By a curious coincidence the num
ber of lives lost at sea during 1896 in
British merchant ships is returned as
1897.
The reading of gas meters by the
school children is referred to by the
New York Journal as the introduction
jf fiction iu the public schools.
Governor Mount of Indiana, has in
augurated a movement for teaching
the science of agriculture in the pub
lic schools. He says: "Thousands of
dollars are annually expended in re
search among Greek and Latin roots,
and comparatively nothing is expended
in telling how to translate through
planted roots the elements of soil fer
tility into abundant harvests and de
licious fruits."
Only seven per cent, of those per
sons who entered the Klondike region
during the past year have been able
to earn a living; no new discoveries
of placers have been made during the
eight months preceding November 2
lust; all old claims have been taken
up; there is no chance for employment
for any large number of people in any
capacity; there is not now, nor likely
to be within twelve months, any ade
quate meaus of supplying food and
shelter for the people now in Alaska
or in the northwest territory, and the
lawless characters are banding to
gether for the purpose of robbery—
such are the reports received by
special courier from Captain Bay, the
representative of the war department
at Dawson City. And yet a rush has
already been begun for that country,
where there is nothing to ea% no
work to do, and no security for life or
property.
It is a curious fact that the reten
tion of McLeavy Brown in charge of
the customs service of Korea and the
checkmating of the plans of Alexieff,
the Russian who had been chosen to
oust the British official, was due to au
English woman living in San Fran
cisco. She is Mrs. Emma Endres,
correspondent of the London Times.
Alexieff came through New York and
Washington without attracting atten
tion, but when he reached San Fran
cisco Mrs. Endres found his name in
the personal columns of the papers.
She knew his position as Bussiau finan
cial agent, and promptly cabled the
fact to the Times that lie was iu San
Francisco, and had secured passage
to Yokohama and from thereto Korea.
The fact that he came secretly by this
roundabout way excited her suspi
cions, and she suggested investiga
tion. The Times conveyed the news
to the government,and thus by liberal
use of the cable Great Britain was
able to checkmate the Russian's de
sign of ousting McLeavy Brown.
There can be no doubt of the fact
that great alarm exists in the public
mind of Great Britain over the rapidly
growing industrial prestige of the
United States. One of the most con
servative of British journals, The
London Economist, Recounts for the
marked falling oft' in exports from
that country during the past year on
the ground that American competi
tion is yearly becoming more danger
ous to the interests of Great Britain.
While recognizing the harmful effects
of the Indian famine and other dis
turbing influences this representative
newspaper observes: "Yet we attach
more importance still to a new factor
which has made itself very manifest
during the past twelve months—we
refer to the competition of American
iron both at home and abroad. Twelve
months ago this competition was felt,
but only to a limited extent, and it
was generally assumed that it was due
to the exceptional depression which
was experienced in the United States,
and that so soon as this had passed
away prices in America would rise to
such a point as would make it un
profitable to continue shipments.
The total exports from the United
States, which in 1896 were about 100,-
000 tons, are estimated to reach over
500,000 tons in 1897. The principal
items are pig iron and steel rails.
The former comes mainly from the
state of Alabama anil is shipped from
southern ports in cotton ships. Being
able to carry iron in addition to a full
cargo of cotton, it is taken at a com
paratively low rate of freight, and in
this way it can be laid down at a price
to compete with pig iron of British
production. Steel rails have been
shipped largely to Canada, Mexico,
India, Australia and Japan, and have
come into direct competition with
British manufacturers." What the
London Economist is thus candid
enough to admit, other discerning
newspapers of Great Britain cannot
be slow to recognize. There is no
country on the globe which can com
pare with the United States in the in
dustrial strides which it has made
during the wast few years.
Great Britain has forty-nine vessels
ready for business in the far East
whenever there is anything for them
to do.
The sudden changes of climate en
countered by soldiers when troops are
moved from one quarter of the world to
(mother are estimated as increasing the
annual mortality of Europe by 50,000
men.
