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lowa County I )emoerat.
•/ VOL. XII. THE HIXER-OUT. Most people have met him scores oAlmes; lie hits lived in all ages and all climes; His manners me marked by perfect ease llis talk is a steady attempt to please. A hundred graces, beyond ad doubt, Adorn the professional dinet-out If you give good dinners, no change can dim Your shining significance fot him. He courts you until at last he sees Ills name bo your list of devotees. Ho lauds your claret, deplores your gout. This shrewd and politic diner-out. You know, while his oily words you hear. That they all are utterly insincere. On yourself yon strangely feel him look Asa species of proxy for your eook. Vet you somehow welcome, and do not llout. The overtures of the diner-out. His clever sayings, 'tis more than clear. Are sold you for just so much good eh er. Each funny lule has its cool design. Each epigram means a _lass of wine. And when with laughter yon fulrlv shout, i ll be asked next week," lliinksthc diner-out. A ou unde-stand with how little l rut it Hu praises your manners, your wit, your youth ; Am! yet you receive him night by night. Thin peripatetic appetite - At other men's cost grow n sleeky stout. Through long and rapacious diiung-outl THE BOLDEN HAUL La, Mikes, Mirandy, if there ain't Mr. Smith, our new minister, come to engage hoard, I believe,'' said Mrs. I’erry, excitedly. . So Tis, true a- I live. Well, there's one tiling certain, if lie comes here we shall want a now door-mat in less than a month." ‘ What makes you think so, Mi randy ?" “ Because the girls heels will wear it threadbare running after Mr. Smith." “■ La, sits' how your tongue does wag, Mi randy— -ho spry anti open the door.” This brief visit resulted in the engage ment of a bed-room and study, and Mr. Smith, tin' handsome rector of St. Luke's, took possession of them imme diately. This Connecticut village parish was composed of the Hit ters and the anglers, that is, the young lady part of it: *• Walk into my parlor said the spider to the Hy.” Poor Mr. Smith! But how should he know? This was las first charge —what would he not do -he proposed to ho eyes to the blind, feet to tin' lame, and bind up broken hearts; striving always to imitate the CreatTeacher, who went about doing good. This, and this alone was bis ob ject in life. They were good girls, too; genuine de fendants of the Puritans, as conscien tious as the old Covenanters, and a ma jority of them would have been asham ed even to dream of a llirtation —yet — yet they smiled, oli. so sweetly upon tin* handsome rector. Nevertheless,he was lonely and home sick—be thought of Aunt Eunice who with her painstaking care had supplied Ids dead mother’s place with such fidel ity—of bright Cousin Kitty with whom he parted so regretfully when lie left the little brown cottage, for anew Held of labor —of Kitty and her sweet ways, the companion of his boyhood, and tin* Iricnd of his early manhood. lint there was kind Mrs. Perry to talk to —she was one of those practical Yan kees who tell the truth bluntly, and cut and slash one’s feelings right and left without mercy, and with the heat of mo tives. Hood old soul, she had no daughter to give to the minister, but she bad plenty of advice. “ Now, Mr. Smith.'’ she said, “ there's Betsey Hopkins, she's just like her mother —porcupine all over, has a quilt ready to throw at anyone; and there's Lucy Hooper, -bo has a hankering after those blue Presbyterians—and Sarah Jane Hall —well, she has no moth er poor thing, so it's no wonder that die's not over neat —now don't mind winning ways, Mr. Smith, when a girl's buttons are hanging off. and ought to be sewed on—and Mr. Smith, yon hain't got no mother; you know, and 1 do hate to see a young man a kinder taken in. *■ L dare say some of these young ladies would make amiable wives, Mrs, Perry, but I have no thought of matri mony.'’ “ t)h! then you must have left your heart down w ith Aunt Eunice," she said with some curiosity. “Oh, no! 1 am heart whole and fancy free —my bride is the church, at least for the present," the young man said, with a pleasant smile. “Mirandy,” said Mrs. Perry shortly after, to her eoulidential companion, “ them girls that's sot their caps lor our new minister, had belter pull them oil', for I'm thinking he's notone of the mar rying sort." Well—n ay bes if Mirandy Poet is any judge of human nature, the one he thinks the prettiest will catch him yet." Squire Wheeler was the big man of Punckiuunck; he owned a great deal of real estate and drove two horses to church.his wife and son were stylish: altogether they wore “some pumpkins." Mirandy said—but the crowning excel lence of the Wheeler family culminated in Miss Antonia. She was at a fashion able boarding-school in New York 1 'by “to be finished," and tit the thro of Mr. Smith's advent, wa- receiving a genuine Parisian polish, which would enable her to shine in society. Use Pttnekinunk girls -eerotly ex- MINERAL POINT. WIS.. FRIDAY, DECEMBER 11. 