lowa County Democrat.
HAXAGIXC, A IirsRASP.
"Hew 'hall I managi* my husbandC
I will tell yon inv dour, if 1 ran:
He ib really ii wonderful creature.
that troublesome animal. Man
Vest really a wonderful creature—
So strange, inconsistent amt queer,
Hut you'll s.'on know Uie eceret by feat-nine
Thu inoitua optrandl, my dear!
if tic slays out too late in the evening.
Partaking of supper and wine.
Don't prove him a I.Usc fabricator,
When he comes home by asking the lime;
for hesuiely wi I tell yon the town clock
Hut the moment before rang out one
When it struck he hail counted il over
.Inst three limes before it had done!
And then, if his hat. in the morning.
Is smaller by tar than his head,
Don't hint by the merest allusion
That Ins lordship went tipsy to bed;
Hut rather regard the occurrence
A phenomenon puzzling and queer
With a strange took of niyalillcailon
In your eye, if lie’s watching, my dear'
\nd don't fall to s.-u on his buttons.
And likewise Ins clot lies mend with care;
Don't tease linn for money for shopping:
Don't frown when he acts like a bear;
Don't tel! him too often, my deary.
1 hut your poor head is aching with pain,
I,t*sl lie whisper way down in Ins bosom,
••Oh' I wish I were single again I"
Don't tell him that Mary, the housemaid.
And Ann, the obstreperous cook,
Defuse to receive y .nr suggestion*
With even so much as a look .
Don't teli him how very annoying
You often have found it to lie
To tie told to ‘tlet out of the kitchen.
And don't come a bothering me!
Hut always seem cheerful and happy.
Ami always look pleasant and gay;
Than a frown Iheie is nothing more potent
In driving one's husband away.
And ibus you must ever keep striving
You'll Uml it an excellent plan:
Hut whatever yon do, dear, remembei
Thin you husband is only a man
TilH PHANTOM I.KJHT.
Nellie and 1 wore sitting by the how
viudow in our drawing-room, which she
lead thrown wide open. The day had
been oppressively hoi. hut now a faint
breeze was coining in from the sea,
most refreshingly welcome after tint
sultry stilling heal of tin* day. It was
quite dark—that soft, velvety darkness
that belongs only lu a p* fleetly moon
less. starless night.
Jn-t down below out window lav the
yard or two of garden, then the lung
straight line of tin* promenade, with its
asphalt walk and drive dimly defined
riv a shadowy row of white posts i on
neeted by ornamental chains. Heyond
the embankment lay the wide, desolate
waste of .-a nds. si retell ing away for miles
and miles on either hand.
The tide was far out, so far that only
a sort of pale gray gleam on the hori
zon showed where the sea was jn-t be
ginning to creep over the shoals and
sand-banks oil the South-port coast.
Seven tit les away to the right, across
the estita yof the Kibble the steady
light from the Lytham hgiu-ho.iso kept
vigilant watch and ward over the dan
gerous shoal, on which many a good
ship has gone to its doom of snipwiook
Nellie was leaning out of the window,
her elbow on the sill, her eyes fixed on
the misty, soft darkness outside. It was
as dark inside as out; we had no thought
of lighting the gas, that long summer
■' How still it is!" said she, dreamily.
"What a spell of solemn silence the
.night lays on everything!"
As if to contradict her words, a faint
sound like a far-off voice seemed sud
denly to rise from the sands below, and
swept by with a prolonged, mournful
'■ What is that''' site asked, startled.
“ Someone eallingditwit on the sands,”
1 said. "The intense stillness carries
the sound'a great distance at night.”
“ I heard such a wild legend, this
morning," site went on. persistently,
“ connected with those great deserts of
-and that stretch over toward Lytham.
Old Joe, the boatman, -ays they arc
hunting tip a phantom voice."
•• How thrilling!" I remarked, skepti
cally. “ What toes it say?”
