Newspaper Page Text
BIG ENGINES OF WAR ODoan'l Reeled cure con-tlpatloti without (rip Professional in Amateur Production. Inn nauioa nor any weakening eflVrt Al ynnr droMlit (or thorn 33 cento per boi. Tor ome reason n girl alv a CilnJ-H evcrv fellow who propones 1 ir H a hero. HOW 13-INCH QUN8 OF OATTI.E. 8HIP8 ARE HANDLED. h-t- lY- 3 .. h m it A ft rtr i a A ?. l- k k Where yon When yon No smoke Often you in some PERFECTION Oil Heater (Equipped with Smokeless Device) lo the room you wanl lo heat suilablc for any room in lite house. Il has a real smokeless device absolutely preventing smoke or smell lurn the as low as you like brass Jonl holds 4 quads ol oil ihat oives out alowinri heal for 9 hours. Fin- ished in japan and anywhere. Every The 'jRjJLamp ilia limn lar tm thijMi! ftf i f. t If . .i..iM 1:.L radix, il giTw a oiuum, iio( uym iHat miVti stuJy pleasure. MU oi krais. nickel with the Islesl Improved central aria ourna-. ins imcii impmTc raiu v...... ... ,-., -....-. . yoq caruwt oitiln Ut Perfection OJ Healer or Ray Larap lr dealer ritt It our nearest ejencT tor descriptive circular. HTlNUAIin OIL COMPANV 11 ysur nmiiwiutu ly First Exptriinct with Dan Cupid By Elalo Ohaetaln. She was bwcpI. susceptible 1G. Ho was ono over whom 18 summers had lightly passed, leaving his hair un tlnged -with gray, and the Bray matter undorneatli tho wavy crop unhard oned. Dut to hor ho was all that was wise, noble and desirable; und to him she waa perfection. In truth, It had bona a cane of love at first sight. ' They had llrat met at a party. 8bo had worn whlto. Ho wan partial to white. Her sunny hair had beon ar ranged loosely on her graceful nock. Ho neTor had liked girls who did their hair hlch. In fact, alio bad beon wholly, seductively charming, and he j had succumbed to those charms. He had worn tho regulation black suit, of course! Hut, ah! how broad hla shoulders wero; how merry his eyes. A strange, incomprehensible, ecstatlo emotion had taken possession at her soul. Ho had asked to tako her homo, but flho had not thought best "May X calir he had asked. 8ho had loll the hot blood leap to hor cheeks. If sho only dared say "yes!" But no; thcro was mamma to consider. Mamma, who was bo aw-1 fully, uncompromisingly sot on tho . proprieties. Mammu, who thought her ! far too young to have masculine ad-1 xatrers. And to have one call! Ohl A ', shiver ran down her Bplnal column. The young mun, waiting for an an swer, divined her thoughts. "Perhaps your mother would ob ject r ho had suggested, and with sad ' conviction she had anawered: "Yea she would." "But I must see you sonio tlnie,". ho , had insisted. Dear Insistence! She had thought for a moment, then: "Mamma la going calling to-morrow afternoon and I can meet you down tho river, right behind Blake's green houses, at three o'clock. Will that doT He had been enraptured with tho plan, and tho following day they met as they had agreed. J He suggested a boat ride. She ac quiesced, and ho rented Mr. Blake's boat. Ho osulsLed her to a seat, then took his place at tho oars. Something was wrong about his way of handling them, and tho boat refused to move. "Don't you know how to row?" aha ventured, after wme moments of fran tic rod-faced, but vain endeavors on his part. "Well, I or never did before," ho replied, then blurted out: "Can youT" "Why, yes," alio said. "Suppoeo you do, then." Thoy changed places and she rowed him up and down the river until her tender hands wore blistered and her heart wbb sore. She was woefully disap pointed ,l him. Never before had she met a man who could n6t row. But he talked entertainingly, and she forgave him. True love overlooks many Im perfections. After that aftornoon thoy met fre quently. Sympathetic young friends discovered bow the land lay, and came gallantly to tho roscuo, as young friends will do at all times. Ono evening she retired to. her room early, telling hor mother that she must study. Not bo. however. She had, Inutead, promised him to tako a moonlight stroll. Her window was not far