Newspaper Page Text
THE OAKLEY EAGLE
By CHAULES T- DIEHL IDAHO OAKLEY Happiness Is nothing more or less than learning to enjoy your own so ciety. It will be the treaty of Washington, although made at Portsmouth, in the state of Maine. Why should not Fitzsimmons "re turn to the ring"? He can talk as loud as the best of them. A dealer says that more thermome ters are sold In winter than in sum mer. How foolish people «re! A Yale professor who died recently actually left a small fortune. He was an exception to the rule, however. Most housekeepers will look with suspicion upon a hired girl that holds stock in the newly formed pottery trust. Gen. Chreschchatitzki will never get himself mentioned often by the Eng lish-speaking world, even if he does prove a hero. New Jersey Is making a strenuous ■war on mosquitoes, but there will be enough of them left, undoubtedly, to convey the idea. Being an inland country saves Swit zerland a lot of trouble. She hasn't even been invited to take part in the Moroccan conference. Col. Mann has bounced his manag ing editor. Evidently the colonel had reason to suspect that something was the matter somewhere. Unless the "Fads and Fancies" book contains at least one chapter on mon key dinners it cannot be considered a really representative work. If we are to be given many such plays "All-of-a-sudden-Peggy" it will become necessary to star the hyphen. "Alice-sit-by-the-flre" and as Most of the land on earth having been apportioned, some of the powers are now beginning to quarrel over spheres of influence on the ocean. Although a small nation, Holland bears more than Ur share of the white man's burden. A Dutch expedition has just killed 260 natives of Celebes. Quite possibly It is a wise provision of nature that most millionaires are disinclined to work. If they were not, we might be affected with billion aires. That Massachusetts letter carrier who has been In the service fifty years has probably delivered love letters enough to make a thousand cyclo pedias. Col. Mann says they sent all over the world for hides to bind "Fads and Fancies." How foolish! Why not use the hides of the subscribers they skinned? E. H. Harriman says "there are too d—d many reporters." He is enthusi astically supported in this opinion by Nicholas Romanoff and Samuel W. Pennypacker. Handicapped as they are by being called "the senators," how could any body expect the members of the Wash ington baseball club to put any ginger into their playing. Wizard Burbank says perfect men may be produced in the same way that he is producing superior fruit. Evidently the wizard has never tackled an unruly boy. It grows increasingly difficult to get into society. At one time a whiff of gasoline was almost an open sesame, but norv it Is necessary to have been mutilated in an automobile collision. It was the woman who dreamed that her husband had given her the goods for a new gown who waked to a realizing sense of what the poet meant by "the baseless fabric of this vision." Statistics show that only 15 per cent of the people who are run over by au tomobiles receive fatal injuries. Still, the distinction of having been run over by an automobile is hardly worth even that risk. It Is something to the credit of Mr. William Waldorf Astor that he the only man in the Vanderbilt and Astor families that declined to be come a subscriber for the famous "Fads and Fancies" book. w'as "All the members of the Dutch cabi net have resigned." It takes some thing of that sort occasionally to re- I mind us that there is such a place as | Holland.