The Savannah morning news., October 28, 1904, Page 4, Image 4

About The Savannah morning news. (Savannah, Ga.) 1900-current

Image provided by: Digital Library of Georgia, a project of GALILEO located at the University of Georgia Libraries

                
4
§£bt IHofnina Mete#.
MornlßK Mews BaUdlng, Stnuuli, G>
FRIDAY. OCTOBER 28. 1904.
Registered at Postoffice In Savannah.
THE MORNING NEWS Is published
every day in the year, and served to
subscribers in the city, or sent by mail,
one week, 18 cents; one month, 70
cents; three months, 82.00; six months,
$4.00; one year, SB.OO.
THE MOUSING NEWS by mail,
six time a week (without Sunday
issue), one month, 50 cents; three
months, $1.50; six months, $3.00; one
year. $6.00.
THE WEEKLY NEWS, two issues a
week (Monday and Thursday), by
mail, one year, SI.OO.
Subscriptions payable In advance.
Remit by money order, check or reg
istered letter. Currency sent by mall
at risk of sender.
Transient advertisements, other than
local or reading notices, amusements
and classified column. 10 cents a line.
Fourteen lines of agate type—equal
to one inch in depth—is the standard
of measurement. Classified column ad
vertisements, 1 cent a word each inser
tion. Every word and figure counted —
No advertisement accepted for less
than 15 cents week days, 25 cents
Sundays. Contract rates and discounts
made known on application at busi
ness office.
Orders for delivery of the Morning
News to either residence or place of
business can be made by mail or by
telephone No. 210. Any irregularity in
delivery should be Immediately re
ported.
Letters and telegrams should be ad
dressed “MORNING NEWS,” Savan
nah. Ga.
EASTERN OFFICE, 23 Park Row.
New York City, H. C. Faulkner, Man
ager.
MLI Vi m AIAtKIIStMMIS
Meetings—Palestine Commandery No.
7, K. T.
Special Notices —Investment Broker,
James Hunter; Life Insurance Agents
Wanted, F. L. Purse; Crew Notice,
Strachan & Cos.. Consignees.
Business Notices—Bicycle Repairing,
G. W. Thomas; Ready for Carnival
Crowds, Sommers' Cafe.
The Great Blanket Sale —Leopold Ad
ler.
Friday Special Sale —Gustave Eck
stein & Cos.
Ladies' and Children’s Muslin Under
wear-Estate Daniel Hogan.
Gillette’s Safety Razor—Livingston's
Pharmacy.
The Carib Cigar—J. S. Pinkussohn
Cigar Company.
Brightine—Knight's Pharmacy.
Bulbs —J. T. Shuptrine.
Foods—Postum Food Coffee.
Shirts Sent to Us To-day—E. & W.
Laundry.
No Better Ranges Made—Latti
jnore's.
Tooth Brushes—Rowlinski, Pharma
cist.
Gannymede ’76 Rye—Henry Solomon
& Son.
Mr. Smoker —Pete Dailey.
Buckwheat —The Delmonico Cos.
There Are Two Points —Connor &
Sullivan.
Hides, Wax, Etc. —A. Ehrlich & Bro.
Words Cannot Convey Falks’,
Around the Corner.
Official Carnival Programme—Carni
val Association.
Cold We'ather Specialties—New York
Cash Grocery.
Savannah Theater —"Her Lord and
Master;” Saturday, Matinee and
Night, "Babes In Toyland.”
Potatoes—W. D. Simkins & Cos.
Seed Oats and Rye—Harden &
Rourk.
Cheap Column Advertisements—Help
Wanted; Employment Wanted; For
Rent; For Sale; Lost; Personal; Mis
cellaneous.
The Weather.
The Indications for Georgia for to
day are for fair weather, with light
east to southeast winds. Eastern
Florida fair weather with light east to
southeast winds.
Indiana, we suspect, is using unfair
means to attract immigration thither.
The newspapers of the Hoosier state
announce that whisky has fallen oft
four cents and the cost of a marriage
license has been Just cut in half.
A New York attorney argues that
a woman of seventy-three who wears
high heeled shoes is not necessarily
insane. To prove it another woman
of similar age who happened to be
in the court room showed her heels
and then defied any one to call her In
sane. The attorney for the heels won
his suit.
The enforced quietness of the stren
uous President has at last been too
much for him and now he has started
in to reform Washington society. He
calmly announces that the nine cabi
net dinners—social functions of the
year—are "tiresome and bores." We
submit that that is a most distin
guished compliment to the cabinet offi
cers and their wives.
New York society has decreed that
as many rings shall be worn on the
right hand as on the left. In order that
there may be perfect symmetry. Per
haps this Is a move to discourage
matrimony among the poorer men.
Many a man who has managed to get
over the barrier of one costly en
gagement ring would give up the
ghost at the thought of two.
