Vol- 1. BATTLE MOUNTAIN NEVADA. FRIDAY, FHIHiUARY 0, 1885._ >fo. 4 THE CENTRAL NEVADAN. PUBLISHED WEEKLY BY DENNIS & ELLSWORTH. Authorized Agents. C. W. CRANE, 31ft Pine Street, Room 39, Baa Francieco, California. L. P. FISH Kit, Room 21 Merchant’s Ex change. San Francisco, Cal. qBO. M. MOTT, Nos. 42 and 44 .1 street, Sacramento, is our only agent in that city. OEO. P. ROWELL A 00., 10 Spruve street, New York City, New York. CRAB. K. MILLER A OO., No. 2 Tribune Building. Chicago, Illinois. Ths above agents are authorised to collect vontyc due the Mmmknokr, take orders for •grertMng, solicit subscribers and attend to anv ^hcr b-miaeiw for us that may be connected with Mia Wice. ram of m bm iiption. Om Tear.• 00 Btx Months. * BATES OP ADVEBTI4INS Ont Square, ten lines, first insertion.f8 no Each subarquent insertion.. 1 fid ti3T Orders for Subscription, Advertising, and Job Work, will receive prompt at ten ton. EVIDENCE PRODUCED. Wkm the Bottle Wai Produced, all Doubt Disappeared. Old Judge McTeal, whom, years ago, the harvester gathered and stored away in the great ham of eter nity, was one of Arkansaw's first cir cuit riders of the law. There were only two circuit riders in the State, and the log houses in which *he grand and petit juries assembled, were a week's journey apart. The natives were all anxious to see a judge, be lieving him to he a man of great stature and an intellect from which hut few scrupa of information were kept hidden. McTeal was rather a small man, with mottled complexion and a nose which seemed to have caught the lingering rays of an autumn sun. One day while riding along toward Rent Shank court-house, he lost the “blazed trail,” wandered for a time in the woods and finally came u|*m a •mall cabin built of round logs. He was in the act of drawing a long breath, preparatory to a lusty “helloa," when he was startled by the swelling notes of a hymn which •uddenly arose. Nothing more (prick ly revives the memory of sacred teachings than a song of religious praise bursting upon an unex|iectant car, and the judge, being a man of orthodox faith, was thankful that in such a wild place he had found men who were endeavoring to walk in the footsteps of I’eter and Raul. When lie entered, the congregation stopjied singing and looked at him. The t>reaclicr, who stood with his elbows resting on a tall slab bench, gazed at him intently and said : Thar seems to lie a disturbin’ ele ment in the fold. Stranger, whut mout Is* your lius'ness?’’ The judge, who was emharassed to see that his presence had wrought •itch a change, replied that having lost his way he had come upon the house, and finding that religious ser vices were being held, had entered, glad of the opportunity to indulge his appetite for worship. “We hafter he mighty keerful, podner," rejoined the preacher. “Xou mout be a true seeker airter the straight an’ narrow path, but then again you moutent. To tell you tbs truth—an’ it's one o’ my habits to be plain—f don’t like the wuy you've got yourself rigged up. We don’t put on no style out lie re, an' wo don't see why a honest man aughter put on thorn sorter duds. What mout wyour business, podner?” “I am (he newlv appointed judge of tins circuit." The preacher and congregation laughed. The idea of such a small man being a judge was inconsistent with the people's preconceived esti mation of such a dignitary. "fiOok here, poduer, said the Keacher, throwing one leg over tho nch, putting one hand under his chin and shoving out his whiskers until they pointed at the judge, “we ain’t all professors o’ lamin’, an'it mout take us some time to cal’clate a eclipse o’the sun, moon an’ stairs, but Uiar’s a right smart sprinklin’ o' bus*sense ’imingHt us. A judge eh?” 1 ulling back his whiskers, tho Jjreacher discharged a mouthful of ambler" and nodded at the judge as though he would clinch his last remark. “(ienUemen, you are of course en titled to your opinions," said the jurist, “hut we will wave all that aside. Please proceed with your de votional exercises.” "No," replied the preacher, “we about through now." "1 hope that iny presence has not caused you to give up a performance ■o laudable." "Talks like a judge, dinged if he don’t," said a red headed deacon, slowly shaking his head as though Wavering between a continuation of disbelief and a conviction that the judge had spoken tiie truth. “Yaw,” replied the preacher, “but talk is easy. JCf I was to slick up a little an’ go irtfo a strange neighbor hood an’ give tho folks a few lines o’ roy best conversation, w’y they’d think that I had writ a ’rithmetic or been speaker o’ tho legislatur." Although the judge’s pride to some extent suffered, yet the incredulity of the congregation amused him. “Par he. "we will not further discuss the. question or wnetner or not I am a judge, for on an occasion of this kind it really makes no differ e.’