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jNOVEIZED FROM THE WP < Jj J]M|®f PMOTOORAJPJHLS OF |fe -walS THE PIAY AS RfeOr>UCßl> Jf Bg| vv; SAVAGE-. f ■ ! copY>eiortr SYNOPSIS. Lieut. Harry Mallory Is ordered to the Philippines. He and Marjorie Newton ioclde to elope, but wrerk of taxicab pre rents their seeing minister on the way to the train. Transcontinental train is tak ing on passengers. Porter has a tuely time with an Englishman and Ira Latn rop, a Yankee business man. The elojxirs have an exciting time getting to the train. CHAPTER 111. (Continued.) Her nether lip trembled and her eyes were filmed, but they were brave, and her voice was so tender that it wooed his mind from his watch. He gazed at her, and found her so dear, so devoted and so pitifully exquisite, that he was almost overcome by an Impulse to gather her into his arms there and then, Indifferent to the Im mediate passengers or to his far-off military superiors. An hour ago they were young lovers in all the lilt and thrill of elopement. She had clung to him In the gloaming of their taxicab, as It sped like a genie at their whim to the place where the minister would unite their hands and raise his own in blessing. Thence the new husband would have carried the new wife away, bis very own, soul and body, duty and beauty. Then, ah, then In their minds the future was an unwanlng honeymoon, the journey across the continent, a stroll along a lover’s lane, the Pacific ocean a gar den lake, and the Philippines a chain of Fortunate Isles decreed especially for their Eden. And then the taxi cab encountered a lamppost. They thought they had merely wrecked a motor car —and 10, they had wrecked a Paradise. The railroad ceased to be a lover's lane and became a lingering torment; the ocean was a weltering Sahara, and the Philippines a Dry Tortugas of exile. Mallory realized fer the first time what heavy burdens he had taken on with his shoulfler straps; what a dis mal life of restrictions and hardships an officer’s life Is bound to be. Perhaps young Mr, Montague and youag Miss Capulet, Instead of wail ing, “No, that Is not the lark whose notes do beat tho vanity heaven so high above our heads,” would have done no better than Mr. Mallory and Miss Newton. In any case, the best those two could squeeze out was; “It’s just too bad, honey.” “But 1 guess It can’t be helped, dear.” “It’s a mean old world, Isn’t It?” “Awful!” And then they must pile out Into the street again so lost In woe that they did not know how they were trampled or elbowed. Marjorie’s de spair was so complete that it paralyzed Instinct. She forgot Snoozleums! A thoughtful passenger ran out and tossed the basket Into Mallory’s arms even as the car moved off. Fortune relented a moment and they found a taxicab waiting where they had expected to find It. Once more they were cosy in the flying twilight, but their grief was their only baggage, and the clasp of their hands talked all the talk there was. Anxiety within anxiety tormented them and they feared another wreck. But as they swooped down upon the station, a kind-faced tower clock beamed the reassurance that they had three minutes to spare. The taxicab drew up and halted, but they did not get out. They were kissing good-byes, fervidly and nu merously, while a grinning station porter winked at the winking chaur feur. Marjorie simply could not have done with farewells. “I’ll go to the gate with you,” she said. He told the chauffeur to w r alt and take the young lady home. The lieu tenant looked so honest and the girl so sad that the chauffeur simply touched his cap, though it was not his custom to allow strange fares to vanish into crowded stations, leaving behind nothing more negotiable than instructions to wait. CHAPTER IV. A Mouse and a Mountain. All the while the foiled elopers were eloping, fche San Francisco sleeper was filling up. It had been the receptacle of assorted lots of hu manity tumbling Into it from all di rections, with all sorts of souls, bodies and destinations. The porter received each with that expert eye of his. His car was his laboratory. A railroad journey Is a sort of test-tube of character; strange elements meet under strange condi tions and make strange combinations. The porter could never foresee the ingredients of any trip, nor their ac tions and reactions. He had no sooner established Mr. Wedgewood of London and Mr. Ira Lathrop of Chicago, In comparative repose, than his car was invaded