We always suspected that that re
mark of Andrew Carnegie, that men
were incompetent to work after they
passed the thirty-live year mark would
get the poor man In trouble. Now
Jones, a union labor leader,
has advised all the wives of the min
ing regions to kill off hubby after he
reaches the thirty-five year limit. If
this suggestion is generally adopted
no man will dare get married before
he has passed that danger line and
even then he will have to put his
laoapwutiv* bride under a peace bund.
THE DOGGER DANK AFFAIR.
Vice Admiral Rojestvensky’s ex
planation of the firing of the Russian
war ships on a British fishing fleet in
the North seta is about as hazy as he
says the weather was at the time of the
occurrence. It is not at all satisfactory
to the British government, and leaves
much yet to be conjectured. The vice
admiral says two torpedo boats came
towards his fleet from the direction of
the fishing vessels, and that he opened
fire on them. He thinks one of them
was sunk. Prince Keretelli, an officer
of one of the battleships, says there
were eight torpedo boats, which sud
denly surroundered the transport
Anatol. He says the torpedo boats
were told to go away, but as they con
tinued to advance threateningly the
Russian ships opened fire on them.
The Russians, it is said, had been
Informed on good authority that the
Japanese government had bought
torpedo boats in England, and that an
attack would be made on the Russian
fleet in the North sea. Having in mind
this information, and anticipating an
attack according to programme, the
Russians proceeded to take steps for
their defense. Meanwhile there is no
evidence on any reliable authority that
there was a Japanese torpedo boat
anywhere within 1,000 miles or more of
Dogger Bank. The fishermen who were
fired on told a plain and reasonable
story. They declare they were under
the rays of the Russian searchlights
for twenty minutes; that the lights
were so strong as to be blinding, and
that the ships that fired on them were
in hailing distance. How under the
circumstances, a fleet of trawlers could
have been mistaken for either two or
eight torpedo boats passes all under
standing. There must be still more in
the story, that has not yet been made
public.
Meanwhile, the tension between the
two governments has become strained.
Russia, it seems, is not willing to ad
mit that Great Britain has a right to
demand the punishment of the officer
or officers responsible for the fearful
blunder. She thinks that it is her own
right to say whether or not the blunder
er should be punished,and th“at when she
has apologized and paid a sum of
money. Great Britain has nothing
further to expect in reason. That, how
ever, is not likely to suit the British
idea. What assurance will she have
that the same sort of thing will not oc
cur again, Great Brittain wishes to
know. If the responsible officers are
not punished?
As yet, however, there is no serious
prospect of a breach of relations even
through Admiral Sir Charles Beres
ford’s squadron has been ordered held
in readiness. The affair is in the hand3
of the diplomats and they will doubt
less be able to arrange it satisfactorily.
KJfOX “ANSWERS" PARKER. /
The Hon. Philander Chase Knox Is
'the successor to Matthew Stanley
Quay as United States senator from
Pennsylvania. Until recently Mr,
Knox was Attorney General In the
cabinet of President Roosevelt. As the
head of the federal Department of
Justice, it was Mr. Knox’s duty to
enforce the federal laws against Ille
gal trusts and combinations in re
straint of trade. What he didn’t do in
that direction has become notorious.
Whait he did was to conduct a prose
cution against a certain railroad com
bination in the Northwest, and after
gaining his case and demonstrating
that the trusts could be reached by
the law, his first care was to announce
that the government did not propose
to “run amuck” through the corpora
tions; in other words, that the trusts
needn't be worried about the admin
istration’s attitude towards them; that
the administration had made a bluff in
the prosecution of one trust, and that
would suffice for material with which
to hoodwink the people.
Ait the time Mr. Knox was selected
to succeed the late Mr. Quay, it was
openly charged and very generally ac
cepted, that certain of the great trusts
had made the selection. They had
picked out Mr. Knox from the field of
candidates to be their spokesman and
representative In the Senate from
Pennsyl. aula. Mr. Knox had been a
trust lawyer before he went Into the
oablnet; he was believed to be in sym
pathy with the great combines of capi
tal, hence It Is only natural that ppblic
opinion should continue to connect him
with the pro-trust crowd.
The other day Judge Parker made
an anti-trust speech ait Esopus; and
now Senator Knox has come forward
with an “answer" to it. Judge Par
ker charged that the trusts, sustained
and fostered by the protective tariff,
prey on the many for the benefit of
the few. Senator Knox “answers” that
Mr. Belmont Is supporting Judge Par
ker, and that Mr. Belmont is a very
rich man who Is connected with sev
eral corporations.
Judge Parker charged that the Ding
ley tariff put money into the pockets
of certain favored Interests, after hav
ing robbed the people of it, and that
In turn the protected interests put
money Into the Republican campaign
fund, in a lively anticipation of favors
to come. Senator Knox “answers," in
effect, that the Belmont Interests are
connected with certain monopolies; and
Belmont Is supporting Parker.
Judge Parker asserted thait much
corruption in politics was directly
traceable to the Republican party's use
of campaign funds contributed by pro
tected trusts and the party was sub
versive of good citizenship and public
honor. Senator Knox’s "answer” is
that Judge Parker once assisted In
the election of David B. Hill to the
governorship, and that Tammy Hall Is
now working for the Judge's election.
