[\wmmimm9%wmmmmim^
Beyond any question the Squir- *
rel Food in The Times Pink is one %
of the funniest newspaper features 1
being published anywhere. There 9
are a dozen guffaws in erery one of *
them. 1
li>>>ilUilt>>Wtit>lii>ili>i>>li>iitiiiiiii^*
rebels mm MOSCOW
________ _____ '——— — 1. - „ ,
CASEMENT SENTEMCE© TQsffiE HAMGED!
NOOSE
FOR SIR
ROGER!
LONDON", May I. —Sir
linger Casement mis trii-d on
ii charge ni' high treason a
few iluys ago, it MM iin
iiomu'cd tniliiy. Ilnrnn Head
ing presided.
I'nless ('aaemcnt SSCSPSS death
through a pie* of insanity, lie
will be handed by a silken rop«,
an ancient privilege accorded t<
British BOblsmsa found Riiilty B»
crime against tho frown.
Carson and Iti'iliiiond have
jointly appealed lor mercy for the
Irish rcbols who '"ought In the
ranks, ll is believed the major
lty of them will be -riven light
sentences and B few deported.
An Evening News Stopotcll re
ported that the Dublin hospitals
are filled, The bodies of liti sol
diers and )J2 rebels and civil
iiins have been counted there.
The morgues contain :(00 bodies,
riemiei* Asqutth announced
only three ex intions. The third
was Tliomar. J. Clarke, tobaccon
ist.
WHAT SHAW SAID
NKW YORK, May «.-■ QesTga
Bernard Shaw today csblsd tlie
following coiuniciit on the liish
rebellion:
"Silly, ignori nt, wromg-hsaded,
honorable, brave rspuhllcsns."
SOAKED
IN OIL;
TANKED
C. J. Williuins, known every
where on tlio waterfront as
"Hlaikle," has one of the most
unusual jobs of any man in Tu
i onia.
But It didn't save liim from
being locked up lust night ou a
charge of carrying too big a load
of grain alcohol, and it didn't
serve as sufficient excuse to get
him out of Jail today.
Listen to the idea that he put
up to I'oliie ('apt. Head this
morning:
"(',»{ .am, I waiita get out of
jail, i|iiick. I wasn't very drunk
lust Bight—not more limn usual,'
.•inyway. I've got one of the hard-1
est jobs you ever saw. I have to
drink one uart of alcohol a day
to hold it. I'm partially drunk
all the time.
"You see, when steamers come
into port, it's my job to dive down
into the tanks of coeoanut oil in
•he hold and release the valves
so the oil will run out. They
have to heat the oil sometimes, to
make it run.
"I couldn't handle the job
if 1 wasn't partially drunk.
Why. Captain, when I try to
take a bath. 1 float right on
top of the water In Hie bath
tub, because there's so much
oil in uij skin.
"There's a ship coming In to
night, and I have to do the div
ing act In the tank of oil. 1 was
on my way to get a quart of al
cohol last night, so s to be drunk
enough to handle the job, when
the officer pinched me. Won't
you let me out so 1 can go to
work?".
The police say that Williams'
story Is virtually true.
WILSON O. X.'M RKI'ORT
WASHINGTON — Gen. Scott's
report of the conference with
Gen. Obregon was handed to the
president today and stamped as
"satisfactory."
ADDING
New
ACCOUNTS
We are constantly
adding new accounts,
and our* business is
increasing at a very .
satisfactory rate. Pos
sibly you also might
» ( be glad to join us.
■ru
m n Puget Sound
f State Bank
H. N. TINKBR, Preß.
On the Rocky Road to--What?
Benson, Socialist Candidate,
Muckraker, Not An Organizer
BY WALTER LIPPMANN.
Nobody thinks of unking
what w&f) nf president Allan
lienson would make.
In the real sense of the
word he is not a candidate
for I lie presidency.
He Is a caniliilate for two
million voles.
I If lie polls that iniiiiy lie
will be regarded ns an nver
w 11. lii ling I \ successful nonii
ec.
In selecting Iti.it the so
cialists also decided Hie issue
on which he Is to fight.
lienson is the one consist
ent, out and out spokesman
of iiiiH-preparedness. There
Is no other.
Bryan hates preparedness,
bill ho will hedge ami evade,
will talk about a million men
springing to arms between
sunrise and sunset, lienson
won't hedge. 11' lie is against
something;, lie is bitterly and
definitely against It.
The socialists this year intend
to fight a campaign of obstruc
tion. They are on the defensive.
