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The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, January 07, 1909, Image 4

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ATR RICHMOND PALLADIUM AND SUN-TELEGRAM, THURSDAY, JANUARY 7, 1909.
PAG1S FOUR.
o Richmond Palladium
' ,-t. and Snn-Telegram
hihRshed and owned by the PALLA
DIUM PRINTING CO. Issued 7
days each week, evenings
and Sunday morning;.
Mftoe Corner North th and A streets.
tlosne Phone 1121.
RICHMOND, INDIANA.
fcaah G. le
-Maaasla Editor.
-Bualaeaa Maaacer.
Sews Bdltor.
Isrlw Bf. Mr-
9. Own Kuki
SUBSCRIPTION TERMS.
In Richmond $$.00 per year (In ad
vanca) or 10c per week.
t A1A.IL bUBBllUriluno.
rw.. I. mA.ar.n- S5.00
Blx months. In advance 2 ?
Ona month. In advance
RURAL ROUTES.
iOna year. In advance ??Y
tx months. In advance
ao month. In advance
I AAAr-m ohtnrtd a often as desired:
both new and old addresses must be
alven.
t Subscribers will pleaae remit with I
order, which should be given for a
Specified term: name will not be enter
ed until payment is receiver. .
Entered at Richmond, Indiana, post
ffice as second class mail matter.
Heart to Heart
Talks.
By EDWIN A. NYE.
Copy.ig,M, 1908, by Edwin A. Nye
THE DEATH Of YER.KES.
X want to read yo:i a little sermon on
the career and death of the late trae
tion magnate,. Charles T. Yerkes.
Be died at a fashionable hotel In
Mew York, and while his body was
till warm it was bustled Into a big
wicker basket and to a freight elevator
to get It out of the way
His wife refused to see him on his
deathbed
His son and daughter were
stranged from him. No one but the
anirse was with him when be died.
Ha was worth in money many mil-
liana.
.When Yerkes died the cafes and ro
tundas of the Waldorf-Astoria were
crowded with gay parties. The guests
mutt not be shocked. What to do?
The porters hastily filled a big laundry
basket with soiled linen. Yerkes' body
was dumped In add stealthily dragged
to the elevator. It was thus trans
ferred to a back sample room to await
the undertaker's wagon.
So
The funeral bier of this multimilllon-
v'aire, art critic and connoisseur was a I
laundry basket, be had for a shroud
soiled linen, and his temporary sepul
cber was a damping room for refuse,
Afterward, of course, the body lay In
ttate in the Fifth avenue palace whence
he had tried to drive his wife. Nobody
but the reporters and curiosity , seekers
came. Neither wife nor child nor rela
tlve was in the funeral : procession,
' consisting of four cabs.
Yerkes divorced the wife who had
atood by him in the day of his trial
He married his stenographer, lured by
"hie desire for sensual beauty. Fas
ctoated by a tr.trd woman, be was suing
the second wife for a divorce at the
time of his death.
He was a man of dominant power.
crafty intellect, a cold heart and an
esthetic taste.
Now
The old book says, "Whatever a man
aowetti that also shall he reap," and it
he '"sows to the flesh he shall of the
flesh reap corruption."
Yerkes sowed to the flesh.
He got what he bargained for.
It is idle to ask if such a man found
happiness. Yerkes sold himself to the
devil for the sake of power, place, pic
tures, passion. The devil does not pay
la terms of human happiness. In the
realm of happiness his currency is but
counterfeit.
You cannot walk to happiness, my
brethren, by stepping on broken hearts
and gold dollars.
THAID Of A MILLION DOLLARS.
A Chicago newspaper tells the story
of a family heir to $1,000,000 that best
tates te take the money for fear it
may Interfere with future happiness.
"Quixotic," some people would call It.
This Urge heritage comes to Emil
Afcher, a retailer in gloves, who has
a wife and eight children. The family
Ifves contentedly in a cozy flat The
children are all married excepting the
youngest.
The money comes from an uncle In
Germany.
But falling heirs to a million does
not seem to have given these people
the thrill supposed to come to the very
fortunate in these commercial times.
They are actually afraid of the
money.
