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THE LAFAYETTE GAZETTE. VOLUME I. LAFAYETTE, LA., SATURDAY, OCTOBER 7, 1803. NUMBER 31. PEREGRINE BROWN'S TELEGRAM When 11 elbres ill, . As it Often will, 'Tie not alwaya a homeopathic pill. But a dose, sometimes, that will cure or kilL Bow the fates did frown On Peregrine Drown, 'he wretchedest man in tfeadowtownl When be went to buy, The price was high: Whes he went to sell, the price went down. His pipe wont out, while his chimney smoked; His well ran dry, though his hay was soaked. It wouldn't have been so hard to bear If his placid wife had borne her share Of Fortune's trfkis in her own domain; Slut her butter "came," and the kindly rain Fell only on her serried box. iler pansy beds, and her starry phlox; 'Though the chimney smoked, her bread was light. Her ranks of milk pans silver bright; And she always sung the same old song: "It's all your fault that things go wrong;" At ltst one day. A, gate gave way, And the c l's broke loose in a wild foray On his q,.ghbor'a cornfield, Hip, hoorayl If the last straw breaks the camel's back. 'Tere strange, indeed, if so huge a pack Did not break down Poor Peregrine Drown. From his wife's shrill tongue and his neigh. bors' Ire lie fled; but the omnipresent wire. That probes the world with its points of fire, Pierced to his hiding place. It said: "Peregrine Brown, your child is dead; ,our wife Is dying;" Homo he sped, Forgetting the ills that he had fled, Like gnat-stings healed a month ago, In the terrible woe LThat froze his heart like a shroud of snow. At the well-known farm. The angry neighbor touched his arm, As he growled: "Now pay me for my corn. That your cows destroyed;" With a flash of scorn D3rown flung him his due "Now tell me, man, Does my wife yet live?" The churl began, With shame-flushed cheek, to make reply: "I had never heard she was like to die I Who told you?"-A patter of little feet Cut short his words. No sound more sweet Is heard In IIeaven. With sobs of Joy The trther clasped to his heart his boy. Though the rain still soaks His hay and his rye; Though his chimney smokes, And his well runs dry; Though the price is high When he goes to buy And is low as his well When he goes to sell: Thorl.h his "hired man" will run away On the very morn of a haying day; 'though his cows prefer green corn to hay, And his wife still sings the same old song: "It's all your fault that things go wrong;" Though the fates still frown (In a minor way) Yet Peregrine Brown Is blithe and gay In fact, as all his neighbors say, He's the happiest man in Meadowtown. -Edward Payson Jackson, in Youth's Com panion. SHE MADE HER WILL. But Her Many Relatives Were Hardly Ploasod With It. MIiss Gallipot was certainly very rich and was said to be enormously so. And her wealth hadcome to her quite unex pectedly. It would have been natural that her cousin, old Josephat Gallipot (of the firm of Gallipot & Jams). who was known to be a millionaire, slAuld have left her something handsome. But no one could have guessed he would make her his heiress, least of all after she had quarreled with him. After he had been a widower twenty years old Josephat Gallipot made up his mind to marry his kitchen maid, who was not more than forty years his junior and was engaged to the milk man. Then Miss Gallipot wrote him a let ter: "MY DEAn Jon: I don't suppose it will make any difference 'whether I write to you or not. But I have a regard for you, and feel it on my conscience to do what I can to prevent your bringing great misery on yourself. "You have a perfect right to marry again if you choose, and you can certainly afford to pick a wife who has nothing but herself to recom mend her. But the girl you are choosing would be dear at the price if she brought you her own weight in gold, and she's no feather by the look of her. "She will make you miserable, and I would beg you to draw back from giving her the op portunity. She has no affection for you, and if you have any for her it will make it the worse for you. Your sincerely affectionate cousin, '"SARAn GALL OT." To this letter no reply was sent, and a week later the milkman's fiancee be came Mrs. Gallipot. No further com mnunication took place between the cousins, and a couple of years after ward Josephat Gallipot went the way of all flesh. No one was more simply astonished than Miss Sarah Gallipot when she learned that she had succeeded to his entire fortune. He wrote: "To my wife I bequeath my memory, know ing that my love has been enough for her, and that she has saved well during the two years of our wedded life, for I do not belleve that our household expenses have been seventy-five thousand dollars per annum. "To my cousin, Sarah Galllpot, I bequeath absolutely all my real and personal estate, in recognition of her candor and sincerity, and with unavailing regret that I did not profit by her warning." The will was dated a fortnight before his death, and in process was duly proved and