GOT AN ORDER AND FILLED IT.
The drummers have had some hard
times of it lately. Three of them boar
ded a Chicago, Burlington and Quincy
train at Monmouth the other day and
with long faces began' to discuss the
“I have sold only three bills ofgoods
in four days,” said the Chicago drum
mer, “and didn’t get a nibble in Mon
“Neither olid I,” said the Burlington
drummer, “and 1 haven’t made expen
ses this week.”
“Now, to show you how funny luck
runs,” spoke up the St. Louis man,
out thirteen days now, and hadn’t sold
a dollar’s worth of goods until to-day.
In Monmouth I took one solid order.”
“The thunder you did!” ejaculated
the unbelieving listeners.
“Yes, boys. I’ll tell you how 1 did it.
It’s a pointer for you. Yon know that
big Dutchman that keeps a grocery
there on the square near the postoffice,
I s’pose. Didn’t you call on him?
Well, I did. I was desperate, too, and
was bound to sell or talk him to death.
I stuck to him three straight hours,
boys, but I fetched him. Just as I was
getting hoarse, he turned around kind
o’ quick and business-like, and says:
‘I poot a stop on this. I gif you an
orter, und I vant it villed pooty quick,
too, I know when I’f enoof. I’m no
delephone to schtan oop und he dalked
at all de day long!’ ”
“Bet it made you feel good,” said
the Chicago man; “first customer in
thirteen days. But what did he order?”
“That’s the worst of it,” replied St.
Louis. “He ordered me out of his
Marks of a Good Cow.—The head
should be tine and bony, with small
horns, large, mealy nose and shapely
ears. The base of the horns and the
inside of the ears should he of a bright
golden color. We have never yet seen
an animal with horns and ears well
colored (golden yellow) which failed
to make a fine quality of butter and
highly colored. It is an unmistakable
sign. The body should be of good size,
and the width and depth rapidly in
crease as it runs to the rear or hind
quarters. The milk veins should be
large and prominent, and the udder
need not necessarily be large, so it is
not meaty, but is very small when
milked out. The teats should be of
good size, and only have a single hole
in each; we have seen quite a number
with teats having two holes. The hair
should be fine and soft while the skin
should be soft to the touch as velvet.
In color it should be tinged deeply
with yellow, especially on the shoulders
and flank, and along the back. The
color of the hair is rather a secondary
matter, though the best cows are gen
erally yellow, fawn, gray or white with
dark marks edged with yellow. Black
cows but seldom prove to be good
general purpose ones, though of course
there are exceptions frequently met
with.—Cor. Maryland Farmer.
A Dodo in a Leather Back— One
of the gayly-painted mail wagons
which ply between the post office and
the various depots, and which contin
ually remind the pedestrian of “the
greatest show on earth,” was down at
the Union depot the other day, when
a stranger looked it carefully over and
inquired of a policeman:
“Circus in town?”
“No, not exactly.”
“What sort of an animal have they
got in there?”
“Can’t you read?”
“I can when I'm to hum, but this
snow kinder blinds me.”
“Well, it’s a dodo, I believe.”
“And, where are they going to take
“Oh, up town a piece. If you follow
the wagon you'll be apt to see him un
“I believe I will. I haven’t seen one
of those animuls since I was a boy,
and if there ain’t no charge for it I
might as well take a squint.”
He followed the wagon at a trot,
and was absent about half an hour.
When he returned the officer asked:
“Well did you see the dodo?”
“Not a hair of him,” was the dis
gusted reply. “I got already to, but
I’ll be hanged if they didn’t have him
in a leather bag.”—Detroit Free I’ress.
The Cost of the Capitol.—I have
been figuring up what this Capitol oi
ours has cost us since the beginning,
and I*find that the amount is over
$100,000,000. The subject was investi
gated by Congress in 1870. The total
at that time was a cost of $94,302,423:
since then $5,500,000 has been paid out
for public buildings alone, and the
amounts paid out for works of art,
park decorations and other things will
run the total far ahead of the amounts
-_—■ 0 ^ ♦
When a bachelor says he is single
from choice, it makes him mad to ask
him why the girl made choice of some
A medical writer says that girls are
so constructed that they cannot jump.
