The register., April 12, 1860, Morning, Image 1

About The register. (Monroe, La.) 185?-1861

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Mexico.
The condition of Mexico since the war with
tills country has been pitiable in the extreme.
Civil war has for over ten years pervaded the
whole land. The scenc has been one of con
fusion and anarchy, a chaos in which chance
seemed to reign the sole umpire. The only
exception seemed to be the success of the youth
ful leader Miramon, to whom fortune has been
more partial than to the cotemporary Mexican
generals.
This state of intestine feuds has been a source
of embarrassment to our Government, and of
serious damage to American citizens in Mexico.
Bands of outlaws and robbers have attacked
and murdered our people, and even invaded
tho frontier. Tribes of predatory Indians have
traversed the northern boundary of Mexico,
and rendered the neighboring Territories of
the United States insecure through their incur
sions. Property and life have been at the dis
posal of the military leaders in temporary as
cendancy, or the prey of the robbers and sav
ages in the more distant portions of the coun
try. The hesitation and indecision of the
American Government to afford protection to
our citizens and restore quiet to Mexico, have
been the cause of well-grouudcd complaint.—
The capture of two vessels belonging to one of
the belligerent factions in Mexico, has at last
engaged the United States directly in the
utruggle. The rubicon is past, and war seems
inevitable ; its results cannot be doubted, and
the destiny of Mexico will again depend on the
determination of the United States.
If abandoned to herself "Mexico would pro
bably succumb to monarchy in some form.—
Either Miramon would follow the example of
Iturbide or Santa Anna, or would invite a Eu
ropean Prince to plant a dynasty on this con
tinent. Either course would be most injurious
to American interests, and opposed to the set
tled policy of the country. Oil the other hand,
there are peculiar objections to the exercise of
a qualified protectorate over a dependent neigh
bor, especially by a Government like ours.—
The only alternative is the annexation of the
whole of Mexico, the extension of our laws
over her territory, and the reception of her
people to the privileges of American citizen
ship. That such a course would be beneficial to
Mexico in the highest degree admits of 110
doubt, and it would heal the wounds of civil
war, place commerce ou a sure footing, and
enable the inhabitants to develop tho resources
of one of the richest regions on earth. It may
be premature to call for annexation, but it is
manifest destiny, and our increasing popula
tion will fit us to sustain the task of regenerat
ing Mexico by an infusion of new blood, and
better social and political institutions.— Ex.
Tlie EKpcdiiit'iii to China.
The strength of the force intended for the
third war with China is to consist, so far as
England is concerned, of eleven regiments of
infantry, each 1,000 strong, that is of 11,000 ;
of 200 European cavalry ; of seven batteries of
European artillery from India, and one Arm
strong battery from England, say 800 men ; of
three companies of European engineers, 300
men ; of three battalions of marines, 3,000
men ; of a-like number of sailors to serve on
land, 3,000 ; of five battalions of native infant
ry of Bengal, each 800 strong, or 4,000 men ;
of three battalions Madras and Bonbay, each
1,000 strong, or 3,000 men; of 300 nativ
cavalry ; of one battery of native artillery, 100
men ; and 200 native sappers and miners. The
English portion of the allied army will then
consist of 18,300 Europeans and 7.000 natives,
or a total of 25,900 men, and adding to thi,
10,000 French infantry and cavalry, and say
half as many marines and sailors as the English
contribution to the allied force, or 3.000, and
the total expedition will amount to 38.900, ex
clusive of the allied navy, the base of operations
lying out of sight of the coast. According to
common report this armada is to proceed to
Northern China, and to effect a lauding on the
coast of the metropolitan province of the Em
pire, which alone contains a population of 30,
000,000, or more than that of the United King
dom of Great Britain and Ireland. If Pekin
should be the destiny of the Allied army the
distance from the nearest point of tho coast is
one hundred miles by roads, or rather paths,
never trodden by an European soldier. To make
this long march it has no adequate means of
land-transport, nor the remotest possibility of
obtaining it. A miracle, therefore, observes the
London Examiner, would alone convey it to
Pekin, and if it got there, success and defeat
would be equally disastrous, the first involviu,
the overthrow of theChiuese Government, with
the necessity of long occupation and perhaps
of annexation, and the last the destruction of
the Allied army. But whether on the coast of
Pekin or in the capital, the army, should it
tinue in Northern China but six short months,
will have some severities of climate to
counter. It will begin with a fine summer end
ing in torrents of rain and cycloids, and thi:
followed by a winter of Siberian rigor, when
the thermometer falls occasionally in January
to ten degrees below zero. The natives of Bri
tain njust be well clothed and sheltered to put
up with this, and those of India, who never see
ice above a sixpence thick on a sheltered pud
dle, must perish under it. The expedition will
be under the direction of two diplomatists, two
generals, and two admirals, and if the
their harmony will be wonderful.— Xational
Intelligencer.
D istinguished C ompliment .—By late Intel
ligpnee from Paris we learn that our distin
guished countryman, J oiin L athiiop M otley
of Boston,.author of the •• History of the Rise
of the Dutch Republic," has been chosen Cor
responding member of tho French Institute,
l the department known as the Académie des
Sciences Morales et Politiques, and iu the place
nade vacant by the lamented death of Mr.
t'rcscott. The work which has so promptly
secured for its author this literary honor has
become extensively known in Europe. Besides
several English editions, there is a translation
into trench, edited by M. Guizot ; an
translation into French iu Belgium, and
translations into Daich and into German.
ther
alio
T
SAMUEL BAKD,
official -paper of the parish of ouachita.
vol. x.
monroe, la., thursday morning, april 1 2, isfio.