by a woman who flung herself Into the first seat. She was flushed with run ning, and breathing hard, but managed one gasp of relief: ’Thank goodness, I made it ts time.” The mere sound of a woman’s voice In the seat back of him was enough to disperse Ira Lathrop. With not so much as a glance backward to see what manner of woman It might be, he jammed his contract into his pock et, seized his newspapers and retreat ed to the farthest end of the car, bouncing down Into berth number one, like a sullen snapping turtle. Miss Anne Gattic’s modest and homely valise had been brought Aboard by a leisurely station usher. who set It down and waited with a speaking palm outstretched. She had her tickets in her band, but trans ferred them to her teeth while she searched for money in a handbag old fashioned enough to be called a reti cule. The usher closed his fist on the pit tance she dropped Into it and depart ed without comment. The porter ad vanced on her with a demand for “Tickets, please.” She began to ransack her reticule with flurried haste, taking out of It a small purse, opening that, closing it, putting it back, taking it out, search ing the reticule through, turning out a handkerchief, a few' hairpins, a few trunk keys, a baggage check, a bot tle of salts, a card or two and nu merous other maidenly articles, re storing them to place, looking In the purse again, restoring that, closing the reticule, setting It down, shaking out a book she carried, opening her old valise, going through certain white things biushingly, closing It again, shaking her skirts, and shaking her head In bewilderment. She w r as about to open the reticule again, when the porter exclaimed: “I see it! Don’t look no mo’. I see it!” ' When she cast up eyes In de spair, her hatbrira had been elevated enough to disclose the whereabouts of the tickets. With a murmured apology, he removed them from her teeth and held them under the light. After a time he said; “As neah as I can make out from the —the undigested po’tlon of this ticket, yo’ numba is six.” “That’s it —six!” “That’s right up this wray.” “Let me sit here till 1 get my breath,” she pleaded. “I ran so hard to catch the train.” "Well, you caught It good and strong.” “I’m so glad. How soon do we start?” “In about half a houah.” “Really? Well, better half an hour too soon than half a minute too late.” She said It with such a copy-book primness that the porter set her down as a school-teacher. It was not a bad guess. She was a missionary. With a pupil-like shyness tie volunteered: “Yo’ berth Is all ready whenever you wishes to go to bald.” He caught her swift blush and amended it to — “to retlah.” “Retire? —before all the car?” said Miss Anne Cattle, with prim timidity. “No, thank you! I intend to sit up till everybody else has retired." The porter retired. Miss Gattle took out a bit of more or less useful fancy stitching and set to work like another Dorcas. Her needle had not -' - DREW LATHROP’S HEAD AFTER dived in and emerged many times be fore she was holding It up as a weap on of defense against a sudden hu man mountain that threatened to crush tier. A vague round face, huge and red as a rising moon, dawned before her eyes and from it came an uncertain voice: “Esscuzhe me, mad’m, no ’fensh In tended.” The words and the breath that car ried them gave the startled spinster an instant proof that her vis-a-vis did not share her prohibition principles or practices. She regarded the ele phant with mouse-like terror, and the elephant regarded the mouse with elephantine fright, then he removed himself from her landscape as quick ly as he could and lurched along the aisle, calling out merrily to the por ter; "Chauffeur! chauffeur; don't go so fasht 'round these comers.” He collided with a small train-boy singing his na&al lay, but It was the behemoth and not the train-boy that collapsed Into a seat, sprawling as helplessly as a mammoth oyster on a table-cloth. The porter rushed to his aid and hoisted him to bis feet with an un easy sense of Impending trouble. He felt as if someone had left a mon strous baby on his doorstep, but all he said was; “Tickets, please-” There ensued a long search, fat, flabby hands flopping and fumbling from pocket to pocket. Once more the porter was the discoverer. ■ .l •'* *1 see It Don’t look no mor. Hero ft la—up In yo’ hat band." He lifted it out and chuckled. “Had It right next Me brains and couldn’t remem ba!” He took up the appropriately huge