" Don't set ill'. .It an," said Nellie, a lit
tle vexedly, “It is a most pathetic,
dreadful legend. Years ago. before there
was a town here at all. people used to
cross the sands between here and Ly
tham tin horseback. One stormy even
ing, a traveler hud crossed, as usual,
a* - 1 had almost reached the shore, when
suddenly a bright bght appeared, hov
ered for a moment over a spot a yard
or two away, and then vanished. At
the same moment, a ) .teous. unearthly
cry echoed all afounu. The horse be
came wild with terror, and broke loose,
throwing his rider to theground. When
he recovered himself, he found, lying
on the ground at itis feet, the hotly of a
beautiful young girl, hlu* was quite
dead w. h a ghastly wound in her side,
from vvh'eh the h’ood had (lowed all
over he" white dress. The traveler stag
gered av. -iy to the. nearest house, got
assistance, r.nd had the gi'Ts body laid
in an upper room. That night an aw
ful storm aro <•. A ship was wrecked
on the Horse bank and only one man,
the caption, saved. He was taken to
the same house where the traveler had
alrcadv found shelter, and by some mis
take. was pot into the room whore Lie
murdered girl was lying.
At the sight of her he gave an appall
ing shriek, and fell down senseless.
When ht revived, he was questioned,
and confessed that tin beautiful young
girl was his wife, whom in a moment of
rage and jealousy he hadstabbed to the
heart and cat into the sen. And the
MINERAL POINT, WIS., FRIDAY, .JANUARY 11, IS7S.
sea had given up her dead and the
waves had east him on shore, and the
murderer and his victim were face to
face. And now they say the voice of
the murdered girl haunts the place
where she was lound. il seems to rise
from the sands, and goes echoing and
wailing along, calling, calling, as if in
mortal agony. The old boatman savs
people have followed it, believing some
one was bi peril, and have been lured
on and on. lilt the tide has overtaken
them, and they were drowned."
“ What a horrible tale!" 1 said with a
shudder. 1 I vvisl you had not (old it
" And he .'ays," went on Nellie, un
heeding my remark, " that whoever j
hears the voice is in ri'k of great pei il )
or danger, or some kind of sorrow or 1
trouble is about to happen to him."
„ Nellie's voice had uneonsciou- !y taken
u tone of awe. The still, sombre dark
ness. the midnight hour, and the weird,
melancholy legend had infected u~ both
with an undefined sensation of oppres
sion and fear, a presentiment of dread
and evil. We kept our places by the
window, looking out into the deep, \el
vety darkness, with the far away solitary
light from the light house gleaming like
a red spark.
Suddenly, while we sal. the sound of a
voice rose again from the lonely sand',
a moaning, piteous voice wailing and
imploring as if in unutterable distress.
It seemed to mingle with the boom of
the distant sea, now rising, now falling, a
lonely desolate wail, thrilling through
the darkness like a soul in mortal agony .
It was dying away in the distance, in a
low, faint sob, when Nellie suddenly
sprang hack into the room.
" O .lean, look!" she cried, " Look, tin*
phantom light!' 1
1 leant out of the window , and gazed
out along the f promenade. Hashing
through the sombre* darkness like a
great star was a brilliant, beautiful light.
It came rapidly toward ns from the
right, apparently iloaling in the air, and
illuminating tie* space before il for ev ■
eral yards. || advanced very swiftly,
with a steady, forward motion, llo'ating
about a yard from the ground. As it
came nearer, we perceived, looming
dimly behind it, a giant shadow, weird
and grotesque, with outspread wings
and misty, undefined form, while a
sharp, rustling, whirling sound accom
panied its progress.
As the phantom approached, the des
olate moaning ros again from the
sands, and swept along in low, shudder
ing cries, dying away, sad and piteous
as before. With the la't faint sound,
the light leaped up for one second into
intense brilliancy, and disappeared.
"()!" cried Nellie fearfully ‘What
is it, Jean ?"
‘ 1 don’t know," 1 replied, a feeling of
unaccountable dread and horror taking
hold of mo. The very demon of fear
seemed to possess my senses; an icy
grasp of terror laid hold of my heart.
The air outside seemed to have be
come suddenly clammy and cold; a
chilly, eerie wind crept in at the window .
The very darkness seemed tilled with
shades, hideous and imnalpab’le, at
which 1 dared not look, lest they should
take form before my eyes.
“ There it is again!" shuddered Nellie.
And with unutterable dread we saw
the brilliant, star-light again floating to
ward us, lids time from the right hand.
It came on swiftly, with the impalpa
ble, fantastic shadow in the air above it,
and, when exactly opposite, vanished.
