The Seattle star. [volume], January 06, 1912, Page 4, Image 4

About The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947

Image provided by: Washington State Library; Olympia, WA

                
4
THE SEATTLE STAR
Ph«nea Private K>change Main »400 and taAepandent 441 _
~ Mam bar at Unite* P»u r«»lnh«ll Dally hy The ««ar *üblt»li»af <>*;__
Kutarad"at t»e«tTfiJ 'Waak., po3ofiiy< a* aee.mS du»• mallei
9y tnall. out of rttr. Jo eenta par mouth up la al* month*. 81* nionlhn
«' »tie yenr. I* '» ... —n —
IliTfctflWaTe Tha Seattle KE? Wirt confer a favor b» natlf s lltg «bla
office at anca of any failure to aeeur* prompt ami regular JelIV *r* or
the |amr of an* *lten>|>l lo a\il>attluta another i >i er for The . "a■ I
Star It la the <ieatie of tka management t<> aacura the tw»t "" ..
for all and complaint* are *t*en couit«ma and prompt attention
your paper failed to arrive any night by « o rl.« U .'jV'flii tion imoart
offlce at anca. Main »4»0 ar lad. 441. A*k for the Circulation U*part
went. __ —■—
Dignity or Bust!
Here am a few kind word* for the m»r—lb«l part of our glortou*
fcgvy that wrara Tiu.xUw and thoac cuta Wttia *»'»»* *"«»
when It lan't wegrlng medal*. braaa button* and »ttr» on-duty frown*.
W# rofer to "the h'sht-r ranking official*," like admiral* and n»»r ad
tulral*. captain* and rear captain* and auch.
Secretary of the Navy Mrjrtr ahow*, In hi* animal report, that a
|ri>H outrage haa long Iwb ptrpstratwl »i*hi our "hlsher ranking
offlcem." tn that, when they were In port and wanted to uphold the
rtlgnltv of the nation before the higher ranking eye* of other officer*,
they've had to pay for the pate de fole gra». glare meringue and
rhamp»Kne oat of lh< Ir own pockct*. Meyer propone* to r»lle»« oar
overworked higher ranking officera of thla craaa burden by giving
each higher rauker a fixed »um--of oat tuoney- to dmw on for "official
entertainment*,"
Mr. Merer * scheme haa aome beauty, at flrat glance, but wouldn t
he be overatralnlng the higher ranker*? Wouldn't drawing their pay
and drawing (Mr appropriation* for "entertainment" be too much
labor? Oh. we're not kicking about the vitra money. We're got to *hoot
our dignity into warlike foreign higher ranker*, but wouldn't It bo Judl
clou* to *pread the labor of drawing thow filed *ura» around a bit?
Why not let the gunnera. aiokera aud common aeameu draw.lt, and
laveet It In better food and drink and cloiheg? We might bit the king
P»n of dignity by letting all theae common men dreo* like higher rank
era, dor Inatanoe, and not [>ut (ha oner >u* burden of upholding the dig
nity wholly upon the poor officer*
Great Coup for Cousin
Cousia BIU Taft baa not a mighty flu# chance to make II hole* at
one putt in the political golf flame, and we propose that be shall not
overlook it by reason of luat loot ion on our part.
Consln'a opportunity Ilea in bla filling Justice llarlsu's place oa
tho If. 8, supreme bench ibrewdly. I*el htm appoint Mob La Kolletle.
It could be claimed aa a step toward peace In bia party with an element
that ia ai]re!) after Ulll'a bide, and Hill could declare that he isn't
throwing every tbtug to tho Mr Business <-ab«l. aa ia charged
Of course. Ia Pbllette might go to showing up the constitutional
greenness and uaurplnx procHvltlea of that aolld bunch of ex-corpora
tioa-fed lawyers on the bench. Juat an Harlaa did. but that wouldn't
hart "boataeaa lateresta" much ti tahea Ave Judaea of that bench to
do things. and the five Would atlll he there Aicata. It woald—La
FWlette willing;—remove Bob aa a presidential possibility, and we're
afraid that such a possibility ia going to make Hill sweat more thaa
one night lons during the next six months.
