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The Water Valley Progress
S. B. BROWN. Publisher. WATER VALLEY. : MISSISSIPPI. In 1904 there were mined 9,660.000 tons of coal in Japan. Ten years ago the Japanese coal production did not exceed 3,000,000 tons. Mexican mints turn out more silver money than those of any other coun try in the woild. Last year Mexico shipped several million silver dollars to China. A commercial estimate puts the 1904 bean crop of Michigan at about 4,000,000 bushels, 16 per cent, of which is unsound and fit only for feed for livestock. Forty thousand two hundred and ninety-nine cattle, valued at $3,723,569, an average value per head of $92.40, were exported from the United States in January, 1905. The Vienna Society for the Preven tion of Cruelty to Animals is selling donkeys at remarkably low prices, to replace the dogs generally used for drawing tradesmen’s carts. One of the latest industries devel oped in Vienna and Berlin is the clean ing of playing cards. They are sub jected to various processes and emerge looking like new cards. In Tunbridge Wells, England, a man read in his Bible the passage, “And if thy right hand offend thee cut it off,” and at once went into his yard, took a cleaver and chopped his right hand off. Episcopal women of Cleveland will present the Rev. Dr. Rowe, bishop of Alaska, a silk tent to use on his long and terribly cold trips from station to station, when he usually sleeps in the snow. The hairpins come from Painswick, a village in the Stroud Valley, Eng land. There is the greatest hairpin factory in the world. Strangely enough, t.hi« factory employs only 300, persons, the macnmery useu' being automatic and requiring but little at tention as it grinds miles of wire into tons of hairpins._ A German paper states that during the month of November the number of unemployed persons increased largely in France and England, especially in the latter coluntry, where in 35 munic ipal districts 390,822 persons were out of work or in want. The number of the unemployed working people in the city of London is estimated to be over 200,000. A Japanese is taught that his life is a gift of the holy mikado, and if the country need the lives of her people they should be given gladly, for that is only to return to the mikado what they have received from him. To die on the battlefield is the only key for a Japanese to find his way to his Shinto heaven, and the soldiers who were not killed on the battlefield are considered' unfortunate. To be a valet to a beggar spunds an impossible way of earning a living. Yet in a recent police court case in London it transpired that a man named Webb acted in that capacity to a man without arms, who begged in the streets. Webb stated that his master was “most perticler,” had to be shaved every morning, and. had his teeth brushed three times a day. Webb’s wages were $10 a week. The government has put its ban up on consumptives. Hereafter persons with this disease will be debarred from entering the classified service of the government. This action has been taken by the civil service commission as a precaution against infection of other employes by those afliicted with the diease. The commission is going on the theory advanced by medical au thorities that the germs of tuberculo sis can be transmitted to healthy per sons. August Griebel, of Brooklyn, em ployed as a watchman by John Shultz, a baker, five years ago gave up eating food and substituted milk punches. On these alone he has ex isted ever since, except when he was stricken with malaria, and had to be taken to St. Catherine’s hospital, where he was given liquid nourish ment. The food did not agree with him, and as soon as he was able he protested and walked out. Since then he has never had a sick day. In the 23 years of its existence the Standard Oil Co. has paid $496,065,000 in dividends on its $100,000,000 of stock. This $496,065,000 is consider ably more than one-fifth of all the money—gold, silver and paper—in the United States. The $496,065,000 hith erto distributed does not represent the total profits of the oil combine. What its surplus and undivided profits are no one outside of t£q innermost hierarchy of the oil kings Know* OLD NAN HOGAN Be Borrows a Quarter and Proceeds to Show How to Get Rich Quick— The Kite-Flying of High Finance —The Thrifty Banker—Gold Brick Artist to Be Preferred to Stock Brokers. BY HENRY M. HYDE. (Author of "Buccaneers,” Etc.) (Copyright. 