1577. ulted at her absence, for. with her su perior attractions, they felt sure that she would monopolize Mr. Smith, and throw them all into the shade. And so it proved. The gothic-covered church became suddenly glorifed one summer’s morn ing, when there fluttered in a vision of marvelous beauty—the very incarna tion of sweetness and simplicity. It was Miss Antonia. The reeter glanced downward upon her, just as a ray of sunlight glistened on her glossy, golden hair, making her look like some moditcval saint. Mr. Smith admired golden hair a woman so crowned, as with a halo, seemed to him an embodiment of purity and goodness; here, then, it was in abundance, shading the face of an angel, he thought, and he never seemed so near heaven as upon that particu lar morning. At dinner bis irrepressible landlady asked him what be thought of Miss Wheeler. “Sbeis a pure, true woman, with magnificent golden locks," be replied, while a slight color rose to bis checks. “Ob, beware. Mr. Smith; remember ‘ all is not gold that glitters.’ " “ A word to the wise is sufficient." added Mirandy. But who thinks of old maxims, ur coolly calculates passibililies, when fresh, young love lays ever so softly bis light touch upon the heart. Mr. Smith did not; be was wickedly heterodox, for be oll'ered incense to hi# particular idol, Miss Antonia Wheeler, and she reserved her polished alfeeta tions for lesser lights; to him, she was an artless, golden haired beauty. That pleasant summer passed away, as all enjoyable things do; the winter came, as dark days will come, and pal ish affairs remained the same. Another summer rolled around —one whole year of ministerial life gone forever, and Mr. Smith still unmated. Aunt Eunice wrote that “ report pro nounced Miss Win eler an incorrigible flirt." That I will ascertain from her own sweet self, and that right speedily too, thought the enamoured rector. Very soon an opportunity offered, for a grand picnic came oil’ in a piece of woods outside the village. Mr. Smith and Antonia stole away from Ibe emu puny, and in a shady nook, by the riv er's bank, found a romantic, rustic seat, made by a fallen monarch of the forest. Antonia, with girlish glee, threw oil' her seaside hat. and untying a gay rib bon. allowed a part of her gulden tresses to How loosely over her shoulders, while the remainder funned a braid encircling her bead. 1 low beautiful she was—with her pink cheeks, fair complexion, and classic features to say nothing of the dark, violet eyes which shot such thrilling glances from beneath their lashes, at the reciprocating Im/.ed orbs of her hand some pastor. Twas all up with him poor Mr. Smith. “ Tony,” he said softly. She nodded, “ Tony, that Hreeian style of eoill’ure suits you admirably, .lust now you carry out my idea of the Queen of the Peerless; these abundant locks, bow magnificent and silky they are," and lit* touched them reverently with the lips of his fingers. She drew back with a startled look, Iml replied: “ Yes, nature Imx been bountiful to me, and 1 like to arrange my hair in this -tvle to show my friends and critics that it is all my own,” “ And really growing on your head, too," be observed. “No wonder that you are proud of it in these days of shams." “ Yes. indeed I bate everything that is false,” she replied. “Then, as an opposite, you must love the true. Tony, what do you say to lov ing" The sentence remained unfinished, for the sound of voices and merry laugh ter. apparently very near, caused them to rise quickly in evident embarrass ment—and as Antonia rose, the sway ing branch of a tree caught astray cock of long hair and held fast. Mr. Smith, springing for the branch, reached it with difficulty and drew it towards him, hut while endeavoring to I disentangle the rebellions lock, his hand | slipped, up flew the branch, carrying! with it that wealth of golden liairj whole and entire, leaving the young lady, not exactly scalped, but minus her wig. There she stood for an instant, ailbrd ing Mr. Smith a glimpse of her totally , bald head. Pitying her mortification he picked . up the golden treasure and politely as- ‘ stated her to replace it. just as the pie-i nicer* came sauntering up in search ofj their missing pastor. Fortunate Mr. Smith ! for be was at once disenchanted, and forever cured of his fancy for golden hair; u keen | sense of the ludicrous, 100 obliged him to conceal a smile, as it occurred to him | that if Absalom bad worn a wig how fortunate it would have been for him when placed in a similar predicament. However, he kept his own counsel and returned home a wiser man. Very soon afterwards his vacation la gan. and going straight to the little; brown cottage, it was not many weeks ! 