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" I ' V'. X - M I I .WWW I'J DRIVING FROM DIIIVINC a horse is one of those sin, pie processes, like sailing a boat, which anyone can master without previous experience. Kvery body knows that there is nothing d illi cit It about it. and those that have never done it are perfectly aware of their ability to do it. if they choose. lint "driving from the back scat" is quite a different thin-; that is a grave and ser.Jci: affair, an undertaking of tragio in:'i:siy. There is not one mo ment of aim. peaceful enjoyment for those so employed. livery circumstance and incident to them is vital and mo mentous: ach turn in the road bids fair to be a certain pathway to destruction; every signboard is a false, deceitful snaie set to mislead them, while each movement of the horse is but an index of vieiou i ropensities about to be re vealed. Ii; fact, this method of driv ing is r,.M only physically exhausting, but mentally depressing and spiritu ally demoralizing, and not alone does the driver suffer, but also all who are unfortunate enough to rind themselves !n :ho san e vehicle with such a one. I'erhars a brief description of my own will bst serve to illustrate mv gesred that possibly I might enjoy a drive ovr to Pine Knoll, which they deemed a most, desirable point from which ro vi' w the country round about. I, of course, expressed myself delighted with the idea of a quiet country drive after the rush and turmoil of the city, trom which I had just escaped. Immediately after luncheon a light two-seatfd wagon drawn by a pair of spirited bays appeared at the door. Mrs. Grazier and I took our seats be hind and Mr. Crazier, springing into the seat in front, took the reins and we were whirled away down the long, smooth driveway, beneath rows of line old elms. I glanced admiringly at them as we p issed along and turned to my hostess enthusiastically. "What magni ficent trees -hese are." I ejaculated. Sli". however, failed to respond, ami I noticed that her lips were tightly compress-. careful, Willani. when you t;::a into the road." she sa!d warningly. and I perceived that we were approaching the picturesque Ftonc gap-way. over which much su perb Mug!. sii ivy was gracefully twin ing. "We're very proud of that ivy," Mr. Crazier remarked, eyeing it with satis faction. ; the bays turned smoothly out into the road. "It is beautiful." I murmured, trans ferring my attention to his wife, who was holding her breath and lirmly jjrasping her sale of the wagon. "Are yen timid about driving?" I ask c 3 . y m pa t he t i ca 1 ly . "Oil. no." she returned, "only my hus "baml absolutely disregards every sug gest:; n of mine," and she sighed deeply- "Indeed." I said, lowering my tone, so that it might reach her ears alone, while I eyed the bays uneasily, "and Isn't Mr. Crazier used to driving?" "II? ought to be," she responded, "for he has driven since he was a boy." I felt relieved, though still puzzled. "Put you are a great horsewoman your self, then." I persisted. She shrugged her shoulders. "Not in the least. I never touch the reins if I can help it." she concluded. At this point I became convinced that Mr. Crazier had very sharp ears, for. as I continued to regard her quest ion Ingly. he remarked lightly, "Mrs. Cra zier drives from the back seat." . I laughed with all the fervor of one who does not see the joke, wondering meanwhile what he could mean. Ile fore the afternoon was over, however. I understood his meaning perfectly. "Willard, here comes one of those dreadful coaches." his mentor began almost immediately. "lie sure that you turn out more than you did the other afternoon. I never saw a man take euch risks." In a few minutes one of the horses whisked his tail over oue of the reins, which was promptly freed by Mr. Cra zier; this gave his better half a chance to suggest that a tighter rein would have prevented the catastrophe. "Some one was telling me the other day, Wil lard," she went on. "that when a horse pets his tail over the reins no one knows what he may do; In fact, he Is just as likely t run away as not." A little later we reached the shore of a beautiful lake and I exclaimed I I. i.! r,n down to spend a couple of ! ' "C inh to go days with my friends the CrazieJ. who tl this steep 11; I can tell by the were o. spying a charming country P ir ears." , Place f,r the summer, on the after- . the sunnn.t we drew rein. Nota noon nf u,v nrril..,i - ..... 