The Tacoma times. [volume], January 27, 1912, Image 4

About The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949

Image provided by: Washington State Library; Olympia, WA

                
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WHI I |« \circttlatlon Dept. Main 783,
*-'■* V*l Editorial . Dept. Main 1 704.
OFFICK—77B-778 COMMERCE BT.'X
Story About a Tooth
-; ' Ray Cox, a 13-year-old Ohio boy. shot himself through the nose
while trying to shoot out an aching tooth, and the newspaper wits
are making fun about it Sounds silly, too, doesn't it? But, hold
on, Mr. Man! you were just as silly when a boy. y X-.
Do you remember that time when you had the whole Second
Class, Primary Grade, following you about in envy of that loose
"milk tooth" that was Jumping about In your JawT Of course you
do. Why, doggone lt, you were so proud over that tooth which the
other boys didn't have that you fairly strutted home from school and
you counted that boy blessed above his fellows whom you "let feel
how loose lt was." XiXyy'' .- _, _■'.
Silly? : Why, on the way home, Tommy Smith persuaded you
that the painless way to pull a tooth was to tie one end of a string
to the tooth and the other end to a stone and let Tommy Smith give
the stone a good throw. Remember how that stone raised you on
four toes with a yell, and came untied and left you with that tooth
lust dancing the can-can in your face? 'Course you do. .
And when you got home holding your Jaw with both hands, Sis
ter Mary convinced you that the only painless way to draw a "milk
tooth" was to tie one end of a string to it and t'other end to a door
knob, and let Sister Mary slam the door when you weren't looking,
knd you know mighty well that you looked, and when the jerk came,
and that tooth still stuck, you opened your face with roars so that you
couldn't look at anything.
Silly? Why, it wasn't an hour later before Brother Willie came
ln and converted you to the belief that the only way to palnlesssly
pull a "milk tooth" was to tie one end of a string to lt, t'other end
to a brick, and let Brother Willie drop the brick Into the well with
out your knowledge. Remember how the heaven and the earth
imacked together when that string snapped and that tooth went to
putting In extra licks? 'Course you do! And you kicked little Willie,
kicked little Willie plenty and promiscuous, and mother came out,
grabbed you by the arm and started for that awful place, the den
tist's, where you knew a strong man with horrible pinchers stood
yearlng for sore teeth to come along. And lo! on the way, that
tooth dropped out, and you fain would gambol like a lambkin that
had escaped the slaughter.
Silly? Why, man. you were twice as silly as that Ohio boy, for
It Is a fact that one can get rid of a tooth by firing a rifle bullet
against It, while the schemes you once tried were all based on credu
lity. Age'gives us wisdom only as we progress thorugh failure and
suffering.
Alas! a whole lot of us are even yet trying to get rid of what
hurts us by tying an old piece of string to it and letting others do
the rest. S
Woodrow Guilty, All Right
Col. Henri Watterson repudiates Woodrow Wilson. Col. Harvey
pulls down the Wilson banner from Harper's Weekly. Col. Melville
Stone fills the Associated Press with accounts of other colonels,
majors, sergeants and privates who suddenly don't like Woodrow. It
looks like "Insurgency," and Big Business chortles over the idea that
Wilson boom ls petering out, for Big Business truly, honestly,
sacredly fears Woodrow Wilson most of all.
Brer Watterson puts the charge against Wilson In these words:
"I have little room to doubt that Wilson is not a man who
makes common cause with his political associates, or is deeply sen
sible of bis political obligations."
Now, we haven't even "the little room to doubt" that makes
Watterson fold his tent and refuse the nomination to Wilson. On
the contrary, we are convinced that Woodrow Wilson is the very
fellow to refuse to "make common cause with his political associ
ates" as against the common cause of the common people. We don't
'believe that Woodrow has a particle of sense of "political obliga
tions," or needs any.
Nor can we work up any tears because of Woodrow's alleged
shortcomings ln these respects. - On the contrary, we love him for
his kicking of "political associates" and admire him because he seems
to have no sense of political obligation to anyone, save the plain
people, meaning us nnd about 90,000,000 others.
Just now the democratic party seems to be nilin' with that old
time trouble, colonel's colic. Too many colonels in her midst. Cols.