Le Matin of Paris states that there
exists in France exactly 71,200 Jews
in a population of nearly 38,000,000.
These Jews are divided as follows:
Paris 42,000; Bordeaux, 3000; along
the eastern frontier, 19,000, making a
total of 64,000. The remaining 7200
are scattered all over the territory.
The active capital of France is esti
mated at SI 6,000,000,000. Of this,
According to Le Matin, the Jews pos
sess $-1,000,000,000.
Poor old China is slowly but surely
breaking up, says a writer, and the
nations of Europe are scrambling for
the pieces. It is the oldest govern
ment in the world, but its people are
so superstitious, nnd they have been
oppressed for so many years by ruth
less rulers that they have no spirit
left to fight. Japan beat them in the
war of a few years ago and took a big
slice of their territory. Then Bussia
came and seized on a seaport. Eng
land has had a foothold at Hong Kong
for many years, and only a few weeks
ago the Germans lauded and seized
another seaport. France is thinking
about getting possession of Formosa,
and Japan will no doubt -wish to in
crease her share. In the meantime
the emperor of China, who thinks he
is the son of heaven, and the ruler of
the whole world, dares protest only
feebly. No doubt all of our boys and
girls will live to see China as a nation
wiped oft' the map. We can't help
feeling sorry that a once great nation
should thus disappear, and yet every
one knows that its people never will
make progress until they come under
the influeuce and control of the more
civilized nations of the enrth.
The incidents in the trial of M.
Zola in Paris ought togo far toward
explaining why Frenchmen write such
remarkable books about America.
If these incidents prove anything,they
prove that Frenchmen are radically
different from Americans in every con
ceivable way. For that reason French
men iind it difficult to understand ns,
our manners and our customs, just as
we find it diffiult to comprehend them
and theirs. All over this coun
try, it is safe to say, people are won
dering how it is possible that such
things could occur at a trial of na
tional importance iu ono of the lead
ing capitals of the world. Certainly
nowhere in America, not even in the
remotest frontier towns, could such n
spectacle be seen as a body of lawyers
going to a court to create a disturb
ance as two hundred barristers, in
wigs and gowns, did in Paris. And if
anything even faintly resembling that
incident should occur in America, the
Parisian newspapers would be the
first to say that nothing better could
be expected of a horde of ignorant
barbarians like us. Yet the thing
happened in one of the most vener
able aud cultivated centres of modern
Europe.
The public has loug been familiar
with laws which are called dead let
ters. They have been statutes whict
were enacted long in the past, under
conditions that have ceased to exist,
and which gradually fell into "innoc
uous desuetude," until at last few
people knew of their existence.
Modern methods of legistation are de
veloping a new kind of dead letter.
A bill is introduced which goes
through all the stages to enactment as
though it were designed to be a real
law, but it turns out afterwards that
the legislators never took it seriously,
and it was passed only to oblige some
body or comply with some request. <
In his annual message to the Legisla
ture, Governor Wolcott of Massachu
setts suggests that "it may fairly be
considered whether legislation pre
scribing after some future date a uni
form width of tire for the wheels of all
vehicles carrying heavy loads would
not tend to diminish tha great cost of
maintaining highways alike to the
commonwealth and to cities and
towns." The Hartford Times charac
terizes this recommendation as per
fectly but says it will
make some people who know what
has happened in Connecticut smile.
What has happened is this: "A wide
tire law was passed in 1895, has beeu
steadily ignored, and so far as we are
aware, there has never been a prose
cution under it, or an attempt to have
one brought." In other words, a new
law becomes a dead letter at once,
and nobody sees anything strange
about the development.
THE ROAD.
Pray, wlittlier leads tho road, fair heart?
Say, whither leads the road?
Across a rill, around a hill,
Beside a dell whore rivers start,
Where bending nut-trees shed their load-
Ob, thither leads the road, dear heart,
Oh, thither leads the road.
What matter where the road may lead,
So thou and I together go?
