The midland journal., July 14, 1911, Image 6

About The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947

Image provided by: University of Maryland, College Park, MD

                
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B. CLARK
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■■■ HE return to America of Mr. and
Mrs. Nicholas Longworth after their
honeymoon trip abroad gave to
Representative Henry S. Boutell,
Republican, of Chicago, an oppor
tunity to have considerable fun at
/KM the expense of the Democrats. It
wM is known of course that one great
JSk JH ym political party looks to Thomas Jef
fw ferson' as the apostle and prophet
jgSjgsjf of the simple democratic life, and
pffirpgrw knowing this, Mr. Boutell, who ap
parently had been reading some
ancient records, tried his best to
undermine the “simple life” pedestal upon which
Thomas Jefferson stands.
There were some people apparently who thought
that Mrs. Longworth, who is ex-President Roose-
daughter, tnight return from her honeymoon
trip abroad, where she was treated in a measure
like a royal personage, in a frame of mind in which
pride was dominant and that she might have lost
some of her American simplicity. Representative
Boutell made a speech which of course did hot
have Mrs. Longworth for its
central sabject, but he in- 1
troduced matters by saying
that ahe would return to yV'
America, “not Princess
Alice, but the same modest. If i ’ ’ mt
unassuming daughter of the I I fy : j||
president that it was her || ' Jg
Mrs. Longworth came in- ll OLes .
to Mr. Boutell’s speech only ll pS
as an incident of discourse, ll
.-■theußepublican represents- ll V
tive’s main Intention being ll • (SF" / M
apparently to v attempt to re- ll
lute the statement made by.
Representative Wheeler of I
Kentucky that the Republi
can party under present ad
ministration was introduc
tog “truculent sycophancy
and flunkeylsm” into our * ant/t
intercourse with represents- J. SOU?
tives of foreign powers.
The Chicago Republican looked at the Democ
racy’s Mississippi chieftain (now a United States
senator), then turned his eyes to the then sub
chieftain, Champ Clark bf Missouri, and said:
“I wish to read a few words of Thomas Jefferson.”
The chieftain looked more than a bit startled.
“I read from the 'Complete Writings of Jeffer
son,’ by Ford,” went on Mr. Boutell slowly. “It
appears from this letter that Adams was just
about to go as a business agent of Jefferson to
-London, and after giving him several commis
sions, he writes:
“'One further favor and I am done; to search
the Herald office for the arms of my family. I
have what I have been told were the family
arms, but on what authority I know not. It is
possible there may be none. If so, I will with
your assistance become a purchaser, having
Stearne’s word for it that a coat of arms may
he purchased as cheap as any other coat.’
“So here we have the founder of the Democratic
party Just dabbling, as it were, in syncophancy —
not very truculent as yet."
There was no quick recovery on the part of
the Democratic members from this blow, which,
while directed fair at their idol, hit them hard
to glancing. Finally, Mr. Sulzer, the East side
statesman, recovered sufficiently to ask in what
year it was that Jefferson had commissioned a
man to buy the coat of arms. On learning that
it was In the year 1771, Mr. Sulzer said, with an
Intonation that showed he had found a grain of
comfort in the thought, "That was five years
before the revolution.”
The New York representative’s consolation
morsel apparently was not big enough to go
round among his neighbors with an appreciable
ahare of each. It was a bit hard to learn after
many years that the man who wrote the Immortal
document beginning with ringing words about
equality had been trying to buy something which
would go to show that he was a trifle “more equal”
than his neighbors; and the blow was like unto
that of a bludgeon, because it was shown that the
supposedly impeccable one had more than inti
mated that a counterfeit coat was as good as
a genuine one if only it were nobly emblazoned.
The Republicans had a rare time of it over the
Democratic discomfiture. When it comes to fun
the galleries are gloriously nonpartisan. The
humor of the thing was to the people aloft well
worth the knocking of a prop from the third presi
dent’s pinnacle. Things might not have been so
altogether bad for the cause of Mr. Jefferson and
his house disciples if Mr. Boutell had been content
to stop, for everybody recognizes the weakness
that all human nature —even that sternly simple
type—has for crests and other family gewgaws.
