The Bryan eagle. [volume], March 02, 1911, Image 2

About The Bryan eagle. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1880-1913

Image provided by: University of North Texas; Denton, TX

                
A Urj C:t
! c :o of tbe highland boat tliat
.Ulel for tbe Stuart cause, which
, jar j Prince Charlie headed, eppar
'r lj was that heaven hclpa those who
i t.'-r themselves liberally. They levied
- toll oa the henroost, stable and, ac
, ' cording to the author of "The Land of
Romance," even on the pockets of the
Covenantors.
At Swartbholm a parry of those ma
rauders overhauled the house of a tai
lor, and when one of them was about
to cut up a web of homespun that had
UKen nts runey ine pood wire oarncs
1j remonstrated.
"A day'll come when ye'll ha' tae
pay for that." she solemnly assured
mm.
o .1 . . , l. rv i i
"An' when will she pe hating to do
that? be asked.
"At t)l0 lllMt lnv " u.lM chn
"An that will pe a fery goot louj?
credit, the robber coolly returned
-sue wass going to e only taklug a
cont, Imt now she will ie taking a
. waistcoat ns well."
A Mountain In the Skv.
Somewhere many miles away from
mm eartn an enormous mountain
twenty miles high Is flying throuch
pace. The mountain Is known astro
nomically as the planet Eros. Tho or
dinary man has long taken It for
granted mat all the planets are more
or less round In shape. The small
planet Eros, however, is an exception
to this rule. Accordincr to the latest
astronomical Information, It Is a mere
mountain In space, "without form mid
void." and ns it turns noon its mW
first one corner and then nuother Is
presented to view. These small worlds
(few are over ten or twenty miles
across) ere not large enough to have
sufficient gravity to draw their struo.
ture into symmetry and remain as
when launched Into space mammoth
meteorites. A tantalizing fact for as
tronomers is that Eros rnssod virv
close to us alwut Jan. 24. 1RTJ4 lefore
the planet was recognised and that
quite so near an approach Is not due
again mi r.'Ta.
"The Mint's Blown Up."
I was sittins on the edire of mv
loosening the heel of one of my rubber
boots with the toe of the other, when
suddenly through the stillness of the
Sleeping to-vn. from tho power house
half a mile away, came a low and ris
ing note, the great siren whistle In the
power nouse. Almost fascinated. 1
listened on the great note rose higher
and more shrill and died nwnv nsnln.
One blast meant a fire In the town, two
blasts fire In the buildings at the mire
and three blasts, the most terrible of
nil, a disaster or trouble in the mine.
pause, the sound came again and once
more rose and died awny. I did not
move, but there was a sudden cold
ness that came over me as once mor
for the third time, tho deep note broke
out on the quiet Mr. Almost Instan
taneously the loud jingle of my tele-
phone brought me to my feet. I took
down the receiver. "The mine's blown
up," said a woman's voice. Atlantic.
Eiyins No.
The author of 'Tut MeCarty." a book
of verse with n sottlne: of nroso. shows
how naturally some of the Irishmen of
Antrim dilute tho wine of narrative
with the water of verbiage. In the ox
cerpt belov-"Tho Way We Tell n
Story" the diluent is used with u par
ticularly free hand:
Says I to him. I snys. says I.
Snys I to him, I says.
The thlnsr, says I. I Bays to him,
la Just, says I, this ways.
I hev, says I. a Rre't rspeck
. tor you nnd for your breed.
And nllVtillnir T Plld T mavm
.I'd do, I wud Indoad.
I don"t know any man. t says,
I'd do It for, lays i.
As fast, I e:iys, us for yoursel.
That's tell In" ye no lie.
Thei-c's'nat'ght, says I, I wudn't do
To plase your fcyther's son.
But thl", I snys, ye see, says I,
I says,. It can't be done.
C:rls cf Cm Pari Cu
Araong humorous storied of tin. n-
la law court it Is told bow a well
knowu lawyer, M: Aleni Itousseau,
was once pleading a rather tiresome
case and, noticing that tbe Judges were
paying uo attention to him, said, "As
the president Is falling asleep 1 sus
pend my BDeecu." But the 1 intra bad
just woke up and cried, "And I sus
pend you from practicing for all
months." Nothins daunted, the law.
yer retorted- "Well. I suspend niveolf
forever and ever," and, gathering up
bis brief and cap, be left the court
and never appeared again.
