SAN ANM LIG.U ANO GAZETTE
Founded January 20. 1881.
Evening Dally. Members Associated Press. Sunday Morning.
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The Light and Gazette is on sale at hotels and news-slands
throughout the United States.
Brother Taft has effect-
D , , .ed a tremendous reform at
KciOrmS luit Washington, and we tillers
Reform I of soil and drawers of wt ter
— back here in the brush who
support Washington ought to sit up and take notice.
It is the custom in Washington to annually have an army
and navy ball. The army and navy people consider these af
fairs extraordinarily recherche, fin de siecle, but in the past
a lot of the society lions have been sneaking in and using
the army and navy dance music, to the mental distress of the
army and navy.
President Taft put an end to this at the regular shindig
last week by using his presidential influence to exclude the
society herd and the capital newspajters are giving him
columns of favorable comment for the incandescent and soul
stirring reform. We give a few excerpts, because the press
associations foolishly failed to carry them:
The glitter of golden epaulets, the splendor of full
dress uniforms, invaded the east room, and the calm
democracy of this great chamber made way for the jqorp
and pageantry of what might have been Ken.tulles in
the full glory of the Napoleonic era. The opalescent chan
deliers, the myriad candelabra. tli,e “’ot of reflected color,
made the scene one of s’miiSt blinding brilliance.
'. •
One can almost- fo i the “calm democracy” of that east
room, where we cotton and corn raisers used to go to shake
the hand of Gr<~.er, making way for a Napoleonic era headed
by Bill Taft
Says John McLean's paper:
It is not in vain that the army and navy reception has
gained the reputation of being the most coruseant of the
mid-winter events of the white house. It was abundant
ly sustained in this pre eminence last night with a dis
tinction and grace which never has been surpassed in
the annals of the executive mansion. There was a homo
geneity in the assemblage —a thorough predominance of
army and navy men—which distinguished the event
from those which have preceded it. Comparatively few
civilians were in attendance. The reception was true to
its name, and the military guests were enthusiastic in
praise of the president for having effected this reform.
We’re for any reform that's “most coruscant,” every
time. There's little use in baiting-robber trusts, trying to
break the corporation bronchos, and squealing about the
aviation of prices, while there’s a single uneoruseanted func
tion at Washington that hasn't been cinched up to the very
last hole in the social bellyband. And Reformer Taft went
farther than exclusion of unwashed democracy. You’d think
he’d stop at such a tremendous reformation, wouldn't you!
But he didn’t. Listen:
“Chaste indeed was the adornment of the mansion."’ '
And having accomplished the task of chastening that man- 1
Bion:
In the state dining room another characteristic Taft
innovation was carried out. This was the serving of
refreshments, including an excellent punch, in accord
ance with the plan of the previous events of the sea
son.
Two reforms, forsooth! Not only punch, but “excellent”
punch and seasonable. There's no knowing what is meant
by “previous events of the season” in regulating your trips
to the bowl of excellent punch, but events have been ptettj
considerably numerous in Washington, and putting your
dipper into excellent punch under a schedule of just plain
Washington events must prove to be ten miles more re
formatory, socially, than the old plan of trying to get
coruscant on unferinented grape juice.
Somehow or other the demagoguery of Jeff Davis, United
States senator from Arkansas, does not appeal to the senate
as it does to the natives of his own state. Some twenty
miles out of Poplar Bluff the “rousing” anti-trust speech
of yesterday, when he expressed a willingness t 0 let the
Standard Oil pipe line run through Hades rather than
through Arkansas, would have evoked wild eheers. And
still there are some who wonder why Arkansas is a back
number.
♦
Mayor Callaghan's ideas regarding the character of the
coliseum, or stadium, that San Antonio ought to build, seem
to be extremely sensible. The structure ought to be adapt
able to the needs of al) the people and not a building which
is capable of service but once or twice a year. The ma
jority of the people will uphold the mayor in his determi
nation 'o make the new structure fill many needs, and all
of them well.
; ♦—
It is announced with some show of pride that the pack
ers have at last received a hard jolt under the fifth rib.
The railroads have increased the rates o u beef products.
My, how the trust must squirm. The consumer wil] now
get his pot roast much cheaper, will he not? Yes. he will not
The lightning has hit Ballinger and he is going to show
the public that wTmn he gets to withdrawing land he is
‘.lie best land withdruwer that the nation ever had. In fact,
he is going to withdraw so fast and so hard that even the
»»abid conservationist will call “enough.”