“Yes,” said the Chicago man, "it was five years
before the revolution. Now, just before the revolu
tion, on August 25, 1775, the great founder of the
Democratic party, the introducer of ‘truculent
sycophancy' into our national administration,
wrote to John Randolph from Monticello urging
a reconciliation with Great Britain, and in that
letter he uses this expression:
“ ‘I am sincerely one of those who would rather
be in dependence on Great Britain, properly lim
ited, than any other nation on earth, or than on
no nation.”’
The last five words of this Jeffersonian pro
nouncement it would seem, it language means
anything, point to a desirp on the part of the
Virginian Democrat that tife colonies should have
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an ownership cable of kind connecting them with
one of the over-the-sea powers.
As Mr. Boutell put it: “It seems possible that,
having purchased bis coat of arms, Jefferson
feared that on the declaration of independence
and the establishment of a republican form of
government it would not be an available asset,
and so he hoped that dependence would continue.’’
The memory of this speech dwells in congress.
It was intentionally light, but it drove home the
lesson that frailties of a certain kind are not
confined to members of any political party.
When in the future an American citizen dies as
the result of eating adulterated food that has been
. an article entering into interstate commerce, a
coroner’s jury will be justified in bringing in a
verdict of suicide. In order not to be too hard on
the deceased, the jury may give the cause as
carelessness, but whichever of the twain the ver
dict be, the “recently died” will be held responsi
ble.
The pure-food bill which passed Congress is
a strong measure. Proir to its passage it was
the cause of more misunderstandings, more sus
picions and of more abuse of men and measures
than was any other which congress thought it
worth while to consider.
Representative James R. Mann of Chicago
piloted the bill through the house. He was ex
pounder and exhorter, and during the greater part
of four days he held the interest of the seasoned
members as a school teacher holds the interest of
wide-open-eyed children to whom tales of a hither
to unknown are told—and it was tales of the
hitherto unknown that Mr. Mann told to the
Washington-gathered children of a larger growth.
For amazement and curiosity, for interest and
Indignation there was no scene of the winter in
the big hall of congress like unto that enacted
while the Hyde Park representative set forth his
wares in bottle and in box and gave his colleagues
full knowledge of the Indigestible and poisonous
stuff that the stomach of the American had been
taking to its own all the years under the sacred
names of food and medicine.
The house has*-upon most occasions the saving
grace of taking things in part humorously. A
joke saves many a situation, assauges anger and
disarms the man whose tongue under stress of
temper becomes a sharp weapon.
There were few jokes during the discussion of
the pure-food bill. The subject was as deadly
serious as were some of the “food” products dis
played on the Chicago representative’s desk. Once
in a while the gravity was relieved by a quip,
but as a matter of fact the joke of the thing was
of the past —a huge joke, if a grim one, cracked
by food preparers and medicine manufacturers
at the expense of the stomachs and the livers of
the American people.
Mr. Mann told of an American firm that had
been importing rotten —yes, rotcen—eggs, which,
after treatment with boric acid, were sold to
candy-makers and cake-bakers. Mr. Gaines of
Tennessee expressed gratitude that the imports
did not get into eggnoggs. The laugh was faint.
Every member was thinking of the candy and
the cake and stomachs of the child multitude.
The half has never been told in the public
prints of the food frauds which Representative
Mann disclosed In the time—often extended —
alloted to him to press this bill to a passage.
Some of his exhibits were ground “coffee” made
of roasted beans, oats, pilot bread, charcoal, red
slate, bark and date stones; cinnamon made)of
sawdust; whole pepper made of tapioca and lamp
black; cocoa made of walnut shells' and oxide,
and a thousand and one other foods adulterated
in a thousand and one ways.
The drinks were worse. Prom the exposition
made in the house—and in this subject an interest
deeper than any draught that he had ever taken
was shown by every member —it would seem
that the man who leads a friend to the bar and
asks what he will have gives his friend no choice,
for the bartender will set out what the spirit
moves, and it seldom will move a pure spirit.
The members of congress learned by formulas
presented, bearing the name and address of deal
ers, that skim milk masquerading as cream is a
deception of babe-like innocence compared with
the “pure domestic" and “fine imported” whiskies
and cordials which are set forth for the damnation
of a drinker’s stomach if not for the damnation
of his soul. The hope may be expressed, possibly
without incuring the charge of vindictiveness, that
in this case the curse returns to roost behind the
bar.
To Representative Henry T. Rainey Is due large
ly the fact that the bones of John Paul Jones rest
in the land for which he fought. It was the Illi
nois'Democrat who first took up the matter of the
search for the commodore's remains and who
started the Investigation which later made General
Porter’s work possible.
n —given credit in full for his
share of the labor, for
yk modesty has held him
\\ silent.