Just make one of them an offer ol
marriage and see.
A lawyer, too proud to allow his
friends to suppose that he practices ii:
divorce courts, advertises “Misfit mar
riages a specialty.”
The ancients had queer ideas about
mourning for the dead.
The Egyptian women ran through
the streets crying, with their bosoms
exposed and their hair disordered.
Tiie Lycians regarded mourning as
unmanly, and they compelled men who
went into mourning to put on female
In Greece, when a popular General
died, the whole army cut off their hair
and the manes of their horses.
At the present day, the Arabian wo
men stain their hands and feet with in
digo, which they suffer to remain eight
days. They also carefully abstain from
milk during this time, on the ground
that its white color does not accord
with the gloom of their minds.
In China the mourning color is white.
Mourning for a parent or a husband is
required there by law, undera penalty
of sixty blows and a year's banishment.
When the Emperor dies, all his sub
jects let their hair grow for a hundred
In the Fejee Islands, on the tenth
day of mourning the women scourge
all the men except the highest chiefs.
Another fashionable custom there re
quires the friends and relatives of the
deceased to assemble on the fourth day
after the funeral and picture to them
selves the amount of corruption the
corpse has sustained by that time.
In the Sandwich Islands persons de
sirous of going into mourning paint
the lower part of their faces black, and
knock out their front teeth. No doubt
this causes a very sincere kind of
mourning for the present time.
Stood by the Customer.—“Any
thing I can show you to-day?” asked
“Well, ahem, yes,” replied the younj;
lady as she placed a package on the
counter. “Did these ear-rings come
“Did they cost $45?”
“They were a Christinas present, yoi
And tlie jeweler retires to the rear o
the store and whisperingly inquires:
“Joe, who bought those?”
“A young dude who is probably tha
“What was the price?”
“And what were we to say it shi
“Forty-five—solid gold—real pearls.’
“Yes—ahem—you know,” sayTs tin
jeweler as he returns to the counter
“happy to inform you that the origina
price was $75, but as the purchaser i
one of our best customers we let then
go for $45. Bring’em in any time yoi
want $70 in cash.”
Exit young lady looking tickled ti
One of the most remarkable fungi o
which there is any record grew in thi
wine cellar of Sir Joseph Banks. Hi
received a cask of wine as a gift, am
finding it too sweet had it locked uj
in a cellar to ripen. There it remainei
for three years, probably during thi
time he was with Captain Cooke in hi:
voyage around the world. At the enc
of that period he directed his butler ti
ascertain the state of the wine, but tin
cellar door could not be opened on ac
count of some powerful obstacle with
in. The door was cut down, when thi
cellar was found to be completely fillet
with a fungus so dense and firm as t<
require an axe for its removal. It wa
then discovered that the fungus ha<
consumed every drop of wine am
raised the empty cask to the ceiling.
“I’ll bet they are married,” whis
pered Tom to Charley, in reference ti
a couple on the other side of the car
“They haven't spoken ten words
either of them, since they came in, an<
not so much as a single smile ha
lighted up his face or hers. Yes, sir
you can make up your mind they ari
married.” “You cant always judge b;
appearances, Tom,” replied Charley
“They are not married. She is a thief
and he is an officer carrying her off ti
■ 1 ■- 0 ^ ♦
In 1846 Charles Barret, of Ashburn
ham, Mass., took out a life-insuranc
policy in a New Haven association
He is now ninety-six year old. Re
cently7 he received a check for $1,024.1
from the insurance association fron
which he took the policy, accompaniei
by a letter saying that as he liai
reached the extreme limit- of life ac
cording to the mortality table upoi
■which the business of the associatioi
was based, he was entitled to the fill
amount of his policy.
