The Caldwell tribune. [volume], November 01, 1890, Image 4

About The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928

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THE TRIBUNE.
CALDWELL, IDAHO, NOV. I, 1890.
PUBLISHED SATURDAY liY
Stcuncnbcrg Bros., Proprietors.
Subscription,
£3.00 Per Annum.
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Locals ten cents per lino for first insertion;
iflve Cents for each subsequent Insertion
George Mulligan and a boy
named Brown, each about 18 years
of age, climbed on top of a passen
ger coach at Creston, Iowa, one
morning, lately intending to steal
a ride to Council Bluff*. At the
first covered bridge beyond Red
Oak, Mulligan raised his head and
was instantly killed by a rafter of
the bridge. His companion grasped
the body and held it on the car
with great difficulty. This train
does not stop at small stations and
the terrified boy had a fearful ride
for many miles with his dead
friend before he succeeded in at
tracting the attention ot the train
men, who stopped the train.
It is declared in railroad circles
that the Union Pacific road is
forcing the Western roads to boy
cott it in order to depress the Btock
to the lowest possible point, when
the Vanderbilts will take it all in.
A firm of New York importers
will test the validity of the worsted
classification act on the ground
that there was no quorum present
in the House when the Speaker de
clared the bill passed.
Ex-Secretary Whitney is said to
have a sure thing on the United
States Senatorship, provided the
>?ew York Legislature is Demc
cretic. Lamont is managing the
l)00m.
A double pneumatic tube line is
to be established between New
"York and Philadelphia. Small
packages will be carried at the rate
of four miles a minute.
During Eyraud trial at Paris
hypnotic experiments will be made
in court, as Gabriel Bompard
claims that she assisted the mur
derer while hypnotized.
Vice-President Lane of the Union
Pacific says "a few" accidents hav
recently occurred on the road, but
none have involved any eeri
damage.
Two million dollars in English
sovereigns wero received at San
Krancisco in exchange for Ameri
can exports to Australia, tecently
All the Western Union operators
at St. Paul have struck on account
of the dischagre of six members of
the Brotherhood.
Balfour is said to be deeply im
pressed by the scenes of wretched
ness he witnesses among the starv
ing Irish.
*
In a recent exgagei^nt between
Paul du Chaillu, tho African
explorer, says bad blood exists
between Stanley and his lieuten
ants.
Director of the mint Loech offers
a lengthy explanation of th «.'depres
sion in the silver market.
the French and Senegalese, 500 of
five latter were slain
It is reported that letters of recall
}iave been sent the Portugese Min
ister to England.
SOME NEW YARNS.
Was Dives a Republican or Democrat'
—Horr and Springer Take Differ
ent Sides.
A good story is told concerning
the discussion between Hon. Wil
liam Springer and Hon Roswell G.
Horr at Monticello, N. Y., on Sep
tember 4. In hiB speech Mr.
Springer said that for twenty-five
years the Republican party had
been promising protection for the
farmer. Yet the farmer was get
ting poorer every year. He hoped
he would not get to be as poor as
Dives, who was forced to beg for
a drop of water to cool his parched
tongue.
In his reply, Mr. Horr alluded
to the fact that Mr. Springer had
referred to Dives. "You might
know," contiuued the great Michi
gander, "that Dives was not a
Democrat, or he would have howled
for whisky."
In his return speeoh, Mr. Spring
er said that it was entirely unneces
sary to inform the audience that
Dives was not a Democrat. He
rolled in wealth. He was a bloated
bondholder. His very names indi
cated riches. Tfye last that was
heard of him he was in hell where
no Democrat ever went! The
truth was that Dives was a hypo
critical Republican, and seeing so
many of his hypocritical faith
around him when he was in trouble
he howled for water because he
was afraid somebody would ask
him to treat, and he did not want
to offend the Prohibitionists.
Another excellent story concern
ing Springer and Horr comes from
Chautauqua county. They had a
joint debate at Jamestown on Sep
tember 2. Jamestown is in Laid
law's district and is strongly Re
publican. There was an immense
crowd of Republicans around the
stand. Mr. Springer opened the
discussion. In making his points
concerning the iniquity of the
McKinley tariff he read extracts
from different books to support his
views.
When Mr. Horr arose to reply
he referred to the fact that Mr
Springer had been reading from
books. He called him a book
worm, and scoffed at the idea that
he could obtain any correct infor
mation from books. All the col
lege professors, he said, were free
traders. Springer was like then».
"What we want," continued Mr.
Horr, "is practical talk by practi
cal men—men who don't get their
information from books, but who
reason the thing ©ut for themselves
from experience, men who can
handle a plow, make an axe-helve,
and know how to hang an axe.
These are the men who are capable
of giving us correct information on
the tariff,"
Mr. Springer, in reply, said that
Mr. Horr had talked an hour and
a half. He need not talk about
books. No one who heard him
would suspect for a momont that
he had ever looked into one.
"You can readily see," Mr.
Springer added, "that he lias
drawn upon his imagination for
hi« facts, and upon a stale old
almanac for his wit."
Still another campaign storv
about Roswell G. Horr came from
Elmira. Horr and William L.
Wilson of West Virginia, appeared
before an agricultural association
there to discuss the tariff. Wilson
piade one of his brilliant speeches,
and apparently deeply impressed
the honest farmers. Horr followed
in bis usual style. He wore an
old-fashioned, turn-down collar and
llap trousers. It is said he had !
been handling butternuts so as to j
give his hands a weather-beater.
appearance. He had not been
shaved for six week?, and lie wore
cow-hide boots, Jle began bv
referring to Mr. Wilson as a lawyer,
whose sophistries were calculated
to deceive the honest agriculturist.
