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TIMELY TOPICS. Experiments in London prove that dry heat, when it can be applied, is prob ably the most efficient of all disinfect ants, and that the old plan of stopping up crevices and fumigating with sulphur and charcoil is more efficacious than any other proceeding with more modern dis infectants. It really seems as if Ireland's day had begun to dawn at last, and that, too, when other countries are in throes. An Irish landlord, writing in Frazier's Mag' azine, nays that " There never was a time in the memory of any one living when Irii-h tenants were making so much money, or rents were so well paid." Potato bugs, few or many, are to be f und crawling about every ship along the piers. Americans probably would be glad if every bug should emigrate ; but forwign port wardens might feci jus tified in placing ships thus infested in quarantine. Such pests as the Norway rat, the house mouse, the garden snail, and a large number of destructive insects have been spread abroad by being car ried in c.irgoes from their native coasts .V. 1'. TrU,uiv. Dur.ixo the closing hours of the ses-i-i m the disorder became so great that lie sergcant-at-arms took down hissilver mace and walked around though the dis affected provinces. What he would have done with it had any irate member " swatted him across the smeller," noth ing but divine wisdom can say. A more useless piece of stage business can hardly lw conceived than a sergeant at-arms with a silver axe and bundle of rods, bonanza Iictor, loafing around the tempe tuous legislature like the tambour major of a colored band, lie didn't hit anylxwly, however. If, he had, the lic- tor wouiu nave got licked. The leading dry-good houses of Chi capo have lor several years been buying in burope instead of New York. A. T. Stewart fc Co., are to open next month a buge dry goods house in Chicago and to make a straight bid for the country trade. Their agent, Sabin K. Smith, told a reporter of the Post that they " would take a stand from the start as though they had been eaablished for ten years in Chicago : there would bo no question alxmt time, style, credit, orany Jiing but they would continue their trade as they had been doing in New York, saying tJ their 'customers on their way cast, stop right here and et your g'ods, and save the jourrey." A frontiersman suggests the follow ing benevolent plan for clearing out the "Injuns." He says: "If I wuz the gover'ment I'd buy lots of barrels of whisky and lots 'o big knives, and I'd put 'em somewhar in the west, an' invite every redskin in the hull land to what they call a conference. After they'd got thar I'd knock in the heads 'o the barrels and scatter the knives all 'round loose so they'd le handy. Then I'd go away and leave the Injuns to themselves. Of course, they'd take the whisky and the knives, and before sundown thar wouldn't be more than one redskin left, and then I'd go and knock his brains out afore he could do any more damage. That sir, 's the only reel way to settle the Injun question. I've been among 'em, 'an I know. I'lenty of whisky an' long knives '11 fix 'em out, an' nothing else will. The Scientific American suggests as" a s.-arecrow, fitted to intimidate the bold est bird, tw small looking-glasses fast ined back to back, and hung by one cor ner to an clastic pole. The bra vent crow will depart if one of the lightning flashes from the sun's reflected rays fall on him. Another terror involves an artificial hawk made from a big potato and long g;se and turkey feathers. It is aston ishins what a ferocious-looking bird of prey can Ikj constructed from the above simple materials. It only remains to hang the object from a tall lent pole, and the wind will do the rest. The bird makes swoops ami dashes in the most h'-adlon ' and threatening manner. Even the most inquisitive of venerable hens has lccii known to hurry rapidly from its dangerous vicinity, while to small birds it carries unmixed dismay. Wi: see it slated that the recent report of Mr. A Vat son to the British govern ment upon the state of Florida has at tracted the attention of all Europe in that direction, and it is Itclieved that the state will largely profit during the coming year lrom the emigration rapidly tending toward it. In this connection it is interesting to note that a great deal of attention is leing given in Europe to ngineering projects in this country more particularly with regard to the ship canal from the gulf of Mexico to the Pacific, and that across the peninsula of Florida. There is little doubt that the latter canal, which can easily be built, will Ikj constructed within the next few years, the basis being too good to le neglected in times like-thesc, when there are millions of money seeking for investment. The Paris correspondent of the New York Times says, in his last letter to that journal, that the money an readily he found in Europe, and that IVIxvsseps, who built the Suez canal, is Wginniug to turn his attention to the Florida canal, not only as an en gineering scheme, but as one of the rur-e.-t sources of immediate profit that, to it -e his own phrase, "could be picked out from thousands which have been brought under his notice since the com pletion of the Suez canal." In the com mercial part of this work he sees the tvrtainty of large and speedy returns, and ays that, so far as he can judge from the maps and rejorts; the engineer ing work would offer no difficulties, and ould le done at a figure even below the si imates. Pittsburg Commercial. Parallel ok the Sexes. There is at admirable partition of the qualities between the sexes, which the Author of our being has distributed to each with a wi-'dom that challenges our unfunded admiration : Man is strong woman is beautiful. Man is daring and confident woman is diffident aud unassuming. Man is great in action woman in suf fer ng. Man shines abroad woman at home. Man t ilks to convince woman to per suade and please. Man has a rugged heart woman a soft o:i. Man prevents misery woman relieves it Man has science woman has taste. Man has judgment woman has seusi bility. Man is a being of justice woman an angel of mercy. THE man, who, weary of his wife's ab senceon a visit to her mother, had a photo graph of his house taken with himself and bis neighbor's wifestandingon the porch, which he senttohisbetter-half.hasarival in the one who simply s iw that bis letter contained, as if by accident, a red hair alsiut three feet long. His wife wouldn't have waited for the next train to get borne, could she Lave sent herself by telegraphy. r By HORSLEY & HEMPHILL. LATEST JSTEWS. MO ITT II AFfO HfEJI. California m-ancer estimate the sur- plus wheat this season at six hundred tons. The rice hands of Beaufort, S. wnave struck for higher wages. The east branch penitentiary is to be built at RuskTexas. W. II. Hunt has been appointed attor ncy-eeueral of Louisiana, vice iielus, ofr ceased. ' Two companies of United States troops from Mcrherjon Barracks, Atlanta, have been ordered to rendezvous at Edgefield courthouse. The new rice crop is beginning to ar rive at Charleston. S. C. John Iteardon, or Redding, one of the Dallas, Texas, bank robbers, has been cap tured. The first bale of cotton from North Carolina wa sold at the New York cotton exchange for 12 M cents per pound. Fifty-one workmen from Paris, Bor deanx, JTavre, Marseilles, Lyons and other cities in France, sent by the trench govern meut to visit the exhibition at Philadelphia and study the improvements which are mat in; iu the different trades they represent, have arrived. It is now reported that the prospect for an abundant cranberry crop in the St. Croix Valley, Miss., was never more prom ising. It is stated that the crop this year will pay lor all the improvements made on improved marshes. The berry crop this year, so far, has been good. The cut-off in the Mississippi river at Yicksburg, Miss., does not as yet leave that citv "high and dry." The Vicksbnrg Her ald says: "Just its we predicted before it occurred, the cut-off has been a benefit to the citv instead of an injury. It has relieved the suspense in regard to the matter, with out inflicting, as yet, the least damage, and with nothing