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The Lafayette advertiser. [volume] (Vermilionville [i.e. Lafayette], La.) 1865-19??, April 11, 1896, Morning, Image 3

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The Lafayette Advertiser
L1A .'AY"I:'ITI:, - IA I.1\ N.1.
A Telegralph Operator Tries to Hire a
Hlorne in Mexico.
"It's t range how contrary things gc
sotnetinles,' said a telegraph opexatior
who haLs tra;vel*l and seen many things
"'Son.e yIears back, whent' I was roaming
arotulnd in thlie southwest. I went do\''
In old h exieo with a man anamed ( lne
PLts. We didn't have any particular
blsinless. down there, but it was not
dittfficult. to get a jobt at telegraphing in
those da;L and we worked around fromz
1n1 place to another t. see the ('oun
"'We found the elinmate a:gree.ale and
S'eryt.hing lovely except the eatables.
The fact is, the eatables were all right.
too, but we couldn't get them. 'Tamales'
was the 'honly thing we eould say in
greaser language s. hen we w anted
something to eat, and tamales swas all
we could get. T'hese tuamiles that the
Mlexicans make, you know, are onue
eighth coru husk, one-eighth meat and
orln meal and the remainder red pepper
that tastes like eoncentrated extract ol
future punishment. Now. tamales are
good things by way of relish in small
',uantitics, but as a steadv diet they
pall on a person' sappetite, more or less.
hut, as I remarked, the only thin,, we
could call for was 'tamales.' That's
.iust to show that we couldn't be under
stood when it was desirable.
"'Well, one day we proposed taking a
ride and went. to a stable to engage some
horses. There were horses in plenty.
lut the fool people couldn't understand
that we wanted to hire them. Clements~
had a little red book ws ith some colnmmon
expressions in the greaser language for
ready reference, but it either wasn't
printd correctly or Clement% didn't
have the correct pronunciation, .or tlhe
stable folks didn't sabe his talk worth a
cent. Clements then tried a sort of
sign language and they became suspi
cious that he was crazy, and when he
attempted to saddle a horse they threat
(ened to shoot hinm.
"While Clements was in the midst of
these demonstrations a man dressed in
the height of Mexican style rode in.
Hlis sombrero and saddle carried enough
silver to buy a mine. lie entered the
courtyard, said a few words in Spanish
to an attendant, and, seating himself
near us. began rolling a cigarette. It o
,exed Clememnts to see how readily this
greaser could communicate with the
T,ople, while he couldn't make himself it
understood. t
.....'Look at that yellow-faced rustler!
See how easy it is for him to talk!' said
Clements. Hils experience had shown
him that there was no danger of being
understood by anyone but me. and he
spoke freely. *Perhaps that blamed
bow-legged horsethief can understand
nme.' he added. Then, turning to the
stranger and bowing deferentially,
Ciements pulled out his little red book,
a nd,following thetext with his finger,be
Ran to read in Spanish that he wanted a
horse. He had only begun when the
man who looked like a greaser said, in
good English:
"'I gather from what you have been
saying to your friend that you desire to
hire two horses. Am I correct?'
"He was correct, but Clements was so
frightened that some time elapsed be
fore he could answer and make a few
necessary explanations to the hidalgo.
who proved to be a Mexicanized Ameri
can who owned a mine down there.
"That was an instance where we were
understood when we didn't expect it."
--Washingaon Star.
re ar WAo a t Went Prepared
f. Euerkepeleg, ,
"I havn atways been afraid of a fire 1
in a hotel," said a traveler for a boot
and shoe house, "and on my very first I
trip provided myself with a knotted
rope 60 feet long. Anything like the r
smell of smoke always weakens me, I
and an. unusual noise in the night 1
brings me out of bed. One night there I
were four of us boys occupying two c
beds in a room in a southern hotel a
which had a crush of guests. Our room I
was on the Yourth story, and each one R
of us got our ropes before going to bed. |
We also went out into the hall and lo- g
cated the stairways, elevator, etc. t
"At one o'clock in the morning, with f
the rain pouring down and the night as a
(lark as awolf's throat, the hotel caught
"ire in the kitchen, and all the guests. c
were aroused. I have always felt proud h
of the coolness of our quartette. One b
man whipped the sheets off the two d
be4d tied them together and ran the ti
length of the hall and lowered himself u
Icown to the opening of the freight h
elevator. A second setzed his trunk n
and dragged it down one pair of stairs ri
and left it and then threw his coil of ti
rope out of the window, without stop- h
ping to fasten the end, and then ran
into the hall and into a room at the tar d
aend of it, and was found in a wardrobe
after the fire had been extinguished "
"And in your case?" was asked. TI
"Oh, I was very, very cool. I threw at
"p a window, made the hook of my xn
rop Last amnd slid down to'the street
'mid Ike jeers of the assembled popu- w(
"You mean cheers?"
