The Tacoma times. [volume], August 05, 1915, Page 5, Image 5

About The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949

Image provided by: Washington State Library; Olympia, WA

                
Thursday, August 5,
I Pause to laugh With the Times Fun-Makers
Our Hong Kong Kolum
AND
Talk o' the Times
BY SELAH AND CHINA BOY
mm
■WLOS
VVLO
IN
AMEUCP
M.W IKWIN.
Mins ,\lav Irwin gleat Melican
leddy.
Bin- aliow how leddy act when
p MOISKTOWN MINSTRKLS *
>♦♦«■* «■#**♦«'•s>♦«■»*
MI?TA
MONKEY SHINES
soune—gleat stuff.
She have big hlome in those
one thousand islands up north
count less.
Maybeso neutral—live half Ola
nada half them Tutted Si In .m
She plenty big to do It.
Maybeso she notice two islands
plenty loom to laugh.
Himeby we see.
• • »
STKM AS ll\lt<.\l\ <Ol\Ti:jl
Some Hlase
chickens wear
their gowns :,o
low that th.*y
catch cold in
the wing!
* • •
The guy with
horse sense is
tho kuv who
can say "my"
at tha right
time.
4T I-AST UK KNOW!
A chafing a:*u rs a skillet Hint
has raised itself in Hoclety!
* * •
BOOINMIY XOTK
Don't throw away the old rub
ber washers off the fruit jars.
They make fine gaiters.
MIST IIAVK MOM XOINK
Autopiano and 40 rolls of mu
sic. Will sell or trade lor Ford
car.—Want Ad.
• • •
Some day we are going to wir,
and when the enemy starts drop
ping bombs from the air and
somebody sees one coming and
yells look out, all those bootblacks
are going to get killed. T'.ioy
won't be able to take thtft eyes
off all the business.
VISITOR IX Cm
Miss Vacant Lott, of Turkey
Nob, 1.. 1., :iml Seattle, is a guest
of pretty Miss
Ivory Dome, for
the tennis
champioush 1 ps
at the local
club. Miss I,ott
can guzzle sher
bet and tea
with the best of them even if }he
hasn't hoard that there is a war
in Europe.
When seen this morning by our
saciety cd. she was discussing the
relative merits of green shoes with
pink vamps and pink shoes with
green ones, etc., etc.
WHAT MIGHT HAPPEX
Here is the guy that cruel Col.
Joab wants to relegnte to the
ranks of.the un- s\ .
employed. If Jkr It
tlitt Col has liis /fj BHL.
way this 11iMii v / y/U- ■fr^^Kf*
Is going to ')(J I rtP*""^"^l^^
walking the \r-\ JK
streets within h yt) /l\
f*w days and Urn/ A I I\.
the movie houseb w, tun..;.. »...o
nut tabernacles where peace ad
vocates, creators of foolish city
ordinances, and stlek-their-noses
in-other-pcople's-ljusiness can all
get together and rave on together.
It would be better if this amalga
mated order of pests could he
mobilized and sent to some desert
isle so the town could go to ruin
and let the people have some
peace.
SKI.AH.
PANTAGES
VNKVI'AI'KD VAI'DKVILLE
KI»1l'NI> HAVKS A (X>. IN
"THK IMAXO M()\ KHS"
ITAMAN OI'KKA SK\TKT
it—in i hi; Bl« ACTH— 6
A Married Man's Troubles-and Joys
Stella and Gertie
OUTBURSTS OF EVERETT TRUE
Bhe—The doctor said my hu»
-■inll should have absolute rest.
He—What did you say?
She—l told him that my hus
and wouldn't listen to me and
lie doctor laid that was a very
ood beginning!
THE TAOOMA TIMES
Personal
and
Social
Miss Whtnlfred Brown was
married Wednesday evening at
the Manltou park horn« of her
ulster, Mrs. Morton Eshelman, to
Byron Wehmhoff. Relatives from
this state and Oregon were pres
ent. The bride was attended by
her sister, Mrs. Eshelman, and
the groom by his brother, Lester.
The two became acquainted at
Stadium High. Tfiey will live at
Orandvlew.
