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F. W. KELLOGG, President and Publisher JOHN D. SPRECKELS, Vice President and Treasurer Decidedly "Happy New Year" for San Francisco The Government Will Recognize Us, the Canal Will Benefit Us, and the Rain Will Prosper Us Tonight, when San Francisco shouts its adieus to the old year 1913, it will be waving farewell to a year which kept the state going in good form; when it greets little 1914 it will welcome a year which, as it is to carry on 1913's legacies, promises big. 1914 will establish officially and formally the financial emi nence of San Francisco, with the establishment here of a regional bank. Since the new currency law was passed earlier in the month, providing for ten regional banks in financial centers of the country, there has been no doubt but that San Francisco would have the one instituted on the Pacific coast. Other cities have been clamor ing for the bank; Seattle is to make a hard fight and may secure a bank if two are placed on the western seaboard of the United States. But, as is right, all other cities come after the metropolis of the western slope. The bankers of Los Angeles, realizing the superior claim of San Francisco and rising above petty municipal rivalry, have indorsed the claim of San Francisco for recognition. It is significant of the energy of Los Angeles that the bankers of that city met to support San Francisco on the same afternoon that the bankers of San Francisco assembled for the same but more intimate purpose. As to what effect on business or prosperity the location of a regional bank will have no one yet knows, but the regional bank cities are those places recognized by the government as the natural centers of the regions in which they lie. There should be an at tendant benefit to the cities in which they are placed. San Francisco also has been selected as the place for a branch office of the bureau of foreign and domestic commerce of the United States department of commerce. The object of the bureau is to keep merchants, importers and exporters in close touch with trade conditions and trade possibilities in foreign lands. The es tablishment of this bureau is to be one of the first fruits of the opening of the Panama canal, for Washington realizes as keenly as San Francisco does—or should—that the opening of the canal will mean a new and extended commerce for this port. Those two institutions—the regional bank and the branch office of the commerce bureau—are Washington's promised con tributions for 1914 to the importance of San Francisco. There is also to be the practical opening of the Panama canal to the commerce of the world, the practical completion of the Pan ama-Pacific international exposition, which opens in less than 14 months—on February 20, 1915—and the practical benefits which will come to California and San Francisco from the heavy rains that are now general throughout the state. It looks decidedly like HAPPY NEW YEAR. Said Cuvier to the Devil: "You Can't Eat Me; You're a Vegetarian *_7 Then the Devil Quoted Scripture as He Often Does. Christmas day is gone and is a memory. New Year is almost here. One week of work between holidays and another year begins. Many have wasted this week instead of DOING something. The more fortunate will begin now TO GET THINGS GO ING, realizing that he who does not END the year well can hardly expect to BEGIN the year well. Not what you are GOING to do, beginning tomorrow, but what you do beginning TODAY is what counts. The important thing is to keep your courage, throw oft fear, realize that the real worker is never beaten—and not listen to mournful predictions or disheartened talkers. If you examine a situation closely—as Cuvier examined the devil—you will find that there is always a way out. Cuvier, the great naturalist, was one of the three most learned men that have lived—Aristotle, Bacon and Cuvier make up OUR list. What is your list? Cuvier gave men facts in place of superstition. And the devil, like certain other more or less religious characters, did not like that. He did not want the people educated, because an educated man does not believe in the devil—and not to be believed hurts the devil's feelings and his profits. One wild, stormy night Cuvier was putting the finishing touches to his great work, "Regne animal distribue d'apres son organisa tion." There came three claps of thunder, a strong smell of sul phur, a dismal clanking of chains and the devil stood beside Cuvier, at his desk. Each looked at the other. Cuvier said to himself: "Here's something not catalogued in my book." The devil in a deep voice said: "I'm going to eat you." YOU might have been frightened in Cuvier's place. WE might have been frightened. But Cuvier was calm, for he could tell the nature of an animal at a glance. It was he who first told the world how to reconstruct an entire extinct monster from a small piece of fossil bone. He looked at the devil's head with horns on it. He looked at the devil's feet with hoofs on them. He laughed at the devil and said: "Horns! Hoofs! You be long among the graminivorous mammalia, or, to make my words fit your devilish ignorance, you're a vegetarian. You can't eat me." Not a bad reply. The devil, as usual, quoted Scripture, saying: "All flesh is grass—l can eat you, even if I am a vegetarian." But he had lost heart, and mumbling something about not being able to swallow all the nonsense in Cuvier's head, he went back to tell the folks in hell that he did not know what the world was coming to. The devil did not get Cuvier that night. The great scientist, honored by Napoleon, lived to be made a peer of France under the Bourbons and died a happy, honored, glorious old man in 1832, having lived to see the French revolution, the steam railroad train and the steamboat. Those who took the devil's view, that it is bad to teach the people too