FRIDAY,
I When the locomotive was
. c cf . , . invented the world remained
The Agi ot Might
I calm. There was no craze for
It’s Here at Last I the new machine. One by
l_ - one, as the years went, by,
railways adopted the steam horse, and finally the traffic of
; the nations was hauled by steam. But the boom in locomo
tives was a slow and sane one.
So with the bicycle. The motor ear was slower still. But
the flying machine bids fair to burst on the world like a
storm. True, some years have passed since the rumors began
to be buzzed about that those two silent W right brothers had
been seen flying round and round their practice grounds.
Some years have passed since Langley perfected his “Theory’
of aerodvnamies,” and was robbed ot his laurel wreath as
the conqueror of the air by a niggardly congress and the in
ability of the public men of this country to stand ridicule..
Langley's heart has been some years broken, l|ut yet, the
swiftness of the development of the flying art lakes one s.
। breath away like the swoop of mighty wings.
The Wrights. Curtiss, Farman. I’aulhan, Bieriot—the mem
ory fails now to recall the full list of those who actually fly
i —fly like eagles or condors.
It is perfectly’ marvelous to be able to make that state
; ment. No man five years ago would have believed it possi
ble. That we can make it calmly shows us to be jaded with;
, marvels. We have lost the power of amazement.
An association has been formed in Chicago called the Aero!
club, with 113 members. They do not mean to study aero
dynamics, but to practice a new art. the art for which thei
‘ mind of man has longed since the first human being marked
the darting of the bird, the art of flight.
They will buy their flying machines in. the open market.
. They will hire flying masters and learn the trick. And Chi-,
i cago is not the pioneer—she is behind the other great cities
iof the world. The air will soon be full of flying men and
1 women. The human mind must adjust itself to a new condi
tion. Laws, institutions, modes of life, literature, art, music,
the drama, all our multifarious activities called life must ad
just themselves to the wonderful new fact that man lias be
come a flying animal-
And soon in San Antonio will be gathered some of the
foremost “men of the air” so that we may see for ourselves
the enormous strides made by the conquerors of gravitation.
That aviation meet will mark a great event in San Antonio’s
history.
4
Secretary Nagle seems to place importance upon the
necessity for. and have a high opinion of. the proposed fed
eral incorporation law. His chief is not inclined to say
much JJiiiwpfospeetivc piece of legislation, leaving i
i‘ Jae-a less mighty voice to sound its praises. And yet;
some say that the president is not altogether diplomatic. !
He must have been sitting at the knee of Mr. Knox, that
arch-diplomat.
*
The free clinic which rs planned for San Antonio and
which has been given such an auspicious beginning, is one
of the noblest of charities. It is an institution that this ;
city has lung needed and it is to be hoped that the efforts
of the people interesting themselves in the project will j
meet with the support that is so well deserved. A free j
clinic vil] do an untold amount of good and play the Good
Samaritan role to hundreds of poor. 'Lot everyone help |
when the time comes.
—♦
The arrival of another oil well seems to once more point ।
to the fact that there is a big oil field somewhere near San
Antonio, and that it will arrive in due time after, pos- |
sibly. many disappointments.
As Others View It
In the senate a day or two ago Senator Elkins gave this
illuminating bit of testimony as to how the Aldrich tariff
law was made. The finance committee and its methods
were under discussion when Mr. Elkins said:
“I never have got anything out of that committee except
during the consideration of the tariff, when 1 got a few of
the droppings by begging for them Mid by voting for every
thing else that was suggested.”
In other words. West Virginia got what it wanted by
giving Mainland Rhode Island, and other states what they
wanted.
The republican platform, it will be recalled, promised
revision I ased on the difference in the cost of production at
home and abroad. As Senator Elkins shows, that wasn’t
quite what the country got.—Kansas City Star.
« :—
SENATOR HEYBURN STANDS ALONE.
»
Had -i speech like that of Senator Heyburn's been made
in the senate twenty years ago there would have been an
outburst of indignation through the south, and in the north
there would have been sympathy with the speaker on the
part of many, sorrow at the reopening of old wounds on til?
part of more.
The north and south understand ea<di other better now.
The outbreaks of demagogues no longer cause pain, onh
ridicule. That the loyalty of the south to its “lost cause”
involves no loss of loyalty to the union has lm-n abundantly
proved. No objection now to the return of confederate
battle tings. No objection to the gray uniform on the
streets < f Washington.
Waving the bloody shirt has gone out of fashion. Hev
burn is an anachronism. —Syracuse Post-Standard
+
WILL COME OUT RIGHT IN THE END.
