Newspaper Page Text
IR COUNTY NfeWS
Rules That Will Help an Amateur t
Read the Riddles.
Writing: In cipher, where letters or
figures or characters, grotesque or oth
erwise, are used to form the -words,
"While it may look formidable to the
uninitiated Is really not difficult to
solve if one will tackle it with care
The proper way to set ahout reading
fcn unknown cipher is to find the letter
or figure that occurs oftenest This Ih
sure to be "e." as "e" is by far the com
monest letter in the language. The
second commonest is "t," and if you
find a three letter or three figure batch j
often of which the last is "e" and the
first "t" the middle letter or figure is
sure to stand for "h." Any letter or
figure standing alone must, on clear
reasoning, be "I" or "o" or "a."
The second commonest three letter
word in a message of any length. Is
sure to be "and." which gives you three
more letters for addition to the alpha
bet Remembering that the commonest
doubles are "ee," "oo" and "ff" (in the
order given) and the commonest two'
letter words are "he," "by," "or," "as,"
"at" and "an" (in the order given), n
person should be able to solve almost
any cipher message.
FORCED HIM TO SING.
An Occasion When Abell Made Up Hie
Mind In a Hurry.
It is probable that on no occasion has
any other musician had to practice hla
art under more disagreeable circum
stances than that in which Abell, a
singer of the seventeenth century, once
It appears that while Abell was ram
bling through Poland he was sent for
to go to court, and after evading the
request by excuses for a short time he
was commanded to attend. At the
palace Abell was placed in a chair in
the center of a spacious hall and sud
denly drawn up to a great height. The
king, with his attendants, appeared in
a gallery opposite him as he sat thun
derstruck in his suspended chair.t At
the same instant 'several bears enter
ed the hall with their keepers.
As the singer gazed in horror at
these ferocious creatures the king
calmly inquired whether he preferred
to slug or be let down among the
bears. The singers choice, or course. 'Again, the soil pas-dug through the
was quickly made, and he afterward ' bodies of worm i? excreted in a finer
declared that in spite of his terror he j condition, beins grouud by attrition
never sang better in his life, although j through the intestines. Darwin esti
he admitted he might have introduced mated that no fewer than iifteen tons
a few more -'shakos" than usual in I Qf soil nnminllv na;s ihronerh the bod-
his songs. New York Press.
The kind of mirage known as fata
morgana Ls seen across straits or lakes
., 'n .southern Iluropc and shows in calm
weather such images in the air as those
of towns, castles and palaces. On the j
Lake of Geneva it is sometimes seen ,
on fine afternoons of spring or sum
mer. F. A. Forel, the well known
Swiss Investigator, has been giving j
some attention to the curious apparl- j
tlons and concludes that they are due J
to a KctilIar distribution of tempera- j
(ure in the air over the water. In the '
morning, the air being cooler than the i
lake, the opposije bank seems to be (
depressed, .exaggerating the earth's ro- ,
tundity. and late in the afternoon, the !
alr having become hotter than the wa- .
ter's surface, the opposite bank ap- j
pareutly rises above the true horizon !
and tne eii.h circumfereiice is en
larged. For a few moments only, at
the change from one condition to the
other, the fata morgana may be seen.
Why He Had to Have an Office.
An inherited fortune and the dis
posal of an organized business enabled
a well known Chicagoan to retire. Fie
had the inclination for leisure, but
could not surrcid"r the idea of having
a definite business abiding spot lie
rented an olDce In a lofty building and
went to Europe. After a six months'
absence he rr-turned. looked the build
Ing over and went to South America
Then after again verifying the report
that the building was not crumbling,
be took a jaunt to Japan. Not long
ago one of his old cronies said:
"Frank, why don't you give up your
office? You don't need It"
"That's true." sa.d Frank "I would
give it up. but I don't know what to
do with the rug." -Chicago Post
News About Two Great Men.
Even Franklin himself would be sur
prised nt the following information
gathered, from a frashman's essay:
"Franklin's education was got by
himself He worked himself up to ho
n great literal man He was also able
to invent electricity Franklin's father
was a tallow chandelier"
This f j! lowed:
"Sir Walter Raleigh was put out once
when his servant found him with firo
In his bead And one day after there
had been a lot of rain, he threw his
cloak In a puddle and the queen step
ped dryly over "Everybody's.
