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gfcc prison fEinm*.
THURSDAY. Jan. 0. 1890. PRISON OFFICIALS. MANAGERS. JOHN F. NOKRISH Hastings. EDWIN DUNN Eyota. JAS. S. O’BRIEN Stillwater. FRANK TEMPLE Blue Earth City. M. O. HALL Duluth. RESIDENT OFFICIALS. J. J. RANDALL Warden. S. A. LANGUM.. . Deputy Warden. FRANK BERRY Clerk. H. E. BENNER Steward. B. J. MERRILL Physician. C. R. KEYES Hospital Steward. W. R. BRANNAN Storekeeper. J. H. ALBERT Protestant Chaplain. M. E. MURPHY Catholic Chaplain. MRS. H. A. WALKER Matron. GUARDS’ REGISTER. T. W. ALEXANDER Day Cell Room Guard. W. W. HALL Night Cell Room Guard. A. W. ROWE Night Cell Room Guard. ANDREW MEEHAN Hall Guard. HANS ERICKSON Gate Guard. ALEX. McKAY Guard. ROYAL C. ORFF Guard. F. M. BOIIDWELL Guard. BEN. CAYOU Guard. HENRY J. JENKINS Guard. R. G. RHOADES Guard. PATRICK FLANNERY Guard. GRKENLEAF DORR Wall Guard. CHARLES. P. AUSTIN Wall Guard. P. J. MURPHY Wall Guard. JOHN S. MAY Wall Guard. GODFRIEI) RIS Wall Guard. HENRY FROST Wall Guard. L. B. GOLDSMITH Night Guard. LESTE R BOHDWELL Guard. JOHN ME ALE Y Guard. WM. M. MAY Guard. LOCAL PICKINGS. —Teamsters are good at driving bargains. —The religious sphere—The fear of God. —Tip-ical men of America—Hotel waiters. —A striking picture—John L.'s silhouette. —The sword thrust was the principal ancient monopoly. —We have one subscriber in Salt Lake City. He is a Gentile. —J. L. Westewelt, of Minneapolis, was a sight seer here yesterday. —lt is rumored that we are soon to have a school in the prison. —Population, 354: 179 on contract and 163 on state work. Infirm, 12. —A broaen pitcher is often better than a new one in the baseball business. —Mrs. H. R. Burrell, of Minneapolis, was shown the prison by the Matron, Saturday. —Mr. Carl Randall has been confined to his home for the past week by sickness. —Mr. N. L. Stein, of Stillwater, called in Mon day and made THE MIRROR a dollar richer. —Deputy Warden Langum was caught by Mons. La Grippe, but has not sucurabed to his powers. —Waldron M. erome. Minneapolis: G. Iverson and M. A. MacDonald, St. Paul, were in the prison last Sunday. —Sheriff Brooks brought in two men from Blue Earth Co. this week. They will linger with us for one year. —Mrs. Rhoda Brink has not been enjoying good health of late and has not been out of the house for some time. —A large party of Stillwater and St. Paul ladies were escorted through the prison by Deputy War den Langum, Saturday. —Mrs. S. J. Preece, of Winona, Minn., who is at present a teacher of elocution in St. Paul, was the guest of the Warden’s family yesterday. —Supt. Coveil has been working around all kinds of machinery for about 40 years without re ceiving the slightest mutilation or serious injury. —"O, consistency! thou art a jewel.’’ Last sum mer the librarian wore a scull cap to keep his head warm: this winter he is wearing his straw hat. —E. G. Spindle, city; A. L. Buck, St. Paul; Mrs. and Leo Richter, Pelican Rapids; and Miss Olive Ingerman, Litchfield, visited this institution last week. —There is very little difference between an im pecunious lawyer and a mangy dog: One has to scratch for fees and the other for fleas before he can take his ease. —One of our late arrivals is only six feet five inches tall. It may sound a little paradoxical nevertheless he will belong and be long here whether he is here long or short. —We have received two subscriptions within the past week from inmates of the Charlestown, Mass., state prison. Accept our thanks, boys, and let us hear from you occasionally. —There are about twenty men directing their papers each week to Wm. Murphy, Hyersville, Neb. What is the matter with Pat, Dennis, Larry, Micky and the rest of the Murphys? —Mr. Arthur Peterson. Redwing; Mr. C. Boo reen. Master Arthur Booreen and Misses Winnie and Josie Booreen, Stillwater, formed a pleasant group of visitors to our quarters last Friday. —There is afortune awaiting the man who can design a method to stop the infernal noise of steam heating apparatus as exemplified in the radiators employed in this institution. A political caucus is a Quaker meeting when compared to the nightly carousals of the steam coils here. —One of the boys working in the tub and pail factory came near losing an arm one day last week. His coat sleeve caught in the buzz saw and it was a mere chance his arm was not cut off. —Mr. J. A. Westby, late deputy warden, was in and shook hands Monday. His family will occupy the deputy warden’s residence until spring, when Deputy Langum will bring his family to Stillwater. —The old bake shop is being converted into a tin shop and blacksmith shop. A workbench has been put in and a forge is being built. All the state blacksmithing and tin