In all this agitation over high prices, f ] scarcitv.
stock market scares, trust and corporation abuses, graft
iirselosnres and pernicious iiiflucncis in polith* ;t (g a
, good tiling for the people to occasionally r-fle.-t that these
troibles wi'l have their day and pas- awar that “it. will
I nil com’ out right in the end.” There is not a chance in a
thousand ot any other outcome, although it might with
truth be added that w hen the present pr >l.lctus are solved
and disposed of, it is als o probable th>i. win be a fresh
crop of puzzling questions and issues to < i:_ ige the atten
tion of the people of this nation, who will again, no doubt,
work out solutions und apply remedies u ith tin- same good
sense and judgment that have always been charaeteristie
of American citizenship. —Oshkosh Northwestern
Pointed Paragraphs
"1 he biggest bore is the man whom everything <bores.
We can have ideals in abundance till we get a chance to
। carry them out.
1 All jou hare to do to make foolish words seem sensible is
, to put them in a song.
The only kind act one type of men ever does to his wife
' is to let her become his widow.
A wife craves romance; a husband comfort
The devil keeps his telephone open all the time tor village
। gossip.
What a man hates is not being wrong in a „ argument, but
having to admit it.
The Lord gave few women intellect so that man could have
a slight chance against them.
I A woman's look of agony at a wedding is almost as eon
[ vincing as her expression of joy at a lecture ou foreign mis
i sious.—New York Press.
SAN ANTONIO LIGHT AND GAZETTE
BARTER.
ALL SORTS
Copyright, 1909. bv
Post Publishing Co
By NEWTON NEWKIRK.
Josh Wise Says:
“It's when his wife
goes away on a visit
that man learns self
help.”
WHAT LUCK!
1 have been a good deal wrought up I
over the receipt of the following letter
from London:
Mr. Newton Newkirk, U. 8. A.
Dear Sir: We have the honor to
inform you- that a well known mem
ber of English royalty recently
passed away, anti has made you the
sole beneficiary under his will, and
has appointed our firm as execu
tors. It appears that, this titled
personage is related to you, and
that you are the only kith or kin
he had in the world. His estate is i
valued at about 5000 pounds sterl
ing, all of which, by the terms of
his will, you are entitled to. Now
before we proceed to settle up the
estate, it will be necessary for
you to identify yourself as Newton
Newkirk, and forward us an affi
davit to that effect. As an evi
dence of good faith we must also I
ask you to send us the sum of 500
pounds sterling, or its equivalent
in United States currency. We
might add that there is also a title
accompanies this inheritance, that
• of a dukedom, accompanied by an
English estate of over 1000 acres
of valuable land, on which there
stands an old English castle. Please
let us hear from you at your earliest
convenience, so that we may carry
out the provisions of the' testa
tor's will. Very truly vonrs.
BUNCOME & BUNCOME,
Solicitors.
Messrs. Buncome & Buncome, Solicit
ors, London, Eng.
Respected Gents: The glad tidings
to the effect that I have inherited a
fortune of 5000 pounds sterling, a duke
dom aud a vast English estate with an
ancient castle almost overwhelms me
with surprise. I can hardly believe it
I is true, und ever and anon I find my
; self burning up matches to keep niy
। pipe going. This vast wealth, this un
earned increment, coming to me at the
| present moment is most, welcome, iu
■ deed, I have been monkeying with the
i market of late, and my present patri
mony looks somewhat like 30 cents in
small change. A fortune of 5000 pounds
sterling at this time will enable me to
.salt the State Street Bull, and put an
other crimp in the Bear's tail. Five
thousand pounds! Gee whiz — why,
that's almost $25,000. I can now buy
a meal ticket and will have enough
left over to purchase an automobile,
which will give me an air of gasoline
wherever I go.
As for the 1000 acre estate, I think
I will sell all of that for house lots,
except say a few acres surrounding the
castle. 1 presume this castle is in a
somewhat dilapidated .condition, aud it
is my wish that you put it into good
repair at once, because I shall probably
spend a few weks there during the com
ing summer. Leave a little “Rough on
Rats” around the castle where it will
do the most good. Install a new bath
room with open plumbing, pipe the cas-j
tie with hot and eold speaking tubes |
put in a large wine cellar, and install
running water, but don’t leave the
hydrant turned on. lias the castle a
southern exposure? If not. build one
on—l am very fussy about having a
southern exposure on my castle, and
hang the expense! Another thing—
does this castle have a mont ? If it I
doesn’t it should have, and I author-)
ize .you to go ahead and build a moat
at once. If my castle doesn't have a;
large, airy, comfortable moat by the
time J arrive, international complica-)
tions between England and the United
States may result.