We charge Cousin Bill nothing fur this pointer. W» simply hate
Vo see him worrying nnd posing and nlbblicklng for a two-Inch hot*,
whoa an axcavaUon big enough to receive a dead mul« la awaiting tba
UtL
Wasted Energy
Somebody said oace that the only really wicked thing in the world
was wasted energy.
A steeplejack recently took a risky Jump which would have meant
• fall of 2M feet to death If he hod missed the landing, and be did It
Jaat to prove that be waa greater than another "Jnek."
Mrs. Clerlt Brown spends three hour* to rigure out how she can
save moaey enough from bar bouse allowance to buy a willow plume
Ilka the an Mrs Banker Petti John wears Mr Teeter-Toot er wastes
a* hoar explaining to bia wife where ha waa last night, when ha
known that abe knows an the time
The autoiaobillat would outspeed his neighbor at the risk of hla
own and others' Uvea: the aeroptanlat would soar higher than the
birds, la face of almost certaia death: the stroag man would lift a
■renter weight thaa hla fallows caa; tbe acrobat would attempt a more
aaclting aad dangerous stunt than his rival dares
If all the aaelaaaiy expended mental and physical energy In tbe
world could ha gathered together and used for the betterment of the
world, ail the "laws" aad "oiogW could go oat of business.
False bat Necessary
Wisconsin supreme court's decision thai a husband la legally
>OMi to pro ride his wife with false teeth. If the requires them to est
properly, is aonnd and sensible She has certainly got to sat. and sho
should be able lo ear properly.
The same sppllea to false eyes, fstse noses, false hair and ffelse
*Wtapsa" for her figure. You needn't sneer. Mr. Man. because these
things don't look to yon Hke necessities Your're Ignorant, You aim
ply don't know what women's necessities are. This la the age when
VMBan ia getting more and more of the thlnga that are hers and (o
say that she shsll not be entitled to number of "fslse" things simply
because they are not positive and vital necessities Is like ssylng that,
toothless. she aSonld get along by talcing her food through a quill or
• sponge, sad M gentleman will say that.
li the Farm Trust Coming
"Farmer* must pot business Into farming, or business men will
pat farming Into business."
This eptgrsmmstic chunk of philosophy la ottered by Hurt Hall of
Ohlcago. secretary of the Council of Orain Kxehanges. Hers la J tut
What he means:
The ratio of production to consumption Is steadily decreasing
More snd more, the fanner ia fsUlng to meet the demand we make
Spon him for the raw materials of our food supply.
He raw only meet the demand by "putting biiHltwMs into farming."
bp which Is meant the adoption of the highest methods of efficiency in
Swery department. - *
One of Life's Little Mysteries
Ttila ta a true bill of what once happened to a cub reporter.
This cub waa "doing roarketa" on an evening paper published In
Ae capital etty of a certain North Central state
(Incidentally, be waa
dotag tbla at K a week )
He lived tn a little back
room In an unpretentious
private house and took
bla meal* at the Busy Bee
lunch counter. Hy limit
ing bla breakfaat to 10
centa, and bla aupper to
Is, and by cutting out hla
dinner altogether and hav
ing bla laat summer's ault
dyed a guaranteed faat
black, be managed to «ka
out a sort of an existence.
He had been at work
but a fortnight. He wai»
practically a stranger In
the town. He bad met
nobody outalde tboee he
Kaw at the office and In
the commission house* be
vialted on hla beat So
far aa he knew, hardly
half a doxen people out
alde thla narrow circle of
men knew of bla exlatence.
Then be came home late
one night, after baring
covered tome little night
to lie hy
the landlady with the amazing Information that a "beautiful young
lady" bad nailed for him earlier in the evening He said It waa Impos
sible that any beautiful young lady should call for blm, but the landlady
Insisted. No, there waa no mistake about It. She had called for him
and asked for bim explicitly, naing Ma first name. Bbe had gonu away
Without leaving any meaaage.
That waa all there waa of tbe Incident. Nothing further developed
In that regard. The girl went Into the night, The cub reporter wont
•B doing the markets.