—Richmond News-Leader. And yet The Hague Is there. —-— One "V. R." writes to the New York Times as follows: "It is hard work tor an educated man trying to keep tab on the inaccuracies of the press." His beautifully rounded statement is evidence that he writes from personal experience. The eight Pittsburg women who ■were seriously hurt In a bargain coun ter rush for men's 10-cent overalls and ehlrts were obviously influenced by the unselfish desire that every woman has to sacrifice herself for her hus band's sake SAW THE FEET OF CLAY. Charlotte Brants Disturbed at Appe tlte of Her Ideal. As a child Charlotte Bronta adored Thackeray, long before the author ot "Vanity Fair" became known to her personally. At last the two met, and here Is Thackeray's version of that memorable first meeting, as related by one of his blgraphers. "Behold a lion eometh up out of the North!" the girl quoted under neath her breath, as Thackeray en tered the drawing-room. Some one re peated it to him. "Good gracious!" said Thackeray, "and I am nothing but a poor speci men of an Englishman, ravenous for my dinner." At dinner Miss Eronte was placed opposite Thackeray by her own re quest. "And I had," said he, "the miserable humiliation of seeing her ideal of me disappearing down my throat, as ev erything went Into my throat and nothing came out of it, until at last, as I took my fifth potato, she leaner) across, with clasped hands and tears In her eyes, and breathed imploring ly: "'Oh, Mr. Thackeray, don't!'" The Reason Why. Drummond, Wis., Aug. 21st (Spe cial)—Whole families County are singing the praises of Dodd's Kidney Pills and the reason why is given in experiences such as that of Mr. T. T. Wold, a well-known Citizen here. "I had such pains In my back that I Jid not know what to do," says Mr. Wold, "and as I came across an adver tisement of Dodd's Kidney Pills, I lent for a box. That one box reliev ed me of all my pains. My wife also used them and found them just what Ihe needed. I recommend Dodd's Kid ney Pills as a sure cure for Back ache and other Kidney Troubles." Backache is one of the earliest symptoms of Kidney Disease. Dodd's Kidney Pills cure it promptly and per manently and prevent it developing into Rheumatism, Dr&psy, Diabetes or Bright's Disease. in Bayfield Speed of Submarine Boats. Submarines can travel seventy or eighty miles at a speed of eight or nine miles an hour under water, can regulate their position at any able depth, and can move or turn In my direction. reason UBF. THE FAMOUS Rrfl Cross Hall Blue, t.urgo 1Ï cents. Tbe Kuss Company, South Bend, Ind. package I EXCLUSIVENESS AS A FAULT. Man's Weakness in Separation from Rest of His Kind. A man is but a cluster on the great human grapevine. He begins to dry up the moment he is cut off from his fellows. Ther Is something in the solidarity of the human race which cannot be accounted for in the sum total of all the individuals. Separa tion from the mass involves a mighty loss of power In the Individual, just as there Is a loss of cohesion and ad hesion Involved in the separation of the molecules and atoms of the dia mond. The value of the gem Is In the close contact, the compactness, and the concentration of the particles which compose It. The moment they are separated Its value is gone. So a strong, effective man gets a large part of his strength from the vital connection with his fellows.—Success Magazine._ Why "Tawdry" Laces. A curious bit of English history Is preserved in the word "tawdry." acquired its present meaning from the phrase "tawdry laces" a corrup tion of "St. Audrey laces," sold at St. Audrey's fair, which was the same as St. Ethelreda'8 fair, queen of Ely and died in the year 679. Made His Name Remembered. Capt. H. Wilkinson was the first person to set foot upon the Antarctic continent, land in 1854. it Ethelreda was of Northumberland and abbess He landed in Victoria WRONG SORT Perhaps Plain Old Meat, Potatoes and Bread may Be Against You for a Time. A change to the right kind of food can lift one from a sick bed. A lady ln Weiden, 111., says: "Last Spring I became bed-fast with severe stomach trouble accompanied by sick headache. I got worse and worse until I became so low I could ecarcely retain any food at all, al though I tried every kind. I had be come completely discouraged, had giv en up all hope and thought I was doomed to starve to death, till one day my husband trying to find some thing I could retain brought home some Grape-Nuts. "To my surprise the food agreed with me, digested perfectly and with out distress. I began to gain strength at once, my flesh (which had been flabby) grew firmer, my health im I Proved in every way and every day. | a " d in a ver >' ,ew weeks I gained 20 pounds In weight. I liked Grape-Nuts so well that for 4 