administered. Then Miss Gallipot discovered how tenderly she was loved, and how count less were her kinsmen and kinswomen. For fifty-nine years she had been in the habit of considering herself as rather alone in the world. In her six tieth year she found it was not so. Nieces dropped from the sky, neph ews rose from the earth, the clouds distilled godchildren on to her head and cousins fell around her like hailstones. Nor did they come empty. Eiome brought game from the coun try, some sent choice fruits from their hothouses. If she had lived to be seven hundred and eighty she could not have worn out the cozy bedroom slippers that were worked for her, and if she had had as many mouths as the Nile she could neverhave drunk up all the wines that were sent her. Devonshire cream came out of the west; cakes of all sizes, shapes and de scriptions came down from the north and oysters from all quarters came rap ping at her door.a And the letters of affection that ne companied them! These pasm all de scription, and should have convinced their recipient that of all the old ladies that had ever lived she was herself the derest. most beharming sand rst be IQae* hi hew jtwelaps. Eleven years after the death of old Josephat Gallipot his cousin and heiress followed him. It was a very hard winter, and from almost the beginning of it the old lady had declared that it would be her last on eartit. Her house, Gray Court, was a very.big one; but it was soon filled to overflow ing-filled with nieces and nephews, cousins and godchildren, all eager to be "in at the death." Each had received a similar letter from the old lady's housekeeper saying: "'liss Gallipot thanks you for your de sire to come and bid her good-by, but she begs you will not take the trouble of coming so far. She appreciates all your affection, but would not like to trespass. If, however, you insist on coming I have her orders to prepare a room for you." And each one came. Each found a comfortable apartment made ready for his or her arrival, and each found a Scripture text in large capital letters framed upon the mantel piece. The text was the same in each room: "Where the carcass is there shall the eagles be gathered together." Gray Court was full of guests, but not one of them was admitted to the dying chamber of the hostess. The doctors, or the nurse, or the old housekeeper seemed always on guard, and it would have been easier to slip past a sentry than to get past them. On the last day of the old year the life of their hostess ebbed away; and while the mufflaec peal was ringing out over the frozen fields her naked soul crept shivering out into the night. On the eve of the twelfth day was the funeral, and, after it, all received a mandate from the deceased's .lawyer to attend the reading of the will. It was read in a very large room, like a storeroom, in which they all found themselves for the first time. The will commenced with liberal be quests to the deceased's doctor, lawyer and parish clergyman, benefaction as to the local poor and to certain charities. When these were finished the guests breathed freely. Then followed generous legacies to her servants and a handsome provision for the old housekeeper who had been faithful to her during so many years. Then came a list of the names of all the guests. "To each of whom," said the will, "I leave and bequeath such legacy and bequest as I have already indicated to you, my executor, and which you will in turn indicate and hand over to them on the occasion of the reading of this, my last will and testament." The lawyer paused, and, rising from his place, requested the attendant servants to draw back the curtains that hung on rings and rods all round the room. This being done, large cupboards were disclosed, each having painted upon it in large letters the name of one of the guests. To each guest the lawyer handed a key, requesting them to open the cup board where they would find their be quest. Each one found within his or her cupboard every gift that he or she had ever made to the deceased exactly as they had been received. All provisions, fruit, cream, game, etc., had (they were now informed) been immediately dispatched to one or other of the great London hospitals. B3ut each cupboard contained also a purse in which was placed the full value of such provisions, with a sum equal to the compound interest on the value of the other untouched gifts. The will went on: "And the residue of my estate, real and per. snnal, whether in lands, tenements, houses, 1 frnds. stock, jewelry, plate, pictures, books, I furniture, or of any kind whatsoever, I hereby leave and bequeath to my nearest relation, male or female, kniown to me or unknown, of whomn it cannot be proved that he or she has at any time shown to me any act of kindness, cour tesy, good-will, politenesr affection at least since theed day of January, in the year of our Lord 1877, whereon deceased my late cousin. Josephat Gallipot, of the firm of Gallipot & i Jams." The will provided that such claim must, however, be lodged within six months of the death of the testator. And thence arose the great Gallipot case. The whole property subsequently n fell to a distant relation of the Gallipot | family, of whose existence most mem bers of the family had up to that time been quite unaware.