Watterson and Harvey and Hearst and others are taking up matters
where Cols. Brlce, Oliver Payne, Whitney and McLean left off, trying
to lead a great party named democratic around by the nose.
Not Corruption, Just Investment
"No evidence of corruption," says the U. S. senate sub-commit
tee, in the case of Senator Stephenson; notwithstanding that the office
cost Stephenson a sum 'way up toward $200,000.
The evidence simply showed the high cost of a senatorshlp, and
the case leaves in our mouths that bad-tasting question —Why are
rich men willing to pay such vast sums fora chance to make the
laws for us?
OBSERVATIONS
COUNCILMAN BI TTFIELD of North Plalnfield, N. J., wants
worklngmen excluded from living in his town. Says it costs $26 a
year to school a child, and worklngmen average three children per
family. If Buttfleld studies economics hard enough, he'll likely get
around to solving the problem by killing off the children.
AGRICULTURAL depatrment has classified 245 different kinds
of cheese beside limburger, which Is in a class by itself.
WE gather from Mr. Woodrow Wilson's estimate that Cousin
Bill Taft is honest and patriotic but almighty stupid.
FRISCO society is to paralyze N. Y. society with an oriental ball
at which Mrs. Templeton Crocker will wear mauve trousers, her ma
pink trousers, Jennie Crocker green trousers and the rest of society
trousers to match its complexion. If those oriental trousers tackle
the oriental "turkey trot" dance, It'll be worth fine and Imprisonment
to break into that ball.
♦-> ' BRYAN ls North Dakota democrats' second choice. It's the
blooming second choices that keep the situation all scrambled up.
WICKERSHAM announces that the objections to Hook's ap
pointment as U. S. supreme Judge are groundless. Hook feels the
same way, which ought to be sufficient endorsement for Bill Taft
One corporation lawyer more or less on that bench won't give us a
Harlan. If It would, you can bet that Taft would duck it.
SAN JOSE jury has decided that a stableful of jackasses Is not
A disturber of the peace of society. If you ever heard a San Jose
society girl manual labor a piano, you'd know why that Jury was
•heritable toward jackasses.
OOATES CO., the thread-makers, declared a dividend of 35 per
cent ID 1911.
THE MARKETS
■*****■** Ammmmmm ,~~^___^^ _. _ a j
>. Washington creamery batter not expect to have much Eastern
flame down in price yesterday, butter until some time ln March'
■astern butter is Just as scarce Eggs also took a drop of I c nt
M It was yesterday. Jobbers do yesterday.
PRICKS PAIS PRODUCER.
Apples—sl.s3o2 a box. "" Beef—loc. *
Lemons— 3 03.75. Pork9® 10c.
Cranberries—lo® 12c. Onionssl.2s® 1.50
I Oranges—s2® 2.75. 'Oysters— $7.50 per sack
i Potatoessl.Bool.so. Clams—s2.so a sack
Sweet Potatoes —$3 03.50 owt. Crabs—slol.7s do*
Beans—3 0 «c. ' • Batter
Crntps $1 sack. Washington Creamery gift
ttuce—sl.2s crate. $80,
Cabbagel hi 01% c. . Eastern—3l 8 2
'Spinach, 1 1-1«. ':_£«».
Chicken—l4a. Washington Ranch —30c
Editorial Paae of €ftc Caeoroa Cimes
"I hope you won't be hard on me, Judge," he said. "You see,
I was under the influence of liquor when I done It." "•
"You seem to have been under the Influence of something equal-;
ly bad when you studied grammar. During the spare moments that |
you are going to have, permit yourself to indulge in judicious study
of the construction of simple sentences. Here is one to begin with
—sixty days." „;;
HIS OWN PROVISION ' ''.X'
The committee had called to suggest government by commission
to Nero, and that eminent ruler listened attentively and smiled ap
provingly. *"\'
"lt looks good to me," he said, "providing, of course, I am the
commission."
Whereupon the committee laughed diplomatically and withdrew.
