The Brookhaven ledger., February 08, 1883, Image 1

About The Brookhaven ledger. (Brookhaven, Miss.) 1875-1883

Image provided by: Mississippi Department of Archives and History

                
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NUMBER 6
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"Jl.
Aft olD OAltAZl ttHfr
\ pt«hee wa J »• back ay heutt
Since I cannot have thin* j
For tt-frao youra yon wfll not fact W5S
Why then nhouldat thou hay ml»»y Kl4
But novr X think oot let it he, wS$
To flnA it were In vain • * jHtt
For thou 'ft»thief la either ay* VfJfflSs
Would «'ce! tt btojk again.
Why BhouW two heartafn oaa bnaat Ua, , Ttlj
And jet not lodya together T M.
0 love I where la thy aympathy,
XI tbUH our breaata thou aevar t 1
Bat lore ieeuobstnjsteiy
j i uunottod It out;
For when I think I’m beat rasotveA
I then am in aaeat SeuMt
Then farewell care, and far*wad
, wiU no longer plna;
For m behove I have bar heart
• niUbll »'lptoirtaa _ i
-- ^ e~ to ■ fc ^
riro ohio auLtfra.
Capt. Martin Y an Buren iMyt, vhft
lives on »f*rm u°ar Seville, Ohio, is seven
feet eleven and one-half inches high, *n8
weighs 178 pounds. Mrs. Bates is seven
feet anil eleven inches high and weighs
413 pounds. It is a difficult matter to
' conveym adequate idea of tho propor
tions of such a dwelling as the one oeeti
pied by tho Ohio giants. A door that is
six fest six inches high is a 'large-sized
openis? hi the side of a house—that is,*
a dvvlling house, not a cathedral. But
the loors in the domicile of the Bates
gia.ts are ten feet high, and the knobs
art sourly as high as the average man’s
he'd. ■ .
Pho W"" was built by Capi Bates
i is'deguntly farnished. In
... nsot'
r. the spacious hall, the bed
c • i tho giants, a sitting-room
an id ' ; • • rior. The couch upon which
tin ;ple sleep was made expressly
for thi and it is a curio:dty to look at.
It • i. usive enough to give the great
pcoi.li r in to stretch in, and it looks
as big as »u ordinary-sized floor. It is
| r ,.Uy ten t long, wide in proportion,
1 about tivioo as high as a common
i *il. Tho magnificent dressing-case is
...,u a huge affair, with a glass upon it
nearly as big as tho side of u house. In
the ffldting-room is a piano of ordinary
size itself, but it is mouutod on blocks
two feet liigh, so that the instrument is
away Up ip the air, out of tho reach of
common folks. Thoxo are two rocking
chairs in this room-that are so big that
the reporter’had to climb up into one of
them the same as an infant would
clamber up into a “high chair." It is
very expensive for tho giants to live, os
they have to pay such an exorbitant
price for everything they wear. For in
stance, it costs the Captain §30 a pair for
boots.
It is a most astonishing sight to come
across the two giants out for a drive.
City folks who have seen the ponderous
wagons with wheels reaching to the sec
ond story of a house, used to haul stones
■weighing tons and tons, can form an idea
of the vehiclo used. It is pulled by six
stout Norman horses, and it is enough to
make a man think he has got ’em, snr),
tosuddenly meet such a spectacle on the
road out in the country. Passing wagons
have to let the rails down and drive
into the adjoining fields until the giants
goby.
TUB MUBAK-TU! IU-UBAIllS YOUNO
3IAtf.
There aro certain youths in this day
1 generation who consider Ihemsolves
ougbly proficient in the art suscep
They profess to know all the
lgs going on in the feminine
ThcBreak - Their-Hearts Young
of this class. Ho spends his
rushing the little flflttcrings of
to sex. His only aim in get
inted is for the purpose of de
the heart of his newly- made
i considers it very smart to
, ixoneyed words and act in a
, way so as to gain the affection of
oomfe unsuspecting girl. He breaks her
' i art, or tries to, for the fun of it. All
.e pair., sorrow and sadness which may
•suit frepi his conduct do not trouble
im in the least—that is the business of
ihe Break-Tlieir-Hcarts Young Man.
It is a fortunate thing that the Break
Their-Hearts Young Alan is very often
unsuccessful. Only sentimental girls,
as a general thing, are victimized by
him. Sensible girls abhor him, or else
toy with him for tho fun of it. He is
left severely alone by those who know
what affection really is. They seo
through him and know him to be a hol
low mockery. His character won’t
stand the least strain—it is too hypo
critical and unstable.
The Break-Their-Hearts YouDg Man
presumes he is a connoisseur in love
making. He is in reality a perfect ig
noramus. His conceit leads him to sup
pose he conquers when he is defeated.
He has no heart. If he woos at all, he
woos with his qlieek, and if ho wins at
all, it is by means of his overdrawn as.
gnrance. Tile Break-Thcir-Hearts
Young Man is a fop, a fool and a flirt.
If he was any one of these without the
others it would be bod enough, but as a
combination of the three ho is past en
durance. He ought to be broken un.
A SALIC JU T.
-faking was traveling in Missouri just
before the last Presidential election, and
ill tlie car, light across from him, two
joueu were arguing as to the probable re
sult of the election. Says one :
“Hancock’s the man.”
“No, sir. Garfloid’ll get it,” was the
reply.
.Suddenly an Adventist, sitting behind
them, spoke up and said :
“ My friends, do you know who is to
‘ be our next President? It is the Lord,
who is coming at once, with his angels,
to reign.”
Quick as thought, Jenkins, who im
agined that some third-party candidate
hod been mentioned, sprung np, slapped
the Millerite on the shoulder, and cried
out:
“Bet you $25 he don’t cany Mis
souri.”—Des Moines Mail.
ROGERS' REGRETS.
Samuel Rogers was not only a wealthy
banker and rural poet; he had also a
keen sense of humor, and there was
something in the deadness of his conn
tenance and the dryness of his ma
wWch teemed ■§£*» additional i
to Mis Barca* His dwellin
“cabinet of 1 he ket
household, « servants cop
sia&fatg ot « pe woman.