"Not exactly. You see, I had only to in
eross the roof to another window to th
step out on the roof of a store level w
wlth the sill, and the assembled popu- g
cie couldn't understand why I should
!Ffef& to monkey with the rope and li
-ban the skin off the palms of my sel
h.ds till I was a eripple for six weqks. l
Simeve one impulsive Individual of
" e. me' a hero, but the rsat of the t4
:anau the daily papers spoke of sp
ýa ass, sand I think they hit the to
R*-Cinclnasti Trib pm
m e 4 , Of
is 5Zs,35*. 1?
UY Gt:URGE G. F.lR.,IIH.'i.
"I 'rce:o;i this triI, is a dlot\r irigh.
failaire," :.clatimtd tl louis Ilenley, ir
itaily, as hei sat uith his friend, 1)r.
D. Worrall, in their tent one night, after
a ten hours' stalk in the desolate re
Zion at the foot of the Hliiminlayas. "I
jeu te w gi ec it. utip a a hall job and
Smake tra:cks homeward."
"W Ve've :.een unlucky, that's all," re
turned Dr. Worrall "The arare yaks
Saboult, for .e' canme acrioss their 'spoor
to-day tip the lake. llalloo, Louis,
what's taunt thing?"
o Louis hlid pulled out his chronome
ter as he was speaking, and the doe
'or's eye chanced to catch the gewgaw
thiat dangled from the chain.
"This?" replied Louis, nonchalantly.
"Oh, it's a little present I had from
I'ollard before he left('alcutta. Neither
t aluabhle nor very ornamental, hut I
: keep it in memory of hint."
s The objt.ct which ])r. Worrall now
Sscruitinized with some degree of curi
11 tsity was a cotica.l-shapedt piece of
green jade, about an inch in length:
from the base of it projected a short
s &trip of tarnished metal, and through
.this metal a hole had been bored. l)r.
SWorrall looked long and carefully at
the axrticle.
I "Where did l'ollahrd get it ." h- asked,
a grave lisik on his face.
"Well, he came aeross it. in this very
neighborhood, I believe. Perhaps, I
ought to sayv-putting the fact into
plain Eunglish-he stole it."
"How tdid he become posscsed of ]
;t ?"
"'Oh. by some means or other lie se
:'retly obtained access to a IBrahbmin
templr,. in which an elaborately jew- (
eled image of Siva was enshrined. 'T'he
jade teeth of the idol were fixtdl into
their sockets with golden screws, andl
I'ollard, desirous of having a memento 11
of his hazardoust enterprise, broke one
of the teeth off, and carried it away s
with him. It was the act of an icono- s
clast., a vandal, but--"
"You don't mean to tell me," cried ii
Dr. Worrall. excitedly, "that this is the s
1'otorious Jlharat.ra tooth?"
"hNow you mention it, I recollect f,
that was the name of the temple-the ii
Itharatra temple. But why notori- re
"It appears that the R,hootaneese n
have a a;pecial regard for these teeth.
certain scores or inscriptions upon 1I
them being attributed to Brahma's t]
own hand. It wtas the doulde triangle
cut into the face of this piece of jade s,
that causled me to question you respect tc
ing it. A description of the missing ti:
tooth was circulated throughout the :r
district, the rajah of Wayslu offering ti
a substantial reward for its recovery. (1
If you value your comfort and rafety. re
Louis, I would advise you to get rid of st
the stone at the earliest opportunity. 1et
Many a fanatic would not count the de
cost if he could only obtain possession pe
of the tooth, and many who are not m
fanatics would have little scruple -e
about killing you for the sake of the po
reward." a
"I had no idea I was carrying such -
a dangerous article about with me," re- an
joined Louis, with a laugh. "'Here it
goes back into my pocket." n.