We sal paralyzed with terror, not dat
ing to move, a horrible, benumbing ter
ror seizing our hearts.
This phenomenon happened several
times, the light alternately appearing
from the right and left, and always van
ishing when exactly opposite to ns, and
always accompanied by the moaning
Again the low wailing sounds from the
sands, profoundly melancholy, inexpres
sibly mournful, like not)ting akin to
humanity. No words were uttered, hut
the agony of the tones was like a voice
from the grave.
“ Jean, Jean, here it is again!" cried
Nellie, cowering in my arms.
And once more the brilliant phantom
light appeared. This time it came on
more slowly, glancing to and fro un
steadily, while the shadowy form behind
il •coined more grotesque and misty
“Oh, Jean, if it is true! If it comes
to foretell some loss, some trouble!''
sobbed Nellie in tears.
“ Hush, hush, dear!" 1 tried to say re
assuringly. "It cannot be. Sorrow
may come to us if (>od wills it, but not
“ I say. old fellow," shouted a voice
. down below in the darkness. You'll
frighten somebody into tits with that
lantern dodge of yours. You and your
confounded bicycle look like some hor
rible, ghostly spectre, flitting along in
the dark. You gave me a precious
start, I can tel! you," Nellie and 1
jumped to our feet, and gazed incredu
lously out of the window. Down below
j in the road, a yard or two to the right.
I the phantom light stood stationary at
last. In the glare before it a young
fellow was standing, while beyond
loomed the fantastic, mysterious shad
ow robbed of all its terrors in a mo
‘ Isn’t it a stunning dodge?" -aid the
shadow, in moat unghostly slang. “ You
see. Jack, this asphalt's find rat** to prac-
tice on; hut :i follow has no olnuu‘o in
the day-time for ihoso confounded car
riages; so 1 riti.mwl .*ut this dark lantern
ami fastened it to my bicycle. ami 1 oan
spin alone in poaoo now."
lako oaro you don't spin away the
wits of all tho old maids on tho promo
nado, roturnod tho othor. ' You look
most horribly liko some goblin from
tho lower regions w ith your dark-lantern
dashing in front; thoso noiseless whools
and your long logs and arms spread out
liko groat wmgs in-hind.'
Tho othor laughed,
rho old nlatds aro all fast adoop
i long ago. Moss (hoir old oyr"’ ho 10-
| Inrnod irreverently. " Hut I >.i\ lack.
I tho malolt for tho four-oars wil’ lia\o to
he pn. oil to-morrow, wo aro going to
j havo an awful storm. listen' how tho
i wind sighs and mo, ns among tho gird
ors of tho t>ior. It sounds for all the
world liko somo ono calling out in dis
tress, and it's a mho sign of rough
weather. What a rage tiivgory will ho \
Tho two old ma'ds had hoard (|tiil(-
enongh, Nell and I looked at each
othor sheepishly, it must ho ooufossed.
and then hurst into a hcartv laugh.
llow She Won a llnshaml.
Nfw OrloaiiH I*icn > uutv
Hen- a story illustrative of the fact ,
that tears arc a powerful weapon in the
hands of a matrimonially-inclinedmod
ern N'-ohe. There was a southern mer
ehanl. a handsome, dashing fellow, who
astonished ail his relatives a few \ears j
ago, hy ma rylnga verv plain giil, the 1
sister of his lius'noss partner. The
marriage- turned out reasonably happy,
hnl it has always lomainod a mysterx
to tho society hollos, who wen- ready to
fall into his amis at a word, li was
tears (and not " idle tears") that trapped
him. Ono evening ho cal'od at h->
partner’s lumso, ami fomul onl\ the
voting lady at homo. Yen art ih ; v -I
- I tho eon versa I ion to her own a • i ■
and told him that she wa -a inin ,
skive to her sister, tyrannized o,n an I
ill treated, that life had heeotee -ncli a
hurden to her that she shotihi ; and hen-eif
of it unless she 00l lld change he. homo. ;
The vis-on-tried to comfort Im .hul in
vain. Marriage was very fat fiom hi- ,
thoughts then, and In- had no love to |
give 11 1>Vw ho e. N join •'> ha ; - fell 1i I el
and fasti- . and at la-1 tin y eame in a
hys,erica • torrent. Hi- i jaeulat n(ih of
sympathy were in vain, when she eried:
" Oh, w In a e shah I go? wh >wltlgiveme
tr home?'’ '■ I world if I dated oiler it.
poor girl," said (In- male vietim, and
ipiick as lightning the res pom e What
would my sjstci- say if you .married me?"