Hen Hur picnic, announced for
Sunday, postponed a week.
Open unilrr new management,
DANCING
every Mat. night at Eaflea' hall.
Miiilc by St. Jean's orehewtr*.
Confessions ofa Wife
«t i>t>ri<Klil. IBM, fcf Itonawuprt
I uintilii AsMclatlua)
"Now, Dick, 1 want to tell you
right here, you've got to get over
your grouch and treat Kitty de
cently.
We were in our rooms dressing
for dinner und the theater. Dick
had treated Kitty atrociously, jiint
■pokes to ker and Uiut was all,
when 111' r.llllO In.
"Well, 1 don't like her and
never did, ' be expostulated, "and
jusi now I am m> l>usy that I
(iiii'l.i to he down at the office
with Mr. Selwin, Instead of gala
vantfug aliout with a lot of fnlku
to a ikow. It will probably hore
me tv extinction."
"Did Mr. Selwin ask you to re
main at the office this evening?"
"How would I know he wanted
mo if ho didn't?" Dick evaded.
"That's strange, as Mrs. Selwin
told me this afternoon that Mr.
Selwin never went to the office
after dinner."
"BOM doing a little detective
work on your own account, my
dear?"
When Dick becomes suspicious
and MKMtte, he's the nastiest
mon I know.
"Now look here, Dick Waver
ley. If you think I'm going to
stand any of these ugly questions
you are mightily mistaken. Mrs.
Selwin called me up today and
invited us over to dinner. Said
she was glad you could he so
much with me during this dull
business scutum, and incidentally
remarked that however pressing
businpsß was. Mr. Selwin never
went to the office after office
hours. Now, Dick, you will cer
tainly give me credit for not mix
ing up in your businesa affairs,
but I am not a child, neither am
I a fool, and you have not been
deceiving me in the least with
your excuses of business the last
few weeks when you have been
out night after night, and I have
come to regard your protestations
of affection for me to mean only
one thing, remorse for the way
you have been treating me."
Dick looked at me in a sur
prised manner and started to
■peak.
I "Wait until I'm through. I
don't want to dicker with you,
bihk, nor even ask you questions
about where you are when you
are away tiom me, for the sim
ple reason that I will not live
with a man and quarrel with him
continually. When you are home
I try to make you comfortable,
limply because when you are in
food humor I am more comfort-
Able, but there are times when
iWtlence ceases to be a virtue'
and one of the times Is when you
eoiuo in with that assumed tired
fook on /our face and plead bust-
Eels for leaving me. I'll ac
knowledge that perhaps I haven't
Veen the pleasantest of compan
ions lately, but one of the things
you promised was to care for me
in sickness and in health. How
ever, I think I could excuse a ne
glectful husband easier than I can
one who lies to me."
"But, Margie, I don't He to
you."
"Now, Dick, pleaae don't salve
your conscience with the Idea that
because you tell me part of the
truth whtch leads me to infer
something entirely different that
yen're not lying to me, because
. •**•
(Maybe Tom Speaks From Long Experience.)
(Here's a Twister for People Who Are Supersti
tious!)
you know if you do not. do a
more cowardly thing tliun lie to
yourself thta you Intend to de
cpho inc."
I cniiily wont lo the phone anil
called ui> Jim Kdie. Ah I aaked
lor the lumber, Dick MM, "What
are you going to do, Margie T"
"Say, Jim, Dick finds it iinpo;:
■ibta to iiltcnd my theater pnrty
tonight, mid I don't wai*. to \t«
beaules*, will you find me one."
"Margie are you crazy .' Who
is this man that Jim is getaf, lo
bring?'
".Not a l>lt urazy, and I didn't
really cattffe flip man's name. My
dear, I'm just practicing a few of
yoiu- tactics," and I proceeded to
don my prettiest green evening
Bf'Wii.
(Continued tomorrow. >
All I. O. O. X, RoMmlh and
their 111. -mis are cordially imiied'
to attend a moonlight ilmn nm
pwty Riven by tho entertainment
MMMNtM of the Went Tneoina
1.«.<1m- No. •_"'.*. at I'.iirion Natur
(lny. Auk- 7Mi. Steamer Atiilantu
"ill leave Municipal dock at 7:: to
p. m. TirketH sum |ki couple,
including: boat • ride and dancing,
tin iioni nip nlone twenty-five
cents. Musii furnixlied In Kil
(jore'.s orHie*itra. "adv."
