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The Bluffton news. [volume] (Bluffton, Ohio) 1875-current, December 16, 1943, Image 7

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THUKSIJAY. dev. 16. 1U43
CHAPTER II—Private Hargrove
tells of the physical exam, the first
few days of army, how he was out
fitted with his uniform, and how on
the sixth day he received his first
KP duty. He is classified as a semi
skilled cook.
CHAPTER III—Hargrove relates
his conversation with his sergeant
who is trying to find out why he
spends so much time on KP duty.
He also reports on the session the
trainees are put through by the ex
ercise sergeant. He has trouble
learning how to handle his rifle and
is given plenty of special attention
by the sergeant and corporal.
CHAPTER IV—Private Hargrove
relates some of the incidents sur
rounding the advancement in rank
by some of his friends. Why he
fails to so advance is a puzzle to
his sergeant, who inquires about it.
CHAPTER V—Hargrove is given
review of his faults by his ser
geant who tells him to snap out of
it and start working for his cor
poral’s stripes. He also gets a les
son in the art of goldbricking.
CHAPTER VI—Private Hargrove
lists a series of army slang defini
tions for the enlightenment of the
civilian population. He also tells
how he and two of his pals spoil a
perfectly good date for one Private
Zuber. Going home on furlough he
goes to visit a newspaperman friend
who dominates their conversation
recounting his experiences in the
first World War. He also under
goes another trying experience at
CHAPTER VII—Private Hargrove
continues to relate the incidents sur
rounding his camp life and tells
about being outfitted for an over
coat. A week-end is spent on man
euvers on the South Carolina coast
He gets a good case of sunburn.
CHAPTER VIII—Hargrove gets
his first taste of army cooking
school reports on his daily activi
ties there. He tells also about the
real meaning of army morale and
how it affects new inductees.
CHAPTER IX—How the evening
bull sessions progress and how much
the soldiers enjoy them are the sub
ject of Private Hargrove’s next re
port He learns he has been re
classified to do public relations work
on the camp paper.
“Private Hargrove,” I said to my
self, “you have been doing quite
too much gallivanting lately. There
have been too many movies, too
many bull sessions, too many hours
spent at the Service Club and too
much time spent flirting with that
cute little waitress at the delicates
sen in Fayetteville. Tonight, Pri
vate Hargrove, you will take this in
teresting and improving book, read
it until Lights Out and go to bed
promptly at nine o’clock.’’
There was a little back talk, a
little argument, a little entreaty.
How’ever, the forces of Truth and
Progress prevailed. Immediately
after supper I adjourned to the
squadrcom, arranged myself com
fortably on my bunk and dug into
the interesting book. Peace and
quiet held sway about me.
As luck would have it, this same
sudden decision toward a Quiet eve
ning at Home struck several fellow
members of the squadroom at the
same time. Six or seven near-by
bunks sported occupants who usu
ally disdained the comforts of home
until at least nine o’clock. Books
were brought out from the foot lock
ers, pens and papers made their
appearance, and one ambitious and
energetic flower of the nation even
got out his shoe polish and went to
Private Wesley Sager, late of Am
sterdam, New York, grew weary of
the quiet. Yawning widely, he rolled
over in bed and with a sudden
swoop yanked the pillow from be
neath the head of Private Melvin
Hart. “Yippee,” screamed Private
Sager, tossing the pillow across the
squadroom to a willing accomplice.
“Yippee,” screamed the willing ac
complice, tossing the pillow back to
Private Sager.
Private Hart rose and retrieved
his pillow with dignity and formali
ty. He placed it on his bunk,
smoothed it and laid his head upon
it. Three privates sighed in resigna-,
tion. The incorrigibles were at it
Private Sager lay quiet for a
while. Then he broke into a loud,
regular, but unconvincing snore. The
three sighing privates did not re
turn to their occupations, but lay in
philosophic expectation. Once the
boys in that corner got started,
nothing but physical exhaustion
could stop them.
Private Sager turned as if tossing
in his sleep. Private Hart noted
the move and held his book ready
to strike if a hand came toward
his pillow. Private Sager turned
again, facing away from Private
Hart, and Private Hart relaxed his
vigil. When he did, the hand shot
out once more and the pillow sailed
across the room and into waiting
Again Private Hart retrieved the
pillow and again he lay down.
“Why/’ he asked, “%wst you behave
Private Hargrove!
by Marion Hargrove
CHAPTER I—Edward Thomas
Marion Lawton Hargrove, feature
editor of the Charlotte (N. C.) News,
receives notice from his draft board
that he is to be inducted into the
army. Before he begins an account
ing of his actual experiences in
training camp he issues his quota
of free advice to prospective in
ductees. After his induction Har
grove, with his new buddies, leaves
for Fort Bragg, where he is to re
ceive his basic training.
like a two-year-old infant? Can’t
you act like a normal adult?”