Csually it is the other way
around. Csually it is the social
ists who are for something with
the other parties opposing or
ignoring them. Hut in this cam
paign the tables are turned, and
the chief emphasis of the social
ists will be to prevent preparded
ness.
For that particular job Allan
TO HOLD OPEN FORUM
ON NONPARTISANSHIP
! A public discussion of the
. merits and demerits of the
principle Of li..ii-|.arl i-i.i.
ship In state antl county of
fices will be held iv Hie Co_B»
mercial cluli at H o'clock Fri
day evening under the aus
pices of Hie club's civic bur
eau.
Whether you're In favor of
niiii-p.-ii-'isiiiisbip or dead
against It, you're urged by
Hie bureau to attend the
meeting, which will be in the
nature of an open forum.
The non partisan Initiative
measure Which will come before
the voters next fall will be prer
sented from every angle by speak
ers on both sides of the'fence.
Speaking in support" of he
measuro will be Otto A. Case, of
Seattle, exceptive secretary of
the State .Non partisan league,
and George F. Cotterlll, former
Beattle mayor, who helped frame
the non-partisan initiative meas
ure to be voted on next fall.
A number of speakers will talk
against the measure.
He*. Ernest C. BloomQulst,
member ot toe aaanaglng <xrm
mlttee ot the «3sj_i>Biia-l dub
I uht- -'I
The Tacoma Times
(26c A MONTH.
$Jm\mmlm%lMmM m mMm3momt*kmmmMtoi^^
VOJj. XliT ISO. 117.
lienson is an admirable man. He
is by temperament an opponent.
lie is twice as sure of what he
does not want as he is of what he
does.
He's a Muckraker.
He was trained in the school of
the muck rakers. This means
that he will see the preparedness
agitation as a sinister conspiracy
of special interest playing on the
panic and gullibility of the Amer
ican people. He will point ills
finger at the munition makers,
the bankers, the exporters, the
army and navy groups, the edi
tors, the defense leagues and the
rest who are more or less in
volved financially In an increase
of armaments.
And to the question of whether
In the kind of world we live in,
armaments aren't needed even
though special interests profit by
them, he will reply that he is for
socialism which would create a
world In which the whole deadly
business could be eliminated.
Benson Scorns Details.
The steps by which such a
world is to be created do not ab
sorb much of his interest. He
works on the theory that If 'the
people could only be made to real
ize how they are exploited, de
ceived, and led by the nose, they
would have no particular troubles
In carrying socialism Into effect.
1 was once on a committee with
Benson which was trying to draft
civic bureau, will preside.
The public Is invited.
Members of the Non-partisan
league declared today that they
were by no means disappointed
by the refusal of the democratic
state convention to take a stand
for or against non-partisanship.
".We are just as glad that the
non-partisan principle is being
kept outside of party polities, was
the statement of C. K. Muckler,
chairman of the Pierce County
league. "It has been our purpose
from the first not to make It a
party Issue.
"If the democratic party cannot
see the handwriting ou the wall,
It is not up to the Non-partisan
league to act aa trustee for that
party. It is their affair entirely.
"The purpose of the Non-parti
san league Is to obtain the elec
tion of representatives. Ignoring
party lines, who will pass the
legislation demanded by the peo
ple of the state."
i
TODAY'S < I,KARI.\«.N
lTi_a»__tt_*__ ats 9i*7al
i i r*_sac(t«_a , *4«»,-is.<B|
THE ONLY INDEPENDENT NEWSPAPER IN TACOMA
TACOIUA, WASH., THIIjKiS 1)A V, MA V 4,19JG.
a bill for the socialization of the
railroads. The Intricate ques
tions of law, finance and adminis
tration bored and irritated him.
He would sit silent for long
stretches of time, nnd then burst
out with some story of graft and
swindle. He is a wonderful and
passionate hater of evil, a man
who has never grown callous or
complacent about poverty and
corruption. His hatred is so con
suming that little patience is left
for the drudgery of radicalism.
Not An Organizer.
Since he is not a candidate for
office this twist does not matter
much. Hut there is one aspect
of Ills job as socialist leader
where it will matter enormously.
His real business is to organise
the working class nnd the exploit
ed farmers for powerful economic
and political action. For that
there la needed a great organlsor
and a master of tactics. lienson
isn't In the least that sort of man.
Henson is a middle class tonga-1
zlne writer, neither a labor leader
not a politician. He is n good
speaker and a thrilling writer.
Hut he is not an organiser," nego
tiator, diplomat, he Is not the raaa
who can go Into the labor wo HO
unify its conflicts, destroy hfi
false leaders, and form it rtitb'o
political power.
