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20 SAN ANTONIO UGH AND GAZETTE Founded January 20, 1881. Evening Daily. Members Associated Press. Sunday Morning G D. ROBBINS Publisher TELEPHONE CALLS. Business Office and Circulation Department, both phones.. ITS Editorial Department both phones isos TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION. By Carrier or Mall. Dally and Sunday, one year (In advance) Dally and Sunday, one month Sunday Edition, one year -g Single Copies, Dally or Sunday BC Entered at the Postoffice at San Antonio. Texas, as Second-class Matter. The S C. Beckwith Special Agency, Representatives ' New York. Tribune Bldg. Chicago. Tribune Bldg. TO SUBSCRIBERS. It is important when desiring the address of your paper changed to give both old and new addresses. Should delivery be Irregular, please notify the office. Either telephone 176. PUBLISHER’S NOTICE. Subscribers to The Light and Gazette are requested to pay money to regular authorized collectors only. Do not pay car riers, as errors are sure to result. The Light and Gazette is on sale at hotels and news-stands throughout the United States. U 1 IiFILLAIO CF ZNYFAPERIN SAN ANTONIU ______________ Senator? Gore, the blind _ member of the senate from Senator WC, Oklahoma is a remarkable 3 Champion man. He is remarkable in many ways. He is blind and to him are closed all the ordinary methods of absorbing in formation yet he is one of the best informed men in the country. He is surrounded by brilliant men and yet he •bines as brilliantly in debate as the brightest, and as a dear and logical thinker he is without a peer in the upper body of congress. In debate and in his resolutions he has a way of getting to the bottom of things at one deep sweep; which is a remarkable trait to find in the senate where there : seems at necessary times an avnlanehe of words and a tread mill progress. Still more remarkable politically, however, than any other qualification) for fame is his honesty of purpose, his freedom from entanglements with forces that would prevent his being a true representative of the people and bis earnest endeavor j to be right on every piece of legislation. Senator Gore is responsible for a resolution offered in the - senate on January 28 calling for information concerning the rate paid by the government to the railroads for transport ing the mails. This is his resolution in part: That the committee be directed to ascertain and re port to the senate the comparative rates paid by "the United States government and by the express eom- | panics to the principal railroad companies in the United States for similar services in transporting publications as “second-elass mail matter.” This resolution met with opposition—not open, frank, honest opposition—but the devious honeyed kind that a trained statesman knows so well how to use. Senator Gore, however, was not abashed. He stood his ground and sent a hot shot, into the camp of the men seeking to block his search for information. It «degtre-.ofs«be<a]>ponerits of the resolu- tion to bury Ft in committee and forget it. a fate that has overtaken many pieces of legislation of importance to the people. Ju referring to his experiences with resolutions that went to committees, the senator from Oklahqpm said: “I may* submit as an additional reason for my appar ent insistence that my experience in regard to referring such resolutions to committees has not been entirely satisfactory. I have sometimes seen the legend of despair written above the portals of these committee rooms which suggests to the authors of such resolutions, ‘Leave hope behind all ye who enter here.’ If in this case this committee should prove to he a cemetery, I shall move the resurrection of the resolution after three days. ‘‘lt seems to me that the information called for by the resolution ought to be exceedingly desirable not only to every member of the senate, but to the country at large. It would perhaps be the basis of legislation at the present session of congress. It goes directly to the allegation that the deficit in the postoffice department is due to the low rate now prevailing on second-class mail matter. A different view is entertained on this subject by different senators. From my own point of view, I regard this deficit, even if it were due to these low postal rates, as a kind of taxation for public educn tion and for the dissemination of knowledge and news among the people of the country.” It will be interesting to note results and see if Mr. Gore, the senate, and the nation at large gets this much needed but I apparently little desired information. Why is it that Lillian Rnssoll must be continually re minded by critics that she is getting old. Hardly a play censor of the press starts his criticism with: “Well do 1 remember back in the 80s when ” and so forth ad lib. It’s bad enough to be stepping