Newspaper Page Text
ropTrlgnt. MM*. lnt*r"3tion«t N*«-» Serrie*.
As Gc od as a D ctionary
At the Finish
A witness in a particular case had
been examined by the lawyer of the
plaintiff and was turned over to the
lawyer for the defense for cross ex
•'Now, then. Mr. Smith," began the
legal one, "what did I understand you
to say that your occupation is?"
"I am a piano finisher,-** answered
"Yes, I see," persisted the lawyer;
"but you must be more definite. Do
you polish them or do you move
The Dingbat Family
Polly and Her Pals
A Debt of Honor
Tnrough the bearer of this let
ter I send you the amount I lost
to you in poker last night and which
I gave my word of honor to pay to
I thus keep my word of honor, but
before you take the money I have
something to ask you.
I was Just about to put the money
into an envelope to send It to you
when the bearer, Herr Pollmann, en
tered. I was so surprised to see him
that I dropped the bills on my desk.
You will understand this when I tell
you that for a long time I have owed
him an amount almost similar to the
one I lost to you.
"I see I came In a lucky moment,"
he said. "It was my Intention to re
mind you of your debt to me and I
notice that you are flush."
"You are mistaken," I felt com
pelled to answer. "I must necessarily
use this money to pay a very pressing
"I have never pressed you for pay
men," he replied, "though you have
owed me this money for a long time,
but unfortunately I am forced to de-
a payment now. I need the
money very badly myself, or I should
not have come to you at all. If Ido
not get it, I shall be absolutely ruined
and I have nobody else who owes me
money or who will lend me any."
"That is all very well," I replied,
"but, much as I should like to, I can
not give you this money. The debt I
must pay today is very pressing."
"But how can any debt be more
pressing than yours to me? I saved
you when you were In a desperate
position, without any obligation on
my part, simply because of gratitude
toward your family. I handed »you
over every penny I possessed in the
world without any security but a
single receipt, without any thought
THE SAX FRANCISCO CALL AND TOST. WEDNESDAY. DECEMBER 31. 1913
of myself. Now I need it. I tell you
I am ruined if I do not get the money
tDday. I am not thinking of myself,
but you must remember that I have
a wife and children whom It is my
duty to provide for."
A HARD CASE
"I am so sorry," I said, "but I must
send this money to another."
"And does that other man need it
more than I do, who will be ruined
if I do not get it?"
I was silent, for I did not know if
you really needed the money more
than this man, whose honesty is be
yond any doubt. As a matter of fact,
I remembered that you had said you
would use the money to buy some
diamonds for Flfi, which she had long
wanted. I was Just about to hand
the man the money when I remem
bered that it was impossible. I then
explained to Herr Pollmann that I
needed the money to pay a debt of
"Debt of honor!" he exclaimed. "I
do not qnlte understand the expres
sion. I feel sure that If you had had
the money you would have paid your
debt to me long ago, and If you did
not do so it would have been dis
While I was trying to find an an
swer he went on:
"In my eyes every debt Is a debt of
I Interrupted him:
"No, there is a difference. Tou hava
a receipt proving that I owe you the
money, and were I to die today you
would be paid out of my estate, while
the gentleman whom I owe this
money has no"—
He did not let me finish. Before
I could prevent him he had torn the
receipt to pieces and said: "Now we
are even, h have nothing but your
promise to pay me."
AN INTENSELY DRAMATIC
"But the other man has my word of
"Every promise made by a gentle
man," he replied, "Is a word of honor."
I begged him to wait a couple of
days, but he Insisted that he could
So here, my friend, you have the
whole case. I consider myself bound
by my word of honor to you. Debts
of honor are debts of honor, but I beg
of you to release me from my word
of honor merely for eight days.
I am convinced that Herr Pollman's
position Is such that postponement of
the repayment of my debt to him
would ruin him. He once helped me
in the most unselfish manner when I
was desperately embarrassed, and I
should hate to see him ruined for my
It will make no difference to you If
you don't get the money for another
week, so I leave the decision to you.
If you consent to release me from my
word, please give the money to Herr
Pollman. Sincerely yours, K.
t # # *
Dear Friend—l have Just given Herr
Pollman the money, but the decision
was not quite as simple as you think.