EDITOR.
no. 20.
Tlie Trouble at 3Iesilla.--Order
ltestored.
The St. Louis Republican has a letter dated
Mesilla, Arizonia Territory, March 19th, in
which the writer gives the following account
of the recent trouble at that place, etc., etc. :
" Sincel last wrote you, scenes of nn exciting
character have occurred in our usually quiet
town, arid I have purposely delayed writing
you thus long, that I might be able to give you
not only a calm and dispassionate account of
the difliculty / but also the result of it, upon
our community.
No person could for a moment suppose that
a f rontier town of the importance of Mesilla. if
destitute of bad men. We have them litre,
Americans as well as Mexicans, and it is with
this class of people that the troubles occurred.
An American gambler and a Mexican first star
ted the difficulty, the American pulling the
Mexican's hair. The fellow then went off, pro
cured a pistol, and shot at the American. Sev
eral shots were fired in the melee, and only one
person was injured, a woman, who was killed
dead while quietly passing through the plaza.
That night a portion of the American popu
lation (principally gamblers) armed themselves
and marched through the streets, killing what
ever Mexicans they chanced to meet, During
the night some five Mexicans were killed; their
only offense, seemingly, was to have been un
fortunate enough to be Mexicans.
As several influential persons were killed,
(all Mexicans,) the people naturally felt indig
nant, and at one time I believe at least 300
Mexicans were under arms in the Plaza. Under
these circumstances, it was deemed advisable
to apply for aid; and accordingly application
was made to Lieut, llowland, commanding Fort
Fillmore, for a company of troops. lie prompt
ly dispatched Lieuts. Cogswell and Frank, with
seventy-four men, to our aid. The troops
campccl near town; their appearance was the
signal for a general stampede among the gam
blers, who left town soon jifter the troops ar
rived. This allayed the excitement greatly,
and in a short time everything became quiet.
During the difficulty one Prefect, by request,
resigned, and our people appointed two Provi
sional Prefects, one an American, Dr. L. S.
Owings, the other a Mexican, Don Yjnacio Or
rantia, one of the most popular Mexicans we
have. Under their rulc'peaco and order have
been once more restored, and as very nearly
all the gamblers have left town, for good, the
most desirable possible end has been accom
plished. It will be the aim of our authorities
in future to keep this class of mcn-from among
us. Iu fact warrants have been issued for a
great many, and if found here, they will re
ceive no mercy from our people,"
About the Size of Farms.
An old Roman story says: " A certain vine
dresser had two daughters and a vineyard.
When his eldest daughter was married, he gave
lier a third of his vineyard, and raised as much
on what ho had left, as he had raised on the
whole. When his youngest daughter was mar
ried he gave her half of what remained, and
the product of his vineyard remained undimin
ished.'' This was the result of his bestowing as
much labor on the third part as lie had been
accustomed to perforin on the whole. A great
majority of farmers would profit by the exper
iment of the old Roman. As a general rule w
need smaller farms. All will agree that
small quantity of land, when properly cultiva
ted, will produce as much as double the quan
tity impïoperly or poorly cultivated. W T e have
heard farmers owning as high as a hundred
acres of tillable land, say that their lands
didn't pay. and that they must have more land
cleared. Let us louk at his farm, and we will
sSI clumps of bushes growing up in tho fence
corners, around slumps and in open fields,
growing and gaining ground every year. Iiis
fences arc dilapidated and going down ; galet
and barn doors are propped up, and an ap
pearance of carelessness and neglect pervade.'
the whole farm. He has no time to fix these
things up. for he must work in his charing. No
wonder his farm don't pay! He neglects to
tend properly what he already has, in his hurry
to get new ground ready fur wheat, or corn, a:
the case may be. If, instead of clearing so
much land, ho would properly cultivate what
he has, he would find it would pay him, not I
only iu a pecuniary point of view, but in the
improvement and appearance of the place. —
Instead of trying to extend the area of his
acres, he should try to increase the products of
them. Farming is a science, and can be stu
died with as much piofit and pleasure as any
other science, and it should be done.
If a man can stock and carry on a farm pro
perly, making the soil yield its greatest capaci
ty, there can be no objection to him adding
acre after acre, and thus securing the advanta
ges which a large farm has over a smaller one.
The size of tho farm should always be propor
tioned to the capital invested, otherwise it
won't pay. Let us labor to " improve and adorn
what we already have."
T lie II ero of the F iuut in tue G ci.f .—The
Philadelphia Press, noticiug the news fron
the Gulf, says:
Captain Thomas Turner, of the United State.'
sloop-of-war Saratoga, a citizen of Penn
sylvania, (his family now residing in Philadel
phia), led in the attaet on corsair. 1 " !
one
of the last men to act without orders or with
out full reflection and ample provocation. Ile
is, although attached to a warlike branch of
the public service, in every sense of the word,
a christian gentleman, an active and conscien
tious member of tlie Episcopal church, and a
man of tlie strictest moral deportment. No
officer in the navy is more thoroughly versed
in maritime law, or more familiar with current
events.