luggage of the bibulous wan derer and led him tot the other end of the aisle. “Numba two la yours, sah. Right heah —all nice and cosy, and already made up.” The big man looked through the curtains fhto the cabined confinement, and groaned: “That! Haven’t you got a man’s size berth?” “Sorry, sah. That’s as big a bunk as they is on the train.” “Have I got to be locked up in that pigeon-hole for —for how many days Is it to Reno?” “Reno?" The porter greeted that meaningful name with a smile. “We’re doo in Reno the —the —mawnln’ of the fo’th day, sah. Yassah.” He put the baggage down and started away, but the fat man seized his hand, with great emotion: “Don't leave me all alone In there, porter, for I’m a broken-hearted man.” “Is that so? Too nad, sah.” “Were you ever a broken-hearted man, porter?” "Always, sah.” “Did you ever put your trust In a false-hearted woman?” “Often, sah.” “Was she ever true to you, por ter?” “Never, sah.” “Porter, we are partners In mls sis-ery.” And he wrung the rough, black hand with a solemnity that embarrassed the porter almost as much as It would have embarrassed the passenger him self if he could have unierstood what he was doing. The porter disengaged Aimseif with a patient but hasty: “I’m afraid you’ll have to ’sense me. I got to he’p the other passengers on bude.” “Don’t let me keep you from your duty. Duty is the —the —” But he could not remember what duty was, and he would have dropped off to sleep, if he had not been startled by a familiar voice which the porter had luckily escaped. “Pawtah! Pawtah! Can’t you raise this light—or rather can’t you lower it? Pawtah! This light is so In fernally dim I can’t read.” To the Englishman’s Intense amaze ment his call brought to him not the porter, but a rising moon with the profound query; “Whass a li’l thing like dim light, when the light of your life has gone out?” “I beg your pardon?” Without further invitation, the mammoth descended on the English man’s territory. “I’m a broken-hearted man, Mr. — Mr—l didn’t get your name.” “Er —ah —I dare say.” “Thanks, I will sit down.” He lift ed a great carry-all and airily tossed it into the aisle, set the Gladstone on the lap of the infuriated, English man, and squeezed into the seat op posite, making a sad mix-up of knees. “My name’s Wellington. Ever hear of H’l Jimmie Wellington? That’s me.” “Any relation to the Duke?” “Nagh!” He no longer Interested Mr, Wedge wood. But Mr. Wellington was not aware that he was being snubbed. He went right on getting acquainted: “Are you married, Mr. —Mr. —?” “No!” “My heartfelt congrashlations, HIS HAIR ACROSS THE SEAT. - • . ■ ' Hang on to your luck, my boy. Don't let any female take it away ffom you." He slapped the Englishman on the elbow amiably, and his prisoner was too stifled with wrath to emit more than one feeble "Pawtah!” Mr. Wellington mused aloud: “Oh, if 1 had only remalf-ecl single. | But she was so beautiful and she swore to love, honor and obey. Mrs. i Wellington is a queen among women, mind you, and I have nothing to say against her except that she nas the temper of a tarantula.” He italicized the w r ord with a light fillip of his left hand along the back of the seat. He did not notice that he filliped the angry head of Mr. Ira Lathrop in the next seat. He went on with his por trait of his wife. "She has the ’stravaganza of a sultana” —another fillip for Mr, Lathrop—“the zhealousy of a cobra, the flirtatiousness of a humming bird.” Mr. Lathrop was glar ing round like a man-eating tiger, but Wellington talked on. "She drinks, swears Mid smokes cigars, otherwise she’s fine —a queen among women." Neither this amazing vision of wom ankind, nor this beautiful example of longing for confession and sympathy awakened a response. Then as Mr. Wellington shook* with joy at the prospect, of “Dear old Reno!” he began unconsciously to draw Ira Lathrop’s head after bis hair across the seat. The pain of it shqr the tears into Lathrop's eyes, and a* he writhed and twisted he was too full of profanity to get any one word out. (TO RK CONTINUED.