worse to fear in the future than possibly a small outlay to keep the harbor clear." A general Drder from the war depart ment directs Col. Ituger, on assuming com maud of the department of the south, on or about September 1, to transfer the headquar ters of the department to Atlanta, Oa. The companies of the second infantry, now in the department of the gulf, ill be lr.uir.ferred to the department of the south and head quarters, and the companies of the sixteenth infantry, now in that department, will be transferred to the department of the gulf. The Turkish minister at Washington, Aristarchi Bey, has received an official declar ation by the Turkish government, dated the l!tth, giving the history of the beginning of the hostilities with Servia and Montenegro, representing that the Porte was compelled to repel aggression by force, and that the Porte had religiously adhered to the treaty of Paris, and that the onus of having broken their treaty stipulations rests on the princes of Servia and Montenegro. Strenuous efforts of the English and German iron firms, says the Springfield Re publican, to supply the rolling stock of Bra zilian railways have failed to set the trade away from American- manufacturers. The American good are preferred for tiieirquil Uy, after a trial pi the European, and the exportation TTTbaflocomotives and cirs has revived, one brig carrying out pins of twelve common-gauge and two narrow gauge loco motives and a half-dozen cirs, the other day, to be assembled on arrival. A dispatch from the Yellowstone ex pedition, from the steamer Josaphine, near the mouth of the Yellowstone, August 20lh, by way of Bismarck, August 25lh, says, that since the junction of Crook and Terry, it is hoped to overtake and force a fight with the Sioux. The command moved west to liie Horn mountains, where, on the fourteenth, a trail five or six days old and two miles wide, being the heaviest ever seen on the prairies, was discovered. This trail finally separated, and the Indians were found to he in lull retreat, one nanu neaciing lor me north, toward the Brilish possessions, with a probable intention of crossing the line; the other going south, along the Little Missouri, for the purpo.-e of crossing tiie Missouri river above fort BerthoM. There is every indica tion that the hordes have been heavily rein forced by the agency Indians. They have their families, and evidently intend remaining noith this winter. The army has a difficult programme, and it will be almost miraculous if thev overtake the savages, who are well mounted, and when the supplies are ex hausted the soldiers will have to return to the supply camp. A later dispatch, 'latei'lAu gust 2"d, by way of Bismarck, says : " Crook and Terry, after following the trail discov ered on the twelfth, moved thirty-six miles dow n the Rosebud. The northern trail was abandoned on the fourteenth, and the com mand pursued the southern trail, crossed Tongue river to Goose Creek, thence re turned to Powder river, followed it to its mouth, which they reached on the eight eenth, where they went int.i camp, and will remain until the twenty-fourth. The wagon train and all supplies at the mouth of the Tongues are being shipped to the mouth of Powder river, and it is expected that the wagon train will reach there to-morrow morning. The Indian trail diverged from the east bank of Powder river, about twenty miles from its mouth, south; again toward the Little Missouri river, whence the com mand will follo speeuily. The entire com mand is short of supplies, and unless other wise ordered, General Terry will march such as are not needed over to fort Abraham Lin coln. General Crook's command will scout towards the Black Hills and via Fetterman, home. Crook aud Terry both thiuk it too rlate for extended field operations. The In dians on the southern trail are believed to be making toward the agencies, and Terry will, if possible, intercept them. The cam paign is therefore practically closed, unless further instructions come lrom the lieutenant-general. kst. - Intelligence lias been received from New York that the beef which was shipped from the abattoir to England by the Canard steamer Abyssinia arrived in an excellent condition, and brought good prices iu the London and Liverpool markets. The meat was as fresh and tender as if killed only two days previously, and the Knglish cattle mer chants were amazed. The American beef was rapidly bought up at less thuu half the price charged for Euglish beef. Now that regular ice compartments have been provid ed on certain steamers, arrange in en t have been made for shipping five hundred cattle a week to England. The whaling bark Catalpa arrived at New York Saturday from New South Wales, bringing Michael Harrington, Thomas Dar ragh, James Wilson, Robert Cranston, Thom as Henry Hassett, John J. Breslin, alius Col lins, Thomas Desmond, alias Johnson, John King, alias Jones, and Thomas Brennan, alias Hall, escaped Fenians. They were wel comed by their old comrades with hearty greeting, and taken to O'Donovan Rossa's hotel. Among those who met them was William Foley, who had served ten years penal sentence for treason, aud knew them all intimatlev rOREIUR. The coroner's investigation into the death of Mr. Bravo is convulsing all Eng- 1 A land. lie was the husband of a young and handsome rfoman, who is suspected of kill ing her first husband, and who, after her marriage with Bravo, fell in love with one j Dr. Gully. The evidence indicates that Bravo was poisoned by antimeny furnished by Gully and administered by Mrs. Bravo. The counsel for the defense, several in num ber cost the defendants an aggregate of 275 per day. This fact alone makes it difficult determine when the case will close. Earl Russell has addressed a letter to Lord Granville on the eastern question, which he says: "It seems to me that to I we ought, with our fleet at Besika and our am bassador at Constantinople, to insitt on an instant termination of tne attrocities prac ticed in Bulgaria and other parts of Turkey. A thousand men landed from our fleet would accomplish the object, aud if they fail, they might be reinforced. Ultimately, if we can not keep the Turks from being barbarous and cruel, we might ally ourselves with Rus sia, and concert means to accomplish our objects. The whig party toast is, 'Civil and relicious liberty all over the world.' From this cause 1 shall not depart." Disraeli has no children to inherit his earldom. He is wealthy. Besides his own fortune, he has received In bequest from ad mirers about $200,000, and he has for some time received a pension of $10,000 a year from the government as au ex-minister. Further reinforcements will be dis patched from Madrid to Cuba at the end of September. A PERPLEXING MAUICIAN. H'ondrrfal Feat or a Newly Arrived Frrnrb PrnlMlcltatcnr. New York World. M. Marius Cazeneuve is a small gen tleman with a large head and fingers, whose dexterity would shame the most energetic shuttle in any woolen mill the country boasts of. He is owner of innu merable gold badges and testimonials of bis art, five of which he exposed on his nimble person last week. He appears even to deadheads in full evening costu me, ind combines in his deportment the grace of a Frenchman with the volubili ty of a lanitee. A small table having leen arranged directly under the noes of the investigating audience. M. Cazeneuve appeared smiling behind it with nothine in his looks to warrant a belief of his league with the devil.though a hundred years ago, he would certainly have been burned ere the evening was over lor just some such doubtlul rela tionship. Picking up a pack of neat, French playing cards, he first began his dev iltry by holding them under the nose of a reporter, ana while yet their lresh, clean smell was in the nostrils of that gentleman, causing them to disappear, subsequently extracting them from the inside or his coat. Ihia was only child s play, however. Une or two reporters being found willing to touch the cards after some persuasion, a few were drawn from the pack, looked at and replaced. A, salver containing dice-box and dice was next passed around, and as these gentlemen threw the dice it became a horrible reality that the total numbers