When cue beeu a long
time in his fed friend
called to eondol on
Joes he had ;aine j- cx.
claimed Rogers, ter listening
time to bis expressions of sympathy,
don’t know that I feci his loss so very
much after all. For the first seven years
be was an obliging servant; for the sec
UMXICAX Al)OBB no VMBS.
Qm Of the many distinctive features
*t a foreign people to attract a stranger
«B entering New Mexico is the adobe
(doba) castle of tile native. The srclii
teoture of the Mcxicun udobu is simple
anti primitive, being coustrnoted of qlay
and molded to suit the convenience and
taste at the owner. In«‘ho rural districts
‘of the Territory, by which is mount all
parte outside of, the half-dozen or so
ooauneroial centers, those ntud houses
raraly.if ever, exceed oue story in height, 1
and are constructed very much after the
pattern of the backwoodsman’s shanty,
with fiat roof, earth floor, otc. In the
three principal tqwna of Ihe Territory—
Santa Fe, Albuquerque and Las Vegos-r
the adobe very often assumes an impos
ing appearance, in some instances reach
ing two and even, i stories in height.
The clay bein isceptible of a smooth
finish, the nt many of these mod
ern adobes is ;nod in imitation of
granite, brick. such other pattern as
may best -suit the fancy of the owimr.
^ & ¥*» «* <W>ntryf6#(
attached a plaza, cither rear or front.
The well-to-do Mexican farmer or town
iitizen constructs hie residence close to
the design of a barrack or corral, with a
wall, from twelve to fifteen feet high,
iurrounding an area of ground suffi
ciently largo to meet the requirements of
liis household. The only entrance to
this iuelosnre is by a gateway.
Tlic several apartments of the family
vre arranged within and around the in
olosure, without other opening than a
door leading to the plaza or court-yard,
where a structure of mud from three to
•ix feet high and bearing a close re
•oiublance to a bee-llive serves for a bak
ery r.nd other kitchen purposes. By this
ityla of architecture the Mexican senor
■iot only draws^lie lino of custo, but is
protected from severe snow and sand
dorms that sweep over the Territory at
irregular intervals. These mud struc
tures si'o said to be very comfortable—
warm in winter and cold in summer. It
is claimed by tho natives that a properly
constructed adobo can be used with com
fort forseveuly-fivo or eveu 100 yearn.
a .v;;ir ir.iy to e^ise settee doos.
A citizen of our community has a fine
litter of setter dogs. He has been tak
ing special pains to giro them a good
start in the world, and to this end it was
iris custom to ri-c from his bed at short
intervals to feed them. It became rath
er tedious business for him to “ crawl
out” during the cold winter nights to at
tend to their wants, so he tried a new
plan. S-ttiug a pan of milk in a warm
corner behind the stove, he went to bed,
and, in the small hours, the young ca
nines called for food. Thinking to make
a good job of it, ho arose in the dark .
and carried the pan carefully to the wood
house, when, seizing each pup by the
nape ol the neck, he thrust its nose into
the pan, and, when all had “ got to their
work,” returned to his bod. The next
morning he was aroused by his wife,
who wanted to know what in the world
he had done with her bread-pan. In
vestigation followed ; his wife wet up a
batch of bread and set .it beliind the
stove to rise; this pan our “ shot ” had
oorried to the pups, and they, after
gorging themselves with the dough,
waddled back to their warm nest. The
yeast was good and the puppies rose,
looking like so many muffs with the
head of the animal u cd for trimming,
while their legs and tails resembled
waits on an early-rose potato. —Hender
son (Ky.) Tobacconist.
Type said to dato from tiie fifteenth to
the sixteenth centuries has been found in
ihe Fronoli river Suono. The letters ex
hibit great irregularity of construction,
being of all heights and having no
“nick.” In place of the latter there it
an oblique incision which showed the
compositor where was the top of the let
ter. The letters were perforated, prob
ably for the purpose of stringing a num
ber of them together and then tying
them.
A SHEAF OE FOREIGN PROVERBS.
People love truth, but invite the lie
to dinner.—Russian.
One hill cannot keep two tigers.—
Chinese. Equivalent of our “ Two of a
trade.”
The sea will settlo when it marries.—
Gaelic.
When the house is builded, death
enters ih.—Turkish. .
Heaven sends almonds to the tooth
less.—Nubian.
Thero wus never good or ill but woman
had to do with it.—Gaelic.
Wlmt a woman doesn’t know she’ll
hide.—Gaelic.
Steel likes to be called gray silver.—
Russian.
The meat is on the chopping-board.—
Chinese. Equivalent to “ the viotim is
powerless against his oppressor.”
It isn’t ruse alone, but the tooth, too,
that helps out the'fox.—Russian.
Wed no woman in whom you eon find
no flaw.—Gaelic.
nra vulxvuk or ruoas.
The “frog wl-o would a wooing go”
k now a native of the great republic
and his matrimonial leap ia taken across
the broad waters Which separate America
from Europe. lie descends from this
stupendous saltatory cxerciso, not upon
the Unsympathetic shores of Britain,
where his race is looked upon with
disdain, and oven aversion, but upon
thU hospitable and friendly shores of the
new republic in France, where his kin
has been appreciated warmly by gour
mands of every class. The Ugoro re
ports with much gusto the arrival of the
distinguished strangers, who are to be
introduced with due honor into the
breeding establishments which supply
the markets of the gay capital. The
Yankee frog is quite worthy of the
country in which his first mortal croak
is miyle. He is twice ns big as the well
known inhabitant of the mashes of the
Seine, whose delicate limbs sure so eager
ly bought up dy French epicures, and so
tjUintily served to table l»y the cordotjg
JL«*“OTtartKItr "Airgloa and flie Trois
Freres. . The precious consignment has
been received by the frog breeders with
unbounded joy, aud it is anticipated that
a skillful treatment of the new race will
infuse fresh virtues into the stock of the
frog ponds, so that in tune, by a careful
system of propagation, the legs of the
croakers supplied to the French restaur-_
ants will rival in size tho legs of chick
ens, which they are said to resemble in
flavor, and it will no longer be necessary
for the giver of a feast to ancriiico.a
holocaust of the expensive victims. It
seems, however, that the new-comers ore
all of the ruder sex. The Yankeo has
come a-wooing, and “whether his
mother would let him go or no” is still a
doubtful point. But, at any rate, neither
his mother nor his sister have accom
panied him to Europe. He will bo wed
ded to the wife or wives provided for
him in the French graiouiltcrcx, and we
sincerely liojw that he will “live happi
ly ever afterward,” and be the father of
an increasing and interesting family of
Franco-American crookersr,—London
Globe. ,
STUPID TKACH1XO.
