Newspaper Page Text
THE CELINA DEMOCRAT, CELINA, OHIO
cA Touch of Temperament By VINCENT Q. PERRY (Copyright, 1018. by the McClure Newspa per Syndicate.) Roimlil Adair, bettor known as Rleh nnl Stevens, dramatic actor, put down Ills tin nd mirror with an exclamation of relief, lie had Ills make-up on to satisfy his director this time, lio was Niire. It was the first tlmo ho had mailt up his face successfully fur the camera, for It was so different from 1 In1 inal;i-iii for the footlights that It was llki learning something entirely now. If everything aliout moving 1 i " tuiv acting was to be as hard us the make-up lu was sorry lu had forsaken Hit' stage for tln silent drama, hut fb.en lln tempting salary that had been used ns nn inducement for blin to slim a contract to star in feature photoplays vns worth a little Inconvenience. "I'm all ready," he iinnouni'ed, as his director appeared at his dressing-room doorway. "Now to do or die." "I'm afraid you'll have to die," the director smiled wistfully. "The star we have selected to piny opposite you has taken a tit of temperament and ab solutely refuses to go In a scene with you. She has never seen you, but has taken a dislike to you from a picture she saw of you In a Shyloek costume. She went to her home some place out of the city last nliztit. It has tied things up for goodness knows how long." "She must be crazy !' Adair ex claimed. "No, she's far from It. Slip's been overtaxed, though. lately, and I wouldn't be surprised if this is the first symptom of a nervous break down." "She couldn't be n fitting type for the part of the girl in that 'script you have for me or she wouldn't behave like this." "You don't know Gcruldine Lewis or you wouldn't say that." the director said grimly. "Sh"'s going to be one of the big stars soon." Geraldine was evidently n favorite, so Ronald re fill ined from expressing his opinion of her. Charley Dixon, the director, and Ronald, spent the rest of the day look ing over the other available stars and extra girls, but couldn't 11 ml one they could agree tin as being suitable for the part. There was nothing for it. ap parently, but to wait until Geraldine Lewis came to her senses. The fear of losing n renewal of her contract would have some effect, likely. The prospect of a holiday was not nn unpleasant one, especially as there was some business in the country that Ron nld had to attend to. His father had left him some property in the village of Windslide and It had been In the bands of the village lawyer so long that it needed looking after. If there was any way of turning it into cash Ronald was going to lind it. and he motored to the village with this object In view After registering at the hotel, he lost no time in seeking the lawyer. He ex liected to lind a notice on that gentle man's door announcing that he had gone on a fishing expedition, but this village lawyer wns different from the dramatized version of village lawyers, and was In his office and was more over engaged with a client. As Ronald waited in the little outer office he could hear a woman's melodious voice, raised In argument. The door opened and the lawyer, Mr, 'William Seruggins, came out, followed by one of the prettiest girls Ronald had ever had the pleasure of seeing. Seruggins, apparently, was escorting her to the door, but she had no intentions of go ing before she finished her argument to her satisfaction. "My mother paid thnt mortgage be fore she died, and with money I sent her, I tell yon ngain, Mr. Seruggins," she said. "I won't pay it again If I have to bring the biggest lawyer from New York here, and I can afford to do It, I'll have you to understand." t "I don't care whom you bring," Seruggins chirped in his cracked old voice. "The mortgnge isn't paid and no more Is the Interest. I'll foreclose lor my client, Mr. Adair, If it isn't paid within thirty days." Ronald stepped forward at the men tion of his name. "I am Mr. Adair. Does this young lady's claim concern me?" Seruggins stepped bnek in surprise and the young lady seized the oppor tunity of putting her case before Ron ald. Her name was Hilda Moore. She had been raised in Windslide and had gone to the city and made n success of the profession she had undertaken. She hud sent her mother money to