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C r a are the meadows In Little Hoy Land, A r S .Ann are tin ski"' Uidlog over, An i H'.l.lfii the butterflies flitting about isi llt tin) iiuk tin J hliM uluver, 1 Ur are cool, running brooks where the cows Ilka to ttauJ, An milky-whiw lamtAlu la Little Uoy Land. Oh! Down at the Corner la Little Boy Land It the pre ttlft shop full of candy, An ! dfr luue womua tu give It away It's ever and ever to bandy. There are chocolate creams, which the hoy say are "gran 1," Arid notllug costs money lu Llttlo lJoy Lund. Ob! Ftrang-t a It seems there era no chorea to do, No errand 10 run for the mother, And nothing to (In hut forerer to play I I ret ohm Jolly game, then another. There's h bi-iuttful circus and a lovely brass band, And everything's free In Little Hoy Land. Oh! Thrty AV they do nothing In Little Hoy Land But play through the witrm, sunny weather, And play through the Wlmer. Oh! then it la fun To ullde down the long hills together. There's no school to go to; -now please understand, It's all piny and laughter In Little iky Laud. Oh! There's bicycles, tricycles, wagons and sleds, And donkeys and ponla by dozens; Bo each little fellow can ride. If he will Each one of the brothers and cousins. There's fun and thero's frolic on every hand Oh! Who wouldn't like It In Little Boy Land Oh! Who wouldn't long fcr this Little Boy Land Where there's fun going on every minute, And candy for nothing, ud peanuts the same, And a good time with every one In It? On! Urown-ups, with trials und hardHhlpsto stand, Let'a journey together to Little Boy Laud! Harriet Francene Crocker, in Tuck. I COLONEL JIM. A CHARMING STORY OF MODERN AUTOM OBI LING DAYS It was the smoke-room of the Cos mopolitan club, in Piccadilly. I had strolled in for the want of something better to do, and without any thought or idea of anything or anvbodv. There were only about half a dozen members present, to one only of whom Charlie Maxwell, in his pre-nuptial days aii iuvelerate globe-trotter, as I myself still was I was personally known. I just nodded to him, as I saw that he was engaged in conversation with 4 an individual whom I never remem ' bered to have seen at the club before. Though he was sitting back in the depths of a big armchair, I gathered that he was tall and athletically built. IDs hair and heavy moustache were snowy white, yet his features had that look of perpetual youth about them which some men retain to the close even of patriarchal life. But it was not so much the wonder ful youthfulness of the man (I reck oned him to be at least sixty years o age) as the almost womanly expres sion of tenderness in his eyes that at tracted me. It did not detract one iota from his manliness; it simply sup plied the one thing necessary to make that manliness perfect and complete. I was on the point of leaving when there entered the room a man for whom I, in common with most of the V club members, had an unmitigated dis e " Coarse of speech, ostentatiously vul gar in his manner, and, In fact, an absolute "impossible" from the social point of view, it was a perennial source of wonder with everybody how be could ever have been admitted to "Cosmopolitan" membership. n It was rumored that he was the mil - Jioriaire son' of a deceased East-end "ready-made" tailor of Semitic de scent, and that he owed his admission among us to -the largely exerted in fluence of a certain impecunious peer, his great friend, and one of the orig inal promoters of the club. j The truth of this could not be ex iy actly proved, although after events i. showed that for once rumor did not act up to its reputation for lying. Almost immediately after this very estimable individual's entrance his name, by the way, was Marcus Disch man my friend Maxwell came across to where I stood looking out of the window into Piccadilly, and shook hands, asking me to excuse him for v ten minutes, and saying that he would have a chat with me on his return. V Complete silence reigned in the room , after Maxwell's departure, broken only by the rustle of newspapers or an occasional cough. Then I was suddenly startled by :A . the voice of Disehman, raised in loud -altercation. I I turned sharply round, and saw that he was standing, straddle-legged, in front of the white-haired gentle man's chair, wagging his head and forefinger in time to a stream of an gry abuse. ' "You've monopolized that paper -,ever since I've been in the room, and for how long before, goodness only knows! Do you think you've bought s the place, Just because you've been in the army?" The occupant of the armchair rose up out of it to his full height of well over six feet, and calmly laid down the paper he had been reading on the table beside him. It was then that I noticed for the first time that his right sleeve was empty, indicating the loss of his arm. "Sir," he said, with quiet Irony, ".it l3 evident to ire that you have not been in the army, Inasmuch as the officer invariably implies the gentleman.". DOY LAND. The retort might have been Injudi cious, but it was certainly richly de served. Furious with passion Disehman ex tended his arm, and violently shook the empty sleeve pinned up to the lapol of the other's coat. "You dare to taunt me! You!" he shrieked. "How came you by this? Not in battle! No! Do you think I have not heard of a certain gentle man's little affair with a certain young lady? The motor-car