Oreat I'ropiig'andist.- '1 J f
He will excite and n'mUae-Jm
radicals," he will have cmmbwp
able effect on much the satfieTinTt
of people who follow Bryaif oif I.a
Follette, but for the business of
making a political force out of
the working class, Benson'is not
only certain to fail, be is not even
likely to try.
His mind does not run to non
crete political action. It runs to
magazine articles. It runs to ex
posure, satire, scorn. 1 can Imag
ine Benson writing about a strike,
but not loading one.
H* Is a propagandist and m
agitator, one of tbe very b«*i t_
America, bat he lint even JL—W
iiy reatunblancs to tils ■jfvfMMS'l
which labor so 4l*snij*y>% jWfc.
DOESN'T
BOTHER
HAFFER
I By D'Loss Sutherland
I'Hiil llaffer,
the hoy social
ist whose tran
scendency to
fame reached a
Climax late yes
terday after
noon when a
jury found him
guilty of lilx-l
ing the sacred
memory of
George \\'a:-li
inglon • there
by setting a HJ
gal precedent
mulled from bis
bed Ibis morn-
I-Al I, HAI'I'IXR „g willi lh«
optimism 1.1 i.: irue socialist an I
dreamer, wlicu questioned as to
his fsellag about the verdict.
Hiil'ler fseea a year in he
o 11111\ iuil for writing an article
in which lie said the first presi
dent w;ts ■ drinking man, ,i bias
pllrmer and a slave-holder. Y"t,
ho did no! worry, lie slept late.
RsptMlS In Win finally.
Haffer was found high up in
oi.e of those tall lrainc rooming
house- on Tacoma nve. His
quarters were reached after a
long arduoua climb up winding
stairways. Thsy faced ■ dark
court.
His door was unlocked, for MS
had nothing to lose.
A heart v hail led the visitor in.
A pile of hooks and the inevit
able makings llaffer smokes
In.-oss-iiitl.. were the only decor
ations.
A well developed pair of arms
Slid i.road shoulders topped by a
mass of yellow, unruiy, bristling
hair and a smile marked the fa"*
suits of the long arduous trial.
I "! suppose Col. Joab Is more
of a a/reck I ban I am, but I think
(his case will go to a higher court
' ami I will eventually win," lie
said confidently,
Of lighting Strain.
"You see, the old strain of a
long line of fighting ancestors is
cropping out. 1 am finding ;ny
s> If
"I was sincere in niv siate-
Bient. that there was no malice in
my hssrl when I wrote that arti
cle,. I wished lo correct Ihe .'ai
lncj of hero worshipping, As
sassination and hero worship are
(win progeny of the philosophy of
Individualism. That is tlie type
of philosophy employed by Col.
Joab.
He raved and ranted for five
hours about me and his ideals. It
is such talks as his that incite
flight)' and lightly balanced men
to kill, stirli as John Wilkes
Ilooth and the others he likened
me to.
Of HiiPKcnot Ancestry.
"My aniertors on my mother's
side were the old French house
of l.amareaux, a persecuted, clem
thinking and fighting house.
They were Ileiigenots.
"They came to this country
during t lie inquisition Which
broke so many families In Franco.
They landed here even before
\yasliington began.
I "As far as patriotism Is con
cerned, there hns been plenty t f
It Iv my family. Two uncles of
mine fought bitterly through the
Clv.il war for the principle they
believed to be as true as the
one for which I am fighting."
• llaffer closed his eyes and with
a characteristic twitch of his
forehead reeined lo be retracing
those bloody steps of the years
that followed IS6O.
"Ambrose l.amareaux was In
the battle of Lavern," he contin
ued, "where the troops threaten
ed to kill their officers If thi*>y
surreiidereil lliein to the enemy.
Bo was hot headed. He cusse 1.
Is •_•_ Years Old.
Joseph l.aiiiereaux, another
ancle, was with the First Mlclii
akn Kngineers. He was a me
iSi.niif They loved the flag.
&p do I. And just because I
Aye an opinion that la different
■oni some. I am thought to ne
imloyal and I am to auffer."
J Haffer's father waa of German
descant, but died when Paul was
» small boy. He does not know
iii .Ii of him. Haffer was born in
Stand Rapid*, Mich., Nov. 21,
(9-4, and moved to Tacoma In
MtOO.
F He attended the Edison school
in South Tacoma for three years,
later the Oakland. He went ro
the Sumner high school.
He says he has always heen a
deep reader and has a passion
tor writing- He hopes to do much
tor socialism, the "educational
kind." as he described it, by his
■srliing later on.
le Is financial secretary ot
•soi ■UiHt ImmL No. 1, in Tacoma.