In short, Senator Knox’s so-called
answer Is not even a fairly decent “tu
quoque” argument. He falls In every
detail to show that Judge Parker has
not stated the facts precisely as they
are, and falls back upon the lame ex
pedient of trying to convince voters
that the Democratic candidate is in
questionable company!
Savannah Is putting on her gala at
tire In honor of the carnival. Let
everyone now join hands to make the
occasion an unqualified success. It
Is a great opportunity to show off our
advantages to the crowds of visitors
who .will Hook to ths otty,
SAVANNAH MORNING NEWS: IK IDA Y. OCTOBER 28. 1904.
PARKER TAKES THE STI HP.
Yielding to the Judgment of his
friends, Judge Parker has decided that
he will make campaign speeches in
New York, New Jersey and Connecti
cut during the next few days. It was
at first the candidate's purpose to
make no speeches except those de
livered at his home In Esopus to vis
iting delegations, depending on the
news agencies to carry those speeches
to the country at large. In all prob
ability that programme would have
sufficed; but during the past few
weeks there has been a clamor for the
candidate to show himself in some of
the doubtful states and talk to the
people direct, and in response to this
demand Judge Parker has arranged
for a limited number of speeches in
the states named. His appearance, it
is believed, will considerably strength
en the probability of all three of the
states named going Democratic next
month. Conservative politicians al
ready feel quite sure that Parker will
carry New York; if a few speeches
by him will “cinch” the matter, then
certainly it is better that the speeches
be made.
It is risking nothing to say that the
innovation will strengthen Judge Par
ker's chances of election. That his is
a charming personality is attested by
everyone who has visited him at Rose
mount. He has a fine face, a com
manding form and a convincing man
ner of presenting his arguments. He
is not an orator, like Mr. Bryan,
Bourke Cockran or Senator Beveridge;
but he has a way of setting forth
his facts and logic with such direct
ness and lucidity as to compel convic
tion. And his bearing, on the rostrum
and off, is of the sort to draw friends
and admirers!, A recent visitor to
Esopus, who confessed himself some
what lukewarm with regard to poli
tics, declared, after meeting Judge
Parker, that he found him one of the
"most winning" gentlemen that he
had ever seen; and ever since he has
been an enthusiastic Parker advocate.
The appearance of Judge Parker on
the stump will be apt to create a sim
ilar impression on the minds of a great
number of those who will hear him.
MEDICAL RLACKS
The statement was made recently
by the counsel for the County Medical
Society of New York that there are
not less than 20,000 quack doctors
practicing medicine in New York city.
In general terms, a quack doctor is
understood to mean one who, being
unqualified by education and lackirg
a diploma from a reputable medical
school, assumes to prescribe remedies
for diseases. The quack Is regarded
as an Impostor and a humbug, who
thrives upon the ignorance and credul
ity of the people treated by him.
That there are quack doctors in New
York, and every other city, will hard
ly be questioned; and they will con
tinue to exist as long as there are
people willing and eager to be hum
bugged; nor does It seem that the
host of the gullible Is diminishing In
numbers.
But is it likely that are 20,000
quacks in New York? If that number
exists, then it would appear that New
York’s law-s governing the practice of
medicine are weak and faulty, or else
they are not being enforced. If the
latter is the case, the counsel of the,
County Medical Society would seem
to be the person to move to the end
of the enforcement of the laws.
But by whom are these “quacks”
classified as such? If we understand
it, the County Medical Society is com
posed of allopaths, who claim to be
of the “regular” school of medicine.
It hasn't been a very long time since
the “regulars” regarded physicians of
all other schools than their own as
quacks. They had neither time nor
patience for homeopaths, eclectics or
“specifics.” There was no criticism
too harsh to be passed upon the “spe
cific” who advertised his skill by
■means of the newspapers or otherwise.
The peculiar code of ethics of the pro
fession put beyond the pale of recog
nition any doctor who solicited busi
ness. It was the correct thing, and
the only correct thing, for a doctor to
sit in his office and wait for business
to come to him. And then, only re
cently, the osteopaths came in for a
severe handling, in legislatures and
elsewhere, and the “scientists" and
other faith healers are still being
pointed to as charlatans and frauds;
as doubtless some of them are. But
In several states the courts have held
that osteopathy is a science of heal
ing, and that faith healing is not Il
legal. When, therefore, the statement
is made that there are 20,000 quack
doctors In New York city, the reason
able assumption Is that Included In
the number are practitioners of cer
tain schools of medicine that do not
meet with the approval of the person
making the estimate.
A New York man publicly rejoices
because he is the father of twenty
boys. This makes one complete foot
ball team and one complete baseball
aggregation in his family. To this fea
ture he doesn’t object, but he claims
the right to raise a howl when the
spellbinders of both parties begin be
sieging his home for the family vote.