In an Interview Mrs. Ascher says: "I
appose we must take the money. But
I can tell yon I. want nothing but my
husband and children. We are very
happy. I am afraid of a future with
ouch money, and so Is my husband.
Continuing, the good woman says
"We are not rich. We have simply
enough to eat and a fairly good place
to live. All the money In the world
could not make us more satisfied. It is
not money that makes people happy.
It Is living a good life."
"What we will do with all this money,'
aid the husband, "I cannot tell. We
will take a trip to Germany, my wife
and I. We will probably give half the
money to hospitals and old people's
homes and then divide the rest be
tween mother and the children."
It ls safe to say that million will not
magnetise other millions In the hands
of Mr. and Mrs. Ascher.
There are those who would mortgage
their hope of salvation for $1,000,000
and permit the mortgage to be fore
closed. These will sneer at the sug
gestion that any one should fear the
effect of much money on future happl-
ness.
"i And yet .
There are great possibilities of evil
as well as of good in the use of a mil
lion. Improperly directed. It might
emsUy disrupt the genuine happiness
of a little fireside. , It might easily
bring family strife and heartburnings
and much misery.
AM on the otLf r hand'
Money can 'slid, bur"it cannot make
happiness.
' This family Is wise above the wis
dom of ita day. InstlnctlTely It feels
what many would be wiser people do
not understand the peril to peace of
sudden riches.
A BRILLIANT SHAM.
Paris Under the Rule of the
Third
Napoleon.
Never was there so pleasure loving
and so easy going a court, and seldom
has there been one which was exter
nally so splendid. The emperor spent
money like water and thereby produc
ed a prosperity for the time and with
it popularity for the government
Hundreds of millions were lavished
upon Paris, much of it being wasted,
yet none the less with the result that
the cty really deserved its title la
Tille lumiere. - In these days it lias
gone to seed and grown shabby, but in
1869 everything seemed fresh and
a i -in:--.. mnnann. The
a rmv was rotten to the core. Yet the
emperor's cent gardes were splendid
" 1 1
soldiers to the eye. Society was no
less demoralized, yet its gayety was
.kllinii4tnrt Thaoa vara the rinvfl
tiuuaiauus. I
when it was said that good Americans
when they die go to Paris. The em-
peror conferred distinction by recog-
nizing any foreigner. The empress set
4 U faahlnnc, tha WArM It WHS 11 11
a sham, but it was thoroughly mag-
niflcent in its way.. It can best be
understood at present by reading Zo-
la's early novels, by recalling somel
.h.nt.ra f naudefs "T Nahah" and
by remembering Jacques Offenbach,
whose opera bouffe was the most char-
acterlstlc production of an empire
which itself was bouffe. That shal-
low and yet catcny music was a ronai
sneer. Every libretto was a mock at
the old time virtues of chastity and
honor ana courage. narry xnursiou
Peck in Bookman.
BELLINI'S BEST OPERA.
Norma" Was Hissed at First Tha
Composer's Death.
Bellini was born in Sicily. He died
at Puteaux, near Paris, under some-
what strange circumstances, in xoao.
earon Ayme a-Aquno wrotetoaxneuu;
"I rode out to cau on mm; Dut, asusu-
ai, ine garaener 01 nis nouse rauseu i
to let me in. Later on in the day there
was a heavy storm, and at about 5
o'clock I once again tried to see him.
As no one answered the bell I pushed
against the gate, and it gave way, so I
got Into the house. I found Bellini on
a bed, abandoned ny an. At nrst 1
thought that he was asleep. When I
touched his hand, it was quite cold, for
he was dead."
A curious letter is published, written
by him when his "Norma" was hissed
at the first representation: "I have just
returned from the Scala. Would you
believe it? 'Norma' was hissed. I no
longer recognized the friendly Milan
ese, who received with enthusiasm and
delight the 'II Pirata,' La Straniera,'
'La Sonnambula.' I have deceived my-
a1 f T havaj maslA a crr&a t- mlatnlra A 11
my progenitors have been wrong. All
my expectations have been Illusions.
But, I assure you from my heart, there
are morsels in it that I shall be proud
if I can ever excel. Did not the Ro
mans hiss 'L'OIympiade' of the divine
Pergolesl? In all theatrical produc
tions the public is the supreme judge.