-London Million. A RATTLING TIME. Given a Stlck and a Picket Fence the Boyg Is Bound to Hlave It. "Every middle-aged than of sound memory who was brought up in town," said Mr. Gratebar, "will recall the fact that when he was a boy he found great delight in rattling a stick along the picket fences. This amusement of childhood, like many others of that period of life, appears to have been transmitted from generation to genera tion without material change. The strings of spools and the soldier hats and so on of the children of to-day are substantially like those of their fore fathers. liut it might seem to some that this succession is in danger of be ing broken. In many suburban towns and villages there is now nio picket fence. - The modern spirit says lawns, and so there are many places where the houses are as if in parks, and where the'younger children might not know a picket fence if they should see one. I have two children, for instance, who I am quite sure have never enjoyed the felicity of rattling a hard stick against the resounding pickets. It might in deed seem, under such circumstances, that this is one of the enjoyments of childhood which in some families might be lost altogether; that one could scarcely expect the children of these children who have never rattled pickets to think of it themselves: but I cannot believe this. I believe, rather, that if in their youth the children of these children should come upon a town where picket fences still remained they would pick up the hardest stick and go quite naturally and very gleeful ly rattling it along the pickems; for I cannot believe that a habit grounded for centuries in the humnan race can be utterly lost by its lapse in a single gon awtlon.--N, Y. Sun. DRESSING FOR THE RIDE. Neat and Comfortable Costumes for Equs triennes. The materials used in the making at women's riding habits are broad an' severt cloths, and, especially for sum u.er wear, light-weight serges. The "alors are black, blue, gray, brown it 3ark and tan shades, and only very oc assionally the hue which was once the most fashionable-dark green. Hlabitb are made this season usually in but two pieces-jacket and skirt-eques trienne tights having to a great exteni replaced the riding trousers once at generally worn. The waist is what is known as the English cut: a round short basque with coat back not postilion - and with plai, jacket or cutaway front. Double breasted effects are used quite as often as single. Linings are of silk. satin-serge or, more commonly, o01 farmers' satin or dress lining. The buttons are always specially manun factured from the cloth of which the habit is made, with horn or leather backs and edges. A tiny pocket for the hunting watch and handkerchief it fund on the lower left-hand side ol the front of the basque. Adjustable dickies, and cuffs which button to the jacket with tiny flat pearl buttons, are sometimes used. They are made o1 Mime contrasting color, hunting pink a rich, light red-being the favorite shade. Skirts are made much shorte, or late than in former years, and this season's styles show no change in the sensible alteration. For a skirt to be the correct length ii should just escape the ground when the wearer is standing, or should reach the tip of the boot on the outer limb when she is in the saddle. A comfortable summer habit consists of a serge riding shirt and blazer worn with a silk shirt-waist. While the absolutely proper head piece for a riding costume in the ladies beaver, or high hat. there are many' other more comfortable and equally becoming styles of headgear that claim recognition. Caps made in one or in four sections, with round visor or peaked front, soft felt slouch hats, En glish derbys or small-brimmed sailor hats, in white, black or dark blue, are ail appropriate. A veil should always be worn with the riding costume. A plain tulle or net veil, reachinn to the tip of the nose, Is considered the correct thing. The prettiest veils, however, are those made from twc yards of white gauze. They are fas. tened with one end to the back of the hat, hrouglht around over the brim and face, and, crossing at the back, wound tightly around the neck. A four-buttoned glove of heavy kid, in tan or mode shades similar in style to a gentleman's walking glove, is the most comfortable for riding. Soft Russia leather gloves made with anr elastic at the inside of the wrists, with a gore inserted at the outer eanm, so an to form a gauntlet ,are preferred to the stiff gauntlets formerly worn. Iligil boots made of kangaroo or finest calf skin are the most fashionable for rid ing wear: but any flat-heeled, easy shoe, with stiff