pay off the mortgage on her old home and had seen the receipt signed by Serug gins. Rut somehow the receipt had been lost after her mother's death and now when she had returned to spend a vacation at her old home she wns threatened with being turned out. Miss Moore had made sure Serug SEES PAREGORIC AS MENACE Writer Asserts That Undue Indulgence in Mirture Results In a Form of Intoxication. The fast young man nt our boarding house has been showing unaccounta ble signs of alcoholic exhilaration. Two or three times lately, in the dead ly dull calm of the dinner session, he hns come in with a flushed face and glassy eyes and taken charge of the conversation. Lnst evening the school teacher was telling about the splendid progress of the welfare work, when the F. Y. M. broke In with a risque story nnd lnughed boisterously nt his own remarks. Some of us. In whom the spark of life Is still latent, took the F. Y. M. nside, with the Intention of ascertaining the source of his levity, nnd what I learned I am slipping to my friends for their Information. It's paregoric absolutely. What do you think of a sport who will step out with a bottle of paregoric nnd liiake an evening of It? Two nigh' ago he came In with a dent in bis : r!y nnd hit cane spilt, bringing gins could not Bet n word In edgeways and before he could get In his aide of the story, Ronald ended It by saying: "I think there iius been some mistake, so I will sign the receipt for you my self, Miss Moore.'' "Oh, thank you," alio benmed. "It Isn't Just because of the money, for luckily I have plenty, but I don't want fo be bpnten by thnt ninn. Men have been causing me enough trouble late ly !" Ronald did not hide his smile. After Ronald had satisfactorily es tablished his Identity nnd the proper papers had been made out, he offered to drive Miss Moore homo In his cor. She accepted his offer. As they skim med over the country roads he had nn opportunity to survey the girl beside him. She was almost the prettiest girl ho had ever seen. Her conversation was not artificial and ho found her a most Interesting person able to talk on the subjects he cared for most, and never once speaking of herself. The people of the studio had his nd dress and would wire him when Cor nhline Lewis came bnek. He called nt the telegraph ofllce every morning for the expected message, but It did not coine. Miss Moore and he became very friendly nnd soon she accompanied him in his car on most of his drives. The days passed nnd still there was no word from the studio. Every day he culled to take Miss Moore out In his car, nnd before long they reached the stage where he called her Hilda. The days grew Into weeks. "Why do you alwnys call nt fhe telegraph ofllce?" Hilda asked one day, after he had announced Ids Intention of heading (he car that way. "I am expecting a wire from New York," be answered. "New York!" she exclaimed. In sur prise. "Are you from Now York?" "Yes. Is (here anything strange about that?" "No, but I thought It strange that you had never mentioned It before. I have been under the Impression that your home wns here." "I wns never here until the day I met you." "Will the wire call you back?" she asked. "Yes." "Why hasn't It come before?" "Recause of a woman." "Your wife?" she asked In alarm. "No, It is just a woman who has caused a big change In my plans. It Is because of her I found time to come here." "That's strange! It's because of n man I am here. A man I have never met. either, but he Is a hateful man. "Tell me about him." he invited. "It wouldn't interest you," she said, frying to make him think there wns n mystery. He did not speak until he halted his car in front of the telegraph ofllce, and then it wns only a few curt words. He entered the office and returned in l few seconds with an envelope In his hands. A lump rose in her throat ns she noticed it nnd realized that their companionship wns to he broken. "Does it say you are to go?" she in quired eagerly. He had meant to net offended, but her tone won him over. "I'll read ft," he said, ns he pulled It open. He read It aloud: "No word from Geraldine. Have secured star to take pnrt. Come back at once. Dixon." "Oh," she cried, "is that from Char ley Dixon?" He did not nnswer, hut she knew It was, "I am Coraldina Lewis, nnd