along in years without having some one dinging it at. you all the time. The cat-like tread and the fine Italian hand and the sub til skill and the cloven hoof and so forth of the beef trust Is evident in the latest attempt to popularize beefsteak. They are giving sirloins as prizes at whist parties these days, and it is intimated to be a ruse of the beef trust's press agent to familiarize the common people with beef products. . — — Press reports indicate that there was an attempt to scare Glavis out of his boots when he appeared to testify before the Ballinger-Pinchot investigating committee, but that ‘‘the boy from the west” refused to stampede. Senators and other big bugs tried to put the fear in his heart, hut lie told a simple straightforward story that appealed to the nation and in a phrase of the sidewalk, rather “put one over” ou the upholstered legislators whose stage settings failed to work. ♦ ' It >• not improbable that the churchgoers of Austin will hear some remarkably fine sermons today in view of the fact that laymen preachers of San Antonin will occupy sev era) pulpits there. '• a * The Lenten season in conjunction with the meat bovcott ought to make the packers take notice. They have never fared this combination before. # _ ‘‘.Jeanette Ford, woman in Warriner caw. scored,” de dares a contemporary. Mrs. Ford has been scoring for sev eral years past and at last count had $84,000 runs to her cred st. For her Warriner was better than a block of beef trust stock. BUNDAY, ______________ Tn looking about for di- rs. tsnx riru c j vorcc grounds, Gen. Chas. The Wife Who Saved Miller> the standard $4OO a Day , I millionaire of Fhinklin Pa., has found that his wife saved $4OO a day, Sundays included. We think that this breaks the record. Divorces have been brought because one of the parties took a bath on Christmas only, because of cold feet, because of eating soup with a knife and drinking the finger-bowl water, because of cross eyes and because of a lot of other ridiculous ‘‘incom patibilities,*’ but here’s the first ease where a wife is going to be hauled over the common pleas coals for saving the money. Why, general, you’ve got a jewel, an angel, a sure thing, not to say a martial prodigy and phenomenon. O Lord! how few of us there are here in Texas who wouldn’t put in a safety deposit vault a wife who would save $4OO • day, Sun days included! And even if saving $4OO per diem were bad per se, who can blame the poor womanf Sho’s had to live with a Stand ard Oil magnate who has squeezed millions out of other peo ple and done his share of hoarding. She's only followed his example, only she has squeezed him, individually, instead of the oil consumers at large. What ‘‘goes” with the geese ought to ‘‘go” with the gander. And, while we’re at it, we want to warn the court that is to handle this Miller case. If wives are' to be hauled through the horrors of a divorce trial because they save money, there’s going to be a boycott in this country beside which our little affair'with meat dealers will be a mere gurgle. The girls will boycott Cupid and the eligible men will follow suit, because the courts will have decided that a husband has legal right to make any kind qf an ass of him self he chooses. Does a Man Own His Own Body!” asks an exchange. We own ours. It s kind of community propertv among the trusts, and they charge a stiff price for its use. * An insurgent gunboat has beeh bombarding Greytown, but so far no one has been hit or hurt except a few sailors on board the gunboat. The story of the rescue of the forty six sailors from the sinking ship Kentucky is so thrilling that one is almost in clined to believe that it was stolen from the stage. Edwin Balmer will not have an excuse for writing another play. | As Others View ff THE BACK-FROM-ELBA CLUB ; Mr. Pinehot has been chosen president of the National i Conservation association—an organization which is frequent ; ly referred to in these days as the ‘‘citadel of the -Baek | from-Elba elub. ’ ” The dispatch which brings this interesting information ■ mentions several other prominent members of the organiza j tion—the former secretary of the interior, Mr. Garfield: An drew Carnegie, Dr. Charles W. Eliot, a gentleman named Stimson, Mr. Fisher of Chicago, and a few more. The dispatch says, moreover, that headquarters have been established for the club at Washington and that a vigorous fight will be made to carry out the Roosevelt policies and ] also to stimulate a demand for a third term. ‘‘What hope.” we naturally ask* ‘‘can a heterogeneous i combination of library, peace conference, five-foot bookshelf, I Chicago uplift, trust-busting and forestry sentiments leave [ for these persons who desire the peace, quietude and unity necessary for the development of a Roosevelt political or ganization!” Can we expect large Carnegie library to maintain good