months I ate no other food, and always felt as well sat tsfled after eating as if I had sat down to a fine banquet. "1 had no return of the miserable sick stomach nor of the headaches. that I used to have when I ate other food. I am now a well woman, doing all my own work again, and feel that life is worth living. "Grape Nuts food has been a god send to my family; it surely saved my life and my two little boys have thriv en on it wonderfully." Name given by Postum Co., Battle Creek, Mich. There's a reason. Get tbe little book. "The Road to Wellvllle," in each pkg. 8UAKEO seed in brandy. Vermont Woman Tries Experiment With Unexpected Results. An item appeared In the Barre Times one day early last week which told how to raise lettuce in forty-eight hours by soaking the seed In brandy over night and planting it in sand lime. Ojie reader tried it. She soak ed the seed and planted it. according to directions. Then she watched for it to come up. The item said it would grow full-sized lettuce heads in forty eight hours, but, this didn't come up in that time. The season being so backward, and several attempts to persuade lettuce to come up in the garden having fail ed, the woman said she'd give it a lit tle more time. Twenty-four hours were passed and it hadn't come through the sand. The woman began to think she had been ftxiled. More she thought about it the farther she got from that serenity of temper which is so admirable in woman, and finally she threw the whole mess into the chicken yard. The chickens liked it. They thought a special feast had been prepared for them, and they greedily ate it until it had all disappeared, and then hud dled down in one corner of the yard to bask in the sun. But the sun had a had effect on them; they grew dizzy, and were unable to move about with out tumbling over each other. This was too much for the good woman, and that's how the Times came to hear of it. When it was explained to her that the chickens were not used to a brandy diet the receiver was hung up with a bang.—Burlington Free Press. Postmaster Bowen's Lost Fish. In the days when facilities for keep ing fish were not what they are now a fish cart stood in the street at Shel burne Fails, Mass., and Postmaster Bowen, stepped out and purchased a fish. As he could not leave his office to take the fish home, he looked at the men standing about and said: "Now, if I had some one to take it home for me." "I'll take it home for you," said a Mr. Merrill. "All right; thanks," and Mr. Mer rill and the fish started. When Postmaster Bowen went home to dinner he looked for fish, and as none came on he asked his wife if Mr. Merrill didn't bring a fish to the house. On getting a negative reply, he lost no time in making his way in to the Merrill house, and there, sure enough, his fish was steaming on the table, with the family just drawing up around it. Mr. Merrill treated him cordially, and invited him to take din ner, which he was quite willing to do. A Father Song. Must all thy songs be mother songs, My bonny baby boy? Do poets write no other songs. That father's name employ? Why. then. I'll right the monstrous wrong. Come, boy, and hear thy daddy's song. But first a toss high In the air. To hear his merry shout, And then a tickle here and there, To bring the dimples out. And then a romp upon the bed, O precious little tousle head. Now, then, wee barefoot boy, take care! Run swiftly o'er the floor. And father'll be a bruin bear, rowl and bite and paw! us. boy. what flimsy stuff! And Why. LUid's song is rag lime, sure enough. There, now of play we ve had our fill; Tis cuddle time. I know. (llow very bright hie eyes the still!) "Hush, baby mine, by-low!" Pome, come, you little rascal, you. Dad's had enough of peek-a-boo! Hush. hush, my boy. to sleep with thee! <1 wish his mammy'd come!) Thy father-'ll turn into a bee If longer h* Ah. well, to lull a child to rest A mother song perchance is best. — P. F. Camp In Boston Transcript. must hum, Fickleness of Woman. Gray—Hello, Smith, old boy! And so you are married, eh? Smith—That's what the parson told me. Gray—And of course, you are hap py? Smith—Well. I don't know about that. To tell the plain, unvarnished truth I'm just a little bit disap pointed. Gray—I'm sorry to hear that. What's the trouble? Smith—Well, you see, during the courtship stunt she used to tell me how strenuously she loved me. but we had no sooner got spliced than she gave up her $10 a week job as type writer thumper. That goes to show you how much you can hank on a woman's love.