T ooth- D rawing in S pain .—A recent traveler
in Spain describes an itinerant dentist, in the
public square at Cadiz, to whom a patient, in |
the shape of a pain-stricken muleteer, came, j
...... r • , m 1
griping at bis jaw fer assistance. 1 he grave,
Cinack üid not dismount, hardly stooped in Iiis !
saddle, but, with one experienced, far-sighted
keen glance at tlie cavernous tootb, drew a
. ™ , , ... . , ■ , , . ,
long Toledo rapier, with a curious twisted steel
hilt, that bung liv his Fide, slipped the point
under the muleteer's black fang, and scooped
it out with a singl, twitch. With military pre
...
cision he wiped his sword, slipped it back into,
its sheath, held out his hand for the two-penny
fee, touched his hat and rode gravely away. "
J J
* **•»*-*
The principles of the Bible, broadcast among
the nations, arc the seeds of their moral reno
ration—the elements of their delivery from'
the dominion and the miseries of sin.— K ey . J.
H a wes,
Patent Office Agricultural Report
The last Report from the United States Com
missioner of Patents embraces many elaborate
treatises in regard to the treatment of soils,
crops, and other subjects related to agricultu
ral pursuits. The rapid deterioration of soil
or productive capacity in the older States re
ceived the attention of the "Advisory Board "
of the Patent Office, who recommended iu Jan
uary, 1859, that Congress should provide by
law for tho encouragement of scientific and
practical education in agriculture. In proof
of the success which has attended the efforts of
the Patent Office iu this direction, the number
of agricultural societies in the United States
within the last four years lias increased two or
three fold, while agricultural schools and col
leges arc organizing in different States, with
promise of a race of farmers admirably quali
fied for their avocation. According to tho re
cords of the Patent Office, there* are now in
this country not Air from one thousand boards
and societies eonnccted wholly or in part with
agriculture. In the State of New York there
are 97; in Illinois, 9-1; Indiana, 77; Pennsylva
nia, Ohio, and Iowa, each have about 70.
The Zante current is a crop which promises
well in Florida, Taxas, and California. Andrew
W. McKoe, of San Francisco, writes as follows:
"To the efforts of the Agricultural Division of
the Patent Office, California is indebted for the
introduction of most valuable vines of the
Zante grape, which produces the celebrated
dried currents of commerce. These are grow
ing and thriving exceedingly well—a most sig
nificant fact, when it is said that this variety
of grape is rapidly failing, and great fears ar<
entertained of its total loss, in tho country
where it has hitherto been grown, the islands
of Zante, Cephalonia, &c. Should these fears
be realized, and this grape reproduced and
brought to its pristine quality in California, it
is believed that tho result to this State alone
will tenfold reimburse tho entire appropria
tions for that office. Six hundred and forty
three vessels annually leave the Mediterranean
for tho Atlantic ports, loaded with figs, lemons,
oranges, limes, almonds, and products of the
inc, to the amount of $7,250,000, the total
yield from the Mediterranean, for all countries,
being over $200,000.000. It is merely a ques
tion of time, when California will supply lier
sister States with the above named articles and
still have more to spare." A single result of
this kind is an ample return for all (he expen
diture thus far incurred in the maintenance of
tho Agricultural Bureau.— Journal of Commerce .
Tlie Stuffed Cat.
The Parisian papers tell singular stories,
sometimes ; and in s-ucli a style, loo, that w
aie compelled to believe them. Here is one of
them : Au old rag-picker died, recently, in
Paris, in a state of most abject poverty. Iiis
only relation was a niece, who lived as a ser
vant with a grccn-grocer. The girl always as
sisted her uncle as far as lier means would per
mit, When she learned of his death, which
took place suddenly, she was on the point of
marriage with a journeyman baker, to whom
she had been long attached. The nuptial day
was fixed, but Suzette had not yet bought her
wedding clothes. She hastened to tell her lover
that the wedding must be deferred ; she wanted
the price of her bridal finery to lay her uncle
decently in the grave. lier mistress ridiculed
the idea, and exhorted her to leave the old man
to be buried by charity. Suzette refused-
The cousequcnce was a quarrel, in which the
woman lost her place and lier lovor who sided
with her mistress. She hastened to the miser
able garret where her uncle had expired, and
by the sacrifice not only of her wedding atti
but nearly all the rest of her slender wardrobe,
she had the old man decently interred,
Her pious task fulfilled, she sat alone in her
uncle's room weeping bitterly, when the master
of her faithless lover, a good-looking young
man, entered, "So, my Suzette, I find you havo
lost your place," said he ; " I am come to offer
you one for life. Will you marry me?" "I,
sir? You are joking." "No, faith, I want a
wife, and I'm sure I can't find a better." "But
everybody will laugh at you for marrying a poor
girl like me." "Oh ! if that is your only ob
jection, we shall soon get over it ; come, come
along, my mother is prepared to receive you."
Suzette hesitated no longer, but she wished to
take with her a testimonial of her deceased
uncle—it was a cat he had had for many years.