of their throws recorded exactly the nu merical position from tne top of the cards they had drawn and replaced. A gentleman who was said to represent the Uaily ltness handled the dice-box in an ague manners but, shake it as he would, he could not avoid the supernat ural result. The next demonstration waseven more lerplexing. A blank card was handed the spectators upon which they were re quested, one alter the other, to place four mimericals ; the total amount thus set down amounted to 19,547, upon which the reporter of the World opened, not without trepidation, a sealed envelope that had previously been intrusted to his care, and lo! the self-same product, 10.517, appeared written in plain charac ters within. At this point there might have been a wholesale conversion to spiritualism or almost any doctrine pro posed, had not the macigian candidly informed his audience, in excellent French, that he claimed not to do the mvsterious or unnatural. The slight-of- haud tricks of M. Cazeneuveare not, how ever, his only stock in trade. He has a tolerably good memory, which serves him in some stead ; to illustrate : He handed to three gentlemen in the audience three books, the "Chronologie University," "('ours Astronomic," and "Tablette Chronologiques de L'Histoire Univer sale," volumes each of several hundred pages ; to several other gentlemen he next intrusted a dozen or two playing cards, toothers be gave dominoes and lotto counters. Having distributed these good gifts, he begged the gentlemen with the books to open a page each at random, upon which he gazed pensively for the space of a moment, ana then visiting the other holders was allowed a momentary glance at the faces of their cards, their dominoes and lotto counters. Shaking his head then several times, as if to shake into the several cells of memory the va rious inventoriesof his outstanding stock, he begun a recital of the list, first re peating the entire pages that had been opened to in the books, and next, telling accurately the cards and dominoes, etc., held by each of the gentlemen by whom they were held. This did appear a trifle perplexing, as the gentlemen who held the cards, dominoes, etc., had been al lowed to draw them from the box and pack themselves, and as the nature and size of the books used made it appear to the average mind a lite study to commit to memory any portion of them. After this a little recess was taken, the audience having the pleasure of realizing that at any given date in the tuture M. Cazeneuve could without difficulty in form them or their friends of the precise number of beer glasses emptied and cock tails consumed. The second portion of the entertain ment introduced a simple little trick. one or the audience was given a sealed envelope to hoid, while another gentle man proceeded to unwind a ball of string which was presently cut by the shears of the magician: in the meantime cards and dominoes had been passed around, various people helping themselves, and behold after all this, when the sealed en velope was opened, there appeared a written statement of the exact length of the cord cut at random and a list f the cards, dominoes, etc., chosen among the audience. After this it was no matter of treat surprise when another double sealed envelope was found to contain a paper upon which various parties had written whatsoever they pleased, and which they had subsequently seen de stroyed in the flames of a sulphur match. The performance concluded with the celebrated box mystery. Mme Cazen euve under cover of a screen, succeeding in getting inside of a trunk, which, tied and sealed up, was placed inside of an other also secured, in the space of forty seconds, several seconds quicker than the best time ever made by any spiritually assisted pe'rfonner. M. Cazeneuve pro pose soon to apjear before the public, whom he intends toenvert finally and forever from all belief in spiritualism. Occasionally barbers get hold of a poor quality of bay rum, and when such is applied to the face of a man just shaved it smarts like fire for a few moments. A case of this kind occurred in one of our barber shops, the other day. "Whoop! hld! holy Moses!" yelled the man, springing wildly from the chair, and clasping his burning cheeks with both hands; "ym may skin me that's all risht but I'll be essentially cussed if I'm going to have pepper-aauce rubbed ou it afterwards! Jow, you hear me!" HERALD COLUMBIA, TENNESSEE, FRIDAY, OUR MINISTER'S SERMON. The minister said last night, said he : " Don't be afraid of givin'; If vour life ain't worth nothln' to other folks, Why, what is the use of linnp ?' And that's what I say to my wife, says I, There's Brown the mis'raole sinner. He'd sooner a beggar would suurre than giTe A cent toward buying dinner. 1 trfl you oar minister in prime, he is, Rut I MinMn't tinilA HptprminA. When I he vd him a givin' it right and left, Just who was hit by bis sermon. Of course there couldn't be no mistake When he talked of long winded prajnn', For Peters and Johnson, they sat and scowled At every word he was sayin'. And the minister he went on to say, There's rarious kindsof cheatin'. And religion's as good for every day. As it is to bring to meetin'. I don't think much of the man that gives The loud amen at my preachin', Aad spends his time the ollowin' week In cheatin' and over reachla'. I guess that dose was blttor enmigh For a man like Jones to swallow ; But I noticed he didn't open his mouth, Not once after that to holler ; Hurrah, says I, for the minister Of course I said it quiet Give us some more of this plain talk, It's very refreshing diet. The minister hit 'em every time, And when be spoke of fashion, . And riggin's out in bows and things, As womans ruling passion, And coming to church to see the styles, I couldn't help a wlnkin' Andanudgin' my.wife.aodssysl, "That's you, And I guess it set her thinkin'. Savs I to myself, that sermon's pat, But man is a queer creation. And I'm much afraid that most of the folks Won't take the application. Now, If he had said a word about My personal mode of sinnin', I'd have gone ta work to right myself, And not set there a grinnin . Just then the minister says, says he, " And now I've come to the fellers Who've lost this shower by usin' tneir friends As a sort o' moral umbrellas. Go home," says he "and find your faults. Instead f huntin' vour brothers'. Go home," says hn, " and wear the coats You've tried to fit lor others." My wife she nudged, and rirown he winked, And there was lots o' smilio', And lots a lots o' look in' at our pew, It sot my blood a biiin'. Savs I to myself, our minister is gettln' a little liitter, I'll tell him, when the meetin's out, that I Ain't at all that kind of a critter. Nnc Haven JUgUter. to i KNOWN AT LAST. BY PHILIP KOl'KKE MARSTON. From Harper's Bazaar. A June night: such a June night! warm, blue, and breathless, and moon lit. I am sitting alone in the dear old London garden, and the canal which runs by the end of it. silvered by moon light occasionally darkened by the shadow of a passing barge, looks quite so t and Italian. Papa has had a few gentlemen to din ner, and till they are satisfied with wine and politics, I prefer the garden to the drawing room the garden full of moon light and the searching scent of the thorn. I am not long, however, to enjoy my solitude, for here is a step close by me, and a glimmer of a cigar. "Ah! Miss Paisely?" says a low musical voice with which I am very fa miliar. " Did you take me for a ghost ?" I said laughing. " Hardly. I never yet heard of a nhost wearing flowers. I left the dining room before the others because I wished to liae a few minutes' gerious talk with you." " Oh, don't be serious," I cry, piteous ly, and making a wry face. "Oh, put by jesting," he rejoins, in rather a weary tone of voice ; " after this I shall make no further exactions upon your time or mood. ' My vanity is wounded, and I say, sharply, " I can be as grave as the most of people when the occasion requires it; but there are persons who mistake mo roseness for gravity and good spirits for heart lessness." " Very likely," he goes on, hardly heeding my sally; "but I have not come to defend my own conduct, but rather to plead for