My name is John Smith—plain
Smith, without change or addition
of vowel—and I was in no way dis
contented with it till I fell in love
with Katie Rogers. Katie had never
sneered at it, but her elder sister,
Miranda, had more than once hinted
1 hat it was neither romantic nor un
common; and her father, in hl« some
vhat lengthy discourse« about the
Dritish aristocracy, had an aggra
voting way of looking apologetic«Uy
sit, me every time he spoke or'a good
In our commercial community
î-'mith wa» tounted a better name
I hau Rogers, and young Smith, the
j iaing cotton-broker, a more distin
guished member of society than old
P.ogers, ex-captain of dragoons, who
could scarcely pay his thirty-pound
rent, and never wore a decent hat.
I quite agreed with my neighbors
on these points till I fell in love with
Katie, and grew familiar with Mir
anda's sentiments about "the ignor
ance of Philistine Riverbank."
Captain Rogers was descended from
T'itzroger who came over with Con
queror, and, as I listened reverently
< o the history of the family progress
1 brough eight centuries, there was a
total collapse of my once foolish
pride in In-longing to what a local pa
per called "one of the oldest families
in Riverbank." For Riverbank was
scarcely aa old as my father, having
grown into a town with a speed rare
l.y equalled on this side of the Atlan
In a general way Î did not under
value myself, but it was with a deep
«■nue of humility that I implored the
descendant of Fitzroger to become
ïuther-in-law. We were alone to
gether in the dining-room of the
thirty-pound house, he sitting in a
shabby armchair. I standing on a still
shabbier hearthrug. He looked up
ab the "Battle Roll of Hastings,"
which hunir over the mantlepiece,
and down at the fire kept by
economical Miranda. Then, hav
ing apparently weighed the pdst
glories of Fitzroger against the pres
ent price of coals, ho excepted my
proposal with the magnificent conde
scension of a kiïig consenting, for cer
tain State Reasons, to bestow the
hand of a royal princess on an aspir
Ho Katie.and I were engaged, and,
for a time, I was supremely happy. I
was not quite vain enough to share
my darling's opinion that I, John
Smith, waH better worth worshiping
than all Carlyle's "Heroes" put to
gether; but I was rather easily con
vinced that I was far too fine a fellow
to fear any rival. So, when Katie
ivent on a visit to London, there was
no bitterness in my regret, for I be
lieved in her—and myself.
At first I was not disturbed by
Miranda's boasts about the advant
ages lier sister was enjoying in "the
best society," but when the Lon
don visit extended for weeks
am} months beyond its orig
inal limit, I began to feel
vaguely uneasy. In those days
^Katie's letters, though loving, were
long, and she more than once
apologized for their brevity of plead
ing "a particular engixgement, " the
nature of which she never explained.
My confidence sank, my jealousy rose.
At last she came home, and then I
noticed a change in her that seriously
alarmed me. She was pale and
quieter, and at times there was a
r. istful look in her eyes, suggestive o
something on her mind. It could not
be anxiety about her father'6 pe
cuniary affairs, because about that
time he appeared in a new hat, and
Miranda kept better fires. These out
ward and visible signs of prosperity
would have given me sincere pleasure
if it had not been for the suspicion
that old Rogers was more than ever
disposed to take the Norman Con
quest tqne with me, and for the cer
tainty that Miranda's sneers at "peo
ple wno could not count their grand
fathers" were all for my benefit.
What did that Bort of thing mean?
Mad Katie been tempted a way from
nie bv a lover with a long pedigree?
Would Rogers tell ine some day, like
t he father of old-fashioned romance,
that he had "other views" for his
One evening I called much later
than usual, having been detained by
un important business matter in the
neighboring city of Shipley. The out
er door of the house was open, and I,
in my usual way, turned the handle
of the vestibule door and walled into
the drawing-room, which appeared to
be empty. I was just going to ring
the bell for the servant, when I heard
a pleading little voice behind me:
"Oh, I say, Jack, don't do that!"
It was the voice of Bob, the young
est of Katie's many young brothers,
und, turning sharply round, I saw
his scared little face peeping between
the curtains drawn across the bow
"Come here, dear old Jack," he en
treated: "and stay with me till she
"What she?" I asked, as I stepped
behind the curtains to find Bob's
hitherto invisible form clad in a
"Miranda," he added in a tragic
Bou had blue eyes and golden hair,
and in his white array he looked like
an angel in a picture. But I rightly
guessed that he had descended from
the upper regions that night on no
"I thought she was safe up in the
lumber room for the next half hour,"
he explained, "and I got out of bed
and was slipping down to the kitch
en for a taste of the new jam. I knew
it was my only chance. She's so
beastly mean about it when it's in
pots. I just got to the hall when I
heard her sneaking down stairs, so I
ran in here. She's in the dining room
now, and I don't know whether she's
going up again or down to the kitch
"Don't be a coward, my boy,"
I said, feeling it my duty
to be moral. "Of course,
Miranda will scold you if she finds
you, but you must bear it like a
"Scold!" repeated Bob, with scorn
in his subdued tones. "Do you think
I'd care if it was only that?"
I understood the full peril of the
situation now. Miranda prided her
self on doing a mother's duty to the
Motherless boys, and I knew that
whatever her hand found to do she
did it with all her might.
"And it's just because I ain't a
toward I don't want to meet her,"
went on Bob, evidently mindfal ofthf
traditions of Fitarogjer valof> ''TôO
see, Jack, I could hitback if she was
a man, but she ain't you know, And
of course no fellow who Ls à gentle
man ever hits a woman."
"Robert«" I murmered, "you are
the «oui of chivalry."
"Oh. shut up, Jack Smith!" ftnd
my small brother-ill lüw-elect held
me with a tîeéperate grip. "She's corn
I peered cautiously between the
heavy curtains, and catlghta glimpse
of Miranda'« lank form and lynx
eye« The next moment she was
Vanishing, but she stopped as Katie
appeared at the door.
"Kate," she said in her thin, sharp
voice, "I was looking for you. I think
you might help me to pot the jata.