The old man was so fond of the animal, that he
determined that death should not separate them
for he had her stuffed, and placed her on tin
toaster of his bed. As Suzette took down puss,
she uttered an exclamation of surprise at find
ing her so heavy. The lover hastened to open
the animal, when out fell a shower of gold.—
There were a thousand Louis conccaled in the
body of the cat, and this sum, which the old
man had starved himself to amass, became the
just reward of tho worthy girl aud her disin
terested lover.
IIvimoruoniA and E mpiricism .—The London
Morning Star says:
Some time ago a statement appeared in all
the journals that ten persons had been bitten
by a inad dog at Autlion (Eure-ct-Loire.) The
Jounal de Chartres now announces the death of
the fourth victim, a little girl, who had ap
peared quite well till three or four days back,
when the dreadful malady appeared and car
ried her off in a few hours. The six other per
il t of all danger. The
sons bitten seem to I
same paper then proceeds: -Thirty years a.^o
three persons of that village were bitten by a
mad Two of thom * , Iïd tn a
was said to possess an infiilHMc cure for hydro
phobia, handed down from father to sou foi
SÖPerations. T hey both got well, whlli
the third, who applied to a regular practition
,. r a few (1 ^ s aftcl . TWs fllct ' v a9 Imi
versally known in the country round
and when tho last sad affair occurred, six o
i '.VÎ i" *•" °' t
pine, who now possesses his fatlnr s secret, tin
other four being treated by professional men
The result is that the ?ix survivors are those
who had recourse to the secret remedy, while
the four who have died were treated by the
faculty. VTe cannot explain these fact! *
we cau guarantee their authenticity."
but
The Red Kiver country is reported to
suffering greatly for want of rain. The same
the ca.tc in the EüuJcra portion of Tcxa?.
Sunday Column.
Home I^ife.
If home life is well ortlere'd, the children
having, according to age, working time, play
time, books, games, and household sympathies,
they will love home, and find pleasure there.
Give the little ones slates aud pencils, and
icourage their attempts to make pictures.—
Drawing will amuse them when noisy plays
have lost their zest, or are unseasonable*, and
t will be useful to them in after life.—
Have them read to each other stories and par
agraphs of your selection«, and save the funny
things and tho pleasant ones you see iu papers
and books to read to them at your letsuie.
You cannot imagine how much it will please
them, aud how it. will bind them to you. But
choose well for them: for the impressions made
on their minds now will last when the hills
crumble. Have them sing together, and sing
with them, teaching them songs and hymns: -
Let them sing all day—like the birds--*?/ all
proper times. Have them mutually interested
in the same things, amusements, and occupa
tions; having specified times for each, so that
their habits will be orderly. Let them work
together in the garden—boys and girls—both
need out-of-door work. Together let them en
joy their games, riddles, etc., all their plays,
books, and work, while the parents' eyes direct
and sympathize, aud their loud voices blend in
loving accord,
A Beautiful Extract—Woman.
Oh ! the priceless value of the love of a true
woman! God cannot purchase a gem so pre
cious! Title and honors confer upon the heart
no such serene happiness. In our darkest mo
ments, when disappointment and ingratitude,
with corroding care, gather thick around, and
even the gaunt poverty meuaces with his skel
eton finger, it gleams around the soul with an
angel's smile. Time cannot mar its brilliancy,
distance but strengthens its influence, bolts and
bars cannot limit its progress, it follows the
prisoner into his dark cell and sweetens the
home morsel that appeases his hunger, and, in
the silence of midnight, it plays around his
heart, and in his dreams he folds to his bosom
the form of her who loves on still, though tin'
orld has turned coldly from him. The coucli
made by the hands of a loved one is soft to the
weary limbs of the sick sufiercr, and the po
tion administered by the same hand loses half
its bitterness. The pillow carefully adjusted by
her brings repose to tho fevered brain, and her
words of kind encouragement revives the sink
ing spirit. It would almost seem that God,
coiupassioning woman's first great frailty, had
planted this jewel in her breast, whose heaven
like interest should cast into forget fulness
man's remembrance of the fall, by building up
in his heart another Eden where perrennia!
flowers forever-blooni and crystal waters gush
from exhaustless fountains.-— S tr.vttox.
The Singing: Fish of Ceylon.
Oil the ooension of another visit which 1
made to Batticaloa in September, 18-18, 1 made
some inquiries relative to a story which 1 had
heard of musical sounds, said to be heard issu
ing from the bottom of the lake, at several
places, both above aud below tho ferry, oppo
site the old Dutch Fort; and which the natives
suppose to proceed from some fish peculiar to
the locality. The report was confirmed to mo
in all its particulars, and one of tho spots from
whence the sound proceeded was pointed out
between the pier and a rock which intersects
the channel, two or three hundred yards to tho
eastward. They were said to be heard at night,
and most distinctly when the moon was nearest
the full, and they were described as resembling
the faint sweet notes of the vKoliau harp. 1
sent for some of the fishermen, who said they
were perfectly aware of the fact, and that their
fathers had always known of the existence of
the musical sounds heard, they said, at the spot
alluded to, but only during the dry season, and
they cease when the lake is swollen by the
freshet after the rain. They believed them to
proceed from a sin 11, which is known by the
Tamil name of ( ooric coolooroe cradoc) or tho
"crying shell," a name in which t'so sound
seems to have been adopted as an echo of the
sense. I sent them iu search of the shell and
they returned bringing me some living speci
mens of different shells, chiefly lillorinu and
ccrithium. In tho evening, when the moon had
risen, I took a boat and accompanied the fish
ermen to the spot. Wo rowed npout 200 yards
northeast of the jetty by tho fort gate; there
was not a breath of wind, nor a ripple, except
that caused by the dip of our oars; and, in
coming to the point mentioned 1 distinctly
heard the sound in question. They camo up
from the water like the geutle thrills of a mus
ieal chord, or the faint vibrations of a wine
glass when its rim is rubbed by a wet linger.
