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v "i, r i 1 ' n i) V 1 ' -4 I I. 1 ADVERTISE IN THE BUGLE Har you get enny think to sell or. swap? Do you want to buy enny think? THEN TRY A AD WITH US. Biggest and only newspaper in this end of th Co, Advertising rites famished with great cheer. SlrCulashlon books open to nobuddy. YOULL HAFT TO TAKE OUR WORD FOR IT f C IH w- to j m pi 1 ci pj to puSSS? AT i? . - . : T Yl ' Jvl itWIWS , ST0 Vt Ac A1 ortof li in i- "I THE BINGVILLE BDGLE The Leading Paper of the County Bright, Breezy, Bellicose, Bustling How doth the busr little twe ImproTs each cblnln boar By gathering honey, all the 'day From eTery opening Ooar. The cheapest adTertlslng medlom ta the County. If yon believe In advertising come and aee na. For further Information call ea or addresa the editor. EDDYTORIUI, Goodness grachious, here we've went and forgot to write a eddytor iul about George Washington's birthday and now George's birth day has went and got past us and is a part & parcel of the great be yond which can newer be recalled, but has went en goned f orewer ! We calkilate we ort to say some- think about G. Washington's birth day in this ishue of the Buggle even if it is gone by, being as there is a hole lot of truth in that motto, "It io better newer than late," so here goes. (However, our remarks win be breef.) t G. Washington was a great man he wa one of the greatest men which ever lived in his day or has sinst for that matter he was a greater man than Bingville has ewer perdooced he was a bigger man than Cy Hoskins is even (even if Cy has got money in the bank & is one of the biggest property own ers in Bingville and a Deacon & Piller in the Bingville church),' and if Cy desires to take excepshions to this statement when he reads these lines and says that he thinks he his self is a greater man than G. Wash ington and gits mad at us and comes to this offis and stops his Buggle we don't keer so long as Cy pays up his subsenpshions when he stops becuz we would a blamed sight ruther loose a subscriber, even Cy Hoskins hisself, than to admit that enny person in Bingville is a bigger man than jest G. Washington.- We don't keer a hang about the $2 (and no cts.) wich is involved, but its the principle of the thing which we keer about. G. Washington was not only the greatest man who ever lived when he did, but he was also the Father of his Country. We persoom there be them in Bingville v ho are so ignorant that they don't know that George was the Father of His Country & if that's so we feel sorry for them, but He was, and that's all there is to it, and we've got the fackts to prooye it. Wlien G. Washington was in his prime this country was ruled by the irun hand of Kink George of Eng land (if we ain't mistaken and we grenerally ain't), and as a result them as desired to conduckt their- I1E Copyright, 1912, by E. A. Groiier. selfs as patrits accordink to the dicktates of their , own conshienses, couldn't do so and as a result they got purty suiky about it. Finally George he says to the patrits, "I tell you what let's do let's deklare oijrselfs free & independent ! Whot do jou fellers say?" And the patrits said, "B'gosh we'H do it!" and they did and -so wart)roke out and the red coats and the patrits fit and fit and bled and bled and fled and fled and they had a awfwl time. Think of the winter the patrits spent at Valley Forge (wherever that is), when the snow was thick on the ground & the thermpmmetter was below zero ! What if us folks in Bingville. had, to .go, through a winter like thatl FgeSs we'd com plain and lament, but did the patrits do so? Answer No, sir ce bob, they didn't ! They jest grinned and I put up with it and when spring come they pitched in and licked the british and established justice, peace prosperity, in x the course of human events when n it becomes necessary to have a conscitooshion, et' cettery, et cettery,' too numerous to mention that's what they done. Hooray for G. Washington and his birthday even if it is went & gone ! PersOnals Lafe Whittacre has had considerable pain in one of his toes for a spell back. He consulted Doc Livermore and Doc said he calkilated it must be frost-bit. He wanted Lafe to let him amputate same to see if that would give him enny relief, but Lafe he objeckted. He said he would ruther have the toe froze on than cut off. Mrs. Lige Green put cit her wash last Monday and it was so cold that It all froze on the line. Mrs. Green says she is a-going to leave it out there til it thaws if she has to wait til spring. Amzi Gookins, our respeckted towns man wh5 fit in the sivil war being hit with a bullet in 1863, where it was never recovered; says he beleeves the the bullet has worked up into his right shoulder, becux he has a pain there of late. He was first shot in the foot. We got two new subscribers last week but no money. Gld Johnson has a boil on his neck. Gid has . boils every spring, but he says they are coming a little rnte. early this year. Mrs. Jerushy Perkins left r ms of spare ribs on our desk recent Thanks awful, Jerushy, they was tumble good catin. They" is some talk of getting up a dance in Bingville soon. It looks a good deal like snow as we go to press, but we hope it wont, we have enuff snow now to lat til spring. Bud Hinckley who ain't quite right in his head, got scratched by Peter Han son's cat tother day. Bud was a-trying to pull of the cats tale,-but failed. . Persunnels is considerable scairse with us this week. If you happen to hear enny next week please let us know. ..i mA -lJ ITHIf BIG! to Write tat This Wk-Scme-tjmes Scmethink Important Like a Skandal or Somethink Hap pens, but Sich Is not the Case This Wk-Why Is This Thus, We Ask? "We Don't Know" We Answer We git turrible disgusted with Fate some wks. " Now take this wk. for instants here we've cudgeled our tirjed brain to think ur' somethink which we could write a long peece about for this ishue of ths Buggle as Ushual, but have we succeeded in thinking up something' important ? No we have not. Why is it that