If the sons should split even on pol
itics It will probably be necessary to
call in the police to preserve order,
as the vision of an Irate father In the
woodshed with twenty sons In line
before him Is Just a little too much
for the ordinary comprehension.
A Philadelphia man is preparing to
erect a costly monument over the
grave of his pet dog. and no doubt he
will come In for a good share of guy
ing Hnd will be pointed out as weak
In the head. And yet, if honesty,
faithfulness, comradeship, and genuine
love and friendship count for any
thing, the dog is more deserving of a
costly monument than many of his
masters.
A lexicographer has oalled attention
to the fact that th'e word tariff Is de
rived from Tarlfla, a town In Spain,
whence flotillas of privateer* were wont
to sally forth and levy tribute on the
merchant vessels they encountered.
The Republican sponsors of the trust
privateers have chosen well a word to
represent Just wliat they stand for.
The personal record of President
Roosevelt might be summed up in
brief as follows: Now favoring labor
In Pennsylvania and later keeping
clear of a similar problem in Colorado;
once clamoring for war with Spain
and now calling for a peace confer
ence; in his books advocating lynch
ing for horse stealing and as President
condemning it (for criminal assault;
dismissing Gen. Miles without praise
on the ground that public officials
should retire without commendation
and a few months later eulogizing cer
tain retiring officers of his cabinet;
believing in negro appointments in
the South and disbelieving in them
for the North; publicly denying that
he knew of any impending revolution
in Panama and privately writing just
the reverse to Dr. Albert Shaw; once
prosecuting the trusts and then an
nouncing through his closest friend
that he would not “run amuck;" once
claiming that government officials
should take no part in political cam
paigns and now forcing them to do so
or give up their positions. Some brut
ally frank persons might term such a
record one characteristic of the ward
Politician. The master-mind of
Shakespeare more pleasantly says,
"All the world’s a stage and all the
men and women players on it—and
one man in his time plays many
parts.”
Attention has been called to the fact
that in the closing days of the Cleve
land administration the wholesale cost
of the breadstuft's consumed by an
average American in a year was $11.73.
On Sept. 1, 1904, it was slß.47—an in
crease of $6.74. And now the New York
World wishes to know if the slices of
bread in .he “full dinner pail” are
being cut thinner to correspond. Not
at all. The Republican tin trust has
merely decreased the size of the dinner
pail in the same ratio, 57 per cent.
They insult the intelligence of the la
boring man by acting as though he
were Just as well contented with a
small dinner pail well filled as with a
large one in the same condition.
Ex-Gov. Black of New York has an
nounced that he will go to Kentucky
immediately after the election to de
fend Caleb Powers, now under death
sentence for the murder of Gov. Goe
bel. With the Republican Governor of
Indiana refusing to give Taylor back
to Kentucky for trial, and with a
Republican ex-Governor of New York
hurrying to Kentucky to defend an
other of the alleged murderers, does
there .not seem to be just a bit of in
consistency in the Republican cry that
it is only the Democrats of Kentucky
who are trying to make a political
battle oqt of the trial of the Goebel
assassins?
Chicago is preparing to have a con
test between bank clerks to determine
who can count $1,000,000 and get it in
the proper form for shipping away in
the least tlfne. We would advise the
prospective Contestants to slip over to
Canada for ft few days and take sev
eral lessons from notable .refugees
there. They will find in CanaflVbertaln
gentlemen wlik) performed some rather
startling feats in rapid handling of
money during their residence on the
American side of the frontier.
Republicans are wildly claiming
that the Democrats have sent a man
to Panama to secure evidence that
President Roosevelt fomented the re
bellion there. If he did not do so, why
so much fear! Evidently there is a
guilty conscience that is beginning to
trouble the Republicans. We are glad
of this, for we were Just beginning to
think that the party had forgotten
that there was such a thing as any
kind of a conscience.
A leap year marriage in New York
has ended in a divorce. When the pre
siding judge asked the man, who was
the libellant, why he married the
woman, he calmly answered, "She pro
posed and I had to accept.” We would
like to see that woman in order to de
termine whether It was Just her win
ning ways that forced the acceptance
or whether she carried an ax with her
when she went forth to “pop the
question.”
CURRENT COMMENT.
The Galveston Daily News (Dem.)
says; "To dismiss with fine scorn the
government officials who failed to find
in the Slocum case a verdict to satis
fy the popular demand was a decided
ly politic thing for President Roose
velt to do. He never falls to do the
politic thing with a fine show of
bravery. Still he has produced no ev
idence or argument to prove that the
finding was not based upon a full,
fair and fearless investigation.”
The Norfolk Landmark (Dem.) says:
"Mr. Cleveland has hit the nail on the
head In his assertion that never before
has the machinery of present party
control been used-so unblushlngly and
so Insolently for its own perpetuation.
The American people are not slow
witted. While Mr. Roosevelt's man
agers profess absolute certainty that
their candidate will sweep the coun
try next month, they may get a blow
from the silent vote that will fairly
paralyze them. The Increase in reg
istration In the doubtful states indi
cates that the silent vote is going to
be on hand."
