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Freddy Film sdf dg ag asd fas And He Gets a Hit Tomorrow: "Safe! Safe!" The wife of a New Seaham miner won $10,000 in a Geneva sweepstake on the St. Deger. She received the news aimultaneously with a message the death of her mother. Cyeltsts in Denmark are forbidden by law to ride faster than the or dinary speed of a cab through any town. ... —w,-— . The Dingbat Family Polly and Her Pals Us Boys A Delicate Commission //qpHE way of the transgressor is i I hard." So ls the way of the unwary youth who allows him self to be inveigled into doing a lady's shopping. I made the discovery one afternoon when Dolly begged me to do a trifling commission for her. She had been shopping all the morning, and, of course, had forgotten some thing. Dolly usually does forget. She rather prides herself on her ex cellent memory, scorns to make a list of her requirements, and inevitably omits a most important item. Dolly, by the way, is my sister. She is several years older than I, and, though it is some time since I left college, she i B still inclined to treat me like an Infant. Moreover, she gives me credit for about as much in tellect as is possessed by a child of 3. We had Just finished luncheon when "Jackie, darling," she began in a most ingratiating tone. When she calls me "Jackie" I know she is going to ask me to do some thing disagreeable. I pretended not to hear. "Jackie, darling," Bhe repeated, exchanging her seat to the arm of my chair. "I want you to do me a favor." "W r ell, what is it?" I asked abruptly, not looking up from the paper in which I was absorbad. A FAVOR "1 forgot something most important this morning," she said, "and I want you to get It for me." THE SAN' FRANCISCO CALL, MONDAY, OCTOBER 20, 1913. I had guessed aa much. Therefore I settled myself mora comfortably In my chair. '1 did not intend to go out thla afternoon," I informed her. "It's too beastly hot. "Why can't you go?" "People coming to tea, and I've a heap of odds and ends to do before then. Really I haven't the time. I might manage it, but it would be an awful rush. Jackie, you might go," she added beseechingly. I remained silent. "Look here," she bribed, "I'll tell you what I'll do for you if you'll do this for me. I'll phone the Weather by girls that we'll drive round and pick them up on our way to the dance. Then you can be introduced to Nina beforehand." I was very keen to meet Nina. I had hitherto adored her from afar. She was remarkably pretty, to say the least of It—very vivacious and, according to fellows who knew her, a Jolly good sport. Vainly had I sought an introduction for some time past, and now that Dolly was going to make the possibility of having one, perhaps several dances with her a certainty, I felt willing to do almost anything. As the door closed upon me I heard her repeating, "One pair, open pat tern, ladles' embroidered —" I waited for no more. I had already been told what to get at least three time*. It ia rather a habit of Doliya to instruct you what you are to vet and impress upon your mind what you are not to get, several tiroes over. Consequently. It la possible to become so muddled that you end bg purchas ing- the wrong article after all I believe she sometimaa even bewilders herself. IN THE SHOP I sat beside a long counter, whereon all sorts of "dainty lingerie"—l be lieve they call It—was seductively displayed. Garments of a most elu sive kind—a bit of gossamer, a little lace, a bow of ribbon—scarcely more. The pretty young saleswoman be gan to fold and replace the various articles she had taken out for her last customer's selection, glancing every now and then in my direction. At length, coming forward, she said with a bewitching smile: "Anything I can do for you, sir?" "Yes," I began. "I want a pair of open pattern lady's embroidered —" I said no more. To talk to one's self I've been told is supposed to b« a sign of lunacy. A regular conclave of > assistants seemed to be taking place at the far end of the counter. Stray phrases'— "No, did he, really?" "He never?" and such like floated across to me. They conveyed no particular mean ing, nor was I in any way interested. After some minutes another young Isdy approached me "Are you being attended to?" she asked sweetly. "I thought I was," I repliad. - "Evi dently, I am not. What I want is a Advance, Lady Thursday (Copyright. IMS. International New* ferric*) Never Make It Official Copyright, 1013, International Neva latilaa pair of open pattern lady's embroid ered—" To my astonishment she. too. was gone, her face and neck dyed with