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Krazy Kat fbl. 1913. International Newt Serrlce. The Force Within. Tomorrow: Loop the Loop Anticipation Alio, Bill! I 'aven't seen you for '•ks" Bill's pal stopped sud y. Then: "But wot's wrong, ?" lie asked. "You're lookin' hty seedy. Been ill—eh?" 1) passed a horny hand across his v. •»o." he replied. "I ain't ben ill. work wot s d"in' for me—work n 7 in the morntn' till t> at night. •r:i'y one hour off. Think of It. c'" .aram C"' replied the otlier. "And lona m\ <■ you been there?" ain't been there yet." retorted ' tiegin to-morrer," he added )mily, as he slowly mouched off. The Dingbat Family Polly and Her Pals Us Boys The Ambassador's Wife W E were a dozen friends cele brating ln a cafe the return from Russia of our comrade. Marcel Trival, who had been connected with a St. Petersburg theater for six years and whom we had not seen in all that time. Trival had become very popular ln the czar's capital and had been the pet of the Russian ariatocracy. He had rubbed elbows with princes and grand dukee in the wings of the thea ter, where they were flirting with the French actresses, and he had met them ln the cabarets of Morskoia and at Cubat, and had been a welcome guest at their homes, as, indeed, everywhere in Petersburg society. Of course, he had had no end uf ad ventures and love affairs, though, he did not care to talk about them ex cept ln a general way, and it waa all that we could do to persuade him to tell us one story on the express con dition that we must not press him for more. Thla is the story ln his own words: "One afternoon at 4 o'clock—the fashionable hour for promenades—an elegant troika, drawn by three mag nifleent thoroughbreds in harnesses glittering with silver, sped down the Newsky Prospect. It was skilfully driven by a coachman of gigantic pro portions—and you know that ln Rus sia the proportions of your coachman indicate jour rank and wealth —the bigger he Is the higher his salary, and this one wa s aa big as any of the coachmen of the grand dukes. AT A JEWELRY STORE "The troika stopped In front of one of the most gorgeous jewelry stores In St. Petersburg—that is to say, in the whole world—for nowhere do you sea Jewelry aa in Ruasla. It waa a etore that enjoyed the patronage of the czar himself. "Two ladies in priceless furs got out and entered the establishment, where one of them immediately asked to see the proprietor himself, a per sonage whose annual income muat be c ounted in millions, and who is not accessible to ordinary mortals. "The lady whs young and beautiful, and when she introduced herself as the wife of the ambassador of one of the great powers, the proprietor Im mediately placed himself entirely at her disposal. THE SAX FRANCISCO CALL AND POST, SATURDAY. DECEMBER 27, 1313 "The ambassador in question had been ln St. Petersburg only a few weeks, but he was a man of fabulous weath, and the whole city was talk ing about the magnificence of the series of social entertainments with which he had made his entry, and which had surprised even the fas tidious capital of the czar. " 'My husband,' the lady began, 'wants to make me a present of a tiara of diamonds on my birthday and has asked me to select one my self. I have not quite made up my mind, but I should like to look at some emeralds.' "The proprietor gave an order, and a moment later a magnificent display of most wonderful gems was spread on the velvet table in front of the lady, who slowly and carefully made her choice, regardless of price. At last she ordered a tiara to be made from some of the choicest specimens, and besides she picked out a wonder ful necklace of blue white diamonds and emeralds for which the jeweler asked a price of-210,000 roubles, ex pecting to be asked to knock off the extra 10,000, a thing he was quite prepared to do. The ambassador's wife, however, never thought of haggling and seemed very well satis fled with the price asked. AT THE TEI.KPHOSE " 'And now,' she said, 'kindly let me telephone to my husband that I am coming to show him my purchase right away." "At the telephone she exchanged a few affectionate sentences with her husband, and after hanging up the receiver, turned to her friend and said: ." "You won't mind waiting for me here, dear? I shall be back in a very short time, and we will drive on to gether." "The proprietor respectfully con ducted her to her troika and handed her the case containing the necklace. "Half an hour, an hour, two hours passed and the woman did not return. Her friend began to grow uneasy and nervous, and the affable proprietor was about to ring up the embassy when two gentlemen entered and said they had a very important message for the proprietor. " "We are detectives,' they said tn the surprised proprietor. 'You have i Just had a visit from a lady who pro- OR THE PURLOINED TIARA tended to be the wife of the Austrian minister?' "'Yes; and her friend Is waiting for her here now.' " 'Her accomplice, you mean. She Is one of the cleverest International swindlers in Europe, and we have had her carefully watched for weeks. She Is under arrest now and we have come to arrest her accomplice. Your neck lace is safe and will be handed back to you if you will call at the ofllca of the secret police at 8 o'clock lonight and ask for me. Here Is mv card ' "The detectives carried o.'f the ac complice in spite of her tears and pro tests, and the Jeweler overwhelmed the two men with expressions cf gratitude." "But really. Marcel." aald one of us, "that Is not the kind of story we ex pected to hear. There ia nothing un usual about it; those women wire not even clever enough to get away, and—" "Walt a minute, you are In too much of a hurry. When the jeweler pre sented himself at th ? ofllcei of the police and aaked to ace the man whose card he had. he found himself in the presence of an individual