The public will reverse its judgment
It will recognize that 'Norma is the
best of my operas." Argonaut.
Where Parliament Failed.
According to all accounts, the Cam
eron highlanders militia are a fine
body of men physically. Not long ago
four of them occupied the least crowd
ed seat in a full compartment on a
Scotland railway. Just as the train
was moving off a diminutive little cler-
gyman jumped into the compartment
and tried to edge himself in betvreen
two of the highlanders. Not finding
It very comfortable, he turned to the
one on his right and said: "Sit up,
please. You know that, according to
act or parliament, tne seat noias nve.
-xne nignianaer looked at him-ror a
moment ana tnen repnea: "mat may
oe a- ncnt enougn lor your amu, sir,
but snalrty ye canna' blame me for no
.. CWM"?clW4 """"if 10 01
nnrHfliupnt?" I
Contagion and Infection,
A contagious disease is one in which
the disease producing organism goes
direct from the person having the dis
ease to a person who has not the dis
ease without passing through an inter
mndiarv medium, ns In tnhprmlnsis
fnr Tumnlo . Malaria ah th nthor
hand, is an infectious disease, because
the ortrauiam which produces It Is tak-1
en from a person by a mosquito, re- Congressional ApportionmentSen
produces .itself in the mosquito and is ator Orndorf, of Huntington and Whit-
tranamftrori hr the. mnannit-n whth
may never have been in contact with
the neraon bv whom the original or-1
eanism was riven off. New York
American. 5
Another Way.
A well known Iondon physician wat
Invited out to the country for some
shooting; but, although he tried sev-
eral times, he could not hit a single
rabbit
'I'm very unlucky," he exclaimed,
I ve killed nothing all day."
'Never mind," said his host. "Write
the rabbits one of your prescriptions,
Foul.
"Foul tactics," declared the halfback.
"What's the trouble now 2" demand
ed the referee.
"I tried a kick for the stomach, but
this fellow blocked It with his head."-
Kansas City Journal.
Good Behavior.
Employer Why were you discharged
rM ny were you discharged
from vour last Dlace? Applicant For
good behavior. Employer what do
yon mean by that? Applicant They
took three months off -mr sentence-
Cleveland Leader.
Mrs. Austin's famous pancakes j
make a hearty, wholesome breakfast !
Fresh supply now at your grocer's.
MASONIC CALENDAR.
Thursday Evening, Jan. 7 Wayne
Council. No. 10. R. & S. M. Stated
Assembly.
Friday Evening, Jan. 8. King Sol
omon's Chapter No. 4, R. A. M. Stated
Convocations-
POOL, BILLIARDS
TO BE PERMITTED
Minors Between Eighteen and
Twenty-one Can Play at
Y. M. C. A. Building.
POLICE BOARD DECIDES
COMMISSIONERS WERE INFORM
ED INSTITUTION WAS PRIVATE
CLUB AND THE LAW DID NOT
APPLY TO IT.
"
:cs Attorney wane xauu una m
a a. x 1 T - JJ -V JL.
Young Men's Christian Association at
torneyS) Wilfred Jessup and A. M
rio 4V, H, -..-ill nnt
take any action against the associa-
tion for permitting its senior members
... f 1S . ?1 .
P13 0001 and billiards. The advice of
the attorneys in tne case was mat tne
y m.'C. A. is a private club and can
AratA . v;thn..t viihiH.
'
luo vue m7 mcmucia
or the police board stated today taat
Knie BS the law was violated the board
would not take any action.
The state law Drovides that no ml
nor Bhall play Jool or binlards but the
attorneys interpret this section to
ihat mnnrs, j,rA restricted from
playing in public pool and billiard par
lors and saloons. It is not effective
in regard to. private residences and
clubs,
Parents of boys between the ascs of
IS end 21 years, who axe members of
the Y. M. C. A. do not object to their
offspring indulging in pool or billiard
Sf lonE. aa thev Dlav on. the Y. II. C
A tables but they have 8trenuous
objection8 to their playing in public
pjaces
1 '
-aw "toreemem
It is well known by every parent
io the city that the enforcement of
the law in regard to minors playing
peel and billiards in public parlors
has been laxly enforced In the past.
one parent stated tne other day that
jf us Doy was not permitted to play
1Hol and billiards in the T. M. C. A
tnat woum refuse to war his son's
membership dues. "I want him to play
in the a8S0Ciati0n building, because if
he does not I know he will visit pub
lie places either run in connection
with cigar stores or saloons, as he has
in the past," stated this man.