Presently the cub reporter was promoted to the government build
lag beat. And after a while he was fired and then he began to drift
from city to city and rrom deak to desk Now he happena to be pound
ing the typewriter that types these words.
And so tbe years have paaaed.
And to thla day the girl who called tor him that night remains a
profound mystery to that cub reporter. He has no glimmer of an
Idea as to who she was He doesn't know whether It was tba Hklrt
of Romance that touched his life so lightly that night, or merely that
•f the commonplace—say the aklrt of a book agent. He only knows
that she called for him, that the landlady vowed she was beautiful—
and further than that he knows nothing at all.
And, of course, be never will know anything further than that
about It now, for this Is one of life's little mysteries of a peculiar,
whimsical order—one of tbe Jokes that Chance plays upon each of us
•ace or twice In a lifetime, perhaps—the pith and point of such Jokes
lying In the fact that of tbe utter Insolubility of tbe problem that Is pro
pounded.
OUTBURSTS OF EVERETT TRUE
WOULDN'T HAVB RECOGNIZED IT
Man (mpph lug for a Job)—Blr, I kin honesty Itself.
I'roopeetlve Km ployer—lndeed' I Imagoatde M looked different—
tloitn Kvenlng Transcript
PURE THEORY
"What ever became of Dobson? lftdn't ha study medicine?"
"Tea; but be doesn't seom to be making a practice of It" —Bmart
Sat Magaaine.
JEALOUS NATURE
"A fireman la no spark for me"—
The words were pretty Mame's—
**I rouldal keep the lad. you sea.
Away from other flames"
—Boston Traaacript
THE DEPTHS OP MISERY
Oowacaat Alaskan Prospector I jaat ain't got tbe boart t* dig.
'cause with every ounce o gold I takea out o" the earth, I decraaae the
pure basin power of the dollar!— Puck.
NOT ALWAYS LOADED
Oabbleigb—They aay that language ia the vehlcta of thought, yoa
know.
Keeae—Tea, but a lot of Umaa It travels empty —Boston Evening
Transcript.
DOUBTFUL COMPLIMENT
"Was mimU gi,«. ■ >n iU»,
amateur tlnHtrieal*T" ■'
"Wall, lb* audience applauded i
wtWljr when ah* died." '
SHE WAS wise
I i>ro|H>tiß(l to her last nlKht, «he
•aid 'no,' and I said Rood night.'"
"Foolish bojr. Don't you know
that yon muit ne*er take n woman'*
'no' for an answer."
NO DANGER FOR HIM
"Some aclentiata claim a $10 bill
will accumulate 89,000 microbe* In
two wooka."
"Don't worry me any. 1 never
have one long enough for It to ac
cumulate more than six or leven."
THE STAR. SATURDAY, JANUARY fl, 1911
MItUNOERETOOO
"li »*«» you juiU your hunbend
eeve r had any epata?"
My husbsnd baa a pair, but 1
wouldn't wear the nasty ihlnn"
NOT LIKE MCR
"Does your little daughter take
after your wife?"
"No. Why. abe's nearly 3 years
old and *he can't aay more than
(;lght or ten worda."
OP COURSE
Mr. Newwnd—What have you
been trying to make?
Mrs. Newwed (tearfully)—Aufrel
cuke, but It wouldn't rise.
Mr. Newwed —Ah! a fallen af&el
cake, eh?
SEMOHSI#
JOSH WISE
•AVt:
"Ort ft Ida.
muah la aa elum
ay he'd bark Ma
ahint againat a
Atake In th* mid-
Site of a ten-acre
not-"
Now (hat I hoy ha»e mapped the
air ourrenta for a«roplanee, the
text thiol wr will h«ar of I* pat
■t raedklne also* poeted along :be
iMH.
Dla* ha» ordered ten mortar bat-
Srlea. The ln*u/g«uta will ion
ma to throw hlin the hrlrka.
J Kt-Hoea Croker*a |*ma of advloa
qpou how to run our cltlaa do »oth
ill mora than ramlud ua that ba
ftuuliln't lake our advice on how to
run a city, either.