—Chicago News. Easily Explained. Captious Critic—O. come now, you don't mean to say seriously that is a portrait of Gen Sir Timothy Hotspur. VS, KCB? Photographer—Taken from life. "I can't understand that. I've seen Sir Timothy at the head of his brigade many a time, and he always had a fire eating expression which no one could forget; hut in the portrait he looks as meek as a lamb." "But. my dear sir. he wasn't at the head that picture." "Well. I've seen him alone, too, and his expression was just the same. He was alone when he came here, 1 sup pose?" "No, not exactly; his wife was with him."—Stray Stories. f his troops when he sat for President Caswell's Name. When Alexis Caswell was president of Brown university a student by the name of Betterly came to him one After conversing with him s of his visit day. moment upon the object the president asked him his name, and upon being toll, said Jovially: "Yout name would be better without th« last syllable, wouldn't it?" "Yes," replied the student with i laugh, "and wouldn't yours be as wel without the C?" LOST 72 POUNDS. to Was Fast Drift.ng Into the Fatal Stages of Kidney Sickness. Dr. Melvin M. Page, Page Optical Co., Erie, Pa., writes: "Taking too many iced drinks In New York In 1895 sent me home with a terrible attack of kidney trouble. I had acute congestion, sharp pain in the back, head aches and attacks of dizziness. My eyes gave out, and with the lan guor and sleep lessness of the disease upon m* I wasted from 194 to 122 poundB. At the time I started using Doan's Kid ney Pills an abscess was forming on my right kidney. The trouble was quickly checked, however, and the treatment cured me, so that I have been well since 1896 and weigh 188 pounds." Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y. For sale by all druggists. Price, 50 cents per box. a » <5> m w at Infant's Remarkable Escape. Whatever the reason, there Is no disputing that Infants live after mis haps which would have meant certain death to older folks. Whenever there Is a big accident which has involved great loss of life, one nearly always reads of the remarkable escape of many children. SALT RHEUM ON HANDS. Suffered Agony and Had to Wear -Another Bandages All the Tlmi Cure by Cuticura. Another cure by Cuticura is told of by Mrs. Caroline Cable, of Waupaca, Wls., in the following grateful let ter: "My husband suffered agony salt rheum on hlB hands, and I had to keep them bandaged all the time. We tried everything we could get, but nothing helped him until he used Cuti cura. One set of Cuticura Soap, Oint ment, and Pills cured him entirely, and his hands have been as smooth as possible ever since. I do hope this letter will be the means of helping some other sufferer." Deacon Blimber Wants to Know. "There's one thing I've sort o' wanted some one to tell me the rea son fer, quite a while back," said Dea con Blimber to the City Boarder, "and that is, why is the $6 a week the clerk up yender in the dry goods store gits called a salary, while the $20 a week the blacksmith gits down to the shop Is only jest wages?"—Browning's Mag azine. Important to Mothers. Examine carefully every bottle of C ASTORIA, a safe and eure remedy for lufants and children, and see that it Bears the Signature of Over 30 Years. The Kind You Have Always Bought. In Use Ft Gem Teas. Gem teas are London's latest craze About six weeks ago Lord Crofton in vited his friends to a "gem tea" at his house in Sloane street, and there have been lovely displays of old and new Jewels at other houses.—The Gen tlewoman. TEA Do you know good tea? Do you know bad tea? Do you know what we mean ? Do you know Schilling's Best? Knowledge Book, A. Schilling A nclsco. Write for Company, San Ki Mails by Sky-Rocket. Perhaps the most unusual way ol delivering mails is that adopted for one in the Pacific, where the danger of ap proachtng Inshore renders it nee-?