. Commend Board's Action.
Proprietors of these parlors stated
"s morning mat tney oeaeve ine
i.o.
to determine a young man's age. E?en
" ?u know he ls a minor, he will tell
yiii that he is m." rnis statement
was made today by a pool room pro
prietor,
CRIMINAL CODE
COMMITTEE FOR
SEN. R. KIRKMAN
, (Continued From Page One.)
son and Henry, chairman; committee
not completed.
Criminal Code Senator Kirkman
0f Wayne and Union, chairman; com
mittee not completed.
Public Library Senator Hanna, of
Boone and Hendricks, chairman: com
mittee not completed.
Swamp Lands and Drains Senator
H.,u.k nf Tasnpr Npvtnn stark
and White, chairman; committee not
...
1 rnm nloton
Military Affairs Senator Brady, of
Fulton and Wabash, chairman; com
mittee not completed.
Manufactures Senator Gonnerman,
of Gibson and Posey, chairman; com
mittee not completed.
Telegraph and Telephones Senator
apnuger, ui
Bartholomew and De-
caiur CBd,railB' mme com-
Pietea
ley. cnairman ; committee not com-
pietea
Legislative Apportionment bena-
tor Kllng, of Howard and Miami,
chairman; committee not completed.
Rivers and Waterways Senator
Bowser, of Lake and Porter, chair-
man; committee not completed
Soldiers and Sailors Monument
Senator Brady, of Fulton and Wabash,
chairman; committee not completed.
Committee on Rules Senator Fork-
ner, of Madison and Henry, chairman;
Senator Cox. of Marion; Lieutenant
Governor Hall
Scott's Emulsion
clothes the nerves and
muscles with. warm fat,fills
the veins with rich bloo'd.
t- uriJ
i iiic uiuuicil lUfcycu
and hardy and fearless of
ti t j Jr. ..
the COld. It fills the Whole
body with warmth and life
and energy.
Thin people sometimes
gain a pound a day while
taking it
Send this adwtlauueat together rith
Mtaas. aatd m wffl ssi
Haaf AliMaf Mm Wests"
SO3TT&B0Waa!W3ti-st.NsT
tad foot
leysa a
K. G. E. INSTALLS
JEW OFFICERS
Special Car to Carry Delega
tion to Inaugural.
Officers of the Knights of the Gold
en Eagle were installed Tuesday eve
ning and are as follows: Past chief,
Elgie Ryan; Noble Chief, Henry Mar-
tindale; Vice Chief, "William Ward;
High Priest. J. H. Bailey; Master of
Records, J. F. Kauffman; Keeper of
Exchequer, J. B. Beckwith; Clerk of
Exchequer, F. P. Brooks; Sir Herald,
E. Eliason; Hermit, Melvln Barker;
Ensign, C. E. Phelps; Esquire, Wil
liam Issenhaus; Weather Chamber,
William Bricker; Inside Guard, John
Bertsch; Outer Guard, Charles Hiles;
Weather Bard, Marion Thomas.
MARSHALL COULD
NAME THE SENATOR
BUT DECLINES TO
(Continued From Page One.)
the fellows who have had their
weather eye glued to that job. For
instance, Joe Reiley, secretary of the
democratic state committee. Joe has
hin f i en r in t- nn hft nil inrftnrhin I
--o o - ' -
l l.,, rananllr luu .i.i.antaj nn.
til recently that he would land it, but
it is a cinch that if the salary is plac-
ed at anything like 1,200 he will not
take it. Then he will be told that he 1
can either take it or leave it and Joe
will probably get mad. And Tom The caucus, which was called to or
Taggart will also be offended, for der at 7:30 o'clock in. Room 53, state
Reiley ls one of Taggart's lieutenants, house, was presided over by Harry
Marshall said last night that he will
set apart one night each week as "at
home" evening when persons who
cannot see him in the day time may
call at his home and talk business,
This is the first time that a governor
has ever opened his house to the pub-
lie in this manner. Marshall says ev-
erybody will be welcome, whether he
wishes to talk business or visit social-
ly and that the "at home" evenings
will be a regular institution at his
house.