he had never seen before, and a few ex planations made it clear that he had been swindled by a very cleve* quar tet. The detectives had simply come to enable the accomplice to get away, and the police, of course, never found either the necklace or the thieves." Her Vendetta Mrs. Tiptop—l am aorry you were not at my reception fast evening. Mrs. Htghup (coldly)—I received no Invitation. Mrs. Tiptop (with affected sur prise)—lndeed? It must have mis carried. I had among my guests three foreign counts. Mrs. Highup—So that is where they were? I desired to engage them last evening to wait at table at our card party supper, but the employment agent told me they were out. Educated Husband—Do you remember, dar ling, now, when I first married you. you could scarcely say boo to a goose? .Wife—And now I can, SOME PEOPLE'S NAMES F a man cornea along whose j I name la Smith," said the young ' woman who waa telling the story, "or Jonea, and asks me to marry him. I shall accept Instantly and say 'Thank you' Into the bargain! Listen to the things that happened to my sis ter and myself on our trip west all be cause our name is Mayburn! And be cause Cousin Charlie's name is Dutton! "We thought it would be a clever thing to atop ln and see the Flsk*. who live ln Los Angeles, and have wasted reams of paper and gallons of Ink imploring us to visit them. So we telephoned from our hotel in Pasa dena and asked if we might come over Thursday. The sweet voiced young person who answered the phone aald Mrs. Flsk was out, but she knew she would be delighted to see us, and that we must come in time for luncheon. She added that she was Mrs. Flsk's daughter in law, so, of course. It was sll right. " 'The Misses Mayburn and Mr. Dut ton,' we told her. A MISTAKE "Thursday we drove up to the Flsk house, and daughter in law flew out to the curb and greeted ua rapturous ly, trying in the cordial way of the west to make us strangers feel en tirely at home. Greatly cheered, we tramped ln—and were greeted by an absolutely strange woman who waa just as startled as we were. "'lsn't there a —some mistake?' T stuttered. Isn't this the P. C. Fisk home?' " 'It ia the C. P. Flsk residence.' quavered the strange woman. 'Gene vieve told me the Misses Mayburn and Mr. Dutton—and I aald it must be the Misses Duncan and Mr. Maywood— they're friends from San Francisco— and she said no, indeed, it was the other way—and I thought the long distance connection waa poor and she had misunderstood!' " 'We must go at once.' I said hero ically, because I could sniff the luncheon cooking, and It waa evi dently a mighty good luncheon. 'We'll drive to the P. C. Pisks. How did I ever make such a mistake?' "That wasn't the sum total of our adventurea. We went to Vancouver by boat and made friends with the Sacketts on board. We were due to visit the X)area, and the Backett* were Kasi-or Fights Like a Tiger—With His Food (Coprrlgat. 1813 L International Mew* Berrlc«> Shrimp Thinks He's a Pretty Wise LiT Feller (Beriitered Catted Statu Patent office! A SHORT STORY going to visit some relatives in the same locality. As the boat drew ln I thought I saw Mr. Dare on the wharf, and waved and smiled at him for five minutes before I found he was a perfect stranger, who naturally seemed much Interested ln me. "Ten minutes later he was being Introduced to me by the delighted Sacketts, together with his wife. He was the Sacketts relative—and his wife was plainly suspicious of me. But the real Mr. Dare bobbed up, thrust us Into a cab, and. between shaking hands and looking at his watch, explained that he was due at a meeting, but that we were to go right out to the house, where Mrs. Dare was eagerly awaiting us. " Tou know where I live, don't you?' he asked the cabman when we dropped him at a corner. 'Dare's house? Sure,' said the cabman, and hurtled along to I A steaming cup of fragrant I I refreshment —pure, I I wholesome, delicious I [ Iqdgmqys Tea J Just One Quarantine After Another (Copyright. 1813. laterMtloMl Hows Sorrtea) a perfectly gorgeous house set in splendid lawns, dumped us out. slammed our trunk and suitcases into the hall and drove off. "Then a cool, composed trained nurse descended on us. She was perfect. She said Mrs. Dare was out for a drive, but would be so glad to see us, and would we go to our room and have tea sent up— " 'She canft be out." I told her, me chanically. Mr. Dare said he had phoned her that we were on our way to the house and she was awaiting us!' "The trai/ied nurse wrinkled her smooth brow and adopted a soothing tone. 'It's the first time, she explained, 'that she has been driving since the baby came. It is three weeks old and a darling! I know she will be so an noyed at the way they treated your luggage and will have It attended to! Do let me order tea!' "'Stop!' I said faintly. Sister was in a state of collapse against an unfeel ing bronze. 'Mr. Dare is a joker—but he wouldn't go so far as that. Isn't this the Dare house!' " 'It Is the Darr residence,' said the trained nurse. "Then we picked ourselves up wea rily and phoned for a cab and got hot and cold for fear Mrs. Darr would re turn before we grot out. and the trained nurse pathetically Insisted on our having tea anyhow—and the Chi nese servants got our luggage >p"iled on the cab and we drove away. "Then the cabman got lost—and once we passed a house where people were having tea on the veranda, and. behold. It waa the Sacketts and the relative with whom I had scandal ously flirted. " Don't bring them here!' called the relative's wife, who fe]t humorous, now that she had her husband safe. 'Don't bring them here! They tried to get my husband.' "While we laughed feebly and hol lowly we heard a great commotion half a block down. A woman lean ing perilously over a veranda rail was shrieking: 'Bring them here! The luncheon is stone cold!' And it was Mrs. Dare."