Smith may not be here to-night-, and
if he comes let him wait. How pale
you look! I can tell you, my dear,
that your appearance has hbt im
Sroved since you took Up with Fitz
1 etood with freezing blood behind
the curtains, wondering fthat awful
revelation wan About to wreck my
life'« happiness. In a lightning flash
of jealous imagination I sawFitzher
bert. No doubt he was one of the
swells Katie had met in London. A
military swell, oneofthosehandsome»
haughty guardsmen 1 had read about
in society novels.
"Miranda," said Katie, "doh'tvou
think I ought to tell Jack about Fitz
"No, I don't," said Miranda sharp
ly. "I don't see why the interests of
our family are to be risked in a col
lision with the narrow middle-class
prejudices of Mr. John Smith."
Katie's voice sounded a little weary
when she spoke ajraia.
"You know, Miranda, you were
horrified yourself when I first told
you about Fitzherbert's proposal."
Miranda replied in a tone of cold
"I was more open to conviction
than you would find Mr. John Smith.
We Wüo have been rooted in English
soil for eight centuries naturally take
larger views of life than mushrooms
of yesterday. Besides, your conduct
in this affair is justified by the ex
ample and approval of women in the
What a world of whited sepulchers!
I had never loved Miranda, but I had
always respected her. However skep
tical I might have been about her
f>ersonal charmB ,Ihad never doubted
1er principles. Miranda taught a
class in the Sunday-school, worked
a district on strict Charity Organiza
tion principles, and was decorated
with the Order of the Blue Ribbon.
Yet here was this seemingly virtuous
Miranda applauding her younger sis
ter's falseness to a true lover because
it was the fashion of Women in the
best society to trampie on honest
"I hate concealment," said Katie;
"and Jack is so truthful himseif,that
I can't bear the idea of deceiving him.
Oh, Miranda, dear, I was so happy
when Fitzherbert made me the offer
that I never stopped to wonder what
Jack would think about it, but now I
am so miserable that I sometimes
think I must give up Fitzherbert."
"Rubbish!" said Miranda, "and
selfish rubbish too. I wonder, Kate
Rogers, how you can talk in that
way, when you know how useful Fitz
herbert's money is to your poor
Oh, this was too awful? Katie not
only false to me, but actually so
mean as to take money from her new
lover. I could stand it no longer. I
wrenched myself from poor little
Bob's grasp, and stood sternly facing
the two girls.
Miranda fled from the room.
Katie stood white and still.
"Pray do not give up Fitzherbert
on my humble account," I said scorn
fiilly. "Do not let my vulgar preju
dice in favor of truth and honesty in
terfere with the wider morality of the
best society. Marry Fitzherbert to
morrow, if you like, and be as happy
as you deserve to be."
The color rushed back into Katie's
face. The light sparkled in her eyes.
She actually laughed.
"Thank you very much, Jack,"
she said, "but even with your kind
Ç emission I can't marry Fitzherbert.
he fact is," and her blue eyes
danced, "Fitzherbert is married."
"And you dare to tell me," I cried
in wild rage, "that you have not
only accepted love but money from a
She looked straight into my face
with her laughing eyes.
"Fitzherbert is not a married
man," she said.
"I was never good at guessing
riddles," I said loftily; "and as I am
not in the mood for them to-night, I
give this one up. If Fitzherbert is
married, and if Fitzherbert is not a
married man, what in Heaven's
name, is Fitzherbert?"
Clear came the answer in the
sweet, gay, girlish voice:
"Fitzherbert is a married woman."
Then, with crushing consciousness
of having made a fool of myself, I
listened humbly to Katie's little
"Iitzherbertis a West End milliner,
and was Aunt Clara's maid before
her marriage. Her name is not
really Fitzherbert, but something
quite ordinary, like Brown or Smith—
oh, I beg your pardon, Jack,! She
was always fond of me, and I often
amused myself looking through her
fashions. One day, while I was wait
ing for Aunt Clara, who had gone to
her dentist, a fussy old lady came in
to the shop, and was very angry be
cause none of the new Paris bonnets
suited her. She was one of the best
customers, and poor Fitzherbert was
in despair when she was leaving the
shop in a rage. Well, Jack, I have
quite a genius for millinery. One of
our ancestors was a painter, and
Aunt Clara says I have his artistic
eye for color and form. Anyhow, I
always seem to know exactly what
suits a face. I persuaded the old
lady to sit down again and, with
Fitzherbert's permission, I made a
few alterations in one particular bon
net. The result was so becoming
that the old lady was charmed.
'You are a heaven-born milliner, my
dear,' she said. 'Why don't you go
in for that sort of thing? It is all trie
fashion among the best people.'
Aunt Clara called for me pres
ently, and was quite struck with the
new idea. After a long talk with Fitz
herbert, it was decided that I should
go to the shop every day, and quali
fy for the position of millinery aide
de-camp. I became quite popular
with the customers, especially the el
derly ones. I love oldladies, and de
light it making them lovely, and some
of them threatened to leave Fitzher
bert unless I undertook the arrange
ment of their bonnets and caps for
the term of my single life. Fitzher
bert offered me very liberal pay for
my assistance, and I was so glad to
think of helping poor old daddy th it
at first I forgot about you and your
possible objection to marrying a
woman who Wttrkfed for A
shopfbut I thought of this after
wards, and was always fighting with
mv conscience about telling you the
truth. But, indeed, there are faaany
lady-milliners in London, and On,
Jack dear, I see you don't mind Bö
ery much, after all!"
The precise nature of my conduct
on this occasion need not here be re
The bridal wreath was a present
from Fitzherbert.—From "House
hold Words," London, edited by
A Thnrlow Weed Story.
It will be remembered that early In
the War Mr. Weed was dispatched to
Europe on ft special diplomatic mis
sion connected with the capture of
Slidell and Mason, the fitting out in
foreign water of rebel cruisers, the
blockade of Southern ports, &c.
His first objective point was the
French court, and he landed at
Havre. He remained in Paris some
time in consultation with our minis
ter and others. Then he crossed the
channel, and while in London was the
special guest of the great American
banking firm of Peabody, Morgan &
One morning, while sitting in the
private office of the firm, Mr. Morgan
showed him a copy of what purport
ed to be a circular letter, which was
obtained by Mr. Morgan at the for
This letter which had beensurrepti
ously sent from Paris, foreshadowed
the position which Louis Nepoleon
was to assume in his message to the
chamber upon American affairs. Mr.