1,a1 vu'w "''. ' host announced. m- a (1 H?i p) - X'H -1 II I I J II THE BACK 3EÄT. with rapture over the glimpse of the verdant hills rising majestically upon the other side. "This is indeed an Ideal spot," 1 burst forth, but Mrs. Crazier had no eyes for the beauties of the landscape just then "Willard. what is the matter with the horse on this side? He looks st ra ngo." very "He's all right, my dear; only the flies bother him a little," nnd Mr. Crazier waved his whip lightly over the offend- king animal's head. "Willard. how ran you do that, when you know he is so nervous, unless," she added plaintively, -you really want him to run away and smash us up." "That's my idea, precisely," he an swered pleasantly, as we left the lake drive and began to climb a neighboring hill. During our ascent Mrs. Crazier fixed her attention upon the check reins. "It seems to me. Willard. that these horses are checked up unnecessarily tight; It Is nothing but that. I am sure, that makes them act so." "Hut they haven't acted so." her hus band remonstrated. "Well, they will I'm perfectly pns; pointing with his whip to the glorious picture spread out beneath us. "Now, Willard, you watch the horses and let us admire the view," Mrs. Crazier earnestly admonished, without eliciting any response from the occu pant of the front seat, who continue to point out to me special features in the surrounding landscape, despite her protest. We shortly began to descend the hill, which process I foresaw would permit my hostess ample opportunity to lend her ever ready assistance from the back seat, and I was quite right in my sur mises. It was "Willard. what a loose rein you have! Can't you realize that they're likely to stumble at any moment?" Or. "Willard. we're coming to one of those dangerous 'thank-you-ma'ams ,' do be careful." I sat by wondering at Mr. C raster's unrutlletl composure under the contin ual lire, but reflected that doubtless he was used to it. Next, we reached the crossroads, and Mr. Crazier turned the horses to the right, remarking: "Here we leave the main road for a drive through the Woods." "Oh. no, Willard. I'm sure you're mis taken." his wife declared, "we ought to keep to the main road for at least a mile more. I remember perfectly just how every inch of the road looked the last time I drove over it." "My dear. I am absolutely sure that this is the road." he replied, whipping up the horses. Mrs. Crazier leaned back in her seat with an expression of Intense resigna tion depicted upon her face. "Very well; take us anywhere you please, pro vided that you get us home finally. 1 shall not say another word; I have of fered all the advice that I intend to this afternoon." I heard this statement with much sat isfaction, feeling that advice was xiot, after all the necessary accompaniment of a thoroughly charming country drive. "This woody road is lovely, at all events, and so shady and cool," I put in timidly. "Yes. i tis very pretty here," Mrs. Crazier assented; then she added: "Wil lard, I see a farmer coming and I want you just to ask him if this is the right road." "Hut I know it is the road." "No matter, I should think you might ask him. if only to set my mind at rest." "I suppose it would rest it very much if he had said it was the wrong road." "There, that's why you won't Inquire; you know he'll say It's the wrong road." Inst then the farmer came alongside, and Mr. Crazier, who was apparently determined not to stop, suddenly drew rein, more abruptly, I fancied, than was wholly necessary, and my com panion on the back seat, after exclaim ing, 'How could you, Willard V eagerly addressed the farmer: "Is this the road to Pine Knoll?" "To Pine what?" he questioned, blankly. "Pine Knoll, a hill with trees on It?" she explained. "Wall, I can't say,' he responded. "I ain't much Acquainted up this way. but I reel ton you'll 2nd p'nes all about here." "Thank you." his interlocutor said briefly, and we drove on. "Now, we must stop and ask at the next farmhouse. Willard." my hostess. announced; "they certainly are ac quainted with the neighborhood." Tut how absurd, when I know that the knoll is not half a mile from this very farmhouse." "So you imagine. Willard. but I think differently. Here comes another man, and I am going to speak to him." Man number two. however, did not wait to be spoken to, but accosted u with a broad smile. "Cood day, Mr. Crazier, goin' up to the Knoll again?" Mr. Crazier nodded. "Is this the shortest road?" Mrs. Crazier Inquired promptly. "I reckon it's about the only one," he rejoined, grinning, as if he found the idea of a possible second road hugely amusiug. We drove on in silence for some few minutes before Mrs. Crazier spoke again; then she said. "Anyway, it's a relief to know that this is the road." I answered fervently, but Mr. Cra zier vouchsafed no reply. Pine Knoll proved to be a truly love ly spot, but my memory of the way thither and back is clouded by my too vivid recollection of my hostess' par ticipation in the management of the bays. If we crossed a bridge Willard was reminded of the sign which directed us to "walk the horses." If we passed a wagoner in a narrow part of the road he was conjured not to tip up down the steep embankment. If the horses quickened their pace, it