work will be done in this shop. —The shoemakers and the tailors are the hard est worked men about the prison these days. Five hundred yards of striped cloth was received last week and is now being made up as fast as pos sible. —A packet of letters bearing foreign post marks and addressed to Cbas. Grossman. Minnesota pen itentiary, may be had by the owner if he will make himself known to the Warden or the prison postmaster —As the criminal calender for 1890 is not likely to be much of an improvement on the mildewed arrangement of preceeding years, we would advise people to be satisfied with the ones they get at insurance offices. —When Shakespeare compared life to a play on the stage he did not count upon the professional “heavy villains’’ quiting for Canada at the com mencement of an important act. This probably is why so many “supes” are assigned to that part. —Several of the guards have fallen victims to seductive la grippe. Mr. Ben Cayou lias had the severest attack of any of his fellows. Mr. Ris was laid up for a tew days, but he is t >o tough and well seasoned for such an effeminate disease to get the best of. —Mr. Charles F. Anderson, of Minneapolis, was around through the prison with Warden l’andall, Tuesday. Mr. Anderson formerly resided at Rochester, this state, and is au old settler. He and the Yi’arden have been acquaintences for thirty years. —The snow and cold has put a stop to further masonry work on the wall. Monday evening Foreman Carlgren called his men off and told them to gather up the tools and stack them away in the shanty. The boys were not sorry to aban don the work for it was becoming a little too cool for comfort. Mr. Carlgren says he will “roust about” around at odd jobs until “spring, gentle spring,” comes again. Work has begun to boom in the tub and pail factory. We were up there the other day and found Supt. Covell enca-ed in blue overalls and pine dust, flying about from one machine to an other showing his men how to make j ails. There is not a man in the shop that even so much as saw a pail made before, consequently the work is not progressing very rapidly at present. But the men are learning as fast as could be expected, and tbe Supt. is not kicking. Quite a stack of unfinished pails are accumulating and tbe shop has every ap pearance of enterprise nnd coaheadativeness. —There is an easily discernible vacuum in the average social amenities and “small talk" of life. Upon entering tbe yard tbe morning after the late snowstorm we were greeted with "It snowed last night.” This was certainly a profound truth, as the material proof of it wits visible on all sides. But why need we be told it? Simply because people must talk, you know: but now that we are in a better humor alter thinking the matter over, we conclude that just as senseless things have been said by ourselves and every one else as well, and we will cheerfully accept the "vacuums’’ in consideration of the good intentions of the speak ers. —One of the visitors to the prison this week upon entering our sanctum gave vent to a sup pressed sigh of mingled retrospection and blended hope as he complimented us on our pleasant quarters, saying lie w shed he had had as good when he was a boy. As we did not quite agree with him in regard to any life being worse than that of a prisoner, he told us at great length about his many hardships on board a whale-ship when a boy. among the least of which he said, was drink ing the water-bewitched and ten-begrudged de coction they had at meals, and taking a sheath knife at night time to find the softest plank of the deck to sleep on. We do not doubt but the gen tleman had a hard time of it, still we will take the whaler every time in preference to prison. —The irrepressible Farmer Rose is up and at it again. Rose is a good-natured, easy-going chap who does not pay much attention to the latest jokes, bu he swears condign punishmeut on the next man that mentions McGinty in his presence. A few nights ago one of the men called Rose to his cell door and requested him to go up to McGinty’s cell to get a jackknife the gentleman had loaned him during the day. Rose expressed his pleasure at being able to do a man a favor HDd started off in search of McGinty’s cell. He asked every one he met in regard to its location, and as all were "on” they sent him in different directions, until Rose, tired from his wanderings, sought the ad vice of a staid Samaritan who informed him of the McGinty craze. We did not hear Rose when he returned to his starting point, but it is said that his language was very expressive. First Native: Mon did ye hear Sandy McDougal was drooned (drowned). Second Native: Eh, mon, that’s awful, and he has got my knife. Scotch