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"W. :",1 A 'i I I if' I: ?$:• tt^s- Of course, it's part of the dressing." '-r ,•, A CRUEL REMARK. He threatened to drown himself if I refused him. What did you say? I told him he couldn't use me as a life preserver. THE BRIDE'S SALAD. "Lojk, darling! What's that in the salad?" said he, His astonishment freely expressing. "Why, of all things!—a button!" she gasped. "Oh, I see KEEP AWAY FROM GERMANY. Toucan: "Leaving us?" Stork: "Yes, thought I'd take a little trip to France—for a rest.1 4 1 MORE THAN LIKELY. Ruth (reading from novel)—He kissed her on the forehead. The proud leauty drew herself up. Vera—I suppose that was to get her cheek u» to the proper height A .Caf SAVED OTTUMWA COURIER, PAGE COlt Ll'L FELLER., fyrt'T t)E?^ YOUNG man and a canoe landed together at the hotel, and the young man gave the orders about AT THE BALL GAME. Englishman (after 5th inning)—I say, old man, when do they serve the tea? American Friend—They don't serve tea at a ball game. Englishman—No tea between in- I Had the Usual Success CORRECT. "Race course? That's a queer Willie, can you name the chief prod- name." uct of Mexico. "Not at all. You have to race or Yes'm. Trouble. you don't get anything at all." FROM VEW DE/SD! WHAT ROSIE SAW AT THE MOVIES.- •RY|HAT! Back from the country BO ill nlnge. Then what's the object of the he gave thousands of dollars for a seat blooming game. on the Stock Exchange." soon? I thought you went up to %%r that little place where you could get board for $6 and $7 a week so that you could save money." "I did." "Had It all figured out that the longer you could keep your family there the better off you would be." "That's right." "And yet you're back." "Yes, I'm back, and say!" "Well?" "You couldn't loan me fifty, could you?" WILD SCRAMBLE. "How many courses do they have?' whispered the city man who was about to take his first meal in the country boarding house. "Only one," replied the old boarder, "and we call that the 'race course.' Romantic Rosie And The Movies A BEAST! OO IVST FE^O MI»S, I WILL. KILL HI|v) [saved! Efr e| HELP! ?UICK\ SAVE ME PROM THAiT HORRIBLE BE/ysrr! VjpMi. oH, My HERO'. HOW cm EVER TH(\HK VOU TOR Sty/1 mmm '^•r-'r'' HERE TftRE LotoYl FOOL. II 5, ME FROMTHKT, KW/FUV- feEAST I FRrcrVs! MADE ^OOK®) LIKE & KAI MOUSE! RUMa «-\U^7r JWO ^THEVS, OR OF f^WWTOrtB, Why He Brought It. having the craft put into the lake. The guests crowded around to make their comments, and they were most favorable to the young man and the canoe. It was the concensus of I opinion that the craft cost at least a hundred dollars, and that it's owner would make a gallant show with it. ,9 O A No IV N IT Every hour for the next three days the guests were on the watch, but the canoe remained tied to the bank. Finally, the young man was asked: "That is your canoe, Isn't it A PERFECT BEAR. Emma—"My husband is the most inconsistent man." Muriel—"What has he done, now?" Emma—"He said he was too poor to buy new drawing room furniture, yet WWiiPiiiNliWp()itfW»iWWiP4^ 1 you kootc MKr 0£Iimt GoHow MOCH S^wfNRY Do Voo KKPRCT rvg*uw-SEEtiV AS HOW IjOOK 5o 0RIGHT, HOW DOES YEN THOU HIT V6-R? OH, MEAVEH51. MOUSE.'. HELP! SAVED', OH! ISN'T HE THE I HS?O? ~PBJB "Oh, yeth," he lisped in reply. "Does it leak?" "No, thir." "Is it up here for service?" "Yeth, thir, if anybody wants it," "But why don't you use it?" "Because, while I lisp, thir, I am no damphool. I brought it for show!" FUN yOU'Dman have known he was a med ical by his looks and by the medicine case he carried, but the man who bumped into him on the street was too excited about something else. "Here, sir, what are you doing?" exclaimed the doctor as he recovered from the collision. "Going to lick a man!" was the re ply- "But wait. Don't you know it's 90 degrees in the sun?" "I don't care a darn!" "And that fighting will raise your temperature to 140?" "What of it?" "A temperature of 139 means sun stroke and death!" (3.® SUPPLY LIMITED. How'd you like to have all the ice cream you wanted* Aw, there ain't that much in the world! Shut up! mm* '1"' W- POINTED. Reggy—Yes, although it is blooming monotonous I turn In every night at 9 o'clock sharp. Peggy—How do you manage It? Reggy—Manage what? Peggy—Why, to turn in sharp after being so dull. EMBARRASSING. Dolly gave herself away awfully yesterday. How? One of the boys insisted she had a fiery temper because her hair auburn and to win the argument she had to admit it was dyed. Some Medical Advice f1"»um 'I mil wy-jw^uiiiiw nj^h. 1 "Are you a doctor?" asked the man. "I am." "Then you are way off your base. The man I'm going to lick work* In HER6.5IR, V/HAT AftE VOU SXCLATKVGA THE -BOATOA an ice house, where the temperature is only 60 above, and oh, jeeswax, how I will make him holler!" I "But—" "Oh, I brought along my oVereoat so I shouldn't take cold doing it! ThanKs, Doc—I'm all right!" THEWill .*j! ,,1 ———_— RIGHT. man who owns a baby tell you how It howls, He'll swear the kid's a nuisance, And, goodness, how he scowls!. But if you say you know it, And at the baby scoff, The dad, you'll find, is ready, 1 To knock your head clear off. EX-COLLEGIATE. "Where, oh, where are the grave old seniors?" I is a scng we've often sung They are all offlce-boys at pi Starting at the lowest rung.