"Hark!" interposed the doctor, sud- "T
denly sitting up stiffly. "What was sh
He rose to his feet, strode past. the "T
tent pole, and lifted the 41ap of the til
tent. For a minute he looked keenly re:
out into the night, listening. Th
"I must have been mistakcn,"he said. th
returning. "I thought I heard stealthy ca,
footsteps in the grass. But there's no
body about."
"The wind among the leaves, that I
vas all," opined Louis, with a yawn. of
"I say, Worrall, I think I'll turn in. As
I'm dead beat."
ii TheA doctor ficlowed his comphnion's
example, and within half an honr the
re twain were deep in slumber. How lony
t Louis had slept he knew not before
st he awoke with a shiver, the cold night
' air beating full upon his face. And
te no wonder-for there, not a yard from
L, his head, the tent cloth was dangling
it loose. While he was dreazily debat
e ing the means by which the canvas
o could be refastened with the least
l amount of exertion to himself, he satw
I a hand thrust into the opening. Louis
e gazed fixedly; The cloth was cautious.
i. 'y raised, and now the moon's rays
- glistened upon a forearm which, pro
truded into the tent, swept gently
h from side to side, in an ever widening
s semi-circle.
t Louis rolled over noiselessly and
e clutched the groping limb with both
I his hands. The tug of war.was violent.
but brief, for Louis' fingers slipped
down his adversary's arm at if it were
the body of an eel. The vigor he had
1 used, thus unexpectedly released, shot
him backward upon Dr. Worrall, who,
alarmed at his friends halloos, had
I risen into a sitting posture. Before
they could "sort themselves out" the
n ould-be pilferer-for there could be
no doubt the intruder was upon plun
der bent-had utterly vanished into
space. Nor, although they at once
roused the inmates of the enp-their
Tindoo bearers, porters aid attend
ants--could the slightest trace of the
marauder be discovered.
Next morning, while the hunters
were imbibing their early breakfast,
their guide, a Bhootanese shikari,
Chuta Sen, came runing breathlessly
into camp. He had already been to
the top of an adjoining hill, from
whence he had seen a head of yaks
grazing in the valley beyoad.
Swallowing a hasty mev, the Eng
lishmen shouldered their weapons ad a
set off to the spot. Thee,. far be
low they could discern a .oen or so
of the wild oxen, mersbrau dots on
the plain, browsing placid upon the
sparse herbage. It b ueeessary
to exercise the utmost eak in ap- g
prosehing the herd, and .rmre was
accordingly shaped round > ummock
of the hill to leeward.this j.j
' the hnaters wiabln
Sinalin i out their animals, Dr. Wor
rall and Louis firedl to-gether. The
alarmed yaks broke up in di-order.
most of them stamn.peding up the :'I
ley. n hile three ,t ,iy --and one of the;;
h` evic ti tl. notlnfded badly-burst- a"may
ir- in the, opposite direction. ] )r. \\orratl
])r. followed by the tvo llindoo servant .
ter rushed pell-niell over the bo.l Iders ii
th- h11e hope of head:ig the larger heir.
at the neck of the hollw,\v, and so o:
nil getting another shot at them. I.ou.,
on the other hand, cl'cted to pursue
re- the bull he had I.otndtled. w hich, from
k5 its lauiort' d flight, he saw must soon
or drop of exhau\tion. I landing his gunCa
is, to ('hula Sea, and ordering t hat worthy
to keep close at his heels, he broke out
:e- into a run eastward.
'- "Look, sahib:" cried the shilari,
pLo Iinting. "Yaks make for the nu!
lah. We cut off corner this way."
ly. "Is this our path?" exclaimed Lou;·,
mi hesitating.
ier "Yes, saiib," returned ('hit-a Son.
wI ho, hamp red with the gun. had once
more taiken uip the rear. "Yaks soont
"w lxL5s below. Haste, sahib, haste!"
ri- Louis needed no urging. Down the
of steep he went--recklessly enough, con
hi sidering that but six feet of stony ledge
art separated him from the brink of a gull
'1 ::00 feet sheTer-over bowlders and tus
)r. socks of co"arse growth, where a slip
at of the foot would hale beena fat il.
Io;nn. down -- now leaping. nDow
d. scrambling on all fours--for fully fi-e
minutes. Then he stopped dead, with
rv blanched face. Before him and to his
I right yawnedl cavernous depths; on
to his left hand was the perpendicular
face of the mountain. The cliff path
f hadl ended.