Companionship is nil our need,
Divisif \ all our w>e.
■The pinr-tree tall on yonder hill
For years has watched '.he passer-byj
t?hen he is dust we shall be still
Together, thou atJ I.
How hushed tee afternoon! I dare
Not whisper love, but send the thought
in spee-.-nless message. All the air
Is Silence' 'hrall is caught.
Oh. th«ss are Ood-reared trees! How soft
The wind-dreams round their tall heads
creep,
Tho drowsy leaves that doze aloft
Stir like a child in sleep.
Young Autnmn's Are begins to burn
The brands to hurl at Winter's brow;
The sun-wooed leaves sigh low, and turn
To crimson on the bough.
Pray, whither leads the road, fair heart?
Say, whither leads the road?
Across a rill, around a hill,
Beside a dell where rivers start,
Where bending nut-trees shed their load—
Oh. thither lead the road, my heart.
Oh, thither leads the road.
—John Macyin The Chap-Book.
] fl Siolenj'aDßage. j
From a yellow, faded pamphlet that
lay for years on a bookshelf in an old
fashioned farmhouse in Tynedale in
the north of England, the story given
below is taken.
William Tarbot was a lawyer at
Hexham, in the north of England.
Having to attend the assizes at Aln
wick and probably spend some days
there and Mrs. Tarbot's parents resid
ing eight miles from that place, Mr.
Tarbot arranged that his wife and their
daughter, a girl of 16, should accom
pany him and stay with their relatives
until he was ready to return home.
The family traveled oil horseback, as
was customary among country people
in those days, and reached the abode
of Mr. and Mrs. Norman, the wife's
pareuts, after a pleasant ride of a few
hours. Mr. and Mrs. Norman were
plain, old-fashioned people, owning
their own farm and accounted wealthy.
The next morning Mr. Tarbot rode on
to Alnwick and was soon over head
and ears in business.
On the lust day of the court one
Wray of Bamborough paid over to Mr.
Tarbot 2350 pounds in bank of Eng
land notes in settlement of a suit.
Wray had the money in a brown paper
parcel, which ho opened in Tarb.it's
bedroom in the inn where they were
both staying. The two men counted ;
the money, anil Wray wrapped it up
in the same way in which lie had pro
duced it and laid the package on the
table, at the same time saying:
"Now, Tarbot, you should stand
something, so ring the bell."
"Why, of course I will, with pleas
ure," Tarbot said, and thereupon
Wray playfully turned him toward the
bell pull, which hung by the side of :
the mantelpiece.
After the men had drunk together
they parted with mutual expressions
of good feeling, Tarbot putting the
package into his pocket buttoning his
coat over it. An hour later ho changed
his for a traveling one and la <l
th« package 011 a chair by a window,
leaving it there whiie he went out
upon the gallery and called the boots
to bring him his sad lie hags, which
he had been cleaning. Having st »wed
iwav his things in the bags,he put on
his traveling coat, placed tho package
in his inside pocket and buttoned the
coat over his breast Then he mounted
his horse and started for the dwelling
of his father-in-law.
It was an unusually hot day in Sep
tember and a thunderstorm was rag
ing over the Grampians. Fearing that
he might be hindered by the swelling
stream if he attempted to ford it, he
rode two or three miles out of his way
to cross it by a bridge. It was well
he did so, for, thougn he rode right !