1 efore he found out that he had been i liliml.iuul that cousin Kitty had crown tailor and more beautiful, and that in spite of a profusion of dark brown curls, he asked her to become his wife, but not without first satisfying himself, by an impolite but vigorous (.nil, that the curls were growing fast upon her pretty head. Lucky Mr. Smith, for Kitty accepted | him. hut it set tongues wagging w hen she was duly installed in the new par sonage, for of course she was w ell nated for carrying oil' the coveted prize, but she found a fast friend and all v in good Mrs. Perry. When an epidemic raged in Punek -1 inttek, by her patient endurance and ; skillful nursing of the deserted sick, she won all hearts. " Robert." she said one day to her husband and /xw lor, in a doubling lone of voice. "do you think my curls, if they mr natural, are exactly suitable for a clergyman’s wife?” Kilty! they are your crowning beau ty. I wouldn't have you part w ith them for worlds." I lappy Mr. Smith. Tin: FARM. I.ookino over the grape \ine \on will observe many slender canes not having more than half the diameter of the stronger ones; these must he cut close to the parent stock. Then cut oil' the stronger canes at the point where they begin to decrease in diameter. This point is generally from three to six feet from the terminal bud, and may be know n from the fainter color of the wood and immatured leaves. This done, and tin 1 vine is pruned. Dutches* Funner. Wk often wonder why farmers in this country do not use the cart more; it is far more handy for loading and dump ing manure, soil, roots, etc., than the wagon, being more easy to load, and especially to unload. A earl can be quickly loaded and dumped, and only requires one good horse to draw it. In l aigland carts are in constant use, being very popular in the harvest held. We are glad to see that dumping wagons are employed on many of our farms. This loading manure from a barn-yard, and hauling it by wagon a few hundred yards, to be unloaded fork-full by fork full, is a waste of lime and labor, of both man and beast, Ilurul Worhl. Kitpino Fin itsFuksii. The cause of the decay of fruits is prinupalK due to atmospheric iulluenee thereon. If we can keep the air from the fruit we can keep it fresh for a longer or shorter time, according as it is more or less im- I perfectly isolated. One plan for ae leomplishing this end, is to mix one | ounce of beeswax to each pound of tab I low and of rosin used; melt in a suita j ble vessel, over a slow lire, being careful ' that it does not inllame. Hub each fruit 1 with pulverized chalk, and dip iu the | mixture, when heated to about 140 u , hold the fruit until the film sets, and | then pack, where they may lemain as : cool as possible. The same formula is | also an excellent preservative for eggs. Hki’l.anti.no in Oui'uauds.—Many peo ple, after planting a young orchard, fail to replace the trees which may become unhealthy or die from being badly planted, or from other causes which often occur, and the orchard grows up with uncovered spaces, giving a general air of unlhrifl; for Hindi persons areas a rule, those who give tlie least subse queul care to their trees. Replant as soon as possible after you I'nd the ne cessity for it. (live good car? and atten tion to the trees, at least si eh care as yon would give to other callable crops, and the result will be, in nh e eases out of ten.you will receive as much money from the farm orchard as front other! average crops. If the repknted trees' are given special care, they \i 11 Usually ■ “catchup" and become of equal size' with the original planting. Si;kd I’otawks. —The transact ions of j the Australian Agricultural Society | would seem to show that the product of I potatoes, large and small, vere pretty j ! much the same there as otherwhere*. j A writer therein experimuitiug with I potatoes received from Kngluul, savs: I selected two of the lilest, which i weighed 1 pound 2 ounces and these i [ were cut up so as to make IS sets. In a row next to them I planted a similar number, cut from the same weight of these potatoes, but all small in size; in fact, such as are usually used as seed potatoes. I dug up the crop, uid found that the two large potatoes pioduced ft pounds 12 ounces, while the produce of the smaller seed was only <i pounds. But the most remarkable part of the experi ment was, that amongst the trodtice of the large seed there was hardly a small j potato, while the produce of tin smaller consisted of a great many small tubers, and scarcely any large. If a ealeula tion he made on this basis, It will he seen that 1 ewt. of large potatoes would produce over (1 ewt. of a salable crop, while the same weight of small seed , would produce only 4 ewt. of a crop, a large proportion of which would he : only of use as pigs’ food. A Chkai* Bkk Hoi sk. —A eorresjiond enl of the Americmi lie- Jotinutl writes the