“Yes,” she said, “Mary-came nea
being an old maid. You see, her fat he
was a Governor, her brother a Colonel
and her brother-in-law a scientist o
note. Being of such a distinguishes
family she had to be very particula
whom she married, and she came bil
ing near not getting anybody.”
Contentment swells a mite into
talent, and makes even the poor riche
than the Indies.
That was a good prescription give
by a physician to a patient, “Do souk
thing for somebody.”
We become wise too late in life.
Trust not him who seems a saint.
He doetli much that loveth much.
On the day of victory no weariness
Tlie worst of collisions—running in
Women have no worse enemies than
A seedy coat may cover a heart in
The fire of vanity is fed by the fuel
If pride leads the van, poverty brings
up the rear.
Devotion sweetens all that courage
No matter what you were; look to
what you are.
No one knows the weight of an
The first and worst of all faults is to
cheat one’s self.
The small courtesies sweeten life, the
greater ennoble it.
The milestone of to-morrow leads to
the town of “never.”
The hearts of men are their books;
events are their tutors.
It is weak, and vicious people who
cast the blame on fate.
The grumblers never work, and the
workers never grumble.
Keep clear of the man who does not
value his own character.
The greatest gift we can bestow on
others is a good example.
No man can get rich by sitting
around stores and saloons.
Let thy son learn a trade; it will be
good for him in the future.
It is a good thing to learn caution
by the misfortune of others.
A man’s hobby rides him a great
ilnul nftorinn f nL „ D
To win, work and wait—but work a
good deal more than you wait.
Whatever you dislike in another,
take care to correct in yourself.
The seed of our punishment is sown
at the same time we commit sin.
Somebody else will if I don’t. This
is one of the devil’s pet proverbs.
The greatest evidence of demorali
zation is the respect paid to wealth.
Kindness makes friends, and friend
. ship is of greater value than money.
Wisdom is the talent of buying vir
’ tuous pleasures at the cheapest rate.
It is a little singular that a crank
J cannot be turned in the right direction
3 We must do what we can for oui
, neighbor, and leave the future to Cfod
i There is no such thing as beinj.
proud before man, and humble befort
He who laughs at cruelty sets his
heel on the neck of religion and godli
! Contact with the world sooner oi
1 later tells a man the truth about him
. Probably the man who never mads
a mistake in his life never made any
' thing else.
[ At the last day it will not be asked
, what we did, or what we believed, but
, what we loved.
Chapin once said beautifully: “The
. fatal fact about the hypocrite is that
> he is a hypocrite.”
I It is not enough to remember the
> poor. Give them something to make
i them remember you.
* There is no strength in exaggeration
* even the truth is weakened by being
expressed too strong.
Iron is the most firmly united in the
fiercest Maine and the same is true of
There is no dispute managed without
nflSKIGn mwl vot thova ic wfMirda n rliu.
I * »
. pute wortli a passion.
There are men to whom we cannot
, possibly give enough to prevent them
, from demanding more.
Don’t judge a man by his speech,
, for a parrot talks, for the tongue is but
) an instrument of sound.
Great men undertake great things,
because they are great, and fools be
- cause they think them easy.
! If every person would be half as
• good as he expects his neighbor to bt
~ what a heaven this would be.
( He who does a base thing in zeal foi
I his friend, burns the golden threat
j that ties their hearts together.
It is with you as with plants; fron
i the first fruit they bear we learn whai
l may be expected in the future.
1 The man who married a girl becaust
she “struck his fancy,” says she strike:
him anywhere that comes handy now
r Lambkin says the only sure preven
1 tive against western rivers rising wouk
> be for him to own a few shares in ’em
j Care will kill a cat, says the proverb
We think the proverb lies. The work
is full of care, but the cats still hanj
“I’m afraid, Bridget, that we slial
x not be able to live together any long
r er.” “An’ sure mum, where is you’<
Mr. Sissendorf always trembles whei
n his wife sings in church, with prayer
>- ful earnestness: “Oh for a thousam
WALTER A. WOOD’S
New Iron Frame Twine Binder,
With RTNDLE CARRIER ATTACHMENT. Lightest Draft and least com
plicated Binder in the market. Also
WOOD’S DME./'LIPIEJIE^S -A.ILTID MOWERS.