.ce. How is it, my p tod friends, that I see no women in the congre gation?” “Becase thar ain't none here, I reckon," rejoined the preacher. “Yes, very likely that is one rea son.” “Ah’ another reason,” continued the preacher, “iB beeasc they didn’t come.” This logic was so convincing that the congregation laughed. “Why did they not come?” asked the judge. “Wall, they had to stay at home an’ take keer o’ tno chi dun. The wimmen folks don’t need no preachin’ fur, bless ’em, they are good enough without it" “Well, gentlemen, as services ure closed for to-day, I do not think that there would be anv impropriety in taking a little something to drink. I have some excellent stuff here ” con tinueit the judge, taking out a hottle. "I'll jine you," said the preacher, throwing out a quid of tobacco. Turn ing up the liottle, ho took a lingering “pull,” and said : “Ah, boys, blamed if I don't be lieve be is a judge." Turing up the bottle again, and hesitating some time before he took it down, lie wi|ief the ardent worshipers. All of the jrothers assisted him in finding the ftlazed trail. “Never since that ■ime,” said the judge, in speaking of the event, “have I found a church where I was held in such high es teem.” A Lord's PrrillrMineiit* Thiring his journey North, Lord Salisbury, the Conservative leader of the House of I.ords, changed his cos tume for a full Highland rig-out, in tending it as a delicate compliment to the land ofitlie kilt. Hut w hen he looked at himself in the glass he found that the tailor had cut his petticoats, or whatever they are called, too short. Ho he made up his mind to put on evening dress. He changed his upper garments ami then sat dow n to read his speech. This sent him to sleep, lie only woke with a start to find himself running into the station. Forgetting what had hap|>oiicd, he thrust on his hat and ap|s-ared at the window bowing, and this w as how he was dressed : He lutd full Highland costume as far as Ills waist, above was a white shirt and sw allow-tailed coat and the entire edifice was crowned with a chimney pot hat, upon which lie sat dow n with out noticing it. His lordship's horror when he stepped on the platform and felt tlie keen wind cutting his bare legs changed to absolute agony when his valet appeared scrambling out of tlieearriage with a pair of trowsers in his hands, waving them wildly and exclaiming: "My lord, my lord, you've forgotten these!” Wh«rt Not'to Start a Taper. In his letter to the amateur journal ists, Hubert J. Burdette offers some sage advice regarding the starting of newspapers. Says lie: If lie start a newspajier in a town where nobody wants a paper; Or where there are already five pa pers in a two-paper town; - Or, if a long primer man tries to ■tart a nonpareil pa|>cr; Or, if he try to run an eight column paper on a two-column basis; Or, if be skin his home advertisers and cut rutes for foreign ads ; Or, if lie start out by giviug a $3 puff for a ten-cent coinfi; Or, if lie start a paper because he has failed at everything else ; Then, indeed, hath he bitten off more than he can masticate, and his paper, beloved by the gods, will die young anil fresh. Mexico lias a herd law that seems , to give satisfaction everywhere. If one man’s stock depredates upon an other man’s land, whether it he grass or grain, the owner is notified, if known, to take away the stock, and if this is not done, the animal or ani mals are driven to the pound and ad vertised and sold. If an individual owns or leases land in that country he knows he will get to uso it, ami not be compelled to pay for pasturing other people’s stock. Hygienic pillows are now in vogue. Three form a full equipment for a bed, nf which one is filled with hops, a lecoud with pine needles, and a third witli marine moss. They are believed lo cure sleeplessness amt