The Philadelphia Record (Dem.)
says: "Because of our superior natural
resources and more efficient machinery
and lubor iron and steel can be made
in the United States at less cost per
ton than In any other country. We
have distanced all other countries in
amount of production. Yet we tax
ourselves—though we have no com
petitors to fear—in order to pay a
heavy tariff bounty to Iron and steel
makers who combine together to ex
tort from home consumers Inordinate
prices while selling for less prices In
other markets. Puck was not far
wrong when he cried: ’What fools
these mortals be!' ”
The Montgomery Advertiser (Dem.)
says: "The prosperity cry of the Re
publicans Is partly hypocrisy and
largely an Insult to the intelligence
of the American people. Certain pro
tested interests are prosperous be
cause of the advantages which pro
tection gives them. Asa general
thing, the farmers are fairly prosper
ous and would be much more so, but
that they have to buy so many trust
coddled articles, and but for the
further fact that these same trusts
secure a large share of what ought to
be legitimate profit for the producers.
Even if the farmers are more than
usually prosperous, they owe none of
It to the Republicans or to their ad*
ministration,”
The Professor's Little Joke.
The football game was In progress.
The Retired College Professor let out
his long pet-up enthusiasm whenever
the sophs made a brilliant play, says
the New York Press.
“It is all nonsense to become so ex
cited over a game so crowded with in
anity,” said the Cynic. He was sitting
beside the Professor.
“Urn!” grunted the latter, viewing
the Cynic critically over the gold rims
of his old-fashioned spectacles.
"I’mean it, sir,” continued the Cynic,
with an emphatic nod of his narrow
head. “For instance, do you think it
promotes health for the young men to
wear those ugly nose-guards?”
A few minutes of silence ensued,
which was suddenly broken by the
Professor, who replied, drawlingly:
“It may not be healthful, but I’m
pretty sure those ‘ugly nose-guards,’
as you call them, certainly force the
youngsters to practice economy.”
“Economy,” almost shrieked the
Cynic. “11l what way?”
And everybody laughed when the
usually stolid Professor said:
“Why, it helps them to save their
scents.”
For the Cuckoo.
The aggressive man finished his
story and regarded us with such a su
perior air that we trotted out the lit
tle anecdote about the cuckoo clock.
“Yes, sir,” we concluded, says Short
Stories, "just as he shouted upstairs
that it was 12 o’clock, the cuckoo clock
cuckooed three times, and the man
didn’t have to do a thing but stand
there on the stairs and cuckoo nine
more to make twelve.”
We laughed uproariously and con
gratulated ourselves that the traveler
was effectually squelched.
“Well, go on,” said he, with some
impatience.
“On where?” we asked.
"On with the story,” he replied.
“Why, man,” we expostulated, “that
is the story. Don’t you see? Just as
shouted upstairs—”
“Oh. rats!” said the man. “next
morning, when the man was going to
work, his wife said: ‘Tom, don’t for
get to bring home a seidlitz powder.’
‘What for?’ asked Thomas. ‘Why, for
our cuckoo,’ said his wife. ‘I noticed
that he had the hiccoughs last night
when he struck twelve. ”
Hake Haste Slowly.
CWauncey Depew credits one of his
latest stories to an employe of the Van
derbilt lines, says the Boston Post, who
once attended an old fashioned camp
meeting. The brethren and sisters were
giving their experiences, each in the
language of his own craft. First a
sailor got up and told how he was
going to heaven at the rate of 20 knots
an hour, before a fair wind. He was
followed by a railroad man, who told
how easily he was on the way to heav
en on a perfectly ballasted track, be
hind the newest type of engine, and
w*as making sixty miles an hour, in
cluding stops. Finally a decrepit old
woman got up.
"Brothers and sisters,” she said, “I
have been walking there for the last
twenty years and my rheumatism is
so bad that I can't walk very fast.
But, brothers and sisters, let some of
these fast goers look out or Pll get
there first. They irfay bust their b’ilers
if they crowd on too much steam.”
Break It Gently.
Richard Le Gallienne spends much of
his time in New York, says the Phil
adelphia Ledger. He affects a decid
edly poetical fashion in hair, which
calls for a sparing use of the shears.
Near his lodgings is a German barber
shop, where he frequently drops in to
have his shoes polished, but never for
tonsorial attention, much to the dis
gust of the proprietor, who is possessed
of the true barber hair-destroying in
stinct. The other day as the poet left,
after one of his usual visits, a cus
teiner beard the barber say to the
boy:
"See here, Fritz, der next dime dot
shentlemans comes in to get his shine
I vants you to Say somedings to him
aboudt dot shameless hair he got.
Doan get fresh, and make some of
fenses—shust hint delicate. Say, ’Boss,
you looks like a shackasses wld dot
hair: vhy doan you git him cut al
ready?’ ”
Jest ’Fore ’Lectiou.
From the Brooklyn Daily Eagle.