When I told Fifl last night that I
would buy her the diamonds today she
was overjoyed, and begged me to go
with her to the Jeweler. In vain I told
her that I had no money yet. She said:
"If you know for certain that you
will have the money tomorrow, you
may Just as well buy the diamonds to
night. The Jeweler will let you have
them on your word of honor. There
fore, when you tell me that you can't
buy them tonight it is because you are
not sure you will have money to.
I told her that when she .had waited
so long for the diamonds one day more
Or less would make no difference. She
refused to listen, and at last gave me
the choice between losing her or buy
ing the diamond necklace right away.
I had really no reason not to give
In. I knew you would send me the
money today, so I bought the dia
monds and gave the Jeweler my writ
ten word of honor to pay him today.
About half an hour before Herr
Pollmann came I was informed that
Fin had run away with Baron Z. The
reason she would not wait was be
cause he had arranged to run away
last night and wanted to have this
souvenir of me along.
ANOTHER DEBT OF HONOR
The news would not have killed me,
though it was a hard knock, and I
was disgusted with her behavior. Then
came Herr Follman with your letter,
and my first thought took possession
of me again and became a firm re
Should Herr Pollman be ruined be
cause I had been foolish enough to
buy diamonds for a heartless flirt of
a chorus girl? No. The thought of
being to blame for the ruin of a man
such as he appears to be would haunt
me all my life.
I am going to sacrifice myself, but
do not imagine that I do it for your
sake. I kill myself because I am too
thoroughly disgusted with every
Simultaneously with this letter I
have sent one to Heinrich Fliedel
mann Jr., in which I inform him that
owing to my death I am prevented
from paying him today, but that I
have transferred my obligation to you
to settle within eight days.
This releases you from your word
of honor for a week, dear friend. I
am convinced that you will keep It
as faithfully aa If I were still alive.
Tour sincere comrade, X.
Electric rat traps are in use In
Amsterdam. They are connected by a
wire with a supply of electricity. The
place where the bait rests is the only
part of the trap which is a conductor,
and the moment the rat touches this a
shock closes his career.
The Police Dog Has a Reversible Name
Copyright. 1913, International Newi Service.
Not Used to It
The Rev. Theophllus Hourspeaker
was to preach a special sermon on
"Deceit in Christianity," and a large
congregation had assembled by the
time the church bells ceased ringing;
but from some cause or another the
organist had not put in an appear
ance. The minister, with an anxious
look on his face, stepped forward:
"I am sorry to say," he announced,
"that Mr. Atkins, the organist, has
unforunately failed to arrive, I
shall, therefore, be obliged to appeal
to you for a temporary deputy. Is
there anyone here who can play an
organ that will kindly volunteer to
act as a substitute?"
A shabbily dressed man arose and
walked down the aisle. The minister
I price—everything is in favor of J
A Little New Year Eve Diversion
Copyright, 1913, International New» Service.
Just "Pipe The Blushes, That's All
, i.RrSlitere<J I niti-d States Patent Office)
cordially thanked him, and, after es
corting him to the organ stool and
placing the music before him, re
turned to the pulpit.
The volunteer, however, after fum
bling confusedly about for- a minuto
or two, silently beckoned to the
amazed minister to approach.
"I can't understand this Organ," he
said, with a puzzled look on his face.
"What's the matter with It?"
"Matter with it:" said the surprised
clergyman. "My dear sir, it was only
tuned last week!" »
"Nay, it's not that." came the reply.
"The fact is, this organ's different
to the one I've bin used to. I can't
sea the handle!"
To clear beetles out of cupboards
and larders sprinkle a little benzine
, over the boards, and it will kill the
i eggs as well as the insects.
I One of Quggenheims f.
"There's nothing like putting the
best foot foremost—putting the best
face on the matter," said Oswald Gar
rison Villard in a recent Baltimore
"Why shouldn't we all emulate Mrs.
Sudden Ryches, whose father was a
"Lord Lacland said to Mrs. Sudden
Ryches at a luncheon at Sherry's:
" "Vhat business is your father in,
" 'She flushed slightly, sipped her
amber colored Chateau Yquem, looked
Lord Lacland straight in the eye, and
"And Lord Lacland, remembering
the pale palaces of the copper million-
Hires overlooking the park, said 'Ah"
very sagely, and was very much im