ride to Brighton! too much champagne! a spill! and a smashed arm? Do you think I don't know? Bah! you got your deserts, Mr. Officer and gentle man!" The re'st of us thought It high time now to interfere, for the wretched cad was evidently contemplating further violence. The matter, however, was suddenly taken out of our hand3. Unseen by me, Maxwell had come into the room, and had heard the frantic speech of Disehman. As the last word left the bully's mouth Maxwell's hand was on his collar, and his knuckles pressing un comfortably upon his collar bone. Swinging the fellow round, he didn't speak, to him, but, summoning a wait er, bid him call the club secretary. Held secureiy in Maxwell's grip, Disehman looked the picture of vul gar discomfiture. "Mr. Shaw," said Maxwell to the secretary when he appeared, "I take the responsibility of demanding from you this man's instant expulsion. He has not only grossly insulted Colonel Fergusson, resorting even to personal violence, but by so doing on the club premises has insulted also every mem ber of it. If you do not accede to my request, I, and I think, every right minded and self-respecting mem ber will immediately send In our resig nations." Maxwell slightly loosened his hold while addressing the secretary, en abling Disehman to shake himself free. With one glance of scorching hate at his late captor, Disehman, not waiting for the secretary's decision, walked out of the room, and of the club, which latter he has never again entered since that day. Colonel Fergusson, far from being upset or disturbed by what had oc curred, had quietly resumed his seat and his paper. laiDot, said Maxwell, allow me to introduce you to Colonel James Ferguson, D. S. 0., late Dragoon Guards; but known to all who love him as 'Colonel Jim.' Colonel, my old friend Archie Talbot, whom I haven't seen for all the years he has been wandering about the earth." "Mr. Talbot, pleased to know you; though I warn you to take every thing Charlie Maxwell has to say about me with a very large grain of salt." If he when silent was attractive, in conversation he was delightful. What I subsequently learned about him from ILaxwell, especially con cerning one particular episode of his life, did not in the least surprise me; it simply served to perfect the picture of the noblest man and truest-hearted gentleman that It has ever been my lot to meet. It was one evening after a bachelor dinner at Maxwell's house his wife being in Scotland on a family visit that my friend told me the true story of the Incident, in the course of which "Colonel Jim" had lost his arm. and aa a result of which he had to retire from the service in the heydey of a most distinguished career. "Perhaps you uon't know." raid Maxwell, "that Fergusson and I wore In the fame regiment. He was full major when I Joined M Beeond lieu tenant. "Though there, was a good fifteen years difference of ago between Ufl, we Ixcame rUunh friends. Without be ing grandmotherly. Fergunhon Kept met from all Borta of tomfooleries, audi ns hot-headed young oflb era aro so apt to Indulge in. "Our Colonel was Harvey Fane, now a Major General and a K. C. II., with a large family of daughters, and hl3 house was an attractive centre for bachelor officers, eligible and ineligi ble. "It was not long before I discovered that Beatrix Fane was more to me than all the other girls of my ac quaintance. "Very soon, too, I was successful kn getting her assurance that I, in like manner, was the veritable 'fairy prince.' "Of course I confided in Colonel Jim, who though sympathetic, advised a wise waiting until at any rate I suc ceeded to the property, which I inher ited six years ago. "Attached to the regiment was a certain Captain Holroyd, who wa3 said to be connected In some way with a monster firm of East-end clothiers. Any way, ho was very un popular with all ranks. "Quite accidentally I heard, the day after tho recent affair at the Cos mopolitan, that Holroyd was Disch- man's cousin, hence the fact of the for mer's knowledge of what I am going to tell you about 'Colonel Jim.' "This man Holroyd was an invet erate gambler, and nearly always won. It so happened that when I came into the Wharton estate there was a large accumulation of ready money which I immediately proceeded to spend iu right royal style. Hol royd, ever on tho scent for a pigeon to pluck, suddenly became very friendly with me, and one day invited me to pass a week with him at Brighton. Glad of a change, and having easily obtained leave, I left Aldershot with Holroyd without acquainting 'Colonel Jim' of my intention. As a matter of fact I knew perfect ly well what would be his advice, and therefore, I evaded It. I did not even tell Beattie, but wrote her on my ar rival at Brighton. All went well un'il the third day, except that I lost heavily at bridge to Holroyd, when, after a dinner to which Holroyd had Invited two or three other men, we all adjourned for an hour's stroll on the pier. "Whether it was that, being un used to excessive indulgence in wine, I had taken too much champagne, or whether I was seized with sudden ill ness, I cannot exactly say. I only know that by some unaccountable means I managed to fall from the pier into the sea, getting a nasty smack tnrough coming into contact with one of the iron cross-girders. "I remembered nothing more till I found myself alone in my Brighton lodging, wretchedly ill, and very much ashamed of