Sugar planter. [volume] (West Baton Rouge [i.e. Port Allen, West Baton Rouge Parish, La.]) 1856-1925, July 04, 1856, Joker Edition, Image 3

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Sugar planter. [volume], July 04, 1856, Joker Edition, Image 3
About Sugar planter. [volume] (West Baton Rouge [i.e. Port Allen, West Baton Rouge Parish, La.]) 1856-1925

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Sugar planter. [volume] (West Baton Rouge [i.e. Port Allen, West Baton Rouge Parish, La.]), 04 July 1856. Chronicling America: Historic American Newspapers. Lib. of Congress. <https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn86079096/1856-07-04/ed-1/seq-3/>

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A Militia Officer's Address. G
git a tolm. ( "t.nl : .:'):t"n th ' wlutt h l n latll.. tll', I luJtap
o f t h e t, ai lr . \ h ,t t a l ek . i t g -r e . t1 " t l. , , ,. . -" . t h e
Ilan -w tr.--ji t brmn ,P y u r li h t toot into lin .. r;+gen t
lllike.-- antWr In a voice I f hItL'hL thutlle't-the
• t ,p iou darned chietrint , men : ,ltc apllau,, at
my heloq.nce' for yo?-u1' pt .me tt if you."l. Yes.
tll, Mlihitia '--Taket that :aay andi ther. allmt llnothIn
left. The Mlllitia i' the Inu.n and ghlzzt lof Ith coun
try. It tIcks. btlt., au nt bar. thte gat. ,f ' r-atio.,
anrd stan, .i .,nttni I ,1 the tilltet ratil rtI t ,, Ni iturtI'
domiui.n. Tih, relltlllic woulhl e a tti.erI l (co (iern
el itn.t ft (r the .lilit.a It keep the ardent .lfo ts
ofuilitar. flfuhgence in a glow ,of Itelandic f..rtority.
I'm attachredl to it mtr.lf:-I think it'. rich. The
systenm cta t Ie betteredl. Folk, call it a frce. I
dunttsee nothi. n ho laugh at in it.,it,.i pa llaguy
solemln piece oi f lishn,!es, n whe yhou 'Ome to hug d.,U
t, t.he nake| trenlstl ont it.
Tain't every bod thautcan put on the regimentaltie
and look old Mar. the til of at r, in the lace, Nwih
a dctidedtl touclh of Juliat- Junian trutust ('rs'ther
throiwn in tur oi.t-t. No -cl ee : There aint a big
ier or m,,re inmp [tant 1lle.r atloat than a lto Militia
. iver all riggeo in tull tralto .ternll nt of glory, with
'trial, to hi. breecherh-,li -. e.. ett.. pald I oi hLth
Si, er-, tr Ina buttllt fiom heoad ito oot, ler
Rlar, aihoi'a in the fail. of hi. coat. a ctip and |plutl
on hi. headl d n a ,Iraw'-l -worl i. hin hande.
S;ich a a1 · t iiin ,tito mk. a a nl~tn mi.att and wo
han thitk .tt thle ot f tli. apweie. You better beliet.e
it. nw. mind I [ell er.
I hlieve the prtlrict-iont delirium of thii entinatdt
reIpultlic i cent lt. T itn it, Militia; t can't slt lal t with
ut l.t. It 1 proud iimotto i., . tlatiLded we lot land, iY"ft
nld ~r fall !
ipi chlarin" t putt 1,' all out --(inneral 1% .a.
ington ti'totnged to the Mil.na. so dlid cipio African..
ru.:; a did iotmvpatte, and -oolt 1.
I btheve of all out d.nr- -haulh) burnt through the
;-araf'truailye ot the aoimat onntoamy. and ijlle dow n
the greas.ed plank ofancai tral delinqu.tney kerslitap
into the broad aavannaro of thi- milin' lando of mnlk
andt honev, that nothia' antic coA..l put em out but
th- 1lt tlia.
I' t tr, a fact. Three thter- for thte Miltia in
generalt tthe thJ!th lt.teint in ptartickler. .ozeru I
growua I aorn. '1
Wt11tar' .Meriko. Kalifornikt and ioreg.',a Who's
nar.ea on 'em? The mi tat iin it:gtitnt ,lan thtrash
the life out of that lricii anyt moolrniin' afore break
fa-t iar motto i" Liberty ana I death ' now aid
torever ' tine and inoeIartable' "thWora .cr ,etas
and down oitth Texaco I Lelt lick her.