It was not one sustained note, but a multi
tude of liny sounds, each clear ami distinct in
itself; the sweeter treble mingling with the
lowest bass. On applying the ear to the wood
work of the boat the vibration was greatly in
creased iu volume by conduction. Tho sounds
varied considerably at different points, as we
moved across the lake, as if the number of the
animals from which they proceeded was great
est in particular spots ; and occasionally w
It
i»t
i\t
of
rowed out of hearing of them altogether, until,
on returning to the original locality, the sounds
were at once renewed. This fact fie
dicatc that, the causes of the sounds, whatever
they may be, are stationary at several points ;
and this agrees with the statement of the natives
that they arc produced l»y mollusca, and not
by fish. They came evidently and sensibly from
the depth of the lake, and there was nothing iu
tho surrounding circumstances to support a
conjecture that they could be the reverberation
of noises made by insects on the shore, convey
ed along the surface of the water, for they were
lend est and most distinct nt those «points where
the nature of the land and tho intervention of
tho fort and its buildings forbade the possibili
ty of this kind of conduction. Sounds some
what similar are heard under water at some
places on the western coast of India, especially
iu the harbor of Bombay. At Caldera, in Chili,
musical cadences are stated to issue from the
sea near the landing place ; they are described
as rising and falling fully four notes, resembl
ing the tones of harp-strings, and mingling like
those at Batticaloa, till they produce a musical
discord of great delicacy and sweetness. The
animals from which theyprocc * have not been
identified at either place, and the mystery re
mains unsolved, whether those at Batticaloa
are given forth by fishes or by mollusccs.— Sir
./. Emerson TmneCs Oy Ion.
T ime am> E ternity .—We step on earth, we
look abroad over it, aud it seems immense- -so
does the sea. What ages had men lived, and
knew but, a portion ? They circumnavigate it
now with a speed under which its vast bulk I
shrinks. But let the astronomer lift up his glass. |
and he learn? to believe in a total mass of mat- :
ter, compared with which this great globe it
self becomes an imponderable grain of dust.—
Aud so to each of us walking along the road
of life, a year, a day, an hour, shall
gr"
older the time
vhen we lift up
to look I k
but,
of years which have rolled over the human j
race, vanish : nto a point ; for then we are i
measuring Time against Eternity.
A generou-. virtuous man. lives not to the I
world, but to his own conscience; lie. as the
planets above, steers a course 'contrary to
: h At of the world. B acon.
Dignity of Character,
The worn dignity is often falsely appreciated.
It is by ulany persons supposed to relate to
that which is grand aud lofty, and is associated
only with the characters and actions of those
who occupy elevated positions in society.—
But true dignity, which is the opposite of mean
ness, belongs to no one condition of life exclu
sively, au 1 it is to be found in the cottage as
11 as in the palace, among the humble and
labouring) classes as well as among the titled
and wealthy of the land.
It is not to be denied, howeve»' humiliating
may be the admission, that many women ami
pspeeialyjto young women we address the«-» re
marks—'pay but little regard to true dignity
i»t character, that their estimate of dignity is
i\t variance with truth, frivolous in its nature
und destructive iu its tendency. Entertaining
the idea that to be dignified one must be proud,
that to ejeeito admiration in others one must
make display of what is not commonly possess
ed, the unhappy victims of these ephemeral de
sires neglect substantial qualities and exhaust
the best energies of life.
To make a display of learning, virtue, relig
ion, generosity, wit, originality, money, proper
• rahk, is incompatible with true dignity
of character.
Faithfully to discharge the duties which de
volve on us, conscientiously to recognise and ful
fill every obligation of our position, to do our
duly in the monotonous and quiet scenes of
practical life, constitutes oue claim to truedig
nity. 1L is only by seeking in youth to devel
ope habits of industry, order, and self-restraint
that we can hope to attain this character, or to
be rendered lit for the trials and duties which
await us.—Life Illustrated.
Memories of the Quarantine War.
Some time ago a good story was published in
the Express, illustrating the strict discipline
practisOd by a soldier of one of our New York
Regiments of the Fourth Brigade. The fol
lowing, which shows the oilier side of the ques
tion, i« told bv an officer who formerly held a
high position in the same corps :
" One day, at the usual time of guard mount
ing, olie of the soldiers agreed with another to
cover liim as his rear rank man, remarking at
the same time that he had got a flask of excel
lent gl|i, which, " be the powers, Pat asthore,"
said he, " 'ill keep the cowld out of our sto
machs when we go on senlhry." Accordingly,
after the sentries'were posted at night, Tom,
which was the name of the man who carried
the spirit ration, left his post and went up to
Pat.
it
I
|
:
Pit, ye devil." said he, " are you there?"
F«ix I am," said Pat, " an' its moself that
ies I was any place else this blessed and ho
ly night."