I wish you would also forward me.
my duke license so that I can look it!
over and file it away in my safety de 1
posit vault. I will have to rely on you
for information concerning this new
title which I have acquired. lu other
words, does a duke wear a crown or a
stovepipe hat. or merely an English
Derby? Do I have to be put through
the third degree in order to become a
duke, or does King Edward simply slap
me on the back and say, “You’re it!”
I 'll bet us English dukes will have a
rostering time when we get together of
an evening at the Sign of the Ilogs
head. I suppose since I have been
made a duke I ought to have a dukess
at. the castle to sort of keep it tidied,
up and add an air of royalty to the
place. Please pick me out a beautiful
English dukess and tell her to possess
herself in patience until I arrive. She
must be a blonde with pink cheeks aud
blue eyes, of about HO pounds net
weight, good figure, regal carriage (I
will furnish the horses) and she must
have a sweet and amiable disposition—
no other dukesses need apply for this
job.
We now come to that little matter ot
500 pounds sterling which you require
as an evidence of good faith. Lot me
see? Five hundred ]iounds roughly is
$2500. I have had a heart to heart
talk with my assets since your letter
arrived, aud I find that by disposing
of al) my personal property (except one
suit of clothes and a half used meal
ticket) I can raise $7.50. Now would
you regard this as very much evidence 1
of good faith. I mignt increase this'
amount to $lO by negotiating a loan,
but I could not promise sure as to that.
Please let me hear bow you feel about
this at your earliest convenience.
P. B.—Meanwhile kindly keep my
title of duke on ice. and if you see any
body walking on the grass of my estate,
shoo 'em off.
“Is he a man to be trusted?” ”Ab
solutely. You may even bare a cigar
exposed in your rest pocket and he
won't reach over aud grab it.”- Ue
troll lieu Press
• •
Ne ve »• Again!
Observant Citizen
Titis bit of brightness is said to have
cropped out in a conversation-between
two ipisses not old enough to go to
school
‘.‘What njakes a horse act naughty
when he sees an auto?”
*■ It is this way: Horses -is used to
Seoin other horses pull wagons, am!
they don t know what to think of 'em
goin’ aiding without a horse. Guess if
yon saw a pair of pants walkin’ down
liie xtieet without a man in 'em von'd
be scared, too.' ’
> . •
“Next to the man who is never
without an umbrella is the man who
throws an overcoat over his shoulders
without running his arms through the
sleeveholes.” remarked Observant
Citizen. “Yes. there arc lots of them.
They can be seen walking along these
spring days with an overcoat thrown
over their shoulders as if it was a
blanket. Now. if I had an overcoat,
which . nave, and didn’t want to wear
if, which I don't, I would leave it nt
home, which I do. It strikes me that
a man who turows an overcoat over his
shoulders without running his arm*
through the sleoveholes is too lazy to
put it on properly. It certainly does
look slouchy.”
SAN ANTONIO 21 YEARS AGO
(From The Light. Feb. 18. 1889).
A strong flow of natural gas was
struck at the artesian well of -e
Crystal ice factory on Avenue B today
ami the flame burns brightly.
John Johnson, a tall negro, is ar
raigned in the police court on a charge
of vagrancy. The case is continued.
Parties desiring to go to the Paris
exposition will find it to their advan
tage to join the excursion of the Texas
Industrial aud Agricultural association,
flie directors of this association are
Tims. 11. Abbott, president: Henry
Hyder Taylor, secretary; J. J. Olsen Jr.,
t reasurer.
Dr. J. M. Rues of Cuero is in the
i- i t y.
Leon Michael is in the city from
Victoria.
Frank E. Galpin. Joseph W. Holmes,
John O'Meara and J. W. Carr were
sworn in last night as members of the
Maverick Rifles.
Mrs. Colonel Belknap has returned
from a visit to Mexico.
A. Allee of Pearsall is in the city
and is stopping at the St. Leonard.
Henry Deutz, a merchant of Laredo,
is in the city.
F. G. Morris, a lawyer of Austin, is
in the city.
At n sjiecial meeting hold after the
game yesterday afternoon, officers for
the Little Jokers baseball team were
elected as follows: Manager. F. G.
Huntress: captain. Addison Hayes; sec
rotary and treasurer. F. W. Mosebacb.
The Jokers defeated the Browns at
Muth's garden by a sevre of 5 to 1.
Texas Talk
THE TEXAS SPIRIT.
The interest being taken by the.
children of Texas in the Hogg
memorial monument movement is
gratifying aud very encouraging.