was cruel to drive so fast, and if they slowed up they Avere overheated, or had, doubt less, stones in their feet. At every water-trough Mrs. Crazier felt sure that they were dying of thirst, until at last we stopped, and after much delay and a struggle to unhitch their checkreins we ascertained that neither of them could be Induced to touch a drop. The most trying time of all was prob ably when we turned around in a very limited space on top of I'ine Knoll, but upon that I will not enlarge. When we reached home I felt tired and exhausted, well nigh sick, while my hostess sighed deeply as she alight ed, declaring that she couldn't under stand why driving fatigued her so. Kven Mr. Crazier, despite his ada mantine nerves, appeared somewhat weary, as he replied: "It's not driving that tires you, but driving from the back seat. Mrs. Crazier." Since my country drive I have often observed people endowed with those characteristics so prominent in Mrs. Crazier. In every club, society or so cial gathering I have found them pres ent; in fact, wherever human beings strive or struggle, wherever they con gregato for work or for amusement, some are present who ever stand one side, their mission being to advise, di rect and criticise. They make them selves generally useful by telling others what they ought to do ami how to do it. And as often as it is my misfortune to run across them, and their name is legion. I regret to say. my painful coun try drive rises before me, and I mur mur: "I know you well, my friends; therefore I shun you. as I do all of your kind, who, like you. are driving from the back seat." P.oston Transcript. One Tor the- Dentists. A physical phenomenon was reported by telephone to the I'ress and Mail this morning, but inasmuch as the story sounds very much like a fake its accu racy will not be vouched for. It is or iginal, even if it is untrue, and there fore may prove interesting as a bit of romance. It was stated that Henry West fa II, the I'-year-oId son of Otto Westfall, residing at Kailroad street and Aslmry avenue (this thoroughfare does not cross according to the direc tory tiled this morning at (I o'clock. Ten days ago the infant suddenly be came unconscious. Previously it did not have a tooth in its head. Three hours before it expired it opened its mouth, which had Neen continuously closed, and much to the surprise of Dr. II. P. Clapp. the attending physician, its upper and lower jaws were decked with a full set of front and back teeth. not the ordinary molusks that favor infancy, but teeth that any adult might be proud of. According to the telephon ic correspondent the doctor was startled and could offer no explanation. lie said he would at once call the atten tion of the medical fraternity to the extraordinary occurrence and see if there had ever leen a similar ease. Dr. Clapp's name is not in the directory or telephone, and West fall's address is absent from the former volume. Chi cago Press and Mail. Solving a Problem. Italian workmen are, as a rule, not fond of strikes; they tisualy resort to other means to get what they want. A company of Italian navvies, engaged in the construction of a railway in Cer many, had their wages reduced. They said nothing, but during the night each of the nien cut an inch off the end of his shovel. In reply to the engineer who took them to task about it, ouP of them said: "Not so much pay, not lift so much earth. So much longer last work. Italian n fool like Ceruiau. Italian no strike." He "I don't think there is anything much liner than to have a beautiful yacht." She "I'm surprised at you. Haven't you considered a beautiful wife?" He "Oh, yes; but I mean on the ground of economy." Harper's Ha zar. He "Will you be my wife?" She "Oh, this Is such a surprise!" He "I can't help that It isn't my fault that you've never heard anything like It before." I Ifa. The Coming: Kocul Parliament. The road parliament to be held at Atlanta next month, and which will be coincident with the great exposition, will naturally attract the attention of the advocates and friends of good roads all over the country. The meet ing has the indorsement of the secre tary of agriculture, and to a certain ex tent is under his patronage. Invita tions have leen Issued to the street commissioners in all the larger cities, all transportation and express com panies, all agricultural colleges, all so cieties of civil engineers, and to many leagues of wheelmen. Whatever Is accomplished by the par liament will be largely due to the zeal and enthusiasm of the League of American Wheelmen, an organization that has done more than any other single agency to spread the gospel of good highways and to create a senti ment favorable to road improvement Invents of the last few years clearly in dicate that the bicycle and the moto cycle must ultimately solve the good road problem, if