A|isy," Faid Tom, " I'll soon give you some
thing that 'ill warm the cockles in yer heart.''
Tom accordingly laid down his musket, took
out tlie bottle, and after taking a hearty "swig."
handed it to Pat. Tom's astonishment may be
imagined when Pat informed him that lie was a
prisoner.
" What for, achushla ?" asked Tom.
" What for, is it? 'Pou me sowl. ye seem to
forget that you've committed an awful crime.
Didnft ye lay down yer musket, yerblaggard ?"
" Well, shure, I'll take it up again."
" The devil a take, ma bouehelleen bwe,
( myj little yellow boy,) just lave id there,
darliu', until 1 call the sargent o' the guard."
" Oh ! Put, avourneen, is id In ahnest ye
" Ve may jist whistle that, or sing It, af ye
havtl 111' air of it, Tom, dear."
" Och I Pat, don't. Jist remember our com
pany has never had a man in the guard house
yet, agra, only think av the disgrace."
I can't help that. A man that id lay down
his gun to dhrink gin shouldn't be thrusted wld
one, I must call the sargent."
(Visy now, Pat, darliu'; all the money I have
Ivo dollar goold piece, and I'll give it to
if ye let lue all- only this wan time, Pat,
a hjigar."
" Well, see here now, to show that it's not for
per dirty money I care, I'll let ye all' nn' you
may keep your Y. Give me a howlt o' the bot
tle now."
Tom handed him tlie bottle, and, seizing his
miiBket, returned with great alacrity to his
post.
Tn the meantime Pat drained the bottle, and
wllcn he had finished, left his post aud went
to Tom's.
" Who comes there ?" said Tom.
" Rh— -sh—eh—" said the other, " I've
brought the bottle."
" Hand it here then," said Torn.
Pat laid down his musket, when Tom imme
diately made him a prisoner. In vain he im
plored, and reminded Tom how he " was'nt
hard on him, so he was'nt." It was 110 use
Tom was inflexible. At length a third sentry
interfered, and Tom said—" Very well, I'll let
you off; hand here the bottle."
Pat handed the "crushkcen" to Tom, who
held it up to the moonlight, and found it as
empty as his own head.
" Hillo," said he, " what's this? O ! be the
powers av war, but ye're a prisoner now aud
stakt
" What has he done now?" said the third.
"Done? Enough to have him tried be a
(Soort martial." said Tom.
"Oh! well," said the pcace-maker, ''you
promised to let him off, and an Irishman should
never break his word."
" But, blur an-ouns man, he has committed
two crimen ; didn't he first lay down his mus
ket?"
" Well, you forgev him,"
" Yen, but, be the mortshall, I didn't forgive
Holy St. Pethe
; .Sarious, is id ?
: I belc
hed the gin, am
you, i
rough 11
j
i
I
to
boy. He has fl
an empty bottle."
" The dickens he has. Then, Tom, you must
make him a prisoner. Tho man that id give an
impty bottle to a shinthry, id lake another
man's life."
Just as he spoke the relief came up, and Pat
was marched to the guard-house.
Next day he was punished by not being per
mitted to leave the camp, but the whole story,
as above related, leaked out only a few weeks
ago, and many a hearty laugh hab there been
>iuce at Pat's < xpen .-se.
Tlie Mysterious Cnskef.
Among the annoyances to which people who
judge by the exterior arc frequently subjected,
is that of finding themselves frequently mis
taken iq their estimates of the mass of humani
ty as it reveals itself amid the crowds of a busy
city. Numerous arc tho ludicrous blunders
which havo conic to our knowledge in con
sequence or the too hasty deference of man
kind toward out waul appearances, and no
where is it more extensively developed than on
board tho steamers, where men whose ambition
iu life has never soared beyond t
humble pursuit, often pass, owing to something
distingue in their appearance for Senators,
Governors and what not, until accident re
veals them in their true colors to their fellow
passengers. A ludicrous Instance occurred a
few days since iu an omnibus, of which a dig
nifled gentleman of very saturine aspect and
immaculate clothing was a constant patron.
This gentleman carried, morning and evening
a gold-headed cane and a small tin box with a
handle, In which were supposed to be deposited
large amounts of coin and the secrets of an
important business- impressions which his
supercilious demeanor only strengthened.
One morning, however, the fatal secret leaked
out and all deference was at an end. The gen
tleman had laid his carefully-guarded box upot
his kneesf and was absorbed in the morning
paper, when a couple of pretty ladies entered.
Lifting the casket by the handle as he shifted
his seat, the treacherous lid, which had ac
cidentally been left unlocked, $jtw open, and
out fell—a rouleau of gold? n trousseau
diamonds?jewels- ingots - papers! No tuer
ly two slices of bread and a Bologna sausajj
Since the morning of that important discovei
omnibuses have lost a customer, and the nu
of the supercilious aspect, unless ho conccn
them iu his coat tails or bosom, has given up
tho practice of carrying luuohes to his ofiicc.
lie Alluded to Cows,
In the agricultural districts the operation of
milking cows is called "pulling teats." This
is the preface to our short but affecting story.
The people of S . Portage county, have a
debating focic'y. The other night they dis
cussed the question: "Is the human race in
creasing iu development?" The tchoolhousc
was crowded with young Indies and gentlemen.
One of the dispiHunU for the negative ably
contended that the times wire degenerating
that things were growing "wusa" constantly.