Weed quietly pocketed the copy,
packed nis bag, and immediately left
He was Well acquainted with one of
the prominent bankers in Paris,
whom he had known while the latter
was a merchant in New York. The
banker was a favorite at court, and
on his arrival Mr. Weed proceeded to
the banker's chamber. He showed
him the copy, which included this
passage in the forthcoming message:
"The filling up of the harbor of
Charleston, S. C., is an unparalleled
instance of civilized barbarity, and
it is time the European powers
should intefere," &c., &c.
The banker read it carefully, then
paused. All at once he exclaimed:
"I have it! You know that the em
peror prides himself upon following
directly in the steps of his illustrious
uncle. Now in the great Napolean's
reign precisely the same thing oc
curred by order of the emperor. '
"But have you proof of this?"
asked Weed. "Here it is," replied
the banker, as he took down a book
and opening to the page where the
Napoleon to fill
order was given by
up the harbor of Cherbourg
to prevent the approach of
"Now," continued the banker, "I
will arrange for a meeting between
you and the emperor to-morrow at
10 o'clock. You take this book with
you and keep your finger on the page,
but look out for Morny."
"Will you not accompany me?"
"No, that would destroy the ef
The next morning Mr. Weed pre
sented himself before the emperor,
who was surrounded with officials,
whom he dismissed, saying: "I have
special business with a foreign minis
ter." All retired but Morny.
Louis Napoleon could talk English
as well as French, and Weed at once
plundged into the matter by showing
the emperor the copy he had brought
from London. Turning to Morny,
the emperor said: "We have been
betrayed." It proved so, as an under
secretary had been paid the sum of
10,000, to furnish a copy to the
Napoleon then proceeded to justify
his proposed measure by saying
that sinking stone barges in the har
bor of Charleston, thus shutting out
the port from the commerce of the
world, was unprecedented in the his
tory of civilization."
"îtfo, sire," remarked Mr. Weed.
"Your illustrious uncle did the same
"When and where?" demanded
Weed then opened the book and
pointed out the paragraph.
The emperor was silenced. Weed
saw his advantaged and pursued it.
"Sire," he said, "there are four
cruisers fitting out in French waters
to carry the rebel flag."
Napoleon paused for a few mo
ments; then, turning to Mr. Weed, he
remarked: "Not one of them shall
have a French port."
Mr. Weed retired from the presence
of his majesty, well satisfied with the
result of his visit, and returned im
mediately to London. The obnox
ious clause in the emperor's speech
was stricken out and tne would-be
rebel cruisers never left a French port.
A Cargo of Monkey».
A French paper relates a good sto
ry about a merchant in Marseilles
who wrote to a correspondent on the
cost of Africa asking him to send him
at his convenience two or three mon
keys of the rarest and most valua ble
species. As chance would have it the
merchant, in stating the number,
wrote ou (or) between the figures two
and three with a very small o and a
diminutive u. How great events may
issue from small causes will appear
from the sequel. A few months pass
ed over, when at last a messenger was
sent from the harbor to inform the
merchant that his menagerie had ar
rived. My "menagerie! was the as
tonished reply. "Yes, a menagerie;
in fact, a whole cargo of monkeys
have come for you." The merchant
could not believe the man until a let
ter was delivered to him from his
friend in Africa, a person of the most
scrupulous exactness, in which he
gravely apologized for his having
been unable, notwithstanding all his
efforts, to procure more than 160
monkeys instead of 203 as ordered,
but promised to forward the remain
der as soon as possible. Imagine the
feelings of the merchant on going
down to the port to convince himself
with his own eyes of the existence of
his 160 monkeys, which were all com
fortably housed and which grinned
at liim through the bars of their
Wakes Down South.
There is a very curious custom
prevalent among the negroes of
Georgia as to their dead. The de
ceased is generally put into a cheap
plank coffin and laid away in the
grave with no ceremony whatever. A
year afterward a preacher's services
are procured and the funeral sermon
is preached amid weeping and wailing
and other manifestations of grief.
feat 111 Rie» A BCtkHtlST <
Ok, ehe said she'd never marry any Tom,
Dick and Harry;
She 'd wed some famous scientist of learn
ing and renown.
But her Tom was quite commercial, and of
Agassiz and Herschel
He was ignorant, she said, as any circus
Bo she gave poor Tom the mitten, and, as
meek as any kitten,
He went to making money and forgot his
Forgot, I say; at any rate, he hastened to
Into a sordid business man, a trifling mil
But she wed a scientific, and his tastes ware
For vorioüs kinds of insects and for toads
and other game;
And instead of plaques and pictures, rattle
snakes and boa constrictors
He'd take into his sitting room to orna
ment the same.
At ft zealous decorator he preferred the alli
To a statue of Minerva or a bust of Henry
And you ought to hear him to talk awhile of
his bouncing baby crocodile
That he played with in his parlor just to
while the time away.
And his cobra di capello, a very charming
Through his dressing-room and bedroom
used to nonchalantly drift;
And an elephant's proboscis and two young
He presented to his children as a fitting
But he sold his wife's piano to buy ipecacu
To feed his hippoptamus to ease his stom
And a shark ate up the baby, for you know
how hungry they be,
And he went and pawned his overcoat to
feed his rattlesnakes.
The Stock Company.
A weak voice, piping from the inte
rior of a slow-moving covered wagon,
described exactly the appearance of
the landscape of the portion of New
Mexican barrenness through which
the vehicle was crawling.' 'Some way
ever'thing looks plumb discouraged,
Jeff," it said.
"It looks that a-way, shore," an
swered the small, light-haired, bare
footed boy who trudged along beside
the wagon and drove the skinny
Discouraged! It seemed to describe
everything in sight. The mules
crawled along in a half lifeless way,
and the old wagon squeaked mourn
fully. Small, white-headed Jeff shuffled
his bare feet after each other in a
weary fashion, as if they were almost
too heavy to drag. Even the little
slate-colored dog at his heels trotted
along in a spiritless way, with droop
ing head and wagless tail. It was
only when Jeff stooped to caress the
small cur's head that both seemed
cheered up, as if each felt better for
the other's regard.