WITH APOLOGIES TO EUGENE
FIELD.
(“If there could be a presidential
campaign on all the time, Theodore
Roosevelt would be as peaceable a
President as ever drew breath.”—Mil
waukee News.)
I.
Jokers call me Teddy, Cowboys call
me Ted.
Uncle Sam he calls me Theodore in
stead;
Most all the time, the whole year
'round, there ain’t no flies on me;
But, jest ’fore ’lection I’m as good as
I kin be.
"Constitution,” yer kin bet’s a highly
worried cat;
Sick ray tender Root at her, she don't
know where she’s at;
Got a Tariff sled, an’ when us kids
goes out to slide,
Long comes "Prosperity," an’ we all
hook a ride—
Uncle Sam he holds the reins; some
times, when he's cross,
He reaches at us with his whip, an*
larrups up his hoss;
An' then Ila ft an' holler: "Oh, ye
never once tetched me!”
But jest ’fore ’lection I’m as good as I
kin be.
11.
Columbia says she hopes that when I
get to t)e a man
I’ll take a genuine Interest in that
quiet Hague Peace Plan;
But Columbia she has never been to
see a Wild West show,
Nor read the life of Daniel Boone, or
else I guess she'd know
That Buff'lo Bill an' Cowboys is good
enough for me,
Except Jest ’fore ’lection, when I'm
good as I kin be.
' 111.
An’ then poor Root he hangs around,
as if he wasn't fed;
His eyes they seem a-saylng, "What’s
the matter with yer, Ted?”
And "Constitution” leaves her perch,
an’ wonders what's become
Of them two enemies of hern that used
to make things hum;
But I am so perlite, an’ tend so earn
estly to biz
Columbia says to Uncle Sam: “How
Improved our Teddy Is.”
But Uncle, havin' been a boy htsaelf,
suspicions me.
When Jest 'fore 'lection I’m as good as
I kin be.
IV.
For 'Lection with Its prizes of offices
an' toys.
Rewards, they say, the proper kids, an’
not the naughty boys;
So wash yer face, an’ bresh yer hair,
an’ mind yer ps an' qs,
An’ don't bust out yer pantaloons, an’
don't wear out yer shoes;
Say "Yearum" to the ladles an’ "Yes
sur” to the men,
An’ when they’s company, don’t pass
yer plate for pie again;
But thinkln' of the fun yer'll have,
when four years more yer see
Jest 'fore MeoUeu, be as good us yer
kin bat
~-J. A,
SPIDER VENOMOIS AS BATTLER.
From the Philadelphia Record.
Washington, D. C., Oct. 23. —That the
one poisonous insect of North America
is a little black spider, plenty of whose
species are found in this city and
whose bite is nearly as bad as that
of a rattlesnake, is the assertion of C.
F. Schwartz, one of the entomologists
of the Smithsonian Institution.
“The noxious insect in question,”
continues Mr. Schwartz, "is no differ
ent in appearance from any other spid
er that there is no mistaking it. It
has a globular shining body devoid
of hair, black in color, and usually
with a red spot.
"The investigations into all reported
fatal or harmful results from the
bites of spiders which the Agricultural
Department has been conducting for
the last fourteen years has led to the
determination of one Instance in which
the bite of this black spider, whoso
scientific designation is latrodectus
mactans, has resulted in the death of
the victim. This case was that of a
child about two years of age, who was
bitten upon the lip, and there is no
doubt that the death of the child a
few hours afterward was the result of
the bite.
‘‘This spider is chiefly a menace to
persons handling old wood, as it is
usually found under logs and in wood
sheds. I would undertake to go out
now and find a dozen specimens in an
hour.
"Frequent reports have been re
ceived at the Agricultural Department
of full-grown persons having been
killed by the bite, but it has been
impossible to fully verify these.
“A farmer in North Carolina sent
an account not long ago of one of
his laborers being killed by the bite
of this snider. He described the
symptoms exhibited by the victim,
which were similar to instances re
corded in Southern Europe, where this
spider is known by the name of ‘mal
mignlatte.’ ”
MISS ROOSEVELT A DANCER.
From the Indianapolis News,
New York, Oct. 21.—Society hopes
Miss Roosevelt one of these days will
appear in amateur theatricals, so she
may be Induced to give rein to her
really remarkable talents as a singer
and fancy dancer.
Miss Roosevelt’s girl friends whisper
interesting accounts of her ability in
that line. Everybody in her acquaint
ance knows she is fairly athletic, of
course, but it is not within the ken
of many outside her intimates that
she also is a gymnast of no mean skill.
Her close friends speak of her feats
as "stunts”—a generic term which to
the debutante mind covers a multitude
of acrobatics. The fact is, Miss Roose
velt has such a supple frame as a
result of the active life her parents al
ways have encouraged her to lead
that gymnastic performances far be
yond, the powers of the average girl
are. simple to her. She dances for her
chums with grace and abandon that
positively thrill them, and which they
enjoy more tWan matinees, judging
from their gleeful tales. With those
pranks, Miss Roosevelt mingles a tune
ful jumble of coon and college songs,
which her hearers regard as the quin
tessence of music. Her men friends
are treated only to her vocal feats.