"What do you mean by choosing
e- this route ?" cried L.ouis, angrily. "We
in can't get any farther. Let us go back,
v- or we shall miss the-"
ie As he spoke he turn( d wrathfuill.
o upon the shikari. The words chokedI
'I in his throat. Half ia dozen paces b,.
o hind him stood ('huta Sen-half smil
1e ing. half scornful, wholly self-pos
y sessted-thn loaded gun held at the"prc
- sent."
"F'eringhee," lie said, a metiallic rin' 1
d in his voice, "I want the tooth--the
e sacred tooth of Siva!"
"Ah!" ejaculated Louis, flinching be
't fore the black muzzle. "That's it, is
e it? So it was you who were prying
round the tent last, night.; perhaps It
was you, too, who attempted to rob us
e while we were asleep."
a.. "The tooth!" Tepeated (hurta Se,.
ri '(;ive me that and you go safe. If no, r
then I shoot and take it."
The bantering tones in which Chuto
Semn slxke told Louis that he had not I
to deal with a religious zealot--indeed.
the mere fact of the man's refraining v
from killing him without scruple made
that point sufliciently certain. No: f
clearly the. shikari had in his mind the
reward offered by the rajah to the're
storer of the purloined tooth. This ii
knowledge inspired Louis with some f,
degree of hope. It would be idle to ex
peet aid from Dr. Worrall, who at that a
moment was probably miles away; and e
yet Louis did not relish yielding up his h
possessions without even the show of
a struggle. Only one course remainedl
-he must temporize with the feilpow. ,
and if possible outwit him.
"Look here," he said, pulling the D
wedge of green jade from his pocket. cl
"The thing's of no value to me. You m
shall have it if you pat down that gun"."
"No, no," replied Chuta Sen, warily. li
"Throw it to my feet, so I can pick it bi
up. The sahib must not more till I
reach the top of the rocks, or I fie. if
There I cast the gun over the edge. and cl
then the sahib may catch me-if he to
"Very well." said Louis, biting his
lip. "Here it is."
The piece of jade dropped a couple on
of feet in front of the wily hillsman. ot
As he crooked his back in order to seize o
it, the Irun in his rirht hrndl . .... ...
sarily depressed for an istant, and
a that instant Louis had flung hims.
upon the bent figure. The weapon fi
with a clatter to the earth, and the tr
t men grnppled in fierce conflict..
To and fro they swayed in mad stri
inags, now on the varge of the diz
height, and anon close pressed again
the adamant face of the beetling crag
Suddenly the lithe shikari shook his
self free. With a snarl of hatred, ti
light of murder in his eyes, he rush(
afresh upon Louis with outstretcht
hands. The other sprang aside deft]
and Chuta Sen, unable to check h:
own impetus, was launched over tt
edge of the narrow platform into spa
There came the hiss of the falling bod
-a long-drawn wail-a sickening thu
--and silence.
Taking up his gun, his face pallic
his eyeswside with horror, Louis fire
into the air. After an interval l
slipped in another cartridge and fire
again. Soon he heard Dr. Worrall'
cries, and presently that gentlemar
with his attendants, appeared upon th
spot. Louis related what had occurre(t
"I was afraid of something of thi
sort," said the doctor, picking up th
jade tooth, which still lay where it hal
been flung. "Have you any furthe.
desire to retain this thing?"
"I never wish to set eyes on it again,
returned Louis, firmly. "I've hat
quite enough of it."
"'Then here it goes," and with thai
Dr. Worrall cast the "sacred tooth'
far out over the rocks; it fell with
splash into the foaming torrent at theii
base. "Now, we'll look for Chuta Sen'
body and carry it up to the nearest vil
lage. He stumbled over the cliff, thai
is all. You understand? At the same
time, Louis, in case ugly rumors should
arise, I think it would be well to ter
minate our hunting expedition at
And that is precisely what was done.
-Leslie's Pleasant Hours.
-The eyeball rests in a eu'hios of fat,
by which it is surrounded on every
side. When the system becomes great
Iy emeciated through disease th fat
is absorbed and the eye sinks tfrtbe
la_. the bead, thums gi? t
>\ -h:-
Homely Character Sketches from
the Rocky Creek Settlement.
all Uncle. Si:is (crosses thie Last l)itrh--Mart
*t M1i3'o. tihe *':ost Ables;"' Liar The
i iDeat iu Hli Shop Two I)ol
I larsn for u Fly.