* SERVING THE TOMATO DELICIOUS METHODS OF PREPAR ING WHOLESOME VEGETABLE. Recipe That | 8 Highly In Favor In Southern Italy—Meat Scallop, en Casserole—With New Pota toes and Nut Butter. The origin of the tomato has never been positively ascertained, writes Henrietta D. Graue! in the Cleveland Leader. It was cultivated centuries | ago in Mexico and Peru and in the sixteenth century it was brought into England and- cultured as an exotic, but was supposed to be an active poison because a member of the night shade family. Travelers found the Netherlands eating it as a vegetable, with salt, pepper and oil a few years later, and Italians soon commenced cultivating it and using it as an ac companiment to nearly every dish. Neither in America nor in any other country has it been so commonly eaten, separately and in combinations, as in southern Italy. Tomatoes are a sovereign remedy for dyspepsia and digestive troubles and are among our most wholesome articles of food. A choice recipe: Choose tomatoes of uniform size and from each one cut, after skin ning, three or four choice to use for salad, for broiling or for garnishing. Put these in the refrig erator and proceed to cut the remain ing pieces In cqbes. Heat a little butter In a frying pan and in it brown a cup of bread cut in small squares. Add the tomatoes and cook gently un til they are tender and almost dry. Sprice with cloves, cinnamon and a very small bit of mace; add a table spoonful of sugar and a eup of milk or cream containing a teaspoon of cornstarch. Continue stirring until the mixture is cs thick as rich cream. Italian Meat Scallop; En Casserole. —Two cups of cold boiled rice, one cup of tomato cut in small bits, tw'O cups of cold meat cut fine (chicken Is best), a slice of onion If desired. Mix these together and place in a baking dish with alternate layers of buttered crumbs w'ell seasoned with paprika, salt and ground sw'eet pep pers. Bake thirty minutes. A decidedly rich combination is to matoes with new potatoes and nut butter; this is “anew discovery” and mighty fine. Soften three tablespoons of nut butter with hot milk and mix with a cup of mashed, well seasoned potatoes. Shape into a long roll and cut in lengths of three inches. Roll these loaves in flour and brown in hot butter and serve w'ith broiled pota toes; or with w r ell seasoned tomato sauce. Broiled Tomatoes. —Place the slices on a broiler or on a bacon rack, sprinkle w'ith salt and pepper and broil over or under a moderate fire about tw'enty minutes; turn once. Serve on a heated platter and dress with melted butter. Stuffed With Succotash. —Remove the inside of the tomatoes and mix with a cup of succotash, refill the to mato and V lug with melted butter. - ’-V Kitchenettes. Many housewives believe in boiling new earthenv'are before using It, as this effectually t oughens and hardens it. This is particularly efficacious in the case of ordinary brown kitchen ware, the articles being placed in a large pan of cold water W'hich is then brought slowfiy to a boil. After being allowed to boil for ten minutes remove the pan and allow the water to cool before taking out the ware. A kitchen bouquet for flavoring soups can easily be made. Take a few sprigs of parsley and wrap them around peppercorns, whole cloves, a bay leaf and other herbs that are at hand. Tie up tightly. This can be re moved from the soup without trouble. To make string beans or cabbage tender in cooking them and also to ihorten the time required for cooking ;he latter vegetable, add a pinch of making soda to the water in which they are boiled. This, used judicious ly, makes the vegetables as fresh and tender as when they came frrjpi the garden. Washing Silver, How r many know that to let silver stand in sour milk a half hour, then wash in good soapy water wfill make it look as bright as to polish it with silver paste? When lace curtains are ready to be washed, baste a narrow strip of muslin !in along each outer edge and let re main until ironed (or drying process is completed), and you will find your curtains are straight and do not sag as usual. A tablespoonful of vinegar put Into the water in which meats or fowls are boiled makes them tender. Camphor put in drawers or trunks will keep mice away. Spanish Cream. Over one-half package of gelatine pour one cup of cold water and set aside for two hours, heat a pint of milk to scalding point and pour it over the soaked gelatine, stirring all the time. When the gelatine Is entirely dissolved add the yolks of four eggs i that have been beaten light, with a small cup of powdered sugar. Stir over the fire for three minutes, then take off the range and flavor with vanilla. Let it get cold, but not stiff, and whip Into it gradually one pint of Shipped cream. Turn into a mold wet with cold water and set in the ice to form. This is a delightful rich dessert and Is wholesome. Antiseptic Soap. Five pounds rendered fat; one can concentrated lye; three pints cold w-a ter. one heaping teaspoonful pulver ised borax; one cup of ammonia; two ounces glycerine; two teaspoons car bolic acid. Pour can potash into the water and let stand till dissolved, stir occasionally. Add ammonia and borax. Melt fat and add. then stir till of a creamy consistency, then put In glycerin© and acid. Perfume with extract of sassafras. Turn soap into granite pan to harden Mark off while soft Follow directions car© fully.