He says he Is not going to Tide in
a carriage to the inaugural ball next
Monday night, after his inauguration,
He says street cars are good enough.
"I don't know what I will do at that
dance," he said, referring to the inau-
gural ball. "I never danced in my
life.
THE BACK OF THE NECK.
Make It Proof Against Drafts and
Colds In the Head.
"When I was a boy," id a doctor,
"I didn't believe in drafts. I thought
that they who imputed colds to drafts
were cranks. But one November
night at a concert I felt all the even
ing a strong draft on the back of my
neck. It was so strong it resembled a
suction pump. 'Now, said I to my-
self, 'we'll see If this draft will give
yours truly a cold. "
He shuddered.
"For a week," he said, "I was laid
up with so vile a cold that I couldn't
breathe save with my mouth open.
And now I am satisfied that nine out
of every ten colds are solely due to a
draft on the back of the neck.
"I know how to prevent such colds.
Hence I may practically say that I
know how to prevent all colds. It is a
fact that none of my patients, thanks
to my method, know what a cold ls.
"They learn from me to do this to
bathe the back of the neck every
HA.-M.f-mM Iw. aa11 marAsi TKna rha a visit
w"""
becomes hardened. It becomes draft
proof.
"And when a new patient peculiarly
sensitive to colds, vialts me, my pecul
iar treatment is to blow on the back
of his neck with a bellows for several
days In succession. The bellows. In
conjunction with the Icy douche, frees
him from all future susceptibility.
Thenceforth bis winters pass without
that horrid winter pest, a bad cold."
New Orleans Times-Democrat
Colored Preacher's Text.
A colored man in Atlanta, Ga., ls a
preacher on Sundays and a barber on
Week days. One Of his customers
makes it a rule to be first In the chair
on Monday morning, when he is mre
oi peiug emenameu oy a resume
uuv.c
At night the family always looked for
the latest from the colored brother.
This was one of his recent effusions
"Yesterday I took for my text 'Clean
liness am next to godliness,' and I
dun reach my climax wid dis argu
ment: 'Now, what day follows Sun
day? Why, Monday. Monday Is
wash day in all well reglated fam-
blies. Monday comes nex to Sun-
day; so, my bredden, that settles it
that the words of my tex am true.
Chicago Record-Herald.
Toe Much Quiet.
On one occasion the hustling and
energetic archbishop of York, Dr.
Maclagan, wrote to the vicar In an
outlying village suggesting that he
should lead his church for the purpose I
of giving the clergy of tha district a
"quiet day" for meditation and frater
nal reunion. The witty vicar of this
sleepy hamlet in the wolds promptly
replied:
My Dear Lord Archbishop Your wry
kind latter to hand. But what the people
In this vinage want most la their spiritual
life is not a "quiet day." but an artb-
auavka.
London Standard.
Aw Appeal For Mercy.
Judge," said the prisoner, "I sup -
pose you're going to soak me.1
lou are a habitual offender, re
plied the judge; "were caught with the
ttttJXJZra l-Ily and before some of
to do Its painful duty.'
"I dont want to seem unreasonable,"
replied the prisoner. T don't mind a
ions sentence, rm used to it But
say. judxc eat out the lecture that
uaualtv coca with ft- wm-t vnn
LeSaer.'
HOimil ELECTED
SPEAKER OF HOUSE
BY DEMOCRATS
Seymour Statesman Has
Weak Opposition and Lands
His Fat Job Almost With
out a Struggle.
VICTOR OVER GARRARD
BY LARGE MAJORITY
Republican Senators Meet and
Unanimously Select Sena
tor Wood President Pro
TernHuffman Seretary.
Indianapolis, Jan. 7. The Demo
cratic majority in the lower branch
of the General Assembly, which op-
ened toda-v in caucus last nicht. de-
cided upon the following officers:
Speaker Thomas M. Honan, Sey
T-!I1 -.l T. 1-1- T ttr --- j
ViCl n. xi . o. . - laru.
lecatur.
Assistant Clerk William Habcr-
mel, Corydon.
Chief Doorkeeper Ex-Representa-
tlve Thomas Barclay, College Corner.