ankle support, is, how ever, all that is necessary -Ladies Homc .lourna l. HOME SACRIFICES. The hlardships of Loyslty to Family Ob. Ilgations. A Yale rstudent had barely finished his college course when his father died suddenly, leaving a large family in re duced circumstances. The young man had planned a professional career for himself, and had an excellent opening in a western city. Without a murmur he remained in the east, obtained a clerkship in an insurance office, and earned what he could for the support of his famtily. Year after year he devoted his life with cheerfulness to a business for which he had no taste. It was a plain duty to help his mother and sisters. and it was not shirked. As time passed he read law and was admitted to the bar, but, the necessity of feeding and clothing those at home forced him to remain an insurance clerk. Meanwhile, college classmates without a drag upon their careers were rising steadily to positions of eminence in professional life. ''Some men always get the burnt cooky," he used to say. grimly. That was his sole comment upon the sacrifice of his youthful hopes and am bitions to commonplace home duties. Another college graduate had hardly received his diploma before lie was compeled to face poverty and family disgrace. Ilis father, who had been reputed to be wealthy, was an em bezzler and a fugitive from justice. Ills mother and sisters were entirely dependent upon his modest earnings in a broker's office. He had planned taking an advanced course of professional study in archi tecture. lHis ideal occupation had to be abandoned. lie was in love with a charming girl, but ceased to visit her, since marriage'was out of the question. An opportunity for a year's travel in Europe at a friend's expense was given up.; Year after year he maintained a hard, bitter struggle to make a living at un congenial employment for his mother and sister, to support his father abroad, and to overcome prejudice caused by the family disgrace. He be came a successful business man, but was prematurely gray at forty. lHii life was haunted by the ghosts of his youthful hopes. Such lives do not furnish material for exciting estories. They are dull and prosaic, ~at are nevertheless heroic. To give up all the. is dear to yonth, and to be loyal to family obligations, sometimes is a crowning triumph of un selfishness.-Youth's Companion. DUE TO ALCHEMY. The DIscovery of a Way to M1ake Porees lain Almost an Accident. Although porcelain was known t, both the Chinese and Japanese for aget it was not introduced into Europe until t he beginning of the eighteenth cen tury, when John Botteher, a native ol Schiz in Voightland, was the first tc make it. This man was apprentice to a Berlin apothecary named Zorn. in whose shop he conferred some favor upon a pro fessed alchemist, who in return prom ised to teach him the art of transmut ing the baser metals into cold. Bottch er, after studying under his new mas ter for a time, imagined that his for tune was made, and in 1700 he ran away. He was pursued, but found proIction among friends, who demanded to wit ness an exhibition of his pretended skill, and the poor fellow was eventu ally compeled to acknowledge that he had been imposed upon. But he persevered in his lanors, and on one occasion, having made a mix ture of various finely-organized earth for the purpose of making strong cruci bles, he discovered after he had taken the compound mass from the oven that he had gained a kind of pottery more beautiful than he had ever seen. The transmutation, it may therefore be said, took place not in the metals indeed, but in his own person, but Bottcher was suddenly changed from an alchemist to a potter. In 1700 the first porcelain was manufactured in Dresden. Being made of colored clay it pre sented a light brownish red hue, but as nearly as 1809 a beautiful white por celain was obtained, and its manufac ture was fully established during the following years.-St. Louis Republic. HOW ITIS DONE. Replaclng Overturned Cars and Engines on the Tracks. The derrick handles derailed cars and engines with marvelous ease. The track repairers level the ground about the prostrate car or engine, if it be down an embankment, build a tempo rary track down to it, and then let the derrick car get to work. The hydraul ic jack usually comes into play in turn ing car or engine upon its feet, but the derrick, with the horse and saddle, does the work of placing a ear upon trucks. The derrick reaches round for a truck from the flat car and drops it on the temporary track, lifts one end of the car until the horse and saddle may be shifted under it. and when a truck has been rolled under one end lifts the other so that a second track may be put in place. This done, the car is dragged up to the main track and run upon a siding. An en gine must be handled with greater care, and a skilled mechanic is usually at hand to see that no harm comes to its mechanism. Passenger cars need like