I ran away sooner thnn piny n love scene with you. I was told you were old nnd homely." "And here we've been playing love scenes for a couple of weeks," he laughed. "Yes," she blushed, "but let's drive some place else. We nre standing up In the cnr nnd must look very foolish." "Walt until I wire Dixon," Ronald snid, ns he jumped from the car. The wire that Dixon received made j him think somebody had gone crazy, for It read: "Fire that star. I have vowed never to make 'love to another woman hut Geraldine Lewis. Congrat ulate us," nnd It was signed "Stevens." Dixon took some time to figure out what It nil meant, but It dawned upon him. "He's married her !" he exclaim ed, when they nrrived nt the studio the next day. Practice "Safety First." Many a boy and girl has found only grim disappointment when seeking n short cut to any desired goal. The short cuts to prosperity are so full of pitfalls and hummocks thnt the wise traveler decides to stick to his motto. "Safety First," nnd take the long way round. It's the shortest, at that, just as the proverb says. For the short cuts aren't throurh "cuts," like tunnels through moun j.iis nnd such things; nnd the hummocks hnve to be climbed over and the pitfalls scrambled out of there Isn't a minute gained, nnd there nre some losses far worse than losses of time. Standard Specific. Some facetious persons want to know what we polish the seat of our pants with to make them so bright and shiny. It's no "get-slick-qulck" preparation, but an Intangible and naturnl element known as tempi at trltus. Houston Post. us all back with a jerk to the old wet days. Here is a new danger to our sober nnd happy manhood. I write this to wnrn mother thnt she must keep her eye on the paregoric bottle. Pnregor Ic, I am told, is well endowed with nl cohol. While the baby may need It, father Is at no time entitled to Its benefits, If, any. A paregoric spree Is one of the most Irresponsible adven tures In the world. If the home bottle Is unprotected, I fear that father Is likely to show up some evening bois terously and unreasonably happy. G. M. F., in Seattle Post-Intelligencer. Planning Wis Career. Seven-year-old Robert has a great desire to follow In his father's foot steps. One night his mother overheard him making this prayer : "Please, God, make me a good boy, then a good law yer, nnd then just land me on the su preme bench. Amen." Boston Tran script. Statistics show that 75,167,672 gross tons of Iron ore were mined In the United States last year. ONE-ARMED GOLFERS MATCH FOR SOLDIERS' ATHLETIC FUND 1 " jv :. ti 1 i . hJPfi lilt k mm w " VIiT?'.Tt. rtrfn HMMp" h-"rttV?fftm'laJ,'i .1 t..W.i.WWII;V,rillnrtlt.annir In n sensational match at the Raysido links, Arthur Lyons, the one armed player of the RriurclilTe Golf club, defeated Louis Martueell, the one nrnied player of the South Grange Field club, one up. The game was played for the benefit of the committee on training camp activities, which will use the proceeds to purchase athletic material for the soldiers. On the left Mr. Lyons fs shown driving off and Mr. Martueell Is shown making a swing ut tin; right. WW INDIANS LOSE TWO The Indianapolis team, al ready crippled by the Jumping of several players who have gone into siime war work, lost two more when First Raseman Clarence Covington and 1'itchor Jean Dale were called for Imme diate army service. To replace Dale the dub has secured a young pitcher named Stewart from the St. Louis l'.rowns. MWWWWV9WWJW9W HURLER TESREAU HAS JUMPED GIANT TEAM : T- Photo lv :::::.: ' : watern newspaper l o'mi "Jeff" Tesrenu. who came to the New Yyrk National league baseball club as a pitcher from the Texas league in 1910, left the club the other day to jolu the Relhleliem club of the Steel league. John R. Foster, secretary of the New York club, said that Tesreau recently told Manager MeUrnw he was "disgust ed with baseball and wanted to get In to some other business." Tesreau, ac cording to Foster, is In class 4 of the draft, so that his change was not actu ated by desire to escape military serv ice. OVERTIME TILTS THIS YEAR Daylight Saving Law Mainly Responsi ble for Two 19-lnning Games Played So Far. I'erhups before the present season ends all records In the major league for lengthy games will be