following description of a cheap winter house: Tw o years ago I was without a proper bei house, and not having a great amount of capital to invest, 1 studied upon the subject, and the result is the construction of a house upon the fol lowing plan: Me first ting down about four feel in to the ground a place that could be drained, and removed the earth front a space eighteen by twelve feet. Wc put six posts, (tut feet long, on each side, and united by girths, seven feet from (he floor. \\ c covered the whole inte rior with matched hoards, and tilled in ou the outside with the dirt removed from the interior. As wc ting down four tcet, the three tcct above ground was - built up with stone a.id dirt, making a I thickness of four feet all around. The i space directly over the bee room was j tilled in with sawdust 1 foot thick. To the projecting ends of the posts we 1 built a roof (bat eOvei-t all; it covers a 'space of about .'tOx'JO feet. In the cen ter tbere is a ventilator; there is but one entrance, w ith double doors. Wc have whiten'd eighty swarms in it suc cessfully. and use it during the summer for extracting, and in which to store > honey during (he hot weather, ll is a delightful place in which to work, being " charming and cool." The oullav in cash on onr house did not exceed slo. We base, m addition to our w inlering room, a loft in which to store various utensils. Uis well to have such -a house built early in the season, that all moisture mas dry out i before storing the bees therein. A bouse on the same plan can be made 1 much smaller for small apiaries, We ; think a bouse S\L* would accommodate seventy-live swarms, but it is well not to crowd too many into one room. THE HOrSEHOM). Nut: Hskd Hinukurreah. One cup of sugar, one cup of molasses, one cup of melted lard or butter, one half-enp of boiling svator, two teaspoonfnls of soda and one of ginger; mixed hard svitb Hour, roll thin and cut in eards; one ball of this makes quite a quantity. To Preserve (Vr Flowers. Put a pinch of nitrate of soda into the glass each time you change the svater. Ni (rate of potash in a powder has nearly i the same cH'ecl. I have kept them a I fortnight, says a correspondent. Fail Si-omu Carl. Two eggs and Une clip of white sugar, well beaten to j gelber. add a little extract of lemon, mie half :• lablespoonful of soda dis solved in three tableqiooiifuls of water, I and one and one half cups of Hour, into which a leasiioont'ul of cream tartar | has been sifted; hake on a shallow tin, | in a moderate even. LamrStew. Take ball’a shoulder of lamb, hod it in two quarts of water for two hours; then pul in potatoes, onions, turnips, cut in quarters, two teaspoon fills of salt, and pepper to the taste. Ten minutes before serving put in Ibe dumplings. Teas mi; the Su e Boom Dried leaves of sage, one half ounce; boiling water, one quart; sleep for three-quar ters of an hour, and then strain forjuse; sugar can be added to soil the taste. Fepperminl. spearmint, balm, boar hound, and other herb teas, are matte in the same manner, Shavino Soap. The Ihui/i/ixU I'uculur gives the following formula for a shavmg-soap. The while soup, four ounces; spermaceti, one-half ounce; melt (bein together, and stir until nearly cold, seent with such oils as may be most agreeable, A Loon (VsTAitn. Scald a quart of milk, take oil'the scum ami pour it hot on the beaten eggs. Take live eggs; throw out the yolks of two; three table spoonfuls of sugar, a pinch of salt, a chip or two of lemon or orange and a little vanilla. Set it to steaming in a close-covered vessel, ami steam live or six minutes; then set it on ice, and it. certainly is delicious. l’|( K led Onions. Take small onions, peel and put them into a stewpan of boiling water, set them over the lire, and let them remain until quite clear; then take them out quickly and lay them between two cloths to dry. Hod some vinegar, with ginger and a whole pepper, and, when cold, pour it over the onions in glass jars, and tie them closely over. (Joooa-nlt CAKE. Break two eggs in a colfec-eup; till it full with good sour cream, one cupful sugar, two cupfuls Hour, one tea-poonfnl soda, two of cream-tartar, stir well; Ibis will make four cakes baked on jelly-tins or any tin; then ti.x the icing; one-half cupful prepared eoco-nnl. one-half cupful sour cream, one half cupful white sugar; spicad each cake with Ibis. Farmers’ Fih it Cake. Souk two cups of dried apples over night in bike i warm water. In the morning drain the apples ami chop them line. Him-1 mer them for two hours in two cups of | molasses; when cool add a cup of brown sugar, half a teaspoonful ofj cloves, one of cinnamon, half a grated nutmeg, and a pinch of salt. Stir in a \ cup of butter, two beaten eggs, half a cup of sour milk, and three cups of' (lour. Add a heaping teaspoouiul of soda, dissolves] in two tablespoon fills | of hot