into the. storm and was wet to the skin,
he got 011 the safe side of the water,
and the rest of his road was unob
structed. Nevertheless so heavy was ;
the storm that 110 took refuge in a
smithy on the outskirts of a hamlet
and waited there until the blast had
spent itself. When he reached Squire
Norman's dwelling, it was past 9. A
roasting tire soon tried his clothes and |
a hearty supper speedily put him to
right internally. As he sat by *he
hearth smoking the s<piire said:
"We have a curious visitor here to
night—not here exactly either, as you'll
Bee. When the storm was at its height,
a tall, gaunt man, dressed like a
drover, came here for shelter. We
gave him all he could eat and drink,
and he is now asleep, I suppose, in
the hayloft. He told us a very strange
story. He said he had been east with
a drove of cattle and was returning
afoot when the rain caught him. He
managed with some difficulty to ford
the stream, and was making his way
along the bank when he he.u d a cry
for help. It turned out, so far as tie
could learn, that a man, in attempting
to cross, had lost his footing and was
clinging desperately to the exjosed
roots of a tree, while the rushing
flood was too strong for him to resist
so as to get a hold of the root or any
thing else with his feet. It was im
possible for the drover to reach him,
and he shouted that fact across the
flood. Then the man cried:
"I have a package of money here
which will be washed away if I lose
my grip. If you'll take care of it for
me, I'll share it with you.'
"'Throw it this way,' the drover
said 'I am John Cotter and you can
hear of me at the Green Man at
Carlisle HUV day.'
"With this the stranger hurled a
fiac.kage toward the drover, which he
uckily caught," continued the squire.
"He showed us the package and
opened it before us all. It contained
2350 pounds in England notes."
"GreatLord!"exclaimed Mr. Tarbot,
clapping his hand to his breast. "Can
it be possible—No. I feel it. The
package is all safe."
He opened his coat and drew forth
a brown paper package from the inside
pocket.
"I tell you what, squire," he said.
"I burst out into a cold sweat all over
when you told me what tho drover's
package contained, for I have a pack
age of money for a client amounting
precisely to the sum yor. >imed."
"Why, the drover's package is the
very picture of yours, "said the squire.
"Outside perhaps; outside," said
the lawyer as he opened the package.
Inside there was nothing but a lot
of sheets of worthless paper cut into
the size of Bank of England notes.
Tarbot was for a time struck dumb.
"I've been robbed," he said
savagely, but restraining his voice.
"The package containing my client's
money has been stolen and this worth
less package putin its place. Your
drover, squire, is the thief."
"Well, it looks like it certainly,"
said the squire. "But what would
induce the man if he were a thief to
come here and show ine the money,
and desire to stay here all night?
Wouldn't he have got so faraway with
it as possible and just as quickly as
he could?"
"It seems so certainly," Tarbot
answered. "Nevertheless the circm
stances are so remarkable that I think
steps ought to bo taken at once by
you as a magistrate to secure the
drover if he hasn't shown a pair of
clean heels already."
"I agree with you,"said the squire,
"and I will send for the constable at
once and arrest him.
While a servant was quickly dis
patched for the officer of the law, the
squire and Tarbot, each armed with a
pistol, quitted the house by the rear,
and, being provided with a lantern,
went to the stable over which was tho
hayloft where the drover was supposed
to be. Ascending the ladder without
noise, the lawyer threw the light of
the lantern across the floor. There,
sure enough,lay the gaunt form of the
drover, with every sigu upon it of a
deep sleep. Nevertheless when thecon
stable arrived the drover was aroused
and,much to his surprise was informed
that he was a prisoner. After he heard
(he explanation of the fact he laughed
heartily and said:
"Well, now, isn't this some trick
that you are trying to practice upon
me? I vow, it's clever, but it isn't
fair to wake a tired man out of his
first sleep for the sake of a joke."
He was nssured that it was no joke,
and,being kindly advised by the squire
tog,» quietly with the constable, he
did so.
Next morning the body of a
murdered man was discovered on the
other side of the stream, about a quar
ter of a mile below the bridge. It
was removed to the village lockup,
and there Mr. Tarbot identified it as
Wray's. The skull was fractured and
the right arm broken. It was sup
posed that the arm was broken when
raised to protect the head from a blud
geon, which was found near the body.
But this was not all. The overseer
of the poor had in his charge in an
outhouse of the village inn a man who
had been found early that morning on
the bank of the stream with a dis
located arm and some broken ribs.
Here was a nice complication of
things, such, in fact, as had never be
fore come under the notice of Squire
Norman or liis son-in-law,Tarbot. The
man with the dislocated arm was
soaked and mud stained and had evi
dently been carried away by the over
flowing stream.