broken. Al ready there have been two 19-lnning draws. The law which saves an hour of day light is mainly responsible, for It per mits a game to go along until decided. The Phils and Cardinals started their 19-lnning game nt 3:30 o'clock nnd played until eight o'clock. This would have been totally impos sible In previous years. Chief Umpire Quigley called the game on account of darkness at the end of the nine teenth inning. It is rather question able whether he wns justified in call ing the game off. The teams could have battled one or two Innings longer and a decision might have been reached, making it unnecessary to re play the game. As it Is the four hours nnd thirty minutes of desperate piny went for naught. STEVE BRODIE IS IN FRANCE Veteran Ball Player Is Coaching Sol diers in Pershing's Army in Fine Points of Game. Walter (Steve) Brodie, veteran ball player, has been heard from in France, where, under the auspices of the Y. M. C. A., he Is coaching the soldiers of Pershing's nrmy In the fine points of baseball. Brodie was a member of the famous old Orioles of the nineties. Millers Sign Cuban Hurler. Louis Palmero, Cuban, formerly In the Southern league, has been signed to pitch for the Minneapolis club of the American association. He re places Mutt Williams, who has en tered military service. One In Many. A new addition to the baseball team at the Bethlehem steel plant Is the veteran Cy Seymour. One thing they can't say ngnlust Cy he did not Join the steel league to dodge the draft. He will play the outfield for Tom Keady's molders. PLAY EXCITING BASEBALL STORIES for the Indians, and looks better every day. Waiter Pipp limy lie drawn In the draft soon. Swede Rlsberg Is showing niurked improvement at the plate. Catcher Harry Glenn of the St. Paul Saints has been culled by the draft. Harry Weaver has reported to Mana ger Mitchell that he has Joined the navy. Harry Heitman continues to pitch winning ball for Arthur Irwin's Rochester club. Rube Parnham seems to find the In ternational league easier than the American association. It Is estimated that BOO professional baseball players of organized clubs have joined the colors. Willinm Finn of Boston has been chosen to bend the Fordhaiu college baseball team next season. Most of the heavy hitters In bih the Nationnl and American leagues are members of Eastern clubs. Pitcher Kester I. June of the Univer sity of West Virginia has reported to the Cleveland American league club. Des Moines announces that It has secured Adrian Lynch from the Wash ington club to fill out its pitching staff. Ed Pfeffer of the Robbing Is pitching Sunday games in the Chicago Cfty league. He Is nt the Grent Lakes na val training station. Pittsburgh picked up three players from fhe Southern association, Out fielder Southworth and Pitchers Coin stock and Slapnickn. With Byrd Lynn gone Into war work the White Sox are using Otto Jacobs, minor leaguer of several years' experi ence, ns a warm-up catcher. Fred Mitchell is nmking a strong bid to swipe George Stallings' "Miracle" shoes. George has 'em tied in a hard knot and Is stepping out a bit himself. Guy Morton Is on a fair way to es tablish a real comeback after nil the trouble he has had wllh his arm. The member is showing no effects of the old injury. In the Mobile-Chattanooga game of June 20 Johnny Bates, leading off for Mobile, walked five times, every time up, which probably is u record or at least a tie. There will be no hunting trips for major leaguers next fall. The hunt ing season Is open in Europe, though, and they can get nil the action they want "over there." G rover Lowdermllk, who lwil been depended on for so much by the St. Louis club this yenr, had no sooner be gun to get his arm In, shape than he was taken down with stomach trouble. Dutch Leonard of the Boston Red Sox, who married after the pnssnge of the draft law, has been notified by his draft board at Fresno, Cal., that he has been moved from class 2 to class 1. Ray Chapman, shortstop of the Cleveland Indians, is making records for getting to first. In the recent Cleveland-Washington series he reached first base In nine consecutive times at but. Ernie Koob, former pitcher of the St. Louis Browns, and Harry Glenn, catcher of the St. Pauls, comprise the battery of the Overland