PAN OF GRAVY -" Ita a l: a-a i .hrleks a hal
nak,,, inlaat of ahout ei¢Ihteen months lhi.
"Wiat'a them titer wit toama't. tiweet yittle ducky?"
say. It- affectnlHate mnther, while she presse, it to
her boom. anl the young ,arpent in return digs its
nalens in hter fwe.
SPliar den. tmissis. I know what little maasa Itim
want."" erclaille.l the cherub'a rtoloreo nurse.
'Y",,u bla.tck husiv why ,tn't you tell in. then ?'
and the infourratet mother g;ives li)th adtouse in the
chops with her shoe.
" Whit.It wants to put his foot in dat dar pan ob
trarvy N'ts on de harft" whimpers the unfortunate
W\l.11I. and why don't von bring it here. vou aegra
vatint rt,'r rolu. replies tht' bawling viOng ate.
Iuanh brings the gra vy. and little Jim louts hi.
1tre, tet in the pan. tlanhing the. mtlkwarm .rea-ea
abltt its sweet little shanks. to the infinite delittht of
it. n tither. who tentderl r e'clail,: : l" id mal lia'.
vit, IlhnllO~1 want lt pIt its teent-weenyt.o-ftie. in
tit, gnrav. It shall pnalle in the pan a" longa at s it
choo.eyiwo,.meys, alnd then shall have its proty rel I
frork on and Ito and sree its patpy-yapply "
lla'.elors take consolati-on.
S M 'gmirino has a oiarl, porter. This chap re-a
turned from the p~.t olti'," the other day with Mug
gin's papers. and informed that intlivilual, that there
w.o a letter in the post oflice that he coulnlu't get.
'" 'ltlh!u't get it; why couldn't you get it, you
there's fire cents to pay on it."
-, Whr didn t you pay forlit?" asked Huggins, with
Indignation.
" I hadn't cent enough '" replied tile urchin, grin.
nine arnllvr.
You fool !" said Muggin,. storming. " here take
this live cents and get that letter in little less than
no timen "'
N i,,-. I tell you, replied the fellow, they won't
let mne hI ,ve it."
" The dickens they won't-I'd like to know the
t-' cl'ka. ." replied the fellow. looking nack to see I
that the doolsr was topen. bkase Le ldter tuanta for
The hap retrealted from the room suddenly, while
on ink-.ta.t folltwed his noggin, at a speed of about
t(ittRITRttR LADY11.-Y-Q, vour m,,ther is :ert poor.
N/"'p, I,.-- -he, :a that' 'She votl to kiep a
pea l r't taold once, Lat ieL took a cosnterfeht one do'
ltr t-,.. as ft.,2 d I
Granny Picrze dis.m.s ng Ba-dog CIamp:oa.
AltiumA, or the Gentle Fawn,
as Rho appeua. (n the olh whillU of - IJVaI.bunii
Amev acirusandIndan mpith-tte.
S"o .Il. Fo.I NctRI.E.--T.The veteran "' ft nh an
t.U.un'l-, that ,on. d the "Trinin, ý'f SAho.i. fr .\Yur.s"
i- rera. to recetve prohat.oner.. T-timntllall are to
bt ntl in. anl tl,.' callndidate are to atted o aul al b
pointe oo day t~ unilergo an examination
]'uni'h ,t'raly aproves of the in| tiLtut:m : : an}t 1 4 f
order to turtheL r it, ro, ct' llnt ap Itt,tO , I; , p -
Ui natiolln all r. which' i- to b+e furni.hIwdi to a illk ,
c 1t.. It.-tit' lnnills o sis it u lnt only to ther 1 t, ol0.
of tli,.e w.o isy rhr-co-i proh.aton.r-s, but t, all
wsho mnay h. itrustei . with the guiit.uspnhip of thel
risin' ge-uerUton.
"L. :-ta:e .our ac.tlaintance' with the " al ,h
your opliniol a to th." dle:rabiht ofl reftrln tn to L. n
in 'asle No fractinusn.e'.
2. In case of a chill Iprtinarinuy l'ur-fuins t.
go t., s.lp. give the examiner your o.1-a of the prper
tr.lattlent.l aull whether an imitation "Goblin' ai
tGodflrey*. CorstiaLla in yuurjudtment, the preterttable
WIt oritic.