water, and last of all put in a cup-, ful or more of stoned raisins dredged ! lightly with (Kmr. Stir well and hake immediately in pans with buttered pa por m the bottom of each. This cake mu ho made in largor quantity, ami if woll wrapped ami put in a close box, or jar, will koop frosh ami good for months, I'ouk AM) Mk,\ns, Put a quart of navy hoans to soak ovor night in plenty of Inkt' warm walor. In tho morning pour oil tho walor, and put ou frosh cold water; let this hoal, thou ohango it again for frosh walor, Hoil tho hoans until tho skins aro tomlor, whioh will ho known hy dipping a few from tho walor and o\nosing thorn to a hroath of air. when llio skin w ill ourl up. Stir in a toaspoouful of soda, and whon tho wator ooasos to foam, drain it oil', and pul tho hoans in a slono jar ono that holds ahonl (wo tpiarls is largo onougli. Sorapo tho rind of half a pound of jiork, and out il otto-half an inch apart and hilly as doop. Ihiry tho pork in (ho hoans until tho snrfaoo is ovoji with I thoni, thou sprinklo ovor thorn a little* sail and a toaspoouful of molassos. Pour on boiling walor until it is visihlo above tho hoans, place aoovor on tho jar and pul il in a .nodorulo ovon; add boiling walor as oiion as nooossary; lot thorn oook for oiglil or lon hours. I'wo hours hoforo (hey aro sorvod, son that tho wator is ovon with tho top of tho hoans, thou do not add any moro; I thoy aro not brown 01 ough, romovo tho oovor a liltlo while hoforo taking thorn from tho ovon. Humor. Tho host way to spark a country girl is lo oullivalor aonuainlnnoo. Wild-oyod people aro already roaming about tho shops m soaroh of Christmas prosonts. Tho size of Paris honnots is growing loss, hut llio sighs of huslmmis grow largor at tho price. Ono of his lady olorks in the Interior Department hoing inoorrootly told that she iniisl prononnoo "Schnrz" MVto " shirts," replied, " If ho is ‘shirts' wn olorks aro ' nndor shirts.' " A Plica somnahiilist was recently found parading the streets in a night •'hirl and a heavy rain storm. Some persons think this is another sign of the rev ival of the old Whig party. Iti ic/iex | /or /Vmoerd/. Th‘ladies are all down on the lele ! phone. They don't like lo have a fol I low whispering in I heir ear with his I month, like Sheridan at Winchester, twenty miles away. I‘liihi. Unlhtin. " Well, may I hope, then, dear, that al some future time I may have the happiness of making yon my wife?" " es, I hope so, 1 am sure," she re i plied, “for 1 am getting tired of suing | follows for broach of promise," There is anew paper in New York called Tln' (hinitiii Slriiijiih'. Probably started by some eliap who is going to board his mother in law. HulMiti. A distinguished mother writes to a newspaper for advice, which she gels tlmsly: "The only way lo euro your son of staying out late o'nights is to break his legs, or get the girl he rims after to do the house work." When a young gentleman sits down to the lea (able and says, "Drive that cow down this way.” ho evidently moans, " please pass the creamhut has loft olt a part, which, in full, might properly ho construed to moan, "drive the cow down here so that the calf cun drink." Welkotn, Patterson and Conover! Welkoin! last roe rooks to the army nv reform. I see the end. The House is ours, llio Senil is onrs, and the uoosor per stands alone. I'lf the Dimoerisy liev anv senee, the postolllses is ours in I HSU. ' \iinhii. An Indian was hanged at Napa, Cal.. lasi Friday. And wo are convinced that (he Indian can never he civilized. Me didn't look with prolicund contempt on the persons who were present, and he didn't insinuate that lie was the happi est, person and the only saint in llio crowd. lloc/ifUr Dmwcrut, A imlr of very chubby lens, Kiimum-iI In scsrli’lnose; A pnlr of llltlu Hi ii)iliv lioiiln. Willi miller <li mi lit fit I tom; A little kilt, n Mule coil. Cut im h inothor uni Ami lo! Imforc iih Htrlilm In Uinta The fuluni'i coming mini." 'J’lie fact that Miss i’cppard was mux tcicd into matrimony in Wolairn, the other day, seems to ho an appropriate spice item. A sixteen year-old girl on Columbia street lias a button string four yards long,containing 11/711 buttons. And that girl’s father fastens his suspenders on his trowsors with a shawl-pin, a piece of twine and a sharp stick. Unwkrye. It makes even a good Christian’s lip quiver and a half smile to creep over his usually stolid countenance to see Urn mosquito, with a blanket round his em aciated form, rubbing up against the refrigerator, preparatory to leaving for a better world. Novki. Usk ok A Pi i.i’ir.—There aro queer nooks and corners left in old Eng land. A visitor to a country parsonic!ls how, when he accompanied him lately to take the duly in a remote parish, Um sexton said, " Perhaps your reverence won’t mind preaching from tho chancel, for we’ve got a duck a settin’ in the pulpit.” , No. is.