Strickland of Greenfield. T. E. Chris-
ney of Spencer acted as secretary and
Representatives D B Hostetter of Put-
nam county and A. F. Zearing of Mar-
ion county acted as tellers.
The closest contest was for assist-
ant secretary, which was won by one
vote by William Habermel of Corydon
over J Fred France of Huntington
Nominations for the various offices
and the results of the ballots were as
follows:
Speaker.
Thomas M. Honan, Seymour 43
James Garrard, Yincennes 13
p l Coble. Dubois 0
Neither Mr. Honan, Mr. Garrard
nor Mr. Coble voted.
Chief Clerk.
Dr. J. W. Vizard, Decatur 3
Charles Crawley, Sullivan 14
Michael Carroll, Crawfordsville 10
Assistant Clerk.
William Habermel, Corydon 3
J. Fred France, Huntington 29
Chief Doorkeeper.
Thomas Barclay, College Corner... 49
O. T. Dickerson, Spencer
Cornelius .Cunningham, Crawfords
ville
Only One Absentee.
The caucus, which was a harmon
ious one, and' continued for about
three hours, was attended by all the
democratic members of the house
save WTarren N. Hauck of Lawrence-
burg, who ls suffering from a broken
leg.
The speakership race, chief in in
terest,, was generally conceded to Mr.
Honan and the belief he- would win
became stronger when Representative
Behymer announced his withdrawal.
His supporters, while not considered
numerous, went to the Seymour man.
Representative Garrard, upon the vote
being announced, moved to make
unanimous the election of Mr. Honan.
The caucus did not elect either a
floor leader or a caucus chairman.
The former position probably will go
, . . .JT ' . ,T
to Mr. Garrard and the latter to Har
ry Strickland, who presided.
A resolution was passed which will
place a senator in the chair when
joint sessions are held. Senator Stot-
senberg will be chosen.
Republican Senate Caucus. ,
While the democratic majority of
the house was electing officers and
getting ready for the work of the ses
sion, the republicans of the senate,
meeting in Room S3 of the state house
were planning to take hold of things
in the senate.
In addition to nominating officers
Wh he elected tndav thA rnnh.
lleail senotor!, rreed nnon the com-
mtttees, decided upon the distribution
of pmona and planned amendments
. fh . a, hv ihlph thev will have
charge of things in the senate, despite
the fact that Lieutenant . Governor
Frank Hall, who is a democrat will
preside' over the sessions of the sen
ate. The officers agreed upon were
as follows:
President pro tem. Will R. Wood,
Lafayette.
Principal Secretary W. W. Huff
man. Anderson.
Assistant Secretary Harry N
Sty-
ner, Lafayette.
Principal Doorkeeper J. W. Thorn
berg, Evansville.
PLATFORM LIKED
emu. CLUB
Measure of Indianapolis Com
mercial Club Endorsed.
The merchants platform, as pro
posed by the Indianapolis Commercial
club and endorsed by civic commer-
Hai and nolitlcal oreanizations of the
Etate was brought to the attention of
the Young Mens Business nun at its
meeting and was referred to the prop
er committee. This action was taken
the members understood the subject
matter, because of the lateness of the
hour. However, the members express-
tDefelve? af favoring the bill to-
ine piauorm was puoasneu
some time ago in inese columns.
Ie Was si Hit "CMy
Strong claims were made by a trav
eling man last week while in A. G. Lu-
ken & Cos Drug Store regarding a
rheumatic remedy called Rheumaline.
Upon Investigation it was found he
sold it, but his claims were so at var
iance with the results of the usual
rheumatic cure that special interest
was manifested and positive proof
presented. It seems too much cannot
be 'said about this remedy In its par
ticular line for it must be understood
it does not cure everything. It does
cure Rheumatism, Lumbago, Sciatica,
Neuralgia, Gout and Kidney, Liver,
Bladder, Stomach and Blood troubles
caused by Uric Acid, for it atacks the
cause, removes it and stops its for
mation. It contains no iujurious
drugs or opiates, therefore, it is Im-
THE SCRAP BOOK
Hs Forgot.