Mistress Nora. I saw a policeman in
the park today kiss a baby. I hope you
will remember my objections to such
things. 'Nora Sure, ma'am, no police
man would ever think of kissin yer
baby when I'm around. Louisville
HHeMother always carves when
K-e have compauy to dinner. Bobby
Isn't your fathor able to? Willie
Guess be ain't able to without sayin'
Jrtngs. Boston Transcript
Don't" express a positive opinion un
less yon perfectly understand what
yon are talking about.
A FRIEND OF THE FAMILY.
It Was Highly Prized as a Wonderful
When Miss Ann Pickett dropped In
on her neighbor, Mrs. Splcer, and
found her moping over the fragments
of a gilt vase Miss Ann sympathized
generously. "It must have been rath-
er a costly vase," she said, looking ad -
mlrlngly at the pieces.
"No, It only cost six bits," Mrs. Spl-
cer acknowledged. "'Tain't that I
feel so bad about."
"Maybe It was a ift that you prized
because of associations?"
Mrs. Splcer shook hir head. "Jim
and I bought it over In ""jpkinsvllle
a long time ago. 1 prized it because
It was such a .siiYintr to thf fnmtlv
The first year we had it I kept it on "What's all that noise about?" abKeu a Sy naireu ran wnne discuss- 01 ms seai as a specimen caiieo. jitsu-
the front shelf for a general ornament The boatswain answered: . luK diamond doings of long ago. "There ln to have it registered and kept in a
Then when Jim's birthday came and I , "My lord, the loblolly boy's set fire t uld be plenty of business for the , government office (district ofiice of a
hadn't anything else handy to give I .' tp an empty bottle and if set fire to bone setters and so many errors In the city J0 Tillage) that it may rep
gave him the vase for his own. Next the ship." fieJ(1 thnt the sport would develop into . r A', ?mniJ5S t u-
Christmas instead of paying out good , 'Oh!" said Nelson. "That's all. is it? a burlesque. Yet 1 can remember the JSXJ
money to buy something new. he gave , I thought the enemy had boarded us ; dnys wuen balI , nevcr wore d wld Slp ete mi
It back to me for a Christmas present and taken us all prisoners. You ana ' , otl1 , , . , , ,.,, ' 7, sl,ones' s0"' S!'Ter etc. xnose
Then I ,v,. it to .ltm innior n hi ! ioblollr m,mr imr it ,,r .,.! tt M ! filoves and wnen 'hers ad neither mostly in use at the present day are of
birthday, and he gave it to Sue Belle
. . , . . . . . ..
'The next spring all the kinfolks got
up a birthday party for old Aunt Sal-
lie Spicer. and we took her the rase,
After she'd kep' it a good bit she gave
it to Jim's sister Jane for a weddln'
present, and afterward Jane gave It
to me and Jim when we had our china
weddln'. 1 was countin' on givln' It
to Jim again on his next birthday, and
now here It is smashed to flinders.
"I tell you. Miss Ann. it most makes
me cry to think of losing such a useful
family article so near Jim's birthday
tool" Youth's Companion.
WORK OF EARTHWORMS.
These Humble Burrowars Ar Graat
Aids to the Farmer. ,
The humble earthworm is one of
man's best friends. The farmer and
the gardener could not spare him. Dr.
J. Newton Friend tells about him in
Splonro Prnnvco IVrrwri Tin ItVIonrt'o
observations It appears that worms
aerate the soil in a variety of ways.
In burrowing through the soil the
worms render it more porous and per
meable to gases, not merely by virtue
of the air spaces formed, but by rea
son of the fact that the soil is thus
continually kept in gentle motion.
ies of worms for every acre.
Further, worms breathe In oxygen
and exhale carbon dioxide, and the lat
ter gas. as is well known, readily dis
solves in water, forming an acid solu
tion which will render alkaline earths
and metallic oxide-, -iron soluble.
Worms materially aid in producing
soluble salts of iron in the 5oil when
other agencies e' g.. dilute mineral
acids fail. The iron is eventually glv-
Pn i,.,Pi- tn tho soil in a moro soluble
condition and presumably in one which
can be directly absorbed by plant
An vory Mat.
junv people have never even heard
or SUcij a thiug. and it is not to be
wondered at, for jhoe mat.s are ex-
ceedingly rare, and it is said by those
Who know that only three of tuee
beautiful curiosities exist in the whole
wtrldf The one we now write about is
the largest one made. It measures 8
by 4 feet and. though made in a small
hill state in the north of India, has an
almost Greek design for Its border. It
was only used on state occasions, when
the rajah sat on it to sign important
documents The original cost of the
mat is fabulous, for G.-100 pounds of
ivory were used In its manufacture.