Aviation school. They expect to sail for France before snow flies. Baseball teams representing various government plants, East and West, fol lowing out the idea of encouraging competitive sports as a recreation, may meet In the championship series between the two leading nines of the two lengues at the end of the season. Many former major and minor league plavers are members of the teams. KEYSTONE POSITION ON GIANTS HOODOOED Tough Luck Has Stood in Path of Four Second Basemen. Herzog Couldn't Get Along With Mo. CrawDoyle Was Taken III Niehoff Breaks Leg Joe Rod riguez Does Not Fit In. The second base Job on the New York (ilanls must be hoodooed. Tough luck In one form or nnother has stood In the path of four players who hnve held down the keystone po sition for McGruw during the past two years. If the Job Isn't hoodooed, What Is It Ruck Herzog has trfed holding down Hie position for McGraw several times. And Buck nnd that said job did not get along. Early last season, nftet he had been brought back to the Giants for the third time, Ruck slipped on the floor of the Pennsylvania sta tion while en route to Philadelphia with (lie team and received severe In juries. His condition has never been the same since that accident, and yet It wasn't that alone which caused Mc Graw to dlsposo of him. for, in addi tion, he failed to get along with the Giant lender. ' Next In line ciwue Larry Doyle, brought back to the New York club via Chicago and Boston. Larry went grent guns for several weeks nfter the season opened. He led the league In batting and e was going like a ma chine In the field. Suddenly he wns taken ill and had to undergo an oper ation. Wllh Doyle out of it, McGrnw pur chased Bert Niehoff from the St. Louis Cardinals, mid Just ns the team wns getting ready to leave Philadelphia to return to the Polo grounds ufter a long und disheartening trip in the western half of the circuit Niehoff broke his leg. Joe Rodriguez, the Cuban Infielder, has played the keystone sack on nnd off for the Giants all season, but Joe doesn't hnve the best of luck In the ib, for though he works harder to make good than any other man whe ever held the sack down be can't make himself fit Into the combination. The members of the (Hants them selves nre beginning to think thnt the second basing Job Is jlnxed to a fare-vou-well and no one enn blame them. ARMY'S GRIDIRON "TANK TRACTOR," IS GRADUATED The navy need fenr Elmer Ollphnnt no longer. The nnny's big gridiron "tank tractor," who lias been the Nem esis of the Annapolis tars for several years, was graduated from the military academy. The nrmy, however, still hns such men as "Gene" Vldal nnd "Bull" Van degraif left to hurl Into the brench 11 fate ever decrees nnother meeting on the gridiron with the navy lads. UNIQUE PRANK OF BASEBALL Sam Jones of Cleveland Indians Has Distinction of Striking Out Mighty Tris Speaker. Sam Jones, who figured In the trnde by which Tris Speaker became a mem ber of the Cleveland team, has the dis tinction of being the first right-handed pitcher to strike out the heavy-hlttlng outfielder this year, and the second Boston pitcher to turn the trick since Speaker became a member of the In dians. It was the fourth time Speake has struck out this season and the sec ond time Umpire Owens hus called the third strike on him. Yank Catcher Drafted. Catcher Herold Ruel of the New York American leugue baseball club lias been ordered by the draft boarc In St. Louis to report at Jefferson Bar racks, Mo. trtrbirCrbirCrbtrCrkirh&ti-CrCrCrCrCrirCi MAYER FOR JACOBS Discussing the swop of Mayer for Jncobs, one Philadelphia sport scribe says: "Mayer's re fusal to ublde by Moran's and the catcher's signs was his big gest handicap. In pinches he was prone to pitch carelessly. It Is expected that he will do better In Pittsburgh. Mayer Is twenty-eight years old and Joined the Phils In 1912. His best season wns In 1915, when he won 21 games and lost 15.. In 1910 he won 7 nnd lost 7, and last yenr he won 11 nnd lost 0." trtrtrCrCrttirCrtrtrtrCrtrl Carries Ball to Trenches. Mike Menaskey, formerly of Wash ington, now In the American nrmy In France, has written a friend In Wash ington that he has been in the front line of battle and hasn't had much time to play baseball, but carries