So absentmlnded was a certain Xew
England farmer that he couldn't open
his mouth without making an arrant
ass of himself. Once he courted a
young woman. His suit looked prom
ising for a time. Tueu, with a sor
rowful visage, he ceased his court-,
ship.
"Yet she seemed Infatuated with you.
Jabes," said a friend to whom he went
for sympathy.
"She were, too." Jabez agreed. v
"Well, what could have been the
trouble?"
"Dunno," said he. "Dunno, but when
I proposed she turned me down cold."
"Perhaps your proposal wasn't ar
dent enough T'
"Oh. it was fiery," said Jabez. "Hot
as pepper. I told her she was the only
Woman I'd ever loved, ever looked at,
ever thought of or"
"But," said his friend, "you forgot,
then, you were a widower."
"Jingo," said Jabez, "so I did
PRIDE.
Tou're holding your head too hlghj
Tou're the slave of a foolish pridst
With your face to the starry sky
Tou would try to look dtsnlned.
But you're tramplinc on the flowers
That around your pathway He;
Tou are crashing the blossoms beneath
your feet.
And you never can see In your blind con
celt. For you're holding your head too high.
You are holding your head too high.
Tou have nothing to Rive but a sneer.
You are passing your old friends by
For the new. who are less sincere.
Ah. 'tis all very well, my dear.
With a proud and scornful eye.
To look up at the stars in this world of
ours.
But you'll often forget to look down at
the flowers
When you're holding your head too
high.
Maurice O'Neill.
Swallowed the Objection. .
A cannibal chief became converted
and asked the missionary to admit him
to the church.
"But you have more than one wife,"
objected the missionary. "My church
does not allow that."
The chief departed In dejection, but
returned again in a few days and an
nounced, with evident satisfaction,
that he now had only one wife and waa
ready for baptism.
"But" objected the clergyman doubt
fully, "where are your other wives?"
"Oh," replied the convert, "I have
eaten them!"
On the Safe Side.
The "colored lady" who entered serv
ice as cook gave her name as Juletta
Price, but constantly referred to her
husband as George Ledbetter. "How
does It happen. Juletta." she was asked
one day, "that you go by the name of
Price, while your husband's name ls
Ledbetter?" "Well, you see, Mrs. Law
rence," she .replied cheerfully, "It's
this a-way. I badn been acquainted
with George but fo' days when I mar
ried him, an' I dldn know how I was
gonter lak him nor bow he was gonter
lak me. Now, these divorcements be-
twlx married folks Is a heap er trou
ble an' a heap er expense, too. an I
'lowed the safest way fer us to do wus
fer George to keep his maiden name
an' to keep mine tell we see bow our
new experiment was gonter turn out"
His Authority.
Dr. Magrath was eccentric. One day
he was called up to visit a sick man
and as he entered the room said cheer
fully, "How do you do?" "Oh. doctor,"
replied the patient plaintively, ."I am
dead." Magrath Immediately wheeled
about and left the room and actually
reported that the man was dead. The
mistake waa discovered the following
day, when some one took the doctor
to task for issuing a false certificate.
"I did It upon the very highest au
thority." Magrath explained, "for I
had It from the man's own mouth."
Frao Medical Advice.
The celebrated French physician Tftl
cord was one day walking along the
boulevards in Paris when he met an
old gentleman who was very rich, but
who was at the same time noted for
his extreme stinginess. The old man,
who was somewhat of a hypochon
driac, imagined that he could get some
medical advice from BJcord without
paying for It
"Doctor, I am feeling very poorly."
"Where do you suffer most?"
"In my stomach, doctor."
ajl inais oaa. rtease sour youri
eyes. Now put out your tongue CO that
t .
I can examine it closely.
The Invalid did as he was told. After
he bad waited patiently for about ten
minutes he opened his eyes and found
himself surrounded by a crowd, who
supposed that he was crazy. Dr. Ri-
cord in the meantime had disappeared,
-
Divino Love.
Just as a mother would not love a
child th bertetvjror Its being turned
flair faEaafl out? Troubled with datldnifl? Want snore hair? An
llrgl'CtfifclllS? Cmm
We believe doctors endorse this
this
Does o-doI C
possible to hurt the stomach or af
feet the heart. The liver is the prin
cipal organ upon which it works so it
acts as a tonic as well as a cure.