another. I am going I am going to speak about mv j'oung friend Hamilton. Look here, llhoda Paiselv. you may nirc with ninety-nine men.and. though it may hurt your vanity to hear it, do them no lasting harm : but with the hundredth it may be different : you may at last drive him to madness or per- TT -1. I . . n . anion. Hamilton is one ot the finest young fellows that ever lived." " An excellent young man, doubtless," I put in, with some thing of a sneer. ?sot noticing the interruption : " He is, I know, not generally attractive to women, r rom a boy he has been physi cally very delicate ; his nature is hijrh- strung and nervous. Now you know he loves you. "Indeed, you flatter me," I say, look ing down to hide a blush, which I fancy (though I know really it is not visible in the darkness) can not escape his gray, penetrating eyes. But he says, quietly, " You can not evade me; you know he does. Now what I will have from you is this : How will you answer when he puts to you the supreme question of his life? Silent ! But I demand an answer." " And I command you to desist from your present impertinence, an-i to leave me," I cry, springing up in a passion, and flinging far from me the rose with which I had been toying; "and if you are a delegate from your friend, he has indeed been unfortunate." " Ne, upon my honor I am not that," he rejoins, earnestly. Then he stands aside and bows gravely as I sweep past. I hasten u the drawing-room, and soon the gentlemen come in. William Hamilton comes over to where I am sit ting. He is certainly handsome, though not in a way attractive to us women ; tall and slight, with an aristocratic, mo bile, though somewhat feminine face, lit up by large, aofr, melancholy eyes; bis hands, beautifully fashioned, are thin al most to transparency. He leans with his arm on the back of my chair and begins talking about some book he has given me. To all his questions I reply with warmth and animation. Colonel Gordon is observing us; his face always bright ens when he hears me talking less frivo lously than is my wont. I cannot help contrasting the two friends; the younger and so much the younger, too so fair and fragile ; the elder, certainly not at all handsome, but strong of limb and broad of chest, with the dark resolute face, worn and beaten by the storm wind of the world. I think I make myself very agreeable to poor Mr. Hamilton. We sit by ourselves all th evening apart in a corner of the room, apparently lost in one another, till something he says puts me out of tune, and I leave him in a tiff, poor fellow. Only, when he is go ing away, I am so sorry for him that I can not resist saying, " I hope you do not think me too quarrelsome ?" Then I look up piteously in his face and cast another look of proud defiance at his friend. Soon our little gathering breaks up, and I am glad that the evening is at an end. Another superb day, just as hot and cloudless as yesterday : but in spite of the beautiful weather, and all the roses in the garden, I got up feeling cross and out of spirits. Am I merely a flirt? something too light and frivolous? A woman, I think, should be something better. After all, Col. Gordon was right, and when I see Mr. Hamilton again I will show him firmly but kindly that he baa no reason to hope. I am somewhat comforted by this resolution, but I have no will to read books or to pay visits. I have no mother, and I am an only child, so my life is rather solitary.' t somehow the day wears itself away, and at six o'clocck, punctual as the time itself, comes the quick familar ring, and X hasten to meet my dear ol4 fathet after his omciat duties, l over mehim by kisses and complaints. Ch, i am so glad you nave come back!' I say ; " I have been horribly dull I and hasn t it been hoti no cool cornr in the house, and no shade in the gard Hejreturns my kisses affectionately. but b? looks so grave that 1 say. anx iouslj: " Iianvthing the matter, dear?" " "ifes ; I have very sudden and bad news' he answers, taking me into the dinnijg-room and stroking my hair with his datr hands. " Young Hamilton is dead a was found dead this morning in his beV " It appears he was always sub ject tOjheart complaint. 1 met Uordon in thektreet, who gave me the sad news. Poor fellow, he seemed quite broken down.f I am terribly stricken, uead I i say the wotd over and over again, yet can not resize the full meaning of it. But when I go to' bed I tu rn my face to the wall.'ol which one long ray of moonlight is playkig, and sob as if my heart would break ; aud yet I know I did not love him. O. soft melancholy eyes! Per haps isot melancholy now, but glad and rtdiantand full of a new triumphant lierht. O. poor troubled heart! That has. I hope, found rest. But I think of the little kind things I might have said and done, and of all the things said or done so much better left undone. Well, the tedious summer days go by, We never see Col. Gordon now; he seems to have given us up; even papa seems to wonder at his silence. One hot August day we leave noisy, dusty Lon don behind and take wing for the conti nent. We have got over the first shock of poor Mr. Hamilton's death, but I am not quite what I was, and I think if Col. Goidon could see me now he would think me less frivolous. I have a half hope that we may meet him in our wan derings. I look anxiously at all the hotels into the books of the visitors. where his name is not registered, and after two months of mountain and sea air we come back to the old London, the old house, and the old life. We have been home a week ; to-day papa has got to his office occupations again, and to day I feel terribly sad and cheerless a sadness which all things around me tend to deepen ; the rustle of dead leaves on the garden paths, the moan ings of the wind in the lealless! branches, the cold gray aspect of the sky. Is there nothing 1 should like to do ? I think, a3 I wander rest lessly between the garden and the house. Ah ! ves, there is one thing ha.-e always intended to do, and why not to-day? 1 gather a nosegay of au tumn flowers out of our own rrarden knowing that, if living, that would have pieaied him most, and l set out on my pilgrimage. They have laid my lover to rest at Norwood, in the dim vaults away under the church. As 1 walk up be tween the long rows of tombs a chill rain begins tailing, beating m my face ; but I do not feel frightened or lonely in this capital ot the dead, nor do 1 shrink as, lit bv a faintly glimmerine taper, I fol- i j ii - rj? -- - i ii low uown me winding staircase into me sad populous resrion below, thoueh shiver at the dank air, in which death seems to become almost palpable. My guide looking carefully at the names, tn- per in hand, stops before one. I signify to him that 1 would be alone tor a lew minutes, and he retires. I bend down and read the inscription: "William Hamilton, born May 17, 1851 ; died June y, 1873. He gi veth his beloved sleep.' " Is it indeed sleep for him, and unmarred by any dreams; 1 think or how be loved me and that love which I held so lightly and the plenteous tears come. But here is a step. The custo dian of the place coming back, I sup pose. 1 raise my lace hurriedly, and meet the dark well-known eyes of colonel tjorden ; but they have in them a milder, sweeter look than I have ever seen there before. He takes my hands in his and holds them, looking long and lovingly at the inscription on the cothn We do not speak a word, but we leave the place together and come out in the gray windy light of the fading d&y. He draws my arm in his, still holding my hand, and we walk a little ways in si lence. At lenght, he says, very kindly, " Thank you for this, llhoda ; I did not know vou loved him so much. " Stop," I say, " I am very sorry for him, I leel so grateful that ho should have cared for me ; but in the way you mean I never loved him. All you said to me that night was right and true, and I have been better for it." " No harm has been done," he rejoins; "and if he died thinking you loved him, he died happier. But you are not look ing well. Is anything troubling youi" " No ; I am not happy ; and now he has gone, I have no one who I think really loves me." " You are mistaken there," he replies quietly. " Don't you know