\ Congress at the outset
dsPPjjHist I did enough to discourage
JlKteijliilP / ten men ordinary en
|P> I ergy from carrying on the
I quest for anybody’s bones.
I Mr. Rainey refused to be
■ I gibed out of his purpose,
// and although he could not
B // Induce his colleagues to
| JJ take him altogether seri-
Ky ously, he followed the bent
W// his belief in other direc-
Wy tions and now John Paul
Jones rests at Annapolis.
——The Illinois member in-
MS troduced a resolution pro
viding for the finding and
for the removal to Amer
ica of the Scotch sailor’s remains. The resolution
called for an appropriation of >IO,OOO to pay the
expenses. Then the fun began. The mockers in
the house declared that the commodore was buried
deep in a cemetery under mlllion-dollar business
structures on the Rue Grande Aux Belles or on
the Rue des Ecluses Saint Martin or 'on several
Other rues which they could not pronounce.
Congress in Its humor had the aid and jocose
correspondents, who saw the rare jest in the bones
search and made the most of it. And here recol
lection brings a blush of contrition to the cheeks
of one who followed in the train. Members said
and correspondents wrote that the French doubtless
gradly would allow their business palaces to be un
dermined and toppled to ruin on the payment of
SIO,OOO of Yankee cash.
If Yankee cheek, the representatives said, aided
by French politeness, could accomplish the purpose
of building demolition, there would be small chance
of separating Jones' bones with any certainty of
identity from those of the French sleepers In the
old cemetery. One scoffer suggested with fine irony
that there might be a bit of the original Scotch
skull left, and that Sidney Smith’s rule might be
applied to make positive the identification.
Mr. Rainey was undisturbed. He was not even
moved to surrender when suggestion was made that
if the SIO,OOO were sent over to some French grave
digger he would find the old sea dog's bones and
prove their genuineness if he had to tattoo the
sailor's autograph in the tibia of the left leg to
do it * %
It was two years on the way, but the last laugh
came, and it was Mr. Rainey who had it. His
colleagues made amend for their scoffing and their
scorning, and now another jester of the past writes
belated word of contrition.
THE COLDEST PLACE ON EARTH
What is said to be the coldest place on the globe
la the region of Verkholensk, Siberia. . Here is a
convict station, but during most of the year no
guards are needed to keep the prisoners from run
ning away, for in the more severe portions of the
winter no living creature can remain in the open,
and during the three most severe months, when
the temperature sometimes falls to 85 degrees be
low zero, no one dares to venture out for more
than a few moments at a time.
Ordinary steel tools will snap like glass, and
unseasoned wood becomes almost as hard as
steel. When one breathes a powder like the very
finest snow falls at one’s feet. It is said that there
are less forms of insect life here than elsewhere
in the world, and some of those found are not
found elsewhere, seemingly having been created
especially to inhabit such a frigid region.
Some of the signal-service officials declare that
most of the severe cold waves that sweep across
the North American continent have their origin in
Verkholensk. The wind blows a perfect gale almost
all the time, and that discomfort, added to the low
temperature, would certainly make this a very un
pleasant place in which to spend the winter.
No Help.
A St Louis traveling man, making his first trie
through North Dakota, woke up one May morning
to find the ground white with snow.
“For Heaven’s sake," he asked the hotel clerk,
disgustedly, “when do you have summer out in
this country T*’
“I don’t know,” replied the clerk, “I have only
been here U months.” —Success.
IWK FOR EDUCATION
MANY STUDENTS SUPPORT
THEMSELVES IN COLLEGE.
Statistics Gathered at Princeton Uni
versity Showing the Varied Occu
pations That Were Taken Up
by the Young Men.
Statistics recently gathered at
Princeton, show that 40 per cent, of
the students are working their way
through college. This means* that of
the entire enrollment of 1,442 stu
dents 57T are helping themselves to
gain an education. These figures in
clude all those who are making
money in small and large amounts,
and do not mean that the men are
not getting outside assistance of a
substantial kind. Students paying
half their expenses are included in
20 per cent, figures, and those paying
their way through without any help
from others could be put within the
ten per cent, limit
There are scores of ways of making
money at Princeton, and the fact
that so many students take advantage
of them is sufficient evidence that to
work a little on the side is consid
ered highly honorable by the student
body as a whole, and it explains the
further fact, that among those work
ing their way through are some of
the most prominent men in college,
both in athletics and in scholarship.
