The echo., November 01, 1954, The National Weekly MAGAZINE SECTION, Image 11

About The echo. (Meridian, Miss.) 1942-1960

Image provided by: Mississippi Department of Archives and History

                
IS EXPERIENCE
NECESSARY
FOR A WIFE?
By Roy B. Parker
“She’s been around and knows
the ropes. Now she's ready to
settle down. She'll make some
man a fine wife.” So goes an
observation often heard these
days, and usually about a gal
who’s got around, threw her
vveightht and curves about and
made quite a splash for news
and gossip.
To sum things up, she's had
her fun from life and at the
same time majored in the im
portant subject of “experience’ .
Does such a gal make a sincere,
honest, devoted wife in compar
• 1 - i- 1. _ D ^ AnVPA.
iOUli iw tiiv. ' '
to-the-fireside gal who has
spent nearly all her life under
parental wings, and awaits her
Lochinvar in chaste estate. Such
a girl is unacquainted with
Life's devious paths, unseen
dangers and crushing frustra
tions. Is she the safer bet for
wifely material and the ideal
home companion?
The woman with experience
has dipped into the various lev
els of life and though she may
be somewhat mortally scarred
and physically shopworn, many
times she has proven a safe
Det for the finest kind of wife
hood. She is a good and game
sport and knows how to accept
life and how to take it on the
chin without whimpering and
complaining. She has learned
that no man is perfect and
therefore she accepts her man
as he is . . . and loves him.
Having turned her back on the
unsavory things of life, she is
spiritually prepared to do good
and shoot straight. Of course
there are exceptions where the
lures of the Past prove too
strong and a woman may be
tempted into her old ways once
more. But if she has really
made up her mind to live st
raight she will prove a straight
shooter and a joy in more than
a few ways to the guy who has
won her affection.
Be Sure To Read
The j
| CHARLOTTE, N. C. I
STORY
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Next Week’s
l National Weekly
PAGE G
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POPULAR LIBRARY CLASS
LIBRARY CLASS—A popular class in the Johnson C.
Smith in Charlotte, N. C., is one in Library Science, taught
by the University Librarian, T. L. Gunn (extreme right).
Shown in the picture above are members of the class for the
current session.
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Marriage Romance Up To You
And Person On Whom Yon Bet
When He Or She Became Mate
Fate determines the amount
of romance you will have in
your marriage. But your own
knowledge and understanding of
romance determine your fate.
Romance in marriage depends
upon you and upon the person
on whom you bet your life
when you married.
In order to keep romance in
your marriage, you need to un
derstand the difference between
romance before and after a wed
ding. Some married people are
most unhappy because they ex
pected romance in marriage to
be exactly like that with which
they entered it.
They are doomed to miss ro
mance because of their own ex
pectations. When they fell in
love they were caught up and
whirled upon dizzy flights of
fantasy through rainbow clouds
of romantic illusion.
# # *
The little time which they
! could snend together snarked
' imagination and conjured up
j ecstatic dreams. Sex urges,
which drive toward mating, are
blocked for many good reasons
in our society. This restriction
inflates the power of attraction
just as standing in front of a
bakery tantalizes the appetite
of a hungry person and enhan
ces the anticipation of dining.
When you married, you mov
ed into an intimacy of acquaint
ance which dissipated much of
i the dream and confronted you
with a “down to earth" husband
| or wife.
Sex hunger was satisfied. That
portion of romance which de
pends upon dreams and re
straining of sex disappeared.
The fading away of this part
of prematrial romance has been
interpreted by many as the dy
ing out of love and the passing
of romance.
* # *
You can keep romance in
your marriage if you under
stand that what you keep is
mostly what you create as you
go along, and not just what you
had back yonder somewhere.
If you are successful in the
general run of ordinary day-to
day getting along and can make
your marriage a long story of
love filled with enough reassur
ance to balance the anxiety,
enough gladness to chase awray
the gloom, enough excitement
to counteract the drudgery, the
adventure of your marriage will
be your romance.
Your fate is a happy one if
your love for your husband or
wife is free of jealousy which
characterizes childish or even
adolescent love. If you find
yourself always thinking about
what you can do or say to make
your husband or wife happy,
your destiny will be full of ro
mance because your love has
grown beyond its youthful self
centerecmess. you can contri
bute toward the fulfillment and
enrichment of your loved one’s
life. It isn’t a matter of luck, as
so many believe.
If both of you have that sort
of love for each other. Romance
is guaranteed with such loving
and such living.
You can keep romance in your
marriage if your sex life is an
expression of mature love. Peo
ple who love exploitatively use
sex exploitatively. Some people
indulge in sex for its own satis
faction, and love has nothing
to do with it. If sex is sought
on an animal level, nothing but
animal returns can be expected.
# * #
Other threats to romance, as
sex is involved in it, are ignor
ance and unhealthy attitudes
and feelings. Ideas that sex is
low and beastly, vulgar and
nasty, and sinful will prevent
adjustment according to the
Creator’s plan. Mix deceit and
thoughtlessness, la.ck of respect,
and sex for its own sake—and
romance, if not marriage itself,
may be doomed.
If this physical and spiritual
relationship, which is the most
intimate of human communica
tion, serves to convey love with
all the finer resources of per
sonality supporting it, a couple
may know romance that would
be impossible under any other
circumstances.
Mix with the feelings of ten
der affection the idea that sex
is a part of God’s plan, clean
if we are clean. Add sympathy
and understanding, courtesy and
trust, passion tempered with re
spect — and contact of bodies
may but symbolize the mergihg
of spirits in a oneness that will
color romance with rainbows
and stars.
# * #
AVU VU11 11VVJJ 1 V111U.11VV 111 J VUI.
marriage if you realize that you
married quite a flock of rela
tives along with the lucky one
who married you.
You have long since learned
that these relatives do not love
you in quite the same manner
as the person whom you mar
ried loves you. In such a case,
nothing works quite so well as
treating in-laws as if they were
not relatives, but valued friends.
Some relatives are just that.
Eut it is easy to take things
for granted, and make assump
tions which can be misinterpre
ted as taking advantage, ignor
ing the common courtesies and
disregarding the rights of oth
ers when no such things is in
tended. We want our relatives
to feel freer with us and we
assume that they want us to
feel free with them.
The best insurance for happy
relationships is in being more
careful and considerate than
with people in general.
THE NATIONAL WEEKLY, Saturday, October 23, 1954