some wks there will be more big important things o write for the Bugle than we've got room for and then fust thing we know along'll come a wk when there ain't skeercely nothin a tall, like this wk. Hod Quigly arid Lem Brown had a few words down to Hen Weathersby's store tother evg over a game of check ers, but nothin come of it. Lem, he said Hod moved onq of his men when he wassent lookin, but Hod said Lem was a liar and then he called Hod a liar, and after they had called each other liars for a spell the Rev. Saml Moore, our beloved paster, drapt into the store, and when he seen that they was about to asalt each other he cammed them down and cooled them off by telliu them that their conduckt was unseemly and nof becaming to members of his flock. As for us we hoped that Lem and Hod would pitch into each other, becuz we wanted somethink to write, but Rev. Moore had to come along and spile it all. We s pose, Rev. Moore means well, but we wish to goodness he would tend to his own bizness instid of spiling tiews for us when news is as skeerce as it is this wk. Locals Miss Phronicia Watkins is reported to be considefin whether to git married this winter or wait until next Jane. Who she is a-going to marry we have not learned. Miss Sally Hoskins, whose bewtiful pomes on "Lore" have cheered tip the readers of the Bugle from time to time, give a popcorn party to a few seleckt friends at hehome last Tuesday eVg. AH report a pleasant time. Hen Smiley's wife give him a pen knife for Xmas and now he's went and lost it like a blamed foot Hen never could keep a knife. Enny person finding said knife kindly return same to Hen. Otherwise he'll haft to buy a new one, but what's the use becuz he would go and lose it also. - Mrs. Abe Skinner tells us that her tens is laying for her at the rate of about a duzzen eggs a day. Who can beat Mrs. Skinner for eggs? While chopping kindling last Sunday morning to bild a fire with Rev. Moore, Our beluwcd pastor, cut his finger near ly almost haff off. Hank Dewberry says that's whot he gits for working on the holy Sabbath. Hank don't beleeve in working on Sunday or enny other day. Dad Henderson got a pair of boots recent which is too big for him and rubs his heels. Dad says he calkilates them boots has wore through seven pair of socks sinst he had em., This is awful hard on socks. Country Correspondence CALAMITY CORNERS. Gale Hooker traded his. mowtn machine for a pair of oxes last week. You ort not to of did it, Gale youU need that mower next harvest Ezekiel Snodgrass was a Bingville vissiter last week. He reports several deep snow drifts betwixt here and there. Sam Snyder of Snake Bend don't visit our midst as often as of yOre. We hope they ain't ennything wrong be tween you and Hetty, Sam. Jake Holmes caught cold recently and now he has a healing in his head. My goodness, but we'd hate to be Jake. PRO BONO PUBLICO. SORROW HOLLOW. Jemima Hoff had a chicken for din ner last Sunday. Mrs. Sam Bellew purchast a teakettle from a peddler tother day, and after he had left she diskuwered that it had a hole in it. Mrs. Bellew beleeves the peddler knowd it all the time. Heck Plympton, while out hunting last week shot at a fox and says he only mist it by a few rods. Heck is a good shot when ennything ain't run nin. He prefers to shoot with a rest Ben McA'.lister went to a birthday party of Homer Wades last Tuesday. Homer had a lot of hard sider on tap, Ben he got a leetle too much in and had to stay all night at Homer's. The boys has been riggin him about it ever sinst VERITAS. Good Ear Lop Sonic peepul is born smart and then agin they is trther peepul whot have-to lent to be smart a.id still others whot newer can lern, but Jake Quimby is one of the smartest chaps in these here parts if we do say it ourself. When Jake's ole brindle cow died last summer Jake he cut off both her ears and n?ild era up agin the barn to dry. WelL when that awful cold snap come on last week Jake he goes and gits them cow's ears and he's been wearing them over his own ears ever sinst. He says his cars newer gits a mite cold. The cow's ears is sich a pertecshion to him that he wars em to bed. Hod's Foot Hurt Mrs. Hod Simmons exidentally let a flat iron fall on Hod's foot on last ironi? day. Hod can't acairsly lift his fot offen the ground it is that sore, nor he " can't hardly put it to the ground again when he gets it lifted. Hod eays he wishes to durnashion that it had fell on tother foot and knocked the daylights outen a corn which has been bothering him for the past 49 years. DON T BE A TIDEWAD ! I Pay up your back, subscription to fbri Bugle & thus fill a long-felt want on o?ir el part We Can't Run a First Claw Net- a paper on Hot Air and Cold Potaoze. S P. S. If wo are not in lea the snoaey with our wife nexV-doeav U I'm gettin turrible sick haulm? passengers and doing urnds for peepul between Bingville and the County seat free gratti for nothink and I hereby give notise that hereafter The Following Rites Will Prev&il. To hauh'ng 1 passenjur from Bingville to the Co. seat 50 ct. For hauling ne passenjur haff way, a quarter. For hauling babies, 10 cts. per head. For carrying a small pack age to Co. seat, 10 cts. For carry ing small package from Co. seat same rrice. Large package, 15 cts. Very large package, ditto. For delivering word of mouth mes sage, nothink at all. These here rates go into effeckt at once. Pleese govern yourself accord in. Yours aiming to pleese, JAKE PEABODY BINGVILLE Stage Driver and Mail Carrier I will buy your bottles off of you if you have enny to sell and the price ain't too steep. I need these bottels to put my medisins into. The bigger the bot tels the better I will like it, but I won't pay enny more for a big bottel than. I wood for a small one, becuz I haft to put more into the big bottel than I do in the small one. If you have enny bottels let me know, and I will come around and look at them. It won't do them enny harm to look at them. D LIVERMORE oc BINGVILLE Horse Dockter and Human Speshiallist pyttiyb V u Hi! I il itpUl a . r"