What eouhl I he man do under Stteli eir
i-unistanees? \ tolerably fair face was
lying on his bosom, a pair of grateful. ‘
loving eyes (she d'id love him dearly)
1 were looking up into his own, and a del
ieale little hand had sought and found |
his. lie did what any disengaged gen- '
lleman would have been likely to do
pressed hi- soil, seen red her uni'eluetant
i consent, informed her sister of il. mar
ried her, and did 1 1 is best to make her
happy. She. in her turn, made him a
good wife. I.illle hy little ho discovered
her stratagem hut he novel told his
w he of il.
-♦ • ♦-
\ Sleeping ( ur llpisodc.
Only a few nights ago an aoeident oc
curred on the Northwestern road, in
which a sleeping coach was turned over
on its side. As the car went over, h
lady in a herlh on the opposite side was
hurled out and landed in the herlh of a
gentleman whose weight was ahold 200
pounds. She was sound asleep at tho
ji mo of the accident, and so was hi-.
liotli awoke,startled tit the sudden (tim
ing of the ear. and scarcely knowing
whether they would he hurried into
eternity or not. The clothing had fal
len out of tho lady's herlh and was
almost siiH'ocating the gentleman. Kin
heard his deep breathing for a moment;
then it suddenly eea-ed, and the horrible
thought passed through her mind that
he had been smothered to death, lie
recovered himself, however, to find that
I his nose was flattened against the cold
' glass wind-w. Not knowing what man
ner of person had fallen upon him. he
held the lady up otf his head, and at
this juncture, when the conductor asked
I if any one was hurt, he cried out breath
lessly: “ Nobody’s hurt, hnl I wish you'd
come and take this fellow olf my head."
The lady attempted to move, hut found
she could not. l-ights were soon pro
eured anil both passengers were relieved
of their awkward dilemma.
A VitMi.Aiti.K Rost-;. -Then is at
11ildi sheim ('.ithedral, <h-rmany, a well
known rente hush which is believed to
he over IT* hi years old. In recent years
it seems to have been getting into de
crepitude, and fears have been enter
tained that it was going to die. The
help of the most renowned gardeners
has been called in to prevent this, if
j.u-iUe, and several foreigners have
hei n on the spot for tin- pnrpis-e,
Whether it he due to their endeavors
or not. the old tiling seems to have
taken fresh heart again. Out of the
root kimlis of the hush anew sprout has
appeared, which is growing so vigor
ously that there is good hope this
venerable rose stock may yet “renew
I’o Poveu Kuos. Imv .small mulVut
tiugs in the water aiul drop an egg in
oaeh ring. and the egg will he smooth
and the shape el ring.
I' l Vv'k Ink bruised galls, two
pounds, logwood chips, green copperas,
and sum, one pound of each; water,
seven gallons Hod two hours, and
strain I’roduet, live gallons
Mi i'i ins lim e cupfuls corn i
meal, one cupful (lour, one egg, one half |
euplul sugar or molasses, two teaspoon- [
fill' of cream tartar, and one of soda, '
and a piece of butter the size of a hut
lernul; wet with milk to about the eon
'isteney of sponge cake.
hi no tii \ t w n i Stick hi i not Km vk,
(hie euplul white sugar; enough water
to dissolve it; set on the stove and let
it hod until it w ill " hair;" heat the
white ol one egg to a still' froth ; pour
the healed sugar on the egg, and stir
briskly until cool enough to stay on the
cake. The icing should not he applied
until the cake I' nearly or ipiite cold.