The sun seemed to shine in a weary
way through the haze, and the rocks,
stunted trees and barrens seemed to
have grown thoroughly disheartened
after years of staring into each oth
er's expressionless faces. Even na
ture seemed a prey to discourage
But where the discouragement
reigned supreme was at Très Pinos,
the mining camp toward which the
skinny mules and rickety wagon were
The most thoroughly discouraged
men in the discouraged camp of Très
Pinos were those that composed the
crowd in the Four Ace saloon. And
in there was one man more discour
aged than the rest that was Scotty
Très Pinos was discouraged be
cause, in the words of old man Raw
son, "everything that went at all
went plump dead wrong." Its mines
had virtually "petered out," and
with the disappearance of the camp's
prospects of prosperity of its citizens
and the hopes of the rest.
Then, too, to make the dose of ad
versity more bitter to swallow,
Boomapolis, the camp's hated rival
had not only struck rich "leads" al
most at the moment that those at
Très Pinos had "petered" but had
added indignity to the impartiality
of Providence by sending insulting
messages to the discouraged ones at
Très Pinos, inviting them to "come
out of the wilderness," and the like.
The crowing cause for discourage
ment had come that morning when
Lucky Ivens had announced that he
was going to remove the Four Ace to
As unenviably situated as his com
rades, with prospects of prolonged
thirst and little prosperity. Scotty
Bitts, always ill-natured, had given
up in disgusted discouragement after
his efforts to pick a fight with any
body in the room had failed, because
all were too dispirited to fight
After emphatically affirming that
he had never before met men so lack
ing in animation, or, as he expressed
it, "so dead in the shell," p gnacious
Mr. Bitts declared that he would whip
the first one who entered the door
' And as no one appeared, Scotty
lashed himself into a great rage and
seemed on the point of starting out
to hunt for a victim.
Then as he was anthemizing his
circumstances and surroundings a
boy, slight, light haired and bare
footed, and with a small, slate colored
dog in his arms entered timidly. Be
fore the lad could utter a word, Bitts
sprang forward, and snatched the
cur, howling, from his arms
" Yur, boys, ' ' Scotty shouted, ' 'yur's
a picnic ! I'll bet I can throw this pup
as high as the Four Ace an' shoot
him three times before he strikes the
The little dog yelped dismally, and
the boy burst into a cry of fear and
"Oh, mister," he cried, "don't
hurt Eli! Dont "
"Shut up!" roared Scotty, savage
ly, "you make more noise* than yer
blamed blue pup!"
"But, please, mister, don't hurt
him! Eli is sech a good dog an "
"Yes, good for a target!" cried
The small cur wriggled from
Scotty's grasp and fled to his bare
footed master, who picked him up
and huging the little slate-colored
body to his breast, started to run,
but Scotty grasped him before he
could reach the door, and snatched
the yelping dog from his arms.
"Looky yere, Scotty!" said old
man Rawson. "Let the dog alone!
Hain't you got no better
than pickin' on "
"Ole man," interrupted
grimly, " 'tend to yer own
an' you won't git hurt Dip
other people's business an '
He completed the sentence by tap
ping the handle of his huge revolver
significantly. Old Rawson subsided,
"Wal, what d'ye bring the dog yur
fer, any how?" Scotty demanded of
"To see if I couldn't Bell him. 01«
Dock, one uv the mules, has plumb
give out, an'—"
"Sell him!" roared Scotty, "w'v, a
blue dog like that hain't wuth two
whoops! What's he good fer? ''.
"Mebby .he hain't so awful mighty
valuable;" answered the boy, timidly,
"but he's mighty lovin', mister.
Please let EU go.
"Looky yere, Scotty," said old man
Rawsor, "I'll be durnèd if "
Shut up, old man!" was Scotty's
Rawson subsided again, to growl
in an undertone to several of his
comrades, who nodded their shaggy
heads as if they agreed with him.
"What d'ye want to sell him fer, if
he's so mighty lovin'?" Scotty de
manded of the boy.
"Oh, I wouldn't if I didn't haf to,"
answered the lad, "but he's all I've
got to sell, an' I thought mebby if I
was to tell how mighty gentle and
lovin' he was somebody'd bUy him
fersump'n.' An', oh, mister,'.' the
boy added, forgetting his fear in his
desire to vindicate Eli from the charge
of worthle8sne8S. "I've got to do
sump'n'. Ole Dock can't go no far
ther, an' my mother's that sick she
can't talk scarcelv, an' we hain't got
nuthin' to eat an no money to get a
doctor with, an'—"
"Whur'syer wagon?" interrupted
"Down by the ole stunted pine tree,
Scotty placed the whimpering dog
in his master's arms.
"Git!" was all he said.
The lad hugged the small slate-col
ored form of his favorite to his breast
and fled from the room. A momfftfc
later Scotty followed him. Then the
growls of old man Rawson became
audible and the assent of his com
rades more emphatic.
Throws that pore leetle feller's
pup up an' shoots at him, blamed if
Rawgon paused, at a loss for a
retaliatory measure to inflict on Mr.
"Throw Scotty up and shoot at
him!" suggested a friend.
'You bet!" was the chorus of as
Soon they followed Scotty. Before
they reached the three pines that had
given Très Pinos its name, they
could see why the rciketv covered
wagon in their shade could not pro
ceed. Even at that distance, it was
evident to their practiced eyes that
'Old Dock," the mule, was almost
past locomotion. Scotty Bitts was
standing on a forward hub of the
vehicle, and peering within. Near at
hand stood the boy, with the little
dog still clasped to his breast .
"Throws up that thar dog," mut
tered old man Rawson, "we'll throw
"You bet!" agreed his comrades.
As they neared the wagon, Scotty
descended from the hub, and they
could see something like a panto
mine going on between him and the
Ä moment later Bitts advanced
toward them with the small slate
colored dog in his arms.