DEERE RIDING AND WALKING CULTIVATORS, TIGER AND RED
BIRD HORSE RAKES. SOUTH BEND AND DIAMOND IRON
PLOWS, DARNELL’S PATENT FURROWER AND MARK
ER, an excellent article for marking Com Ground, &c,
BATEMAN’S IRON AGE CULTIVATOR with HORSE HOE and CORN
COVERING ATTACmiENT. MATTHEWS AND PLANET JR.
SEED DRILLS, WHEEL HOES. LAWN MOWERS AND
GRASS EDGERS. SHOVELS, HOES, RAKES, and
all kinds of tools for farmers and gardeners.
BURLINGTON FRUIT BOXES!
3D. BACON &c SON,
Corner Commerce and Atlantic Sts., Bridgeton.
HEADQUARTERS RUBBER GOODS.
Superior, Extra and Standard -three-ply Garden Hose, Hose Reels, Lawn Sprinklers, Pipes
Louplmg, &c. Also a full lineot Ladies’, Misses’and Gents’Gossamer Waterproofs and Heaw
JONES & GETZ,
aprii 3 ly 827 Market Street, Philadelphia.
R. SCULL & SOI
No, 11S. Laurel Street,
Our popular line of WALL
PAPER has been reinforced by
a large and well selected stock
for the Spring trade.
Our line of GOLD PAPER
excels any heretofore shown,
both in quality and design.
Also BORDERS to match in
any desired width. .
We have also a large line of
CHEAP PAPERS which are
equally as good in design as
the more expensive papers.
Persons wishing to paper at a
small cost, would do well to
examine these goods.
Window Shades, a ready
made shade on Fixture, com
plete to hang, in all the popu
lar colors, at 45 cts. each.
Oil Shading extra heavy, we
are selling at 18 cts. per yard.
Nickel Rings, Nickel Bars,
and Silk Trimming of all de
Our stock is replete with all
the newest goods at the lowest
; possible prices.
i PAINTING, GRAINING,
| PAPER HANGING, SHADE
1 HANGING, &c., by experi
Soliciting an examination of
| our stock, we remain respect
C. R. SCULL & SON,
Successors to C. U. Scull.
I MITCHELL’S ATLAS
III OF THE WORLD.
NEW EDITION. THE BEST AND CHEAP
EST ATLAS PUBLISHED.
: Sal. .,1 il I Rnn« STDBFS.
. : wm. m. Bradley & Bito., Publishers,
I 1020 ARCH ST.. PH ID A DELPHI A, l’A.
Send for Circular. ap 10-4t
The largest stock of
Pure, Fresh ami Reliable
Early Jersey Wakefield Cabbag
Beans, Peas, Cabbage. Tomatoes, Ct
cumbers, Radishes, Celery, Sweet
Corn, Beets, Melons, &c.
I would especially call your attention to m
Extra Early Peas,
Extra Early Tomatoes
Having secured a stock of this excellent am
unparalleled Hadish, I put it on the market to
the lirst time—having boon in the hands of onl'
two or three truckers, who kept it out of th
I have also in stock a good line of tools fo
garden use, such as
Hoes, Rakes, Shovels, Wheel Hoes
Wheel Plows, and in fact every
thing for the garden.
J. LEWDEN ROBESON
103 Commerce St.. Bridgeton.
CS^GIVE ME A CALL.
oot 4-1 v
Watches, Jewelry, Siyerwari
25 Commerce St., East of Bridge.
While the above heading would seem to be sul
flcient to indicate the character of my stocl
yet 1 must call attention to a few special lint
upon which thought and care have been cj
Such as Knives, Forks, Spoons, Castors ar
other ware is varied in style, and the celebrate
makes of the country are among my selection
Are of the Waltham make, with fine Keyston
cases. Gold and Silver Open Face and Huntin
Cases. Stem and Key Winders.