—Cleveland Plain Dealer. '". I
■&"mmt .m m m S» mmm ■■■ mm J\mjl—
BVIBERTOK Wilfl X>
Mr. Jack Frost is a nice chap to know,
When you've got a warm house to abide in,
And It's jolly, no doubt, to go out ln the snow
When you have a warm cutter to ride ln.
But down In the slums when his hand's on the pans
He isn't a blessing—he's only a bane.
Mr. Jack Frost's a society swell.
• To the rich he is Joyous and cheerful,
But down where the shivering ghetto-folks dwell
• His visage is bitter and fearful.
When empty the coal bin and empty the purse
His laugh is a snarl and his glance is a curse.
When plenty Is yours and your body well fed
Mr. Jack Forst Is your crony,
But when you are down, why the snob cuts you dead
With a glance that Is icy and stony!
He blesses and blights with the very same breath.
To Wealth be ls Life— and to Poverty, Death!
LITTLE IRRITATIONS OF LIFE
OUTBURSTS OF EVERETT TRUE
JUDICIAL ADVICE
, PIGS'f
Aityffiii&
HEARD AT THE RUSH HOUR.
"Move a little faster, please!
'Way up in the car! '
Come on, there, don't block the I
. door, .
Whod'y'u think you are?' 1
"All aboard, take this car north! j
'Let 'em off there, you!
And forget that fresh talk, iboob, '
Gimme something new."
"You want a West-side car, you
say? ■
Just listen to the gink;
Why don't you stop and think?"
I
The conductor mopped his sweaty ',
brow ,
And (balance on his toes, . ]
"Sometimes thees runs are fierce," i
he said.
"But that's the way it goes." i
i
"If ever I get off this car '
I'm golnig to find a job
On some deserted island
Where there is no street car
molb."
HAD SEEN THEM.
TeacherXow can anyone tell
me where the stars come from?
"Please, ma'am," answered the:
tiniest of the class, "they come
from the sidewalk."
"All life originally came from a
microscopic dot," claim the scien
tists. There are still a lot of peo
ple who haven't risen above the
period.
A New York man left his wife
a handsome estate provided she
did not take the advice of her
relatives "In financial or other af
fairs." It's a ciuch that man had
a mother-in-law.
The Tamplco, Mexico, oil fields
produced 100,000 barrels of oil
' dally. Hut that's nothing compar
, ed to the amount of "salve" a few
good politicians can produce in
the same length of time.
There was a man and he struck a
L match
On the wall In a powder mill,
And now the mill (and match
, he struck
And the man are very still.
> A cannon's report has been
heard at a distance of 14 6 miles.
But that wasn't our own Joe Can
|non. When he made a report to
• the house the whole United States
heard it.
Cigars are part of an Italian
I soldier's dally rations. They
ought to be able to smoke out an
' enemy all right.
SPEAKING OF SMOKE.
Youi oan have your gold-tipped
Meerschaum
And your polished Calabash.
I'll take my little clay duglne
Which cost five cents in cash.
Tins FALSE ALARM.
Often In the silly night a creak
ing door gives us a fright.
THE TRUAXT.
I tried to run away from things,
I wandered far and wide,
Myself was at my side.
It was no gowhere'er I went
UPLIFT STUFF.
Bunch your boosts, boy.
Don't get In the hajblt of loaf
lug in your own shadow.
Memory gives man an altar.
Love never suspends dividends.
Courtesy 5s an Invitation to
others to 'be nice to you.
The man who is sure of his
opinion seldom fights for it.
No man's destiny comes to him
full grown.
Prominent women assert that!
the trouble is that marriages take;
place before the parties are well i
enough acquainted with each!
other. But a longer acquaintance
would make marriage impossible I
nine cases out of tan.
Some men don't keep up with
tho times any better than an en
cyclopedia. I
Farmers don't have the fun
i hey used to have In the days
when the automobile was afraid
of a crumpled-horn cow.
Slavery was supposed to have
been abolished 40 years ago, but
folks can still (buy books on the
installment .plan.
A man always feels a hit su
perior when some homeless pup
follows him home. And well he
nay.
Self preservation is a law of
nature, and many people know
what to preserve themselves In.
No man believes ta compensa
tions when he spills a bag of ap
ples on the street car.