The finest strips of ivory must have
been taken off the tusks, as the mat is
as iiexiblo as a woven stuff and bean
tifully fine. London Graphic
Coaling the Sun.
Coaling the sun is an expression used
by physicists to indicate the necessity
of renewing the stock of motive power,
exactly analogous to coaling a vessel
for an ocean journey. Many maintain
that this is done by the incessant show
ers of meteorites which rain in upon it
from celestial space. Thus it is that
f the sun's energy is continually kept up
j and its fires are fed. Atom after atom
in the continuous collisions of matter
is changed into vapor and adds its
in the continuous collisions of matter
quota of energy to the great central .
storehouse-in fact, "coals the sun."- !
"Thomas," said the mother severely,
"some one lias taken a big piece of
gingerbread out of the pantry."
Tommy blushed guiltily.
"Oh. Thomas." she exclaimed. "I
didn't think it was in you."
"It ain't all." replied Tommy. '.'Part
of it's in Elsie.' National Monthly.
Class Distinctibn. ! "I don't know." replied Senator Sor
"Did ye see as Jim got ten years' ' ghum. "There's so much sleuthing go
penal for stealing that 'oss?" Ing on that a man gets shy of a thumb
"Serve 'im right too. Why didn't ! print, a footprint and even of leave to
'e buy the 'oss and not pay for 'im like
any other gentleman." London Sketch.
The Best Way. j
Choose always the way that seems I
the best however rough It may be. j
Custom will soon render it easy and
The Mental Railroad.
Patlenf--I cennet concentrate, doc
tor. My train of thought keens lump
Ing the track. Doctor Ah, a nervous I
wreck! Puck. j Judge.
The absent are like children helpless : Novelty is the great-parent .of pleas
o defend themselves. Rcade. r re. South.
A Dangerous Fire Aboard His Ship
Didn't Excite the Admirali
Two or three days licfore the battle
of Trafalgar a boy on the Victory care
lessly set fire to a bottle of ether. The
result was that the flames extended to
some sails and also to a part of the
' ship. There w;is a general confusion
running with buckets and what not '
and. to make matters worse, the tiro
vras becoming dangerous, as it was '
rapidly extending to the powder maga-
During the hubbub Lord Nelson was !
in the chief cabin writing dispatches, i
His lordship heard the noise he could
not do otherwise and so lu a loud I
i voice he called out:
. ... .
i "we re not blown up. But prav make
! an little noise alwut it as you can or 1
can't go on with my dispatches." And
"with these words Nelson went to his
desk and continued his writing with
the greatest coolness,
THE PARIS OF PERSIA.
Teheran Is One of the Dream Cities of
According to a Persian proverb, "Is
piihan is beautiful, Shlraz is lovely, but
Teheran is most beautiful of all." The
Pershtus call Teheran the "Paris of
Persia." This city lies on a sandy lev
el. There are gentle hills to tbo north,
and far in the distance one ruav see a
l-Miii'i. of ninnnlnina nrnn-niul 1- o ,n-
lestie and snow envoreil nnnt
The features of Teheran that- attract
. - ,
the traveler's attention first nro its cltv
walls and its hundred towers that stand
at intervals in the wide circle of the
ramparts. In the center of the town i
Mio -rrnnh sonnro of tVio nreonnl trlioro
an enormous number of now obsolete
arms are stored. The great Boulevard
--"". - - "' ". ,w - -..., .. v- v
as tne ! rencn
would call it, which is near the arsenal,
is one of the lincst to be found outside
If this part of the town has a modern
aspe t the southern part of the city has
retained its oriental character, and here
palaces, bazaars and mosques jostle
one another, surrounded by narrow,
wfndl'iir. mysterious streets. Teheran
is one of the dream cities of the east.-
London Family Herald.