One of the most popular ways of
making enough money to help pay a
term bill or keep the recipient in
spending money is work on the col
lege publications.
Agencies of various kinds —from
laundry work to socks that won’t
tear out—give profitable employment.
Three principal laundries doing stu
dent work have student representa
tives. These men are usually ath
letes, as are those who have clothing
and athletic goods agencies. Calen
dars are sold by students at one dol
lar apiece and cigarettes, tobacco,
steins, pennants, sofa pillows, pipes
and the like are offered to the stu
dents, but to freshmen especially, at
the beginning of every college year.
Freshmen carry baskets around, well
stocked with pretzels and chocolates.
Soft hat men come through the dormi
tories in the fall and straw hat men
in the spring. Shoes are sold by stu
dents, and orders for clothing of vari
ous kinds are taken. Program priv
ileges on the occasion of athletic
events are frequented, and the ad
vertising thereon yields a good re
turn.
Students are agents for typewriters,
bicycles, kodaks, golf sticks, caps,
canes and the like. The of
taking newspaper subscription on tbe
campus is considered a good one.
Magazines are represented in Prince
ton by the score. . Pressing establish
ments yield some money.—New York
Times.
What She Wanted.
“I, for one, am in favor of the bill
to abolish the use of aigrettes and
paradise plumes in ladies’ hats. 1
favor this bill not only for moral rea
sons, but for financial ones as well.”
The speaker was Col. Lionel C. Har
ris. the well-known ornithologist of
Memphis. He resumed:
“The cost of these aigrettes and
paradise plumes is a dreadful thing
for any husband to conptemplate. I
saw yesterday a Vtrot hat covered
with aigrettes that was ticketed S2OO.
And that reminds me —
“A lady novelist wrote to a pub
lisher last month:
“ ‘Please send a check in advance
of royalties. I want to buy a new hat
for a June wedding.'
“The accommodating publisher sent
the lady a check for SSO. She as
knowledged it indignantly.
“ ‘I said,’ she wrote, 'that I wanted
a hat, not a veil.’"
Young Worker’s Tragic Death.
The sweep’s boy—the “ramoneur,”
has still to work his tortuous way
through the chimneys in France and
an accident which has just occurred
at Fleury-sur-Andelles calls attention
to the necessity of putting a stop to
the practice. A little Savoyard, named
Charles Ravoise, fourteen years of
age, was sent up the chimney of a
oaker and at the end of three-quarters
of an hour he had not descended. The
alarm was given and the boy was
perceived blocked in the chimney.
Which had to be demolished before
his dead body could be freed. He was
hanging by the neck, having been
cuught in a portion of the chimney
measuring less than six inches across
and asphyxiated.
Birds for Mosquitoes.
Experience of the past few days
has convinced everybody that the
scientific war on the mosquito is a
flat failure. Insectivorous birds are
the only remedy, and not all of theuq
like mosquitoes. The swallow, which
does, is not a street dweller; the
night hawk files high and is a rarity,
and the bat is promptly driven out
of every house he enters. What's
left but to slap and scratch? —
Brooklyn Citizen.
Wagner’s Parentage.
Discussing the autobiography of
Richard Wagner, the Oesterreichische
Wochenschrift says that no one will
ever know whether the truth has all
been published as to the master's
parentage. "It is a fact, though, that
he was registered at school as Rich
ard Geyer and did not take the name
Wagner until he was fourteen years
old.” says this authority.
Doctors Said He Would Die
A Friend’s Advice Saves Life
I wish to speak o£ the wonderful cum
that I hare received from your noted
Swamp-Root, the great kidney and blad
der cure. Last summer I wag taken with
severe pains in my back and sides. I
could not breathe without difficulty and
was nearly wild with the .desire to urinate.
Was compelled to do so every ten min- r
utes, with the passage of pure blood with i
the urine. I tried all the different doo- 4
tors from far and near, but they said it/
was no use to doctor as I would die anyf'
way.- I was at the end of my rope apd
was so miserable with pain and tha
thought that I must die that words can
not' tell how I felt. One day a friend told
me of the wonderful help she had received
from Dr. Kilmer’s Swamp-Root. She gave
me one of your pamuphlets which I read
and determined to try Swamp-Root. After
taking half a bottle I felt better. Hava
now taken ten bottles and am well as I
ever was, thanks to Swamp-Rcot. I wish
to tell all suffering people that have kid
ney, liver or bladder trouble, that Dr. Kil
mer’s Swamp-Root is the best medicine on
the market.