"S. At what period ofal difference between your
self and your elacharge.l. d Ia ntroduce the name of
"The Horrid BlRhk Man in the (Ill?'e
-4. In eventofa youthful party makl inquir
ers after its papa. or mamas, do you apprisen l thatthe
par.nt in qmestion is gone to "Itlohorty.obooty to
share the Monkeys.' or what other information do
yon supply ? *
3. What amoutt of gold hobhy-horsest diamond
nl1oe , alol hlIan. ilver new.notthin -to-put-trould its
neck. dI,,ou promiscea 'hilt -when your ship ,'ttletis
khomrt.' tt what date do sou assign to that fP.at in
ta itgatiottn ?
"t. 'SppOing thereio reasonalhleground for think
ingf tthat iu infant erie. eu apin i runin irulnn ing into t
itt d, you alopt the prevalent o-lief that tithe qtoedit t
relief is causedl by agoold lap tu nthe ntTlltecdt re;ioniI
"7.I I- it yur ,pntiont that any pIrotne which will
taken ea .l-l 1si.'tly out of the room, or to Ibet, imay
eon.sctentatl,-jo hbe made. and that the only promit e
wh aT.iit ich s e redeemed i. one of castigati'onl.
",. Io yoni r--'omentl tribe or threat a. the h,-.t
means (itf presntittng a chiill frm telling it smama that
yo-r betau coin came to tea. and stopped tosnup a <
l'hee are preonant questions, and worthy the at.
tnltnn of .r'.,, as well as turse., - h.ie and eloe
mtht.l " k aid ka tllrri it.n t" hi. itsone Lfinie morrIing.
s.! hdl this mornin." rp, hel tilil. withan ntha- Iu
sitastic gleam in 1,so eyk-.
"ItAh what ,. it my liarling ?"and hie father'shand
ran thig,.h his oflTprits culr s.
" iWhy. I walloped Jack E.tward: till he velled like .
thuntler : yon ahuuld have just ear heard him hollow
dad."
I-'ia" looked unhappy, while he explainest that the
precept did not imply a case like that, and concluded
mildliy with :
" Youhoult not ha]e done thtat my chill."
S'Then hed a walloped me'." retort,-t Bill.
Itetter." expsistulatet the sire, -f-r you to have
fledt fronm tlhe wrath to come.'
" Yeo. hut," arg..'d till. by way of a final clincher,
I lack can run twie as faot as I can.'
SThe good man stighedt, sent to his attdy, to,.k up a
pen. noat lnleavore'l to cotpose hitmself on a sermonu
res.nciling Iract.,e with preept.
. -I Tl. w, i "L that f i, s fr osm '-o at."rs" m-lth. -,
hatoe Ior, t'k a up .a.. .traycLc tJ the e that hung
oi5 hia 1.y,
A Oade
l. je.i"tcd bi the rc.eat ot a preaunt of a Iazn.uut
+ttin of gs. iund n tu ui the thei tweuty.aight ou UrgU..
Tune Ithe saue ru Jerden.
to tun '. oupearior stun ! lately dug
t n ,ut ithe rich $ile, the yealii, sile
nill tltranplartetil in it waggil i pretumllt
iiatlthin ii'rtctr. froh .stn,. valuable tiuorrc,
No licr tIlt li-idt su it but wun Illtlall-a
,""J Klunglianitt gritb if rle -
ltt jrdelun t.; a hard rode to trail, i presuue,
liltu it i,, , tI hit ;. t,,utt fi t - tun.
I u.~ , th , it i It tuuIlllll u.':trl It('h , rentl it
itf ol" ' tt\ , i11 " i ll-ttul lll u - uik-:pk , tli a elU
t t,, tre w;tk;, i grt :t nint.-d kwt.
1. at ' . tIlt :Itu,| i pr,"l tllu , !hie ,L!t. ," "hapt
k ltl titt t.tlu -tun too het t it ,i
or Je't ,t a Iea hlarl rtat tt ti .tl t i lpresun ,
TI n rle ,n g. ltcr-tu t lunu tnl Ltn it rilll
itt . liikt rI t rate lt u n i tnllltll , ill thI k
atli t Iti "tl . d-ilt ut.d i it Ill u to i othin
it n-l:tri~-lit till. t riffe. il I ,', kelt,.l ,kt th,, titll,.
aritl ,wh n i t.l al terd IllIt- , t lltllltt i II
e:f t ur tj ,-tl ktlr'e hlilu ttit' t it u i urjt
forl jie-tio- it l chad rtod to travll e ivp,- t.
c I. 1 1 tt u ure. it l Itu. l i r.t.tu rine c.-tu
i lo d .It " fIt| i rlt li l t alt wer
u " the pro,,er tlirlt t , hrite inemnrntee
o l ,n : ,. whi t .h h l.) . t | pa- td it lonom t ilt ago.
r t tit r" t intnr '
The Jokers Side Pocket.