"Boys ," he began.
"Looky yere, Scotty," interrupted
old man Rawson, while the rest of the
party came closer around him. "Me
an' the boys be'n talkin' this yere
matter over, an' we ."
"Glad you have," broke in Scotty,
half eagerly and half shamefacedly,
"fer I 'lowed to ast you to go in,
too. I've bought this yur leetle blue
pup, an'—-wal, when I got to the
wagon, the boy was inside an' I
heered him talkin' to his sick maw.
"I'm most glad I couldn't sell Eli,
he's so lovin',' the boy said, an' the
woman's weak voice piped: The
Lord'll provide, Jeffie, she says,
"You bet He will!" broke in old
"Yes, wal I bought the dog, an'—
wal, he's 'most too valuable adogfer
one man to own, an' I reckoned if
you wanted to form a sort uv a stock
"The Blue Dog Stock Company,"
cried old man Rawson. "We're in;
Èor answer, the "boys" fished from
their pockets what they could spare
of their scanty stores of wealth, and,
a moment later, quite a sum in silver
and bills were in the treasury of the
Blue Dog Company—old man Raw
"We haint exactly got no place to
keep such a mighty valuable animal,"
began Scotty shamefacedly.
"Yere, Jeff!" cried old man Rawson.
"Take off yer hat!"
The money was poured into little
Jeff's old hat and Rawson said:
"That'll buy a cheap mule, an' git
a doctor fer yer maw. An' the Blue
Dog Stock Company don't reckon it
kin keer uv its property, so—wal, take
the dog an' don't tell nobody whur
you're goin' an' when the company
wants its property it'll come after
As they faced about they heard lit
tle Jeff crying for very joy as he hug
Î;d to his heart the small blue dog
nd they strode along, the members
of the Blue Dog Stock Company were
not half as discouraged as that num
ber of Trees Pinos' citizens had been
but two hours before.—Chicago Inter
Endurance oi the Pergian "Yahoo."
The Persian horse enjoyed a pre
eminent reputation in ancient times,
and the poets and historians, both
native and Creek, have loudly praised
his fine build and fiery spirit. But to
day the Persian horse is a poor, much
abused creature, of ungainly shape,
knobby head, pot bellied, and rough
of coat. The natives call him "ya
boo," meaning a homely old critter.
The amount of work in these ani
mals is simply astounding. For
stance, in going from Teheran to
Resht (a distance of 298 miles),I used
chappar (post horses, the scrub
and fag of the yaboo race. Taking
one at Aghababa, a poor little fellow
that had done already what would be
thought to be a good day's work in
other countries, ne made the twenty
three miles to the station on top of the
Kharzan uiountain(12,000 feet high),
over a rough and rocky path, up and
down, up and down, after climbing
on steep mountain sides and down
monstrous declivities, in three and
and one-half hours. Next morning,
up at 4 o'clock, after a luxurious
breakfast of straw and a little barley,
the plucky little beast carried me an
even forty miles to Mendjeel, under a
broiling sun and over an execrable
Îiath, arriving at our destination "
ore noon. And then, while I 88
exhausted on a rug in the chappar
khane (post house), the little yaboo
was stUl as lively as a cricket. Where
else in this world are there horses to
do this, and do itall the days eftheir
lives?—Wolf Yon Schierbrand in Tha
Ufoll Bo L*B»ly
"Teê," h® «id, "life is so Ion
"It is lonely sometimes,
"Wouldn't it be sweet to have a little
cottage covered with ivy and honeys
suckle and rose bushes?'
"O! wouldn't it?" .
"And when a fellow oune home tired
from business to have a nice little wile
meet him at the door with a kiss. "
"And then the summer nights, the
windows open, the sunset just giving
light enough in the cozy parlor, and—
vou—I mean a wife at the piano singing
in the gloaming—it would be lovely.'
"And then "
At thin point a careworn woman oame
around the corner with a pair of twins
in a perambulator. A dead silence fell
upon the summer air for a little. Then
they changed the subject.—San Fran
▲ Caban Tribut« to Braitf
A Cuban letter in the Philadelphia
.Times relates the following incident as
happening upon a train: "A young fel
low passing a mother and radiantly
beautiful daughter on his way ont of the
car, doffed his hat, stood straight np and
tall before the couple he had never be
fore seen, and with the dignity of a ver
itable Don Quixote said in Spanish:
'Old woman, keep that daughter of
heavenly beauty for the unworthy one
before you!" Then he strode away. The
aged senora responded pleasantly: "I
will faithfully keep fieri' Nobody
thought amiss of the episode. That sort
of thing is of common occurrence upon
the street and in all publio places in
Cuba. The sociological exouse for it is
that beauty everywhere oompels and is
worthy of adoration."
Another of Fortune'« Favorit««.
Ga'reston (Tex.) Newt, July 7.
Each of the last two drawings of The
Louisiana State Lottery has left a large
slioe of the capital prize in this city,
viz., $15,000 in May and $15,000 in June.
The fortunate winner of the lost $15,000
was Mr. George W. Seibert, a resident
of Galveston and employed as book
keeper in the auditor's office of the
Gulf, Colorado & Santa Fe railway. Mr.
Seibert held one-twentieth of ticket No.
90,443 which won the capital prize of
! $00,000. A News reporter encountered
tfr. Seibert vesterday, and asked him
how he was enjoying his recently ac
quired fortune. "I admit," remarked
he, "that the suddenness with which the
unexpected good luck oame somewhat
unnerved me, but I think I have now
fully recovered from the shock, which,
by the way, is a very pleasant sort of
experience, which has to be felt to be
appreciated, as it cannot be properly
"Oh, yes; I got the money immedi
ately by depositing my ticket with Ball,
Hutchings & Co., without even having
to pay any discount or exchange."
"It was not my first venture and
doubtless will not be my last with the
Louisiana Lottery. I hav6 been buy
ing tickets for some time, and while I
never regarded it as an unprofitable in
vestment, I was not sanguine enough
to expect such good luck as the winning
of a capital prize."
The race-track starter is the man who Is
taken at his word.
Sb« Couldn't Understand It.