All persons doubting thi statement can
write to me and I will answer them di
rectly, Yours very truly,
CLYDE F. CAMERER,
Rosalie, Wash.
Subscribed and sworn to before me thia
23rd day of July, 19C9.
VERNE TOWNE, Notary Public.
Letter to
Dr. Kilaer * Ce.
Blmghßsatoa, S. T.
Prove What Swamp-Root Will Do For Yon
Send to Dr. Kilmer A Co., Bingham
ton, N. Y., for a sample bottle. It will
convince anyone. You will also receive
a booklet of valuable information, telling
all about the kidneys and bladder. When
writing, be sure and mention this paper.
For sale at all drug stores. Price fifty
cents and one-dollar.
The Humorous Hat.
"Has she any sense of humor?"
“I don’t think so. She can look at
her hat without laughing.”—Llpptn
cott’s.
THIS Will I. INTEREST MOTHERS.
Mother Gray’s Sweet Powders for Children, •
Certain relief for Feverishness, Headache, Bad
Stomach, Teething Disorders, move and regulate the
Bowels and destroy Worms. They break up Colds In
U hours. They are so pleasant to the taste Children
like them. Thty nsrer fail. Sold by all Druggists,
15c. Sample mailed i'KEB. Address Allen S. Olm
sted, 1.0 Boy, N. T.
Exactly.
Noting that another piece of valu
able china had been broken. Sena
tor Allen asked his housekeeper how
the breakage occurred, and she hast
ily replied:
“It fell down and Just broke itself.”
"Merely an automatic brake,” quiet
ly commented the senator.
To Make Fruit Jar Rubber* Last.
To have fruit jar rubbers last, keep
them well covered In a jar full of flour
until used, and as soon as removed
from empty jars. One can then afford
a good quality of rubbers, as kept
thus they will safely last several sear
sons. When there Is doubt of old
rubbers, they may often be made to
eke out one more season by using two
of the rubbers to each jar ahd screw
ing down tight. Always stand newly
filled Jars upside down until cool, to
test the tops and rubbers. —Designer.
Burglar Befriended Him.
A burglar was arrested for robbing
a house up the state some time since,
and the next morning the victim rush
ed wildly into the magistrate’s office.
As soon as he could get his breath to
working again he told the official that
he had come to see about the pris
oner.
“Glad you came down,” was the af
fable response of the magistrate, "1
suppose you want to appear against
him.” \
“Well, I guess not!” exclaimed thd
victim with a glad smile. “I want to
kiss him on the brow and give hints
flO. Among other things that he stole \ _
from the house was a package of love
letters that I wrote to my wife before
we were married.”
WRONG SORT
Perhaps Plain Old Meat, Potatoes anti
Bread May Be Against You
for a Time.
A change to the right kind of food
can lift one from a sick bed. A lady
In Welden, 111., says:
“Last spring I became bed-fast with
severe stomach troubles accompanied
by sick headache. I got worse and
worse until I became so low I could
scarcely retain any food at all, al
though I tried about every kind.
"I had become completely discour
aged, and given up all hope, and
thought I was doomed to starve to
death, until one day my husband, try
ing to find something I could retain,
brought home some Grape-Nuts.
“To my surprise the food agreed
with me, digested perfectly and with
out distress. I began to gain strength
at once. My flesh (which had been
flabby), grew firmer, my health Im
proved in every way and every day,
and in a very few weeks I gained 20
pounds in weight.
“I liked Grape-Nuts so well that for
four months i' ate no other food, and
always felt as well satisfied after eat
ing as if I had sat down to a fine ban
quet.
"I had no return of the miserable,
sick stomach nor of the headaches,
that I used to have when I ate other
food. lam now a well woman, doing
all my own work again, and feel that
life is worth living.
“Grape-Nuts food has been a God
send to my family; It surely saved my
life; and my two little boys have
thriven on it wonderfully.” Name
given by Postum Co., Battle Creek,
Mich.
Read the little book, “The Road to
WellvtUe,” in pkgs. “There’s a reason."
Ever read the above letter! A new
oae appears from tins* to time. They
are genuine, true, and fall of human
taturuot.