Th«r have a plan to Illuminate
Drul'i lomb with eleotrlo lighta.
Hi ran iter* nwhing New York on
tha ferry wIU think It la one of the
38 U»< atrea.
Ilarsh male earth being declare*
the auffraget ahould wear ft mark
%- which she tan be known. It <•
%o at present She wear* a spring
hat
Men resemble the goda in noth
ing ao much ft* in doing good io
their fellow creature*.--Cicero.
Our of the mriillit mayor* Just
elected la a millionaire. Another la
• preacher, And one ewtallat who
*aa nearly elected mayor la a pro
hibit lon UL Tea year* ago people
thought the aortal)*!* war* a hobo
party.
Wall, now. they know why la the
Hphlni. It la i portrait of Cheph
ran. oee at tba Pharaoha The noit
ancicnt riddle to bo solved la, "flow
*l<i la Ann?"
Ko<«ev*lt Mr* tba OrorrMl
Should be driven out of Reno So
lk*y ll*. Theodora, ao they ara—
kh soon aa they ara gl*«»n a decreo.
Sud to bmUio fool (or tba Mtt
iralnload.
A ■rain Teaeer
"! km « imt circulation build
er for your magazine," cried tba
brlak yo«ng man wbo entered tba
office of tba Hlghbrowe Monthly
"What Is It? Out wltb It. man,"
org fid tba editor, eagerly.
"Offer prlaoa to nadura wbo can
guess what tba muiae poetry la
aHottt."
NO 0000
"I don't believe la ftrclnf acboola
Cor child ran." Mid Governor Wood
row Wilson at a dinner In Trenton.
"A child that know* at 4 a* much
aa ordinarily It would kaow at t.
It., to my mind, about aa useful an
Objeet aa Calhoun Clay's watrh.
" "That's a fine watcb you've not
tlx-re. Calhoun." aald a friend. 'la
It a Rood goer?"
"'A good goer?" aald Calhoun
flay, "Well, you bet your life It'*
a good goer. Why, it can do an
hour in half the time.'"
* Much Out of Little *
* The lady How much milk *
* doe* the old cow give a day, *
* Torn? *
* Tom—About eight quarts, *
* ma'am. " *
* The lady—And bow much #
* of that do you aellT *
* Tom—About twelve Quarts, *
* ma'am. —Sketch. *
* *
'%
Natursl
Traveler (In Nevada) —What
seema to be the matter with this
train?
Conductor—Trouble with the
couplings, sir. You see, we ere
coming into Reno. —Philadelphia
Record.
Qsvs Him s Jsr
"Am I required to eschange wed
ding gifta in tbo department from
which they were purchased T"
"Not at all," said the floor
walker.
"Thank you. I would like to ex
change a rose Jsr for a frying
,I)an "—Washington Herald.
_____
A Knockout
Wife (complalnlhgly) — You're
like Mr. Knagg. They've been
married twenty years, and Mm
Knagg says her husband is so
tender.
Husbsnd—Tender! Well. he
ought to be, after being In hot wa
ter that long.—Zlon's Herald.
Just as Deadly
"But thst dueling Is against tha
law, I would challenge the scoun
jdrel to mortal combat!"
k' Why don't you challenge him to
o hunting with you?"— Boston
Drawing Contest Closes™ Next One Is About Pets
The drawing conteat for U»la weak
rloaed iaat ulKht. A keen Interest
waa displayed by the Circle'* young
arllat member*, and their ability ol
penning wa» surprising. Grace
Lovelace of AiliiiKtoo. Wa*h,, waa
the winner Her prin baa beea
mailed to her.
Neat Conteel
What'* your favorite pet, whether
you hat" one or not* Maybe It'a a
dog. rat, rabbit, chicken or now*
other dumb creature Why do you
like thl* particular one the beet*
[Got a good r*aaon? Well, the aend
[era of the be»t three reaaona will
each get a prlie.
Give a good reason for your lov
ing of aoMn- pet; a good reason why
ihi* oertalq one make* the beat pet
of all, and your chancoft are good
letter* lauat be reeelred by next
KVtday.
HONOR ROLL.