Sympathy. Sunday Services. Services were presided over by Rev. J. H. Al bert. His sermon was of a historical nature, and went to show that a nation, a people, or a cause to rise and excel must have a leader. But even this is not sufficient—the nation or the cause must have that in it which is capable of being devel oped; the greatest leader cannot bring to victory a nation that is stagnant, that is unsusceptible to inspiration. Tlie speaker introduced many historical argu ments, dating from the time Moses led his follow ers out of bondage, in support of his argument. Concluding his address he said: To many. Christians Christ is of no practical value, tneir religion is a sort of life insurance pol icy—of benefit only when they come to die. They will question whether they shall do this or that thing, and why they should or should not do it. Christian people sLould stop trying to prove tilings that in themselves are good. Ido not stop to prove tbe Gobi, el—I do not need to prove it. 1 find in it tlie Bpirit which inspires and stimulates us to action. I ask you to consider Christ, to talk about Him. Ask yourself: Is lie a power to lift up. does He set one’s face upwards, that is all we want to know. Pot-Wrestling?. Having taken a decided interest of late in the question of female labor, and burning with the de sire to know whv domestic servics was so repug nant to tbe average young lady who can passively submit to be closed up in a stuffy factory for ten hours out of the twenty-four, we decided to try “pot-wrestling” for a brief period during the after-dinner skirmish. The messroom chief, with a knowing smile and a wink to his men. assigned us to the soap-suds vat wherein tbe soiled tinware is first soused, and told us to sail right in. We sailed and sou-ed for about twenty minutes, when the pastime begun to pal! on us. Globules of sweat fell from our mobile brow and mingled with the soapy ; earls: our fierce moustach wilted in the misty vapor that ascended ceilingwards via our five senses; our milk white patrician hands suc cumbed to tbe “tired feeling” of tbe patent-medi cine ad., but we stood grimly by the post of duty, disregarding the stinging slurs hurled at our shape and moustach by the prosy dish-wollopers, unt.l one of the latter bolder than the rest, insin uated that with such a sweet face and hirsute adornment we could make more money worrying rats than washing dishes. This was too much for us and we quit drubbing dishes to experiment on our insulter, but the hand that never before failed us was now powerless; our finger joints were cut and bleeding from many encounters with the sharp corners of tin dishes, and a general depres sion of sp rits, plainly visible to others, warranted tbe decision that “pot-wrestling” is a failure, and thatthe ucli-abused factory grl is not deficient in horse scents or any of the more expensive brands. Fnele Jake’s Saw Dust. Strange as it may seem a pocket knife is like a wild flower—it opens with tbe spring. Jabez Jordon and Cornelius Cunnim c >rker were once near neighbors and friends. One day Jabez attempted to teach Cornelius how to load a gas pipe to place in tbe melon patch, and while they were arguing over the system of introducing the surprise party to the midnight visitors, their ideas clashed and it was not until the peace craving gas pipe took a hand in it, that they were sepa rated. It is said that they parted suddenly and never to meet again. Oh Jabez and Cornelius where are you now? You monkeyed with powder and darkened your brow. D-d you ever start down hill on a sl ppery morn ing. with a pail <>f slop in each hand, and just as you were nbuut to remark to yourself that tbe sun was coming up with a black eye. have both feet suddenly arise to a level with your brain box. and after balancing on tbe wind for a time, seat your self comfortably between the capsized buckets, and patiently listen to the music of the swill as it fawns with your regulat on stripe trousers? I’ve been there, and I’ll never forget how dramatic ally 1 eulogized those pails as their contents bathed my pedal extremities. Billy: Say, Tom, we’re goin' to hev’ a big dinner New Year’s day. Tom: How do you know? Billy: I heard pa say he’s goin’ to fill up ter the neck New Year’s if it took every cent in his pocket. UNCLE JAKE. On La Grippe. Guard Goldsmith says he is very much afraid that Grover will be our next President, the reason he advances in defense of his opinion is,|that the numerous monopolists and manufacturers who have always been crying. “Protection to American labor; High Tariff, ’’ have just been presented with a sate investment in La Grippe. In fact if we take statistics for it we have at least 300,000 of the protective-tariff men of Massachusetts, New York, Pennsylvania (who placed Ben in his seat,) who are now all swayed by the foreign production. La Grippe. Now I think that tbe “Judge” who was in such high favor with Benjamin might use his influenza with the present adminstration and get Congress to impose an enormous duty, and thereby make of it a luxury whichjonly the rich could obtain who have no use for Russia or its La Grippe. DODO. (The author of the above, it may be seen, has “influenza” with the editor.] Bumpkins says his landlady’s daughter when she sings is like a ship becalmed; her wind gives out on the high C’s.