—“ Home Department,” Nations Magazine. GOOD SUBSTITUTE FOR MEAT Will Be Appreciated, as a Change, by Those Who Are Not Strict Vegetarians. This dish calls for two cupfuls of thoroughly boiled cold barley, one cup ful of finely ground roasted peanuts, one cupful of fine bread crumbs, one teaspoonful of salt and one saltspoon fui of white pepper or paprika, one stick of celery, two tablespoonfuls of >llve oil or three of butter, four table ipoonfuls of browned flour, one largo Dnion. and vegetables stock or water. Make a brown sauce of the oil, flour, and vegetable stock to thin to the consistency of thick cream sauce. Chop the onion fine and simmer it five minutes in a tablespoonful of but ter, then stir in the barley, then the peanuts and bread crumbs mixed to gether with the salt, pepper, and cel ery. Add the hot brown sauce (left aver gravy may be used for this). Mold into a loaf, mixing all ingredi ents well. Grease a roasting pan. place the loaf in it and cook in a hot Dven ten minutes; then add a table spoonful of butter melted in a cupful of hot water and baste with this every five minutes for one-half hour. Remove to a hot platter and make a cupful of brown gravy in the pan and serve in a sauceboat. If toma toes are in season, garnish the plat ter with slices dipped in seasoned flour and fried brown. Over all sprinkle the minced parsley. Other cooked cereals or combina tions of cereals may substitute the barley. A corn and rice mixture would be good. DESSERT DISHES OF RHUBARB Pudding. Tapioca, or Shortcake, Any Ore of Them Makes a De licious Confection. Rhubarb Pudding.—Mash half a pound of bag or pulled figs, or use dates or raisins or a mixture of all or of two of these fruits. Cover with boiling water and cook until water is nearly absorbed. Cut a pound of rhubarb in inch pieces, put a layer of the cooked dried fruit, and repeat un til all is used. Add a quarter of a cup of hot water and bake in a slow oven until the rhubarb is soft. Serve cold alone or with cream. Rhubarb Tapioca.—Soak half a cup of tapioca over night and cook until clear in a double boiler. Place in a buttered pudding dish two cups of rhubarb, cut in small pieces: one cup of sugar and a pinch of ginger. Pour he hot tapioca over this, stir in one :easpoonful of butter, cover and bake me hour. Put a meringue on it be fore serving, if you like, or serve it cold, with plain or whipped cream. Rhubarb Shortcake. —Put two cups of rhubarb, cut small, with a scant cup of sugar in a double boiler and cook until rhubarb is tender and sugar dissolved. Add the juice and chopped rind of one lemon. Make a shortcake by your favorite recipe, but cut and bake it like biscuit. When done, break open, butter them and ar range on a hot dish. Put the rhubarb n between, and when serving pour :he juice over them. Successful Jelly Making. Use good fruit which is a little un ler ripe. Use the best granulated sugar. No not make large quantities of ielly at one cooking. Heat the sugar in the oven before idding it to the fruit juice. If the juice must be boiled down, ilways do so before the sugar Is idded. The jelly will be clearer and finer if the fruit is simmered gently and not stirred during cooking. Do not al*ow the syrup to boil rap idly, or crystals may appear in jelly. Always make jelly on a bright, clear day. Wash the jelly glasses in hot water and set them on a folded cloth wrung out of hot water. Set the jelly in a sunny window' for twenty-four hours, then rover with melted paraffin and set in a dry, cool place.