Tarbot naturally associated him with
fhe person who had given the package
to the drover for safe keeping. This
turned out to be all right, for the
drover, being quietly introduced to
the place where the man was, said:
"Well, neighbor, do you want your
package?"
The man, who had been lying for
some time apparently unconscious,
now bestirred himself and, looking
around and seeing that only the drover
was there, exclaimed:
"What! Are you the man I threw
it to?"
"Aye, it is safe," was the reply.
"When will you be ready to divide?"
"Don't soy a word," said ihe man
in a low tone. "Stay around until I
am able t.oget away and then I'll make
it all right with you."
After this all suspicion was removed
from the drover,and he was taken iuto
the counsels of the squire and Tarbot.
In a few days the man was well
enough to talk,and lie was encouraged
to do so by the drover, who assumed
tho character of a free rover looking
around for what he could pick up or
knock down. The man admitted that
he had taken the package from a
stranger whom he met on the high
way. He was confronted with the
club and Wray's corpse, but put on a
bold front anil denied all knowledge
of them. Finally, however, lie con
fessed to the drover thathehad brained
Wray and stole i the package from
him, afterward taking refuge in a
roadside inn, where he found an op
portunity to examine and learn the
nature of the plunder. Then he
grew restless and venture 1 out in the
storm, and in an attempt to cross the
stream missed his ford and thus came
to meet the drover.
There was nothing left to explain
the abstraction from the custody of
Tarbot of the genuine package and
the substitution of the counterfeit
except that Wray himself had dosigned
the scheme and carried it out as he
pushed Mr. Tarbot toward the bell
pnil, and that in making his way not
toward home, for that was in a con
trary direction, but to some place
where he intended to conceal the
money, he was met by tho ruffiau who
murdered and robbed him. This
wretch gave the name of George Rain
ton, and under that he was convicted
of the murder of Wray. It A'asafter
ward commonly asserted that his veal
name was that of a distinguished
Northumberland family, and that
through their influence the sentence
was commuted to transportation, and
that he was allowed to escape punish
ment altogether on condition of his
quitting the country. —A. Beckwitli in
Brooklyn Citizen.
FLORIDA'S POCAHONTAS.
A Romantic Story us Belated by Governor
Hloxliam to the Fishermen.
Governor W. B. Bloxham inciden
tally related the following legend in
his address welcoming the delegates
of the recent National Fishery society
to Tampa, Fla.
"You meet here upon this historic
ground where the footprints of some
of Spain's greatest cavaliers and
America's noblest captains can be
traced. While it is not my intention
to recur to their heroic deeds or to
offer you a cup filled with the am
brosia of ancient story, yet there is
one romance, based upon historic fact,
associated with this very spot that I
feel you will kindly indulge should
brief reference be made thereto.
"Wherever the history of America
is read the story of Pocahontas is
known. The romance is most capti
vating, and some of Virginia's most
honored sons trace back a lineage to
this daughter of the forest. But the
historic fact that a similar scene was
enacted on this very spot three-quar
ters of a century before the name of
Pocahontas was ever lisped by Eng
lish lips is unknown to even many
Floridans. It was here in 1528, twelve
years before De Soto landed on Tampa
Bay, that Juan Ortez, a Spanish youth
of 18, having been captured at Clear
Water, was brought before Hirrihuguu,
the stern Indian chief, in whose breast
was rankling a vengeance born of the
ill treatment of his mother by the fol
lowers of the ill-fated Narvarez. Ortez
was young and fair, but the cruel chief
had given the orders, and here was
erected a gridiron of poles, and young
Ortez was bound and stretched to meet
the demands of a human sacrifice. The
torch was being applied, the crackling
flames began to gather strength for a
human holocaust, when the stern
chief's daughter threw herself at her
father's feet and interposed in Ortez's
behalf. Her beauty rivalled that of
the historic dame 'whose heavenly
charms kept Troy and Greece ten
years in arms.' The soft language of
her soul flowed from her never silent
eyes as she looked np through her
tears of sympathy, imploring the life
of the young Spaniard.