1
Q'&<&'s<s>Q>'s>s>Q><S>Q>®Q>s>3>
$■$><§><$<$■ <S> £, <§■<§<$><$><£<<$ 3><s>
John C. Newell, former Tarj-i
man, age 46; at Sedro-Woolley j
Monday; survived by widow,
three boiib, three daughters,
brother, sister; funeral at 8 p. in.
today, Buekley-KluK'M, Kagles'
auspices; interment Tacoma ceme
tery.
Mrs. O. T. Barrett, of Puyal
lup, last night at a local hospital; !
survived by mother, Mrs. Nellie I
Floyd, of Puyallup.
Mrs. Nellie H. Dowlel, age 43,
this morning at residence in Seat
tle; funeral from Buckley-King's I
at 1:30 Saturday; Interment Ta
coma cemetery.
♦ i t m:h\i.s t,
Oliver S. Odie; today at 10 a.
m.; from C. O. Lynn'B; interment.
Taconia cemetery.
aisuRATED
MAGNesia
Four sour acid stomaclm, Ran and
fermentation of food. A traapoon
ftil tn a fourth 'of a blbsr nf hot
water usually ajlvea INSTANT I!K
--1,1 XT. • 5..1,] by all dniKKlKts In
etthor powder or tablet form at 50
cents per bottle.
RENTON COAL
No Soot
Little Ash
GRIFFIN
TRANSFER CO.
Anto l>eli»ery. »;AIN 580
A WONDER SALEi
Of first quality (iniiiitcwnre ;it I'.iulsuiis". I
Don't miss tfottiiitf your share of these won- M
lerfltl values. ■
4, 5 and G-qt . lirst quality , -
1. •> iiml ti-(|t. lir«l quality I
Granite PreHorve IP** Granite Sauce 4(-_ H
Kettles, choice 100 Pans, choice \oC H
8 and 10-qt. Granite 1E- fefe-^c"-*^ H
Dish Pans IJ U «C!^_l ..'*'33 B
—— l-<|t. Granite Coffee 1C« Hj
or 'I'oa I'otß. cliolrt'. . . IjC I
4, I and 6-qt. Granite Pud- *** H,,i,ler s polWunl in- X
* Hide, cool ventilati-d liaiulle. I
ding or Milk si/cs 7 and 8, 4r. X
Pans, choice IUU choice IOC I
Jffik Extra Special 1
J/lm \^fc ■90 »'Aot'l'M ( M>THi:s WASHKItN I
l-.'iruf si/c. latest Improved, sold by H
"J^* n«i'tits al Mom $2.50 to $.:..,ii. H
VwV Very special for Friday
Some Redhot Bargains in the Grocery Section
for Friday. ■
<HR rAVORITK Mexican Ttllaiii<H>k Full Crewu 0C« B
Mend Coffee, regular SOc re- Clieewe, a Ib. iHt; 2 for UwC I
taller; Friday ape.lal, OC p KWurt ll«*t l>e«i.u« Hutter I
Ten SiriiiiKs or Im.nl.ius. Friday, alb I I O I
Z«l?\l lb:bES, 25c Lf! "Tf.*^ I:.'' 25c I
7 lbs. Best OC* 12 ItMis Savon «C» I
Rolled Oats £JO H<mh> ZQC I
6 II)h. Beit Pancake OC« UH- l'nvoHt« Bottle C n H
Flour £tJC Bliiliik 3C I
4 lbi. Fancy 4C. 8 B»me« BeNt Parlor in.
Japan Rice CO\j Matches IUC ■
Deliveries to all parts of Hie rlty every day. H
PAULSON'S, Inc. I
I'HONE MAIN 233. 11 OS-7 BROAmVAY ■
DKATH9
1 1 Bead the Classified Ads 0* Page 6
PAGE FIVE
By Allman
By "Bert"
I