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THE BOURBON NEWS, PARIS, KENTUCKY, JANUARY 24, 1913.
I f fl Bt fl I sswwmwwwK Job Printing WORK DONE WHEN PROMISED Good Work Done Cheap; Cheap Work Done Good! TRE- J9B R00fflS OF THE News Are prepaired to do the best of Printing on short notice such as BILLHEADS, LETTERHEADS, CARDS, CATALOG . POSTERS, and, in fact, everything that is printed. Orders for Engraving, such as Wedding An nouncements, Invitations, given prompt attention. ' . -"" t f Let us figure with you on on ybur next work Our facilities are the best, having just installed two of the latest im proved Chandler & Price Job Presses come around and see them work. Our type is new and modern faces; Che Bourbon Hews, 1 04 Issues a Year for $2.00. Advertising rates reasonable and made known on application 4 VAuuiuuimmx ONE WITH A FUZZY HAT By GEORGIA HORN. "Land sakes! There he comes again, Susie! Why, you know the one with the fuzzy hat an' the plait in his overcoat. He sure has got his eye on you! Yestid'y when I come up to the table to take his order instead of you he was so upset he ordered rasp berry sundae instead of his usual chocolate soda. An' raspberries out for months! Go on none of us will interfere you wait on him! "Mebbe he's a millionaire. That would be fine for Susie. "Nobody can act more like a lady than she can, only she's got her hair too light. I'm so glad minp is a nachurl blond. Lilly, see that old lady just coming in? The one who looks as though she was go ing to die in a minute or two, and bought her clothes in the remnant basement? Well, you listen to me that's old Mrs. White-Jones, and she has a million relatives waiting to get their hands on her bank account, and she's tough as a nut. Travels all over the world alone at her age and never loosens up a penny. "Y'ought-a seen her nephew in here with her the other day. He helped her out of the electric just as careful as though he was afraid she might accidently sink through the pavement. 'Auntie, dear,' says he, 'try a riffle parfait with nuts you'll like it!' 'Young man,' says she, 'piffle parfaits are 25 cents a piece and as long as I'm paying the bill I guess you'll get along on a ten cent drink! Extrava gance is the curse bf the age!' And then I'll bet she drove downtown and bought a bushel of diamonds. "Two v'nilla sodas and one mint lemonade? Yes'm. No'm; there ain't no strawberries now. Why, I don't' know I expect they get tired growing this time of year. "See that party in the blue suit and feathers? She's mad because I can't pick strawberries off'n the chandelier for her. I'bet it hasn't been very long that she had enough money to come into a swell shop like this here one is. "Yes'm, you ordered chocolate. Beg pardon you said so distinctly. I didn't hear you mention mint lemonade at all. Well, of course I can change it if you say so. "No use trying to please that bunch, ordering chocolate and then claiming it was mint lemonade! Gee, this sort of a job is fierce and wearin' on a girl! "Look there, quick! Just coming in! That's Daisy Duberry, and she draws $800 a week for doing a half hour stunt on the stage! Think of it! She doesn't look so much, but I wish to goodness I knew where she buys her complexion. Isn't it a peach? I'm crazy about that hat she's got on, and I'm going to fix my hair like hers before I'm a day older. "Oh, look at that! Kitty nabbed her! 'Spose she thinks she'll get tickets or something, an I've always waited on Miss Duberry -whenever she's been in! I'm going to tell Kitty what I think of her! Jealous thing! Not that I care for the tip she al ways gives it's just the principle of the thing! "Think you're siriart don't you, Kit? I'll pay you back for jumping jay cus tomers she is, too! Miss Duberry is a p'rticular friend of mine, I'd have you know. "Yes, sir; I was just on my way to wait on that farthest table. Nobody sems to pay attention to the new cus tomers unless it's me. Not that I want to name any names, but there's no use expecting Kitty to wait on any one else; as long a Miss Duberry isJ in here. "Guess that'll hold Kit for awhile. The old man's cross, and he won't do a thin to her. "Two maple sundaes and two hot chocolates? Yes'm. "Get next to my parties in the cor ner, girls. They made their hats at home and they've got on rings enough to light the shop if they were hung up high. What do you make of that? They must be somebody. Nobody but big guns can be so contrarylike. The others don't dare. "What? Hot chocolate? Beg par don, ma'am, I'm vur-ry careful to get my orders correctly, and what you said was two maple sundaes and two chocolate ice cream sodas. Nothing was said about hot chocolate at all. But, of course, we aim to please, and I'll change it for you if you insist! "Gee! I wish women wouldn't change their minds sol They never know what they order! Here, Josie, you take these hot chocolates to those, two vinegar cruets with the awful hats and the rings over there I've got to fix my hair. "It's about time for that young man with the lovely eyes to drop in for his tea. I think he must be English, and sometimes younger sons get to be dukes and things, you know! Where's my vanity case? Well, I like your nerve, Susie! I "Yes, sir, I'm attending to business. I didn't know you objected to a girl's sitting down just a minute when she's worked till she's rea'dy to drop! "I'd like to hit him, I would! Al ways snooping around for fear we're not earning our pay! Gee! The life we are leadin is a hard one for "a girl." Chicago Daily News. Where Her Shoe Were. Dorothy, aged five, was having trouble assembling her clothes on arising. "Why, "where are your shoes, Dorothy?" asked mamma. "I don't know, mummle," the five- year-old gravely replied. ""But I saw them walking around wltbTTMargaret in them last night after -I-had gone to bed." -Indianapolis News." SSourbon Sarage dc Supply Co. AUTOMOBILES Supplies of All Kinds, Repairing, Etc. SSourbon Sararge $ Supply Co. I C. 1 C. M. CLAY.IPresident ED. BURKE, Vice-President JNO. T.i COLLINS, Sec'y-Treas S. K. Nichols, General Manager Bourbon Tobacco Warehouse Co. WV fj GS2I3SS23 2&-ScJ. SALES TUESDAYS, THURS DAYS and SATURDAYS. S We have buyers forlthe American Tobacco Co., thelR.'J. Reynolds Co., Liggett & Myers, the Lorillard Co.. besides various independent and local buyers. We have an abundance of wagon room and free stabling of horses. Bring us your tobacco; wefguarantee you a square deal. J WEi SULIU I YOUK l-W I KOINAOt Bourbon Tobacco Warehouse Company I LFans, Kentucky iHnrainHBaHiflP H BARBER HOP Windsor Hotel. Modern Equipment Polite Service. Everything Sanitary. Children's Work a Specialty. CARL CRAWFORD Special Prices For Beef Hides Until Further Notice We pay 121-2c for green beef flhides. Call us up or tyring if to our place. B Opp. Hotel fc-BW MAX MUNICH, 8th Street, PARI3, KY Call Easb Tenn. Phone 374 X , "jV""" , DIRECTORS C. M. Clay, H. S. Caywood, Jno. T. Collins, R. M. Jacoby, W. C. Dodson, Lee Stephenson, Ed Burke, W. M. Rogers S. K. Nichols Incorporated t iQew Coal yard I Have opened a Coal Yard at the Dow I w Q4 - TT. 1X7.. J Qa- I Rich Mountain Coal I Kentucky Jem Coal I Last longer and furnishes t ajgreater amount l of heat than other coals -I O. R. TURNER, I Windsor Dow Building E. T. Phone 58 I GEO. W. DAVIS FUNERAL DIRECTOR AND LICENSED EIBAIMEL BOTH'PHONES DAY 137; NIGHT 299. : & i VN