much, said and preached that the devil DID get Cuvier after Cuvier died—but many doubt it. Look at your troubles calmly, fearlessly, intelligently, as old Cuvier looked at the devil, and you will not be so badly frightened. The hard times or hard luck that threatens to "eat you" often turns out to be a vegetarian unable to eat anybody. Do your work, keep at it. Make what you can, save part, help others in a big or little way, finish THIS year well. Begin next year courageously and with self-control. All the devils of hard times, hard luck and high cost of living won't get you. You'll be able to say, as Cuvier said: "You can't eat me.'' THE SAN FRANCISCO CALL AND POST Ship ahoy! California has a seagoing railroad commission. * # # Last week we all lived on turkey hash. This week it is corn beef hash. * # * England doesn't want a military fort at the Panama canal. Please, O king, may w« have a piano forte there to play when the British ships go through? * • * At a cosmopolitan college gathering in lowa college yells were given in 20 languages. We thought there was only one language in which they were yelled—the language of "Oski Wow Wow." * * * The tango has been denounced as one of the "greatest moral dissol vents of France." Paris, for instance, was so good before the tango was discovered. i * * * The "bottle king" has decided to build a mansion in Washington that will be an enlarged replica of the White House. But the "bottle king's" place will have this advantage—it will be permanent, nonrefillable at the end of four years. "Miss Brown told me that you paid her such a charming compliment the other evening," said Mrs. Coddington to her husband, "something about her being pretty. The poor girl was so pleased. I don't see how you men can be so untruthful." "I should think you'd know by this time that I'm never untruthful," said Mr. Coddington, reproachfully. "I said she was just as pretty as she could be, and so she was." # * * "Tou naughty, cruel boy." said the very fashionably dressed young woman, who was taking a stroll in the park, to the urchin whom she found despoiling a bird's nest. "How can you be so heartless as to take those eggs? Think of the poor mother bird when she comes back and—" "That's all right, miss," interrupted, INDOOR SPORTS-THE RESOLUTION Evening Calls Footnotes of Humor the boy; "the mother bird is dead." The young woman's expression re flected disbelief. "How do you know?" she asked sharply. " 'Cos I sees 'er on your 'at," was the reply. * * # Old Fraud — "And after floating about on the spar for three whole days, I was finally washed ashore, sir." Gent (unimpressed)—"Ah, and It wouldn't hurt you to be washed ashore again, either." * * ♦ In spite of his well known poor marksmanship, a certain Englishman was invited to the country for a day's shooting. The attendant in great distress witnessed miss after miss. "Dear me," at last exclaimed the tSEAT IT!" Turkey is to buy a Brazil dreadnaught. Wouldn't a little adhesive plaster better repair its map? * * ■» Attorneys for a bankrupt estate in New York received a fee of $52,000. Was the bankruptcy before or after the lawyers arrived? * * * A man in Indiana has worn the same pair of shoes for 36 years. They must have been made to, as well as on a, last * # # They are to have turkeys on exhibition at the poultry show. How can that be, at this time of the year? * * * An eastern poultry fancier is making chickens grow faster under electric light. That's the light they usually flourish under. * * # The American battleships are to be painted a sable color. Here's where we copyright a phrase: "The American black faced troupe." * # * Maybe you can buy cheaper clothes on the upper floors of a building, but the altitude of a lawyer's office has no diminishing effect on the fees he charges- sportsman, "but the birds seem ex ceptionally strong on the wing this year!" "Not all of 'em, sir," came the re mark. You've shot at the same bird this last dozen times. 'El following you about, sir." "Why?" asked the sportsman. "I dunno, sir, I'm sure," replied the man, "unless 'c's 'anqing round for safety." * # # Are we to hold ragtime revues and other hustling forms of entertain ment responsible for the following tragedy? A music hall artist who used to tour the provinces with a flock of performing ducks found managers no longer willing to book his sedate show. After he had been resting for some time he received a telegram asking him to open on the following Monday at a variety theater In the north of England. In reply he wired: "Regret can not come. Have eaten the act." * # * An army chaplain came across a baggage column with a wagon stuck fast. "Men. I see you are in difficulties." he said. "Can I be of any assistance?" "Yes, sir," exclaimed one of the drivers, "by making yourself scarce. You see, we can't very well say to the horses what they'd understand while you're about!" # ♦ * Doctor—"l hope you are following my instructions carefully Sandy—the pills three times a day, and a drop of whisky at bedtime." Sandy—"Weel, sir, I may be a wee bit behind wi' the pills, but I'm aboot six weeks In front wi' the whusky." DECEMBER 31, 19T3 MYSTERIES OF SCIENCE AND NATURE Question Again Arises Whether the Pithecan thropus of Java Was a Man or a Monkey, or a Being Interme diate Between Them GARRETT P. SERVISS THE problem of the famous ape man of Java, the "pith ecanthropus c rectus," is again under discussion by the paleonthologists (students of an cient life), and they stiil are un able to agree whether this mys terious creature was a kind of primitive human being or only an extraordinary specimen of the ape tribe who happened to be born with a big head. A French writer has put the actual situation among the learn ed men in a few words: "For some the pithecanthropus is a man; for others he is a monkey; for others still he is an animal imtermedi.ary between