*g TIh. flltw h "1 t ok it a ca ll" ti .rught it
back again when -Ll:h heatel
elail- ]'h,. t .u !,, a .! , whona. rarri,, 11av 1,v her
g t f-Th, I A thein wah behl ) the im e. oses
to gett Ill fr,,t
t- ' 'leae exchainn e " a- th.e ir;tter .,a 1 whI n
he ,.erel ls heart t a, l itth. dl I
4Se The,' u,,un: ;iIt i mh., rantiera: r. a. finer fEln ,
ha. :L etn ! , l l '.i t rere' t lh"r , Illll:ll.l : .t l r ,I tt CIll
4i - I'h, :a wlth.. t,,,k t it .r granted, fhul it
o r "ar tart.re want, to kn ow lit,- ] l'ay
of at nal atc attittatilt.
o" Ilitedl Anerican--a Yankee ant his wife
Sy`- the talay who. to*.k a f-tieh tn her iate " .aid
she preterted to hate a tlitch in tie hole of hrr
stocking.
I The lady who fell back on her dignity, can..
iear breaklon it.
.- The man who brared the storm of ad. emritl
lid it with an "" umbrella."
4I The two teighbors who fell out, got in again.
aW" .al. ifrryu n 'ent lovemerthr thi :tanaI if
,u 1do love men antd ,tn't like to thay thit,, -.iuetth
my han-l," Sal -queethze.l rk
3 The fiellow e ho tried to get up a concert with
the hanil tof his hat,. i- thIe .ame genius who, a few
we'eks since l.lyed uplou tile affections of an uptown
, Thre Yankee whowat lying at ,Ith pointofdeath,
has a hilttledt it off with hin jack-knife.
" t You .a- . ya Mra. .T,one,. that thIe prisoner atah
bed tie ieceasat., Was it inthethorax oralitmtni "
"" Nary one-in a-irret fight-I seed it with tny
own tbb-.,al r,e. "'
TIhat 11 dio tarm .,tanut aside and tmake roont.
j hl" Hall,,. Tom, . iti's death on waood. ]td you
,ever -el him .as. `" No. btut I saw him re. lia !
Ihe ' l at', nothitng saw hitim ser. Saw. lt hat
yu got to Iay n tow'" Why. di--,tat if vau Saw
him se. saw. at I -aw bi sent. the. t htmut tr a atUjty
nigger."' 'luln, I asrt ou wallt to rul a saw t,.
4g'" .1I ty at Pihoal out West. when 'altled out to
reclte his b.-on inl hittorrr. was ankeI : Wtthatia the
G;erman Diet cottlltitt ,of?" Theo'.y replied: -sour
krout. schlnap-, largter beer, anti nix comerounche."
Boy promoted instanter.
4'A A diffident lover going to the town clerk to re
I quet him to ptublisa tth bannit t f matnimony, faunt
hIm at work alone in the middle. a ten acrefield. and
asking hint to step aside as he had someahing for hba
private ar.
a At Syracuse. . Y.. a few lay. ago. the lnuiana
eceived their yearlvin itallment fromn the State. ttmn
old "native " presented hintlelfand equaw, anti seen
teen children. HIls alare, at fite dollars ia head. nna
ninety-five dollars, and at he recei vel his portin. hI
I remarked, ' ,r1 get ituundrevl olulhlis Itxt year."
i LTe; AND ST.,Nls-- F-ilr-ai na'.t I;e. nill
thev '" mnttoercd a .e,,I centle tanu tig re t,, a
I lamp ptnt t "Itllt:. p I-hev to t but I st- a
tglg.'r ans ct.'t scan, anU lw "

Sugar planter. [volume], July 04, 1856, Joker Edition, Image 3
About Sugar planter. [volume] (West Baton Rouge [i.e. Port Allen, West Baton Rouge Parish, La.]) 1856-1925

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Sugar planter. [volume], July 04, 1856, Joker Edition, Image 3 About Sugar planter. [volume] (West Baton Rouge [i.e. Port Allen, West Baton Rouge Parish, La.]) 1856-1925

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Sugar planter. [volume], July 04, 1856, Joker Edition, Image 3
About Sugar planter. [volume] (West Baton Rouge [i.e. Port Allen, West Baton Rouge Parish, La.]) 1856-1925