If it eser colies to pass that o.i
Snoulht rule short on mtate(rial for pliits
S:!1 ]reacher;
ov and philoso
it icians-all
)Ut 3 i have got to
do is to batch
i0, your cart dowsn
i- into locky
S(reek, iand load
up andl drive
out. And then
for quaint anl
'¢L curiouls peo
0' ple-plain, old fashion, Anrerican peo
ple, who 'worship t(kil. and love their
he countxy, and serve their dtay and gen
n- eration as they blame please-I will
gi back the Rocky Creek settlemlent
ii n ai:nt the whole entire discovered
wIorld. tult land my money ao.; e;asy a
p ckii it up in the big road.
Over the L.ast Ditch.
01Old man Silas G;illumn---lnchl Silas,
it as inoot e. er3lody ssa.- on; at to call him
- is deatd airld gone now1 , but. he was a
ma n:: that had sonie quaint and pe
ar crion. t.s13-n of his own. In a gen
teral slay hle was a mighty good man, a
good neighbor and a good citzen. lie
had conic doss ii front a long line of
(;od-f'tarin, debt-ptl in, dram-drinkin,
demo.tratic Ipeolle. lie had lived and
Imoved and had his vwashin done in the
same sttlement somethin better than
80 years, and no nmal, livin or dead,
ever had anything serious to say
1- touchin Incle Sila.s, exceptin that he
Snas ruther precurious and dead sot on
his ways.
But there was one Farticlar pint in
' that good old man:'s life which I put
1 in to tell you about Every year th.
Lord sent for more t han 60 years Uncle 0
Silas had dtlg a ditch and cleared up a
* new ground. That was always the
first thing with him right after Christ
t mas. They tell mle that when he was
4 young and in his prime he use to some
tlmes pitch in and clear up whole acres a
of land. and maybe ciig a ditch half a
i. mile long at one spell. But in his o!d
days lie got so he would whittle hia h
P work dot; n considerable. Sometinmes h
lie wtoutld take in just a little skirt of
new 1groiund and dig a little ditch som,- H
wheres about the place. He always had b
more open land than he needed on the c(
farm, you understand. But that was P
only one of them pecurious ways that ti
Uncle Silas had. He had went on clear- I
in a little and ditchin alittleevery year at
for sixty odd years, and consequential. of
ly he was dead sot in that way. Anti i
after Christmas he use to say he never
could feel plum natural and right till tc
he tended to his reglar businesa
Two or three weeks ago it so came to hi
Iass that I went by the Gillum place, b
and I took notice that Uncle Silas was in
still doin business at the old stand.
Down in the woods paster he had
cleared up a little new ground not
much bigger than a garden spot, and A
out in the orchard he had dug ade
little ditch to dreene the water into the Ib
big road. he
It wouldnt be no ways strange to me he
if that good old man has made his last i
ekenrin and dug his last ditch: says I it.
to myself as I rid on towards home.
And then about the next news we got ga
from Uncle Silas a funeral was goint co
on over to his house. He had crossed of'
over the last ditch and went to the net
other land of light and sunshine anti he
flowers. the
The Best in HIls Shop.
But now when it comes to quaint and
II pecurious ways, old man Mart Mayo is
o the gonebyest most strangest card in
the whole pack. Mart is anatural-born
liar. Sometimes it raley seems to me
y like he couldn't tell the truth with a
it dead rest.
And the mainest wonderment to me
is that Mart knows he is a liar and don't
even try to lie out of that. When'yon
1 oucst catch him at it and pin him down
I in a close corner he will own up to it
like a man. Every now and then he
s will pass a good resolution with him
self, and swear by the livin and the
dead that he is going to quit lyin. But
he don't take out and quit, and some
I times I doubt right serious if he can
If it ever comes to pass that you
mI ought cross Murder creek bridge down
on the old Jackson Trail road you will
I remember a man by the name of Mart
-Mayo, and the way in which he got the
best of Andy Lucas. Old man Mart was I
goin to town one day, ridin his mule in
a sweepin gallop, and down there at
the bridge he met up with Andy Lucas I
and two of the Stribblin boys.