MONKEYS AS GAY WAYS.
From the Lahore Tribune.
Recently a monkey got the better of
the common enemy, the carrion crow,
by feigning illness. He was fastened
to a bamboo pole with a running ring.
When he was on his perch the crows
annoyed him by stealing from his por
ringer on the ground.
One morning they had been specially
disagreeable. He closed his eyes and
feigned a bad illness. When his day’s
food Was brought him the crows de
scended upon it, and he had scarcely
strength to defend it. By good acting
he managed to capture one of the
crows. To pluck it alive was the ob
vious course. Then, instead of pulling
it to pieces, like the king monkey
whom Kipling and Sir Edward Buck
watched enjoying a similar triumph at
Simla, this monkey tossed the crow
into the air, where its own compan
ions fell upon it and killed It.
Monkeys certainly hav£ a sense of
fun. Darwin used to spend hours
watching a young female orang-outang
in the Zoological Gardens, and was
sure that she had the comte sentiment.
She delighted to put upon her head,
like a cap, a peculiar shaped bowl,
which had a droll effect, and she was
sensitive to the effect which her joke
produced upon the spectators.
SIN FISH IN ONE.
From the Los Angeles Times.
When Angelo Carnella, of the fish
ing boat Rlva, cast his nets off Alca
traz Island, near San Francisco, the
other night he hoped for nothing bet
ter than a good catch of sea bass. On
hauling them in he found that he had
nearly 4,000 pounds of fish, but hie
weight was all united In the body of
one—a shark. To the excited imagi
nations of Carnella and his crew of
seven men It was fully eighty feet long
and weighed somewhat over seven
tons, Calmer estimates reduced these
proportions to somewhat nearer the
true figures, which are twenty feet of
length and a weight of about 3,500
pounds.
With considerable difficulty the shark
was hauled aboard, after It had de
stroyed about SSO worth of nets. The
crew heroically held down sudh por
tions of the fish as they could grasp,
while Carnella attacked It with a boat
hook. After a short struggle the
shark was subdued and the Rlva made
for home.
Upon cutting the shark open there
were found Inside six large porpoises,
which had been swallowed whole.
SHOOTS FOR 100 MILKS.
From the Philadelphia Record.
Remarkable claims are made for the
new American gun invented by J.
Hamilton Brown. The work of con
structing a six-inch experimental piece
is in charge of Col. John M. Ingalls,
retired United States Army, an artll
erlst of high standing and reputation.
Despite the Incredulity of contempora
ry gun-builders, Col. Ingall9 and the
officers with him assert that this six
inch gun will throw thirty miles a pro
jectile weighing 100 pounds, which will
pierce a six-inch steel target. A writ
er In Everybody’s Magazine calculates
that a ten-inch gun of this construc
tion, with a powder chamber of 14,259
cubic Inches and using 360 pounds of
smokeless powder, would hurl a 600-
pound projectile a distance of fifty
nine miles. v
Increasing this ratio, a 16-inch gun
would have an extreme range of more
than 100 miles, and equipped with such
coast-defense rlllcs, England and
France could shell each other across
the Channel.
THE MEXICAN NAVY.
From the Washington Star.
Mexico recently added two modern
gunboats to Its smalt nav&l fleet, and
two similar vessels are now In process
of construction at Genoa, Italy. In
recent years Mexico has devoted some
attention to fortifying her coasts, but
has not Increased her navy until now.
The two vessels building In Italy will
be named Bravo and Morelos. Exclu
sive of these Italian built ships the
Mexican navy consists'of four gun
boats In the Gulf of Mexico and two
on the PadAc coast, besides several
small patrol boat* in Southern waters.
The two vessels recently built In the
United States are the moet formidable
ship# In the Mexican navy. There Is
a naval school at Vera Cruz, also an
arsenal and a small floating dock, aa
well as a small wooden dock at Ouay
mss, In the Gulf of California.
Headache
Biliousness, soar stomach, eocsttns.
tion and all liver ilia are cured by
Hood’s Pills
The non-irritating cathartic. Prtca
25 cents of all druggists or by m.n 2
C.L Hood <4 Cos., Lowell. Mass.
SAVANNAH ELECTRIC CO.
WINTER WEEK DAY SCHEDULE.
Effective Oct. 3. 1904.
„ . ISLE OF HOPE LINE. '
—etween Isle of Hope and 40th Street
Lv. 40th St. Lv Isle of „.■
A M - - A. P°£
7:30 7-00
1:30 2 ; 30 . • Wo ITo
|s.|2 3:30 * 0: °0 *4:00
11,30 . 11:00
•••ee0.30 a .!