it is solved at all. The thing that has tended to embarrass the efforts of wheelmen to secure better roads has been the popular notion that the bicycle is purely a pastime, and that wheeling is eontined to the young fellows in the cities. On this account the farmer has not been disposed to take the wheelmen's interest in good roads seriously. He has never under stood just why he should be asked to build smooth thoroughfares for the pleasure of the city chaps who want to extend their trips outside the paved limits of the cities. lint in one year the bicycle has seen a rapid evolution from a mere pleasure vehicle to a utilitarian carriage. Thous ands of physicians, lawyers, merchants, teachers and bankers ride it. They all want good roads. Pretty soon the farmer will begin to ride it to town. This will put a new aspect on the good roads agitation. Then will come the motocycle. the horseless carriage which is bound to accelerate the good roads movement by affording additional ar guments for highways that are con structed on seieutitie principles and are therefore passable at all times of the year. Chicago Times-Herald. Chinks Can't Co to School. Sam Lung, with his Chinese wife and two boys, came from San Francisco and opened a laundry at Franklin and Kent streets, P.rooklyn. He did well, and being of a progressive turn of mind, wanted his children raised as American children are. He determin ed to send his two boys. Ah and Wah. to public school No. on .lava street, presided over by Principal S. 1',. Ilanna fonl. Ah is 12 years and Wah 14 years of age. They are both unusually bright boys, and outside of the almond eyes and sallow complexions, would not be t.ken to be of Chinese extraction. Out of all the children returning to school al ter vacation Ah and Wall were probably the only Chinese. The advent of the two celestials was the cause of much comment arid very little rejoio- ing. They were ostracised. At noon j hour none ol the boys would talk to them. Instead of the usual playing there were knots of excited youths, ad dressed by ward leaders in embryo. The advent of the Chinese was de nounced in unmeasured terms, and it was decided that they must go. It was at the closing of the day tnat serious trouble commenced. Will Scott, one of the pupils of the primary department, deputed to speak for the others, said: "If you ever come to school again we will give you a worse licking that the .Taps gave you." When a block away from the schl on Java street the brothers were as saulted with a shower of stones, and Policeman Davis, of tue Creeu point aeuue precinct, came to their assist ance and saw them home. New York World. Where Nothing Is True. It is not only with regard to litera ture that excessive strictness of the censorship lias a disastrous effect. In Itussia It is impossible to believe what one reads, for everything bears the im press of falsity. Statistics, published by supreme order, are falsified and no one knows what is going on in the coun try, whether the cholera is raging or the peasants are famine stricken, con sequently the people suffer indirectly for want of relief during famine, while the cholera may be spread broadcast over the land. Fr instance, in the present year the writer visited Nlju! Novgorod at the time of the great fair there, and found that the cholera was raging there, and had been for some time. Notwithstanding this, the Oov ernment published no statistics of chol era In Nljnl. but gave the town a clean bill of health at the risk of spreading the disease all over European Ktissla and Asia, and with the benevolent ob ject In view of not Interrupting the business of the market. Thus all this secrecy causes material harm. Distress and famine, existing in outlying districts, are kept secret, and the wretched peasants perish for want of that assistance which thaj would receive frcm charitable people If thel? requirements were made known. Further, no comments are allowed to be printed on the actions of civil or military officers, police, or any govern ment otlicials. and there is. consequent ly, little to prevent them abusing their power, a privilege of which they fre quently avail themselves. Such being tiie case, and the Itussians being an Asiatic nation in many of their char acteristics, it is not surprising that the administration of the country is cor rupt to the core. Temple Par. One on the Clerk. "We can let you have the bridal chamber," ventured the genial clerk, as he rubbed his hands and looked con üdentially across the register at the youngish couple. "That is very kind of you," replied the young man. as he drew a nervous flourish beneath the abbreviation "and wife" and laid down the pen; "but we contemplate remaining ten days or so, and you might need the room." "You shall not be disturbed. I assure you," continued the clerk, "and the apartment is a lovely