* for the mall steamer to use a of the islands of the Tonga fyoup sary sky-rocket as a postman. Ask Your Dealer for Allen's Foot-Ess* A powder. It rests the feet. Cures Swollen, Sore, Hot, Callous, Aching. Sweating Feet and Ingrowing Nails. At ail Shoe stores, 25 cents. Accept Samplo mailed FREE. Address, Alleu S Olmsted, LeRoy, N. Y. Druggists and no substitute. "Mark Twain's" Drydock Definition. It is told of "Mark Twain" that dur ing a conversation with a young ladj of his acquaintance he had occasion to mention the word drydock. "What is a drydock, Mr. Clemens?" she ask ed. "A thirsty physician," replied the humorist. w I>T*pep*i* Torment«*! Me for Year*. I>r BftYld Kennedj iP«i irtu Rmaed] i ind nw." Mr» r 6 . Iknighertj , Mill villa, N. J. l'kèü 90 yean. II 00. Dove the Emblem of Love. The Russian name for "darling" is "my little dove;" and this same idea of a cuddling, meek, and cooing crea ture as love's delight runs through all oriental poetry. Again and again it recurs in the Song ot Solomon. Do It Now. If you are about to make a trip any where, let me know. Pleased to giv* you full information as to low rates— plenty of 'em this summer—train ser vice, etc. "The Santa Fe" trade mark is the sign of safety, speed and ease. C. F. WARREN, Genl. Agt., A. T. & S. F. Ry., Salt Lake City, Utah. English Tax on Bachelors. By an act of parliament in 1695, under William III., a tax was laid on all bachelors of twenty-five years Old and upward. DESK USED BY LAFAYETTE. Now Owned By Rendent of Mid dleboro, Mas*. A relic of the visit of Gen 1 -afayeUe to this country more than a century is to be found in the residence of Relic ago I-eonldas Deane. Oak street. Middle boro, Mass. He prizes It highly, It is a desk which was used by the genera! during his stay in America. Mrs. resident of San Juan, but Ellen V. The ancestors of Frost, now a who formerly lived In Mtddleboro. se cured this bit of antique furniture at Elizabeth. N. J., and it was kept in Then Mr. that family for 100 years. Deane secured the prize. When closed the desk forms a fine table, being substantially built of ma hogany and highly polished. W hen the Is folded back a fine writing sur cover face is exposed. By pressing a catch at the side of the desk swings open, and a person can step inside and sit. "he validity of the claim that it was « y v*v. ■J LAFAYETTE DESK. Closed, Making in possession of Lafayette was raised, but the investigations and assurances of the Frost family, who have looked the matter up, and who say that it is genuine, are accepted. Table. LEFT HENS ON NESTS. Firemen Used Old System Rather Than Disturb Them. There is a story of an old New Hampshire doctor who, on taking out a wagon that had not been used for some time, found that a hen was sit ting in it. He merely "harnessed up" without disturbing her, and he and biddy made a series of calls. Boston Herald offers this true story of the town of Amesbury, which owns a small fire apparatus: Outside the fire limits is a small community that, on petition, received an appropriation for the purchase of a "hand-tub." It was installed in an abandoned blacksmith shop, where It remained for two years, used only for decorative purposes in street parades. I^ast summer a stroke of lightning started a small fire in a farm house near by. The volunteer department rallied at once, but when they arrived at the engine house, the foreman stood at the door. "Don't touch her, boys!" cried he. "I've got two hens settin' in the box. Let's use the buckets." They agreed and the hens were al lowed to pursue their incubating ways. The Poet's Claim to Congratulation. A Paris youth named Armand Gaily killed his sweetheart and attempted to commit suicide. At his trial coun sel for the defense described the youth as a poet, and read a pathetic verse which he said he had written. The jury was touched and acquitted the prisoner. Now Viscount de Bor relli has written the papers: "Here is an exceedingly humorous business. One Armand Gaily kills a woman and tries to kill himself, but of course fails, as they always do. At the trial, counsel