A Paris barrister. M. Clerv. however.
was more vigorous. Seeing that the
president and the assessors were nil
vdeep. bo stoiied. and. dealinir a tre
mendous Mow on the desk lu front of
him that woke everybody un with a
start, he cried, "Yesterday at this same
hour I wus snvlnir" And the whole
bench rubbed their eyes and r.sked each
other if thtyr had really slept through
tweaty-four hours.
The same counsel was pleading at
Versailles on a cold ilnv and romtit-L-iul
that the iudci-s were all turning morn
and more around toward a stove that
gave out a welcome heat. "The trlbu-
nr.i bcblud which I have the honor of
Breaking" brought them all right about
luce at once.
He Had a Claim.
In a certain town was a vounrr law
yer whose father was very rich and
who had been sent to an eastern law
school. Since his graduation he had
done uothlng except open an office be
cause he bad plenty of niouey. This
young lawyer was proposed for mem
bership in the local Cre company.
e cannot elect him." one of the
members protected. "The constitution
of our company says that the mem
bers or it must sloop and live here in
the city, and he lives out of town on
a rarm and not In the city at all lla
would be of no valuo at all In enso of
a fire at night He doesn't sleep here
at night."
"No." replied his proposer: "it Is tnm
he doesn't sleep here at night, but lie
sleeps here lu his office all day."
And they elected him on that cround.
rhlladelphJa Saturday Evening Post.
The Simple Maid.
Twas In a simple country town, and
the mold of all work was simple and
Innocent In sympathy. When she re
turned from shonpln? half a sovereign
short lu her change Mrs. Mnngo
Chutuey was naturally Incensed.
Go back to each shop, you careless
girl," she told Uio wcepiug maid, "and
tell them you Jure half a soverclirn
short In your money and they must
give it you."
Susan went and was back ncain in
half an hour. Enterlns her mistress'
sanctum, she laid five half sovereigns
on the table before her. Faithful as
always, she had carried out Mrs.
Mnngo-Cbutnc.r s Instructions to the
letter, and each shopkeeper, fearful of
doing wrong and hurting a fellow crea
ture, had thrust the misslns coin unoii
the bewildered girl. London Answers.
V.'atertpeicta,
A WStrt flout Is a ininlataM trim m An
rlginatluf la a strong upward draft
oi air wnicn occurs above tbe surface
ot a boay or comparatively warm wa
ter, lu effect first becomes visible In
circular motion at tbe point la ths
clouds to which It ascends. This be
comes a irtlrl. which condeuses the
vaiwr at Its center, causing the per
tlon of the cloud there to dron down
ward In the shape of a rlcantlc lellv
bag. At the same time the continuing
upward draft Increases the rapidity of
Its orikiual swirl and the condensed
vapor caught within It uutll tho
ascending and descending masses M:
to form the waterspout. Xecessarilr
by this process the air beneath the
spout is rarefied, and thus where the
phenomenon occurs at sea the water
always seems to be sucked up into It.
aitnougn tins is not really tbe case to
any considerable extent.. For similar
reasons where a waterspout or torna
do passes over a bulldlug It does tuost
of its damage by cxhaustlug the elr
outside, causing what Is within to ex
pand and blow the structure to piece
The Whits Whale.
The white whale, or belura. Is r.i
arctic cetacean and closely allied to i!-.!
narwhal. It Is pure white lu color.
twelve to eighteen feet long, whale'.lke
lu form, with a hug& niurzle und nu
merous sharp conical teeth.
The white whale swims with ex
traordinary speed by doubling Its huge
tall under Its bodv and then strlklni?
out with It Scientists who have stud
ied It In Its natural environs say that
It Is able to catch the swiftest of fish
es, often pursuing Its prey far up the
northern rivers. It is gregarious and
moy be seen nt times In herds of forty
or fifty.
These herds not infreouentlv mimbol
orouud boats In the arctic seas, nnd
tho natives of Greenland often capture
them with harpoons or nets. The flesh
ct tbe white whale, In fact. Is a con
slderable source of food supply to
them. From it also Is derived one of
the finest grades of commercial oil.
The skins are tanned nnd the leather
sold in the trade as "porpolso hide."
New York Times.
. Sing a Song of Sixpence.
The Londou Globe attempts an ex
planation of the rhyme "Sing n Song
of Sixpence." Here it Is: "The four
and twenty blackbirds represent the
four nnd twenty hours. The bottom
of tbe pie is the world. The top crust
represents the sky. The opening of
the pie Is the dawn of the day, when
the birds begin to sing, and surely
such a sight is fit for a king. The
king In his counting house counting
out M? mnnur fa Mia cun Tlia mnmir
I the king is counting represents the
golden sunshine. The queen, who sits
In the parlor. Is the moon. Tho honey
sho Is eating is the moonlight. Tbe
Industrious maid who is working in
the enrden before the sun has .risen
Is tho day dawn, and the clothes she
hangs out are clouds. The bird that
so tragically ends the sons by nliiplnz
oir her nose is the hour of sunset."