relations with a five-foot bookshelf—with an institution whose basic idea is a practical denial of the usefulness, or at least the educational necessity of its neighbor? Can a peace conference feel wholly at ease on the same bench with a Roosevelt trust buster? , However, further on in ,the dispatch there is a statement that partially dissipates the doubts as to the organization ’a making at least some sort of political showing. This state ment is brief but extremely significant. It is to the effect that Mr. Carnegie will ‘‘spend money like water” to fur ther the objects of the organization. This naturally changes the outlook. Almost any sort pf organization can make a noise if Mr. Carnegie will put up a lot of first-mortgage steel bonds for the detonations. In such a case interior harmony is not so necessary. Even as suming a certain coldness between the library and the five foot bookshelf, or that the uplift objects seriously to the for estry being the more conspicuous, the pyrotechnical exhibi tion can be given just the same. Of course, however, all this is on the assumption that meantime Mr. Taft does not bust the steel trust and thus prostrate Mr. Pinchot’s hostile machinations at once by de priving Andrew and the Back-from-Elba club of the sinews of war.—Chicago Inter-Ocean. , SAN ANTONIO LIGHT AND GAZETTE THE HALL ROOM B lISJIII ■ wwwwwwwwwww ■■ ■ ALL SORTS i Copyright. 1909, by I Post Publishing Co. £ By NEWTON NEWKIRK. • Josh Wise Saya: ‘‘Th’ only people who haven't cried ont ag'in* th' divorce evil are th’ ones most interested— th’ divorcees.” UNIVERSAL CORRESPONDENCE SCHOOL. Dear Newt —I have just been reading in a popular magazine the advertise ment of a well known school which teaches various trades and professions by means of correspondence. lam pained to note, however, that these trades and professions as taught are limited in number, and I want to know if you will go in with me on found ing a school which wifi teach by. cor respondence any vocation that can be conceived. It would be known as the Universal Correspondence School, and wb might advertise something after the following style: * ‘‘BE A HACK DRIVER! Hack driv ers earn good wages all the year round. Ohr correspondence course makes you a successful hack driver. The work is pleasant and profitable. Hundreds of hack "drivers are wanted on every cor ner. No fees in advance. Write to the Universal Correspondence School, San Antonio, Tex.” Or we might run in the varidbs magazines an advertisement something like the following: ‘‘Young man, why remain poor when you can be rich? You can qualify for a much larger salary than you are now earning by taking a course in our cor respondent's school. Mark an ‘X’ op posite the position below which you; are ambitious to fill, then cut this out and mail it to us for rates. Diplomas awarded in three weeks. Take our course and get a boost. POLITICIAN, BOOTBLACK, CROSSING SWEEPER, TICKET SWEEPER, ELEVATOR MAN, BUNDLE BOY, COLLECTOR OF ASHES, PEANUT MERCHANT, SEWER INSPECTOR, STRAPHANGER, CURB BROKER. SQUARE EGG DEALER, POSTHOLE PROMOTER, POTATQE MASHER, HAM ACTOR. OR ANY OTHER VOCAION. ‘‘Address Universal Correspondence School, San Antonio, Tex.” Are you willing, Newt, to furnish half the capital to start this school if you are permitted to share half the profits? Let me know immediately, be cause if you don’t come in, somebody i else will. WISE GUY. Marion, Tex. You don’t tell*me how much capital would be required, but I presume that $4 each would be a great plenty to start this Universal Correspondence School. With a working capital of $8 we could insert a small advertisement in a news paper, also purchase some letter heads, envelopes and stamps and we ought to have enough left to buy desk room in some office for a month. At the end of that lime we should have a handsome sum in the treasury—l speak to be treasurer! I don’t know much about the duties of a sewer inspector so if anybody de sires to take that course you will have to give them instruction. However, 1 can teach curb broking to a finish —I went broke myself there once and I can tell anybody else how t 4 do the same' thing. ’ 'Copyright. 