nervous dis orders. A lady in Fonda, N, Y., who is just ninety-two years old, is just learning lo play the piano. She says that a woman who can’t play some sort of an Instrument nowadays stands a pretty poor chance of getting married. Henry Lnbouchcro, M. P., is not • >nly one of the brightest men in Lon don, with an income of £10,000 a year from the Truth, but has a big share in I lie Daily News,, which makes an enormous income. I Odds and Eads, The Washington Hatchet describes Colonel IngerttoIlaB a man who spells God with a little gaud hunts all over creation to find a It big enough to honor the devil with. $1 —“Thief!” *50,000 — “Defaul ter!” flOO.OOO—“Whortagee!” *500, 000—“Canadian tourist!” *1,000,000 —“Brilliant financier!” A friend of John C. Knos says that John began life as a poor boy. His creditors are welcome to all tlie con solation they can derive from this. It may be true that “two is com pany and three’s a crowd,” but you would have considerable trouble con vincing a theatrical manager of the fact. Theo keeps a bearded old duenna, whose duty it is to write affectionate notes to tlie vealy youths who lose their beads over tiie actress, anil try to correspond with'lier. An Ohio girl, while out driving with a young man this week, got out of the buggy and killed herself with a pistol. He probably persisted in driving with both hands. Wife—“John, our coachman must go.” "But why, my dear? Our only daughter is married.” "Yes, but— John, I’m not so very old myself, you know 1” “You may speak,” said a fond mother, “about people having strength of min 1, but when it comes to strength of don’t mind, my son William surpasses everybody I ever knew.” A California man claims to have seen an animal half dog and half alli gator. We strongly suspect the same man saw two wives and two rolling pins when be got home that evening. “How are you getting along?” asked an old judge of a younger law yer. "Very well, thank you,” was the reply. “I got iny first case to day.” “Indeed 1” and what was it?” “A bookcase. At the club. Van Dyke—“And the dogcart don't belong to him, eh?” Browne—“No, borrowed. He's poor and only half in society.” — Van Dyke—“Julius Cresar! and I took the trouble to be civil to him.” We notice that there is a great deal more said in the papers about "pho tographing the sun” than about pho tographing the daughter. And the daughter generally makes the hand somest picture. A horse-ear conductor recently en gaged in a prize light out west and won after a desperate struggle of an hour and a half. His opponent se cured first blood, but the knight of the punch got all the knock downs. A Kansas City paper says: “It’s a cold day when the democrats get left.” This shows the divine dispen sation of Providence in bringing elec tion day in November. It’s generally quite chilly in that month. A poor insane man walks about the streets of New Orleans with a cornet in his hand. The pity which he arouses is caused not so much by his insanity alone as by the peculiarly pitiable manner in w hich it manifests itself. “And so you have been to Europe? Did you go to Switzerland ? and did you see the glaciers?” Mrs. Shoddy —“Oh, yes, we saw mechanics of ail kinds, but then, you know, I don’t take any interest in such vulgar per sons. “Boston lias an accomplished girl who can scream at a mouse in seven languages.” To Imrl seven languages at a mouse would he a gre it waste of dialects. It is very doubtful if the mouse would understand only one language. “No,” said the merchant, “I don't advertise now. I used to, but I got completely tired out waiting on cus tomers. Since 1 stopped that adver tisement I have had a continual vacation and have been able to dis charge two of my clerks.” It is announced that Mrs. Bclva Lockwood intends to have her cab inet made a la l'ompadour, cut bias, with seven rows of knife-pleating down \he front, and a jabot of Span ish lace, with ruching of Scotch mull and piuk bows around the neck. An agricultural journal prints “A Cure for Bark Lice.” If bark lice are attacked with cholera, or yellow fever or small-pox, or some other dangerous disease, a man is a fool to attempt to cure them, lie Blvould give them something to hasten their deuth. An Ohio farmer says that n mule can ho cured of kicking by catching hold of his leg while in the act. But when the unfortunate