man and monkey." The average reader may say to himself that he doesn't care what the pithecanthropus was. Bother the pithecanthropus! But that would be a very unintelligent at titude to assume. We have ar rived at a period of intellectual development when what is called prehistory has as great (if not greater) importance for us as history itself. The Pithecanthropus, if in Ancestral Line, Is Interesting If the pithecanthropus really belongs in our ancestral line ha is as interesting a figure as the remote past contains. We see him, with his big bushy head, his crooked legs, his bent back, his long arms, away back there close to the point where the paths divided which led in one • • • direction to the cities of men and the wonders of the mind, and in the other direction to the tropical forests and the haunts of climbing creatures to whom nature gave, as in mockery, hu man masks hiding only brute brains. He stands there the most an cient, the most distant, of the creatures which felt the impulse of awakening humanity. He is almost at the bottom of the long hill. He is striking into the nar row path which leads continual ly upward. Around him are other beings to whom the same opportunity came, who were led to the beginning of the same straight, mounting way, but who turned aside, leaving him to pur sue alone his pilgrimage. It is a curious and significant fact that after the discovery of the remains of the pithecan thropus in 1892 an anthropolo gist undertook to reconstruct, upon anatomical principles, the missing jaw (for nothing of the head was found except the top of the skull and a few scattered teeth), and several years later WHEN MOTHER WEEPS HARRY BAKER THE earth seems sad, the skies are gray When Mother weeps. Her tears, they blind the light of day, The sun has not one beaming ray _ When Mother weeps. When Mother weeps I feel sad, too. When Mother weeps All things are wrong; spoiled is the view And everything about looks blue When Mother weeps. A Mother's tears—how much they-mean! When Mother weeps My heart is touched, no joy I glean. Each boy must feel the same, I ween, When Mother weeps. As each tear falls all joy is slain When Mother weeps. Those tears that fall like dewy rain— For peeling onions causes painl So Mother weeps 1 Curious Facts When a Siamese girl attains the age of 35 without marrying she is la beled and placed in a privileged class under the special care of the king, who binds himself to find a husband for her. His method is delightfully simple. A prisoner in any one of the Siamese Jails may gain his pardon and release by marrying one of the mature maidens. Whether he is al ready married or not Is of no great consequence, for in Slam a man is not restricted to one wife. The largest estate in tho United Kingdom is that belonging to the duke of Sutherland, which extends to 759.200 acres. Henry Ellonsky. a well known American long distance swimmer, has Just succeeded in swimming from Brooklyn bridge to Bay Ridge, a dis- j there was discovered at Mauer, in Germany, a human jaw pre cisely corresponding with that which the anthropologist had at tributed to the pithecanthropus. To which must be added the fact that the best authorities assign to "the man of Mauer" an antiquity corresponding with that which has generally been assigned to the pithecanthropus. At the same time there are authorities who deny to the pithecanthropus a place in the line of human descent. Among these is Professor Boule of Paris, who thinks it probable that the pithecanthropus was a species of giant monkey, allied to the gibbons, and superior to its congeners not only in stature but also in size of skull, in which it approaches the lower limit for man. There may have been a group of these overgrown gibbons de veloped in Java, thinks Professor Boule, and they may have been driven into extinction by virtue of the very fact that they were not physically developed in ac cord with their environment. Professor Boule himself ad mits that there are resemblances to the human type in the pithe canthropus, and that its skull seems to have been intermedi ate in form between that of the monkey and that of man. but he denies that such resemblances and correspondences necessarily proves a real ancestral relation ship. But even if this view of the Paris anthropologist be admitted as probably correct it hardly at all diminishes the interest of pithecanthropus, because it only reveals in that creature a being which certainly made a start to ward human evolution, though it may never hare Taifiy entered upon the path. Type Serves to Show How Difficult Was the Development It serves to show how difficult was th* work of developing man out of a lower animal type. Na ture had. apparently, to try again and again, with that patience and that contempt of expense which she always exhibits, and at last she succeeded. So, whether the pithecanthro pus was a primitive man, carry ing locked up in him all the won derful possibilities of evolution which that state of being would imply, or whether he was only an aspiring ape who could not make good his hold on a higher level of existence, we must read about him and the controversies he cites with equal interest tance of about four miles, with hands and feet tied, towing a boat in which were seven men. The total weight of the boat and its occupants was 1,363 pounds. The swimmer was three houra and ten minutes In the water. Five years ago a bachelors' club was founded in Severance, Colo., with 20 members, but the club has Just been disbanded, owing to the fact that all the members are, or are about to be married, and, according to the rules, are no longer eligible for mem bership. Three-tenths of the earnings of a Belgian convict are given to him on the expiration of his term of Impris onment. According to the most expert stat isticians the Atlantic ocean has an are* of 24,536,000 square miles.