There is a vast amount of humbug in
the system of common-school education,
and it is not strange that many parents
are adopting the plan of having their
children instructed at home, where they
can carefully watch the child’s training
and see that what time is devoted to in
struction is turned to good uccount. A
disgusted father writes to a Philadelphia
journal saying tlrnt the other day ho
heard his little girl sobbing over a rule
which she was trying to commit to mem
ory, in the following words, to-wit:
“Buie for short division, rule dash
one write the divisor ut the left of the
dividend, semi-colon, begin at the left
hand, comma, and write the quotient
beneath, period. Paragraph. 2. If
there is a remainder after any division,
oomma, regard it as prefixed to the next
figure, comma, and divide as l>efore,
period. If any partial dividend is less
than the divisor, prefix it to the next
figure, comma, and write a cipher in the
quotient, period. Paragraph proof pe
riod dash multiply the quotient by the
divisor, comma, and add the remainder,
comma, if any, oomma, to the product,
period”
After reading these painfully idiotio
paragraphs the amazed parent made in
quiry and found that the pupils—chil
dren under 10—were required to study
rules in this way in order tliat they
might be able to write them out and
“ point ” tlu-m, not correctly, but ao
cording to the book.
“I also found,” he adds, “that if a
comma was left out, though tho sense
remained unchanged, the pupil suffered
as much in loss of marks os though she 1
had committed a vital blunder. Thanks
to homo instruction, my little girl un
derstands the rules of arithmetic, but
she cannot learn them by rote in this
parrot fushioi* and suffers accordingly.
Can we have nothing done in this mat
ter to relieve our children from utterly
useless memorizing, that leaves them at
the end of a few yoars with weakened
minds and no taste for study 1 I got a
letter the other day from a mnu who
had graduated from a university. Ho
could neither write nor spell correctly
(spelling goes ‘ goso’), and yet at school
a few years ago, he could glibly recite
all the rules of grammar, aud was by no
means an indifferent pupil"
UOW SIILTOX CAJIE TO WUITB
" VAUADISK EEC AIMED,
It was at tlie time of the great plague
that the poet of “ Par.-disc Lost” took
up his abode at Chalfout, and it was
through the instrumentality of a com
mon friend of his and William Penn’s
that tliiq retreat was selected. Thomas
Ellwood, the Quaker, had made Milton's
acquaintance in London some years be
fore, when hnnted out of house and
home by the Bucks Justices, and - read
Latin to him iu his lodgings in Jewin
street When the plague grew tierce in
the city the blind poet Bethought him
of his one-time secretary, and asked him
to find him some retreat iu his neigh
borhood. Ellwood took this “pretty'
box ” for him ; and it was here that he
suggested to him the idea of “ Paradise
Regained." Milton had handed him
\he manuscript of “ Paradise Lost,” to
pass his judgment ou. “ I pleasantly
said to him,” Ellwood relates in his
“ Life,” “ 1 Thou hast said much here of
paradise lost, hut what hast thou to say
of paradise found ? ’ He made me uo
answer, but sat some time in muse;
■ then broke off that discourse and fell
upon another subject. After the sick
ness was over, aud the city well cleansed,
lie returned thither; and when after
ward I went to wait on him there'he
showed mo his second poem* called
‘Paradise Regained,’ and in a pleasant
tone said to me, f This is owing to you,
for you put it into my head by the
question you put to mo at Ohalfont,
which before I had ihi thought of.’"—
Atfrcd T. l)er't Magazine,
Taut Graphic isn’t sure that the fal
lows who leave theater* between nets go
out for whisky. Borne of theui probably
.take gin.
---%a_
Tsm are 1,*00 lodges of Odd-PeL
torn in Ohio, aad lots of odd fallows oat
fUff Ilia
|food by beiog fM’.
RPIQBAMH FROM « KNDYMtOM."
The following scraps of epigram am
culled from Lord Beaconsfteld’s novel,
" Endymion”:
“ A little knowledge of the world is »
very dangerous thing, especially in liter
ature.” jr
" The only use of being in opposition
is that we may enjoy ourselves.”
“ When a nation is thoroughly per
plexed and dispirited they soon cease to
make distinctions between political par
ties. The country is out of sorts, and
the Government is held answerable for
the disorder.”
“ Sensible men are all of the same re
ligion. And what is that? Sensible
men never tell.”
“ Great men should think of opportu
nity and not pf time. Time is the ex
cuse of feeble and puezled spirits.”
“Every political party changes its
principles on an average once in ten
years.” f
“ Dynasties are unpopular, especially
new ones. The present age is monarch
cSSI, but not dynastic, ” '
“ That hecatomb they call a wedding
breakfast, which celebrates the tri
umph of a rival.”
“Everything in this world depends
upon will.” “ I think everything in t.hi«
world depends upon woman.” “ It is the
same thing.”
“ One should never think of death—
think of life—that is real piety.”
“Turtle makes all men equal.”
“ A public man is responsible, and a
responsible man is a slave. It is private
life that governs the world. The world
talks much of powerful sovereigns and
great ministers, and if being talked about
made one powerful they would be irre
sistible. But the fact is, the more you
are talked about, the less powerful you
are.”
SPEAlilNQ WELL OF OTHERS.
If the disposition to speak well oi
others were universally prevalent, the
world would become a comparative para
dise. The opposite disposition is the Pan
dora box which, when o, sued, fills ever*
house and every neighborhood with pain
and sorrow. How many enmities and
heart burnings flow from this source !
How much happiness is interrupted and
destroyed 1 Envy, jealousy, and the ma
lignant spirit of evil, when they find
vent by the lips, go forth on their mis
sion like foul fiends to blast the repu
tation and peace of others. Every one
has his imperfections ; and in the con
duct of the best there will be occasional
faults which might seem to justify anim
adversion. It is a good rule, however,
when there is occasion for fault find
ing, to do it privately to the erring one.