a ball with him all the time and plays toss with it wlieu he finds Uinu. kP" r-M v- mmtM.mlt si it -&fwSh. if 1 ii J: CAP THE COMFORTABLE LIE. "Don't you worry when your hus band Is out late at ulglitV" "No. He can take care of himself." "But do you lake his explanations without cavil?" "Yes. I've got to the point where I'd rather have him tell me a pleas ant lie nnd let me go back comfortably to sleep than to gel the truth and have to stay uwake the remainder of the night worrying about him." So Very Particular. Mrs. Myles I suppose they are particular at the boarding school where your daughter attends? Mrs. Styles Oh, yes, very. "No young men ever allowed to call there?" "Never. Why, even the days the nshnian cnlls they blindfold nil the girls!" Not a Fair Audience. Miss Sue Bretto And did you have a fair audience at your play last night? Foofcllghto Nothing fair about It. They hissed. The Hot and Cold of It. Nell Will Is always telling me of his burning love. Belle That's nothing. Jack is nl wuys treating me lo lee cream. No Reason. Father And what is your reason for aspiring to my daughter? Suitor I I hnve no reason I'm in love I AS HE WAS TOLD. "Now, Freddy, I have asked you twice, nnd if you don't answer I'll spank you. Did you say thank you to the man that gave you that candy? "Well er pop I did. But lie told me not to mention It." In the Country. "Are you on good terms with your city relations, Mr. Rural?" "Yes, but they don't seem to he on good relations with my terms." Had Him Well Trained. "Thut's a hard-working man you've got Working In your garden," snid the near-sighted neighbor. "Why, that's my husband." "Really? Why, I thought It wns a hired man." "You don't suppose I could mnke any man work ns hard as that but my husband, do you?" Symptoms. Mrs. Bacon Do you think by any chance the baby will grow up to be left-handed, dear? Mr. Bacon I hope not. Why do you ask that question?" "Because he's always trying to put the toes of his left foot In his mouth." Catty Comment. "Miss Bertha says she has such an elastic nature." "I suppose that Is why she does so much rubbering." Appearances. Appearances, we read In books, To great deception often lead. Potatoes are not much for looks, But they are friends in time of need. A Sense of Satisfaction. "Your wife says you made a great hit nt her pnrty." "Yes," answered Mr. Cunirox. "I couldn't have done better. My man ners were so dignified and perfect sev eral people thought I was the new butler we're bragging about." One Reason. "Why are yon opposed to your wife's voting?" ' "Because, judging from her house cleaning orgies, she will go In for too many sweeping, reforms." Booming Business. "The doctor advised me to get an automobile, as the outdoor exercise would cure me." "The doctor Is foolish." "No, he Isn't. He gets double rates for surgical visits." Too Strenuous. "I once beard a lazy man say he wouldn't mind being the hero of a' novel." "I see the riolnt. I'll bet he. wouldn't want to be the hero of a moving picture." URGES STICKING TO BUSINESS Physician Asserts That Too Carly Re tirement of Successful Business Men Is a Mistaken Policy. To old men who are thinking of re tiring from tictive business Dr. Wil liam ,L Robinson, editor of the Medi cal Critic and Guide, gives the cole bralod advice once tendered by Punch "lo young people about to marry," namely, "Don't!" The coun sel often given to those of advancing years, even by physicians, to take things "easier," to give up fills and give up thai in short, to load ii dull, empty, vegetable existence, Is unipial ifiodly bad, Doctor Rohlusou lliluks, although, of course, there are excep tions mid special cases. lie writes: , "An old in ti ii with u very high blood pressure I. e high for his age should not engage In business which is likely to cause him great excite ment nnd throw him In fits of anger; und a man who Is showing symptom!' of senile di'iiiotitla should not be In (rusted with Important afl'nlrs; but generally speaking, there is no rea son why a man should give up hi' work or narrow the circle of his In terests, merely because he has cele brated the seventieth or eightieth an niversary of his birthday. The gen eral condition of the man. his Illness, should he the criterion, and not' his age In