from tho ground, and with the aid cf a loreoraained cracker box sue man "M to esonno fi'"' the bouse. l'luully they parted, and sno crept stealthily around tlw house. As Bha ueared the pailoj window she heard sounds of merriment. She peored in. A peculiar scene revealed ltsolf lo hor vlow. There sat her usually dlgnltlod mother, laughing until the tears ran down her cheeks. On his knees be foie her, with clasped hands and a ridiculously sentimental expression n.rtu.t ,iwar hiu -ntf n" freckle want it want II no smell no (ronblc. wanl heal in a hurry rcom in the house ihc fur nace (Iocs nol reach. It's so easy lo pick up and carry a wick as high as you can or nickel an omamenl healer warranted. Iatt4 and equipped bTorw. was her smult brother Ho was speak ing, declaiming, and as tho sister rea lized the Import of his words she turned cold with dread. "O-oo-oo, Celeste, darling, nngel, listen to me! I lovu you I I lovo you! Promise me that you will be mlno! Oh, dooo-oo! Leave your cruel mother, your happy home, nd Oy-yy with mo! l.lfo won't bo noth..r without you-oo. My heart is breaking. Ouch-ch-ch!" Waiting to hear no more, realizing that her secret was discovered, the young victim of unsympathetic kin made for her room with all possible speed, hoping to get there before tho "cruel mother" should decide to visit It. She had just mounted the cracker box and was cautiously raising hor head over tho sill when tho door opened and mamma, not laughing now, but stern and white, made her appear ance, louring In her hand a lamp, whoso rays fell directly on the horror Btricken faco at tho window. There was a moment's awful silence, then mamma set down the lamp and came to tho window. "Allow mo to assist you, Celeste," she said in'tones of ominous quiet. Celesto allowed her, and then But I will not attompUto describe what followed. Somo things aro hot ter left to tho Imagination. And, bo BldeB, you 6ee, my 'dears, I was Ce leste. Think it Over. Does tho man with a silk hat al ways wear silk underwear T r'ttrnccutlon. Vi r c ciiiioi Is not wrong because it cruel, but cruel because it Is wrong. Wl utely. Triumpn or roam. A certain line of exercises is recom mended to make children stronger than their parents. This looks like a blow at tho woodshed-ceremony. tie Got thu Money. A oung man, whoso father had no' answered his three lust applications for money, recently tolegraphod an follows: "Uavo died of sttrvution Please send cash to defray (unoral Tponsea." Various Species of Mammals. About 2,500 different kl d of aul mala aro known on earth that Is, warm-blooded, mllk-glvlng creatures, like our common domestic animals To avoid confusion with other crea lures, one ought to call them mam mals, meaning mllk-glvlng animals. Meed Not Tnat Call. It is a terrible error to supposa that becauso you relish "Wordsworth's Eolemn-tboushtcd idyl, or Tennyson's enchanted reverie," therefore you have a call to run off to write bad verso at tho lakes or the Islo of Wight I beseech you not all to turn to authorship. John Morley. ' No Law Aflalnst Rldlculouen. Certainly, Eustace, you may wear a strlpsd suit with wedge-shaped pock ets, and low shoes with bucklea on tham, and a bat tl -t turns up In front and down In tb back, and carry a swagger stick with ribbon tied to It, if you want to. Tho city comptrol ler has lookod up tho question and finds tboi Is no law against It. The public la therefore quite helpless In tho matter. Kansas City 8tar. The Happiest Children. The happiest children are those who bavo hayi y mothers. Tho young life which grows up In the shadow of a dis contented, iwptnlim aud aloo.ny moth er Is llkd a plant unwateiud by kind ly dews. It Is apt lo be dwarfed .iicl stunted. Even whun tilings ure crooked and Ionizations to be harsh come, lot the mother, for her sous' and daughter!.' uako, try to bo happy. OA TOXIIA. U&rttU Sijutwe f Tlw Kui toil Hart Always wtgM Gut? &!4 Every Member of Crew Has Certain Duties to Perform When In Ac tion Firing Done with Aid of Range-Finder. Washington. If