This may prove salutary. It is a prooi
of interest in the individual, which will
generally be taken kindly, if the man
ner of doing it is not offensive. The
common and unchristian rule, on the
contrary, is to proclaim tho foiling of
others to all but themsevea. ' This is nu
Christian, and shows a despicable heath
now easy it in to bib.
“ If I had strength to hold a pen, j
would write how easy and delightful it
is to die," were the last words of the
celebrated surgeon, Wm. Hunter; and
Louis XIV. is recorded as saying, with
his l^st breath, “ I thought dying had
been more difficult. ”
That the painlessness of death is
owing to some benumbing influence act
ing on the .sensory nerves may be in
ferred from the fact that untoward ex
ternal surroundings rarely trouble the
dying.
On the day that Lord Collingwood
breathed his last the Mediterranean was
tumultuous; those elements which had
been the scene of his past glories rose '
and fell in swelling undulations and {
seemed os if rocking him to sleep. Capt.
Thomas ventured to ask if he was dis
turbed by the tossing of the ship. “No,
Thomas,” he answered, " 1 am now in a
state that nothing can disturb me more—
I am dying, and I am sure it must be
consolatory to you and all that love me
to see how comfortably I am coming to
my end.” In the Qnarterly Jteview
there is related an instance of a criminal
who escaped death from hanging by the
breaking of the rope. Henry IV. of
France sent his physician to examine
him, who reported that after a moment’s
suffering the man saw an appearance like
fire, across which appeared a most beau
tiful avenue of trees. When a pardon
was mentioned the prisoner coolly re
plied that it was not worth asking for.
Those who have been near death from
drowning, and afterward restored to con
sciousness, assert that that the dying
suffer but little pain.
Capt. Marryatt states that his sensa
tions at one time when nearly drowned
were rather pleasant than otherwise.
“ The first struggle for life once ove^
the water closing around me assumed
the appearance of waving green fields.
* * * * It is not a feeling of pain,
but seems like sinking down, overpow
ered by sleep, in the long, soft grass of
the cool meadow.”
Now, this is precisely the condition
presented in death from disease. In
sensibility comes on, the mind loses
consciousness of external objects, and
death rapidly and placidly ensues from
asphyxia.
FILIAL AFFECTION.
School-Board Examiner (improving
the occasion)—“ Children, love and
honor your parents. Never give them
pain. There are two kinds of pain—
■mental and physical. Now, Sally Mig
gins, if, on rising in the morning, you
found your father ill and suffering great
pain, yon would be sorry, would you
not ?” ,
Sally Miggins—" I ain’t sorry when
father ’aves the gout, sir; I'm glad.”
S. B.E.—“Glad! Why?”
1 a M.—“'Coe then he can't wear his
boots; so I don’t 'sve to dean 'em.’’
“Cteotun’s DAnnnio.’’—We have re
ceived your poem entitled, “When the
bluebirds sweetly sing,” and will save it
until the bluebirds apt here. We are
always obliged to oaavy sever a lot of
bluebird and robin and daisy poetry, but
it oomes handy in the spring when the
windows need eleening.—CAtoavo Trib
a Nick QVkaisox.
A question has arisen in regard to the
fight or propriety of an
Sgricultuml college, consequently
an employe of thr acquiring a
personal property discovery or
invention he may to make in
soph employment. aro M f0j.
lows:
Two of the profi the TiUnni.
Industrial University employed in
making experiments in producing sugar
from sorghum. TheAt experiments were
bo successful that tye professors have
patented the procesi as used in their own
names and as their oi|n property. As
the question of th propriety of this
course has arisen, t io Principal of the
university, under hi own signature, has
publicly defended ::. Bat in the de
fense he makes use - C the following ex
traordinary words hi regard to the dis
sovery becoming public property :
“ 1 Becoming publii property’ sounds
well; is a flue sentiitynf; but as a sen
1 tiaient it would bo 'pit' »SF uiec to say
the ‘dear public’ mould own, as a pnb
lie, all the property in the State.’1
Principal Scott uses an illustration
which completely takes the ground from
under his own foot; for the doar public
do really and iu fuct own all the prop
erty in the State, She apparent owners
being simply occupiers, subject to the
eminent domain and rights of the State.
The State can, by due process of law,
take possession of »ny person’s farm or
house and put it to public uses, and in
every grant of land to an individual this
precedent right is reserved. Moreover,
the State can take a person’s projicrty
and his person and use them for its own
servioe when it .is thought necessary by
the State Government. The question is
a narrow ono. Must the farmers of Ill
inois and of other States bo compelled i
to pay a tax to persons who, in the :
course of their employment in a public j
capacity and while Under public pay,
discover any methods for processes |
which they are employed to discover ? i
These gentlemen were certainly em- :
ployed to experiment in making sugar, j
The coat of mukiug the experiment was j
paid out of the university funds, which i
are public moneys. To whom, then, do
the results of thesi experiments be), mg?
Is the public to be satisfied with a long
table of figures showing tho results,
while tho methods of producing these
results are kept Becrct and are reserved
as the private property of tho experi
menters, for which those persons for I
whom the experiments were mado—the !
farmers—must pay if they desire to use \
them ?—Country Gentleman.
HOW TUH “JHlidM1 K 1C KPS WARM.
Over in the Big meadows, any day, a !
fine illustration of uhitly eomfort may
be seen in the plan adopted by the In
diana to catch ttsli and keep warm ut the
same time. Follow the river, and occa
sionally you come ucross a noble red
man, muffled up in all the old coats and
blankets he possesses, sitting iu - his ca
noe, which is loaded with tiro wood.
Three or four feet of the center of the
canoe is covered with Band to the depth
of two or three inches, mid on this he
keeps a bright fire blazing, and, with
his back to the flame, pursues his duties
of taking in tho speckled boauties. The
smoke might prove troublesome to a
white man, but the Digger is in uo dan
ger of having his complexion injured,
and, as he paddles along from one good
riffle to another, he looks as independ
ent as a lord, and throws a glance of
pity at the poor devil of a white man,
who takes his chancos from the snowy
bank, and has to knock under in the Ash
ing race at the rate of about five to one.
—Plumas (Cat) National.