that I love you ? and then more to himself than to me " as my life, as my soul. I loved you, llhoda, from the first day I saw you ; but then he loved you too, and he was so unable to buffet the waves of this world, if you could have loved him and made his life happy well, dear, you understand. I have said more than I meant to say; consider some of it un said ; only remember, if ever you should want a iriend, you will know where to come; and," he adds, with rather i sad smile, " I will not even in jest ask you to become my wife." " Because you consider me so worth less?" " Because I will not give you the pain of saving no." " Because you will not give me the joy of saying yes." "That could not be, ne replies, witn almost childish incredulity in his voice: " why, I am fifteen years older than you. "And it it were iwice mat, it, wouia be nothing," I reply, warmly. "But must you beat all the pride out of me ?" He turns 'round now and jaces me, laying his hands upon my shoulders, while I gaze into his eyes so frank and featless. " ltemember," he says, iu a solemn voice, "the place from which we have iust come, remember all that is at stake, and then tell me if you can say from the bottom of your Heart I love you." Mv heart does not falter as I echo his last words, and I know that he will never ask me that question again at least lor the want of confirmation. He folds me . . , . in his arms, and, rjenaing uown, Kisses my lips long and passionately. "I came in here," he says, " one of the weariest men in all God's earth, and now I am surely the most blessed." We go back . .... 1 ! w . to Lndon, both nappy, ooin supremely happy; and as we drive home through the shrieking London streets, I shudder to think how nearly I had missed the great peace and happiness of my life. He had kept nis secret, maniuny ; dui, thank God ' it had been known at last, and not too late. The World's Stock or Coin. The stock of coin in the commercial world is put down as follows : YtarA.D. Stock qf Coia. Authority 17m 1.4l",n),ino Jarob. iwv. l.fi.7,ori.ftfcO Gorboux . 2..w,rtm.nn M'Cnlloch 172. .. .vno,Vrt Ernest Seyd. U7K 4,.lJU. Of the four billion dollars of coin in existence iu 1876, Ernest Seyd estimates that at least two billion three hundred million dollars aT infgold alone. Not far from one-third of the annual produc tion of gold and silver is consumed in the arts, for domestic purposes, and by wear and friction. The other two-thirds pass into circulation as money, say one hnn dree million dollare annually. AN D SEPTEMBER 8, 1876. A HEROINE OCT OF LUCK. Career of m Wealthy, Roi Homely Female. New York rimes. antic and Another warlke adventuress has come to grief. This time it is not doctor and major Mary Walker, of American fame, nor the American princes Sabn-Salm who befriended the Hapsburg emperor of Mexico. The new heroine is Mile. Mer cus, a young lady of Dutch birth, who has been playing the mixed part ot Joan of Arc and Florence Nightingale in the foervian war. 1 he exGentnc young per son is said to have been endowed with a large fortune, the accumulated savings of the thrifty Hollanders, her ancestors. Most likely, in some Dutch boarding school she read the life and adventures of La Pucelle, or she may have read Jueadie s dime novels, surreptitiously con veyed to her under cover ot ber bread and butter, or in her weekly washing; such, we believe, being the custom with all ill-regulated female students, b ired by the example of the Alaid of Orleans, intoxicated by visions of glory which the careers of the empress Helena and Flor ence Nightingale brought into her imagi nation, Mile. Mercus made up her mind to strike for liberty and a career. No sooner was she emancipated from the re straints ot a boarding-school and the thraldom of pantalettes than she started out, as we should say in America, " on her own hook." Here, at least was one woman who not only had romance and onnortunitieshutJolentv of monev. lho first duty of Mile. Mercus was to 1 1 ii - - . build a temple at Jerusalem. 1 his vo tive ofTering was probably intended to im part a sort of religious tone to her future career, and earn for ber the reverence of the christian world. The temple, which is still extant, is described aa being something unique in architecture. It was designed and executed by some Bel gian (but not profane) 31 u lieu, it was rected near the monument which marks the spot where our Savior's tomb is sup pose to have been. At an age when most girls are flirting in the surf, or prinking before a mirror, Mercus was up to her eyes in mortar and masonry at Jerusa lem. This pious work cost her about $75,000, but it failed to awaken for her that holy enthusiasm which she had ex pected. Not long after this the troubles in t ranee engaged ber attention and 6he threw her womanly influence as well as her cash, on the side ef the communists. She wore a Phrygian cap on special occa sions, and was quite as ready to play the part of the goddess of reason as she had been to be offered up a sacrifice to Moslem hate, if the 1 urks bad reararded her with other feelings than those of blank amazements. She approved, in a judicially bloodthirsty way, ol the mur der of the hostages, and thought the sacrifice of the archbishop of Paris a very proper act. It is hardly necessary to add that this portion of her career has made enemies for her in Paris. And the gossips of that wicked city do not hesi tate to say that Mercus is more like Lola Montez than the maid of Orleans, except that Mercus does not pretend to be adan seuse. Various other dreams of fame absorbed the energies and dollars of this extraordi nary young woman, but ber taste for glory and gunpowder usually led her to the devious verge of battle fought wher ever there was a speck of war. When the Herzegovinians broke into hostilities, she emulated the example of a well known American female, and aspired to the command of a military force. She promised to raisie a battery for the insur gents, and intrusted twelve hundred pounds to a gentleman for the purchase of guns. This person, with the heartless duplicity of the sterner sex, put the money in his pocket, and went on a pleas ure excursion, lrom which he had not, at last accounts returned. Mile. Mercus was not discouraged, and she yet possess ed half a million dollars. The Servian invasion promised more excitement than the Herzegovinian affair; besides, she had failed to get her artillery command She built a hospital atShabatz, forty-four miles west ot Belgrade, and went into the Nightingale and Geneva Cross business with great spirit. She seems to have combined political instruction with nurs ing and medical attention. hile she bound up the broken beads of Servian soldiers, she pit ached republi canism, ihe variety ot republicanism which Mercus brought from the Paris commune is not lashionable in feervia, where the ruler, though not a fnll-fledged sovereign, is nevertheless a prince of the blood royal. A cable dispatch tells us that this modern and revised edition of Joan of Arc has been taken to Belgrade with a view to her expulsion from Ser vian territory. This is an ignoble ending to such an exceedingly lively career. Doubtless the young lady would prefer a littly romantic martyrdom, just now, for the sake of keeping up appearances to the end. But the days of burning at the stake, like the days of chivalry, are now no more, the most that the t?er- vian government could do for her would be to conduct her to the frontier, or to swear her and let her go, as we should have dons under similar warlike circum stances. Unhappily, the lady, though rich and under thirty, is not pretty; and as she is small and dark-faced, it is not likely that she could coax a job out of an American congress, or wheedle an aged philanthropist into posing lor his statue, if she should choose art rather than war as a field of adventure. We may well be sorry for Mercus. She had good in tentions, and if she has failed as a vol unteer skirmisher on the battle held, she may console herself with the reflection that she is not the first who has seen men shut the gates of honor on womankind. Beautiful Jewesses at Long Branch. Gath in Cincinnati Enquirer. Long Branch is the place for beautiful