a visitor woro to go aboard ono of our modem War ships ono of tho ilrst things he would ask to seo, probably, would be tho big guns. Should the visitor request, an over willing bluejaoket would gratify tho visitor's wish. But tho visitor Is not conscious that ho is an object of much amuscmont to tho man-o'-war'B men. There aro things to bo scon that tho avorago civilian nevor dreams of, and hla amazed glances when thoso aro point ed out to him causo tho lips of tho gunner to run up a smllo. Suppose you wish to see one of tho big guns. You ask tho nearest gun ner. Ho doffs his cap and asks you politoly to excuse him for a moment while ho obtains permission to show you into tho turret whoro tho big gun Is mounted. This permission ho gets from tho officer of the deck. He returns quickly and asks you to follow him. The only entranco to this turret from tho main deck is through a. manhole If you aro portly, the chances are thnt you'll not seo tho gun aftor all, for these steel manholes weren't designed for fat persons. But, taking it for granted that you aro thin, you finally find yourself in side tho armored walla. You turn about expectantly and aro face to face with tho death-dealing Implements. Thcro tboy stand, silent and grim, twin engines of destruction, peaceful enough lu repose, but terrlbla when manned by their human masters. The members of a gun's crew aro numbered and each man must not only know his own duty, but also that of tho others, as they may bo called on at any moment for a change of po sition. For Instance, No. 1, operating tho breech plug of tho gun, Is command ed by the officer in charge, "No. 1 and No. 5 change." No. 1 must know No. 5's duties, and No. 5 those of No. 1. This is done so that if while In ac tion a man Is killed or fatally wound- n,i tsyvmiVymvAYuy uiuws Breech Plug of 13-Inch Gun. od, another of the crow will be able to take his place. After the crow are all at their sta tions and mustered, the- magazines and shell-rooms are opened. Tho order: "Stand by," is given, thi being a preparatory command for go ing into action. The next order comes llko the crack of a rlflo: "Load!" The instant this command leaves tho lips 'Of the -turret officer, the .in terior of the handling-room resembles tho climax of a football game, and to a novice perhaps would appear llko confusion. But It is far from It. Every man has a certain thing to do, and ho does it. Before you can realize it, COO pounds of powder and a tou of steel have shot upward to tho guns, roady to re ceive it Tho trays containing tho shells and powder come up to tho breech of the gun. An electric ram mer drives the projectile home, re coils, and In tho same manner forces tho powder in. Tho powder charge for a 13-inch gun is Incased in four linen bags, the last bag that goes into tho gun contain ing tho Ignition charge, which Is In Its base. The main charge, however, consists of brown piismatic powder, which has the appearance of stick candy, as It has small boles running through it, and about an Inch In length. Tho black, or common powder, Is used for an ig' nltion charge, because It tgnttes quick' er than any other If flriug begins at 5,000 yards, th officer at tho range-finder calls out: "Five thousanayards is the range. Be gin firing." It It were posslblo for a visitor to bo Inside the turret when one or both guns aro fired he would be moro sur prised thau oinr, for the concussion Is something fearful. Tho men use cot ton In tholr ears to protect the drum from Injury, A most beautiful sight is the clear and distinct flight of a 13-inch shell. As the gun la elevated more or less, the shell describes nearly a half cir cle, finally plunging through the tar got and throwing u volume of water upward a hundred feoL At last, by bursting Into small pieces It dis appears. It Is claimed by exports that 8-lnoh, 10-lnch and 12-Inch guns are more ef fective, but the 13-lnch are still mount d. The Indiana carried 13-luch guns and used them with good effect at Santiago. Tho Illinois, one of our com paratively new blips, also is fitted with a 13-luch mala battery I tolling, bleeding, proirndlnft r blind pile yield to Donn'e Ointment Chrnnlr rnni ftoon rello?e1, Anally wired. l)ruiis alt tell It NoilrerJ T"ii3? 