A PnNNSYL.VA.MA jury, iu a murder
ttial, that could not agree on a verdict,
enguged iu prayer, after which they
found the person guilty of murder iu the
lirst degreo.
The alluring game of draw poker has
lately become dowoi-ticate 1 in Japan,
where, it is said, the stakes fioipioiftly
run too high, as a rule, for men of mod
erate ambition.
CLERICAL ORATORY.
Why do not our preachers study ora
tory ? As preachers, not pastors, their
business is to work a certain effect, and
all helps to its production it should be a
part of education to learn. I presume I
shall not be misunderstood to mean the
effect of displaying self, and winning ad
miration for personal gifts. What the
true preacher seeks to do is to inform
the intellect with Christian truth; to
stir the th-art, and thereby influence the '
will of his hearers. Half the sermons
annually preached are. so far as human
insight goes, a waste of labor and breath.
Two things parily account for this: one
is that a nia.ority of the men set to preach
are out of t heir real vocation—good pas
tors they m y he, hut fit preachers they
are not; another is that those with apti
tude for preaching do not yet understand
the menus to be employed to attain their
object.
Sometimesthe preacherhas conception
of the needs of human natjuv,and knows
that the truest truths fail to move when
put before men iu a dull, dry way ; per
haps h« does h .a best to acquire a good
stylvuud succeeds in making an ably
writteu discourse, but « non be comes
into hia pul pit to give it to his people,
where is the impression it should pro
duce? Wliat becomes of his choice
words, his considered sentences? There
they lie upon the page he holds; he pro
ceeds to read them. Why do they fail
of any result ? It is for want of delivery,
of the oratorical art of making mere words
"telL” His faithful effort goes fqr little;
he seems to bis hearers to be reading
to them, as he is—not to be
■peeking to them from the heart—At
kmtto.
AX JXTULKKABLK UVUE.
The would-be funny" man is s nuis
ance. He is constantly saying things
which he expects you to laugh at, bnt
which you can’t laugh at until he ex
plains the point or make* a new one.
And still he undauntedly perseveres in
liis course, evidently flunking himself a
great wit : .
AZ.EITXKATIO.VM 4MTXUJ. AID.
A friend write* mm the Colorado
mountains to say that to has got as rnv
LOOKING roB CONGKKSS.
" Where's Congress ? I'm looking tot
Congress,” said a tall, one-eyed woman,
peering through one of the doors qf the
House of Representatives.
“Is that feller with the bald head
Congress ? "
“ What do you want with Congress,
any how ? ” demanded a deputy door
keeper, gruffly. «• Hold on 1 you can’t
go ip there.”
‘I come from Bucks county, Penn
sylvania, to see Congress, aud if you’ve
got it on draught anywhere around here
I want some. What’s the reason I can’t
go in there ? ”
“’Cause you can’t. Nobody allowed
u6i6 but members.”
“That red-headed man with a squint
a member?” ^
“ No; he’s one of the members’ secre
taries. He has a perfect right on the
floor.”
“Is that lop-sided chap with a wig
one of the members?” ,,
No; he’s a friend of a member; had
a pass.”
“What’s that bore-legged boy falling
over a chair ? Has ho got any friends?”
“ He’s one of the pages. ”
“ \yiio is that red-nosed artist with a
sore ear ? Did he have a pass ? ”
“That’s a messenger. He doesn’t
need a pass.”
“What’s that fellow with his legs on
a desk. Is he one of the bosses ? ”
“ He is one of the clerks.”
“Do any of them fellows pay any
taxes ? ”
“I think not; don’t know,” said the
doorkeeper, indifferently.
“Now, young fellow, you want to
hunt for room to stand in while I bust
in this door. Don’t fool with me, or
your friends will think you’ve been do
ing business with a steam grindstone. T
pay taxes on throe acres and eight pigs
in Bucks county, and I’m going through
this ’ore CoDgress like a contribution
box through a congregation. You just
crawl out of sight if you don’t want your
spine to change places with the noxt
township.”
“ Send for your member, and he will
pass you in.”
“ Where’s the Congress from Buoks
oounty? Show me the Bucks county
Congress! and if he don't get a bill
through this town to send that hare
lipped old sky-iocket who wants to fore
close a mortgage on my place to the pen
itentiary he’ll wish he’d been bom a
tree and cut down and burned when ho
was young. Point out the Congress
from Buoks oounty* before I have you
inside out, to see how you’re put togeth
er. Tell me I can’t go in among a lot of
clerks, passes and pages! If there’s a
square foot of Congress left by the time
I reach it, it’ll wish it was covered with
hair that comes out without hurting! ”
They induced her to leave by telling
her that the “ Congress from Bucks !
oounty ” held its sessions in the Patent >
Office, and she departed, threatening to |
get the bill disposing of ber mortgage
through before she left town, or make
the Bucks oounty member think a bar
ml of “ cider had basted under him just
«■ a on top oi him.”
-_
TUB NKXNVU MAI) A MB'S NEW
IIO A KJ)EJt.
“ Madame, what is there ou the card
for the dinner! ” inquired the new bourder
at our boarding-house, us he seated him.
to table.
“Of the soup, of the beef, of the
sheep, of the calf and of the poultry,” J
replied she ; “the which wisli you?”
“A piece oi the hen roasted,” said ho ;
“and of the apples of the ground.”
“Wish you of the apples of the ground
cooked to the water or to the furnace ? ”
demanded sho.
“I prefer them cooked to tlie master
of hotel,” said he.
“ Wo have not of cook French,” said
madame, sharply, “when the to board
is of such good market it must that we
sweat blood and water to make come to
gether both ends,” and madame wiped
one tear from her eye.
“Oh, bring me what, you have,” said
the new boarder, tend ired to the instant,
“but dispatch yourself, as I wish ac
company of thft friends to celebrate the
funerals of a mister at two hours. Bring
me in, same time, mat tame, if you please,
of the pie to the eggs, and a cup of cof
fee, black for the dessert.”
And madame in person, who hears
her trade, brought his diiuier, with a
smile to ravish, and tho boarder, suscep
tible, forgot the toughness of the hen
wing in the tenderness of his gracious
landlady.