. Red Cross Ball Blue makes the
laundrese happy, make* clothes
whiter than snow. If you wish
beautiful, cle^r white clothes, use
'ted Cross Ball Blue. At all good
;rocers. / *•♦
Shur On
Eye Glasses are Best.
HAVES
4th Floor Fidelity Bldg.
Will Taft Turn Sloan Loose On Arizona
Again? Why State Cries Recall of Judges
PRESCOTT, Aril., Jan. 27. —
The war ls not over In Arisona.
The people have won their consti
tution, secured statehood and
elected a progressive government.
But there still remains that men
ace —the federal judge, who can,
by a stroke of the pen, wipe out
half the benefits of this constitu
tion, and in spite of their dear
bought victories - keep the people
ln bondage to Big Business.
Big Business long ago laid Its
wires and got the promise that
THEIR kind of a ma» should be
appointed. It is common knowl
edge in Arizona that Richard
Sloan, the present governor, ls
slated for this Judgeship by Presi
dent Taft. Sloan has the "rail
road mind" and the "mining
mind."
This danger explains the sud
den demand for the "advisory re
call of federal Judges" which at
tained such popularity In the re-
Abort ffeople
One of the most popular of the
matrons In Greek official society '
at Athens is
: Mme. Coromll- j
as, the daughter '
of former Sena
tor Cockrell of.
. Missouri. She 1
I married the'
present Grecian .
minister of fin
ance when he '
was at Wash
ington as the •
representat I v c :
of the king of i '
Greece. She is
one of the few j
. American girls •
' .who have made
;: good at foreign'
Mine. Coroinllas capitals.
• « *
Such a spendthrift is John D.
Archbold Standard Oil multi
millionaire. He gave the church
of his native village a $100 organ.
♦ • *
James Kennedy was sentenced
to jail for one year in a New York
court for stealing an umbrella on
a rainy day.
TODAY IN HISTORY
Jan. 27, 1862, Just 50 years
ago today. President Abraham
Lincoln dissatis
fied with the
Inactivity of the
army of the Po
tomac, Issued
his general war
order Xo. 1, fix
ing Washing
ton's birthday,
Feb. 22, as the
day for a gener
al movement of
the land and
naval forces of the United States.
Of course, Washington's birthday
was a holiday then, but the coun
try where the soldiers were going
had seceded and national holidays
were not observed by the army.
How I Got Back My Strength
(By A. WELLMAN.)
■ "Those are the worst symptoms of weakness." said "I will heartily recommend your appliance to any
Dr. Soakem, after I had told nim of my condition. man suffering from weakness, and you have my per-
I had come to his office hoping to get something mission to make any use of this letter you wish,
that would relieve me of the suffering which took all "B. x. BEALE
pleasure out of my life. My back was weak and pain- "Prop. 'The Arden," Anaheim, CaL"
ful, my head ached, I was nervous and had no energy • » • •
or ambition. The loss of power was sapping my vital- "I am happy to tell you that for some time past
lty, and I knew that I was getting worse every day. I have been completely cured of the rheumatism I
Hera la some medicine that will had ln my legs. The pains I suf
fix you up, said Dr. Soakem. "This _-*__. __(w*3V. • fered were very severe, due to)
stimulant will give you energy and __«_W_S3W ©sfei<^L exposure. I also had lumbago,
take away that tired, debilitated J£l,3Bm4m mCmLmSk. and that, too. has been cured. I
feeling of which you complain. The ._fi_i_A T___fm would not have missed the euro
other Is for your nerves; lt will stu- ' AJAkMA. «_____. Klectra-Vlta haa effected for
pefy them so you can't feel any pain. t__aßfl__E_r_l Km five times what the appliance
"You will find directions on wfi Mi 'A ___*33__L cost mc." i
the bottles, and after you mPW^.X ML iM c- F' WAOKNBI.AAT,,
have used all the medicines WkMAW^lS^ir-^mß^mM^Wk Sisters, Oreg.
you can have the bottles re- ..^oM^^^^^gm^SasM^Wn^oM>^l * * * *
filled at the drug store." ____*&P*£!_______mF i iiWTff7_____flT_irl fOl' Will »ay that I am feeling
* * * A^si^^mS^mS^^^^^S^^^3&mSo much better the past few weeks.
