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The Ocala banner. (Ocala, Marion County, Fla.) 1883-194?, July 01, 1921, Image 7

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Persistent link: https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn88074815/1921-07-01/ed-1/seq-7/

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1, 1921.
WITS AND FUNNIES
unracc Knew
HOT.ee had been allowed the
““L of sitting up a 11.-Je later
‘ yal. Finally his mother ea'led
jTliiin to come upstairs.
Eg sis.” begged the boy.
I „ j atft y up just a little longer? I
p B ee you and Mr. Todd play
Come One, Come AH
to the
Biggest 4th July
Celebration in the state’ will be helb at
DAYTONA BEACH
! Jointly by Daytona, Daytona
I Beach and Seabreeze.
Parade, Band Concerts, Auto, Horse,
Motorcycle and Bicycle Races, Flying,
Surf-Bathing, Shore Dinners, Dancing,
Fireworks, and Everything.
Come July 2 and bring the folks.
jyr •
* V
\ Ocala,House Block, East of Public Square
VICTROLAS
25:00 $35.00
$75.00 $150.00
Supply limited at
The Book Shop
Ocala, : Fla.
t [ r eg MgjSSUtmjm Hidß 2*!
i II
\ Have you lost your appetite?
■ \ Do you get so tired with the
/ day’s duties that you re unable
Pfc'i '■ : / 1/ Ito enjoy an evening with
* // friends or at the movies once
V s * /&H in a while? Are you
%£"—■.— jJ ~=* your rosy cheeks and your
" Dr. Miles’ Tome
BUffr t 0 restore health to people in your condition. It h*s httn
MEg* benefit to thousands who were afflicted just a T
you try a bottle? Get in line : fo L., te ? C LodiriSr’
*** today. .Every Drug Store carries Dr. Miles Medicines.
llr Uk
cards.”
But we are not going to play cards
night, Horace,” said Mr. Todd.
“Oh, yes, you are; you can’t fool
me.” replied the boy. *T heard moth
er te 1 sis that everything depended
on the way she played her cards to
night”
It might he p some to from
histories the portraits o3 victorious i
generals and print pictures of wound-!
ed privates instead.—Akron Beacon-
Journal.
•• • *
“The next one in this room that;
speaks above a whisper wi.l be put j
out.” exclaimed the angry judge.
“Hip, hip, hooray!” shouted the'
prisoner, as he ran for the door.
m- • + •
Provoking
During the progress cf work on'a
<en story building a brick, accidentally
dropped by one of the laborers, hit a
negro, working on the ground, square
; iy on the head. *
The injured man looked up and yell
ed:
“Bea ittle moras careful up dar,
niggah! Data brick hit muh on de
haid and made muh bite mah tongue ’;
I. .... (
Jones—“ They say Green has been ;
j wandering in his mind ately.”
Bones—“ Well he’s safe enough.
! he can’t go far.”
••• • *
Across the Hall- “Say, Bill, can I
borrow your dress suit?”
Back Why the for
mality?”
The Other One —“Well, I couldn't
1 find it.’”
♦* • *
The real Yellow Peril isn’t a race,
j but a s yeak.—Boston Post.
** * *
A woman’s face used to be her
j fortune. Now it's the druggists.—New
t York American.
** * /
| • Tulsa needs only sackclo.h. She has
| ihe ashes.—Nashville Banner.
* * *
.
The best way to honor our dead
soldiers is to remember the 'living.—
Greenviile (S. C.) Piedmont.
•*• • .
Add Admiral Sim’s name to tne ii3t
cf those who will never become Irish
saints.—Greenboro (N. €.) Record.
** * 9
Xo matter how high tares £rs, they
always slide on down to thd ti imate
consumer.—Albany Times-tlpion.
* •• • • /
The railroads are learning that high
fare isn’t nourishing.—Norfo k Virgm
ian-Pi oc.
* • •
Methods of wie ding the ax may
change bu; ;he consumer’s neck is
sure to receive the blow.—Toledo
Blade.
me nr gp m
God established enmity between
man and the serpent; but that was be
fore a bite was good for a prescrip
tion—Dayton News.
• • *
Man reaps what he sows unless he
is an amateur gardner.—Washington
Herald.
•• • •
Peace and world disarmament are
only what we pay for.
Wars, and guns, and battle-ships are
things we have to pay tor. —Brooklyn
Eagle.
** * *
Civi ized nations: Those' that ire
regarded by their neighbors as a me
nace. —Worcester Gazette.
*• * •
It isn’t'possible for mother to cut
down her skirts for little daughter any
more.—New York American.
mm m m
+ .4RL
These are the days when one does
not need a telescope to see sun si>ot3.
! Everyone may acquire a few of his
i own.—Wheeling Intelligencer.
*• • •
Can’t some manufacturer give ~a
; sVaw ha t a boomerang shape, so it
will come back when i; blows off? —
Greenville (S. C.) Piedmont.