AN IMPORTANT MA JTK1L
Printers, and, to some extent, the
public generally, will be interested in
the following article, which appeared in
a late number of MackelUur's Typo
graphic Advertiser: “Instant atten
tion is called to a petition prepared by
some publishing house in New York,
and addressed to the Secretary of State,
praying for the negotiation of a treaty
with Great Britain to eonfer interna
tional-copyright privileges on British
and American authors. The method
proposed to accomplish the object, by
treaty instead of open legislative actiqn,
is not likely to meet the'approval of the
American people. The subject should
be fully discussed in Congress, with a
searching scrutiny into its details and
bearing. Untold millions have been ex
pended in educating oar people and
making them a nation of readers* This
market to British authors is conse
quently worth immeasurably more
than the British market is to Ameri
can authors, and the conditions are
therefore immensely unequal. Some
compensating advantage would seem to
be dne to our citizens ; but, so far from
this, the treaty proposed has a cunning
proviso that eon only work injuriously to
our artisans and operatives—the third
clause saying that foreign books, to be
entitled to copyright, shall be manufact
ured in this country; and then nearly
entirely nullifying the effect of the clause
by these words: “ And the word manu
factured shall not be held to prohibit
printing in one country from stereotype
plates prepared hi the other and import
ed for this purpose.’ Are American
compositors, engravers, stereotypers,
type-founder* prepared to sanction
a measure so injurious to them? Let
mb mam with Tub ibom mask.
The identity of “ Tho Iron Mask,” or
** The Man with die Iron Mask,” has
never been satisfactorily established. ^
About the year 1679 ho was carried with
the utmost secrecy to the Castle of Pig
nerol, and wore during the journey a
black mask, which was not of iron, but
of black velvet, strengthened with
whalebone, and aoenred loiliind with
steel springs, or by means of a lock, as
some say. Tlic ordors were that if he
revealed himself he was to lie killed. He
was conveyed in 1686 to th£ isle of Sointe
Marguerite, and during tho passage the
strictest watch was kept that he might
not allow himself to be discovered. The
unknown prisoner was in 1698 conveyed
to the Bastilo, and was, as before, hid
den behind the mask. In that prison the I
captive remained until his death, in 1730.
On Nov. 20, tho day after his death,
he was buried in the cemetery of St.
Paul, under the naino of Machioti. The
unknown was treated with the great**
respect, but so closely was ho watched
that he was not permitted to take off his
mask even in the presence of the physi
cian who attended him. Many conject
ures have been hazarded as to who “The
Man with the Iron Mask” could have
been, the one generally accepted at the
present day by those who have carefully
investigated the subject being tho fol
lowing: It is conjectured that he was a
Count Matthioli, a Minister of Charles
IIL, Duke of Mantua. -This Minister
had been largely bribed by Louis XIV.,
and had pledged himself to urge the
Duke to give up to the French the for
tress of Casale, which gave access to tho
whole of Lombardy. Louis found that
Matthioli was playiilg him false, and
lured him to tho French frontier, and
then had him secretly arrested and im
prisoned. As ho was Minister Plenipo
tentiary at the time, his seizure was a
flagrant violation of international low,
which it was safer to be able to deny
than to justify, and, whe:i the denial
was made once, the “honor” of France
was involved in upholding it.
GAltFIELD'S llKLIQlDUS VIEWS.
By the natural bent of his miud, the
lato President had a likiug for philo
sophic and religious studies, which was
strengthened and gratified during liis
two terms at Williams College, where a
good deal of attention is given to meta
physics, and liis subsequent four yoars
of teaching at Hiram ; but iu his later
career the practical questions of life ab
sorbed him so much that he found little
time to devote to the domain of specula
tion and theoretical thought. He road
Mill, Comte aud Spencer, however, and
was deeply interested in such books os
James Freeman Clarke's “Ten Great Re
ligious," aud in the current discussions
| in the English reviews aud magazines
on new phases of religious belief and
criticism. There was nothing of the
bigot about him. He welcomed all hon
est discussion; and was always willing to
throw off old opinons if convinced they
were erroneous. Iu his religious views
he might have been called a rationalis
tic Christian. I doubt if lie could have
passed a successful catechising on the
doctrinal points of any orthodox creed,
but on bitch essential mutters as a be*
lief in the divine guidance of the universe
and the immortality of tho human soul,
his faith was unshaken. Modem mate
rail ism made no impression upon him.
The argument that the miud is only a
phenomenon of matter ho thought a
stupid reversal of tho truth. The soul
or life-principit: was tho real thing, he
maintained, and the phases of matter
only its transient and varying expression.
The church to which he belonged irorn
boyhood has no written creed and does
not question its members ns to their
theological conceptions; therefore he
was not hampered by formul statements
of faith iu his intellectual growth, and
was able without hypocrisy to retain as
jociations which became very dear to
him in early life.—E. H Smalley.
An Arkansas man paid $200 for a mud
stone, let a cur bite him as an expoti
meut. and died in six weeks for a fact.
SMITH WAS OUT.
A Detroit lawyer was sitting in his
office when a stranger appeared at the
door and said:
“ Beg pardon, bat can you tell me
where Smith’s office is ?”
" Yes, sir—next door.”
The stranger uttered his thanks and
passed to the uext door, which was
locked. Returning to the lawyer he
observed:
“ Smith seems to be ont ?”
" Of course be is. If yon had asked
that question in the first place I should
have answered it by telling you so.”
The visitor had a troubled look on his
face as he passed out of the building,
bat that look was gone when he re
turned next day and inquired of tho
lawyer:
“ How mnch will you charge me for a
verbal opinion in a little matter ?”
"Oh, about$5.”
The case was stated and the opinion
given, and the stranger was moving
away when the lawyer said ;
"My fee, please.”
" I haven’t a cent to pay yon I”
“ You haven’t ?”
" Of course not If yon had asked me
that question in the first plaoe I should
have answered by telling you bo. Good
morning, sir 1”
k Danbeby man tells a good story of
his sunt, who is a model housekeeper
and a, scrupulous stickler for a good
table. The clergyman culled near tbs
dinner hour, and was pressed to stayfor
the meal. At the table there was a
good supply of well-prspured food, but
tho lady felt compelled to make many
apologies lor imaginary deficiencies. In
the grace the slergymau asked ont
Heavenly Father to “ blesa tlie frugal
tueal.’’ This vi "1 - V»dv v<»rv nn‘J.