1910. by the New Toth Krening Journal Pnbl:«hir.c Company.) Observant Citizen ‘•Now, Nettie, ;cmernber that 1 am to fjave at least seven.” “Oh, no, Tom, you can’t have but three at the most.” “But I want seven or eight.” ‘‘ I know, but than there are others. ’ ’ ‘‘But, Nettie, you can make it at least five, can’t you.” ‘‘Well, maybe I can, but if you don't be on hand you can't have them.” * ‘ Ob, I ’ll be there, don’t vou fear. ’ ’ No, this wasn’t a conversation about kisses, caramels or coughdrops. It was simply fragments that Observant Citi zen heard last night on a Sap depot car. The two were discussing a dance and the question before the house was how many was the young man entitled to? ‘‘At least one news kid has learned enough to let dogs alone,” said a man to Observant Citizen. ‘‘This afternoon 1 saw a bunch standing on the corner of Crockett and Alamu plaza. Along came a rather good-sized dog. One of the youngsters thought it would be l good joke to kick it. He did. ‘‘They pulled the dog off the kid after pants had been torn, shoes bitten through and boy badly scared. Inci dentally, ten perfedtly good Light and Gazettes were so badly used that their sale was impossible. The dog had simply not stood for the bluff ’and had called it good and hard. The boy was more frightened than hurt, but he will lot inoffensive dogs alone after this.” “ ‘Bah jove, but ’e's deueedly ilcvah, dontcherknowf ’ “ ‘Yaas, I daresay, and ’e’s devilish mean ’ ‘‘l have either beard this in a play, .end it in a book or else it emanated from my fertile brain, ” remarked a local playgoer. ‘At any rate it is lurking in my mind, and it seems to hang on my memory. As you can see it is part of a conversation between two Englishmen. I can picture the two, in evening dress, at a reception, having a quiet chat, the subject of which is a prominent and prosperous businessman. “‘CJevah’ and ‘mean’ are the two words that made an imprint on mv memory. The question that has been tossing about in iny mind is whether a man can be clever and mean at tho same time, or whether a clever man is mean or whether it is necessary for a man to be mean in order to be clover. ’ ’ SAN ANTONIO 21 YEARS AGO (From the Light, Feb. 6, 1889.) William Muth and Chris. Miller will leave for Paris in April to take in the exposition. An entertainment will be given in St. Luke’s Episcopal church tomorrow night by the young ladies. The election of officers for the La dies’ Aid society of Madison Square church, will take place at 4 o’clock this afternoon. • There will be a social gathering of the Young Mena Catholic union in St. Joseph’s hall tonight in honor of Fath er Pfefferkorn’s birthday. Frank Simmang was granted his fi nal naturalization papers this morning by the district clerk. The annnal election of officers of San Antonio, division, uniform rank, Knights of Pythias, takes place tonight. O. F. Fitzpatrick of Boerne, a both er of the fashionable English beaut)’, Mrs. Cornwallis-West, is visiting in the city. Henry Shelper, who has been ill at his homo for some time, is able to bo out again. BLISTERING. Seymour (inspecting on a raw day the framework of tho house his friend is erecting—Are you going to line the house with building paper? Ashley (with chattering teeth)—Not if I can afford mustard plasters., Texas Talk It is estimated 730,000 Texans are qualified voters this year. Going some. This is not all. There is going to be something done. Name builders, men who believe in prog ress and peace and plenty and home rule and local self-government in every senatorial and representa tive district. Put it up to the peo ple. Remember Alabama and the Alabama way of doing things. Smash the political ghost-dancers,- time-serving demagogues and the fellows who work with theirxjaws instead of their hands and brain.— Dallas Times-Herald. Texas is full of fire, enthusiasm and courage, and has undertaken some big jobs, but, brother, this is tho biggest ono to. date. Give it to us in salad courses on thin plates for a while until we get used to the game. THE ONE PLACE. The fact that people are flocking to Texas from every state of the Union and from every country on the globe shows pretty well that the aspitations of the human heart are for something better.—Hous ton Post. And when they get here that aspira tion must perish for lack of longing. Here, and here only, is that perfect sat isfaction found elsewhere only in reli gion. A GOOD WEAPON. The penitentiary authorities claim that the number of lashes given in corporal punishment has been reduced from thirty-nine to twenty. It is time they were re forming fn the manner of treating criminals, but the reason the re form hns occurred was not so much that the officials ‘‘had just learn ed” of the cruelty, but because they arc getting afraid of their jobs.—Westhoff Advertiser. Most reforms are strewn with lost jobs as well as lost souls. West Texas towns are at bat in the development dollar league. New banks, new barns, new railroads, new factory stacks, new homeseek ers, single or en suite, new men with gingfr enough to catch step, new commercial enterprises—these and other potential factors in sbove-along progress are includid in the west Texas round-up. Fine. Put Texas at the top.—Fort Worth Star-Telegram. West Texas needn’t get so chesty. We’re doing a few good stunts our selves in that line here in southwest Texas. The state department is to be probed at the instance of a con gressman from Texas, just, as the department of interior is being probed. The department of gov ernment that is not being investi gated at length is certainly not tip to date. —Terrell Transcript. Next thing you know some one will get a corner on probes and then tho whole thing will have to stop. To judge by the reports in the newspapers, Texas people are be coming altogether too careless with fire. We are actually burning up, ever)’ year, more than some boast ful commonwealths produce.