6:30 i zrr ?22
10 :°
_Vla Montgomery to city.'* 11,45
Between Isle of Hope & Thunde^ir
"lil *6:00 17:22 Hilo
•iii 22 3:22 6(33
fl2-m4nute wait "at Sandfly. o 1,38
j- arcel car, passenger trailer.
MONTGOMERY SCHEDULE
Between Montgomery and 40th Street.
iV-SSE”*
•5:50 (1:30 g.SV
I 6:50 82:30 . do'3o lie
t7:53 t3:05 H®
9:50 t5:50 .’ H 0
- "*••• 2:5®
•Connects with parcel car ifor city
tThrough to Thunderbolt. y ’
cltv mit< * WaJt at Sandfl y ffolng to
Between Montgomery & Thunder
A. M. P. M. A M p~ir"
m 3 :®5 7:23 P ':3B
7-o° . 8: . 22
mill-haven schedule.
Effective July 13. 1903.
A Leave Whitaker and SajT~streets.
&& 5%
6:49 10:40 1 : 20 tin
•7 oo ii:2o J.’oS 2:22
2. 40 *:2O 8:00
—?■ 2B -• • 4:40 ....
. .. Leave MiH-Haven.
•fi VTf s&K* PM. PM.
7 : 00 iw2 12:20 5:40
11,40 1:00 *:O5
V. 40 1 : ° 6:20
HX :20 7:00
900 ■*"’*' 5 :0 ° 7:40
2-22 * :4 ° 3:20
!•:* ::::: B 4 ; : 0:00
•Dally except Sunday. * ** *■
_S_*TTTRDAT EVENING SPECIAL -
Leave Whitaker Leave \riiT~
and Bay SU. Hav,?'
9 M 20
10-40 10:20
12:12 11:00
1 1 : 20 - 13:00
THUNDERBOLT LINE.
City Market to Casino and Thunder
bolt via Bolton street junction
Beginning at 6:30 a. m. cars leave
City Market for Casino and Thunder
bolt every half hour until 2:00 p m
after which cars run every 16 minutes
until 11:30 p. m.
Cars leave Bolton street Junction 15
minutes after leaving time at Citv
Market.
Beginning at 6:68 a. m. cars leave
Live Oak station for city eveVhaK
hour until 2:38 p. Vn„ after which
time cars leave every 15 minutes until
12:03 midnight.
COLLINSVILLE LINE.
Beginning at 6:05 a. m., cars leave
Waters road and Estill avenue every
20 minutes until 1:45 p. m., after
which cars leave every 15 minutes
commencing at 2:07 p. m., until 12 07
midnight.
<U? 5 a - cars leave
City Market for Waters road and Es
tll avenue every 20 minutes until 1-45
p. m„ after which Thunderbolt cars
leave every 15 minutes, commencing
at 2:00 p. m„ connecting with Collins
ville cars at Bolton and Ott streets.
Last car leaves Market at 11:46 p. m.
WEST END LINE rT-In coin Park.)
Car leevw west aide of City Market for Lin.
coin Park 6:tf> a. m. and every 40 minutes
thereafter until 11:45 p.m. minutes
Car leaves Lincoln Park for Market 6:20a. m
end every 40 minutes thereafter until 12 o'clock
midnight.
I FMIGH/ ANb PARCEL CAR '
. eßt Me of City Market for Thunder
bolt. Cattle Park. Sandfly. Isle of Hope and all
intermediate points—:lsa. m.. 1:15 pTm.,6:IJ
Leaves Isle of Hope for Sandflr. Cattle Park.
Thunderbolt and all intermediate point.
a. m., 11:00a m.,3:00p. m. Poinis-e:w
freight car leaves Montgomery at 550 a ra
sed 2:35 p. m., connecting at Sandfly with reg
ular parcel car foi city.
Parcel car from the city oarrtes freight to
Montgomery on each trip
Regular parcel ear carries trailer On eaoh
trip for accommodation of passengeia
Any further information regarding passen
ger schedule or freight servloe can be had by
applying to L. B. NASH. Manages
FOOTBALL
TIME IS HERE AND WE HAH
THEM—THE ONLY THING TO
KICK ABOUT IN OUR ENTIRE
STORE.
Wli ARE HEADQUARTERS
FOR HEAD HELMETS, PANTS,
JACKETS, NOSE MASKS, SHIN
GUARDS, AND INFLATERS,
Edward Lovell’s Sons
111 Broughton Street, West,
DR. PERKINS'
-American Herbs-
Guaranteed to Cure
Asthma, Lungs, Rheumatism.
Kidney Disorders, Livsr Complaint.
Constipation, Sick and Nervous
Headache, Neuralgia, Dyspepsia-
Fever and Ague, Scrofula, Female
Complaints, Nervous Affeotiona,
Erysipelas, Catarrh, and a’.l dis
eases arising from lmpurs blood.
Mall orders sl.lO. Office, No. 1®
Congreae street, west.
PROP. R. U GENTRY.
Savannah. Oa.
OLD NEWSPAPERS. 106 TO* *
oenta. at Buetnaes Offio* Hu***
Mown.