Not onlv stationerv oflice ollicials. but
cabinet ministers, used formerly to en-
joy sundry little perquisites now 'o
longer legitimate. At one time. : -r
instance, each secretary of state re-
celved ou his appointment a silver ir c-
stand wtuon lie could retain ami in i
down as a keepsake to his children,
but Mr. Gladstone when chancellor of
the exchequer abolished this little per
quisite, and the only token of oflice an
outgoing minister can take with him
is his dispatch box. The wife of a
minister who had long occupied an of
ficial residence on being evicted said
with a pensive sigh. "I hope I am not
avaricious, but I must sav when one
was hanging up pictures it was very
pleasant to have Hie board of works
carpenter aud a bag of nails 'for noth- '
ing." London Chronicle.
Not the Same.
It was in the smoking car. and the
two fat men were talking.
Avit t lmvo n "onri iionl of rronhlft
s " -aid the first '
get 'em just right '
with my kidney
Can t seem to get em ju
How about you?"
"Oh my kidnevs are generally all
rightit's liver with me." said the sec-'
ond. "Been running wrong all sea- I
' "Excuse mo for butting in." said the
drummer for n patent medicine house. ,
"but if you gentlemen will take Peter- '
kin's Pepper Pellets For Peevish Pa- ;
tieuts thev will relieve vou Instantly." I
"What's that got to do with us?" abk-
ed the fat men simultaneously. "Wo I
ain't sick; we're retail butcbers."-Har-
1 ' j
Meridians Run Due North and South. I
A man "following the absolute lino
of the tenth meridian east from the j
north to the south pole" would travel !
due south and never southeast or
southwest so long as he remained on
due south and never southeast or i
the meridian upon which he started, j
If on the tenth meridian east, for in- j
j stance, his angular distance from the
I meridian of Greenwich does not
. change. He is always 10 degrees cast
i of that meridian from one pole to the
: other He could only travel southeast
or southwest by departing from that I
meridian on one side or the other.
New York American.
"Don't you want tp leave 'any foot
prints In the sands of time?"
print" Washington Star.
Josie I was taken for twenty-five to-
day, and lam only eighteen. Julia
What will you be takeu for when you
Josie For better or
worse, I hope.
He If I should propose to you what
would be the outcome? She That
vrould, depend largely upon the Income.
The Game In the Days When It
Was Played With Bare Hands.
a legal person or a corporation. The
MASKS WERE NOT USED THEN. seals ot the emperor are distinguished
as privy and state seals. They are
each three inches square.
As a Result Fractured Noses. Split The state seal is used mostly upon
Palms and Broken Fingers Were documents relating to foreign coun
Everyday Incidents The Advent and tries. The privy seals are stamped on
Development of Protective Devices. imperial rescripts, issued for proclama
tions at home.
"Can you Imagine a modern baseball Japanese law requires that each in
team playing the game barehanded?" dividual should send in an impression
fnnclre nnr mtfta It- rnrtuJrn rrfrtot
-...vuw UV. .U.VW - IVMUU -V ..14.
courage to face a swift pitcher and lots
of nerve to get in front of a hot
" m, f ,.,. i .
Many of our citizens who played
baseball more than thlrty-five years
ago will tell you that broken fingers,
t bone bruises, split palms and torn fin-
, ger nails were everyday accidents and
mat a piayer who showed the white
feather was tabooed. Before gloves
and masks were invented catchers had
endless troubles. The old timers who
dared to stand close behind the bats
men hnd rPPt.ll ImnoL-nrt out mT tmcio
fractured by the foul tips that could
not be avoided. Soon came a habit of
nutting a nil of solid rnhw in ti.
month mnrt in cnxh n mnr,n H,l 1
covered the li s .ind nrovhlPd nrnton.
I tion for the teth. Ir nmnvi offl-
. , . . .
I dent that nil the Ipmlino. tnl,pro
' adopted it. i?ut even then It was dan-
' gerons to .-.uch close up until James
' Tyng, rln- former Harvard player, in-
' ventPil r!i.. m-il-- n nmheo,.. orpt-l
- -wv vwtikrv.i 0Jit aUutl
j with bi...-,d strips of flattened iron that
covered the face, but also partially ob-
scureu the backstop's vision. .
, Then came the catcher's gloves, one!
t for each band. These gloves were of
; light kid, with no Gngers and little or
no padding. Catchers who haudied .