"Those tears, the ever-ready weapon
of woman's weakness, touched the
heart of even the savage chief, and
Ortez was for the time spared.
"But che demon of evil in a few
months again took possession of Hir
rilingibr and his daughter saw that
eveu her ent'eatip" won' l be unavail
ing. She was betrothed to Mucoso,
the young chief of a neighboring
tribe. Their love had been plighted,
that God-giveu love that rules the sav
age breast.
"Her loving heart told her that
Ortez would be safe in Mueoso's keep
ing. At the dead hour of night she
accompanied him beyond dauger and
placed in his hand such token as
Mucoso would recognize.
"She acted none too soon. As th*)
sun rose over this spot, its rays fell
up»n the maddened chief calling in
vnin for the intended victim of his
vengeance. His rage \vas such that it
dried up the wellsprings of parental
affection, and he refused the marriage
of his daughter unless Ortez was sur
rendered. But that Indian girl, al
though it broke the heartstrings of
hope, sacrificed her love to humanity,
and Mucoso sacrificed his bride upon
the altar of honor.
"Ortez lived to welcome De Soto.
Tell me-aye, tell the world—where a
brighter example of nobler virtue was
ever recorded! Where in history do
you find more genuine and more touch
ing illustration of 'love, charity and
forgiveness'—the very trinity of earth
ly virtues, and the brightest jewels of
the Christian heaven?
"What a captivating theme this
Florida Pocahontas should present to
the pen of imagination, picturing this
spot then and today associated with
romance rich in historic love."—Savan
nah News.
FiglitiviK for His Own.
A short time ago two highway rob
bers (from Liverpool) attacked an old
Scotchman on the Glasgow and Car
lisle road, with the intention of rob
bing him of all he had. The Scotch
man being a strong, powerful man,let
out right and left, knocking the two
ruffians about unmercifully; but,being
two to one, he vras soon overpowered
and his money taken.
After they had g.'t clear away, one
thief saiil to the other,
"I'm blowed if he hasn't nearly
broke my jaw."
"I re.-kon," said the other, "that
he's broken one of my ribs at least;
but never mind. How much did yer
get off him?"
After searching among some but
tons the reply came:
"Two ha'pennies!"
"Good heavens!" cried the other,
holding his ribs. "How would he 'a'
fought for sixpence !"—Answers.
A Newsboy "< Eitrlity.
The oldest "newsboy" in the world
has just celebrated his birthday at
Joliet, 111. His name is Orsauis Page,
and he is > v o years of age. He is a
local character ami proud of the fact
that after eight decades of life he can
still get up at daylight to make his
rounds with the morning papers, and
spend the rest of the day in shouting
the latest editions through the streets
i of the city.
THE CITY OF SLEEP.
Over the edge of the purple down.
Where the single lamplight gleams,
Kninv ye the road to the Merciful Town
That is laid by the Sea of Dreams—
Where tlie poor may luy their wrongs away,
And the sick m«y forget to weep'/
Hut we—pity us ! ah ! pity us !
We wakeful: oh. pity us !
We must go back with Policeman Day—
Hack from the City of Sleep !
Weary they turn from the scroll and crown.
Fetter and prayer and plow—
-1 hey that go up to the Merciful Town,
tor her gates are closing now.
It is their right in the baths of Night
Body and soul to sleep;
We—pity u 8; uh ; j,(ty U8 ;
A\ e wakeful; oh! pity us !
We must go back with Policeman Day-
Back from the City of Sleep !
Over the edge of the purple down
Kre the tender dreams begin;
Look—we may look—at the Merciful Town
Put we may not enter in.
Outcasts all, from her guarded wall,
Pack to our watch we creep;
We—pity us; ah ! pity us !
We wakeful; oh ! pity us !
We that go buck with Policeman Day—
Back from the City of Sleep !
