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Legends of the West.
The editor who goes west to mould public opinion and illustrate the power of the press has not a path of roses before him. When he has once started a paper it is easy enough to get subscribers. The people swarm into the office with their rough generosity and tell him to put their names down and send the bill in any time. In this way the smiling editor gets a subscription list as long as the patience of Job; he hires a tall foreman with a boil on his neck to oversee things, and a boy with a copious mouth to run errands and rush the growler. After a while the editor sends in his bills to his numerous subscribers, and they call up to tell him he has gall to expect anything for his darned old paper. "Thar ain't no news in it, nohow; ef ye like, I'll come up and show ye how to run things and make her howl." They are always willing to do this; these horny-handed pioneers just love to go about doing good and making things howl, but they have never con tracted the habit of paying their debts. Then, the editor being broke, the foreman mops off the ceilinig with him and leaves, taking his boil- with him; the copious mouth with the boy ad hering to it also leaves, and adds in sult to injury by stealing the growler. Then the editor grows bitter. and says mean things about his subscrib ers. and they come up to his office in the cold gray dawn, and run him through his own hand press, and leave his mangled form wrapped up in an esteemed cotemporary. It was in the glad spring that a young man with pale eyes and a bald face came to the village of Hooper's Rapids and bought out the Astonish er, a weekly paper which had for its motto: "We fight for Home." The previous editor had fought for grub principally and he ended the long, fruitless struggle by wrpping a pine coffin about him, and going to sleep with his fathers. His untimely end was hastened by handful of buckshot which had been shot into him by a gentleman named Howling Henry. Howling Henry just pined for bloodshed and commotion; he loved to utter his merry war-whoop and jab his bowie-knife into a man's back until it grated against his collar button. When the pale young man bought the Astonisher, Howling Henry called upon him and opened a pleasant inter view by telling the pale young man that he had a weakness for whipping editors. "I will bet," he said cheer fully, "that I can twist you around your suspenders until there's nothing left of you but a pale green necktie sticking out of your ears." In the enthusiam that followed Howling Henry wasn't sure whether he was mixed up, with a water spout or sitting under, a pile driver, but when he crawled out of a brick yard across the street and looked up at the window of the Astonisher office, where the pale young editor whistied softly, "Baby's got the colic," Howl ing Henry shoved hiA backbone into its socket and said: "I guess I'll e~migrate while the walking's good." 'And a voice from the editorial room of the Astonisher fell upon his ears: "We'll meet, love, again by the sea." -Walt Mason in the Whip. The Aged Tramp. The lady of a Cottage Hill house, the nurse girl and cook, held a brief consultation and concluded that an old man whose toes stuck out of his boots and the crown of whose summer hat was held by a hinge of straw and flapped up and down in the wind, dis closing the fact that the aged wearer was bald-very bald- must be really worthy, and they invited him to a seat in the kitchen while his breakfast was being prepared. The fragrance of the frying pan revived the drooping spirits of the aged tramp and unlock ed the streams of conversation which the cold charities of the world had frozen up. Tilting his chair back he said: "The people of the oil regions appear to get along right slick. Everywhere I have been things look comfortable and homelike, and busi ness seems to be crowding ahead." With this as a starter the old man carried the conversation through sta, e and national politics, religion, litera ture, etc. "I like my meat well done" he suggested to the cook, who he ob served was preparing to lift the steak from the stove; "and that reminds me, he went on. "that the Russians are persuing an under-tone, wishy-washy course on the banks ofithe Danube."' He tightened the cord that held his coat together in lieu of buttons, flapp ed an ear to unseat a troublesome fly and continued: "Dog my cats if it dent make me half mad at the Czar. If I had command of that army, do you know what I would do?" and he shut one eye and glared at the lady of the house as inquiringly as a catechism. No one seemed to know. "I would push right across,"' exclaimed the old man, striking the sink with his fist, "and if I wouldn't make them greasy Turks hunt their holes there's no here after. All it requires is a pontoon bridge, and a little git up and go'long Mary Jane." His breakfast was ready and thrusting his legs under the table with the air of a man who had just bought the house and lot and paid the money down, he harpooned a roasted potato and continued: "Old Hopand gofetchit, who has command of the Russian zouaves, is in the obest posi tion to skip right along into Constan tinople and take possession of the Court house. I would do it--I swear to gracious I would do it," and he reached out and captured a hard boil ed egg. I would do it so quick it would make their everlasting heads swim. Then I would take a run across the Mediterranean. flop down on