, swift deliveries, therefore, soon found
' that the gloves did not come up to the
requirements, so it was a common :
' thing to see backstops stuffing grass'
into the gloves to protect the palms of '
J One of the first Natioual league
catchers to use a left. Imnd "tnvo with
flllErers was Movers of Infliniumnlle
more than twentv-five vears niro
t Somebody made a glove for him that
cil-useU a general laugh. The fingers
were so long and the surface of the i
glove was so broad that Meyers found
It difficult at first to hold ti pitched ,
ball. Lie was catching the great lien-
ry Boyle In those days, and Uoyle had
blindiug speed. Meyers had broken i
all of his Qngers. also both thumbs, in '.
handling IJoyle with the lingeries ;
gloves, so that he readily tried the
new one. and
after much perseverance '
at it had merit. After I
he proved that it had merit. After t
that all the catchers adopted a linger .
' glove for the loft hand. The glove was .
.improved upon when the manufactur-!
er put solid leather tips on the ends of
i fair, but made it impossible to injure
tne ungers or tne leir. uanu.
manufacturers gradually increased the !
sIze J1D(1 "'eight of the catcher's mitt
the mania tor gloves became general.
xne in ana ,,c "eiuers auopieu mem.
0,ne ,,sim? tbe min unt11 tho baseball
ra,e "inkers were forced to legislate
ngainst the practice.
Wllen tue ru,e stipulating the size of
lne S10 to be worn as Pass(-'u t,ie
catcher was allowed to wear the same
nvy mitt, while a lighter one was
assigned to the- first baseman. But
a tlie other fielders were compelled
t0 use fin-er "Iove weighing not
more than na,f a duz,, ""Ps. Betore
tbe in antl out fiellers began to wear
gloves, however, many stars made re,'
"arknble records. Adrian C. Anson
I.. .l f i i f .. Si i. T X" .
P'.veu ui.si oase ior me i uiramm ivi
n,anr -vears barehanded The old man
Xvas a Q,ark for sl1CD swift tarow
iuS miieiders as h.d Williamson ami
Fred Pfeffer. who tried in vain to
maKe " wince. -"a".v nulps Anson
wnt: home from the ball field with
swollen flnj-ers and very painful bone
bruises, bnl never used a mitt or a
glove until near tho end of his dia
With the popularity of the giove
came an improved style of mask The
wires were made smaller and strongei
with the padding firmer I-ater on the
mask had a visor of leather to keep
the sun out of the catcher's eyes', to
gether with a steel protection for the
neck and throat The client protector
came into use in the eiglities. nut at
first it was r.ot inflated. It was a flat
affair with a bamboo frame over which
was a buckskin covering. This did
not prevent catchers from being par
tially knocked out by sharp font tips
n the bread basket, so the pneumatic
shest protector was hailed with de
light and is now indispensable
Roger Bronahan was the first major
league catcher to wear shin guards
men as cricketers use He was ridi
culed at first, but when a special make
was put on the market Roger was vin
dicated The guards now worn by
many backstops have a joint at tho
knees so that they do not impede
catchers In their hurry after fonl flies
The guards are adjusted quickly and
prevent many serious Injuries. New
the fingers to protect the nails. i " - """l"lu" ""'' l'"- ' Philadelphia that night sizzled, am! tlu
Buck Kwiug, Silver Flint and Char- : senoral. v.-ho placed complete reliance , phadelp,lhl vor the Ilext mimtisitz
ley uennett. tnree or tne greatest " ----" -j-"-" ..- , ,.v. ; on tll(. front e i,., w tlie
backstops the game ever produced. """1 -"'- "tvi .."...1L.i.i.. ui. ; -orUl how profanely indiirorooc to the
were among the first to adopt the mitt. . -,"1 v ' Vli'1 tho t.iMorj result tliat , rmd.Mplii.i in.nt Gwwnti i:ugl
which was a comparatively light af- ihc governor was successful In supply- I It tonl. r.,nham M mii4.t
Ltm SE-m JAPAN
Every Person Must Have One Which
the Government Registers.
Japanese seals (ban) are of wood,
stone or metal, with signs engraved on
the face. They are used in addition to
a signature to represent an individual,
flfnto rnt irvfil -frfti'r rhlnnnorno
0wwF -. v... -. a. ....., .V U..V.v..w.
or buffalo horn, shell, marbles or of
cherry vood or boxwood, and recently
India rubber has come in use.
! Tho.ink used for stamping-Is called
nlkuIt gcnerallr ot vermilion red.
' Tne cheapest kIn(1 of seai8 are made
0f boxwood and sold at 5 cents apiece.
