way'from Oklahoma in
order to get them in good shape to her
sister who Is holding down a claim
some ten miles from, the little town.
A few, minutes with this frank open
eyed stranger gains her a share of the
berries, an exchange of cards and an
invitation to visit her and the sister
on the newly established claim.
" At supper a third acquaintance o?
the day is made. This time a woman
of .mature years xvich the bearing an.!
dignity which a life well spent always
lends. Supper finished, they renew tho
acquaintance In tho parlor and It i^
learned that this lady some thn><
years previously lost her husband ami.
being broken in health, was advisM
by, her physician to make a change of
location. Knowing of the altitude of
New Mexico. Its crystal sunshine and
•atmosphere, she came out for these
benefits. The throb oT new life about
her added its Interest to her cure and
the spell of -the west ensnared her for
•all time. Eager to become a part of this
new order of things, she returned to *
her Illinois home, disposed other lands
-there at $73 an aero, closed up other
business and with her youngest child.
a boy of 10, returned and filed on land
3S miles from a railroad or post office.
Here she had her teams, household
goods and other necessities conveyed,
and in a new environment took up the
broken plan of life and began all
over again. Soon other settlers came
about her and a land company chose
her neighborhood as n desirable loca
tion'for an Inland town. The town was
laid off. a sale of tots advertised, a
hack line run out, a telephone put in. •
a post office secured with this Illinois
lady as postmistress, and today she
finds herself the center of a community,
building schools, churches, and de
veloping lands heretofore traversed by
the native red man, and still marked
by altars -to his gods and filled with
game which gave him food.
The business woman is not alone in
the establishment of homes upon these
lands. The teacher is here, the nurse,
the poultry raiser, the chamber maid,
the cook and even the woman with a
mission, and all find a way to work out
the plan of securing title to these
homes. A crude but earnest effort is
made by them to cultivate the soil.
for this is one of the requirements of
the government, and Darwin*3 famous
study on "Worms as Farmers'* com
pares but poorly in vital Interest with
the "women as farmers" of these vast
plains and high brown table land?.
It is a mistake of the head and not of
the heart if one gets cantaloupe seed •
in $20 amounts, puts out potato Blips
when ehe should be digging the crop,
plants cabbages in hills, and cucum
bers in .rows. She brings the seed Into
the country and perhaps the birds may
distribute them wisely. Sh.9 is doing
hef best- to create an Adartfiesa Eden,
with the hope that by and by the Eden
may be her own. and with the ma
jority the survival of the fittest will
hold true. , ft
world's great gentlemen, although ho
lacked the perfect polish of Douglas
and his other distinguished associates.
His. honesty and kindness were super
lative and kept him from petty pre
tences. ll« was a peer., the man to
master any situation- which confronted
him; not even » hrad waiter could dis
concert him. At the first state dinner
given by him a« president of the Unlte.l
Ktates.his butler asked which wine h»
would take — white- or red. His reply
was characteristic: "1 don't know;
which .would you-?"
Another really great gentleman, an
American said: "I wish cities could
teach the best lesson — quiet manners.
It is .the foible d American youth —
pretension. The mark of the man of
the world (the- gentlemen) Is absenca
•of pretension."
" "Emerson is temporarily pushed asid»
•for the "six best sellers of the month.
But when" rJI Americans read fre
quently h!s : rtjsays on . "Behavior" and .
"Cultyre." there .will be little nesd oCk
the."Hiats« on etiquette" columns with.B
which- our monthly periodicals dt> afiiictv™
v«. And perhaps the twenty-nrat
century will not laugh at usl