care, because, although strong be low the windows, they are flimsy in the roof. Air brakes and easily-removable parts of the engine are taken off before the lifting begins. All the ingenuity of the wrecker is called into phay when a wreck lies at the bottom of a river, and sometimes days, or even weeks. are required to get an engine from such a predicament. Once engine and cars have been set upon their feet a length of track laid upon a raft is sunk beside them. Other lengths of track are added, banks and even river beds are graded, if need be, and in time the wreck is triumphantly drugged ashore on the temporary track. -Commercial-( azette. FATHER HAMON'S STATISTICS. Extenteof the Great Inanlgration from the North. There are in New England at least S00,000 I"rench Canadians, some of them born in Canada of lrench-('anadian parents, and some born in the United States. In a work entitled "',Les Cana diens-Francais de la Nouvelle Angle terre," Father Ilamon gives the numn ber of French-Canadian Catholics in New England in 1891 as .02.0.159-about one-third of the total Catholic popula tion of the six states. As these statis tics are collected by the church for its own purpose, they are probably nearly accurate. The book, it should be stated. was written for the purpose of enforcing upon the people who had quitted their native parishes the duty of remaining faithful to their church, and of preserving their language, and their royal love at least for the country of their ancestors. In addition to the French Canadians who had settled in New England. Fa ther Hlamon says there are about 100. 000 other French Canadians in the northern part of the state of New York and the diocesses of Syracuse and Albany. An interesting and important fact is also mentioned by the reverend writer in connection with the French Canadians who are in New 'England. lie points out that most of the Enghlish speaking Roman Catholics "are con centrated in certain great cities of the east, like ltoston,where alone there are 250,000 Catholics: while the Canadians, on the contrary, for the most part es tablish themselves in the small manu facturing towns, and they already have a majority in several of them."--lenry Loomis Nelson, in Hlarper's Magazine Nothiag New In It. '"I spent half the afternoon the other day," said Mrs. ]Hilltops, "trying to match a woolen dress of my daugh ter's in silk, and the nearest I could come to it was at least two shades too dark; but that didn't disturb my daughter a bit: slhe simply spread it out next day in the sun and faded it to a perfect match. She was inclined to take great credit to herself for this. for she thought it was an o.-iginal idea, as indeed it was with her; but I explained to her that it was very, very old: that I had myself done the same thing with a faded gingham dress, for instance, for which I desired to make a new waist or a new pair of sleeves; that I had taken a new piece of the same materirl and washed it and hung it out in the sun, and had repeated this process until the new utaterial was faded to nmatch the old; that in fact this is one of those discoveries that people simply keep on making over and over again."'-N. Y. Sun. An (Hbm.ect in VIew. lie-She says she likes to have me call on her. SShe-What's the name of the fellow she is trying to hlrry uP?-Ir001ookJln Lie, OUR PETTY OFFICIALS. One of the Ways by Which Some of Them Abuse Their Authority. The offices of policeman, constable and justice are popularly supposed to signify a desire on the part of the pub lic to have the laws of the land de cently observed. To this end efforts should be made to secure as in cumbents for these offices men pos sessing at least a reasonable amount of common sense. Instead of this, however, the conduct of some of these people is such as to awaken a suspicion that their chief aim and object is to display their petty authority. It seems absolutely necessary to them to bluster and storm, to use a club or sometimes a revolver as a means of intimidation. The newer they are to the business the greater spectacles they make of themselves, and the more to be pitied is the unfortunate who chances to fall into their clutches. Well is it for him if he escapes with a whole skull and unfractured bones. No matter what the offense or who the victim may be, no officer should be allowed to do any thing that might by any possibility work injury to the person under arrest. Exception may be made to this rule only where the person to be taken into custody violently resists arrest, and where it is necessary to use force to se cure him. IMere remonstrance or a re fusal to go should never be made the excuse for blows. In an event of this sort the officer is always .able, if he choose to do so, to summon necessary help and effect the arrest without club bing. A great many police officers seem,to think themselves authorized to be judge, jury and counsel, and to hold within their own persons .the right to enforce what penalties this curious process of reasoning may suggest to them as proper. It is quite time that some attention was given to educating those who have the appointing power, up to a pitch where they would take measures to suppress this very grave abuse. If a few men were made ex amples of for using their club too free ly, the effect on the remainder of the force would be somewhat discouraging to this practice, and in time we might hope to have-guardians of the peace as some one has ofacetiously called them, who are not more dangerous to the community than the actual crim inals themselves.