Most seals are oval in shape, but some
j are round and others square. They
rarely exceed one-hnlf inch in diame-
' ter. Oriental Review.
PEROXIDE'S MANY USES.
U ,8 a Valuab,e "Antiseptic and Can Be
I Employed in Other Ways,
I 0ne oC the most powerful bleaching
agCniS employed, VUHOUS TOttieS IS
' Peroxide of hydrogen, also known as '
hydrogen dioxide and oxygenated wa-
Ier- ine " color in ostricn
l)Iumes is removed by it, and It will
. uIso blcach a sreat numbcr r other
J tblDgs' sucb as bones' .ivory' silver'
VOOd, silk, cotton and hair. It Can be
us?d ,to restore tne color tto old oil
PaintinSs which have become darkened j
Peroxide i.s a valuable antiseptic and
will also destroy objectionable micro
organisms in water. It can even be
used. to cure indigestion, but for this
purpose as well n for other medicinal
uses it must be diluted. A drop of
pure peroxide is strong enough to raise
a white blister on the skin.
Minute quantities of peroxide of hy- j
drogen are found In the air, in rain
water and in suow, and it is borne-
times found in the jui-e; of certaiu
! I)lsl- T1G liquid is produced On a
large scale by the action of acids on
I,ei"oxIdL of sodium. The solntion may
be concentrated hy allowing the water,
lu -' " .v i'i"g r. an
throusli it or by evaporation in a va-'
C.UUUJ over slPlric aeid.-Xew York
ml Brother Jonathan
" ""P,n "V f Uf" ..V.l,nuir,,oaa:
inan was as iouows: nen uenerai
Washington went to Massachusetts to '
orgtiuize the army he found 11 great j
lack of a"stion and of other nee- ,
""" " """" ' "-'- ,
" u,eans "it- cumins ot tne
."' '",t ""V."," .1 , , .' '1H . I
"npossibie to anange t.iings piopeil. ,
uiuii ".i tutu femi-niur
Jn? uia-v rf the pressing wants of the j
army, and thenceforth, whenever dif-
ficulUes arose and the army spread
over the country. "We must consult
Brother Jonathan" became a common
saying until it passed into a nickname I
for the whole country. '
A Kinnd.n Par a HBrSS. i
The kiug of England owes his crown
to a horse's shoe The act of settle
ment b3- which in 1701 parliament
elected the house of Hanover to the
British throne, passed the commons
bv onlv one maiorit.v. This deciding
' - I
vote was given by Sir Arthur Owen, j ll,'Hl with-ber namp " t "
M. P. for Pembrokeshire, third of his 1i'v ,,!,v ,or,,1 "'r- '"" abme-or-tltle.
who rode r.ost haste from Wales I a1 "'ay Aud Bo-wie teJ t-MI Bes
for the purpose. He had relays of
fresh horses all along the route, hut
arrived, dusty and travel worn, at
Westminster barolv in time to the vorv 1
minute. Had one of his horses gone ! T,u' t.mrNt wa.- for the rtrt time
lame or cast a shoe he would have ' viewing tho pHuantun oity vt Cofoo
been too late. ! IU11' ,,1 A morion h 'lty of (Jrisiottal sit-
Holland's Flowers. ,
The Dutch are a nation of tlower
lovers, skilled gardeners and inventive
farmers. Ou canal boats, on floating
river houses, around farmhouses, lu
humble village and great city one finds
flowers, flowers, flowers. Some one
has said that Holland's illustrious con
querors have been her, engineers and
her florists, ThrougQ this flower cul
ture has "come her wealth, for this has
been one of her chief Industries.
Like a Miracle.
"The age of miracles has gone," de
clared the cynic.
"No. it hasn't," said the woman. "My
husband told me this morning that be
noticed I was wearing last season's
hat and gave me money to buy a new
one." Baltimore American.
Hadn't Heard of Any Other.
Bjones Don't you think a talkative
woman Is more popular with the men
than any other kind? Henpeckke
What other kind is there? Philadel
phia Record. .
Rubbing It In.
"That girl I've been goin' to see
ain't got no senso of humor."
"Didn't she laugh when you propos
ed?" Houston Post
TERRIFIED THE SHAH.
The Persian Monarch Suddenly Lt
All Interest In Radium.