He fias a ntaweto- sitter living
nei.tj Morttrn and a hsJothar, A. L.
Hv/ler. u_* mother IlTof ftt Ort-
Ifet
25c A MONTH.
lc A COPY
Another Freak
Court Episode
1 to Live Down
■ ___|
/IT Every normal person in Taeonia today
will nope that Hpeedy action will be (taken
toward obtaining either a new trial <>r th»>
Haffer libel ease or an appeal to the rmpreme
court.' Ii is unthinkable that the l><>y defend
ant should serve a prison sentence [or w titing
criticism of George NVashingtou,
/TT The whole proceeding has been silly, The
*,| prosecuting attorney and the superior
court never should have tolerated the use of
our judicial machinery for so absurd an action.
/IT Col, .Jo'il' is ('ni. Joah and .'anno, help it,
W so cannot be blamed. Bui PriMMvutor
Remanu is not Col, Joab, and Judge Card is
not Col. Joab, ;uul they might to have used
/TT There are plenty of precedents for frivol-
oiis litigation being thrown out of court.
No doubt .lntl!.'.-!' Card himself has declined to
hear charges less foolish than this. \"u doubt
Prosecutor Kemann has declined to press
t liarges no less vital.
/TT The jury seems to have been carried away
*j| I>\ the warm-weather ailment that was
temporarily affecting the rest of the court and
its rinding furnishes one more fine argument
for those persona who would abolish juries
altogether.
/IT This state seems to have been peculiarly
*ll afflicted within the last few years by nut
ty courts. Just when we had begun to live
down the sinister memory of Judge Hanford
and the mountebank foolishness of Judge
Humphries, our whole state again is made
ridiculous in the eyes of the nation by the Haf
fer proceeding.
/TT Every press association has been cany
*tl ing reams of news regarding NVashing
tou'h latest court vagary to the ends of the
earth, and the papers everywhere have been
printing columns of it. TIIK CASE ll \s
DONE .MOIi'K TO WAKE TACOMA A SYN
ONYM KOI, I'IfKAKISIINKSS .Nil OUR
COURTS A LAUGHING STOCK AT IIOMi:
AND ABROAD THAN OUR WHOLE
BENCH CAN OFFSET BY JUST AND
WISE RULINGS IX THE WHOLE TERM
OF OFFICE OF ITS INCUMBENTS.
"SMASH 'EM," ORDERS
GILL IN BOOZE RAIDS
SICATTI.R, May t "SlIUBal
everything, including the fix
tures, in all so-called drug stores
which are really saloons," are
the orders of Mayor Gill to the
police today.
'1 ani willing to take my chance
with any jury if those fellows go
Into court und claim damages,"
continued the major.
"No sensible man believes that
a driiK store that carries $2.00u
worth of liquor stock Is conduct
ing ■ legitimate business. My
directions to the police are to
make it plain to the bootleggers
that this is not a kid glove cam
paign.
Chief lift kinuliain acted with
my approval when lie cleaned up
the Stewart street pharmacy
HE WAS ASLEEP
Why was young Kdenbor
ough, secretary of the First
Lord of the Admiralty, asleep
on the day of his wedding?
Why did every one think
he had committed suicide liy
taking poison?
Furthermore, why did his
flnanree, a true British pa
triot, sell some plans of for
tifications to a spy?
The mystery Is all cleared.
up by "THE CRIMF. DOC
TOR," the novel-a-weel; in
The Times beginning next
Monday. You get this $1..'.0
popular novel by E. W. iior
nuntr In The Times for six
cents.
RKORKTH INHOSIMTALITY
WASHINGTON — Btr Cecil
Spring-Rice personally expressed
a regret today to President Wil
son that a suitable reception bad
not been paid Secretary McAdoo
at Trinidad.
Wx.A_H._R X
Tacoma: Fair tonight and 1
Washington: Same. 1
Tuesday night.
"The bootleggers' plan is to
take their chances with fines in
COUrt, thinking to make big prof
Its between arresis.
There is only one way to beat
this, and that is to emphasize our
views that these men are violators
by smashing up their sham drug
stores."
| Talk o' the Times °\
(ireelings, have yoii heard
what the (». 4>. I*, convention
of Tennessee did yesterday?
Xo? Well,then, you cer
tainly missed something im
portant!
It Instructed its delegates to
vote for our own Congressman
Humphrey as the 0. O. P. nom
inee for vice president!