"We have jest been talkin about you,
Mart, as the slickest and most ablest
liar in the settlement." says Andy when a
Mart rid up, "and now we want you to
give us the very best one in your shop." n
"Taint no time for givin now, boys,"
says Mart. "and as for you, Andy Lucas,
you would better make your horse swap
ends and burn the wind for home. Your 8
wife has fell in a fit and she is now at a
the pint of death. i am now goin after a
the doctor." P
With that Mart lie struck off towarda
town in a gallop, whilst Andy he "
wheeled his horse like a top, put the
spurs to him and lit out for home. It 'e
was nine miles from there to the Lucas
place and Andy rid his horse at such a h
fast and furious lick till he was bell- o0
used and ntove up henoeforw*:ds for
ever. And by gracious, when Andy got
home his wife was out in the garden
plokin vegetables for dinner, sound alnd I
well as ever and singin "Mollie Put thea
ettle Oa" at the top of her voice.
W.iU, naturaly of course Andy
sl ;' tls' . Hewas o
rmw. rwrcfr-r~3 crs
right on to town and wanted to wmlrk
up a filt w ita Mart )lavo.
"Yo 'an't tlnrow o10 1:hrnt on Iw
m- fr tthi:. A.\ i ," - ,:,s s ohd man Mart.
"ou l: r; n, the troublde yotrtself,
which I can prt; e it by th,- Stribblin
rt ,bo . Y, u h,' ,( I t.as th itnOt, a )le.t
lhst int i th. "-itlemn h t, wthich (,te; t ,e])d!y
lno\w, 1 i.ht 0without anl> tellit: froht
I :t. s td )i toe ) ive ye tl t.' b(st onI 1
S;ud li c ,l d rfl nr 1 could."
So \rtly b- :u to statd up to t1h e la(.
anti take hi,- med(licine lkc a ~man. and
it wtas ,ix months before ith" could
I swap off the horse he rid from Murder
('reek bridge back home that lay.
.He Used Up Henry Clay.
"It's Ino use in talkin. 1Pufe. I'm
1 gn t qulit lyin." says old mtan Marc
to lni thlie nx\t time 1 saw him after
he sent .\ndy lueas back horse in stuch
a tremenlndous big hurry. "Lyin don't
do me no larticlar good. Jl]nft., and it
mought mlaybe do somebod( !rarm. '
have .now t1,,l my last lie ;:wl took
out and (tj:it. You can set that. down
in your noteb,.,k, and if I don't stanr!
t up to it I hope I will never live to vote
another detncratic ticket.
"Did I oemr tell you about the time
I wiped the ea"rth up with Iltnry Clay
in a politic.al a:.*yfication ?" says Mart.
in the very next, breath. "It was. back
there in (;torg y ife, fe, and in t;y young
days. when I was ai whole team and t
the do g under the Iwagon a:d a tar- i
bucket throwed in for good measure. t
And in regards to politics, I wore the 1
bell and toted the spurs over any man
that trod shoe leather in them p*rts.
"You IN ill recol!ect, IRufe, that Henry I
Clay was then the biggest mani amongst 0
the ishigs, and lie had come down into h
our beat to make a speech and hohl
a big political rallifications which at
that time all the whigs in the settle- ci
ment could set on the butt cut of one i
log and hit not full. Most everybody tI
in that country--even to the iwomen
and children-w'as Andy Jackson dem
ocrats, and at the meetin that day it 1
was left for mte to tote the democratic 01
end of the chunk. And by the shades ti
of Washington, when I got through at
with Henry there want so much as a it
grea-sy spot to tell where he. had stood.
I smote him under the fifth rib, an,l ea
basted himn gwine anti a comin, till he
jest naturally had to give up the fight
and quit. Put the bastin went on so tr
thick and so regular-hot stuff and a
heap of it-till finally at last, by in,
hokeys, he had to mount his nag and
leave the grounds. u1
"'The next day I got a letter from al
Henry, in which he told me if I wouldl
but only quit the democratic party and
come over on the right side he would s
put me through for vice president in 14
the followin campaign. But in re- 1
spondin back with my answer I writ
and told him I would not leave the
old family lick log for all the fat jobs
in the New Nited States." lit
So after that it is my private opinion o
that Mart Mayo will keep on tellin lies
until a tombstone takes the -ob off of
his hands. As a great and gifted liar aO
he can now beat the finest tombstone pla
in creation. wh
Two Dollars tor a Fly.