—Woman’s World. Cooking Hint. A housewife of many years' experi ence, who has made her “home keep ing” a prominent part of her w r ork, studying, originating and improving methods, finds that sweet potatoes cook much more quickly if, after they are washed, they are left to stand a while in cold water before they are put on the stove to cook. Pour boiling water on them, with salt to properly season them. Stewed Beetroot. Bake the beetroot one hour, when cold take off the skin, cut it into slices a quarter of an inch thick, put it into a stcwpan with half a pint of any stock, a saltspoon of salt, the same of pepper, one-half a grain of cayenne, a shalot chopped, tw'o sprigs of parsley chopped; simmer three quarters of an hour, add a wineglass of vinegar and serve. Shrinking Cotton. As cotton materials shrink they must either be shrunk in the piece or made a size larger and luck trusted that the garment may not shrink be yond all wearing. In shrinking any thing, use boiling water until it is thoroughly saturated and then wring out and dry; sprinkle and iron on the w’rong side with a hot iron until the fabric is perfectly dry. To Press Serge, This popular fabric is even more ol a favorite for suits than usual, and the only objection one can have to the material is its proneness to become shiny. Here is a way to overcome this objection. If It is sponged with hot vinegar and pressed in the usual manner the shiny appearance will en tirely disappear. The vinegar does not stain or leave an odor. Sweet Crackers. Dissolve five cents’ worth of bakers ammonia in two cups of sweet milk over night. In the morning cream 2*£ cups of sugar and one cup of but ter. Beat two eggs and add to butter and sugar. Then add the milk and three tablespoons of any flavor. Then flour to make a stiff batter, foil very thin, cut with cookie cutter, take ii quick oven. JUSr CAUSE FOR FtDE. / * Cfct. I / \ \ “Wot’s he so tickled about?” “He’s jest discovered his birthday’s on de same day as Ad Wolgast’s!” BROKE OUT IN HEAT RASH 822 Georgia Ave., East Nashville, Tenn. —“My baby was about two months old when he began to break out in small red pimples like heat rash, afterward turning into festers. They gradually spread until his little head, face, groins and chest, his head being most affected, became a mass of sores with a great deal of corrup | tion. It became offensive and gradual ly grew worse. I kept a tvhite cap on I him to keep him from scratching, it seemed to itch so badly. It made him cross and his chest and groins would often bleed. “Nothing seemed to help it, and I had almost come to the conclusion ! that my baby’s case was hopeless, when hearing of the Cuticura Soap and | Cuticura Ointment. I decided to try it. I noticed at once that baby rested bet ter. I continued it for a few weeks and my baby was entirely cured by the Cuti cura Soap and Ointment. They cured where all others failed.” (Signed) Mr. E. O. Davis, Nov. 28. 1912. Cuticura Soap and Ointment sold 1 throughout the world. Sample of each free, with 32-p. Skin Book. Address post-card “Cuticura, Dept. L, Boston.” She Was a Duster. Mrs. Sutton advertised for a woman to do general housework, and in an swer a colored girl called, announcing that she bad come for the position. “Are you a good cook?” asked Mrs. Sutton. “No, Indeed, I don’t cook,” was the reply. “Are you a good laundress?” “I wouldn’t do washin’ and ironin’; it’s too hard on the hands.” “Can you sweep?” asked Mrs. Sut i ton. ! “No,” was the positive answer. ‘Tin not strong enough.” “Well,” said the lady of the house, quite exasperated, “may I ask what you can do?” “1 dusts,” came the placid reply.— Everybody’s. Shock for a Brother. “John,” said an eminent physician, wearily, 'entering his home after a hard day’s work, “John, if anyone calls excuse me.” “Yes, sub,” agreed John, the old family darkey. “Just say,” explained the doctor, “that the masseur is with me.” A little later the doctor’s brother called —called and received the shock of his life. “I want to see the doctor at once,” ■eid be. "Yuh can’t do it, sur,” solemnly an nounced the old darkey, turning up his eyes till the whites alone showed. “Yuh can’t do it, suh. The doctor, suh, am wid de Messiah.” —New York Evening Sun. Deliberating. The Rev. James Hamilton, minister of Liverpool, while on holiday in Scot land, had a narrow escape from drowning. Accompanied by a boy, Mr. Hamilton w r as fishing for sea-trout when he slipped on a stone, lost his balance, and being encumbered with heavy wading boots, had great diffi culty in keeping his head above water. Finally he managed to get back to the shore, although in a very exhausted state, and said to the boy: “I noticed that you never tried to help me.” “Na,” was the deliberate response, “but T was thinkin’ o't.” UNREASONABLE GROWNUPS. “Goodness, little boy, why don’t wash your face?” “Say, lady, you