Said he:
Why, what upon airth does the young man
of to-day amount to? Hols feeble In body and
mind, wears fine clothes that his father buys
him, has rings on his fingers and a little hair
on ills upper lip. and tho hardest labor he can
perform is to carry round a meerschaum pipe.
Now. when I was a boy we wore not afraid to
pull teals!' 1
A wild shout greeted this announcement.
The speaker blushed, aud in a faltering voice,
«
it
'aid:
"/ alluded to cars."
That helped the matter
S okn'k B kpouk a G uam» .)i uv. ( I'ntor a «I
consolate looking female, without hoop.».)
Foreman.- Madam, what complaint have y
to make ?
Complainant. I come to enter complaint
agin' my companion.
Fore.—Your husband. I suppose ? Well,
what is his name, ami what has he done ?
Com. —Ills name is Mr. , and he st
me, and beat me, and threw mo "out door,"
and threatened to kill uie if 1 come in the house
again I
Koro. What provocation did you give him,
madam, for such treatment?
Com. 1 don't like to Uli, sir.
Fcro,—But, madam, you mu^t ! Tlie Grand
Jury must know all the circumstances.
Com.—Well, if 1 must, I must. He done it
just 'cause I wouldn't sleep with 'im.
Fore— Ali ! that's the nature of the ease is it?
Very well, why did you refuse to sleep with
him?
Com.—'Cause he was drunk, and I didn't
want to.
Fore.—Well, how is it when he's sober ? Do
you refuse to sleep with him then ?
Com. No, sir; but when he's sober he won't
sleep with me 1
M oumonikm jn tu« (M .n D ominion . Though
it is not generally known iu that sc lion of the
country, the Wheeling ( Vn.) Union asserts that
uu association of Mormons not only exists, lint
nourishes iu one of the sections ot Wheeling.
The Union says :
They have been in successful operation for
about a year, and have succeeded in converting
forty or fifty of the citizens of (hat vicinity to
the strangf! belief. On Sunday, the Cltli tust.,
live new members made an open declaration of
"Joe Smith" principle, and took upon them,
selves the "duties" of Mormonism. by undergo
ing a process of immersion pvbiiüy. They
have an cld«T. and all the ollleiuls pertaining
to the institution, and make it convenient t
entertain traveling sa! i Utah-bound. They
f the Brigham Voting stripe,
arc not. howe
but strictly ot the Jo
sequently cute
1 but <
! wife euch."
ßftr A little boy named George, nged ab
four years, the son or Mr. Georg" G.' Wills
of this parish, was drowned in .lie lake,
front of his father's house, on l e t Tl.ni>«
forenoon, lie had been pbiving with one of
little negro children, by whom'the lirst intii
tionofhisl lug drowned was given. Tho
gro child wi„ too young to be able to give 1
particulars of the melancholy occurrence. '
body of little Oor ■ was found, not long a
the occurrence, floating on tin surfac
water. Every - Hort was made liv
ton. who happened to be at M
the tirna, to resuscitate the body
the vital spark had left it 1
Providence Herald.
>f the!
Dr. Hough-!
Query for Lawyers.
If. in 11 fliindy nr liront,
John I)oo si M four n pire-; I
Jack lino'« uiiim-ntioiinWi y.
Query: In Mich u cusfj us tliif,
AVI, m ^ iw.uld .-ach put bu-.
Should .lin k It'* Mic
l'or a breach of lie: pme
I
the 1
advertising rates.
For one square of ten lines, or less, for first
insertion SI
For each additional insertion, per square 50
Liberal discount made to quarterly
semi-annual aud yearly advertisers.
pti- Steamboat Notices, for the season. .$15
Announcing candidates for c*fice (to 1 e
paid in advance) ...fio
Professional and Business Cards, (not to
exceed six lines,) published twelve months.. $'.0
Cards of a pkksonai . character can only
be published in this paper as advertisements,at
double rates, and paid for in o dwnvt.
Advertisements not nmrke'd on the copy
will be inserted until forbid aud charged ac
cordingly.
Utlle-or-Notliiiigs.
« J map of busy lift-Us fluctuations and its vast
ci)iiccms. v —Cow PK».
T ransporte»» pou I .ikk . The man who mar
ries happily.
When women begin to count their admirers,
it isn't apt to take them long to do it.
The coat of a liorso is the gift of nature.—
That of an ass is oft en the work of a tailor.
Asa man drinks he generally grows reckless.
In his case, the more drams the fewer scruples.
At what time of day was Adam created? A
little before Eve.
An Irish paper advertises,- - ' Wanted, an
able bodied man as washer-worn an."
Win
couldn't Job sleep at night? Ikcauw)
such miserable comforters,
he ha
The studio of a first-rate portrait-painter
must be a perfect bedlam—it Is full of striking
likenesses.
The young woman who was "driven to dis
traction," now fears she will havo to walk buck.
"Von seem walk more erect than usual,
my friend." ' Yes, 1 have been straitened by
circumstances,"
' Can't we make your lover Jealous, miss?"
"Oh yes, sir, I think we oun, if we put our heads
togrther."
A modern tourist calls the Niagara river
"the pride of rivers." That pride certainly hau
a tremendous fall.
T ovo can excuse anything except meanness ;
but meanness kills love, and cripples even na
tural affeotion.