,t Everybody don't know why it is that
d Andy Lucas never did wade in very
deep in regards to the church and re
,, ligion. But me and him have always
been as thick as thieves at a circus, and
he has told me a heap of things "jest
Sbetween us gals," as he is wont to put
"Way back there in my young and
at gallin days, you understan, Rufe, I
It come durn nigh aittin forever weaned
tl off from r'ndin chui-eh." says Andy to
, me, in tellin of the story "It was in the
i heat and burden of sunitner time and
the weather was scandlous hot. A big
distracted meetin was goin on over at
Bark Log, and on Sunday 1 climbed
i into my storebought clothes and went
s t9 church with Miss Pinky Ann New
n ton. Well, Miss Pinky she was dressed
n clean out of sight that day, and I was
. puttin on a whole passle of dog my
m self. After the sermont the preacher
he called for money.
e "All them that will give five dollars
for the good work raise up your hands,'
says he, and he pulled three or four of
the amen corner brethren to that ex
"Now, all of them that are willin to
put two dollars out at interest on the
Lord's side, please raise your hands,"
says he.
"Now, mind you, Rule, me and Miss
Pinky Ann had waded in tolerable clost
to the amen corner in orderment to see
and be seen. And about that time a
blamed old fly lit on my nose and
tickled so I couldn't stand it. Somethin
jest naturally had to be did, and when
I raised my hand to bresh off the fly the
preacher thanked the Lord and slapped
me down for two dollars.
"And do you know, Rufe, he sized my
pile to a nat's heel? I had two dollars.
smooth and even, in halves and quar
ters, and I had put it down there in my
flanks where it would rattle as I walked,
and by gatlins he cleaned me up. Yout
know good and well I didn't have no
money to put out at interest, but there
I was, weedin of a wide row with Miss
Pinky Ann. and everybody lookin at us,
and I couldn't see no way to snake out.
So I went down into my pocket, rich t
and reckless like, and settled up like a
man, which at the same time it was like
payin taxes or sheddin eye teeth. s
Henceforwards after that I have al- c
ways took a back seat in church, whe'e r
I can bresh the flies off without buyim. y
'em at the rate of two dollars ahead." b
May the God of the hopeless and the a
helpless bless these quaint and pecuri- .
ous people. The world needs them in g
its business. Rrrrs SANDEas, I
His Favorite. f
Weary Raggles-Ever read any e!
Iisl ' stories? 0
WIsoser ig WFillle -h aw. N:
,it8 of him arr..
.i. + º g 1t
Fatur (;re':t uI in the ilai'rial
., i ti ll , 1(, rW.t
',t - t"., ;r : l , o t , , , _
'Li Iis l Ii
it\\h *. " I . f .
fr ?if Lii. t h o lr b of (\ th sL - 'tii te
tit ,til •L Of , 'Li i +mit " fb itos
tto r' ; fl' I, lll tt l 'L t lllll he lil Em.t it
t. - e it o r Iif tu i f-,ll. r>. i prh It.l
Jtout, :)):, the tihir.s f wItrf.l xe an
hesl ll0 i' r t t ithfll f t tthet . -rt iite f
ira t a iit. nc ltb" t,, f ,r F..t rotIl ,1i
ltiic i the I tarhro t iof hifil the most
ftni 1rr q it niflie, a ltlafe deroief
frio t tti tsed thl e r I 'e ' tan , Indians '
t h) ftll e ti: ireeiis 1.inia. The etnerio 4
ta. ,t .t . hive. if un't um r'v of th e
t.aItss io ('inheon. nl he ftw:st the w ine
of t1 tsi. i, , ,i.er.,:. she la u r ,een,
tlu irn iit h ifer hv it i ttn I Th,
't ..t " hit. '" rinfes inl Pt ertl- sw rte
said o , its mfer'itýs, and e'"-rird tih'
won trfutl nhr, to iomfie. -isafr ution
it l. ot" r . a tider thlos it titral' th
no1.4 of a -its'lhark,ar:d c,,lmin·gr.f t
a its lrotil al sts'oulc. .as. Cofld
rete ed h:t t1'" -en rality of "rie
Clt )])IT itp used it with great hinr tit
itt- Iof Ifinto itpor tite t-otta fr
to h p1t41 to: and tits hi odocfitd soa
unt prtOt Lice in Prote stnt mghilnds
tha inie of them refuged toi ail
ther stl Irt of it. iut Sir -oert 'I al
by sine.' it for intermitttent., and ts
1i7 tLouis XIV. p.trchased the secret
of m .und mtnde it a ftree gift to his
p-o e. ,oon after .Morton and Syden
ha the most eminent physicians of
cos Wbieen it r e'iamne an important
" eof Permian re\port, thei country
trih to conew:l Aht fact that tdhe tree
na also arowing in -New (;rtnada.