wanter git up on yer dates; this ain’t Sattidy,” His View. Hewitt —This place is 1,000 feet above the sea level. Jewett —But the sea isn’t on the level; it always makes me sick. I say the degree of vision that dwells in a man is a correct measure of the man. —Carlyle. “He bit the hand that fed him” said Teddy of Big Bill, And didn’t tell us if the bite had made the biter ill. Now had Toasties been the subject of Bill’s voracious bite He’d have come back for another with a keener appetite. A Written by WrLtIAM T. HINCKS, 207 State St., Bridgeport, Conn. One of the 50 Jingles for which the Postum Cos;, Battle Creek, Mich., paid SIOOO.OO in May. RECORD OF TIME’S CHANGES Surely Visitor to the Scenes of Hit Coyhocd Could Not Fail to Be Impressed. "I reckon you see the old town look ins some different from what it looked when you left it thirty years ago.’* said Uncle Eb Skinner to the native returning for a visit to the scenes of his boyhood. “All o' the back part o' Peevy’s store Is new since your day here, an’ that bay winder in the drug store was put in since you left us. The deepo used to be painted yeller instid o’ red, an’ the town hall is het by steam now instid o’ wdth stoves, like it used to was in your time. Then two iron hitch posts in front o’ the postoffice ain’t been there more than ten years, and that stone watering trough instid o’ the old wooden one you remember fs another change. I reckon you’ve noticed that Hi Greene has raised his house a story an’ add ed a summer kitchen. That piazzy in front o’ the hotel is another change In the old town, an’, of course, you’ve noticed the new boss sheds back o’ the church an’ the broom shop wa’n’t here when you was a boy with us. It employs five hands reg’lar an’ seven in the rush season. Time makes changes, as I reckon you have seen.’’ —From Judge. WAS SORRY FOR HIM. J * Janitor —Stop playing that trom bone; the man in the next room aaya he can’t read, Dinkheimer —Ach, vot Ignorance ness! I could read ven I vas fife years oldt! They Are Overworked Now. Four-year-old Dick had made an im portant discovery that his hair would pull out if enough force was exerted, and was absorbed in proving the fas cinating find on his forelock. His sis ter —aged seven —noted the proceed ing with round-eyed horror. “Dickie! Dickie!” she cried, “you mustn’t do that!" “Why?” demanded Dtekle, with the cynicism of childhood. “Because the Bible says that all your hairs are numbered —and if you pull an}' out you’ll make a lot of extra bookkeeping for the angels.” Mixture of Caution and Economy. At the Union depot a few' evenings ago a mother who had gone to see her daughter, a miss of about 18 years, safely started on a journey, was heard to give the young lady the following words of advice just before the train started: “Now, good-by , my dear. Take good care of yourself and re member not to be too free with strangers on the train. But if a nice looking man should speak to you be polite to him —he may buy your sup per for you.”—Kansas City Star. Twas a Pretty Thing. The young man produced a small, square box from his pocket. “I have a present for you,” ho be gan. “I don’t know’ whether it will fit your finger or not, but ” “Oh, George!” she broke in, “this is so sudden! Why, I never dreamed —’’ But just then George produced the gift—a silver thimble —and it got sud denly cooler in the room. —Ladies’ Horne Journal. Her Ruling Passion. The woman who had chased dust and dirt all her life finally reached St. Peter. “Come in, you poor, tired woman,’’ he said, and held the gate ajar. But the woman hesitated. “Tell me first,” she said, “how often you clean house?” The saint smiled. “You can’t shake off the ruling pas sion,. can you?” he said. “Oh, well, step inside and they’ll give you a broom and dustpan instead of a harp.” —Cleveland Plain Dealer. Its Advantages. “I think the pillory ought to be re vived as punishment for this frenzied financing.” “Why so?” “Because it provided a fitting penal ty in stocks and bonds.” Their Need. Seedy Applicant—l can bring tears to the eyes of the audience. Theatrical Manager—Huh! We want somebody who can bring the au dience. —Puck. Nothin' In It. Teacher of infant geography class — John Mace may tell uu what a strait is. John Mace —It’s jus’ th’ plain stuff, ’thout nothin’ in it. —Judge. in the Suburbs. “Is Mrs. Gillet a W'ell-informed wom an?” “Well, she’s on a party wire.” —Life. Brilliant baseball plays are diampnd sparkles.