Free His HIM !a KI V::j.
Among curious wills that of a e
J In Dr. DunlttD. a Canadian, has nttn
been quoted. It probably contained
some or ine most maliciously express
ed bequests on record. To one limth.
er tbe doctor left his books so that be
might learn to rend and aceulro mm.
mon sense. To another brother be left
bis big silver watch that the said
brother might know tbe hour at which
men ought to get up of a morning. To
nis brotner-lu-law he left his best pipe
"In gratitude that be married my sis
ter Maggie, whom no man of taste
would ever hove tukco." and to tho
eldest son of a friend he left a silver
tankard lest If he left It to the friend
himself, who was a rahld ttntnw
the latter might melt It down to cast
temperance medals. To one of his sis
ters he left u silver diiuk cup "for ....
sous best known to herself;" to anoth
er the family Bible, so that she might
leaiu as much vf Its spirit ns she al
ready knew of Its letter aud become a
better Christian, und to his i?l.ii.st
ter u five acre Held to cousole her fur
being married to a man that aim
to henpeck.-Chnmbers' Journal.
A Pair of Cheerful Liars.
The crowd lu the little count
----- ewit
was watchlug the ralu wheu Deacon
vwtnerspoou remarked that
It ralu p.bout as hard ns nn-i..iv -..
had seen it rain. Somebody said:
Deacon, how hard did von p.p
it ralu!"
"Well, sir." said the deacon, "nn
upou a time, when I was at home, we
had nu old cider barrel laying out hi
the yard with both ends out nnd the
bungholo up. aud. would von hoiim n
it rained so hard Into that buughule
wur water couldn't run out of iu.n,
eiuls fast enough, aud It swelled u
nnd busted!"
Then ISeuhea lleurv snok nn it..
said he'd never seen it ralu very hard.
uui ue a seen some mighty cold weath
er, somebody said. "Rube, how ...,M
did you ever see It get?"
He said. "Well. sir. one tlni when i
was living down In Pickaway conntr
la hog kllliug time, we had a kettle of
boning water settlnir on the sim-p.
and we took it out l:i the vard. and It
frozi; so doggone quick the Ice was
hot '-.National Monthly.
I J Lj ceI encatcpei . near 1.1s
t;tion on tbe ttx.ii ot the. iimi.
Loua. From tbat encampment grew"
uie vniage or rort Lesne, and when
Toussalnt L'Ourertum died tnoro than
100 years ago bis friends decided to
remain In France. The passing of
years and Intermarriages have trans
formed tbe settlement Into a Fren h
Tillage of colored folk, all of whom
are enfranchised.
Poetry 'and Pleasure.
The poet writes under nnn rpMtrti'IIo-i
only namely, the uocesslty of givhiT
Immediute pleasure. Nor let this ne
cessity of producing Immediate pict
ure bo considered ns n deernil ni.m ,.
mo poets art. it Is far otherwise, p
Is an acknowledgment of the b:'ai:;.
of the universe, an acknowledgment
the more sincere because nyt formal,
but Indirect; It Is u task light und e.w.y
to him who looks at the world in ft.
spirit of love Furl her. It Is u bor.mjce
paid to the. native und naked dlg:ilt;:
of mau. to the grand elementary m
clple of pleasure, by which ho feelj
ana lives nnd moves. William Words
worth,
Ths Sprotacled Bear.
, . The spectacled bear of Ecuador is
so called Ucause of a patch of whlta
around oath eye. which makes the
unlmal look as though lie was peering
through a pulr of great spectacles.
In size and general color the spec
tacled Lear looks not unlike the Ameri
ca u black liear. But its hair is very
shaggy. At each side of the he:id U n
white bar, which gives the r.nlinal the
appearance of wearing u halter. But
the most distinctive feature is the
white around the eyes.
The Offendinn Black Bottla.
A church member in a lonely district
or NisKatehewnn absented himself
from services for some mouths. On
being approached on the subleet he
said he was sorry, but it wus impossi
ble to attend any more. lie was
pressed to give reasons and at length
said it was owing to tho bad conduct
of the superintending clergyman nnd
catechist.