After due consideration Mr. Luken
decided to put his reputation and lo
cal high standing behind Rheumaline
for he was thoroughly convinced it is
the best remedy for its special pur
pose ou the market today. A. G. Lu
ken & Co. is the sole agent in Rich
iuond and the price of Rheumaline is
11.00 per bottle. Rheumaline capsules
which are part of the treatment and
aro to be used fo severe pain, cost
50c per box. When cor.stipated.
Rheumaline tablets only should be
used. They cost 25c These three
may be procured at A. G. Luken ft
Co's Drug Store. Get Rheumaline at
once. It removes the cause.
into a-tnoaei or: Verlectfon iy one
stroke of magic, but does love it the
more deeply every time It tries to be
good, so I do hope and believe our
Great Father does not wait for us to
be good and wise to love us. but loves
us and loves to help us in the very
thick of our struggle, with sin and
folly. Juliana Horatia Ewlng.
Kind of Grandpa. '
An old farmer was sitting In tha
garden under a pear tree enjoying his
after dinner pipe and the weekly pa
per, and his little granddaughter play
ed about among the flowers.
"Here, dranpa," she said, " oo drink
Is nice mtlk."
1 He didn't want it, of course, but
rather than hurt the little child he
gulped it down.-
She took back the empty cup and
toddled away. He heard her murmur
ing as she went:
"l's kind to dranpa 'cause he's old."
Pretty, soon she toddled back with
another cup of buttermilk, and the
good hearted old man, putting down
bis paper and p'p. tossed off the
warm mixture with a feigned smile of
Joy.
"I's kind to dranpa 'cause he's
old," she repeated. And in a little
while she brought another cup of
milk. The grandfather drank four or
five of these offerings, and then for
fun he followed the little girl to see
where she was getting all that milk.
Her way led straight to the hogpen,
and as she filled her cup at the hog
trough the horrified farmer heard her
say piously:
"I'a kind to dranpa Jcause he's
old."
A Deceiver.
Lablche was once asked to support
as a candidate for the academy a cer- .
tain literary mendicant but. hesitated,,,,
for a long time and yielded only when
he was told that If the ambitious au
thor should fall to be elected he would
die of It Failure nevertheless did
come, and the following year, when a
second vacancy occurred. Labiche's
vote was once more solicited la the
man's behalf. "No." shouted Lablche
In vehement Indignation; "I will not
vote for a man who docs not keep hit
word. He did not die."
He Fait the Fir.
A millwright was converted to th
way of thinking of a sect which peri
odically was inspired with a fore
knowledge of the imminence of the
day of doom and set the date, props r-
ins for Gabriel's greeting.
! The date was set and the day came.
' The millwright donned his white rob
. and went out into the fields to await
the coming meeting with the celes
tial throng. The day passed until It
was late In tha afternoon, and th
millwright having arisen at the stroke
of midnight on the morn of the event
ful day, grew drowsy and. throwing
himself down upon a pile of bay. fell
asleep at his watch.
Boys discovered him, and. with the
natural mlschlcvousness of boys, they
set fire to the bay. The suiol-.e and
the beat soon woke the slumbering
millwright and. sitting up - with a
start he cried with the anguish of the
lost:
"Just as I expected in bell after
aiir ' ' '
T really never saw such a storm la
all my life."
"Pardon me, my friend; since you
'saw the storm no doubt you can tell
us what color It waa."
"Certainly 1 can! The wind blew
and the storm rose, you ninny!" Liv
erpool Mercury. r
cu
IN ONE DAY
Mnvoa-a Cold Bemrdr Biterea tha
throat sad nags slmot ln.nea.ate-
y- Checks Fever, stops I;iL-harges t
nom tmke aw.T ,u ,cb mariM
caoaed by folds. It rates Grip aad ob-
piSl1'- rw,, .
! Ilsve yon stiff er swoiiea Joints, ao mmt.
nen-s.f.
how onirklr too win be rareL
j . ,,f J kMnT or bladder troa.
' vu.um. . -
strong and restores lost powers.
PALLADIUM WANT ADS, PAY,
HAIR VIGOU
tbnnula.
formula, or we woaU not put ft fa.
tor 10t3 Injc:!:
i
i
. -rrrrinfn srsMasss

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