1904, by Joseph B. Bowles.) “Will ye lind me th’ loan av a quar ther?” asked old man Hogan. “Thank ye. Now, whin ye git thired ar thry in’ to make me pay ye back an’ ar-r-e jest about ready to cross th’ quarther off your books, I’ll git ye to inthro duce me to Casey as a good rayliable la-a-d that he kin lind half a dollar to at tin per cint. a month wid perflct [ Have Did Up Me Stocks an’ Bonda. safety. I’ll git th’ half, an’ out av it I’ll pay back your quarther. Whin Casey gits anxious for his money I’ll make him recommind me to some other loan shark that’s lookin’ for a chance to lind a whole dollar. If this new la-a-d wants more than wan rif eren«e'm‘send him to see you “ ‘Yis,’ you’ll say, ‘I’ve lint Hogan money an’ he’s always paid me back.’ What ilse kin ye say? So 1 git th’ dollar an’ out av it I pay Casey his half. Workin’ along th’ same careful an’ conservative lines I gradually git me credit up to th’ pint where it’s no thrick at all to borry tin thousand on me note, backed be th’ ricomminda tions av all th’ feenanceers who have hilped me on me upward progriss. “Be this time they’re beginnin’ to talk about saycurities, so I wrap up a bundle av Sunday supplemints in thick brown paper, tie it wid red tape an’ seal it wid a lot av wax, pastin’ a strip av paper, wid my name wrote on it, across the knot in th’ tape. I take this down to th’ vice presidunt av th’ 'Steenth national bank, a litthle, bald hided, dried-up la-a-d, who likes to make two cints grow where they was only wan bayfure. “ ‘Misther Jones,’ I say, ‘I have been very extravagant. Me illegitimate great-grandfather, J. Vanderfeller Croesus, has often scolded me f_.r spendin’ so much money. Now,’ I says, ‘I am goin’ to rayform. I have did up all me stocks an’ bonds, to the thriflin’ figure av twinty sivin million dollars, in this bundle, an’ I want you to sind thim down to grandpa’s agint in New York. Here’s a list av th’ He’ll Do It Bather Than Lose What He’s Lint Ye Alriddy. stuff,’ I says. ‘Will you please sign this rayceipt for thim?’ “Th’ nixt week th’ la-a-d in New York that you’ve fixed things wid, Binds back to Misther Jones a rayceipt for th’ stuff, signed wid th’ name av Croesus. Along wid it comes a letther sayin’ that grandpa insists on sindln’ his notes for th’ same amount. You leave it all wiS Misther Jones, whose ears ar-r-e wigglin’ at th’ smell av so much money, Tin da-a-ys lather ye come back to see him. “Tm ashamed to say it, Misther Jones,’ you say, ‘but I can’t stop me extravagant habits. I’ve got to have fifty thousand dollars right away to •pind in gratifyin' me taste for dia mond rings. If you kin find me some wan who has fifty to lind I will pay you tin thousand dollars for doin’ it.' ‘‘Misther Jones thinks that he might as will have that tin thousand as anny wan ilse. But he’s goin’ to be careful about it. ‘Will ye assign me wan ay thim notes yere grandpa slnt back?’ he says. “ ‘Yis,’ you say, 'I suppose I must, If you insist. But I wouldn’t leave grand pa find out about It for amiything. He’d be awful mad at me,* ye say, ’for bein’ so rickliss wid me money.’ *“0, that’ll be all right,’ says Mis ther Jones. ‘Ye kin trust me. I am a a very discreet gint.’ ‘‘Thin you sign a note for fifty thou sand, an’ Misther Jones hands you th’ cash. You hand him back tin thousand to pay for his kindness and out ye go wid forty thousand in bills. Th’ rist av it’s easy. Whin Misther Jones gits scared about his forty ye go an’ make him endorse yere note for a hundurd thousand, promisin’ ' to pay him back out av th’ proceeds. He’ll do it rather than lose what he’s lint ye alriddy, an’ so you go on, flyin’ yere kite, unthil wan day there’s a stiff breeze blows out av th’ north an’ carries away th’ tail. Thin there’s the divvle an’ all to pay. Th’ kite comes down, hid first to th’ ground an’ busts into pieces; th’ polis git afther you an’ Jones an’ all th’ rist av thim, an’ ivrybody that readsabout it in th’ pa-a-pers shakes his^Tiid an’ says: ‘What a winderful fell^ that man Ho gan is!’ “But they’s nothin’ wonderful about it. All ye’ve got to do is to find some body who’s greedy to git rich an’ make him believe that you really haven’t got sinse enough to look out for your own intherists. “ ‘Wull,’ he says to himsilf, ‘here’s a fat duck to pick. It’s too bad, av coorse, that it should be wanderin’ around this way loose, widout anny guardeen. But if I don’t take th’ feathers somebody ilse will, an’ it might as will be me. It’s a sbame to take th’ money. It’s like robbin’ th’ baby’s bank. But, after all, there ar-r-e la-a-ds that’d threat it worse than I will. It’s a good thing for it that it happened to run across me.’ '“Whin this la-a-d wakes up an’ finds his bag is full av imitation feathers ye Thin There's th’ Diwle an’ All to Pay. kin hear him yill tor miles in ivry direction. 'It’s a dastardly crime/ he says, ‘for a stuffed duck, covered wid artificial plumage, to allow itsilf to be plucked be a respectable, tin-per-cint a-month-in-advance feenanceer like me. Wring it’s nick,’ he says. “I can’t see so much difference be chune raisin’ money on paper that ain’t worth annythin’ an’, on paper that you know ain’t worth more than tin per cint. av what ye git for it. If it’s wrong to pay a gint tin dollars for loanin’ ye twinty on say curl ty that all’s wather, why should it be right to git money from people cm stocks in which there is jist enough solid sub stance dissolved to form a thin scuya on th’ top av th’ wather? "Bechune th’ two I’d rather do busi ness wid th’ gold brick artist. For, whin it’s all over ye sthill have th’ brick lift to throw at him.” Go to Sleep Gradually. The senses do not fall asleep simul taneously. The eyelids are first affect ed, and shut out siglft; next follows the sense of taste, then smelling, hear ing and touch, the last being the light est sleeper and most easily awakened. Simple. In proceeding to explain the uses of an incubator a London school teacher asked her class: “In what other way could an egg be hatched than by putting it under a hen?” A bright pupil replied: “You might put it under a duck." The Diagnosis. The King—This crown is too heavy; it feels uncomfortable. Court Physician—Your majesty, the fault isn’t with the crown; the trouble is with your head—it’s too light for it!” —Detroit Free Press. Spain’s Output of Lead. Spain produced 175,100 tons of lead in 1903, exceeding the output of all other countries except the United States. Mexico is the third largest producer, and Australia comes fourth in order. Many Persons Have Catarrh of Kidneys, Or Catarrh of Bladder and Don’t Knew It. | President Newhof and Wai Correspondent Richards Wen i Promptly Cured By Pe-ru-na Mr. C. B. Newhof, 10 Delamare street, Albany, N. Y., President Monteflore Club, writes: ** Since my advanced age I find that I have been frequently froubled with urinary aliments. The bladder seemed irritated, and my physician said that It was catarrh caused by a protracted cold which would be difficult to over come on account of my ad va need years. I took Peruna, hardly daring to believe that I would be helped, but / found to my relief that I soon began to mend. The Irritation gradually subsided and the urinary difficulties passed away. I have enjoyed excellent health now for the past seven months. I enjoy my meals, sleep soundly, and am as well as I was twenty years ago. I give all praise to Peruna.”