a blush that would have shamed a peony. There now seemed to be cause for considerable indignation among ths girls aa they gathered round tbe last comer. "Is it a fact?" I heard them say. "What cheek!" "Did you ever?" while curious glances were markedly thrown in my direction. They cer tainly seemed to bo talking about me, and I began to feel embarrassed and most miserably self-conscious. What could possibly be wrong? I deter mined to find out. There was a look ing glass behind me, and I felt I muat see myself at any price. VERY PUZZLED Naturally, before all those staring girls I did not wish to do so too ob viously. I dropped my stick as an excuse, and, after picking it up, seated myself upon the chair op posite. I surveyed my reflection at length. My hair was smooth; my tie was of place. As far as I could see, I straight; nothing was undone or out was quite O. K. Then why this ap parent Interest? I again turned my attention to ths girls, to whom I still seemed to be a center of attraction. They kept Sin gling and nudging each other, say ing: "You go." "No, you go." "I couldn't," "I haven't the face," and a lot of silly rubbish of the same sort. After some delay, one emerged from The Great Lineup (Registered United States Patent Office) the group aad advanced toward me. She wac a very superior young per son, and inquired with a certain hauteur: "What may I do for you, sir?" I commenced to repeat my request. Before I had the time to finish she seized a box of goods that was lying on the counter, slammed it noisily into place on the shelf behind her and departed with more haste than dignity. This was absurd. By this time I was positively furious. I determined to report the assistants and then leave the premises, when a floor walker strolled into sight. I there upon stalked up to him and angrily demanded the meaning of such ex traordinary conduct. I had, I ex plained, been waiting for a good quarter of an hour without yet being served. "No less than three young ladles," I proceeded," have asked what I wanted and hurriedly left before I had time to complete my order." He smiled apologetically. "I'm sorry, sir," he said. "But may I ask what you require?" "I want," I replied, "a pair of ladies' open pattern embroidered stockings." "I fear." he ventured, "there's been a slight misunderstanding—wrong department. Hosiery," he said tersely. "First on the right." Never again, I vow, will I be forced, duped or cajoled into doing any inti. mate shopping for a lady! Telephone operators in Egypt are required to speak English, French, Italian, Greek and Arabic Do You Know That— A French company has applied to the Russian ministry ot ways and communications for permission to give cinematograph entertainments on the trans-Siberian trains and on other Russian trains covering Jour. neys occupying more than 24 hours. It is proposed that special carriages with adequate accommodation for such performances shall be attached to each train. The price of admis sion for the entertainments is fixed at a quarter. Mr. H. G. Davis of Hoo, near Roches ter, is not only master of the local workhouse, but is relieving officer, vaccination officer, deputy registrar of births and deaths, building surveyor, sanitary inspector, treasurer of the Hoo institute and licensed reader at the parish church. The most common letter is E. In 1,000 letters E occurs 137 times in English, 184 times in French, 145 in Spanish and ITB in German. The world's kissing records were broken recently at Salem, 0., by six girls, who collected $10,000 by sell ing kisses at $1 each in aid of the endowment fund of the Salem hos pital. The "kissing bee" lasted two hours. There wag a half mile line of men, aged IS to 80, waiting their turn. Some men took their kiss and went back along the line several times until seised by the ears and marched home by their indignant wives. Lack of desire to eat after the death of a near relative led Mr. W. Beidlc man of Harrisburg, Pa.; to abstain from all food for 50 days. Although he is 95 years old, he apparently suf fered no ill effects from the fast. Makes Unsightly Hairs Quickly Disappear (Beauty Culture) A smooth, hairless skin is possible for every woman if she uses a dela tone paste to remove the ugly hairs. This simple treatment quickly ban ishes all hair or fuzz and leaves the skin firm and spotless. The paste, made by mixing water with pow .dered delaton'e, is applied to the skin for 2 or 3 minutes, then rubbed off and the skin washed. Xo harm results from this treatment, but care should be used to see that you get delatone in an original package.