Radium, most mysterious of the new
mysteries in modern science. Is so lit
tle familiar to unscientific men that
the panic of the oriental potentate de
scribed in a recent book by M. Xavier
Paoll. a French detective, la easily un
derstood. Once while in Paris the shah of
Persia. Muzaffar-ed-din. expressed a
wish to know something of Professor
Curie's famous discovery. M. Paoll
made the necessary arrangements.
Complete darkness is of course needed
if radium is to reveal itself in all its
brilliancy. With endless trouble Paoll
persuaded the monarch to descend Into
one of the hotel cellars that had been
arranged for the purpose.
But at length bis majesty, with all
his suit, proceeded to the underground
apartment. Professor Curie closed the
door, switched off the elcctnc light
and uncovered his specimen ot radium.
Suddenly a shout of terror between' the
roar of u bull and the yell of a man
being murdered rang out and was
echoed by a hundred others.
"Amid general excitement and con
sternation." writes M. Paoll, "we flung
curKPlvp npon the electric switches
and turned on the lights.
"Then we beheld a strange spectacle.
In the midst of the prostrate Persians,
with his arms around the neck ot the
grand vizier and his round pupils di
lated to their very rims, stood the
shah, shouting at the top of his voice
"'Come away! Come away!
"The switching on of the light calm
ed his mad terror as if by magic. Real
izing the disappointment and chagrin
he had caused M. Curie, the shah tried
to compensate him by the offer of a
decoration. But the austere man of
science," couclndes Paoll. "thought nt
to decline it."
NAILED THE WRONG MAN.
The Reporter Didn't Get an Interview,
but Did Get a Story.
Th? late IJepreseutative Hingham o
Philadelphia, who was for many years
the "father ot the house." served In
emigres w'uh Hie tate Genera! Meyer,
who fur yours represented a New Or
leans district m the house. The twi
generals, one u Yankee, the other a
I'onfederate. wore not only good
friends, hut bore a strong resemblance
to om-ii ut'ier. on. h being short, chesty
looKii'g. uaiiiii UICM.CU aim uavmg
j pi,j- i
day the correspondent of a
Philadelphia paper was eal)nl sway
'. from Washington and left a Baltimore
j man to do his work. The substitute
recuired a telegram from Philadelphia
. tt) interview Central Bingham
ihat congress wouM do with a bill.
then pending, vitally afTectine: the Phii
Hurrying through Statuary bull, the
"sub." who wa new to Washington.
I ran int.. Gen. ml Meyer. The Louisl-
.. -., ......... ...... ..., .. ....
' mi.. i.i it-.-uiMH ? .1 MILH; a.UUtUV
, and when abed for an interview about
,ho !..,,,,- mInt eX1,ode4,. Tbo
. ..j do.t arp a abont thc piMa
dolphin mint, t toll yoiil" shouted
oenonll Mojer awl tore bimswft away.
The st(,rv he eorres!Muknt nt to
s,fUOre llMeIr wItU uis eoasiltnmSc3.
-Xew York World.
Two of Thsm.
it:.-, ... ki ...i.v.
" v L
Pitiful earnestly and stored breech-
Ingly into his waxen frntureN Again
CaiQe th nw f t!,P eeM b,!t lh
I uiuc ui mil uiiiitini iififiruw mr;
death. His lips weakly struggled to
j execute his lar couunaiMis. and rht
j friends bout ofoor to hear the ftrflow
I ing whisper: "I am gone? Yy& or I
know Go to Milly. Tell lwr-r i
:.... t,j.. .:n ... i ...
same iidng "- l. union Tle-
The Twin Cities.
ting side U side at tho Atlantic id of
Wnat is it tti cad the American "
city ':" lit- asUod , ilJil
'Cristobal " ' "
That is too bad," said. "It
should bo Colon and Semicolon." St
A Wejk Sejoinder.
"Our landlady was guilty of an no
conscious bit of humor today."
"What was itV"
"One of the boarders asked for a
punch, and she said she never served
tdrong drinks, but she would give him
orae coffee."- Baltimore American.
They're All Doing It
If you boil It down until it is gout!
nd thick you will find that 9S.7 per
ent ot human energy Is dedicated to
tho interesting job of people trying to
got each other's money or chattels.
A Bright Office Boy.
Caster Is the boss In? Oflice Boy
No, sir: he's gone out Caller- Will fct
be back after dinner? Office Boy-
No: that's what he's gone out tor-F
All one's life is music If one tocch.es
Ihe notes aright and la tune.