the Suez canal boats, tear up the tow path and take possession of the mules. Then across the country to the Gulf of Mexico, I would fly as the hurricane, leaving death and desola tion in my-see here, Susan," he said breaking off short and addressing the nurse girl, "for the love of heaven don't hold the baby with his head down." The old gent continued to draw in the victuals like a man who hadn't tasted a bite for six months, and talk ing in a way to turn a book agent green with envy. He told the woman what Congress ought to do when it meets, and finally shoved,away from the table, wiped his lips on the cloth and asked if they had an old pair of pants that wasn't bagged at the knees. The pants were hunted up by the lady of the house, who in turn asked if he would go out into the garden patch and kill a few potato bugs for her. "Potato bugs," he said, as he gath ered up his hat and passed to the door, "potato bugs are something with which I have had no experience, I don't know one from a jay bird. But a friend of mine will be here about noon who can kill more potato bugs in a minute than you can shake a stick at. I'll leave a chalk mark on the gate post and he will call. Tr-te," and the aged tramp tipped his hat gayly and was off, his stomach stick ing out in front of him like a lay window.--Oil City Derrick. --- Steamboat Arrivals. There have been eleven steamboat arrivals at Fort Benton and the Marias this year. This is not bad considering the river, which has been somewhat erratic this season. They have brought 46,000 packages for Ft. Benton merchants and have taken down river 1,500,000 pounds of wool. --River Press. EI.. CANARY, Coh tactio aod ldier, BRICK AIND STONE WORK. Great Falls, - Mont. H. H. CHANDLER, ASSAYER, Great Falls, Mont. Samples sent by mail or express carefully assayed and returns promptly made. Charges reason able, Fast Freight Line -BETWEEN Great Falls and Helena. FRANK S. HYDX. Prop. Round trip made in mine days. Charges Rea sonable. W.'Leave orders at Tanaux ofice...d ' POWDER Absolutely Pure. Thispowdhr never varies. A marveiof purity strength and wholesomeness. More economica than the ordinary kinds, and cannot be sold in competition with the multitude of low test, shor weight, alum or phosphrte powders. Soldonly in cans. RIOYAL B.a&A o POWDas Co.. 107 Wall st., New York. BERT HIY, Architect. GREAT F ALLS, MONT. This Space Reserved for PHIL GIBSON, R.8l Estate ard Insurance A et. PATENTS Obtained,. and: all PATENT BUSINESS at home or abroad att.nded to for MODERATE FEES. Our offic ies opposite the U. S. Patent Office. and we can obtainh patents inless time than those remote from WASHINGTON. Send MODEL OR DRAWING. We advise asto patentability fr.e. of chrrae: and we CHARGE NO FEE UNLESS PATENT IS ALLOWED. We refer, here, to the IPostmaster, the Supt. of Money Order Div.. and to officials of the U. S. P'atent Office. For circular, advice, terms, and references to actual clients in your own State or county, write to C. A. SNOW & CO.. OLpositePatentOflice Washington. D .C. issued March and Sept., each year. * 216 pages, S(x 11Q- inches,with over 3,500 illuatrations - a whole Picture Gallery. GIVES WVholesale Prices direct fo consumers on all goods for personal or family use. Tells how to order, and gives exact cost of every thing you use, eat, drink, wear, or have fsn with. These INVALUABLE BOOKS contain information gleaned from the markets of the world. We will mail a copy FREE to any ad dress upon receipt of 10 cts. to defray expense of mating. Let us hear from you. iRespettully, m MONTGOMERY WARD & CO. 227 b 229 Wabash Areanue, Chcagae , Il. $1. 13 -TEES 13 The POLICE GAZETTE will be mailed, securely wrapped, to any ad dress in the United States for three months on receipt of $I. ONE DOLLAR $s. Liberal discounts allowed to post mase! aIents and clubs. Sample raiesiSd frxee. . w - . Addr.~ all orders to RICHARD K. FOX, F1isax tKLIN 'N. SAt5T. A. NATHAN, 'Tb.e Or.e 9Price Clothier Has Now Opened! With a full and Complete Stock of Clothing, Gents' Furnishing Goods, Boots and Shoes, Hats, Caps, Blankets, Quits, Oil and Rubber Goods, Trunks, Valises, Etc., Etc., Etc HAVING COME TO STAY I am Prepared to SellGoods at BOTTOM PRICES. Call and examine Goods and Prices before purchasingelswhere. Next Door to TaRIUNa Office, - . Great Falls, Mont Ready for Business Now. BEN. E. LAPEYER, DERUGGIST, DEALER IN--- Freh Drugs, Patent Medicines, Stationery, Wall and BUILDING PAPER, PAINTS, Oils, Glass Lamps, Cigars, Etc., Etc. Prescriptions carefully Compounded at all Hours. Dunlap & Arthur, --DEALERS IN groceries, Provisions, Hradw are, Steel Nails, Etc. A Share of Your Patronage Solicited. Great Falls, - - - Montana Higgins House! GREAT FALLS, MONTANA H. H. HIG GINS, PROP. Largest and Best Hotel in the City, CHARGES REASONABLE. Cascade Restaurant, Groeat Falls. Mont. STEVE SPITZLEY, Manager, The Only First-Class Restaurant in the City. .Furnished Rooms in Connection@3 P UODIIlV .! General ntldand , , RIU[IERSNn Mineral Business, Mines Examined and Report+. Plans. Etc.. Executed. S___ --i... ---- A Specialty. Unitedi tat~kl ,nd OlficelPlaton filecovering Jant 80 square miles rf Northern iontana, - Correspondence invited. GREAT FALLS, MONT Mrs. MARY DIRKING, PROPRIETRESS. I11i g . Best Hotel in the City SPURGIN & CROWDER, ' -Dlers in Corner Ist. Ave Sth. & 2d. St., -Great Falls. MANUFACTURING JEWELER. Repairing of all kinds done Neatly and fully Warranted. Charges Reasonable GREAT FALLS, Mont.