one." "Airy?" asked the young man. "As to that," and a gleam of in tense pride surmounted the clerk's face, "I will say that the room contains seven windows, all opening upon tiuv veran das." The young couple looked at each other. Then the young woman spoke. "I don't think we shall care for that room. You see. our three children will be here with their nurse in the morn ing. They can all climb like goats, and I'm sure they would be falling off those verandas inside of fifteen min utes." "Front." murmured the clerk in a voice that betrayed deep emotion, "show this gentleman and his lady up to the sky floor, and then have the maid put the nursery in order." Truth. Smoke Is Valuable. The recovery of minerals that other wise would pass away in smoke and fumes is now said to be both practical and profitable including gold, silver and lead by means of an instrument, tested, it appears, at some of the most important smelting establishments in the western country, and has the in dorsement of eminent metallurgists. The apparatus consists, as explained, of a horizontal flue, some 1.000 feet long, exposing a surface for radiation and condensation of the heated gases of upward of ÖI.(hm) square feet; through this Hue the 1 times are drawn by means of a fan. the outer circum ference of which, at full speed, revolves with a velocity of nearly two milVs a minute. The fumes thus under pres sure are forced into a spacious build ing, from which there is no means of escape except through a filter of tex tile fabric, the colorless gases passing through into a stack beyond, while the valuable soot, or smoke condenses on the inner or lower side; from here it is collected from time to time, compressed into molds, and fed back again into the furnaces, where the valuable metals are duly extracted and separated, not one particle of valuable fume, it is de clared, escaping under this arrange ment. New York Sun. Iiutler's Quickness of Wit. In one of Ceil. P.enjatnin F. P.mler's political campaigns he was to speak ii a hall which had a small aperture over the speaker's desk. Some of the younger and dare-devil element secret ed themselves in the loft from which the hole opened, and at an impressive mo ment in the (leneral's speech a huge wooden spoon suspended by a cord was seen descending slowly from the ceil ing T!h effect upon the andienet was instantaneous, and amid roars of laugh ter, in which even the dignified occu pants of the platform could not help joining, the spoon pursued its down ward course, halting only when direct ly opposite the speaker's face. Mr. Unt ier gazed calmly at the cause of the merriment. Then. "Hello! There's one I didn't get," and. pocketing the prize, he resumed his address. Posten Iiudget Printing in Ancient Home. According to a Roumanian newspaper tl e "Foia Diecesana," Adrian Diaconu. an architect and ;:ivh .! gist, has found in the rums of the ancient Ho rnau fortress at P.ersovia. n-ar Temes var documents i)ovii:g that the credit foi tee invention o' printing is lue to the Kornaus. From the res..ir. 'i ;s of Mr. Diaconu it w-uh' seem that tlu Fourth Legion. Flavia Felix, which was stationed in the flourishing province of Dacia Itipensis. was familiar with the use of typography, with movable types. Two members of the Pucharest Seieu titie Academy have examined the dis cover' of Mr. Diaconu and admitted its value. Queer Way or Living. A queer trade is followed by half a dozen sidewalk merchants outside the Philadelphia house of correction. Ev ery person discharged from the institu tion receives on leaving a pair of new shoes. Tinders lie in wait for the dis charged prisoners and offer them a pair of old and comfortable shoes and 2T and 7 cents for their new pair. In a great majority of cases the trade is made. The house of correction shoes are well made and strong, and the traders get a good price for them from worklngmen. Indianapolis Journal. 'l love you passionately Maud be mine." "I cannot, Cerald. I always said I would marry a brunette, and you are a pronounced blonde." "That will enable me to prove what I have so often told you. 1 will dye for your sake." Harper's Pazar. Nellie Look at those pretty cows. Maud They are not cows; they are calves. Nellie Put what is the differ ence? Maud Why, cows give milk and calves give Jelly. Pittsburg Chroulcle. A PHANTOM ENGINE. The XVcirtl Experience of a Kaiirol l'ingi necr. "Did you ever hear of a phanor.i locomotive;" inquired one of the oil time Union Pacitic engineers of a num ber of his associates who were relating their experience and hairbreadth es- j capes. All the 111.11. who have grown I gray at the throttle, admitted this was j a new one on them, and the old timer 1 -V -X.