I'lus will frost the tops of two common
i'uAimin'hi ssk Take one lifth of
a package of gelatine and half a cupful
ol eolduiilk. place in a farina boiler,
and stir genii. over the lire until the
gelatine is dissolved; pour into a dish,
and place in a cool room; take one
pint of rich cream and whisk it with a
1 1 n egg-heater until it is thick; flavor
the cream with either vanilla or wine,
and sweeten to taste; when the gelan
tine is cool, strain carefully into the pi e
paiasl cream; line a mold with lady
lingers: then pom the cream in care
fully until it is Idled; cover wilh lady
lingers, and ice the top, if you tie
to Kt 'iov i \V via I’vi i u \\. t a
cloth in pretty warm wait rand dampen
the paper all over. Let and remain some
liiteen or twenty minutes, wet again
thoroughly, and then nso a dry cloth to
rub the paper oil. Some!iipes n will
pee l otf easily ; again it will ml! up only
a' far as yon can rub it. On plii'leied
walls (In' second wt lliiig will soften the
paper so that it will peel oil' almost en
till Ml wall papers ought to he m
moved and the walls washed in weak
Iv e or copperas water before anew pa pel
is laid, as this renders the room sw taler
and preserves the new paper much bet
ter W here gn ase spot . have been, it
should he washed thoroughly in hot
soapsuds, or the grease will strike
through the new paper in a slant
Tu i: S.vi.ti Nti ok Hi mu. Tina e is
one little item which the butler makers
throughout the country ine very care
less and indill'ereni nhuiit. Were it an
expensive item, or one very hard to he
procured, there might he some excuse,
lull It is not. I refer to the salting of
butter. If the makers knew the great
object ion to salting in Kngland, and (he
loss which some shippers have to sutler
through that little item, salt, I think
they would he inure careful what sail
they use. Procure the best and I'mesl
sail you can possibly get, and see that
it is well and finely ground before going
on the blitter. A great many butter
makers have the idea that salt pre
serves the butter, and lienee they think
by putting plenty of salt in, their hulter
W ill he sin e lo keep. Now, lids is a
mistake, as sail is only for a seasoning
and to counteract the elleet of what
little buttermilk may he left in the but
ter. If everything were all right, and
no buttermilk left, hulter would keep
without any salt by being kept from the
air. Kt.glisli consumers of Canadian
butter are so accustomed to using a
fresh, lightly salted butter, that when
they come to ii'c onr butter, in which
yon can feel the salt gritting between
your teeth, it completely disgusts them
w 11 1 1 < 'anadian butler.
Mathematics and Medicine.
Mark Twain in Allunlir for November
I Says Among other talks to-day. it
! came out that whale ships carry no
i doctors. Die captain adds (lie doctor
ship to ins own duties. He not only
gives medicines, (ml sets broken limbs
after notions of ids own, or saws them
off and sears the stump w hen (imputa
tion seems best. The captain is pro
vided with a medicine chest, with the
medicines numbered instead of named.
A hook of directions goes with this, it
describes diseases and symptoms, and
Isays: “(live a teaspoonful of No. U
once an hour," or, "(live ten grains of
j No. 1-every half hour,” < le. One of
; our sea captains came across a skipper
in the north Pacific, who was in a slate
jof great surprise and perplexity. Said
lie; “There's something rotten about
lids medicine-chest business. One of
my men was sick nothing much the
I matter. J looked in the hook; it said
give him a teaspoonfiil of No. 1/5. I
went to the medicine chest and J see I
was out of No. 1/i. I judged I’d got to
get up a combination somehow, tlint
I would fill the hill, so I hove into the
fellow half a teaspoonfiil of No. H and a
half a teaspoonfiil of No. 7, and I’ll he
j hanged if it didn't kill him in fifteen
minutes] There's something about tins
medicine-chest system that's too many
for me,' -
Tlu* Now A nrk brewers are hop ping
mail at the enforcement of the excise
I'he cable tolls us licit live hundred
I'ottim operatives recently struck in
Kngland. Tliis must he a case of out
Son. Mamma ’ exclaimed a little one,
a'' puss, will) arching and elevated rml
der, strutting around the table; " son,
Kitt\ s mit so imii'li slm can't slml hot
Professor "Iu ono o\ ening 1 counted
twenty seven mi’ti'ors sitting on mv pi
a a. I lass expresses great astonish
moot at (lm sociable ■ 1 1 ar:i■ 1 1' r of heav
i uly hoilic
Mariali’ Maiiuli 1 please slot mo
in 1 ." said a man to liis wifo. who was
looking out of Urn w unlow watching him
living to opi'ii tlm iloor with a tooth
pick. " Ish tioail on my key, anil it’sh
all llalti'iii'il out."