"What in the world has happened to
you since the last time I saw you"? asked
one lady of another when they met on the
street the other day: '*1 can't understand
it. Then you were pale, haggard and low
spirited, and I remember you said that you
hardly cared whether you lived or died.
To-day you look ever so much younger,
and it is very evident from your beaming
face that your low spirits have taken
flight." "Yes, indeed;" was th^epiy; "and
shall I tell you what drove them away? I G
was Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription. I
was a martyr to functional derangement
until I began taking the 'Prescription.'
Now I am as well as I ever was in my life.
No woman who suffers as I did, ought to
let an hour pass before procuring this won
Judge Thurman has a fortune ot about
How to Reduce Yonr Expense«.
You can do it easily, and you will not
have to deprive yourself of a single com
fort; on the contrary, you will enjoy life
more than ever. How can you accomplish
this result? Easily; cut down your doc
tor's bills. When you lose your appetite,
and become bilious and constipated, and
therefore low-spirited, don't rush off to tha
family physician for a prescription, or, on
the other hand, wait until you are sick
abed before doing anything at all. but just
go to the druggist's and for twenty-five
cents get a supply of Dr. Pierce's Pleasant
Purgative Pellets. Take them as directed,
and our word for It, your unpleasant
symptoms will disappear as if by magic,
you will have no big doctor's biH to pay,
and everybody interested (except the doc
tor), will feel happy.
Tke Archduke John of Austria has been
restored to official favor.
1c a good thing to get, and the man who
wins it by superior skill, or by an unex
pected turn of Fortune's wheel, is to be
congratulated. But he who escapes from
the clutches of that dread monster, Con
sumption, and wins back health and hap
piness, is far more fortunate. The chances
of winning $100,000 are small, but every
consumptive may be absolutely sure of re
covery, if he takes Dr. Pierce's Golden
Medical Discovery in time. For all scrof
ulous diseases (consumption is one of
them), it is an unfailing remedy. All drug
Mrs. Laugtry's father is reported to
have had only $25 when he died.
Clark—"Well, I will declarel 8mithers,
how you have picked up lately." Smith
ers—"Yes, yes; things were bad enough
with me a little while back, but I happened
to run across the advertisement of B. F.
Johnson <fe Co., of Richmond, Va., and
they put me in position to make money
right along. If you know of anybody else
needing employment here is their name
With defaulters it is fly-time at any sea
son of the year.
LID IUI Ol tUV Mia oi nvjipw "/J
and permanently cured by the use V<etert
y-ry flarheltsalTe. 50c. and 91 at Druggiit*.
How to get erea with gome men—Pay
them what you owe them.
Miss Jennie Hannum, who recently
attended Elliott's Business College,
Burlington, Iowa, has secured a good
position at Ft. Ma dison, Iowa .
The cholera m phantom appears to be a
ghostly sort oi disease.
The Remarkable Growth of «heMoxl»
It was only three years ago that this
Central American plant, Moxie Nerve
Food, first came into use. Now it is the
common beverage o! the leading people of
the United States. To satisfy the Dublic in
ciedulity, the company offered $5,000 if
they could not prove it bad recovered
hopeless, helpless cases of old paralysis;
helpless men under the liquor appetite; in
valid women, completely broken with ner
vous exhaustion until utterly wrecked^ -
cases medicine could not help.
It's a mighty poor tramp that hasn't
got a scent.
Half Bate Bxearelons.
The first of the series o! Harvest excur
sions via the Missouri Pacific railway and
Iroa Mountain route to Arkansas and
Texas, will leave August 21st; others to
follow September 11th and 25th, October
9th and 23d. Tickets will be sold at one
fare for the round trip with a limit of
thirty days te return and ample stöp-ovee
There is no tick in the silent watches el
'When Baby was sick, we gave her Cartagia,
When she was a Child, ikeoM ferOestorla,
Whsa she had ChiUna, As gave t
Th* I« Nebrn*k«
firo-lhlrdsof the peop'c of Ne?>ra**a are republl
cant It It safe io prodiet ihat Harrison aad Morton
will carry ib * i»r from twrnry-flve to thirty
thou*BOvl inajoflrr. T.iis majority is atsured even
If every r«*p ii>llc in ever,* republican ca:u
T«isn orator ien:itn nur* oath,' r.attonal Issue*
from now until tUe 31 of Hovembor. IIut there are
Usuet vital to ilie per -»pie th:« state which must
be fought ou* in ttao open areav lu this irrepressi
b.e coutest party lines eanaot saf '-y be drawn.
The p» op> of Nebraska ar? confronted w!t h grave
problems with which the next legislature moet
ple. Nebraska is on • of the most taxrlddtn states
lu America. State tttet s e" hlftier in Nebraska
than In any state in the uni -n, excepting alone Ne
vada. With a debt of l- s< than h:\l? a million, of
which over fo ir hun ired th >.;^a id dollars is Leid by
the permanent *cho >1 fund. Nebraska last year lev
led a sta e i\\ of Uglily--o.ie cents ou the hundred
Aollars of assessed valuation. The state of Louisi
ana, with a state debt of nearly twelve millions, lev
ies attate tax of only slxtv cents oÄ the hundred
dollars. North Carolina with a state debt of over
fifteen millions levies a state tax of only twenty-live
cents on the hundred dollars. The state tax in
Iowa ls twcnty-Avc cents, in Ktnsas forty-one cents,
Minnesota thirteen cents, aud N isconsin fifteen and
three quarter cents on the hundred dollars. The
Ordinary running expenses of this state for saUrlet
and maintaining rate institutions are over one mil
lion a year, an i toe last legislature piled up appro
priation» c or another millicn a year which have to
he wrung from a people heavily burdened with
county and municipal taxes. How It this exhausting
drain tobe checked? How are the people to secure
tax reduction and a more équitable distribution of
the burdens of taxation? Can these needed reformt
be secured unless the next stale officers and legisla
tors are men of Integrity and raeu who canaot be
swayed from their duty?