Personally, this strikes us
an being; about the i»--t sug
gestlmi we've heard yet. By
all means, let's lake 'em up
on it before tliey change
their minds.
Now let's prosecute all the
preachers who have libelled the
memory of Judas.
And all Uie editor* who've
Übelled Benedict Arnold and
Mt.ihlii.clll.
And all tbe lawyers who've
made mean remarks about Nero
and Bluebeard.
In redtfjeoratinc your Hv
inc room, am** too lady next
BLAZE
STILL
RAGES
lil-:i(l.l\. May I HmblmJ
ri'ioliiiiiinlsia, Maiteil it
«■'«*'»• fire «l Mi.-riiu, itliitli
spread Imtitv lo tin- Hiliiiiiils
trillion liiillilim;-. il sHs* ajft
•'l in i Miirlvlioim tlj-a-iiitrh.
TIM lir<- is villi uiliilli;.
ilomlis |.|:uitiil ill M'\rml of tllfl
liirm-st litilldiUffi ol tin' «it\ ex
ploded iilmosi HimiillHiit'oiiHly,
• ■:iosin k ninny death* .'tnii smrt
ing mi.mil roil.i l.li■ firi'n in all
parti of the cltjr,
Traoita ivere ordcrstj oal mul
an eitenstra searrli w.-ih Li'imn
for H.o revoliitlonlata. Sneial
persona who hava in.ii üßdar mia
plrlou i>> ihe l.'nssian Mcrel iio
llce ion. ai once thrown Into Jail,
rapidly, cutting r wide swathe
iiuoi!i;ii the great buelne** district
ai last reports tha ni«■ whs
threatening the Kremlin, i din
in.i mi Hie north iiank i.r the
river, In which are Included pra*>
tlrallj nil the civil and eccleahM.
Ileal liuildlnga,
I>\ 11:111111. * waa n-fil in a
lliinlir l-l foil lo ajajvytj On.
ilisli'lrl. wliirh I - prised in,>i«"
lor its rHlniiitta ri'lai inns
ili.iii I. r Hi.' inli'iiisii' valaM
oi ilh- slrini in is.
One ol ilia inoai prominent
hii lld lag* in the Kremlin, known
as i iio Ureal Palaoe, ims timet in
me since Ig.'ll
\ reisja of terror bwbbl over
MoM-oa a>. troona were throws
a'.oiii the riiy in ,ir«'\-'lit any
criminal* From eacoplag, The
royal soldiers al once began a
Mm. h of all liouaeholds amons
the lowar claaaea, ruthlestly ar
reatlng iteraoni agalnal whrai
tlie slightest suspicion rould]
arse,
.\n admission of guilt r.iiioiig
the loeendlarlata could tit loi.vd.
Till' fill' loss alicii'lv lias
aiiKiuiili'il lo i.vii SI»MbVNM,
il is rp. in ii'il.
II is sai.l tlml liimilnils
Wore killed In tlie pielliuia
il.il \ I'vplnsiiiiis, Inn ii.. vi . i
lirution oi aaUnotoa of <he
ileiiil Main lieen ri'eeiieil.
GOODWIN'S
KEYNOTER
FOR MOOSE
BKATTL.B, May 4. .Inlgc F.
11. Goodwin ol Spokane wa- cbO*>
en temporary . liairman of .he
progressive convention which met
nsre this morning.
In his kit.unit- speech he Bt*
tsi sad Presides) Wilson ami tho
democratic admlntatrstioa .mil
lauded Ihe Itoosevell type of prc
pai.■lines-.
The Pierce county delegation
arrived on a special laterurbai
car early this morning. Hums
Paw, who ne.i.lcd the delegation,
was slateil for secretary of tha
convention.
This afternoon the platform,
com mitts* will make its report
and seven state delegates will be
elected to the national convention
la Chicago. They will be in*
striicte.l for Hoosevelt.
The delegstei who ere expci tori
to go from this district are Wal
ter I. Thompson and Stanton,
Warbtii ton.
I'lKCi: NOT NKAR
WASHINGTON, D. C. Thomas*
Nelson Cage. American amlassS*
dor lo Italy, told Wilson today,
lie saw in. immediate prospect* fog
peace ill Kurope.
ikinr, use . I leering i-olnra, ,
Hut not 1..11.1 ,
The girls these days
Are wearing kilts:
And some show bows
And some show stilts.
/ "lU'eOAT. -take a ei<_^
I tHANce WK6M THEY Hut,)
\ove« an E-- y^^S,
/HTfb o cyiNs If 4 J
Bert Kewaealy'* Mem ot • I
sorr hn*x» j/