myself. "The doctor who attended me, a splendid fellow, told me that Holroyd had returned to Aldershot without troubling to find out my real condi tion. "That night late, a further surprise was in store for me. Beattie, accom panied by Colonel Jim, the latter with a seriously injured arm, arrived at my diggings in Warrior Square. "It was soon apparent that Colonel Jim was in a bad way, my doctor, after a brief examination of the in jured arm, declaring that immediate amputation was necessary. "All the time I was in absolute ig norance of how the accident had hap pened, or how'it was that Beattie had come to Brighton in Colonel Jim's company. "It was not until the operation was over, and Mrs. Fane who was wired for at once, had arrived to look after her wandering daughter, that' I learned the whole story from Beattie's lips. "As some little explanation of what took place, let me say that both Col onel Fane and Colonel Jim were ar dent motorists, each possessing a twelve-horse-power Tanhard, which they were eternally pitting the one against the other. "Colonel Jim always drove his car himself, but Colonel Fane, not being so expert, employed a French chauf feur, at fabulous wages. "Well, it seems that the day before I recovered consciousness my land lady, who, up to then, had no clew to the whereabouts of my friends, came across a letter of Beattie's while get ting some clean linen for me out of my portmanteau. Without staying to think who the writer might be she at once wrote to her, and, as it after ward appeared, gave a very exagger ated account of my condition. "When the landlady's letter arrived the colonel's motor was waiting at the door for him on his return from pa rade. "Without pause or thought my fool ish, loving little girl imperiously or dered the driver to set off for Brigh ton there and then, silencing his ob jections with threats of her father's displeasure if he disobeyed her. "Was there ever such a mad journey, a Journey, too, at which her social world would hold up its hnds in holy horror. "On through Guildford, TunbrH,- Wells, Horsham, mi thfl outskirts c.f Lewes were reached. And there tho trouble lgan. "Tho chauffeur had ImdHtcd more than once on deBccndlng at certain inns and refreshing hlniHelf with brandy. "By tl.o time I wea was in night tho man was in a Mat of Kemi-intoxb a tlon, and was quite incapable of con trolling the machine. "Chancing to turn her head at this point, Ileattlo saw coming up behind them at racing cpeed half a mile cr a) astern, another motor, which, even at that distance, wemfd strangely fa miliar to her. "Nearer and nearer It urew, tho stupefied Frenchman in charge of the leading car becoming more and more unablo to stf er it. "It was at a bend In the road that the catastrophe happened. "On the right hand was a high bank, and into this the driver made to run Beattie's car. "By a miracle of mercy ho could not turn the steering whe?l, over-balancing himself and falling out under the wheels In front, which passed over I1I3 body. "Thougll bewildered and panic stricken, Beattie caught hold of tho gear with both trembling hands and tried to keep the car straight. What would have been the result of her efforts it is hard to say, though it ia almost morally certain that in the streets of Lewfes,she would Inevitably have come to grief. "Now fcr Colonel Jim's part in It. "Putting on tho pace for a final spurt, he raced alongside of the run away, managed to step his own ma chine, at the same moment leading on to the other one. "Seizing the steering wheel witn hi3 left hand his right arm was broken on the leap he wrenched it round and brought the car to a full stop. "Then appeared the representative of the law, who, running back, dis covered that the chauffeur was fatal ly injured. "The rest you know, though there is one little thing more which I will tell you in confidence, as it renders, from my point of view, all that Colonel Jim did that day the more heroic. "Beattie told me, more than a year after we were married, that some words that escaped her rescuer's lips as he reached her side in the flying car, eonvinced her beyond all doubt that he loved her, and that he risked his life for the sake of a woman whom he knew had given her heart to an other man. "How Colonel Jim came to follow after Beattie was owing to a servant at the house, who overheard her or ders to the chauffeur, telling him, as he drove up in his own machine al most directly afterward and inquired for her. He knew that her action would compromise her with her friends and society, and, in her in terests, decided to persuade her to come back. "Of course, the dear old fellow had to leave the service, though he has since got his step on the retired list. Now, what do you think of him, Tal bot?" "Think pf him?" t said. "Why, that for a man among men, I never expect to meet another like Colonel Jim!" "As you certajnly never will!" said Maxwell, raising his glass. "Here's ta Colonel Jim, and God bless him!" New York News. Girl Corners Nut Market. Bernice Bardine, a pretty Texas girl, who is yet under 20 years of age, has displayed judgment and business acu men of a high order. Last year Miss Bardine and her brother, younger than herself, made a little money gathering pecans. Since then she has been study ing the business and laying plans for future operations. During the last summer she carried on an extensive correspondence, not only with mer