reads, as being the work of his client, a poem by myself, pub lished some three years ago in the Gaulois. And, of course, the jury ac quits him. It appears to me that I deserve to be congratulated in this matter." Pretty Idea for Fan. A pleasant, personal kind of fan Is owned by an Ingenious girl who cut beads, faces and bits of landscape from her photographic prints and pasted them harmoniously on a pretty bt t inexpensive fan. Her people, her intimate friends, her home, her favor ite sport, her pet cat and dog and oth er interesting things appear on this fan, each tiny print outlined with gilt watercolor paint. She has another fan upon which she has pasted tiny prints of her college class, outlining them with the college colors and tying ribbons of these colors on the handle. In Pacific Depths. Hülse 14 ■** 2 I - ' .«. . W:ä Vi ; . < • % AS« h} < ' -x • I ■ Wt.-.t Sunken in the Pacific ocean, the highest mountain In the world would appear as here shown with half a mile of water above It. Mails 50 Pounds of Tubers. John R. Dodnon, an Alaska miner, bought fifty pounds of potatoes and or dered them sent to Mastodon, Alaska, by U. S. mail. He paid $10.50 for the lot and for their carriage by mail into the Inte rior of the northern territory, which will make the "spuds" cost 21 cents a pound laid down at their destination. At that price he saved 14 cents a pound on the price In the markets there. You be the Judge try a can of three crown MG THE QUALITY BAKING POWDER It will cost you nothing If It isn't the "Best of the good ones." Hewlett Bros. Co. Insured Runaway Slaves. In 356 B. C., when Alexander the Great was emperor, the Greeks had a scheme of Insuring runaway slaves. TEA Moneyback says: what ever you buy Schilling's Best, your grocer returns your money if you don't like it. Write for Company, San Francisco. Knowledge Book, A. Schilling A Alderney Cows. There are certainly not a hundred cows approaching the pure Alderney breed In the entire island of Alderney, yet one dealer advertises that he an nually imports "from the island" up ward of one thousand cows. TEA The most significant word between you and your grocer is moneyback. Signifies fairness. Your grocer return! your money if you don't like Schilling'! Beit. Use for Child Elocutionist. "It is a great comfort to have a child about the house," said the man of domestic tastes. "Yes," answered the unfeeling wretch; "when company comes that you don't care for you can make it recite."—Exchange. TEA Almost nobody takes the money ; almost nobody wants the money. I money If you don'i Your grocer returns y >i like Schilling's Best. Where Dickens Found Inspiration. «U Barnard Castle, in Durham, Charles Dickens found the ground work of "Nicholas Nickleby." Here is Relief for Women. Mother Gray, a nurse in New York, dis* covered a pleasant herb rented v for women's Ills, called AUSTRALIAN -LÉ AF. It is the only certain monthly regulator. Cures female weaknesses, Backache, Kidney and Urinary troubles. At all Druggists or by mail 50 cts. Sample mailed FREE. Address, The Mother Gray Co., LeKoy, N. Y. Purest City Air. The purest air In cities is said to be that about twenty five feet above the street surface. TEA Americans drink the worst tea in the world. There is plenty of good here too. Yonr prrocer return« your money If you don't like Schilling! Best. Illiteracy in Scandinavia. Two men in a thousand In Sweden are Illiterate, three in Norway, and Denmark, seventy-eight In Russia, and 13.6 In F.ugland. TEA Tea is a dainty taste and a dainty feeling. Coffee is dainty too, but , another sort altogether. Your gr«>eer return! your money If you don't Uke Schilling'! best. Chinamen Laugh at Death. Chinamen have been known to ofTer themselves as substitutes for execu tion on the understanding that cer tain sums of money will be paid U. their families. TEA a Tea is cheaper than water, if tea is comfortable and water is not. In «Ter? pwkmra ot Sehimn*'i Bnl Tex le ft booklet: How to M»ke Good Tea. Dreary Outlook for the Man. Only a man who has married an in tellectual woman can appreciate the monotony of having brains for break fast 365 days in tbe year.—New Or leans Picayune.