“Sure I can,” Private Sage’ re
plied. “Kindly step outside with me
and put up your fists.”
Private Hart gave vent to a quiet
and gentlemanly oath. “Please do
me the honor to shut your mouth,”
he requests. “I should like to read
•without the clamor of your big yap
roaring in my ears.”
This is but the opening gun. Al
most daily it marks the beginning of
a half-hour session of blusters,
threats, extravagantly insulting re
marks, and repeated invitations
from each side for the other to step
outside and settle it. Nothing ever
comes of it and soon the contending
parties tire of the play.
Silence reigns again, but its throne
is shaky. Private Hart tires of his
book and turns to Private Sager.
“Were you at the dance last night
when the redhead got started telling
what she thought of Jim Carney’s
Private Carney picks up the bait.
“Anything Hart says about me or
about what anybody else says about
me is entirely fictitious, and any
resemblance to persons living or
dead is coincidental and not intend
Private Sager sits up suddenly in
bed. “Don’t talk like that about
Hart,” he says in a quiet, serious,
and menacing voice. “Anything you
say about Hart is a personal insult
to me. If you’re inclined to insult
me, kindly take off your stripe and
step outside with me.”
“Don’t you go talking like that to
the ranking first-class private of this
section,” rasps Private Hart. “I
don’t like your manner at all. Kind
ly step outside with me while I beat
your brains out.”
If you want peace and quiet on
these stay-at-home nights, the best
solution is to go to the second bar
racks down the line. There’s no
body down there except fifty-eight
members of the band, who are al
ways rehearsing at this time of
Slang runs wild in the Army. It’s
like a disease or the liquor habit.
Among the boys who sit around on
the back steps after Lights Out and
bat the breeze far into the night,
no simple and understandable Eng
lish word is used where a weird and
outlandish concoction can be sub
Water is GI lemonade. Salt is
sand or Lot’s wife pepper is
specks sugar is sweetening com
pound. Milk is cat beer butter,
dogfat. Ketchup is blood. In the
untiring imagination of the soldier,
green peas become China berries
A new and gullible man is sent for
the cannon report, or the rubber
flag which is used on rainy days.
hominy grits are glamorized into
Georgia ice cream rice is swamp
seed. Potatoes become Irish grapes
prunes change to strawberries hot
cakes become blankets. Bread is
punk and creamed beef on toast is
punk and salve. Meat loaf and hash
are kennel rations.
It is strictly against the code of
the Army to say a complimentary
word about the food or the cook, no
matter how good the food is or how
hard the cook labors to make it so.
Oscar of the Waldorf in the Army,
would still be either a slum-burner
or a belly-robber.
Back at the News, the boys in the
composing room and the mailing
department used to send greenhorns
searching all over the building for
erasing ink, striped or dotted ink,
paper stretchers, and other non ex
istent items. Here, a new and gul
lible man is sent for the cannon re
port, or for the biscuit gun, the
flagpole key, or the rubber flag
which is used on rainy days.
Here are some of the most popu
lar figures of speech:
Army Bible—the Articles of
War regulations.
Barrage—a party, especially
where the Demon Rum rears its
ugly head.
Blanket drill—sleep.
Butchershop—9 dispensary or
By the numbers—like clock
work with precision and effi
Chili bowl—regulation haircut.
Chest hardware—medals.
Didie pins—the gold bars of a
second lieutenant.
Dog robber—an orderly.
The eagle—money. On pay
day, the eagle flies.
Front and center—come for
Flying time—sleep.
Gashouse—a beer joint.
Goof off—to make a mistake.
Handshaking—playing up to
Higher brass the higher
rarks-Qt officers,_____________
Dreaming of a White Christmas ..
well we got it Tuesday what if it
was ten days early everything
about Christmas has been early this
year. mailed overseas gifts way
back in October and Christmas
cards galore and shopping got
underway so early that the boys aren’t
expecting much last minute buying
and retailers will tell you off the
record, of course that this Christmas
season is the tops for cash customers
and the volume could have been
much more if there had been enough
merchandise and buying has lost
much of last year’s war hysteria
shoppers taking substitutes in their
stride—all except the subdebs who
can’t forget nylon hose and to
think that grandma lived for eighty
years, happily, we trust, without ny
lons winter’s here officially since
the News editor got his fur cap out
of mothballs Monday and the
kids are asking Santa for ice skates
with prospects of using them since
the cold snap Monday night but
maybe Santa can’t bring anything this
year—'cause he may have flu like
everyone else now ... all of w’hich
leaves us wondering how we’re going
to sing joyous Christmas carols with
a cold in our head and frog in our
Bluffton will welcome a hometown
girl Sunday night when Opal Berry
Stauffer of Columbus appears as one
of the soloists at the^annual Messiah
concert. One of the oustanding vocal
ists of the capital city, she got her
stirt on a music career in a local
church choir and Bluffton college con
How many of you folks who went to
Bluffton Grade school ever saw the
furnace room. We remember of
peerin into it once—a rather dark and
gloomy place—uninviting to say the
least. But now it’s one of the show
spots of the building since Janitor
Hollywood corporal—an acting
Holy Joe—the chaplain.