years. We all know I hat some people at sixty are actually older than some are at seventy or eighty. "The advice to old men to retire has sometimes, If followed, very dis astrous consequences. A man of sev enty or eighty Is attending to bis pro fession or business In u satisfactory . manlier, and be feels well. Suddenly he decides or Is advised to retire and take things 'easy' for the rest of his days. He does and In u few weeks or months that man Is a physical or mental wreck and ruin. As long as ho kept up his mental Interests be was all right. A sudden change, a sudden vacuum, I might say, perhaps the pernicious subconscious feeling that now it Is all over for him ail that contributed to the dlsnstoa And It Is not the physical change so much ns the mental that. Is the important factor. I, for one, am sure that men tal activity, mental interest, lias a life-prolonging Influence, because mental nctlvlty stimulates many, if not all, of our vital processes. It Is not mental work that ever kills; It Is worry that does It, and even Its baneful influence has been greatly ex aggerated. We know of octogena rians whose lives have been one round of trouble." Great Home Army. More than 2,400,()(0 boys ami girls wore reached through club work last year, according to a compilation re cently muile by the United States de partment of agriculture, which super vises this work in co-operation with state agricultural colleges. Of this number approximately :S50,000 made complete reports, which show that they produced and conserved products amounting to .$10,000,000. In the S3 Northern nnd Western states S40,(!0( boys and girls were enrolled, of this number 100,025 made complete reports and produced and conserved products valued at S:-S,700,0OO. In the South there were 1 15,7-15 boys enrolled In the regular work, who produced prod ucts valued at $4,500,000, and 73,tt0 girls, who produced and conserved products valued at $1,500,000. In the emergency club work in the South the club leaders reached over 400.000 boys and approximately 1,000.000 girls, who produced and conserved products val ued nt more than $4,000,000. 1 "Stocking Room" for Banks. Has your bank u stocking room? The Security bank of Oakland, Cal., couldn't sell Liberty bonds without theirs. Here Is how It works: Mrs. Ouklauder enters. "I want to buy a Liberty bond, please "All right; sign here," says the pleasant bank clerk. After this the good woman hesitates, blushes. She makes wavering passes and then looks around with a hunting and hunted look. The pleasant bank clerk knows the symptoms and politely Inquires: "Would you like to use the stocking room?" Mrs. Onklunder retires to the little side room nnd makes u run on "the first national bank." Veteran Proud of Standing. Edward P. Weaver, formerly of Bangor, Me., claimed the distinction the other day of being the oldest offi cer yet graduated from tiie free gov ernment navigation school conducted by the United States shipping board recruiting service. He Is sixty-nine years of age. Mr. Weaver, who hod many years' experience as a seaman, decided while at New Orleans some weeks ago to enter one of the schools nnd train for n, deck officer for the merchant marine. He passed the rigid physical test without difficulty and completed the course. Canadian Emphasis. By the bye, don't be shocked by our damning and swearing. It doesn't mean the same in Canada as It does over here. It's natural to us. In Canada everyone swears. My little boy he was six years of age at the time was swearing one dny In the kitchen and the cook told him if he was not care ful his teeth would drop out. He looks up at her only six years of age, mind you nnd says, "Daddy's teeth haven't dropped out!" What do you think of that? Gen. Alec McDougall, Canadian Forestry Corps, In London Chronicle Interview. Barley Long Known to Man. Barley was originally a wild grass of western Asia. It Is believed to be the most ancient cultivated vegetable food of mankind. . Three varieties of the grain have been found In the pre historic lake dwellings of Switzerland, dating back to the Stone Age. Countor Question. She "How do I know you are not marrying me for my money?" He "If It comes to that, how do I know you nre not marrying me t:o reform me?" Boston Transcript.