-N. Y. Ledger. ESCAPING TORTURE. How a Prisoner's Presence of Mind Saved Him Many Painful IHours. During Gen. Custer's attacks on Black Kettle's camp during one of the United States' Indian wars, some of the prisoners, taking advantage of the thick brush, broke through the line of the troops, and escaped to the prairie. Maj. Elliott, calling some of his men to follow, clashed off in pursuit of the fugitives. Not one of the nineteen cavalrymen was ever again seen alive by a white man. Intent on his purpose, and not sus pecting the vicinity of other camps, Maj. Elliott found his little party sur rounded by an overwhelming horde of Indians. Dismounting, loosing their horses and forming in a circle, the little band of twenty brave men prepared to sell their lives as dearly as possible. In less than twenty minutes every man but one was dead. Wounded in several places, his am munition expended. Scrgt.- Maj. Ken nedy stood alone, saber in hand. No shot was fired at him, no effort was made to kill him, but several of the Indians approached him with hands thrust out. saying: "How? lIow?"' Too well he knew the meaning of this kindly demonstration. He was to be reserved for all the horrors of the torture. He saw that his only hope of escaping torture was in so exasperating the In dians that they would kill him. Seeming to surrender, he advanced toward the chief. They approached each other. hands extended. Quick as thought Kennedy's sword passed through the chief's body. One instant of terrified surprise on the part of the Indians: the next, twenty bullet-holes in Kennedy's body. The merciful death had come to him.--Yankee Blade. Curious 1Mode of Identiftemstion. The science of modern anthropogra' phy is constantly increasing its re sources by introducing new measure ments of various parts of the body, par ticularly among the criminal class. The measurement of the hand and fingers is now considered of vast importance in establishing personal identity. It is certainly curious, in view of this fact. to know that a similar process has been in vogue among savage tribes, who thus recognize their friends and foes. Capt. Cupet reports that the inhabitang of southern Anam place a thin bamboW rod between the middle finger and the sing finger of strangers who invade their territory, on whicn they mark by notches the distance from nail to the first phalanx and all succeeding ones. This bamboo rod is preserved. Every stranger is compeled to submit to this measurement. When they return after a protracted absence the rod is applied as mentioned, and their identity estab lished as a friend, a new-comer or a foe. Capt. Cupet, on his returns to Anam, was always remeasured. lie says that a similar method is practiced in the Laos provinces.-St. Louis Post D;spatch. Only One Didn't Rnow. Bilkins (suffering from a heavy cold) -I met forty-five different acquaint ances this morning, and just forty-four of them told me of some sure cure for a cold. Wife-Didn't the forty-fifth offer any advice? Bilkins--No. He had a cold himself. --N. Y. Weekly. A Tale of Several Cities "'Let's go out and see them play batse ball this afternoon." "I don't known anything about the "0. that's all right. You'll bie in good company. Neither does the homa *lub."-Washington Star, CRITICISM AS LUXURY. Chronto FaIt-llnders Who Find Their Prime Pleasure in Maklng some One Unhappy. "There is, once in awhile, a person," said a veteran journalist, who is a keen student of human nature, "whose highest idea of pleasure is to find fault. There are people of whom it is said that they are never happy unless they are miserable; but this class seem never to be happy unless they are making some one unhappy or trying in some way to cause irritation and discomfort. If by any hook or crook they can find a peg in somebody's words or conduct upon which they can hang an objec tion, it is, metaphorically, peaches and cream for them. They are industrious in seeking for such occasions, and when once found, they buzz about them like a fly around a sugar-bowl. That their criticisms are often im pertinent, and much more often ill timed, is a matter that seems to trouble them not a whit. Indeed, one might fancy that this was precisely what they were aiming at. Many of their outbreaks are provoked by new ideas. or, what is quite to the same purpose. things they never happened to hear of. This latter reason is to