This is only one of the issues The ever t>r«*sslng
and èver present railroad issue must be met and the
Hues must be sharply defined between honest men
who will faithfully represent the people, aad venal
rogues who want to sell out or intend to use their
positions for levying blackmail, lîraxen throated
railroad vo l icitnt and profossiou:\l Jobbers will, as
usual, howl themselves hoarse over the national
issues In order to befog the taxpayers, and *eek to
keep tie issues in which the people are more vitally
concerned In the background. They will dfseuss
protect ion and free trade when the people want
to hear about revision of the state assessment laws
and railroad regulation They will fltfbt over the
battles of the war. but make no reference to the
scandalous debauchery of our legislature and the
law defying courte of the railroads. It remains
to be seen, however, whether the people of a state
that proudly boasts its intelligence can l>e deceived
and distracted by such tactics, it remains to be
seen whether they will blindly support "yellow dog"
candidates because they were tagged and labeled
straight by a packed convention. The campaign in
Nebraska has already begun. The industrial classes
must do their duty. Let them rally and unite, re
gardless of party, to elect honest, competent and
unpurchasable men to the next legislature. The
B kc proposes to do its full share of the work to re
deem the stale from monopoly misrule. With this
end in view it will labor earnestly until the legltlep
tnre convenes. We want to place a copy of the
Wkiki.t ItEsin the hands of every farmer and me
chanic and appeal to friends of good government to
aid us. We will furnish the W iekly Bik from
now until the end of the year for thirty-five ceutt. or
In clubs of ten for three dollars. Address all ordert
IfTui Bke P ublish mo Co. Omaha, Neb.
Wet tobacco applied to a bee or waap
•ting will give instant relief.
Dyspepsia comes from neglect of the
simplest rules of right living.
For The Nervous
Medical and scientific riill hae at laat solved the
problem of the lonsr needed medicine for the ner.
Tons, debilitated, and the a trod, by combining the
beet nerve tonioe. Celery snd Ceca, with other effeo
tiTO remediee, which, acting gently but eminently
en the kidneys, liver and bowels, remove diseeee.
(Mtoie strength and reuew v itality. ïhisnitdiciaei»
;*Jt 1118 a plac« btretofore umoccnpi^d, and mark»
a B«w era in the treatment of nervou« trouble«.
Overwork, anxiety, disease, lay the foundation of
nervous prostration and weakness, and experionos
has shown that the usual remedies do not mend the
■train and paralysis of the nervous system.
Recommended by professional and b usi nes s mam.
Bond for circulars.
Price S I.OO. Sold by drnffiat®.
WELLS, RICHARDSON & CO., Proprietor«
DUTOHER'S FLY KILLER 11
Ko hunting with pewder and gun as for »qulrrels
only to stupTfr tlient. No lingering death on the
«tricking plaster. Files seek It, drink and are
humanely, so quickly tliev cannot get nway. Use It
freely. Prevent reproduction, secure sereae peace
sad quiet. Always ask for UlITtUKO.
VRED'K DUTCH EH, St. AI bun», Vt.
MID CALLAHAN COLLEGE
Open n.zt S«»slon Sept. 11th. Llt«rary, Nermal,
Commercial, Mimical, Art. Bible, Law and Medi
cal Department*. 50 able Inatrncters i FaclUWee
cal Departments. 60 able Instructor« : FactUMe»
go perler-, Kip. mes Low ; Surroundings Pleasant.
M tt.T.Carpenter. Chandler, Des MolaeM^
■tût UfïSflEC Atth» r a»th.yhav«beaiL-_
«a DM. t.mut u uÂLal a th. Su il»« «■ m St.tè par Hfl
Wtat te M ke ClIKm# Wter» "«
ni,««. *.» * ■■■ l in rf»U8t»M tmiuii*i«Jl»mL
M* rMdn «S* IttiaMful lairfteiKa. % NMnHii ?*»»■» M
M h » Al tin IHl/M'fUUIWOHU.Ofcle—«.Hl.
Bend for our catalogue, kc., on Well Höring
Coal Preipeetln* .Machine*, ëce.
LOOMI8 a NYMAN, TIFFIN. OHIO.
Bonod with Feather
bone. Absolutely un
breakable. Soft, pli
able snd elastic. Btorr of Festherbone free. Address
M FlATHXBBONE. M S Oaks, MlckUsa.
A MONTH ce» be
made working for us.
furnish ahorse and give
their whole time to the bnstness. Spare moments
Ualn Street. Richmond, Va.
$75.^ to $250 £2
Agents pcrf erred who can ft
w» lerne Illustrated Ca1
„ TOUCHES, FLAGS,
), ETC. Send for
lerge Illustrated Catalogue FREE
ö - r -
FASTILLES.m 5 ^ b l^
B. 8. & A. P. LACKY,
Patent Attorneys, Washing
tQ Q , D. C. Instructions and
patentability roiE. 20 yrs. experien ce.
By return mall. Fall Deecrlptlea
IlMdv's New Tall.r Bystees ,f BfSia
CatUa«. M009T * CO.. Oi a siaaati.
V opinions on patentabll
PlSOS CURE FOR CONSUMPTIO M
n as ■ lit . at fco«, aad mak« mor. loo.'T w.tk«n*«»r tu tbaa
KB n *r riHv Samples worth tl.5 •FKJCE.Liaet
lao'under 25 hors, s te«. Write Browatar
Safety Rain Hold erCo. t Holl». Mon.
i. worth «• per lbT retlfs" Eye salve
worth »LOOUbut issold »t 36ca be* by dealer*
W. H. D„ Omaha, 42C—33.
•1.00. Sold by Drnggi: -
ryant & Stratton Chicago Business College
SHOUT-HAND IN8TITUTI and ENOL..H "^NOOOHOOL^Jtb. «TASUAK
b k S mt ^££^Ch ,e.,.. in .
MILLIONS ptople wLi
By the a till« or ot
10,000 AGENTS WANTED fo supply FIFTY
THE LIFE OF
w w.n .v. .minan' a nthnp Qt*rpum un T)!nlnniat
alnnt streets. Kansas City, Mo.
A DELICIOUS BISCUIT
ask your grocer for
DWIGHT'S "COW BRAND" SODA
and take no other.