cantile establishments in various ci ties that handled pecans, but with re liable people who reside in regions where the toothsome nut grows. In this way she became thoroughly post ed on the present crop. Feeling confident that pecans would command a good price, she sot to work come weeks ago and quietly leased ev ery pecan grove and forest of any value in the Colorado valley. When buyers appeared, startling the ranch ers by offering to engage pecans at 7 1-2 cents per pound, those who make a business of gathering the nuts were astounded to discover that a young girl had cornered the crop so far a3 this particular region is concerned. A little investigation showed that this energetic woman is in a fair way to make a fortune in a few months. It is known that she got a bargain in near ly all of her leases. As a sample of her shrewdness, she leased cne for est for $100, in which there are sev eral giant trees, that will yield 20 bushels or SS0 pounds cf pecans. At a low estimate tho profits from this single transaction will fall little short of $3000. Oakum picking by feminine prison ers in English prisons has now practi cally ceased. Instead they make their own garments r.nd those of the mal? priL-cers. REJECTED. I'npngod to another It's not that I cara. But ciin It b true that he thluks her roor fair? To me he confided his woes and regret, But now lu her smlii-s all the jimhI he forgets; The moments toKether-nt one I'd recall But he -ar thy loht now he's newly in thrall? Time was, In our love, we rx hungod a fond ks Do new fuund caresies annul that pimt bll!fl? Fne probably loves him with love deen and true, But my heart's devotion why couldn't that do? I wkh them I wish them all joy In this Ufa, BerLaps she will make him a much Iwtter wlfo. New York Herald. HUMOROUS. Wlgg I feel that Borrowell owes mo an apology. Wagg I wish that waa all he owed me. Wife (during tho quarrel) What made you marry me, then? Husband Why, you did, of course. Mrs. Rlttenhouse Squeers Are they fashionable people? Mrs. De Lanccy Place Oh, no. They have children. Beaver A good many of life's les sons are learned at his mothei's knee In boyhood. Weaver Yes at or over them. Miss Caustlque Women have been born to command as well a3 men. Mr. Cynicus Of course, the women who Eft married. "Your daughter, remarked the suit or, "is without a peer." "Yes," re turned the old man proudly, "but I've got my eye on a duke for her." Wigg Many a woman discovers that she has married the wrong man. Wagg Well, I've heard that marriage sometimes makes another man of a fellow. "How did you fall?" Inquired the sympathetic bystander. "Down!" snapped the sufferer. "You didn't ex pect to see me soaring up toward the sky, did you?" Husband I can't see, my dear, what good that border of furs does around the bottom of your skirt. Wife Well, it does lots of good. It shows tho neighbors that you can afford it. "M:a. Stimpson thinks she belongs to the upper ten, don't she?" "I think so. At least, she and Stimpson can total up 10 all right. She looks out for number one and stimpson is a mere ci pher." Witherby (savagely) Isn't it about time to have those windows cleaned? Mrs. Witherby Why they were cleaned only recently. Withe: by How recently. Mrs. Witherby Two girls ago. "What beautiful blond hair she has!" "Yes, and waht beautiful dark eyes! Her hair must have been of the same color originally." "I happen to know otherwise, Miss Jenny. Her hair is of the true love sort." "How's that?" "Never dyes." The presence of mind of an impecu nious lover was illustrated recently at a bazaar, where there was a stall for the sale of watch charms. "Oh, George!" she said, "buy me a charm." "Sarah," answered he, "you have too many already." "Remember," said the woman who tries to make people happy, "that somewhere the sun is shining." "Of course it is," answered her husband. "And somewhere there are tons upon tons of coal. The thing is to get all this genial warmth right here where it is needed." Rocksley I like this place so much that I should like to settle down and make my home here. I have the refus al of the nicest house in town, and, do you know, Miss Alice, I wish I could get the same terms from the nicest girl in town. Alice If you want my refus al, you can have It. "On what ground," asked the young man who was scheduled for the side track, "do you propose to break our engagement?" "On no ground at all," replied the matter-of-fact female in the case. "When I became engaged to you I was under the impression that you weie a land owner, but I find upon in vestigation that the rumor is ground less." Not Wholly Comforting. Says an authority: "Persons of great stature and well constituted physically and mentally are exceedingly rare. Giants are usually ill formed and short lived." This is very comforting, but it won't prevent amiable but sawed-off citizens from being thrust aside hourly by ill formed and short lived giants. New York Telegram. She Believed Him. "No,", said Yabsley, as he strode into the dining room. "I never missed a train in my life." "I believe you," remarked castic lady in front of him, as she turned to examine and ascertain how many breadths had been ripped loose from her skirtband. Baltimore Ameri can. Pneumatic. Mrs. Malaprop No wonder he's got rheumatism. I understand he has thera kind of tubes in his office. Mrs. Brown What kind of tubes? Mrs. Mabprop Rheumatic. Phila delphia Tresis.