Ida Ruppert.
tva Kxapp.
Margaret lowiit.
GortriKi* Wtdlwnd-
Willi* Johnson.
Hacal Platnar.
El«*nor Dober.
Thelm* Hoberson.
Henrietta Hawfclna.
Lenore ScHosnheir.
Ruth Bartlett.
Lily Hempel.
M*r«u*r<tt* Landla.
Cecilia Brit*.
Oscar Johnaen.
Aivln •jornton
Clarence OullahanL
Ruth HawcK.
**************
* *
* ATTENTION! *
* Will Inei l.ln twall please *
* aend Untie Jack her addreee *
* Immediately. *
* *
IEU THIS
Dear Uncle Jark—l am ft little
girl • year* old and am In the
Fourth grade I have a little
brother and *l*t*r younger than 1.
We lire I* mile* from Seattle, not
far from the Bnoqualrale fall*. We
Ure on a ranch of IM acreft. We
bare St cow* and S horse*. Dairy
ing In what all the |i«ople here do.
My little brother and 1 would like to
Jol* the Circle
Tour little nleee,
TIIKI.MA HALVKRSON.
Stillwater, Wash.
I>ear Uncle Jack—l received the
chock you sent for my Christmas
letter and I am sure there are some
that would like to thank dear
Uncle Jack for the help It brought.
I thank you for the cheek, hut, oh.
Uncle Jack, I thank you ten ttmea
more for the encouraging letter you
aent me. I am aondlng you my pio
ture. Wlahtng you and all the
nleoee and nephew* many Happy
New Years.
Tour loving nlccc,
MAItY MONAQIiB.
Buokley. Wash.
How About ItT
"Are you sure Harry love* you,
4Mrf
"Well, he lets me eelect bta cra
vats." —Ualtlmons Evening Sun.
roa MOV*
A hOi»IHIM
The Star
The frit* Drawing
SENDS THANKS
MARV MONAQLE
A KUu<J cluld, a uuod child,
A* ! suppose you'll tx*.
Will never nor smile,
Al the tickling of the knee.
GARVIN'S CORNER
■V REV. JOSEPH L. GARVIN. B. 0., M. A. i
Ptilw of the First Chrialian Church, Seattle. J
I AM FOR OROA
I AM SURPRISED that we
haven't beard mora about the ad
Area* of Mr. J. C. Higglnt, given
at the Ad Club dinner last Tuesday
noon It contained a massage **•
el? Bvattlelte should read.
THE CHAMBER OF COMMERCE
might ad varr.igfously make It a
publicity pamphlet Ageaucles ex
ploiting the city would do well to
distribute It widely.
•. L. SWEZEA stirred up a hor
net'a neat of enthusiasm when b«
loosened the I'otlatrb Hue among
the buaineaa men When a loan
*pa res no *xp>-n*e to make concrete
an idea which when crystallued
helps a
CITV MiOHTILV, ha deserves sp
prwtstion. After the glowing pos
ter* have fa lud and the song* and
doing* are but lingering memories,
thts brief, scintillating, truth ham
merlng. Man-rousing talk, with Ita
DAGGER SENTENCES, will con
Una* to reveal Seattla'a true re
source* and greatness to the mind*
of *11 who beard It
IT IS RINGING In my ears yst.
It fit* the clever slogan of the Ad
Club—Ore*ailed Optimism. When
optimism has such a basis as our
city then it must express itself in
an organised way.
"HOW FOOLISH to the peaal
"You don 4 know my brudder Kmll. don'd you, Osgar?"
"Ferry veil, indect —I nefer wui acquaint et rait Un. Im Ml'
der «oa rich has* a face like a f!sh~*
"Ye»», dot In der Ton. Veil. I rant to tell you aboudt bte-fc>
looked ad him drough a plate glass vlndow der tider day, nod I look MB
lor a aquarium "
SOUTHERN REPUBLICAN DELEGATES
ARE IN THE MARKET AGAIN, SAYS
GILSON GARDNER.
BY GILSON GARDNER
KNOXVIM.K. Tenn.. Jan 5 —The republican party of the SwWf
(there Is allied to be such a thing) has been heard rrom; that to. !■*
of it hna.