•• • •
A froman with a pistol put five Ku
I Klux Klansmen to flight, which proves
| that there are men of brains in that
j organization.—Arkansas Gazette.
•* * ■
Consoling
.“The fortune-teller said I would
meet with a fa al accident.”
I ‘Rea y!”
“Yes. But she told me not to worry
j —it wouldn’t happen till flie ena of
; my life.”
•• • •
Mr. Harvey’s pilgrim speech shows
that he is entitled to rank not only as
a plenipoten sary extraordinary, but
a so as an extraordinary p’enipoteuti
arv. —Nashville Southern Lumberman.
•* • *
The trouble is that the average man
wants war-time prices for what he
seLS and peace-time prices for what
he buys. “It can’t be done.”—Mar on
Star*
A Privation
“Hello, Gable!” saluted a citizen of
S jraddle Ridge. Arkansas, addressing
an acquaintance who was driving
a’ong the big road, “* going to town? ’
“Yes, dadburn it!” was the disgrunt
led reply. “Going b’cuz I want to!
Ji ve got some fading to do ana a lit
tle business that must be attended to.
There hain't no show on ear th of get
ting into a fight or haying any fun,
THE OCALA BANNER, OCALA, FLORIDA
now that this yur infernal bone dry
law has took by the throats.”
LUMBAGO
This is a rheumatism of the mus
cles of the back. It comes oh sudden
ly and is quite painful. Every move
ment aggravates the disease. Go to
Goodrich Tire Price Reduction
applies to all sixes—
without reservation
' / Ini The name of Goodrich on a tire means
/ just one thing—quality. And that quality
/p) (llljijk is always the highest that can be produced.
IB llljlfipk l|ii\ Each tire is specially designed for the ser-
II HBfnti Hill Ilflll vice it must deliver. Goodrich Fabrics, in
imim t|l|i|pitiyii the popular sizes, have established them?
lim H{ M|Sa| selves as unusual values from the stand
§) fy'lSjllfjjiH m \mm point cf real economy. Silvertown Cords
§ tilP'li mmm * n c l ass have always held first place
% j!j S iIinSHW hi the esteem of motorists, not only be
g ill g|| cause of their symmetrical perfection of
§ M'S m finish, but furthermore, by reason of their
Jj S; long life, complete dependability and sat
© m *' £|j9 isfadory performance.
§ a && Your dealer will supply you at these fair ~
|| co
i- ?5X5
: FABRI C TIRES
' *
Smooth 30x3 $12.00 Safety 32x31; >20.25"
20<£ Lower Prices s^~ ] 30x3 - U - 45 J Safet rJ 32x4 | 26 -gg_
zo/o Lower traces s.f 30x3i 16.00 1 s.fy 33x4 | 28.30
The Goodrich price redu&ion l— —
fauS - THE B. F. GOODRICH RUBBER COMPANY
Silvertowns together with Good*' . Q.Jkron, Ohio
rich Fabric tires and Goodrich Red
and Gray inner tubes.
Prince Albert’s anew 1
note in the joys of rolling ’em!
Talking about rolling
your own cigarettes, we’ll
tell you right here that
Prince Albert tobacco has
’em all lashed t£ the mast!
You’ve got a Handful-of
happiness coming your di
rection when you pal it with
P. A. and the makin’s
papers! For Prince Albert
is not only delightful to
your taste and pleasing in
its refreshing aroma, but our
exclusive patented process
frees it from bite and parch!
Nunseaubert
* the notional jay smoke
And, for a fact, rolling
up Prince Albert is mighty
easy! P. A. is crimp cut and
stays put and you whisk it
into shape before you can
count three! And, the next
* instant you’re puffing away
to beat the band!
Prince Albert is so good
that it has led four men to
smoke jimmy pipes where
one was smoked before! It’s
the greatest old buddy
smoke that ever found its
way into a pipe or cigarette!
bed, keep quiet and have Chamber
lain’s Liniment applied and a quick
recovery may be expected. Mrs. F. J.
Dann, Brock port, N. ,Y., writes: “1
can honestly say that Chamberlain’s
Liniment-Cured me of lumbago a year
ago last summer. When I began us
ing it I was flat on my back in bed and
L-. a-j v&Ki, ,?i. lx “ Tri'ihi-”-'"rT' ,<r ‘--t ** a -
Primet Albert it
sold in toppy rod
bags, tidy rod tins ,
handsome pound
and half pound tits
humidors snd in tha
pound crystal glasa
humidor with
sponge moistsner
top.
: Fringe alberi
0
CRIMP CUT
OGA3ETTE
Copyright 1921
by R. J. Reynolds
Tobacco Cos.
Wuutoo-SoteM,
N.C.
could not turn to the right or left. I
had a bottle of Chamberlain’s Lini
ment in the house and this was ap
plied to my back. It promptly drovo
away the pains and aches.” —adv
Rub-My-Tism euros sores.—6~l3-2fflL
'
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PAGE SEVEN

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