As for himself, he was a plain
farmer with no pretentions to
superior knowledge. He wanted to
talk to them from a practical
point of view. Then he opened
his tariff budget in a homely strain,
streaked with humor and embel
lished with good stories. An old
farmer with a chip hat three years
old, an antique coat and a pair of
overalls stood in front of him,
drinking in every word word. He
never took his eye from the speaker.
He laughed immoderately at his
jokes, and danced with delight
when he heard one of his stories.
After securing the the attention
of his audience, Horr asserted that
the protective tariff had endeared
itself to the farmers. It had
raised ihe price of grain and
reduced the price of calico. Ad
dressing the farmer who stood with
open mouth before him, he said
"My friend, years ago you paid 25
cents a yard for calico. Under
protective tariff it has been coming
down all the time, till now, under
the Harrison administration and
in the shadow of the McKinley bill
it has reached 6 cents a yard
Now, my friend, tell me how much
you paid for it when the M orison
bill and Mills bill were threatening
the country?"
The old farmer wiped the tobacco
juice from his mouth and blurted
out, "3 cents a yard."
Horr started as though he had
heard a clap of thunder, and Wil
son almost dropped form his seat
with laughter.
Then it was the farmer's turn
He began to ask Mr. Horr embar
rassing tariff question and finally
completely broke him up.
While in Hudson, N. Y., Mr
Springer heard a characteristic
story of General John H. Ketchum
For five years the General has
been trying to get an appropria
tion of $100,000 for a public build
ing in Hudson. He got it through
this Congress before hot weather
set in. To his surpise, however
the President'vetoed the bill. The
gerteral ripped and tore around the
House for several days, and finally
concluded that he Would go to the
White house and relieve his mind
Rumorsfof the general's anger had
reached the ears of the President
He determined to avoid an inter
view. When the general sent in
his card the usher returned it say
ing: "I am very rorry, but the
President can not be seen."
"What! whatl" exclaimed the
general, with his hand to his ear
"Great heavens! so small as that?
A moment afterwards, recovering
from his astonishment, the general
added: ',W£11, see here. Please
present my compliments to the
President as soon as you can see
him, and say that I will call to
morrow and bring a microscope
with me.
blocked. The
smiled serenely
Anent the recent election cases
in House, where two colored men
were contesting seats held by
Democrats, a fine story of Watch
dog Holtnan is told. The incident
occured in the Forty-seventh Con
gress. A segro of the name of Lee
was contesting the seat held bv
Mr. Richardson, now the governor
of South Caralina. The case was
pressed for consideration toward
the close of that Congress. It got
the right-of-way and held the
legislative track. Some big steals
which the watch-dog and Sam
Randall were fighting were thus
old watch-dog
when the Lee
Richardson case was fairly under
way. Ho eat down and read over
the report. Then he exjiectorated
to the right and left, hooked <j.nd
unhooked his eye-glassess. Finally,
turning to a Democratic member
near him, he said:
"My! my! Have you read this
report? You must read it. You
read it."
"What is it about?" queried the
Representative. "That nigger Lee."
Yes, yes," the judge responded,
Mr Lee, Mr. Lee. He's a very
valuable nigger to the country
worth his weight in gold in this
emergency. He'll prevent the
stealing of millions from the
treasury."
Apropos of the Beating of negro
contestants in the House Hon.
Asher G. Çaruth tells a good story.
In slavery days a negro ran
away from Kentucky in Canada.
Not long after he got there he took
a contract to cut 100 cords of wood
at 50 cents a cord. Two er three
days afterwards the Canadian who
had hired him was riding through
the forest. He was surprised to
see a stranger cutting wood there.
He hailed him and asken him what
he was doing. "Why," said the
woodman, "I'm cutting wood for
Ben, the colored man."
"How much is he giving you?
asked the land-owner.
"Six bits a cord," was the reply.
The next day the land-ower saw
the darky. "Ben," he said, "there
is a man cutting wood up on my
land and he says von hired him."
"Yes, boss, yes," Baid the darkey.
"How much are you giving him?"
"Six bits a cord, boss."
"Why," said the land owner to
ihe darky, "what a fool you are.
I'm only giving you four bits a
cord. Fifty cents is only four bits."
"Never mind dat boss, never
mind dat." replied the darky
"Dat's all right I'm a givin' him
de extra two bits to git to boss a
white man. "
"W ET
Bob Up
Serenely !
We are now ready for business at our
new store in the Masonic Build
ing and invite you all to
Come and See Us.
We Are the People's
Servants- Try Us
Stiles & Dunbar,
Caldwell.
&
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$
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Tt
M
tho best on earth.
OAKEÖ BROTHERS.
uO-W
ALBS
P()1
Absolutely Pure.
A cream of tarter baking powder. Highest
of all in leavening strength.—U. S. Govern
ment Report, Aug. 17, 1889. •
Pianos! Pianos! Pianos!
Buy the Celebrated
MARSHALL & WENDELL
PIANOS
Famous for beautiful tone and
durability. For terras address
Marshall & Wendell, Albany,
New York, or
W. A. SMITH,
Butte, Mont.
S. L. MORROW,
BLACKSMITH
Having purchased ray old
stand back again, I respectfully
invite my old friends and pat
rons to call and see me. I am
better prepared than ever to
do all kinds of work at reason
able prices. Horse shoeing a
specialty.
Notice to Contractors.
Call on Jndge Beaty and see specification»
of school building to be let, at Jordan Valley,
Oregon, and send in your bids.
Trustees, Dist. No. 3,
Malheui Co. Oregon.