Weak and Weary
Dercrtbci the condition of mnny people éeMllUt«4
by the wsrm weather. •>? dtse»*e or OTerwertc.
llood'« Saniperlll* I» Ju* «he mrdlcleo needed te
OTereone th*t «red feeling, to portfy »nd çuicfce»
tke Wood, end restore she low »ppet'te. li
»en need • ios4 medicine be i«re to try Hood'» Sei
"My appetite vu poor. 1 conld not alerp. hed heed
«che » greet deal, peln« In my beck, my i>ovrelJ die
not move regularly. Hood'« Sariaparllia In a shot.'
time Old me so ranch good that I tee'« 'lko » "C* man.
My pains end aches are reUered, m/ appetite .io*
proTsd." Stomas t. J acssox. lSJXbury Station,
Seid by all drags' sta. si* for «V Proper,'d only
by C. I. HOOD A CO., Apothecar!o\ Lowe I: Mass.
IOO Dosas One Dollar
For FAMILY USE
CUBES ALL .
Internal or External.
It was the first aad ts the only Patn remedy that
Instantly »top* the most eicruoNtlnir pain«,
Inflammation aad cures Congestion*, whether ot tno
Lanes. Stomach. Powels, or other ariauils or organs.
No vattsr how vlo'.ent ©rçxerutMafln* t he pslnth»
Rheumat a. Bedridden, lnArm. Criopled. Nervous,
Neuralgia, or prostrated with dltesses may suffer,
MIDWAY'S READY RELIEF
will afford Instant ease.
Thirty to stzty drops In half a tumbler of water
will lu a few minutes eure Crsuips, Sour
Stomach. Nausea Vomiting, Palpitation
lleart Talntness, Heartburn. 8'Ck llcadarli- j . Dial*
rhea. Dysentery, Colic, Wind la the ilowels, and all
There Is not a remedial agent In ihe world thai
will oure Fever aud Ague, and all other MaHrlo««.
Billon, and other ferors. aided hy Hail way s 1 ills, S»
Quick as Radway's Ready Belief.
tittr oenta per Bottle. Bold by druggists.
. will open Tueidny!
The rpacions and elegant
EDUCATE YOUR SONS.
EBdaw tfceas with a lsgacy that they cannot squander,
by seadtag them to be educated at the
UNIVERSITY OF KOTRE DAME.
T¥e Uife cellegla te ye
buildings h»Ts. during the piu«t y r r .. —
M0 resident students. Every facility Is afforded fur
acquiring a thorough kmowled*o of
Classics, Msthcsistlca, Law, Scleucc snd
A thorough Commercial Cosrse Is also a dis
tinguished feature of the Institution.
Special advantages aro offered to students of the
THE MINIM DEPARTMENT.
A separate Institution (St. Kdward's Halh for boys
mader IS years of age, who are taught by the
SISTERS OF TUE HOLY CROSS,
under whoee maternal care ther paee nearly the cnt! e
day in receiving instructions in the eiemeutitr y brand, cs
ther with a fundament»!
German, Vocal Musio,
ef ma KngUah «datation, together with a fundament»!
knowledge of LaMo. Freach. German, Vocal Mttale,
Violia, Plaae aad Drawing, preparatory to ontar either
th. Junior or Senior classe, of th. Univt-rsity.
Board, washing, asandiag, tnltlon aud entranc" feo
for maton of Ore month. In Minim l).p«rtnn nt i»>.
— - atfkty-atgktk MKlon will npm Tu.ada y . Se* ♦ 111
-afor. «oaelndlag where to pi»»» your >on» i* w ir.U
send for a catalog!«, which will h. «ant fi ac, ami you
will fiad fall particulars aa to Conrsa of study, terms,
at«., with Illustration, of the main building, of Notre
AaklzM*. Kiv. T. K. Wms. O. 8. c.. Pre».
University Notre Dainc. lud.
NE WS PAPER PU BU SHE RS
Western Newspaper Union.
Whenever needing anything in way
of job stock, print paper, outfits or
printing material of any kind, ink, rol
lers or stereotyping, don't fail to get
our prices. You will save money by bo
Our Ready Prl»«» arc llio Beul.
If you are contemplating starting a
new paper you should not fail to see ua
before closing a deal.
If you are not receiving T he P rint -
er «' A uxiliary , our monthly, send for
it. Free to every printer or publisher.
WESTERN NEWSPAPER UNION,
OM AII /ft. 1*1311.
ISiUiO USI _
THAT M JOlf
«KM 1 MALL
M AHM THIf
BEST IN TH« WORLD. —
Ual th« 0«nola«. Eytj Id* Marked FB4ZCF
V. 3. CtudAril
Sent o» trial. Freigkt
3 TON $35.
•tely low. Agents well paid,
tree. Meation this Paper
Other siie» oroporti»»
W9V. «WIWVII Ma— r , w
OSGOOD M THOMPSON. Biazlumtca, N. I
_ , RIFLE
ïew Model 1888.
Winchester OMtrilqt. Jost Ont.
Werk s saeier, U etmjUr,
etrenter, lifUtr, t Aa» any other
MR'T BÜY TMX y99 *■» IT.
•ALLIII, MINTIM AM TAUET KIFIES.
CIKMMirS MENTHOL INHALüS.
™ llnstantlT r.lleTCT OA
OIA. HAY TB VIR.
si .Miiiia.il Ma .déeta oernaanaat care. SinsHcnos
■vaaanna. Inhaler aent by »all en recoipt of M
Mata. If after *ne waak's trial yon ar.
reSera la r*«e order, jraur mener wtU be refnn4eC
j - ij alT Druaclsta. Send yeur naas and (at
KaatSnl carda kr retut »all FMÏ.
H. ö- CCiHltAII. Bex W. Three Btan, Bäk.
THE MUTUAL LIFE INSURANCE COMPANY
The Large«*, Cheapest and Best la the World.
«II. F. ALLES.
I preicrlbe and fell y
done »lg O a» the on!
gnecilcferthe certain cu.
oi this dlseaee. „
Amsterdam, N. '
We ha to sold Big G i<
many year«, and it t
gl ren the best et sat..
D. R. DYCHE & CO
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