ojierator is sailing through the empyrean dome he probably wishes lie hadn’t inter fered with the inalienable rights and hereditary customs of the mule. “Young man,” said the professor, “you should not allow yourself to he guided altogether by vour own opin ions. You should defer to the opin ions of others.” Student—“But the poet says * ’tin madness to defer.’” l’rofessor—“True, hut the poet was Young when he suid that.” A Boston young lady has been pro posed to by means of a letter printed on the type-writer. Such cure to have it legible seems to have been entirely unnecessary on the part of the young man. Trust a g'rl to read a letter of proposal at sight, even if written in Sanskrit and a bn l hand writing. WigfUh Hut HentlMt. Tmproraptu definitions have often tiie merit of being amusing, what ever may be said as to their correct ness. “What on earth can tiiat mean?” asked Hicks of Thackeray, pointing to an inscription over a door way. ‘‘Mutual Loan Office.” “I don't know,” answered the novelist, unless it means that two men who have nothing agree to lend it to one another.” Said Lord Wellesley to Plunkct: “One of my aides-de-camp has written a personal narrative of his travels; pray, what is your defin ition of ‘personal?’” “Well, iny lord,” was Pliinket’B reply, “wo law yers always consider personal as op posed to real;” an explanation as suggestive as that of the London magistrate who interpreted a “house keeper" as meaning “a sort of a wife.” “Pray, my lord,” queried a gentleman of a judge, “what is the difference between common law and ei;uity?” “Very little in the end,’’ responded his lordship; “atcommon law you are none ior ai once; in equity you are not so easily disposed of. The former is a bullet which is instantaneously and charmingly ef fective: the latter an angler's hook, which plays with the victim before it kills him. Common law ig prussic acid; equity is laudanum.’’ An American contemplating setting a law-suit going, his solicitor said ho would undertake the matter for a contingent fee. Meeting Mr. Bur leigh soon afterward, the would-be litigant asked that gentleman what a contingent fee might he. “A contin gent fee,” quoth Mr. Burleigh, ‘‘is this—if the lawyer loses the case he gets nothing; if he wins it you get nothing." ‘‘Then I don’t get any thing win or lose?” said his ques tioner. “Well,” was the consolatory rejoiner, “that's about the size of a contingent fee.” So Brough was not very much out in defining a lawyer as a learned gentleman who rescues your estates from your enemies and keeps it himself. The Birthplace of Great Southerners A nicely worded paragrah is going the rounds of the press under the title of “Henry Clay’s Birthplace.” It calls it Ashland, Ivy., and treats it with pathos and feeling. The fact is Henry 1 lay w as not horn in Kentucky at all. | He was a Virginia boy who first saw the light in Hanover county, and did ! not. come to Kentucky until he was over It). The greatest men of both Kentucky and Tennessee have been born in other States. Ben Harden, the great orator of Kentucky, was born in Pennsylvania; George M. Bibb, Tyler’s Secretary of the Treas ury, was born in Virginia; and Henry Watterson, of the Courier-Journal, first saw light in Washington, D. ('. As to Tennessee, the matter is still worse. Before the war it.had hardly a man of national prominence who had been born within its borders. Presidents Jackson and Johnson were born in North Carolina, as was, also, J. K. Polk and H. L. White, who, it will be remembered, was a presiden tial candidate in the campaign of 1836. Parson Brownlow was born in Vir ginia, and came ’to Tennessee as a circuit riding Methodist preacher. Felix Grundy, a Virginian by birth, had made a reputation and become Chief Justice of Kentucky before be moved to Tennessee, and Horace Maynard, a Massachusetts college graduate, emigrated to Tennesseo, and started in life as a tutoh Aaion V. Brown, the law partner of James lv. Polk, and Postmaster-General un iter Buchanan, came into Tennessee from Virginia, at the ’age of 20, and Sam Houston, Governorof the State, Senator in Congress, and founder of I the Texas Republic, was a Virginian ! bv birth. The Tradition of The ‘‘Kone of Jar. tor,*' There is a tradition, dating from the period of the Crusades, respect ing a wild rose bush that had been seen near the spot in Bethlehem of our Lord's nativity. Marvelous tale* were told by returning pilgr ims con cerning it—to wit, tiia! its roses blomncd perennially, and that it“ thorns never stung. Il was called the Hose of Jerico, un i was pre served as a precious relic, in the churches. When thin tlov.tr was placed in a v.t • of hole water during Christmas night •ervl.v, il s.owly Opened it' p t.e< ! revived into a heathy and f.