Jewesses. They grow fair in skin, yet preserve all their splendid contrasts of nc eyebrows and oriental eyes aim tresses here. Domestic, well appetized, taking their leisure most philosophically, thev make willing mothers, and at mid dle life are troubled with nothing mor than excess of flesh. There is a hotel called Jauch's at the Branch, pronounced Yoek, where the middle class family He brews stop among French and a medley of foreigners. As it is a good place for bachelors, having meals a la carte, I stopped there a week and made, after a fashion, a trip to the Holy and. The husbands and lovers arose at half-past fiv hat.hed with their faces towards the east or their heels in the air, and, taking only a cup of coffee, darted off to New 1 OrK. All IXU v "" -. v. mother was up looking lor her boys, who were chasing the rig or the torn cat across tne jawn. iue uiicij vmmri was reading a novel, or practicing a min strel ballad down at the piano, or flirting with a christian with a pocket handker chief. They breakfasted light and went off to bathe in plain muslin or bunting dresses, blue being a favorite color. Emerging from tne Dam nouse, ciau in hifiirrated blue trimmed with white, the daughter of Judith stands, and, as in the olden story, she drives the nails in the temples ox lioioiernes, dui is now imiy a toe-nail ; for we see her milk-white feet, turned at the tips like the shell of an ivory enail, planted on the sand like the base of a recovered sphinx. There she is, fresh as the riddle the sphinx pro pounded, and older than its creation in tha undiminished vigor of her race. Sh stands the type of Miriam with her tabor and Mary with her Joseph. Uieo natra is dead and all the sons of Anthony, and in their place there rules a turban and a Turk. But the gold that ratbt sustain his tottering power and ours is the thrift of the wandering Jew. lie truvpla from land to land with gold dust jn his garments, his wife with diamonds MAIL. hidden iu her mouth. They are cast out of cities; they lend to kings. Antagon ized for ages, they have yielded at last to tne soitening innuence oi toieranou and kindness. Assured against molesta- tion, they have became holder of land and lots in the cities of the new world They held about one-third of the best real estate in the city of New York ; their synagogues lift their rich facades to the light, where the Moorish horse-shoe and bulbous domesof silver gilt are inter mixed with texts' of chaldean. Many of them give liberally to build christian churches and to christian charities, but in worship and in marriage their faith fulness seldom wavers. We agitate to keep the Sabbaths we will not keep, but silently and not to proselytize, the Jew puts up his shutters on his own seventh day, and loses the lucre of two Sabbaths without a whine. The Jewish maiden takes her bath, and as she leaves the water, with her clothes clinging to her, she is stalwart as a section of Solomon's temple. Her thick, black hair is fit for bow-strings; like shafts of cedar are her limbs. She lunches heartily on cold meats and a bottle of beer, and goes up and dresses for her lord. When ho arrives in the stage she is on the piazza wearing a vel vet dress with an overdress of lace cur tain, a Maria Stuart collar, big diamonds in her ears, and a straw hat lull of illu sion pinned down with a tulip of gold and carnelian. They address each other in three or more languages during the same sentence, being true cosmopolitans, and in a minute the carriage is up for a drive. That night, about ten or eleven of the clock, they are eating the entire rassover lamb, drinking champaign, and laughing like the happiest people in the world, all dressed richly, bareheaded, taking the world for all it is worth. CHAMPAWXE. How It la HlHde and Where Ihe Real I'M be Found. London Saturday Review It is not, of course, to be expected that the finest champagne should be givenon ordinary occasions ; this would be a throwing of pearls to people who had no time or opportunity to judge their lustre properly. Indeed, when one considers the labor and skill employed in the mak ing of the finest champagne, one is apt to think that, according to a French fash ion, they should be d'unk only after din ner, when it is possible to give compara tively uninterrupted consideration to their merits. The grapes from which champagne is made are almost entirely the black and white Burgundy two thirds of the black, roughly speaking, be ing used to one-third of the white in the making of sparkling champagne. Very line champagne can be made only from the black grapes that are grown in certain favored districts, such as Ay ; but the wine made from white grapes only is, though it gives a fine flavor, de ficient in body, and would be too light and acid if used alone. In the cham pagne country the process of cuttingand paring the grapes is simple enough, as the grapes, being of good substance, do not require the very delicate handling found necessary in other districts. The branches ars carefully inspected, and, when all unripe and rotten berries have been removed, they are put under the press,, a powerful machine worked by hand, and made, with the exception of an iron screw, entirely of wood. It may be pleasant news to some champagne drinkers that the treading out of the grapes by barefooted or leather blioed men and women, practiced in seme dis tricts, is not here employed. After the pressing the wine is put into a large vat, where it is allowed to ferment for from twelve to eighteen hours, after which it is drawn off into casks, where a second fermentation takes place. Up to this time the wine is pure fer mented juice of the grape, but, if lottl-d in this condition, the wine would lie still, and to give it the required sparkle the addition of sugar is necessary. The nec essary amount of this element is deter mined by means of an instrument which discovers the quantity of saccharine orig inally contained in the wine,the quantity lost in the fermentation, and conse quently the amount which has to be added. It vs ill be seen that the use of this instrument requires great experi ence, care and skill. The saccharine used for the finest wines is composed of the purest white cane candy dissolved in fine old wine reserved for the purpose, while for the commoner wines coarse sugar and spirits are used. After the preparation of the wine in caks, brilliancy is given to it by the process of " fining" with pure isinglass, and after that it is ready for bottling about the month of May af ter the vintage. It is stowed away in deep cellars in stacks of from ten to thir ty thousand bottles, from any part of which stacks a single bottle can be re moved at any time for examination without disturbance to the pile in which it is laid. Although the wine is perfectly bright when bottled, it soon throws down a sed iment which must be removed before the wine goes into the market. In order to ef fect this the bottles have to remain in a horizontal position for a year or more ; wheji it has been ascertained by a care ful examination of the bottles that this has taken place, they are put in wooden racks with the necks slightly de pressed, so that the sediment slides toward the ccrks, and each bottle is gent ly agitated at stated intervals by prac ticed hands, who,itissaid,can,aftersoini experience, shake several thousand bot tles a day. Vith every shake the moutlm of the bottles become more depressed, until they stand nearly on one end, when the sediment is settled in the neck of the bottle close to the base of the cork. In this position the bottles remain un til the wine has to be prepared for con sumption by the process of getting rid of the sediment, or, to use the technical term, "disgorging." This is done by a skilled workman, who takes each bottle, and with a special instrument strips off the iron clip which holds down the cork, when the pressure of the fermenting wine forces out the cork and with it the sedi ment. The wine is allowed for a second or two to froth over in older to cleanse the neck of the bottle of all impurities ; the bottle is then placed on a frame un der an upright stopper, which checks all further waste oi gas or wine. ine in this state is termed