Needless to say, I mad* MX^^^^^^^^^^^^^SmalmM^ I ara rearing the Klectra-Vlta.
many trips to the drug store ■!MW«!feit«'gt««»l^^^ from three to four hours a day
getting those bottles refilled. MI-^M^^^S^-" yW^^k , and think It is do In a good work.
But the medicine "fixed ma mmMjm--mmo^rif«lm^al I feel sure that in a few weeks more I can
up" all right. The first thins; MmajLß^^^o^^iSSS^^ discard it entirely." W. B. WALSH,
it did was to put my stomach I Jft^Bt_>^-a^\W; ~:<'g **■*ti Repawn St., Portland, Oreg.
out of «sear, and my food m?*mo&::.m<'ihi4&mo!&Mr-,iJ.Z>4 m ', ,"
wouldn't digest properly. Ew°a3 K|PH X h"d USd i-,„ *tra,Vlta * Just thirty day-
Ihe smell of tha dope was ■»§&• , -_flr^ *.WSt. '""M Klectra-Vlta just thirty days
nauseating, and the horrible MAgEAmWMfffm ,y-°xMMty'?MA when my strength returned and I found my
taste It left in my mouth was mMllmMmMm'-. ** 3 self free from all pain and weakness. My
worse than v ,a o ga ave pain. __ »_£_-■ .>;'*--t x.y?y-xXI nerve, »-.,» stronger mm* ... power ,-
The stimulant gave me en- " W^^S^Mf nerves grew stronger and my power In
ergy for a while, but after I _§i_L3_ Xli 'X:. '* creased from the very first day under the
had taken it for a few days I MmsX-X * • ____! strengthening, invigorating Influence of elec
had to double tha dosa to get tha __________*i_fa____?* *________■ trictiir t „.„, ,„ „„„ ,i„ v . , „ „.„, ,^,„.
same effect, and it soon failed to do aWSBASK^MAM .in. l want to s,iy '' *. "I , u,at Klco
even that. im&SmWfilSISMm7m?3A tia Vita Is not to be confounded with old
i The nerve medicine relieved all RRY^^tuX'AMfa style electrio belts, Faradio batteries and
P al? » r tonlTo.V ll.'Jow a.. ti m"; BSSS^t-m-'i similar contrivances. It la a self-charged
L Hlt ' n ,f'i^,',. l?,*. l\lXi ir ' l fOUn f*AEffmlS&*oml body battery, which makes Its own power
?/v inff T 2v»rv *m?l* "n\ 0Xi a "*''' r i^ffflfflTlWFr I continuously. There ls nothing to do but
1&, „. ,lmK..,Z"lmnm i' 1 fi? Tm*C- Me&S^IARmW&m adjust It correctly and turn nn the current.
ether, aa tha pain came back each lmsM:(*MMaeMm which enters the nerves In a mild, soothing
'"" • • • r *.i'___i___________r' Wsj'jr'- " atreami It does not shock nor produce any
i *_„., where m would have ended if I had p ,ie,i at unpleasant sensation. Klectra-Vlta 'ft do£
m„td don t know where I would t have ended if I the not Interna while you work and tlTa use of It does
not discovered an advertisement of Electra-Vita. the not interfere with your work or business
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The Information It contain! ls worth a great deal to ? n(J, -? st,,(. 1 treatment. This book contains pictures of
any sufferer we" built robust men and women, illustrating the
. After looking over the book I was convinced that ? th °d applying Electra-Vlta. It Is free to those
Klectra-Vita was Juat what I needed, so I decided to „ '?, _'___, th'a coupon. Cut out tha coupon now and
call at tha office of the Electra-Vlta Co. and have m?, 11 '} J y,O" :an l cal __,
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I found the doctor only too willing to give me all }„ .dr"_o day and Saturday evenings until 8; Sunday,
tha Information desired. Ha showed me a large num- 10 to Hi '. - 1
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Ir^m 7.w, n {?{T.n[,? en ** known for y ears Here 8 04 Majestic 111 rig* Seattle. W«U.