them, ample provocation for fault finding. New ideas are all right if they originate them, but woe be to the unfortunate persons who suggest something different without their ap proval. "There are few forms of impertinent meddling more annoying than that which breaks out into unreasoning criticism of acts and ideas that are na little out of the common. The plea that certain things are not right be cause they have not been is the plea of ignorance and narrow-mindedness Many years ago a man in the prime of life sat upon the steps of the cap itol building at Washington and wept bitter tears because he was called a fool,a crank and a lunatic for insisting that messages could be sent from one part of the country to another over an electric wire. To-day the name of Morse stands high on the roll of the world's greatest benefactors. The principal reasons given for disbelief in his theory were that such things had never been heard of, and consequently had no claim to recognition. If Morse and the world's great inventive brigade had been extinguished by the narrow minded criticism of those who 'never heard of it' the world would to-day lack many of its comforts and luxuries. The 'never-heard-of-its' are ever with us, but we must bear with them as best we can, for they are likely to remain with us, world without end."-N. Y. Led ger. PASSION OF PANIC. SMore Harm from Mlen Losing Their Heads Than from Actual Conditions. In times of financial or commercial demoralization above all others impos sible is a fair and cool estimate of the deranged conditions. I'nreasoning dis trust and unmitigated selfishness con trol the situation. Every unfavorable factor is magnified and every favorable one is minified. lMen of heretofore sober and courageous judgment fall a prey to their fears; men of impulse be come virtual maniacs, lured by will-o' the-wisps and horrified by nightmare. The danger of a crisis never arises from the actual conditions one-half so much as from men of affairs losing their heads. Because a small number of in solvent m crchants or speculators have run the length of their rope and must forthwith settle up-therefore every body ceases to trust any body and rushes to claim his own; which means a general winding up of credits and more or less suspension of business throughout the community. Nobody would pretend to character ize all this sort of a thing as anything short of a species of insanity: and yet, in spite of this consciousness of the ut ter irrationality of panic, no one seemsr capable of rational self-control. The explanation of this anomaly seemns to be that the instincts to which men sur render themselves in these periods be come insanities when allowed unfet tered action. Fear and selfish ness have a valuable function when kept within due limits: but unrestrained they become most dangerous stimuli of social disorgani zation. The two interact upon each other and mutually inflame pne anoth er. The fear of loss incites the selfish desire to collect one's own, no matter who may have borrowed it nor what the borrower may suffer from its with drawal. In turn, the effect of this vio lent process of compelling liquidation is to intensify fear through the conse quent disorganization of credit. A worse pair of passions could not be let loose upon society: nevertheless, they are distinctive passions of panic. It is hopeless to seek to control these destructive forces in any other way than through avoiding the incitements calculated to bring them into activity. Vhen we come to understand how much the natural adjustment of disordered conditions is hindered by the artificial regulations introduced by legislation, we shall have taken a long step to wards mitigating the virulence of panics. The restrictions of- bank re serve laws are the principal hindrances to an easy and natural adjustment and become the chief excitants to the feel ings that run riot. When those re straints are ignored fear abates and remedy sets in. Regulations that, when enforced, become scarecrow, panic breeders do not regulate, but dis integrate.-N. Y. Journal of Commerce. Welighing the OGaests. At Sandringhamn the prince of 1Vales has established the custom of weighing the coming and parting guests. At the first convenient qpportunity, after being shown to his bedroom, the guest is weighed, the entry made in a book, and he is weighed again on thie morn ing of his departure. The book in which the record is kept is a bulky vol ume. Among other signatures is that of ''"Salisbury," with the portentious annoneceme-t following that on his last visit to Sandringhlam the prenmieur weighed over eighteen stone. -Chicago ;'iews. PITH AND POINT. -The man who loses most is the 'one who tries to keep all he gets.-Ram'a Horn. -Contentment is the feeling that you are better off than your neighbor. Puck. --Contentment is better than riches,* but takes about the same amount of money for one as the other.-Inter Ocean. --Misfortunes.