Some enterprising dealers In the commodity known as the
era republican delegate have actually Journeyed all the way U> W«toK
ingtoti and made their offers to tile manager* of La Kollette'l cs»
paign. They are quite frank about the thing.
"It will coat you about $1,200 for a detonation from my state," Mil
one man. "We can give you just an good a delegation aa anybody**
There will be another delegation, of roursc but ours will be aa «***
as tlielra."
Another man who trades In Southern delegates put the need M
money on another ground.
"We have some papers that are weak," ho said. "and moaey
be needed to help them along."
Money Is required. «Iko, for the rent of halle In which the «*
ventlons are held, for printing bnllota and credentials, and, most !•
portant, for railroad fare and hotol bills for the delegate*.
expenses Jjuve In past years always been paid for Southern
by Home candidate
There Is no real republican party in the South. The Soutk <#
tributes only a trifling vote to the republican nominee for prerfWjf j
anil it is a hoary scandal and n dismal farce that there should IM
thinu* In a republican national convention as Southern delegate*. jg J
The federal officeholders are the nucleus for what pretense
Is of a republican party in the South. The |*>*tmasters, intend BR
en tie officers, collectors of customs, the marshals, the officers efJP
federal, courts and the federal Judges themselves—all holding *®J
and drawing government salaries by grace of the man who chßMg
to be president—this is the republican party of the South Their MJ
their orders from the White House—or from the Frank Hltchefldjtv
whatever administration happens to be In power—they call convwWß
to which they name the membership and these conventions na®* ■§
delegates who travel to the city where the national convention to :
and there take part, as if they were representing genuine votereflf"
genuine party.
Therefore, a great majority of these Southern republican d*W>BI :
are merely a company of mercenaries.
lint mercenaries are unreliable at best. They go where P r **
calls them. if no one bids a higher price, they are liable to
bought, but that all depend*. is
So that I* the altunUon which I find In the South. The Sootkjw
mercenaries are wavering. The officeholders can't afford to com* B»
the open and break with Taft'a administration. They would to** B
Jobs which run from now on to March 4, 1913. But they are hopßl
they will not be called upon to make the sacrifice required by I*2
renomlnatlon They have their eyes on the running of their Job* f
log the following; four years.
EAST AND WEST
Lapla—What Is It make* the Weat wild? Jfe
hamuli—lt In the lmpn-aaian In the Ktut that the Welt la
i/oula Foat-Dlspatch.
THE WRONG MAN
"Juat a minute, old chap. You're Just the man I want to Hfc"
"No, I'm not I can't apare a wnt."—Washington Herald. —
- ■ - ■ - - —
STAR WANT ADS BRING RESULTS
Circle
NIZfcO OPTIMISM
m st. d-«imnd«at sad forte**, *tt
always when b* gets a rot* Ml
hunting for the thorn." It mm
that some of our cUXmnu haw* km
seeking misery where It eaew*||
ORGANIZED OPTIMISM ag
that there are many paotM af flff]
•arne kind, and It la gooi kf
'with them. They ars the serf I
the city, l.ike Kaiser wnMk(fj
; they are occupied with thai* w*&
and believe In it
SEATTLE IS NOT in the A«fj|i
Mr. Higgln* gave 12 retMM l£t|
Kv>r> reason w«a a truth, ttpj
tnrh was a revelation of oar
resources.
THE SIGHT OF 409 aKCrWMft' 1
business men of tha city eamtfe
approving th" argument* oawtaMl
me that right hera aad now at
hare the spirit of opOmiaa, Jkl
reason* for It and the orgaaMfel|]
of it necessary for success.
I AM WITH BROWNIW j
find the earth not grey bat mmm
heataji not grim but fair of ha*. 4(J
1 *toopT I pluck a posy. Do IMr
and stare? All"* blue." j
LET THIS BE your Now T«Mt|
greeting. Some things caaaat Itf]
done singly. We must act tqpflMß!
I>et us organise our optimism Mi
then Ibe blessing* which bettß W
city will cover you.