brut, and is abso lutely dry and sugarless to the taste ; there are some people who have, and some who anect, a taste ior cnampague in this condition which only the wines of the finest vintages can support. It is therefore ntcessary for general purposes to add to the wines in bottle at this point a certain further amount of saccharine. the quantity of which is determined by various circumstances, cuiei auiuug which are the quality of the wine itself and the quality of the maiket to which it is destined. It is irratifving to know that the least quantity of saccharine is used for the English market, and that therefore finer champagne is, as a rule, to be found in England than elsewhere. While three per centum of saccharine is used for th first and from eight to ten lor the second quality of champagne sent to England, eighteen to twenty per centum is needed to catch the taste of German, American and even French champagne drinkers. It is obvious that fine wine disguised with this amount of sirup has no chance ot ascertaining its true merit, and it is natural that the purveyors of champagne should pay some attention to this lact. And it Is therefore fair to conclude that be who wishes to possess the finest champagne had better look for it in the English rather than in any other market. At the fame time, a often happens, VOL. XXII. NO. 0. where the best, there also is the worst to be found. The fashion of drinking good champagne as a festal wine has led to the j custom of supplying what it is hoped may I pass for good champagne, and what may I be a harmless preparation of cider or some other indigenous egervescingliquid, or a harmful compound imported from abroad. A year or two ago there was a kind of panic a? to ball-room champagne, when it was suggested that petroleum was largely employed to poison unsus pecting people under the guise of hospi tality ; and this panic was the exaggerated expression of a fear which had some foun dation. It is not difficult to produce imitations of champagne, if not by the agency of pe troleum, oy that of, among other things, chloroform water, which, like many other chemicals, has been pressed into the Rervice of ordinary tradesmen. It is per haps not surprising that many people should waste their substance in "the pur chase of riotus and spurious champagne. But it might be well for such in-ople to consider that fine wines produced bv such processes as we have described are of necessity costly. And they might with advantage turn their attention to the ex istence of cr-rtaTh sparkling wines which cost little, and yet have the exhilerating and harmless qualities of fine champagne without, of course, its delicate savor, such as the Austrian Voslauer or the French Vouvray. The Explosion at II11 Uale The En tire Mass to (Jo at One Time. N. Y. World. The great explosion at Hell Gate is now certain to take place during the lat ter part of September, and contrary to reports which have been generally cir culated the entire mass of rocks will be demolished by one terrific explosion. The work of tunneling and boring is now ended, and nothing remains undone ex cept the preparation and insertion of the cartridges. The tunnels radiating from the main shaft, and likewise those crossing them, are all cleared out, leaving the upper crust of rock supported on one hundred and seventy-two piers, each eight feet square, but varying in heigth from twen ty feet near the shaft to ten or twelve feet near the outer circumference. In the roof of rocks thus formed S,.r()0 holes have been bored in an upward direction, ranging in depth from three to eleven feet, with a uniform diameter of three inches. These holes will be the recepta cles of the explosive material, which will be dynamite where the rock 13 hardest and ordinary vulcan powder where the superincumbent mass is more friable and easier to blow to pieces. As the floor of the tunnel slopes outward from a depth of thirty two fet to fortv feet below low water, and the depth ot water required for navigation in the neighborhowd of New York is only twenty-six feet at mean low water, it is plain that after the explosion and the subsequent dredging there will be ample room for the largest ships in the world to reach New York bay through the waters of the sound and thus make a saving of time on the voyage to and from Europe. Nitro-glycerene was for a time con templated as the most suitable explosive agent; but on mature consideration it was rejected, not only as being too dan gerous in the manufacture, but also be cause some of the charges are liable to slip out of the holes prepared for them, and in such an event nitro-glycerine would be liable to explode prematurely. Dynamite, which is composed of twenty five per cent, of clay and seventy-five ler cent, of nitroglycerine, was finally selected ; and it is calculated that each charge will break up twenty cubic yards, there being in or aliout seventy thou sand cubic yards in the entire mass to be exploded. A bomb-proof chamber has been prepared for the operators, at a distance of three hundred leet southeast of the main shaft and in the direction of tho Ravenswood road. In this chamber will be placed at least two hundred gal vanic batteries of the pattern known as Groves', and each of these will explode from seventeen to twenty charges. A most ingenious scheme has Iteen devised, by which all these batteries are brought into action at the same time, and then a complete circuit will be formed, setting off the entire 3,000 charges together, and utterly destroying the great plateau of rock which has made Hell Gate so dan gerous to navigators. General Newton has been unceasing in his exertions, and has kept up a constant series of experiments to insiiro perfect success when the great day comes; and there is no reasonable ground for fear of any untoward accident occurring. Ihe avistant cugineers, who will have practi cal charge ef the oieratious on the day of the explosion, will, according to the popular belief, be placed in a jxisition of great danger; hut this is only visionary, as the utmost foresight has been used to prevent any harm to the operators. 1 he engineers are of opinion the only apparent effect of the explosion will le the hurling into the air of a huge col umn of water, with perhaps some bits cf rock, as the as-istanceof the superincum bent water will prevent any except a few of the smnller masses from being ejected beyond the surface. . As soon as ever the explosion is over the work of dredging will begin, in order to throw the channel oien to navigation at the earliest possi ble moment. Sea ymphs anil Their Toes. From Georje Alfred Tow nsend's CaW Hay Letter to the Philadelphia Times. Stockings of blue, red and striped are worn this summer in the bath, knee high, with a coquettish little white seam down the side, as if it was a rip. What cun ning has not woman ! She is aware that heiTfbot is almost always inferior to a man's in grace and plant. A man stands like a marble statue, with the blue veins cut clearly ; a woman's foot is the trade mark of irresolution and only half devel oped, and th ' tees take hold of nothing. Iter big toe points upward and her little toe shrinks into the sand. The precise connection between woman and her squeal I could never ascertain. Origi nally, no doubt, when she was alone with Darwin, the squeal was all the language she had. Development came along and the caudal part ot the lady became an imperfect bunch of toes, while the object finally learned to articulate. Yet on all trying occasions she resumes the squeal runs up the line of breakers at Cape May, as the cold water strikes threo thousand ankles. Then we observe the uniformity with which every daughter of Thetis is armed in her corsets. Their diminished proportions confirm the story of Adam that it took only one of his ribs to make a whole woman. But these general de fections of form only make more admira ble the perfect of her sex. She is from Baltimore, and weighs about one hun dred and thirty pounds, at the age of sixteen. Her hair is a rich copper brown, flung loose like mane. Her feet and an kles are as white as the fleety soul of a billiard ball, which has invisible legs of ivory. She wears a suit of dark