He and others had witnessed them
drinking when driving round on tlieir
visits. They had passed n black bot
tle from hand to hand.' It was inino.-
sible to attend the ministry of such
men. Inquiries proved that the of
fending "bottle" was n pair of field-
glasses with which the drivers sur
veyed the surrounding country and
tried to locate the various churches,
shacks nnd trails. Sunday nt Home.
Black Inhabitants of Franca. ,
Lying so much off the beaten track,
tho village of Port Lesne, lu the Jura
department of prance. Is visited by
but few from the outside world, anil
consequently, thi3 tiny community of
men und wetneu of color is hut iiltie
known. It Is-not a large village, for
its Inhabitants number only about n
hundred, but every one Is either blael;
or copper colored. It owes its origin
to the fact that about a century ug
tho famous negro chief. Toussali'i!
L'Ouverture. was brought from II:.lii
nnd Imprisoned In Fort tie Joux.
Many of his friends, all negroes, f0l
In For It Either Way.
Minister Now. Tommy, suppose tvou
did something naughty and were asked
Hyou did It. Y hat would you say ?
Tommy-1 dunuo.
Minlster-You don't know If Why-'
why, what would happen If you t'uld
a lie?
Tommy The devll'd git me. '
MInlster-That's right. And what If
you told the truth?
Tommy-Pd git the devll.-Toledo
Blade. t
A Killing Joke.
"I mdo Dr. Kit! fern, the eminent
surgeon.j very angry when I met him
one winter day enjoying a spin over
the snow."
"How did you make him mad?"
"I congratulated him on bis sense of
the fitness of things In taking advan
tage of every chance to go on n alelgh
Ing expedltlon."-IIultlraore American
A Rang of Possibilities.
"I have leeu told." st.Id th confident
performer, "that I make my vloliu
sound like the human voice."
"Yes." replied the candid friend, ' leir
there are so many kinds of huiu.m
voices. "-Washington Star.
NO CL j; 5 PECAN QAP .
"ire-wet roesers.
D ,lBl APelLJed'Prs.
Paris. TexaartTh 7vt. .....
who 7 fT the
who Saturday I nlzht a
postoffice at Pecan, Gap, TXftg( "
l nearly f 1000 In cash and other
property. . . .
BIG "VOTE IN HOUSTON PRIMAR.
By Associated Press
HOU8tOn. TpYO OO n!u-
Coming Soon, "The Man on the Box-
large talented array of players
whose names are known only with at
tractions of the tetter class form the
lnTh"a" on the Box" is underlined
When a Great Man Dies.
There can be but austere and serious
thoughts in all hearts when a sublime
spirit makes Its majestic entrance Into
another life, when one of those holns
who have lone soared above the crowd
on the visible wings of genius, spread
Ing nil at once other wlnzs which we
did not see. plunges swiftly Into the
unknown.-From Hugo's Funeral Ora
tion on Balsac.
Through the backbone
ot lexas
Waco $3.45 round 'trip. Tickets
o-i sale Feb. 8, and motninj cf the
9th, limit Feb. 12th.
Dallas 16.60 round trip. Tickets
on sale Feb. 13, and morning of
the 14, limit February 17.
Houston $3.60 round trin. Tick.
ets on sale Fob. 13,. and morning
ot the 14. limit Feb. 18.
Mardi Gras, New Orleans $15.40
roun'd trip. Tickets on tale Fk '
21, to 27, inclusive. Limit March
11, privilege of an extension to
March 27th by paying $1.00 fee.
S. H. HARRIS,
Local Agent
J
J L. Fount.in E. J. Fountain
FOUNTAIN BROS.
Lands and Loans
St.ck and Bond Brokers
All chaiacte- of securitiei bought
and to'd.
LAhD NOTES A SPECtALTt
Attachment.
The schoolteacher Mas trying to Il
lustrate the difference, between plants
and animals.
"Plants." she explained, "are not sus
ceptible of attachment to man as ani
mals are."
"How about burs, teacher?." piped r;
small boy who had passed the sum
mer in the country. Chicago News. .
Net Always.
, "Whenever I hear the suffrage com
bated." said nn English lord, "on th?
score of woman's protected, sheltered.
petted lire I think cf a poor woman I
once questioned in England.
"This poor creature had been beaten
by her husband in n drunken fury.
The man had been drunk, it appears,
for ten days running.
'"My good friend,' I srdd to her.
'does your husband always drink like
that?" ,
" 'Xo, my lord,' she answered. 'Some
times 1 gets hout o' work.' "
Traditions of Mother Shiotan.