In gold, silver and steel frames, are King'
make, of which I am sole agent. A silver nos
piece is attached to each steel frame, thereb
preventing rust. The sizes are varied to sui
Will be given to customers desiring Spectacle!
that selections may not be made, which wi
prove injurious to the eve.
T^OUll CERTIFICATES OF STOCK IX TH
l1 name of Mrs. Abigail Lake,deo’d, lortwelv
shares of the “Atlantic Company for the Cu
ture of Cranberries, numbering No. 23,o share!
No. 101,5 shares; No. 202, 1 share; No 417,
share, have been lost, ami application will b
made to the Secretary of said Association ft
re-issue of said certificate.
( HAS. C. GROSSCFP, Administrate
T. A. HEWITT & SON,
BRIDGETON, N. J.
Having associated myself with my
father, T. A. Hewitt, in the business
of TAILORING AND GENTS’ FUR
NISHING GOODS,I would be much
pleased to have my friends call and
see me at all times, whether they
wish to purchase or not.
FRANK L. HEWITT.
^ hen you are wanting any good
and STYLISH CLOTHES, we would
like you to call and see us before
placing your order with others. We
guarantee a GOOD FIT, STYLISH
GOODS AND GOOD WORK.
We never want any customer to
leave our store unless they are per
fectly satisfied with their purchase.
We have a very fine line of NOBBY
AND STAPLE HATS, from 50 cents
to $5.00. We can show the finest
line of Neck-wear in the city.
, We will not enumerate all that we
have, but ask you to come and see
us, and you will find everything per
taining to a first-class Gents’ Furnish
, ing Store.
Come and examine our stock, as
we feel assured we can please the
most fastidious tastes.
T. A. HEWITT & SON,
20 West Commerce St.
Actual Surplus over all Liabilities, in
cluding Reinsurance, Fire
| $21,203 50.
Rates Low. Security Unques
Policies Liberal—Honest—No Two
„ Thirds Swindle in Them.
• Settlements Prompt and Managemen
Agents wanted wherenot represented.
F. REEVES, Pres:
R. L. HOWELL, Sec.
! Watch kS
Beautiful Choice Articles
| very .Low Jrnces.
The Old Jewelry Stand,
8 S, Second Street, below Market,
F. L. ARC HAMB AULT.
'! AGENTS WANTED FOR
B PEN AND PENCIL SKETCHES
1 Of its Scenery, History, Traditions, Public and
Social Life, with graphic descriptions of the
Capitol, Congress, and White House, and the
Government Departments, with view-sat Mount
, \ mum, a Man of Washington, and diagrams
| of the Halls of Congress. Ity JOSEPH WEST
3 To all classes this is a book of great interest.
» It is concise, graphic, thorough, and interest
} ing, illustrated by over 100 beautiful new en
t graxings by leading American artists, and ele
gantly bound, a book for all homes. Sold only
Agents are meeting with grand success.
Agents wanted, male or female, in ex*ery
, township in the United States. Previous expe
1 rience, while desirable, not absolutely required,
as we give instructions necessary for success.
If unemployed, write us. For terms to Agents
address the Publishers.
J. A. & R. A. REID, Providence, R. I.
Wright’s Indian Vegetable Pills
And nil Bilious omplaints.
Safe to take, being purely vegetable; nogriping.
Price 25 cents. All Druggists.
' march 20-4t
DIIDTIIDU I Curo guaranteed by Dr
1 KUrlUnt! J.u. MAYER. Under
b ■ ■ this treatment, ease is at once obtained,
r Persons can attend to their business immedi
ately after treatment. Examination free. Send
stamp forreply. Main office,881 Arch St.,Phil
adelphia. march 1-ly
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