-'g an".' strangely sweet, at d then it returned to It faded condition. Tit" water used in this mysterious o, option was cod lo heal the nick. The first or Hie os"»», again, is r i to leu • been carried by the win i to the borders o; Jerico of where it took :!• 'tame. The Judge got home rather late the other evening, and found » young , fellow sitting on the sofa with the “sole daughter of his house and heart.” "Well, sir,” said the'judi cial gentleman ; “what are you doing here?” "I have come into court, Your Honor, for the defendant,” was the ready reply. Iniimrtant When you visitor lravc Nvw Yo 'k City, save bairgagc ami curri&ge hire, mid p j at tin* Graml "nion Hotel, opposite Grand (cl- j tml Depot. Elegant rooms, Inte l up at a f.ist of one ntillian dollars, reduced to >1 and up wards |H-r day. European plan. Elevator. Res taurant sunplird with the best. Hors? cars, s ages ami elevated railroad to all depot*. Fam ilies can live better for leas money ft’ the Grand Union Hotel than at a :iy other first-class hotel in the Atty, Jan 23-lyr WINTER STOCK ....OF.... NEW GOODS JUST OPENED AT A. D. LEMAIRE’S TWO-STORY NBW BRICK. CONSISTING OF EVERYTHING TO TIE FOUND in a General Merchandise Store. SELLING AT REDUCED PRICES. HEW GOODS! LOW PRICES!! Our good* aro not shelf-irurn. They aro direct from Importer's hands, consisting of CLOTHING, BOOTS AND SHOES, HATS AND CAPS Mining Implements, HARDWARE CROCKERY. CLASSWARE GEMS’ niiisiiura GOODS. GROCERIES .AND. PROVISIONS, DRY GOODS, ISJOTIOSZ'S &C. EXAMINE AND YOU WILL PURCHASE WS- Wo know yon can be pleased Business permanently located. Remember the Place! ma/*24-tf Obtained for moderate fees. Send model or drawing, we will advise free if cliarge;and Make No Chauue un less we obtain Patent. For circulars, terms, and references to actual clients in your own State or souuty, address C. A. SNOW & CO., Opposite Patent Office, Washington, D. C. ■’HEIRrS SPECIFIC,” _FOR.... riERVOUS DEBILITY, Seminal Weakness, Impotence, Fhys teal Debility, Loss of Manly lay er, Pi anatare Exhaustion. \ND THE MANY EVIL AND GLOOMY consequence* of early indiscretion, rids incomparable Great English Remedy httsulremiy ehiwved a world-wide reputation. It U infulli \«t in restoring lost vigor, whether from iinpru lv noe, si. knots, or old age. * w Kor vale b\ ail principle Druggist*; ask for ; take no other ; if not on sale, scud direct to us; will be mailed, meanly sea.el with full direction* on receipt of money . &4T Price, Wl per Package, or Six Package* tor $5. 8 ifficient to cure most cases. Address Wheeler & Co., K*W£YORK CITY, N. Y. FARMERS’ MILL PARADISE, NEVADA, Tins hew mill, with the latest Improved end best machinery, is u#w prepared to HU all orders for Flour, Shorts, .iXD. A full supply of which is kept constantly on hand by A. D. LIU AIRS. At Battle Mountain, Ner., FOR SALK AT Wholesale and Retail, C3?”Orders from a distance will receive prompt attention. K3T Addruss all order* and oommnnicattons to SCOTT A POWELL, _ Paradise, Nevada, Or A. D. LEM A IRE, Baltic Mountain, Nevada. Das Wasser ist fur Ox und Schwioin. Deni Menschem ^ab er Bier und Wein UNION BREWERY, BATTLE MOUNTAIN, NEVADA The undersigned having refitted the eld UNION BREWERY, and en gaged the services of a FIRST CLASS BREWER, is now prepared to furnish his customers and the pub lic in general with a good article of Draught or Bottled BEER (BOTTLED BEER A SPECIALTY Jt-fr-Saloons and families will do wel to give it a trial. Beer will bo deliv ered to customers in Battle Mountain and vicinity freo of charge, and is for sale by the gallon, quart or glass at the Brewery. MATT. J. STAHL, Prof. JanlUtf RAILROAD MEAT MARKET, BRTNSDEN BROS., Pkofbibtois. Having rented this old stand, we are now prepared to furnish the public with first-clasa BEEF, PORK, V ., CORNEO BEEF MUTTON, Which will be sold at tho lowest foe sible rates. The patronage of the public is respect fully solicited.