Honey wagon the garbage
Housewife—a soldier’s sewing
Jubilee—reveille, w-hich is too
often pronounced “revelee.”
Mother Machree—a sob-story
Pocket lettuce—paper money.
Pontoon checks canteen
checks, good for credit at* the
post exchange.
Ride the sickbook—to gold
brick the easy way by pretend
ing to be ill.
Shoulder hardware—the shoul
der insignia of a commissioned
For general purposes set the thermostat
on your automatic gas heater at 130
degrees F.
if the heater is a storage type, a few
quarts of water should be drained out by
means of a faucet at the bottom, about
once a month to prevent sediment.
Avoid waste through dripping faucets.
If your heater is operated manually, do
not heat more water than you need as water
stored in uninsulated tanks cools rapidly.
Do not ute more hot water than neces
sary. Avoid waste.
Remember: Take care of wKat you have.
Leri Gable has painted and decorated
it and invited pupils and teachers in
to see what a difference a little paint
will make. Janitor Gable, formerly
a painter by trade, is making good
use of his ability in brightening up
the old building.
Confusion in livestock circles—re
ports that calves were selling all the
w-ay from 25c to $2 at a community
auction the past w-eek. Lack of feed,
labor shortage and conditions gen
erally, make buyers hesitant to make
commitments, farmers say.
Yes sir—there will be a Winter
Fair in Bluffton after boys et back
from attending to business in Europe
and south Pacific. And the fair will
be bigger and better than ever—in
order to make up for the years missed
during the war.
Salary boost for three of Bluffton’s
municipal offices going into effect the
first of the year—including the board
of public affairs—the one really hot
spot in the town’s roster.
Sate highway crews measuring the
width of Bluffton’s Main street, Mon
day afternoon. Nothing of undue
significance as some onlookers' sus
pected. They w-ere taking measure
ments in order to run a white center
dividing line for traffic down the mid
dle of the street.
“We read the News from stem to
stern,” said Lt. (j. g.) James Miller
of St. Augustine, Florida, here with
his family on leave for a week. Just
in case you can’t identify him, we’ll
hasten to explain that it’s Jim Miller,
former Bluffton high school backfield
man on the football team who used to
spark the Pirates’ attack. He’s now
in the coast guard and handles sailor
terms like an old salt.
This winter may see some new fur
coats made from locally taken skins.
Several trappers are reported to be
accumulating pelts with this aim in
Thought for the week— "The pen
alty which the good, refusing to gov
ern, must pay, is to be governed by
worse men.” Socrates.
Enamel Garbage Pail
Injured spots on a white-enameled
garbage pail may be healed by first
rubbing with steel wool or sand
paper to remove rust and to pro
duce a smooth surface, then painting
over with refrigerator enamel.
Bread Worshiped by Many
Bread is truly worshiped in cer
tain parts of the world. In Moroc
co, for example, it is considered
unholy to cut bread with a knife,
and in mountainous regions of Asia
it is treasured so highly that it is
wrapped in silk and locked in a
strong box.
Miss Elnora Marshall spent the
past week in the Ray Marshall home
assisting Mrs. Marshall while Mr.
Marshall is in the hospital.
Cadet Kenneth Marshall was re
cently transferred from the Univer
sity of Indiana at Bloomington, Ind.
to the University of Cincinnati to
continue his studies.
Miss Elizabeth Campbell spent a
couple of days the past week with
her sister, Mrs. Delmar Reagan in
Dayton. Lieut, and Mrs. Reagan re
turned home with her and were over
Sunday guests of Mr. and Mrs. D. C.
The annual Christmas program
will be given at the Presbyterian
church Sunday evening at 8 o’clock.
Anyone interested is cordially invit
Mrs. W. E. Marshall attended a
dinner last Tuesday evening when
Mrs. Harold Bales, Worthy Matron
of Bluffton chapter, O. E. S. enter
tained her officers afid a group of
friends associated with her the past
year. The dinner was given in the
home of Mrs. Bales parents, Mr. and
Mrs. John Watkins in Bluffton.
Mrs. Milton Downs of Lima and
son Paul, who was at home on fur
lough, took dinner last Wednesday
with Mr. and Mrs. F. C. Marshall
and son Robert.