Till' coldest St onu wave of Urn season
wa experienced by a young man from
Syracuse, who I'seorteil an Kusl Koine
mil home Sunday night, ami was tie
• eeti'il hy her father just as he was put
I mp his mustache w here it would do her
the most piod. ft uhic Sniliiul.
" AA hen a gii 1 gets mail ami rises from
a tellovv 's knee," say s an exchange, " hiiL
thinks heller ol it ami pics hack again
that’s wii.u they call a relapse," And
here we haw hecn working for dear life
to keep oil a relapse under the iiupres
sion tiiat it was someway related to
cholera morhus, Itoim Stnfinrl.
"One ol the must versatile ladies
that i'\'cr graced the Hcadwood stage,"
lias paeked her kit, "lit out Iroiu the
land ol the howling wilderness," and is
eii route lor (’hieapi, w here she will
"chaw" scenery and "whoop it upon
old lei psichorc. So stales a personal
m the Itlaek Mills (Vuimpie/i, which la
mi nis her departure
" IJi'll on, silver moon." warhled i
youth henealh the window of his loved
one, when the 11 ui‘i n of his thoughts
solily tai-eii the sash and murmured
A mi had heller roll on something hel
li r than a nun I y two ■ < nt moon, \\ and
lid in. if V 01l evpi'et lo get up to pa , hi)
I s hill'll money ,he is. the w indow slid
down, and the ilemoriili/.ed silver liih
slid oil', coining execrations in the Itland
atmosphere. (\nn. Ihillrlhi.
A " I'igger," from (’iililornin, enlogls
iug Iheelimate, says " There's a inoiin
lain there the Sawyer Navadny limy
call it with a valley on each side of il
the one hot. and t'other cold. W ell 1
(lit on the top of lhal mountain with a
double harreled gun, and you can, with
out movin', kill either summer or wintei
game, jest us you will." “ What ! him
yon ever tried il ?" "Tried ill often
and should have done pretty well hul
for one thing." " Well, what was that V"
" 1 wanted a dog lhal irouhl klidiil f>vlh
rlinuilru. The last dog 1 had frotr off' hi*
fail while 'pullin' on the summer side
lie didn’t gel enlirely out of the winter
side, yon see.”
Tis the iliileel voice of a fair Colorado
girl, speaking to her nohle brother, who
has heen out all night: " Nixy Koeks,
that still's too thin ; you see I am up lo
sin l ll’; you hel Tin on to the hoys now .
and you might ns well cheese ymn
racket a 1 lot l l staying up with a sick
friend. I heard ahont your drinking
three straights and a whisky sour ai
Mill lives saloon, and then weld down
to old Monitions place and give him
the linger for a hlue .blaster ami a hot
rum punch. When yon were playing
lifli'en-hull pool with Ike Smith, didn't
you get stuck for six straight games
and the drinks and stand him oil
(or the whole hnsiness? Oh! hul
you're a slaver, and the first thing you
know you Will have a had ease of the
Jims, and then everybody aland town
will say you were a pietty good fellow,
hut too iiitti'h of a kid to run with thin
Cinisiinipt inn of Tobacco.
The lu/iihro I‘lnnt says : " The entire
mass of lohaeco which is annually eon
sinned in smoking, smifl'mg, and in
chew ing on the earth is four hillion of
pounds, manifestly too high an estimate
for from twelve to fifteen hundred mil
lions of inhabitants. hut us take the
half as the more probable, anil let us
suppose the tobacco leaves transformed
into roll lohaeco, at 0!,.., .xipeiitis
created which, with n diameter ol two
ini lies, and followii the direction of
the equator, could wind itself around
the earth thirty times, l<et us suppose
that the tobacco is formed into tablets
similar lo the chocolate tablets, ami
which, indeed, is the shape which the
chewing tobacco of sailors and Yankees
takes, and we have a colossal pile,
worthy of being placed the third largest
of the pyramids of tJizeh, that of Myk
erines, and as massive and as high as
that old regal edifice. Let ns grind all
the tobacco into snuff, and let ns pie
lure to ourselves the sad ease that an
evil equinoctial wind one lino morning
blows the snuff over the ocean, and
showers il on one of the (lerman Stales,
we are certain more than one of the
Jllipnlian Slates would have much diffi
culty in recovering its existence hy
■hoveling away the ■miff."
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