--vV.l .v.l . j oi yjy. ri'ui'U . "Pack in the 70s the Union Pacific ran an engine called the 'pusher' on the west side of Sherman hill to assist thj trains up between Laramie and tii summit. After helping a train up thi hill the engine would be run back to Laramie. "I was in charge of an engine pulling the regular passenger up the hill one gray morning. Just as we neared th snow shed that used to stand at Har ney siding an engine suddenly popped out in front of us. liefere I had tim to even get a square look at her she disappeared in the shed and was lost to view. The whole thing happened s suddenly that I was dumfounded. but I was positive I had seen an engine, and so was my fireman. I at once shut off, and the train came to a standstill. The conductor came over and asked what was the matter. Pill,' said I, I just saw an engine pop out of that snowshed and just as suddenly disap pear again.' "'Are you positive?' said the knight of the punch, and he peered up the track, and I asserted I was. 'We had better move on anyhow, and if you see one it will probably keep out of our way.' So we proceeded up the hill, keep ing careful watch for the mysterious engine which made my heart jump In to my throat as she merged from the snowshed. The siding was reached, but there was no sign of an engine throating us with a head-end collision. The train men laughed at me. and said I must have seen a spirit. Had it not leon for the fact that my tireman sided with me, I don't know but that I should have given up and adnuttel I was mistaken. "A careful watch failed to reveal any sign of the stray engine, and when w- stopped at Sherman all the train r.ien had a hearty laugh at my expense. Put I was still positive and insisted on mak ing a hunt, and ve found an eng'ne hid away in the 3 trie roundhouse lo cated at that point. "The engineer was a man named .Jor dan. He had overlooked a new time card and had started to take his engine back to Laramie after helping a freight up to the summ't. He could ee the headlight of one j;g,i 1-efore he emerged from the sir,w.-hed. This ac counted for hi-, siiddei disappearance. His engine was almost stopped when he came out, and it did not take hin: long to get to going back 1;; the iiiil again at a lively rat The engineer thought we did not oe iiim. and he would jus hide in th, roundhouse at Sherman, and no one would be the wiser for his little es mi a de. "We did not report h;:u. but the ciais learned of the incident in ronio :nanner, and his head went in 10 the basket." San Francise i.'all. Physical Evolution of a Race. There are indications that the Ameri can woman is gradually growing taller and larger. A few years ago the aver age skirt length taken in the fashiona ble dressmaking establishments was 42 inches, and -i'2 inches was the length used for all the model gowns sent over here from Paris. The model length has now increased to -IÖ inches and the in crease in other m 'asuiciiicnts is in pro portion. The middle-aged American woman shows an inclination to grow broader across the hips and shoulders and stouter through the arms; but the college graduate, the university woman and the debutante grow more graceful ly vigorous every year. The typical college graduate is from two to four inches longer I mm the waist down than formerly. Her waist is getting longer, her cliest fuller ami her limbs narrow er. The middle-aged woman grow corpulent and clumsy through indolence and indulgent habits of life, while the ever increasing tendency toward ath letic sports and outdoor exercises is im proving the younger of the sex. The statuesque .Inno type may yet express the American woman. Chicago News. A Hereditary Postofllce. The otlico of postmaster of Vienna, the capital of the Austrian empire, was created by I-mi press Maria Theresa over a hundred years ago. and has since remained hereditary and salable-a queer institution in our time and day. although no queerer than the hereditary succession of monarchs. The postmas ter of Vienna has to furnish all th vehicles necessary for the service, and the drivers thereof are in his personal employ. At present he employs ."10 drivers, blacksmiths, etc.. ami ;Ud horses are under his whip. Jumbo Wheels. In Western Kansas and other cyclone regions of the West they an- utilizing their inconveniences in a characteris tic American way. Py the use of t'.Iumbo wheels," something like the Ferris wheel at the World's Fair, or like the paddle-wheel of a stern-wheel steamboat, they get UM) horse power out of a l.Vniile wind. This force they are using for irrigating purposes, and there are those who think that the .lumbo wheel has such a future that it is likely to make farming profitable iu 4io whole arid region. At Sea. A new Invention has been designed to prevent collisions at sea. At a recent test the force from electro-maguetlo colls stationed on board a vessel suc cessfully influenced a chemically pre pared compass stationed some six mile away, causing It to set up an luslanta Beous peal of bells.