—Hudyard Kipling.
HUMOROUS.
Ho—Will you give me n kiss? She-
No; but I will lend you one for just a
second.
He—You must take me for a blamed
idiot. She—l never blamed you for
aiiythiug, did I?
He (apologetically)— I suppose you
think I'm a regular bear. She (brave
ly)—No, I dou't. Bears are said to
Lug—at least sometimes.
"Is papa strong as Samson,aunty?"
"Why, no, Willie; of course not."
"Well, mamma said he had you ou
Lis hands for two months."
"I fear," said the manager, as the
living skeleton sat on him and inter
mittently hammered him, "I fear my
curiosity has got the best of me."
"My pop don't ride no wheel," said
the bad small boy, rubbing the seat of!
liis little bloomers after the interview;
"but he's a scorcher all the same."
"Now, would you call Dauber an
impressionist?" •"No," replied the
other. "From my knowledge of his
work I should call him a depression
ist."
Laura—l wonder why it is that so
few of these pictures in the nude show
any character in their faces? Aunt
Maria Ann—They ain't got no char
acter.
Kicker—When I was alone with
Miss Smith in the parlor I proposed.
I told her she was the light of my life.
Rocker—And she—— Kicker—Ob,
she went out.
Fillen—By the way, your wife has
discontinued her pink teas. Follen—
Well, yes. We've got a little pink
tease at the house now that is occupy
ing all her time.
The One—Oh, how I wish I had
married a man who never drank. Yon
don't know how I envy you. ,The
Other—X—no, he doesn't drink, but
he smokes cubeb cigarettes. ,
"Charley is the most bashful fellow
I ever saw. Ue can't even read o
book. '' " What has bashfulness to do
with reading books?" "Why, the
poor boy can't get over the introduc
tion without blushing till his collar
smokes."
Everett Wrest—l understand you
an' Wayworn is boyhood chums.
Terry I'atetic —Xaw. I never met 'itn
lfiore'n five years ago, "What did he
mean, then, by saying that yon was
brought up together?" "Oh! Before
the judge."
Grandmother —Oh, Thomas! Thom
as! How can you bear to be all the
time lighting? Thomas—Why,'cause
I keep in training, of course! If yon
want me to, I can pin you into jest as
good physical condition as I am iD
thirty days.
Bronco Pete (thonghthfully)—
Wonder wot ever become uv Tarantula
Jim? Grizzly Dan—W'y, don't you
remember helping to lynch him\ last
July? Bronco Pete —W'y, uv course
I do!—but I wonder wot ever becomt
uv him finally.
Young Poet—You read my litt
poem, Mr. Sheerce? Editor—Y'es. It w
quite pathetic. It excited consid.
able comment in the oljfice. The 1
who attends to such matters infoi
me that it was the first poem he e
burned which was so full of tears
to put the lire out.
Getting Kvrn With llitn.
Revenge is sweet.
"Papa," said the little girl,
do you love best in,the world?'
Of course she thought sli
what he would reply, and he k
she thought she knew it. Co'
lv he decided to tease her.
"Daisy," he replied.
Daisy was her sister.
She thought it all over,and
climbed up in his la]).
"Papa, "she said. "I wish you
ask me if I love you or mamma .
"Very well," he returned, "D>
love mamma or me beat?"
Revenge is sweet; but, even so
tender hearted bit of humanity 1
not like to be too harsh.
"You won't feel very, very liat
I tell you, will you?" she whispe
He promised that he wouldn t.
"Well," she said, "then I gu
love mamma best.'
Yes; revenge is sweet.— Ch
Post.
glngitiff on the March.
All the military authoriti
Europe are now paying great att
to singing on the match. The 1
army has of late permitted its
to sing while marching. A li*
of soldiers' marching songs v
lished in Loudon, with Gener
ley's words printed big on <
to the effect that men marcu
and arrive fresher when the
t.hau when they don't. Ctt
enough,most of these so'igs are
can, words aud all.