Mrs. Harold Marshall opened her
home to members of the Au Revoir
club for a dinner meeting last Thurs
day. The day was spent with needle
work. Mrs. Clarence Begg was a
Word was received here that Miss
Clara Dunlap a music teacher of
near Vaugnsville, who is well known
here, was killed when her automobile
was struck by a train on a country
road near Vaugnsville, Saturday
The Methodist missionary society
will meet Thursday evening in the
home of Mrs. Clyde Van Meter for
their December program and a gift
Mr. and Mrs. Herbert Marshall
spent a couple of days last week in
the vicinity of Windsor, Ont.
Mrs. Sidney Hauenstein will open
her home to members of the Friend
ly Neighbors club for the December
meeting, Thursday afternoon. The
following program has been arrang
ed: Song, Club Roll call, Bible verse,
Devotions, Mrs. Osa Reams "Christ
mas Story”, Miss Elnora Marshall
Poem, Mrs. Clyde Van Meter Sing
ing accompanied by Mrs. William
Stephens. A gift exchange will be
a feature of the social hour.
Miss Beard of the Extension Dept,
at Ohio State University and Miss
Ruth Winner, Allen county Home
Demonstration agent will be at Mon
roe Center, Friday of this week to
All of us who live in Ohio no matter
what our jobs may be would have a
hard time even imagining this State of
ours without its great industries in opera
tion. In peacetime they wrote a big
chapter in the history of America’s in
dustrial progress—now in wartime they
are one of the most powerful “arsenals
of Democracy”!
In the last peacetime count, 10,070 indi
vidual manufacturing establishments
were employing far more than half a
million fellow citizens in Ohio to turn
out goods valued at billions of dollars
yearly. Today many of these plants are
manufacturing products far removed
from their usual merchandise—building
well the tools of total war for use on
fighting front and home front alike.
give a demonstration of the care and
repair of household equipment and
electrical appliances. All women of
Monroe township in particular are
urged to attend, and bring with you
something that needs repairing and
the necessary equipmet for it's re
pair. All are asked to bring a
screwdriver. The demonstration
starts at 10 o’clock with a pot luck
dinner at the noon hour. This is
your invitation.
Fire of undetermined origin de
stroyed the general store in Rock
port, owned and operated by Mr. and
Mrs. Wilber Lentz. The fire was
discovered about 10:30, Thursday
night by Mrs. Milford Everett who
notified the people of the village and
a call was put in for the Lentz
family who had gone to their home
in Columbus Grove, the Bluffton fire
department was called and neighbors
of the community summoned, but the
fire had gained such headway that
no one could enter, so the building
and all its contents were burned.
140 N. Main Street Phone 368-W
Public Sale
Owing to the death of my husband, I will sell at public
auction 2 miles west and miles north of Beaverdam, or
2 miles southwest of Rockport
Friday, December 17
2 HORSES—Consisting of bay team 7 and 9 years
old, weight 2800, good work pair.
5 CATTLE—Shorthorn cow with calf by side Brown
Swiss cow with calf by side black heifer with calf by
side Brown Swiss cow to freshen in spring Brown Swiss
bull calf 8 months old.
HOGS—8 shoats averaging 125 pounds.
Black Hawk corn planter McCormick grain binder 7
ft. cut walking breaking plow sulky plow 2 row com
cultivator single row cultivator tandem disc hay rake
4 inch burr mill harness and collars.
Kalamazoo range Florence heating stove reed living
room suite bookcase leather davenport oak bedroom
suite dresser commode rocking chairs table and chairs
cupboard oil stove and other articles.
Sale to begin at 12:30 P. M.
This is the first time in the mem
ory of the people of the community
that there has been no store in the
village and it is being sorely missed.
It is rumored that the store will be
rebuilt since the Lentz’s new home
next to the store is nearly completed
and ready for occupancy. The loss
is partially covered by insurance.
Our Want-ads bring results.
D. C. BIXEL, O. D.
Citizens Bank Bld*., Bluffton
Office Hours: 9:00 A. M.—5:30 P. M.
Evenings: Mon.. Wed., Fri., Sat. 7:30 to
8:30 P. M. Closed Thursday Afternoon.
Paul E. Whitmer. Agent
245 W. Grove St.—Phone 350-W
_________ Bluffton. Ohio
Auct., Leonard Gratz Clerk, Arthur Weaver
These great industries the largest
among them being the steel, motor
vehicle, rubber, machinery, and meat
packing industry—directly or indirectly
affect us all. They give jobs to people
we know, utilize the services of thou
sands of others, use the produce of our
State, pay taxes—and provide the things
we, our armed forces and our Allies need.
We who keep Greyhound buses rolling
across our State take pride in the indus
trial achievements of our fellow citizens
of Ohio and take part in them too!
Our job is a big one—transporting Ohio’s
manpower to factories, foundries and
farms, keeping essential wartime travel
on the move, making near neighbors and
good neighbors of all the communities
our buses serve in Ohio.

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