red, with a skirt and slender breeches, and dashing down the sands and into the soap suds of Mrs. Neptune, she hrarsthe email boy exclaim, perforce : " What a pretty daughter our washerwoman hasl" . "I jess see my gov'nor, boss ; the ole man my daddy. I ain't seed him 'fore for a long time, and he jess tole me how ole I is. I wants you to calcilate de ting for me. De old man ez I was born in 32. Now, how is er ?" " You mean 1832, Sam." " No, s a h ; no, sah ; 832 ; dat'a what de old man sez, and he knows." "Well, that will make you one thousand and forty-four .years old. "No! isdat so, boss? Well, well, dis chile is certaily ole." FACTS AM) FANCIES. Old age appears to overtake a fast man soonest. N. O. Rciblican. General Butler is a red ant In tho Massachusetts pantaloon leg. Danbury Newt. Authors are the vanguard in the march of mind, the intellectual back woodsmen, reclaiming from the idle wil derness new territories for the thought and activity of their hr.ppier brethren. Carlyle. ilVE or six months of married life, re marks a veteran observer, will often re duce a naturally irascible man to such a condition of angelic humility that it wouldn't be saf j to trust him with a pair of wings. The London Milk Journal says that a pint of milk heated a littie, but not boiled, taken every lour hours, will check the most violent diarrhoea, stom ach ache, incipient cholera, and dys entery. Man, picud man ! dressed in a little brict authority, most ignorant of what he is most assured, his glassy essence, like an angry ape, plays such fantastic tricks before high heavens as make the angels weep.- -ShaLspeare. A southerner, writing from Capo May to his home pur-cr, wonders why a Crudish girl who will dance with no one ut ber brother will run along the lieach "naked as to the knee," and kicking sand at her beau. It is said that in I7r0 George Wash ington sent to England for nine pounds of mixed candies, and this was at a time, too, when a girl would desert home, pa rents and kindred, and cling to a man for four pounds and a half. An Indiana girl wi-hing to see if her lover really loved her, hired a Ikiv to yell "mad dog" as they were walking alone. Careful lover juincd a fence and left, leaving her to be chewed up alone. She went oil' and married a dry goods clerk. " Mamma, if we cross the bridge at night must we pay loll?" "Of course, my dear ; why do you aik ?'' " Why, because the river has gone Lome lo sleep." " Oh, the liver never sleeps." " Then why has it a bed. mamma?" There are brains so large that Ihey unconsciously swamp all individualities which come in contact or too near ; and brains so small that thev cannot take in the conception of any other individuality as a whole, only in part or parts. Mr. Jamron. We Americans, who are all plain es quires, with here and there a general, or a colonel, or say a majah, can fiord to smile at our English cousins, who speak of Victoria as " the queen's most excel lent majesty," and of the little whiper snapper from France as " hi imperial highness, the prince iinerial." There are few plcnsanter sights in this selfish world than to see a coroner at a pic-nic urging, with all the warmth of disinterested friendship, the over-heated to drink freely of ice-water and passing the cucumbers and other cholera mix tures assiduously to his companions. A youno lady received the following note accompanied by a boiiouet ot llow- ers: "DEAR : 1 send vou ti the boy a bucket of flours. They is like mv love for yon. The nite shade menes kepe dark. The log fenel menes I am 3'ou slave. Posla red and jiosis puil, mv love for vou shall never fale." A generic difference. School girls out for a walk : First schoolgirl (sweet sixteen) I am so tired of walking along by twos and twos in this way! It's as bad as the animals going into the ark ! Second ditto (ditto ditto) Worse! Half of them were masculine 1 Let us play the fool ; with mirth and laughter let old wrinkles come, and let my liver rather heat with wine than my heart cool with mortifying groans. Why should a man whose blood is warm within sit like his grandsiro cut in ala baster, sle-p when he wakes, and creep into the jaundice of lx-ing jeevish. Shahprarc. NoTHiNd will supply the wi'nt of sun shine to peaches, and to make the knowledge valuable, you must hav the cheerfulness of wiwlom. Whenever you are sincerely pleased you are nourished. The joy of the spirit indicates it strength. All healthy thing-tare nweet temjered. Genius works in sport, and goodness smiles to the last. ICmerton. When f ioethe says that in every hu man condition foes lie in wait for us, "invincible only by cheerfulness anil equanimity," he does not mean that we can at all times le really cheerful, or at a moment's notice, but that the endeav or to look at the better side of things will produce tho habit, and t lint this habit is the surest safeguard agairi.it the danger of sudden evils. Lriyh Hunt. Every human soul has the germ of some flowers within, and they wouldoiien if they could only find suriHhine and free air to expand in. I always told you that not having enough of sunshine was what ailed the world. Make ltcojrle happy, and there will not be half the quarreling, or a tenth part of the wickedness thero w.Mr. L. M. Chill. When the president of the French re public and hero of Woerth and Sedan was run over by a cart, he no doubt ex jierienced feelings similar to those of tho American veteran who didn't mind dying, but thought it extremely hard to go through the battle of New Orleans and the Cherokee and Seminole wars, and then I "butted to death by a billy goat." Writing of a foolish little countess and other women, a Paris correspondent says: " Here was the jx tite brunett dressed plainly, yet as she stood she was worth in dry gooc's and jewels (omitting her bracelets) over $'J,HrO in her prom enade costume, not lo mention her other toilets. Worth has some lady clients who srcnd $12,000 a year lor dreis alone." There seem to be some jersons, the favorites of fortune and darlings of na ture, who are born cheerful. " A star danced" at their birth. It is no super ficial visibility, but a bountiful and len eiicent soul that sparkles in their eyes and smiles on their lips. Their inborn geniality amounts to genius their raro and difficult genius which creates sweet and wholesome character, and radiates cheer. WldpjiU. A mischievous quack in Altoona City, Penn., advised a young man with more hair than brain to ue molasses water, Ihe theory lciiig that after tie water evaporated the r hellions locks would coalesce and keep iu pla'. Ho made his toilet of a Sunday morning, arid taking a prominent jew, concentrated the attention f all the Ihe in the church, much to the relief and edifica tion of the congregation. Alter striking wildly about and damnginga palm-leaf in undue vehemence, he made a brek for the door with the flits swarming about his well-seasoneJ poll. Preachino ver;ji h Pkactice. Mrs. McGill, says the New York Post, sat in the parlor talking with the minister. "What I do love," said she,"isto see the children enjoy themselves." And yet when, a moment alter, a base ba'l came singing into the room, scattering the re mains of a fifty-cent gtas-i, do vou sup pose she leaned out ol the window and cried: "Here's your ball, darling, never mind the old glass " Not much. She sailed out the front door like a cyclone, and banged the head of the boy who owned the ball against the railroad until he thought the Fourth of July had ar rived two months ahead of l ime. They were sitting on the front porch enjoying the evening air and gazing at the canopy of heaven thickly ttidded with gliteiing star. "How incompre hensible," exclaimed Mr. Posonby, "i the vastness of nature! Each glittering orb of the myriads we now liehold is a sun more glorious than our own and the center of a grand planetary system, and their centers in their turn revolve around other centers still more magnifi cent. How wonderful are the eUrnal laws which hold this univer-te of worlds in tlieiruncbangingorbits, and " " Ves," said Mr. Posonby, "and the man didn't bring us half enough Ice to-day. and I'm ju!t certain that corned beef willsixiil be fore morning. Did you order those piack rel to-day?"