Hbbb is another straw. A man who
trent through an excursion train of 900
passengers taking' a Presidential vote
didn’t find a single Hancock man. P.
8.—-He didn’t And a Garfield man
either, for the first person he accosted
knocked him down, and a dozen flbtliers
wiped np the floor with him and wedged
him ao fast under a seat that all the
passengers escaped before be onuld re
lease ids—He t»» declared himself
in favor of the anti-Masanio candidate,
his treatment in the car havisjr made
aa didn't auaar.
The following extract from an article
«ji the Boston Commonwealth gives a
good illustration of the tremendous
(lower of printer’s ink:
Speaking of newspapers leads me to
■ay that the extended advertisement aa
we know it originated with George W.
Simmons, after he'started his “Oak
Hall,” and it is now fully forty years
since it appeared. That enterprising
and “original” merchant wrote a
lengthy story of his establishment’s
wares and sent it to the Post, with di
rections that it should make a column
in length. The announcement was a
revelation in the counting-room.
No such enormous advertisement
Was ever heard of in that -office. Mr.
|peals wiped his spectacles and looked
at the order a second time. He sent
Mr. Slack, the qnarter-of-a-centnry col
lector of that offioe, down to Ann street
to see if a mistake had not been made.
T* No,” said Mr. Simreonn, “ that iawhafei
Vwant—a column of space. Put it in
just as marked, and come down for
refer money.” It was accordingly done
*a directed, and there was a sensation.
When Mr. Beals handled the first check
iu payment he was about as much as
tonished at the ease with which it was
drawn as he was when the advertise
ment came in. Everybody talked of
the rashness of the proprietor of “ Oak
Hall.” The street was full of clothing
stores, from Union street to Center
street. The crowd began to assemble
at “ Oak Hall,”and often, by 10 o’clock,
thb store would be so full that Mr. Sim
mons had to lock the outside door from
inability to let in any more. Then the
crowd loitered on the sidewalk, and
made even more commotion for that usu
ally quiet neighborhood. Simmons’
neighbors in the trade held, at one of
their stores, a meeting, over which Nat
Gale, now of Chelsea, presided, to see
what they would do about this extraordi
nary state of things. They concluded
that they couldn’t do anything if Sim
mons kept on in the way he began, ex
cept to wait and see him “burst np«
before long. The longer Mr. Simmons
kept doing it, the longer was postponed
his explosion. The fact was, he mode
an immense trade and reaped a profit
correspondingly.
" • TOILET RECIPES. ‘
To Remove Pimples.—Two ounces of
bi-carbonate of soda, one drachm of
glycerine, one ounce of spermaceti oint
ment.
Face Wash.—Two grains of bi-chlo
ride of mercury, two grains of muriate of
ammonia, eight ounces of emulsion of
almonds.
Cake op the Nails.—Brush them
carefully at least once a day, according
to one’s work, pushing- back the flesh
from the nail, thus avoiding hang-nails.
Under no circumstances bite them, but
trim with either scissors qr< penknife.
Do not cut the nails shorter than the
Angers, or both will soon have a stubby
appearance; and dean them with a
blunt,^ot sharp, point.
. Purifying the Breath.—Foul breath
is usually caused by an unhealthy state
of the stomach or poor teeth. If caused
by the first, the physician should be
called upon ; if the latter, apply to the
dentist. If from neither^ take chlorate
of lime, seven drachms ; gum arabic,
live drachms; to be mixed with warm
wate/to a stiff paste, rolled and cut into
lozenges. These will arrest decay in
the teeth and neutralize acidity of the
stomaeli, and will also remove all trace
of tobacco from the breath.
Care of the Tecch.—They should be
brushed earof illy after each meal, and
particularly alter supper just before go
ing to bod, as whsrt particles as may be
left on the teeth after eating very soon
destroy th an. Brushing the teeth once
a day with pure White castile soap will
keep th sm clean and white. If yon can
not remove the tartar that may accumu
late by the use of a brush, take pow
dered pumice stone, and, with a small
stick made into a fine brush at.the end,
rub the teet.i carefully with the pumice
atone. Once a month will do for this,
because, if practiced too often, it is apt
to destroy the enamel.
Restoring the Color of the Hair.—
When the hair loses color, it may be re
stored by bathing the head in a weak
solution of ammonia—an even teaspoon
ful of car'eonatc of ammonia to a quart
of water—wasliirgthe head With a crush
mitten and hr us.dug the hair thoroughly
while wet. Bat? ing the head in a strong
solution of ro;k salt is said to restore
j.ray hair in some cases. Pour boiling
water on rocs salt in the proportion of
1 wo heaping 1 ablo-spoonfuls to a quart
of water und let it stand boforo using.
Ammonia, if used too often, makes the
luii" lighter, and, if in a strong solution,
hums and splits the h- ir.
BOMB FAMILIAR SAYINGS.
Sliokspeare gives us more pitliy say*
ings than any other author. From him
we cull: “ Count their chickens ere they
are hatched,” “Make doubly sure,”
“ Look before you leap,” “ Christman
comes 'but once a year.” Washington
Irving gives us the “Almighty dollar.”
Thomas Norton queried long ago, “What
will Mrs. Grundy say?” while Gold
smith answers, “Ask me no questions and
I’ll tell you no flbs.” Thomas Tusser, a
writer of .the sixteenth century, gives us
“It’s an ill wind that turns wo good,”
“Better late than, never,” “Look ere
yon leap," and “The stone that is roll
ing will gather no moss.” “All ary and
no wool ” is found in Butler’s .“ Hudi
bras.” Dryden says: “None (but the
brave deserve the fair,” “ Mem are but
children of the larger growth,” “’.through
thick and thin.” “ Of two evils: I have
chosen the least,” and “ The end must
justify the means,” are from 1 Catfchew,
Prior. We are indebted to Cobby Cib
ber for the agreeable intelligei»e that
“Biehnrd is himself again.” Corper
tells us that “Variety is the spice of
life.” To Milton we owe “ The’-ipacadise
of Fools.” Fibm Bacon comes “•Know
ledge is power,” and Thomas Southerns
reminds us that “ Pity’s akin to love.”