1 m ' rl 1 ; ' 11 r tinv It DyipinilaU Aillcrlro'a cur--c Burdock Wood Hitter conquers dynpejrtla e-. cry time It ilrivct out impurills. tonei the ttoinach. restores per fi-rt dlnewlon, nf mul weight and xood health I . 1 J 1,0 1 Josh Wise. "I.ik . ,i v" ' v ,aw a bono whnn he ain't I lugiy, a naggln' man will nng when he ain't angty." Curei baby' Croup, Wlllle'a dally cuu and brultei, mama'a sore throat, grandma's lameness -Dr. Thomas' Kloctrle Oil the great household remedy. Fools ar.d Wlss Men. Fotilti will ask wnht time it is, bu' 'ho v. No knew their time. From th 3aniKh. For cuts, sprains, bruises, burns rhouinntic mid all other pains, use McLean's Volcanic Oil Llnament. First sold In 1852, still the satno ef fective remedy in 1008. Good for men nr beast. 25c. Mo and $1 00. Two Kinds of Men. it's a wise man who knows how to bo rich and not give offense He's a patient citizen who can bo poor and not grumble. Manchester Union. To quickly check a cold, druggist are dispensing overywhere, a clever Candy Cold Cure Tablets called Proven tlcea are also flue or fever ish children. Take Preventlces at tho sneezo HtftRe, to Head oil all cold. Box of 48 2Gc. Sold by St. Bernard Mining Co., Incorporated, drug company. Advice. "Never mnrry a man to reform him, my dear," counseled Aunt Hophztuah "If you do reform him he'll hate you for it, and if you don't you'll always be pitying yourself for having married a man who wasn't good enough for you " A pain prescription is printed up on each 25o. bos of Dr. Snoop's rink Paul Pablets Ask your Doctor or Druggists if this formula is not com plete. Head paiuB, womanly pains pains anywhere got Instant relief from a Pink Pain Tablet. Sold by St. Bernard Mining Co., I .corporatetl, drug department. r Improbable Clerical Innovations. The Massachusetts bishop who has ordered collections In a Worcester church to be taken by the cash regis ter system evidently Is not afraid that this buBlness-Uke Innovation will lead to others, such as trading stumps, bar gain days and "satisfaction guaran teed or money refunded." Had a Close Call. Mrs. Ida L. Croom, tho widely known proprietor of the Croom Ho tel, Vaughn, Allss.. says For sev eral months I Bullerod with a se vere cough, and consumption seem ed to havo Its grip on me, when a friend recommended Dr. King's New Discovory. I began taking It, and three bottled allectod a com plete cure." The fame of this sav ing cough ami cold remedy, and Imig aud throat healer Ib world Wide. Sold at all leading druggists 50o. aud $1.00. Trial bottle tree. The New Morality. So, it's away with your old morality aud your prating about duty, self-restraint, sin and its punishment "Science" or "evolution," as the case may be, has shown that to be strong Is tn be virtuous, that to seize Is the aim of life and to let go one's hold the su preme transgression. N. Y. Evening Post. Tho wholesome, harmless groon leaves and tender stems of a lung healing mountainous shrub, give to Dr ahoop's Cough romedy Its cura tive properties. Tlokllng or dry imnonlai coughs quickly and safely vlrtld to this Highly eileotlve Cough urvloltio. Dr. Slioop assures moth ers tliHt they can Hftfety cive it to even very yotiug babes. No opinion nn chloroform absolutely nothing mM or harmful. It, calms the tils ti easing cough, and heals the sensi tive uietnbraueB. Accept no othor. Demand Dr. Snoop. Sold by St. Bernard Mining Co., Ii.oorporated, drug company. Taklny 'di-nntsge. An At fit' tou man ,viti a fe 'Ii-luk i the ImJ '"'' into a stre the i'ter lay and iiio-l t.i ihcw cf adj lerU illilii i ('! i 'hiug to him ti! be .tra nil 'tut 11 him -tuft h had t itWti a . viir--AUhlMu Ulobe. Where Bullets flew. David Parker, of Fayette, N. Y.. a veteran of the civil war, who lost a foot at Gettysburg, savs: "The Kod Eleotrlo Bitters have