ar"l*a\Tu..dfcra-V.taw.th excellent results In a tra^'book" 11 "* PreP,"d' '""' f"8 ' 9°-page ' "IU"
ease of prostatic trouble, complicated with weakness
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IS this way for If yeara. I tried all kinds of treat- —
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no benefit whatever, the system remaining dormant .....••• "
Sad Weak until Electra-Vlta brought new life and I '
manhood* ' TOWN „ . . .**
< Entered at the postoffice at | Tacoma, Wash.,
as second-class matter. Telegraphic Berrlce
of United Press Association.> - •-i
Published livery Evening Except Sunday by
the Tacoma Times Pobilshliy Oompany.
cent campaign. It is a move to
get some kind of control by the
people. ,
Sloan served as a district fed-
eral judge in Arizona from 1889
to 19 09, with the exception of
three years when he practiced law
in Prescott and was attorney for
the Santa Fe railroad.
Federal Judge Sloan was so well
j thought ef that a provisioned pri
vate car was at his disposal when
he wished to go on a week-end
'hunting or fishing trip.
He became known among work
ing men as "Injunction Dick."
Here are two samples of Judge
Sloan's work on the bench:
Near Prescott are the $100,
--000,000 properties of the United
■ Verde Mining Co., owned by for
mer United States Senator W. A.
Clark, taxed at $40,000, by the
'way. This company wanted a
certain man appointed district at
torney. Their lawyer got caught
bribing a county supervisor to vote
,for this man. The United Verde'
lawyer was arrested. The super
visor confessed having go\en
$500. Judge Sloan dismissed the
case on a technicality. The grand
jury then indicted the lawyer and
Sloan dismissed the case on an
other technicality.
' The court records of Mohave
county will show (If they have not
been destroyed) that in 1907 a
Pullman porter on the Santa Fe
train brutally asaulted a woman
passenger. She was saved by the
train crew. A jury found the
negro guilty, and Judge Sloan In
a scathing opinion sent the negro
to the penitentiary for 14 years
at hard labor, the maximum,
i The woman brought suit against
In the Editor p Mail
Everybody ln Pierce county reads this column. Short
letters from Times readers, of general interest and without
personal malice, will be printed. Write about anything or any.
body you wish, but do not have malice as your motive. Many
letters are uot printed because they ure too long. Keep "era
short.
Chicago, 111., Jan. 22, 1912,
5515 Monroe Aye.
To the Editor of the Tacoma
Times and to Dana Sleeth:
Gentlemen —Allow me the
pleasure of extending my appreci
ation of your splendid Interpre
tation of the recent trial of Jay
Fox — as I wee it In Vol. IX, No. 17.
the Pullman company for $25,000
damages. The company offered to
settle for $2500, but the woman
refused. The Pullman and Santa
Fe lawyers secured a new trial for
the negro. •
Before Judge Sloan the case was
called for trial again. It opened
with a short consultation In low
tunes between Judge, district at
torney and attorneys for the Pull
man and the Santa Fe.
The same Judge Sloan who had ,
sentenced the negro, now dis
charged him, and he was whisked
out of the territory by a waiting
engine.
At the 1908 republican na
tional convention Sloan voted
against every progressive plank
offered by Insurgents—especially
the presidential primary.
In 1909, to the astonishment of
the people of Arizona, Taft made
him governor of the territory,
without a single open public en
dorsement.
In 1910 Sloan was puibllcally
ridiculing the constitution wanted
by the people, and saying if It was -
adopted "that ths territorial _
asylum would have to be en
larged."
In 1911 he had to fight for two
I days In the republican party con
ference, reactionary as it was, for
a platform endorsement of his ad
ministration and Taft's.
| OUR PRECISE ARTIST
"Wanted: A job for an all round
man."
The mutton-chop*style ot whis
ker is becoming obsolete and In a
new generation children will have
to invent now forms of amuse
ment.
The rabbit is Just wise enough
to know that if he had a tall he'd
be just forgetful enough to stick
It In' a trap.
It seems an though the best in
American journalism had or ls
migrating westward. It ib such
an attitude as ls yours that we
may look to for a saner Interpre
tation of instltutionaliam. More
' power to your quest for what's
real.
Yours fraternally,
I FRANK CHESTER PEASE.