The amount received during the
past week will average about $75
per day. and the management has
only begun to send out their ad
vertising literature. But the novel
ty of the idea of a monumen* built
by the children of the state is
taking hold and seems to apppeal
strongly to every one. One old
Swede said: “I am nnt a Texan,
but my children are. and they are
building the monumo ” —Austin
Statesman.
It's good to know of this illustration
of the n-ady adoption of the state as
“home” by the new settl«ri<- It's
a sign of the new that is so rap
idly coming to the for-.
WHAT IS IT?
What is to prevent-the govern
ments of the United States and
Mexico going to work at'compnri
tivejy a moderate cost, r.nd secur
ing a nine foot depth in the Rio
Grande from Laredo all tlie way
down to.tlie gulf of Mexico.? The:.!
is no calculating the amount of
transportation that awaits the
securing of tjiis depth.—Laredo
Times.
We don't know what is to prevent
it. but we'll give our word to the
Oniontown editor that we haven't used
our influence to hold it up. Let them
get together and do it. We don't care.
STEPS.
Steps are being taken, the |>ublic
is informed by the press dis
patches, to rid the various county
jails over the state of their insane
by making room for them in the
asylums of Texas. It is gratifying
at any rate to know that steps arc
being taken; possibly the desired
end will be reached after while.—
Terrell Transcript.
If the “steps” are long enough the
“desired end” will be reached soriie
time, perhaps. The steps ought to be
made with seven league boots and
taken fast.
ALL BUT PACE.
Houston has contracted for a
big auditorium and Sau Antonio
has about completed plans for a
combination stadium-anditorium.
Texas is growing and the demand
for honsing great gatherings is be
ing met with diligent speed. Let
Texas top the list in all things flat
make for progress, nrosperity and
peace.—Fort Worth Star-Telegram.
In progress and prosperity Texas has
long ago topped the list, but with a
guliernatorial race on the peace thing
has small chance for a look-in.
FEBRUARY 18. 1010.
Little Stories
i Senator Depew tells a story lon nim
| self which has had a good deal of vogue/
) in the senate lobby this week.
] “When I was a very young man,”
1 he said, “ I went out. to make a political
speech with some older men one night.
They wanted something red hot, and
I handed it out.
“But after 1 got home I wor
ried. 1 had roasted the other side aw
fully. I lay awake wondering if it
| wouhln't react and injure our side
more than the opposition. .
“Then I bethought of some personal
! allusions 1 had made. I got a good
deal excited and slept very little. In
I the morning I hurried down to see
whether the papers had roasted me. •
“The meeting was reported all over
1 , the front page. I plunged into: it,
i shivering iq nervousness. But I needn't
~ have worried. What it said about my
. speech was in the last two lines:
“ ‘A young man named Depew also
s|K>ke.’ ” .
• 4
j -I. I'ierpont Morgan was educated at
, the famous University of Gottingen.
Discussing the German universities, Mr.
; Morgan said:
j “A great many young American stu
dents finish up in Germany. They have
i quite a reputation there. A great Ger.a
man biologist once said to me: ’
“ ‘1 think we shall have to exclude
, your young compatriots from our
; schools. They no sooner come here than
| they begin to cheat, t
‘‘('heat?' said I, alarmed. ‘How
, so?'
>; “ ‘Why. said the biologist, ‘they
li only pay tuition for one. but they learn
enough for three or four/ ”
The old darky had driven his fare
to the hotel and was now demanding a
dollar for his service.
‘‘What? protested the passenger,
“n dollar for that distance? Whv, it
| isn't half a mile as the crow flics!”
“Dat's true, boss,” rethrned Nam
। bo. with an appealing smile, “but ye
I see. suh. dat old crow he ain't got )
free wives an’ ten ehilluns to stippoht,'
i not to mention de keep foh de boss.”
Ldna May or Mrs Oscar Lewisnlin
tells a quaint little story.
“J was n patroness,” she said, ‘‘of
some amateur theatricals given by chiL //
i. dreu at a party in Belgrave squat*
। During the first act, as I wandered
about behind the scenes, I came upon a
little girl seated all alone in a dark
corner. « -
“ ‘Why are you left out, my dearf’
I asked. ‘Aren’t you playing, too? ’
. < ‘‘ Ob ' rse left out,’ said the
child. • I 'se the babv waiting to be
bomed.’ ”
A traveler for a firm of wine mer
chants gives n terrible account of the
intense cold in Sweden:
“In Hapnrnnda. the day before 1
left. 1 attended a )terformairee at the
theater It was a tragedy. Everybody
wept; but it was so terribly cold tn«t
the tears of the spectators in the upper
ga ‘-ru-s tell like hailstones among th*
j occupants of the pit.”