done Is worth more than live hundred del lara to me. I spout muob mouey doctoring for a bad case of b to mac It trouble, to little purpose. I then tried Eleotrlo Bitters, and they our ect me. I now take them as a tonlo and thev keep me strong and well." fiOo. at all leading druggists. aViiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinHHwiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii lJhShH) iiViiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiHlHiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiHiLi "Mr. Frederick E. Haiifl, who will Foster Brother," at Muiton ThMt'v, uuler the auspices tho Daughters of Confederacy, Ocnihor 1) k Mr. E. B. Taylor, who will assuine the role of "Geo. Gardnier," of Queensland, in a uew play, under the auspices of the Daughters of Oonfederacy, to be staged at Mortou Theatre, October 9th. rHE SAFEST AND QUICKEST WAY TO TRANSFER MONEY IS LOHG DISTANCE TELEPHONE FOR RATES APPLY TO LOCAL MANAGER CUMBERLAND TELEPHONE ft TELEGRAPH GO MCORPOIITt Eastern Vanity. In addition to treachery and a cer tain Innate love of cruelty, the ori ental nature, as present In the ruling classes, Is apt to be aupoi abundantly endowed with a sense of hs own Im portance, as Is manifested In the or nate, elaborate and high-suuudlus titles assumed by custom potentates Sorved as colleo, the new collee substltuce known to grocer's overy where as Dr. Snoops Health Colleo, will trick evon a collee expert. Not a gralnol roal Con"oe,iti it elther.Puro healthtul toasted grains, malt, nuts, etc. have been so cleverly blended astotdvea wonderfully satisfying collee taste and flavor And It is "mado lu a minute." tool No tedi ous 20 to 80 mlnuotB boiling. Test it and see. Dr. Snoop creatod Health Collee that the pooplo might 'have a genuine colleo suhstltutcaiid tue that would be thoroughly satis fying lil overy possible respeot. Sold by J. F. DeVylder, - Tlmsly Text. "Don't fool with Satan." n b an old tlmo brother, "unlaen jnn'ri a good hand at fighting arc, utiJ even tbfn jou'ro likely to pln a losing guue Bust thing to do is to krep tun inllou ahead of Satan If you can!" A Man's First Care. A man's first care should bo to avoid the reproaches of his own heart; hlB next, to escape the censuies of the world. If tho last Interferes with the former, it ought to be entirely neg lected; but otherwise there cannot be a groater satisfaction to an honest mind, than to see those approbations which It givos Itself sooonded by tho applauses of tho publla- Joseph Addison be seen in the title role of "The BY Novel Use for Gum. Help for tho small child! If money, ring or any small article Is dropped In a crack of sidewalk which cannot La reached by hand, chew a picco of chowing gum and take a long stick and paste the gum on the end. Push the stick down Into the crack and the ring or money can easily bo drawn out. If You Pear a Felon. When you first feel a sensation ot paiq In tho lingers that may mean a Won, at onco put rock salt lu the oven, pulverize It and mix with equal parts of turpentine. This mlxturo ap plied frequently will destioy within 24 hours oven a felon that has made some headway Depths of North Atlantic. Tho greatest depth determined by the Chnlleuger soundings, which was that ot a limited depresjlon about ft hundred miles to tho north of St Thomas, was 3,675 fathoms, or about ",4 miles. Excopt In tho neighbor hood of its coast lines, and In certain shoal areas, the floor cf tho AtlantlQ basin at its widest point seems to lt at a dopth of from 2,000 to 3,000 fath oms, its slopes being oxtromoly gnnU al. Nw York Ainorloau, Retort Uncourteout. After a protracted sitting an English town council was desirous ot adjourn lug for luuuh Tho proposition was opposed by the mayor At last an il literate member got up and exclaimed: "I bam astonished, I ham smptlsed. 1 ham amazed, Mr. Mayor, that you wtll not let us go to lunch" "I'm sur prised," exclaimed one of his col leagues, "that a geniWnua who lias got so muob 'ham' lu his mouth wauU any lunch at all"