Sho that marries a man because he is a "pood
match," must not bo surprised if he turns out»
"kuoifer."
Who is the thinest servant mentioned In his
tory?—Tho valley (valet) of the shadow of
death.
Why was llerodlas the fmlest woman of her
day ? * lieoause she got a head of John the Bap
tist. on a charger.
Excess of ceremony shown want of breeding.
That civility Is best which excludes ull super
fluous formality.
The love that has naught but beauty to keep
it In good condition, is short-lived, aud subject
to shiveting Ills.
An English missionary now iu Sumatra late
ly wrote homo that he had tho "satlsfacHon" i f
examining the oven In which his predecessor
was baked.
There h a lawyer in Plymouth, Enjrlaud, so
excessively honest that he puts all his How er
po's out over nights, so determined is he that,
everything shall have its dew.
Why i* a man climbing up Mount Vesuvlun
like uii Irbhiuan who wishes to kiss his sweet
heart? Because ho wants to get at the mouth
of the "cratur."
qnitk. IJ .nniaikssvhy. A lady being asked to
join a union of the "PutighlcrH ot Temperance, '
replied : "It is unneoesi-ary, as I Intend to join
one of the Sous, soon." Sensible lad), that.
In literature, as in morals, there are a certain
taste and grace, which confer dignity on mo
derate acquirements; and there uro a negli
gence and gi'vw-sness thai disgust, even when
accompanied with iucontestible superiority.
10very deslro bears its death In Its very grati
finition. Curiosity languishes under repeated
stimulants, and novelties cease to excite sur
prise, until at loiigth we cannot even wonder
at a miracle, Washington Jiving.'
C onhciknck .- "It is a deplorable condition,"
siiys liishop Sherlock, "Iu be always doing w hut
we are always condemning." The reproaches
of others are painful enough; but w hen the Int-li
is laid on by your own hand, the anguish is in
tolerable.
F ashion a n 1,p. C olons . Tt may be interesting;
to our fair render« to know that the color most
iu vogue in the English 1 louse of Lords, on tho
opening of I'nrlinmcut, was mauve, but of a
much lighter tint than w as fashionable lust sea -
son. Next in popularity was pale blue und
white.
A Yankee 1 ditor »ays : "We don't in-ucl re
cording the deaths of people without being paid
for our trouble though that i- s ndt lair; lui t
panegyrics 011 the dead must be paid for wo
positively cannot send people to II« aven for
nothing."
"My son," said an affectionate mother to her
son, (who resided at a distance, aud expected,
iu a short time, to be married.) "you are get
ting very thin." "Yes, mother," lie n pliid, "I
am; when I come next I think you may sec my
"
rib. "
A chaplain was once preaching In a class of
collegians about the formation ot habits, "Gen
tlemen," said lie, "cl0*0 Vour ears against bud
discourses." The students immédiat* ly clap
ped their hands to their cars.
One person abusing another in the prcserirn
of Churchill, the poet, said, "He was so ex
ly stupid, that if you said a good thing
11 Id not understand it." "Play, sir," said
Churchill, "did you ev< 1 try him?"
A man asked nnolher, "Which is the heavl
est, a ijuart fil'giii or a quart of water ?"- -(Jin,
most assuredly, for I saw a man who weighs
two hundred hounds staggering under a quart,
of gin, when he would have carried a gallon of
water with ease."
Won't you /<//.< my word, sir, wlun I tell you
1. will call and pay your bill 011 Saturday morn
ing next?" said a delinquent debtor to a dun
ning creditor, wiili win 111 ln> had had sharp
words. "No, sir." 1» plied the other, "1 had
rather you would hrrp your word,"
The repose of the passions must not Imply
their Hlu r nation. Tiny must rouse themselves
at Imt and go forth, though it I e only to benr
a burden ami be hnflM by defeat. ,Successful
or ha filed, their duly is in the struggle. Tho
Struggle itself, is the life. Simms.
A schoolmaster, who had an inveterate habit
of talking to himself, was asked what niolivo
he could have in doing ko ? I le replied that ho
had two good and substantial reasons, ' I 1
the (ir t place, he liked to talk to a semiblo
man; in the second place, he liked to heal a
si risible man talk."
"Perhaps Brother Jonathan docs carry hh
hands in his pockets," said a drawling Yanki o
iu dispute with an Englishman, "but the ditb 1 -
ence between him and John Hull i : :, that Hro
Iher Jonathan has his hands iu his own pockety,
while John Bull has his iu somebody else's,"
Titer r, a stuavckii . "Jack Is a g cod fellow,
lie for any man. I I.. vu
tU, still more." ' My
but I will not t.'lt m
my fr'h'iul. but 1 lovi
denr," said a by-stai
should you preli r a s
riger to
mow! Win
old aequain
i Last .Sunday, Father B was ndtiiliilutci
! ing baptism to a number of pocket editions <
, humanity. The godfulhep and inothi rs mos
ly Irish while standing' around the charv"
irreverently talked much to each otle r in
loud whispi-r. This annoyed the good lathe
who rebuked them, in the midst of his pray
! as follows : '■<>,. /mus Domine will ve pluse 1
top yer talking; «aire, an ho v can* I pi oca.
itli the
il \ ice; do you
After thi> r» pr
lind.