Of all British prophets Mother Ship-
ton Is beyond doubt the most ce'p-
bratod. She v.ns. In fact, all thnt a
prophet and witch should be. iu
strange contrast to the serious nnd
scientific nostrndnmns. TIip flir who
was born the sky became dark nnd
gloomy nnd, according to her blogra
nher. "belch t out nothlncr for nn hour
but flames, thundering after n most
hideous manner." ner nersonnl nn
pearance. described by her admiring
Diograpuer in iuij. is scnrceiy natter
ing: "ner physiognomy was so m!s
shnnen that it is nltoirother Imnosolhto
to express runy in words or lor tne
most ingenious to lino ner In colors,
though many persons of eminent quail-
ncotlons in that line hnve often at
tempted it. but without success."
metropolitan Magazine.
A Wittv Retort.
Au. Englishman in Dublin was nsked
by nn Irish cab driver if he wished to
ride throiiKu the city.
"Xo," replied the Englishman; "I nm
noie to walk."
"Ah. well," remarked the jehu, "may
yer honor long be able, but seldom
willing!"
Maks Children Happy.
The first duty toward children Is to
mako them happy. If you have not
mnde them happy you have wronged
them. Xo other good they may get
con make up for that. Charles Dux-ton.
Hie Reward.
Lawyer Brown -So I celled the
Judge n linr. Lawyer Joues And then
what did you do? Lawyer Brown
Thirty days.-Tolcdo Blade.
And the Grounds.
Lady Customer Do you -keep co"es
In tho bean? New Clerk Upstairs,
madam. This Is the ground floor.
Trincoton Tiger.
CHHH4 al r u
. viywv inu rrovvru,
1 "You may not get any more business
rroui me. I ve bought a law book."
"I won't worry," responded the law
yer. "In that case I shall probably
get more business than ever." Wash
ington Herald.
A Tip For John, i
Mr. Crimsonbenk nere's an item
which says the swan outlives any oth
er bird, In extreme cases reaching 300
years. Mrs. Crimsonbenk And, re
member, John, the swans live on wa
ter. '
VVhich Was Far Worse.
TVilllaoisou Does your wife always
nave te last word? Henderson Weil,
If she doesn't, old fellow, she looks it.
jgmart Set
An Old English Inn.
The Seven Stars Is an Inn or pub
lic house in Manchester, England,
which has held n license continuously
Ince 1370. It served as the meeting
place for the Guy Fawkes band of
conspirators.
Up and Downs.
Xot every statesman takes his dis
missal with the humor cf the Due
d'Enernon. who fell Into disgrace with
Henry of Xavarre. Descending one
clay tlie great staircase of the Louvre,
he met Uichelleu ascending it. and on
the cardinal askinc indifferently if
there wns anything new taking place
D'Epernon replied. "Xothins:. except
that, as you see. I nm going down nnd
you are irolnir un!" Mr. ninnndolle
Burton tells the story iii "The Fate of
Henry of Xnvnrre."
71 (0) Tl Tl) as a ProsPerous year and I
rt. ( am intJeecl Thankful to my.
J1QJ' JIMJ fHends and the public for their
Mtaritorftfw;,,,;,'! very hberal patronage.' The
New Year finds my store better prepared to meet the
wants of the people than ever before. It is filled with
a complete line of HIGH CLASS
Advanced Fast.
"Mike, didn't you have some trouble
when you landed nt Xew ork?"
Tllrll n l!f unf"
"You hadn't any password admitting
you to the country, had you?
"Xo, sor, hut before I had been in
the country tin days I had the grip."
Chicago Tribune.
Not Always Desirable.
"Shall we advertise for a man with
experience?"
"Well. I don't know. The last man
had so much experience that we
couldn't tench him anything." ritts-
burg Post.
Warranted Not ts Fail.
Doctor Four wife needs outdoor ex
ercise more than nnytkinir else.' Hus
bandBut she won't CO out. What nm
I to do? Doctor Give her plenty cf
money to. shop with.
An obstinate man does not held
opinions: they hold him. Butlet.
Knew All About It.
"Do any perquisites come in your wav
at the office?" "Xot much they dop't.
We hnve a husky Janitor who' throws
them kind of fo!ks out." Baltimore
American.
Cuffs and the Laundress.
Why are laundry women tho nmat
forgiving of their sex? Because tbe
more cuffs you give them tbe more
they will do for you.
n
n t-7
17
embracing everything carried in a furniture ' store.
Let me show you my siock and quote prices, that is
all I ask. A full line of
Undertakers Goods
also carried. Hoping that 1911 may bring prosperity
to all, I am yours for business,
n Ji n t)
535