e olh-fashion.d uli thod of admin
ist itso alkl ois muerating thie"quilln "
of arko in le, hand the great tonitc in
th earl; part of this ecnturv was "bark
an ,ine." and as in then e latter days
it s been demonstrated to be directly
fa l to the bacillnt malariae, we can
ea ly understand what a boon it wa
to he "settlers" in the unirained and
f er-and-ague" regions of this coun
t, when new. At last, by the advance
of hemical skill. the sieret of extract
in| its alkaloids was found, and of
t1#se no less than 13 are known and
ut*d, and some of them produce a valu
ate medicine, at a less cost than
u.inine itself.
jd 0o great vas t1he de'mnd for it, and
id sq wasteful the method of gathering
in it{ that it icas easy to see that the origi
e_ nal sources of supply would be ex
rit haustcd, and attempts were made. to
be tlanslnant the trees to regions where
,b3 similar climiatic and topographical eon
cditions ga,'e promise of sauccess. Some
on [a these early attempts failed; but in
t 1854 the Dutch governn:0'nt undertook
of |o raise the trees in the Island of Java.
- and now they hate most prosperous
]e plantations; but the most extensive of
what may be called intelligently con
ducted plantations are to be found on
the slopes of the Ilima:ayas and in
at British Burmab. In South Africa the
ry bark is obtained by first stripping the
e-. trunk. then felling the tree; but under
ys English botanists in India a way is
id found of practically stripping the
st trunk and then surrounding it with
at moss, causing fresh bark to be pro
duced. The botanists have even found
id a way of rlaking the larl, fuller of the
I desirable alkaloids. 1W' rejoice' thatl
d u ich ia ,reri -: . t: , . ltr. -.a .
to fliter, ? rtl d l !;t s 1 s'-iiu dl'-r t un
to der l,,. of inr, Dinh tlt wrn: but,
: , , . , : ,rs et tl,:t :t re':::,!c . p
g SOUti Aitti i;a.
Lt It was the twant of qulnine that. has
,d sent nlouning into nImny French
it homes; and the letters gha ing the story
,- of malarial swamps and fcvetr-strielc:ea
d soldiers in Mladngascar is most 1grew
iS some reading, and it is said that the
r- Spanish general in Cuba cries out for
a hundreds of pounds of quinine, rather
than more ehot and shell. In one sense
a Germany may he said to be the modern
medicihe purveyor of the world. It
f was her chemists and doctors in the
last cent:ury who demonstrated the
ialue of the minerals, mercury, arsenim,
D antimony and sulphur; and now they
3 have planned a systematic attack on
* the vegetable kingdom. The Berlin
Pharmaceutical soeiteyhasestablished
a centrali office for extending the
world's knowledge of poisonous and
healing plants. and; they expect. to re
ceive reports from all parts of the
I world on "the botanic, ehemie. and
pharniacologienl discoveries in plants
of a healing or poisonous nature."-N.
Y. Independent.
A Woodsman of the Northwest.
A woodsmanel writes of his own tribe
as follows: "'le ~cears a Mlaekinawv
:,hirt. and as a rule. comes frohm MJich
igan, Swedeni, or Canada. The first
thing lie dles is to swamp, chop limbs,
knock off knots, and receive the bene
uiictions of the teamster, who wonders
how anything so awkward found its
way- so far t(hrogh life. After awhile
he learns to clhop, pull a saw, and flip
a cauthook. \When times are hard and
wages low, he goes to a camp and sticks
to work right. along; when times are
good and wages high lie can't content
himself in one place. ]lis'turkey'con
sists of a two o-bushel bag and some old
clothes. If French, he talks less in Feb
ruary than in any other month in the
year; still, he says all that can be said
in 28 days, and his under jaw is a near
approach to perpetual motion. I!
Scandinavian. he talks little, thinks
elow, minds his work, and never kick..
If Irish, he is likely to prove a synonym
for ambiguity and utility. The woods
man is valued according to the price
of lumber; when pine boards are .i!h,
nte is high, too."--Minneapolis yi!"
-The Freach colopy i
awumber 10,553, the
in the Uunis ot

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