-Kate-"She fell in love and married him." Ilattic-"Mi.n fortunes never come singly."''-Detroit Free Press. -During the preserving season the housewife realizes that one essential of the occupation is to preserve her equa nimity.-lBoston Courier. -If you want to please an ordinary man call him good-looking; if you want to please a very homely man call him handsome. -Boston Transcript. -Talking about the enjoyment of riches, the boy with fifty cents in his pocket when the circus comes to town can give points to the millionaire. -Papa-"Do you say grace at the seminary?" Product of Modern Educa tion-"Certainly. I never heard of more than one pronunciation."-Truth. -It is interesting to see how sorry the man who went to the country for a vacation and the man who staid at home are for each other.-WVashington Star. -The cobbler who posts a sign, "Shoes mended while you wait." caste an involuntary reflectiop on the pros perity of all his customers.-Somerville Journal. ---1 iss Whacker-"Do you consider it a sign of weakness in man to weep, 'Mr. Factor?" AMr. Factor-"That depends upon who is playing the piano." Cleveland Plain Dealer. -Johnny-"Do you own a circus all of your own?" Mr. Slimpurse-"No. Why?" "Sister said she didn't believe you could keep the wolf from the door for a week."-Inter-Ocean. -"They call love the tender passion," said the young man who had just ac quired another sister, "but it strikes me that it is about as tough as possi ble."-Indianapolis Journal. --When a man dies they call it heart failure. When a newspaper dies they say it is busted, though in both cases it is the want of circulation that caused the death.-Dansville Breeze. -"'We hear a great deal about the seven ages of mnan, but no one ever al ludes to the seven ages of woman what is the reason?" "Gallantry, my boy, gallantry."--Boston Gazette. -An Opportunity.-He-"I suppose Chicago girls all wanted to marry the duke of 'ara gua?" She-"WVell-er he's married already." He--"That's nothing, he was in Chicago,wasn't he?" -Truth. -His Relatives. The sluggard declined to go To the ant: because. as he said. The ant isan't in it at all. you know He'd go to the uncle. instead. -Detroit Free Press. -Lord D'nasse--"You have no mar riage settlements in this state. I hear?" Miss Harcourt-"No,butwe havesome thing far better." Lord D'Masse-"A~v -what?" Miss Harcourt-"Alimony." -Vogue. -New Reporter-"You cut my col umn article on drinking water to half a dozen lines. What was the reason?" City Editor-"Thought you wanted it that way." New Reporter--"The dick ens you did' Why?" City Editor You had it headed "Boil Before Us ing." I boiled it all I knew how and still you kick."--Buffalo Courier. THE DELICIOUS PEACH. Few People Know Blow to Serve It as It Should he Served. "There are but few people who know how to serve peaches and cream in a manner worthy of that luscious tlux ury," observed a lady the other evening at a restaurant where the fruit had been placed before her in an altogether unattractive style. "Let me tell you." she continued, "how to present the fruit in a manner fit for the gods. To begin with. take two or three large freestone peaches, yellow ones. fairand smooth, for each guest whomn you ex pect to serve. Place them in a vessel andl pour very hot water upon them until they are entirely covered. Let them remain in the scalding water for a half or three-quarters of a minute and then pour a covering of cold water upon them and add a lump of ice as large as a cocoanut. "After they have stood in the cooling bath ten or fifteen minutes lift them out one by one and remove the skin, which can be done with surprising ease by starting it with a knife and pulling it gently with the fingers, as one does in peeling tomatoes after similar treatment. The only difference is that the skin comes off peaches more easily than it does off tomatoes. When the skins are removed put the peaches into a large earthen dish, being careful to pile them on top of one another as lit tle as possible, and place the vessel in the refrigerator. Ten minutes before it is time to serve them lift them care fully, one at a time, into a large cut glass dish-a salad bowl will answer capitally-and cover them over with finely-chopped ice. At the table the hostess is to serve them in flat plates- not in small, deep dishes-and for each person there must be a fork and a small fruit knife, with which the pits can be removed easily and without any 'mussiness' Served in this way and with fine sugar and a cut-glass pitcher filled with rich, golden cream, a dish of peaches becomesa beautiful,luscious, melting dream. Over such a dainty one may reverently thank nature for pal ates and Heaven for peaches."-Y. Y Herald. Decidedly Iaeoaslderte. First Boy-I don't think much of those workin'men's uniolg Second Boy--Why not? First Boy-Th' house and sign paint ers had a big meetin' yesterday, an' passed a hull lot of resolutions, an' they didn't once resolve not to paint any more "Keep Of The Ora~"' ilgnsl.-. Goo4 NewU.