-—C. B. Newhof. Suffered From Catarrh of Kidneys; Threatened With Nervous Collapse* Cured by Pe-ru-na. Mr. F. B. Richards, 609 E Street. N. W., Washington, D. C., War Correspondent, writes: “Exactly six years ago I was ordered to Cuba as staff correspondent of the New York Sun. I was in charge of a Sun Dispatch boat through the Spanish American War. The effect of the trop ical climate and the nervous strain showed plainly on my return to the states. Lassitude, depression to the verge of melancholia, and incessant kidney trouble made me practically an invalid. This undesirable condition continued, despite the best of treatment. Finally a brother newspaper man, who like myself had served in the war, in duced me to give a faithful trial to Peruna. I did so. In a short time the lassitude left me, my kidneys resumed a healthy condition, and a complete cure was effected. I cannot too strongly recommend Peruna to those suffering with kidney trouble. To-day I am able to work as hard as at any time in my life, and the examiner for a leading in surance company pronounced me an “A” risk.” In Poor Health Over Four Years. Pe-ru-na Only Remedy of Real Benefit. Mr. John Nimmo, 215 Lippincott St., Toronto, Can., a prominent merchant of that city and also a member of the Masonic order, writes: “I have been in poor health generally for over four years. When I caught a bad cold last winter it settled in the bladder and kidneys, causing serious trouble. I took two greatly advertised H PRES. C. B. NEWHOF, Suffered From Catarrh of Bladder. kidney remedies without getting the desired results. Peruna is the only remedy which was really of any benefit to me. I have not had a trace of kidney trouble nor a cold in my system.” Pe-ru-na Contains No Narcotics. One reason why Peruna has found per manent use in so many homes is that it contains no narcotic of any kind. Pe runa is perfectly harmless. It can be used any length of time without acquir ing a drug habit. Peruna does not pro duce temporary results. It is permanent in its effect. It has no bad effect upon the system, and gradually eliminates catarrh by re moving the cause of catarrh. There are a multitude of homes where Peruna has been used off and on for twenty years. Such a thing could not be possible If Peruna contained any drugs of a nar cotic nature. _ Say Plainly to Your Grocer That you want LION COFFEE always, and he, being a square man, will not try to sell you any thing else. You may not care for our opinion, but What About the United Judgment of Millions of housekeepers who have used LION COFFEE for over a quarter of a century ? Is there any stronger proof of merit, than the Confidence of file People «md ever increasing popularity ? LION COFFEE Is carefully se lected at the plantation, shipped direct to our various factories, where It Is skillfully roasted and carefully packed In sealed pack ages—unlike loose eoffee, which Is exposed to germs, dust, in sects, etc. LION COFFEE reaches you as pure and clean as when It left the factory. Sold only In 1 lb. packages. Lion-head on every package. Save these Lion-heads for valuable premiuma SOLD BY GROCERS EVERYWHERE WOOLSON SPICE CO., Toledo, Ohio. AsK for a V QUALITY IS OUR MOITUI ■ ■ ' .£• C m MERCANTILE .... BEST BECAUSE TAVFSg JLf A JLrK/VAA w V#JL<# C IjOi' Iv 9 • r K JKj K Jf Eai^S* “I"., 1)11 v lor I llB Mr W| V * * ~ lYT _ VAWA TOBACCO. EQUAL TO IMPORTED CIOAE8. Sold direct to the retailor bp va.ia iuua^v, - ~ mrr if r rn “M5” and “Agents” 5c Cigars Are Leaders of the World. IsJiMS * st. wha. BEST BY TEST "I have tried all kinds of waterproof clothing and have never found anything at any price to compare with your Fish Brand for protection from all kinds of weather." (The name and address of the writer of this unsolicited letter may be had upon application.) A. J. TOWER CO. Boaon, U. S. A. TOWER CANADIAN CO.. LIMITED Toronto, Canada The Sign of the Fish Mahers of Warranted Wet Weather ClotMng Saber's National Oats greatest oat of the centory. Yielded In Ohio 187. In Mleh. 231, In Mo. 265, and In ». Dakota 810 bua. per acre. ,. You can beat that reoord In 1905. For 10c and tills notice we mall yon free lots of farm seed samples and oar bl* catalog, tell ing all about this oat wonder and , thousands of other seeds. JOHN A. SALZER SEED CO.^ U Crosse. EL r% tk TCMTG 48-page bock free, KA I til ■ W U i k h e*t «^r«nct». "lTZUKKALU & CO.. Bo* K, WtuUiin#;uu, D.O.