Dean Swiit thought that “ Broad is the
■tad of life.” Campbell found that “Com
ing events oast their shadows Tsefore,”
and “’Tis distance lenda enchantment
k to the view.” “A thing of beauty is a
joy forever” is from Keats. IVauklin
says “God helps those who help them
selves,” and Lawrence Sterne comforts
mrirt^tbsteougrt thst“Godtempers
* fttJ Hmra tonvnta tp.
There Is abundant evidence that the
amount of water on the surface of the
earth has been steadily diminishing lor
many thousands of years. No one
donbts that there was a. time when the
Caspian sea communicated with the
Black sea, and when the Mediterranean
covered the greater part of the Desertof
Sahara. In fact, geologists tell us that
at one period tho wholo of the earth was
covered by water, and the fact that con
tinents of dry land now exist is proof
that there is less water on our globe now
than there was in its infancy. This dim
inution of our supply of water is going
on at the present day at a /ate so rapid
as to be clearly appreciable. The rivers
and smaller streams of onr Atlantic
States are visibly smaller than they were
twenty-live years ago. Country brooks
in which men now living were accus
tomed to fish and bathe in their lx>y
hood have in many cases totally disap
peared, not through any act of man, but
solely in consequence of tho failure of
the springs and brooks which oneo fed
them. The level of the great lakes is
falling year by year. There are many
piers on the shores of lakeside cities
which vessels one approached with ease,
but which now baldly reach to tho edge
of the water. Harbors aro everywhere
growing shallower. Tliis is not due to
tho gradual deposit of earth brought
_dowu by rivers or of refuaq city
sewers. The iiarbor of Toronto has
grown shallow in spite of the fact that it
has been dredged out so that tLq bottom
rock lias been reached, and all the dredg
ing that can be done to tho harbor of
1 New York will not permanently deepen
it. The growing shallowness of tho
Hudson is more evident above Albany
uiMi n is m me nae-waier region, ana,
liV the outlet of Lake Champlain, whi h
was once navigable by Indian canoes at all
seasons, the Upjjer Hudson is now almost
bare of water in many places during the
summer. In all other parts of the world
there is the samo steady decrease of wa
ter in rivers and lakes, and the rainfall
in Europe, where scientific observations
are made, is manifestly less than it was
at a period within man’s memory.
What is becoming of the water ? Ob
viously it is not disappearing through
evaporation, for in that case raids would
give back whatever wator the atmos
phere might absorb. We must ac
cept the theory that, like the water of
the moon, our water is sinking into the
earth’s interior.—New York Times.
MAKING MONET.
Some people can hardly make a liv
ing, and some layjjup money. Why ia
it ? Into a village of a few hundred in
habitants a young man came and was
employed as clerk in the store; he lived
there fifty years and laid up $100,000.
Other men worked as hard, but did not
lay up money.
Near that village was a large and
beautiful farm. The owner of it had it
from his father. He did not drink nor
gamble, and yet he could not make a
living, and so borrowed money, and to
secure it gave a mortgage on the farm.
In a few years the farm was sold and ho
was obliged to move away. A Scotch
man, with but little money, and with a
large family, passed by and saw the
house was vacant and struck a bargain
with the owner. He began to work, to
save and to pay, and in ten or twelve
years he was the entire owner. Then
he went on and laid up money, and is
now a rich man.
The art of making money is one that
should be carefully studied. If you
take a dollar and lend it out at G per
cent, interest, it will double itself iu
sixteen years. If you take a dollar and
buy something with it, and then sell .
that at a profit, and so keep doing, you
increase your capital. These three ways
are the foundation ways of money-mak
ing. All business is in one of these
three forms. Those who succeed the
Lest are those who know the most about
what they do.—School Journal.
It is said that the cost of living for
collegemen at Harvard who make their
appearance in the best society is not less
than $1,500 a year, and at Yule i! is
ei ,200. This is not for extravagant in
dividuals cither, but for thoso who ura
quite moderate in their desires.
WOM.IXLV MODESTY.
Man loves the mysterious. A cloud
less sky sind the full-blown rose leave
him unmoved; but the violet which
lddes its blushing beauties behind tho
bush, and the moon when emerging from
behind a cloud, are to him sources of in
spiration and of pleasure. Modesty is
to merit what shade is to a figure in
painting—it gives boldness and promi
nence. Nothing adds more to female
beauty than modesty. •' It sheds around
the countenance a halo of light that is
borrowed from virtue. Botanists have
given the rosy huo which tinges the cup
of the white rose the name of “ maiden
blush.” This pure and delicate hue is
the only paint Christian ■ virtue should
use. It is the richest ornament. A
woman without modesty is like a faded
flower diffusing an unwholesome odor,
which the prudent gardener will throw
from him. Her destiny is melancholy,
for it terminates in shame and repent
ance. Beauty passes like the flowers,
which bloom and die in a few
hours; but modesty gives tho female
charms which supply the place of tran
sitory freshness of youth.
A lkadino oculist of Boston is report
ed as saying that he has more patients
from the Law School at Cambridge than
from any other source. ] t must not be
supposed from this that the young men
injure their eyes by exoessive applica
tion. The bad ventilation and gas
heated air of the lecture rooms cause
A JtVDK FOLK.
The Sicilians are a rude folk, if judged
by their' proverbs, some of which are
printed in the Paris Debate, as follows;
“ He who hasn’t a wife knows not the
devil. *’
“ A woman who goes to every fete, and
a mule that drinks at every fountain, is
no good.”
“Howho gets married is contented
for a day; he who kills a pig has enough
for a year.”
, * ‘ tlrod keep thee from a man who looks
on the ground, and a woman who looks
at the sky.”
“ There is only one devil, and he has
100 wives.”
“ Women have a devil for every hair.'
“Even kill a man?” they asked of the
tenderfoot when he arrived at Dead*
'wood. “Reckon I have, several,” fa*
replied. More respectful in manner they
uskedi “Shoot him?” “No.” “Knife
him?” “No.” “Chib him to death?”
.“No.” “Poison?” “No, air I" “Then
how did you ever kill a man?" “Drove
°”.r
ft.. V X 'ii* ■‘-.y