—Park Region Pioneer. Oh, mule! Thou sad, neglected beast. Abused by man throughout thy days, No kind nor loving deeds thou seest, But hardships follow all thy ways. Thon hast unjustly been accused Of kicking people just for fun: But hadst thou not been much abused Thou wouldst not cruel things have done. Thy heart with kindliness is rife, Though thou hast very seldom heard In all thy dreary, toilsome life A friendly, compliment’ry word. But I to you will be a friend; No wrong shall meet you from my band Your graces shall my tongue commend; Not mine to cudgel nor command. And so upon your battered hide I lay my hand of wrong bereft — The poet’s friends are notified To call and get what little’s left. —Stillwater Gazette In University place, the other day, a boy picked up a sparrow which was unable to fly from having daubed its wings with fresh paint from some cor nice. He was carrying it away in his hand when a poorly dressed man. who was warming his back in the autumn sun, held out his hand and asked for it, says the New York Sun. The bird was passed over and the man took a very ragged hand kerchief from his pocket and began wiping at the paint, saying as he did so: "That’s the way of the world—go for a feller when he’s down. Fifty would wring your neck where one would give you a show.’’ He wiped away for a minute or two, and then continued: "If some one would give me an encouraging word and half a show 1 could be a man yet; but somebody won’t do it. It’s easier to kick a man down hill than to boost him up. There, young chap, your wings are all right now. Go and be happy. Next t.me, your nose smells fresh paint you shy off.” He gave the bird a toss, and it flew to tlie naked limb of one of the elms aud then turned about and cried: “Peek! peek!” as if in gratitude. “All right! All right!” replied the man, with a wave of his hand. “Perhaps you’ll do as much for me some time. Go along now and attend to bus iness.” For The Mirror A harder thing to keep than a secret — money. A crooked tree makes a crooked shadow. Censure is tlie tax a man pays to the pub lic for being eminent. Calamity is a man’s true touch-stone. That load becomes light which is cheer fully borne. When we do good to our fellow sufferers, we invest in a savings bank from which' the heart receives the interest. One may be better than his reputation or his conduct but not better than his prin ciples. Blessed are they who expect nothing from any source but Heaven, for they shall not be disappointed. In order to carve out a fortune one must be sharp. Recompense injury with justice, and rec ompense kindness with kindness. In appearance the beer drinker may he the picture of health, but in reality he is most incapable of resisting disease. A slight injury, a severe cold, or a shock to the body or mind, will commonly provoke acute disease, ending fatally. Compared with other inebriates, who use different kinds of alcohol, he is more incurable and more generally diseased. It is our observa tion that beer drinking in this country pro duces the very lowest kind of inebriety, closely allied to criminal insanity. The most dangerous class of ruffians in our large cities are beer drinkers. Intellectu ally. a stupor amounting almost to par alysis arrests tlie reason, changing all the 1 higher faculties into a mere animalism, sen sual, selfish, sluggish, varied only with anger, senseless and brutal.—Scientific American. The Chinese laundrymen in New .York: have formed a laundry trust which embraces twelve hundred laundries. It is very evi dent that John is not as stupid as he looks. If he should ever acquire the right to vote, he will, in a short time, be able to give points to ttie Caucasian. As it is now,even on the Pacific slope John is more than holding his own. In the language of the poet: THE MELANCHOLY MI LE. Helping A Sparrow I'p. Fragments. Tlie Beer Drinker. A Laundry Trust. "You shootee me aud hangee me, You bootee me and bangee me. Me doee workee, gettee boodle, Livee on ratee, poodle: Oh, me livee, oh, so cheapee, And me workee while you sleepee.” —Texas Siftings.