—Gal veston News. It’s cheaper in some places to burn it than pay the high insurance rates. OY& IN ON IT, TOO. NEW TRUST. BURNING UP. FEBRUARY 6, 1910. Little Stories WHY IT TOOK SO LONG. The suburban customer shook the bill in the plumber's face. ‘‘l'll never pay it!” he yelled. ‘‘The idea of that litt.e job in my kitchen taking your man 10 hours; it’s an outrage!” ‘‘Now please don’t put all the blame on the man,” the plumber said, con ciliatorily. ‘'He would have got through m one-tenth of the time if you had chosen a more advantageous day.” ‘‘What was wrong with the day I selected?” the customer from "the suburbs fumed. ‘‘Several things,” replied the plumb er quietly. ‘‘ln the first place, it wa« not your cook’s day off. she was pres ent and did all one could to make the man feel at home: secondly, your wife’s society held a musicale in the parlor, and my man, who is passionately fond of music, eould not help hearing the strains of harmony; lastly, there was a football game played in the empty lot next door to your place and my man, who used to play at Yale, naturally glanced at the game from tiine ‘ > time. With all these attractions to fascin ate him can you censure the man for lingering a little?” ( The demeanor of the suburban cus tomer ehanged. ‘‘No, I cannot,” he confessed honestly; “receipt your bill and give this to the man I have been wronging so unjustly,” and he flung down on the plumber's desk a golden eagle. THE PERFUME OF MONEY. “Postal employes are the most lion est-chaps in the world,” said a secret service man. “The only time a postal employe ever falls from grace is at the holiday season, when fooljsh persons send oue another presents of bank notes ’ “A bank note has a sweet and pleas ant odor, easily distinguishable through a scaled envelope. Every man through whoso, hands a letter containing bank notes passes can smell the money. Tim* smell, if he is hard up, is as delicious to his nostrils as the smell of grilling fish to a famished cat. “Rarely, as I said before, does a pos tai employe fall. When he does, it is the fault of tho publie—tho foolish pub lic that too irresistibly tempts him with the sweet odor of the bank notes that it sends through tho mails.” AN ERROR* IN NOSES. “So Bernard Shaw is not coming to America, eh? He says we are 2Q9 years behind the times, so he could learn nothing from us. Welk well!” The speaker, a dramatic critic, laugh ed heartily. “Shaw,” he said, “is amazing. Ho always does the original thing. I went to see ‘Caesar and Cleopatra’ with him once, and ns we stood in tho aisle— the house was crowded—a stranger be hind us persisted in poking his head right over Shaw's shoulder. “Shaw then did tho original thing. Taking out his handkerchief, he wiped the mail's nose, patting and twisting it pretty vigorously. - ■ • “■fiie man with an ugly oath, jerked bark his head. “ ‘Oh, I beg your pardon,’ said Shaw. ‘I thought it was mine, you know.’ ’’ LIKE A JANUARY DAY. Miss Mary Garden, gazing frqm her box at the Metropolitan Opera house onto the stage, said of a beautiful ac tress singing there: “She has a superb figure. Her bodiee, though, is very decollete, and her skirt is very short.” Miss Garden smiled. “In fact,” she said, “her dress re minds me very much of these winter days we're having—it begins too late aniJMt ends too early.” SAFEST. Tall Chappy—l am deueedly super stitious. When I see my tailor coming I cross my fingers so die won't ask me for his bill. Short Chappy—l—generally cross the street. GLOBE SIGHTS. The better a pie ’ tastes, the worse it is for you. It is not a sin to steal things at a grocery store wherg you trade. A man was in town recorttly carry ing a baby. Just bo -1 hind him was his , wife carrying a gup. The average ma n has plenty of excuse . for staying up Uto ' without adding ss ; tronomy to his list, । “They are goal I people,” said one Missourian in speak 1 ing of a neighbor family recently, “but they arc not at all sociable. They, are never seen nt the funerals.” » The Transforms tion (Disguise for “wig”) the hair dressers have invent ed, is the great-st blessing of the age. ' When a woman sees „ the milkman or her ” ' preacher coming, she need not appear with hair nneombed, or in curl papars. She can snatch her Transfor mation from her kit ehen apron pocket, or from the knife drawer in the aide board, and fasten it on with one pin. ami she will look r f sho had just left the hair dresser. With- a Transformation to wear at breakfust. i woman "an hope to Keep Her Hnaband’a Love—Th, Atchism w Glob*. *